How I Became Confident (as an introvert) 

In terms of social situations, I grew up seriously believing I was introverted and awkward and it would be like that forever. During university I went through a lot of challenges, failed a lot and lost the things I believed gave me my identity. When I eventually got over that and decided life was still fun anyway my insecurities just unconsciously withered away. I didn't even realize I changed so much until people told me I was so confident or describe me as a sociable person. It also helps to challenge yourself in competency of a skill. Also, you need to see and I suppose experience what it's like to be rejected, or dismissed or looked down on (idk what to call it but basically if people don't like you for whatever reason) because when that happens you're gonna find that nothing really bad happens, or basically, your life is still yours so, yeah, they got no power. This is rambly, but basically, you're gonna be fine and we're all in this together, we gotta be honest and help each other out.

One thing that helped me step out of my comfort zone is realising that i cant focus how I am acting towards other but just focus on them; how they act, their body language, voice, how they feel... Dont think of them like they are strangers but they are also a human being - like me. They have their own struggles, fears, passions... And lately I discovered that interacting with others is such a powerful way how to learn things not just about world around us but also about ourselves :)

3 things to do in a social situation. 1. Be helpful ( take their coat, offer them a glass of water, help with little things ) 2. Remember everyone is busy with themselves, nobody cares or notices your move at all times ( go ask that question, get embarrassed, do it again) 3. Don't apologize, just own your embarrassments, laugh at yourself and move on.

I LOVE the way you have done a detailed artwork with older people, wrinkles, pigmentation and all engaging in an act of passion!! In art youth is overrepresented saying this as a person under 20 haha so we often overlook the beauty of aging, and how undervalued and stigmatised it is.

Oww my word...please do more painting videos,ypur journey with art,how you've improved and how you express yourself with it...I would love to see that !

Elizabeth, please break out of the feeling of insecurity. You have no reason to be insecure. You are smarter and more talented than most people. Everyone is lucky to know you and be your friend. So never miss a chance to introduce yourself. You are doing them a favor. Every day is wonderful for you.

To break this fear of judgment, every time I start thinking too much about a situation like "maybe I said something embarrassing, imagine they don't like me,..." I say that anything can happen and that if they don't do it like me it's too bad for them and that on the contrary if someone loves me it will be true, simply because I was myself. And then I always meet that person with whom it corresponds and I stay with them. That's how I made good friends every time I moved.

Thank you so much elizabeth for talking about this. I can't tell you how much i appreciate this. I am quite an introverted person but always hated myself for that. I would constantly compare myself to my friends who could easily make friends and talk about anything they want. Over the years I started hating myself because of that and it only makde the whole situation worse. But now as you said, I should not just make changes and try to be who i want to be, but i belive the first step is for me to know it is okay to be who I am. Simply put, I have to realize I am introverted person and there's nothing wrong wiht that, but if I want to be more confident, then I should start acting like one and eventually I'll become confident, although an introvert ( i think i'd be okay with that). :)

Love this video! As a Catholic, I have to say that there is a sort of “graduation” for priests. It’s called an ordination where they say vows. Before then, they are just in seminary learning :) Many men go to seminary and decide it’s not for them. But they were never priests.

Read it somewhere a time ago, there are two types of people: "introverts" who recharge energy by being alone, "extroverts" who recharge energy by being with other people. And you sit somewhere in that scale.

30 seconds into the video and I cannot stop looking at the painting. That's one of the most beautiful paintings I've ever seen, I'm in tears and I have no idea why. I would seriously buy that painting. I amazed you painted that, it's so beautiful 🥺

Your artwork reached me on a deeper level 🥺 It's beautiful. Loved your how you explained your thought process and I resonate with a lot of what you said. It's never too late to do anything if you put in the effort. The fluidity of identity is something I'd like to hear your thoughts on in more detail if possible 🙂

I really appreciate you talking about this so openly, and I do agree with a lot of your points. I’ve thought about confidence a lot throughout my life, which I believe may have been driven by the cognitive dissonance I was experiencing. I felt dissatisfied with how I was not confident about my thoughts and actions, even though I was genuinely convinced that I wanted those thoughts, and that I truly support my actions. One thing that I’ve learned not too long ago, is that what people think is not allowed to be present in my head. It is off limits for anyone but myself. The way I think of it, confidence is more of an internal state (rather than an external image). Although it’s pretty cool to look confident, and the absolute boss. However, we know for a fact that a lot of people who seem pretty badass, can merely be good at putting up a strong front, and could actually be struggling with a lot of insecurities. More recently, I’ve noticed myself bing confident even in my awkward and scattered states. I have my corkiness, and my sometimes atypical expressions of self. I own it, and do my best to not second guess myself - unless there’s good reason to of course (fine line for people with anxiety, but also manageable when you are one who self reflects like a pro ;))

It's so pleasant to look at the drawing process and listen such nice and useful things. I came across your channel an hour ago and I'm already in love with it! Thank you!

Elizabeth Filips i just love, love your channel. You are an icon that deserved to have millions of subscribers, finding your channel just bring me so much happiness. ❤

I found you just yesterday and I've been watching lots of your videos already. I kinda feel like if you were an exact version of myself. I feel completely reflected on your life experiences and even your passions. But I just haven't been able to open and open to the world as you have. It's amazing to see how you are doing it and it inspires me to become more comfortable with myself. Thank you for what you do! 😊😊😊

Such a world of difference between 'they think that' and 'they think that I think that'. The latter says more about their ego.

Strongly recommend Letting Go by David R Hawkins. I was incredibly introverted too but I was able to completely shift that around to where it's not some constant technique maintenance. It's just who I am and it's permanent, you can become extroverted. Being introverted is simply you disowning the expressive aspects of yourself when you were a kid. You thinking because of past trauma or different experiences that it's not okay to just be and flow. It's scary for introverts let go, because they want to control everything, however in letting go of control what you do is you gain more control because when you don't need everything to be perfect you feel more relaxed and comfortable which makes you actually perform better because you're not in a constant state of anxiety over trying to perform a certain way and it just comes out of you effortlessly. You can learn and adapt easier too, so it's not like you can't perfect it. It's just no longer this anxiety controlling you. There are many more things you can do with letting go, but how do you do it you may ask. Well, you have to follow a guided meditation process. You have to replay the experiences that taught you that it's not okay to to just flow with your actions and to let loose, to be loud, expressive, and the most important thing is to focus on sensations associated when you're replaying them. I record myself talking about the memory and giving cues to remember it and relive it, and when I listen to the recording afterwards, I focus on the associated sensations. When you fully feel the associated sensations, they will go away. You don't want to make them go away, though, you have to just sit back, feel them fully and they will leave on their own. Can take seconds, can take weeks of doing it over and over, but eventually, the sensations will clear out and all associated emotions and thoughts will go away. Overthinking too. Overthinking is basically a compulsive response to pain and trauma. You just being present hurts therefore you always have to be escaping with the mind, it could be mild or it could be more serious. Also just not having a concept of what is important and letting your mind wonder increases it. Awareness of sensations and seeing thoughts arise in real time stops it because you can disengage a thought as it arises by observing it. Realizing you're not your thoughts is also another way to stop it, but you have to have let go of the underlying trauma to have it engrained in you. I remember vividly I was once in the car with my family and I was in my little world introverted whatever and at one point from all the meditation and letting go the pain just ran out, I felt a neutral feeling in my body and the thinking just stopped, like the compulsive overthinking, and I became in control instead. It took a while to get used to, you'll want to go back but you physically can't. It's like you're above it now, you toggle the thinking on and off, it's not running you. You're not an 'overthinker' anymore. You're just present awareness that's like a laser, it just knows, gets to the value quickly without jumping through all these hoops. You can let go of social anxiety, fear of being loud, limiting beliefs, insecurities, not being good enough, traumatic experiences, some people even fix OCD. You will feel amazing, I'm talking literally feeling high where you see colors and stuff without substances. Not an exaggeration. I really recommend you try this and anyone who reads this. There's this guy on RU-vid that does it and is all about it: @JulienHimself. I learned it from him and it's changed my life, I was the shiest little loser and now I'm just crazy confident, I say whatever I want, I can be loud or quiet, not worry at all what people are thinking, or at least way less than before, strangers definitely not, I'm still not perfect though I'm on my journey but this is the stuff that works for good. Again, highly recommend this and I hope you see it, or anyone scrolling through here. Also a little disclaimer, any piece of advice can help you or hurt you, there is a dark side to this if you abuse it, it can be hard to re-engage thinking if you're not actively thinking. Remember, it puts you in control and when you're used to it being on autopilot you're not gonna want to engage it or it will feel a little uncomfortable doing so. Do it anyway. Also you're gonna feel completely different feelings as you're dissolving emotional addictions in your body so you're gonna have to get used to like a new pair of emotional clothes essentially, that might be oversize. Proceed if you're ready of a complete transformation. I went from an insecure serious boring adult-wannabe computer nerd to an outgoing expansive carefree childish personality, that is inside everyone. You're born expansive and carefree, conditioning happens and you're creating a shell over time. The beauty is you're creating the shell and you can remove it and stop. Doesn't mean you have to always be carefree, you can choose to be an intellectual, but the next second be a complete kid. Nothing is off limits, you just regain what you've lost as you've been conditioned, personally I'm a computer programmer, I am the last person you'd think would be a computer programmer judging from the external side alone after all the inner work (a little bit is still there, I wear glasses and can have a neckbeard sometimes lol but I own it, I don't have shame around it, but it's like when I open my mouth it's like not a programmer is talking), however I would've completely fit that stereotype before. This is a bit all over the place but I hope you understand.

Just started watchin this...know for sure iss gonna be 11/10

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us, it’s always a pleasure to listen! I love watching the process of completing different parts of this painting in different videos :)

In my personal experience of becoming a more social person I really resonate with the "observer" idea and I think that eventually you kind of end up putting yourself in that mindset without even realizing it and I truly feel that that is a major role in becoming an extrovert. Just kind of letting your mind almost play the game of life on its own is really something that differentiates a person who over thinks from someone who talking to others comes easy to.

This is really relaxing. I hope to see more videos when you are talking and painting at the same time. ❤

I wait alot for your videos . Your content is creative and unique Elizabeth ♥️

Wut I love how she's just casually painting this awesome painting! Subscribed 😄

Old is always gold, it's one of the Amazing painting❤❤❤❤❤

One thing i learn from my individual in society class is about the spotlight affect and also illusion transparency. So the spotlight affect is believing that other people are paying attention to us more than they are. Everybody believe the spot light is on them, but in the middle of our world it actually us that the centre of our world. So that the same as everyone else so no need to be too conscious or retrain.

What people think of me is not my business. It is my business to do my best. Elizabeth, you are obviously doing your best. You are beautiful. Beyond that, you are wonderful. Your videos have me reading books more. Just sitting and reading is difficult. I am still in training to do that.

Thank you, Elizabeth! 😄 Your advice was really helpful. Also, you’re very talented at painting!

The way you explained everything with your own life examples, *chef’s kiss*

First one to comment just before watching video. I can surely say it will be an awesome podcast. 🤩 Lots of love Lizz 🥰

This resonated with me a lot, at least I know I am not alone! I go through very similar thought processes. Loved this vlogmas :)

2022 - you need your own podcast!!

Everything you have said....make so much sense from a CBT point of view. I have truly learned more than I bargained for when started watching your video. Thank you, you inspired me, helped me.....

Your artistic skills are amazing. How did you learn this? Please do more talks whilst painting. Thank you for inspiring us :)

Woahhh woahhhhh you’re super smart, in medical school, absolutely gorgeous (you look like lana del Rey) AND YOURE AND AMAZING ARTIST!!!!! Some people are just blessed with the whole package….. life’s not fair 😫

Omgg the part where she spoke about uni and friends completely explains my situation! Sadly it affects my work ethic because I do well when I have people around me which brings my very competitive trait and pushes me to do well in school, however the lack of close people around me in uni has had a greater toll than expected on my grades😕

Bravo! Great topic! Beautifully presented! Love your tips! I wish I knew them when I was younger! It would have helped me immensly!

I have always wondered why don't you do these podcasts videos on your main channel I'm happy you finally did it 😍

Well, I just came there by curiosity right before going to bed, then I started listening to the story where I could recognize myself and then got hypnotized by the painting which was slowly ending... Awesome throughs, you seem like a very interesting person with an endless culture and references !

You are so aware of life and human foibles that you have saved my soul from falling off a cliff.

I really enjoyed this video. Gave me vibes that seem halfway between a podcast and Ali's code with me streams. Have you ever considered doing any streams of you painting while taking some questions from viewers?

Dear Elizabeth, your ideas resonate a lot, Im literally having these insights while watching your video Thank you 💜

that video went straight to my heart, thank you !

Elizabeth, I don’t think I understand what your were saying about the priest. Someone just doesn’t go to a church and become a priest, neither does one just think I am a priest and just be one. Most religions have different processes, but the most common ones are similar. You get a bachelors degree in religious studies, then you do an internship as a deacon, then the church gives you an ordination if they agree you met the qualifications. And in fact it is a piece of paper that says your a priest. I agree that sometimes you have to look at yourself in the third person. I often say that my future self will finish this task (like a large clean-up job), or I will see how I get through a particular situation in the future.

"I am the observer of the person who lives my life". Wow. 🤯

I can't believe that you are an introvert. I have so many ideas for RU-vid channels and videos but being the introvert that I am, I don't get started.

Very interesting and most of all brave, Elizabeth!

Fantastic video. I'm also inspired to get back into painting myself :) Thank you so much!

such a new window you opened to my mind now. thank you

I enjoyed listening to you. Life definitely juggles with us. Best to remain flexible n open. I'm really wanting to share my story with impartial intelligence. Made some notes but I literally have books of information and it's all fairly unbelievable.

we are very similar Elizabeth , I think I am quiete happy to be like you even if we are overthinking people

It's nice to know that i'm not the only one that relies on derealization as a last resort for social situations xD This video reminds me of the saying "Cogito ergo sum", which means, "I think, therefore I am." This makes sense as our thoughts towards a situation makes up our emotions which contributes to our action, or the outcome, which I learned in therapy lol I don't know if you do this, but I feel bad when I don't do something that was talked about in a therapy session. Not the therapist, but me. I definitely agree of the act first think later mentality because I see it as something more reliable than having to analyze yourself over and over again, only to get stuck in regret and overthinking. I love learning about myself and overanalyzing, but it shouldn't LITERALLY handicap me from talking to people, especially since I KNOW that it is fine and that I am okay and that I am safe, you know? I think I really needed this video to remind me that is okay not to revolve around the personality I boxed myself into, especially when it comes to going after things that involve discomfort.

First of all thank you for such a great informative ideas. I really enjoy your work. Thank you.

Omg ur art is so beautiful!looks amazing!! And ur too beautiful to be insecure.. love ur new mic 🎤

Excellent job 👌🏻 Greetings from Scotland 😊 Have a wonderful day everyone 🌻

Obviously your confidence is really amazing. Keep it up😃👍❤

Elizabeth, I think some research into the field of spirituality would really enlighten you. (pun intended lol) In my humble opinion, your mindset and philosophy is already leaning very much into that direction. And since it seems that you are very eager to expand your knowledge constantly, I think the topic of spirituality would suit you very well. Because, you see, spirituality steps that game up one "meta"-step and aims at expanding your whole consciousness. It's actually very nerdy stuff and I think you would love it. :)

Ohh this came at a perfect time since I just impulsively decided to put myself more out there with dating in 2022 lol wish me luck

Thank you

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, it was helpful, I love your painting it was initially difficult to concentrate on your words because of it lol

Thank you Elizabeth

Beautiful painting!

Yes, idol. You are right. Thank you. You can't. your pronunciation is all right. It makes me learn. There is no misunderstanding. I believe you, because you are very beautiful

Well, we have to understand that our hostess's beauty helps her be confident. People will tend to defer to her more, listen to her for a longer time, and seek out her company, more than they would the rest of us who are average-looking.

I'm socially awkward and anxious in general in my 20s. It's so difficult to find a decent job, nice friends or even speak to the doctors

Amen sister I overthink everything and a introvert but not as intelligent

It's not too late. Change it to correct, and you won't be wrong in the future

Nice upload. I am a really different person so this is really helpful.

Please do videos about your process of learning art by yourself.

This is helpful as an introvert aswell ! Have you ever done the mbti test ?

Thanks fili

Clicked this thinking it'd be one of your more scripted ToTheCamera style videos, but enjoyed this candid, chatty style. In general side-chats are great, and definitely something different? The kind that only emerge alongside doing something else? (See also: drive chats, playing game chats etc) I respect your level of personal insight! And proactive acts of change. I think the overall Vibe that I enjoy in these kind of YT videos is of possibility and growth and change? But grounded in specifics and personal experience? Who knows! Anyway thanks!

The painting is a masterpiece 👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌

We 'become' nothing. It is a myth-word. We are what we discover . We have been born with everything but few discover what they are. When and what we discover, we become the same. Maybe it is just awakening or realization. Great job as ever, Alpha.

Elizabeth is a genius

Man , you have a such sweeet voice , and damn that painting :)

You inspire a lot!

👩‍🦰🎙This was taken from my podcast, which might be up your street if you enjoyed listening to my ramble! ru-vid.com/show-UC5NsPe2poaBRA0IPdTxJTQA

Elizabeth !Aaah what can I say!! I honestly like to watch ur channel, from Morocco, and like ur style in introducing ur videos, keep it up! مواضيعكِ شَيِّقة وأسلوبكِ زادَها رَوعةً (Translate it 😊)

I love ❤❤❤the couple they are so cute. You're incredibly talented keep going.

Liz, if that makes you feel better, I totally blushed when I met you :D. It was partially the beer but also just embarrassment haha.

Your channel is really inspiring :)

I love you Elizabeth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love the audio quality

Oh fine good artist

Nice day, great painting :)

I was surprised, how could you do both painting and talking at the same time? I cannot multi task at all.

I believe that extroverts enjoy extroverts. And that’s why it’s harder to be social. It’s forcing your natural self to fit a really high energy output and it’s weird and uncomfortable and other people who are just naturally extroverted see that and don’t vibe well with you.

She is so beautiful 😍😍😍❤️

Helpful vid, will keep me going with my vids :)

"Human action" my favourite book on economy,do you read economy ? Or more catallactics oriented subjects?

thank you very much love you

how can you paint and talk about subject like that :o I am impress

Very inspiring and interesting video.

Cognitive defusion is what you’re talking about when you mention depersonalisation btw - it’s talked about in acceptance and commitment therapy :)

How don't you obsess over completing this painting?🤔 Because when I get anywhere near finishing something, I get obsessed and leave everything else until I finish that thing.

I think you might be an ENFP, which makes you technically an extrovert. I say technically because introversion/extroversion in mbti is not the same as what is socially understood in normal language as intovert and extrovert.

From Brasil 🇧🇷😊 beautiful painting

If my son's future partner is like you, how happy and lucky🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤❤❤💋💋🤩🤩😊😊👍💋🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟🍟💗👌💓

i take your point in the example about becoming a priest...but don't priests need to be ordained (by the bishop) before they are officially a priest?