This is it. This is the sign. I'm turning 25 in a month. Dropped out of college in 6 years ago due to anxiety and depression. Never had a job since. Locked myself in my room for those years. Caused so much pain to my parents. This is it. I'll dedicate this month looking for a job as a first step of sorting my life out. Wish me luck.
22 dropped out of uni bcuz of anxiety related issues,working my way back into being a competent fully functional juggernaut of a man,see you there brother 💪🏾
All the best buddy.. don't feel bad about dropping out of school or anything.. I experienced the same.. believe me when you give yourself a shot.. you'll see how far you can leap.. go as far as you can, dream big.. I wish you the best
I'm 25 now, found Jordan Peterson about 5 years ago. Being a young guy, without a father and living in a rather poor neighbourhood, I found myself being depressive, lacking a job and any higher education. Now, 5 years later, I can proudly say that I have finished my degree in Computer Science, work as a Software Engineer, got engaged and live with my soon-to-be wife. Thank you Jordan for everything.
How did you manage to afford the higher education, had a similar upbringing and battling to get a decent job currently without a degree while my friends are cruising into higher paying jobs due to having one it seems?
@@stevensseagull If you are interested in Computer Science that's your best bet to get a high-paying job without a degree. Make a plan for yourself, watch videos, read some good books, and make sure you structure your learning in a dedicated way rather than just going through it. If you do all this successfully you can get a 70-100k/yr job with no degree within probably about 8-10 months. However, if it's not something you're passionate about, you'll never be able to do it, especially if you have another job as it's something you'll have to do in addition to whatever you're currently doing. In that case I would try and find a certain niche that you're interested in and push hard at it, then you can maybe find an employer who will pay for your tuition or you can get a scholarship. On a completely separate note, there are a lot of trades out there (plumbing, woodworking, electricians) that are terribly underemployed, so if you can find someone who will mentor you that's a great way to earn 200-250k/yr after a decade or so with no degree. The carpenter who works on my house is always going on about how he wishes he could find someone to train, so maybe if you just go into a couple of those kind of businesses and ask if they're looking for someone who wants to learn you might have a decent shot. Good luck man I wish you the best!
He's either a father figure or a divine figure. I for one am certainly glad to have found him. How many people here found out about JP from Andrew Klavan? BLESSED BE THE DAY! FOR THE GOOD DOCTOR HAS SHONE HIS LIGHT ON MINE EYES. THOU HAST MOST GRACIOUSLY LINTED THE SEED OF MY CLOTH! PARFIRI PETRI ET NUMENUM. Amen brothers and sisters.
You don't like my biblebabble? I thought it was okay, a lot of gibberish for sure. I'll have to work on it more. Thine lord in canada, peace be in his name. For thine hast thou giveth lord wherefore hath upon.
hit the nail on the head. i always knew all the right wing culture warrior babbies wanted is a cool dad to pat them on the back and say 'its alright skip, dont worry about those shrill SJWs, just buy my book and lets go out back and throw the ole pigskin around'
There are things you can’t overcome. To be like Peterson now, you need several generations slowly working towards. Look at your accomplishments by added value to your family tree. Sort yourself out by accepting your limits and just try to guide your children grow over you. Jesper Juul is the man to read or listen to know best how to guide children better than you were guided. Naturally when you read Juul you will find out everything you learnt from Peterson will help you tremendously.
This really makes him human and makes us realize that even at the lowest of places, anyone can strive and become better versions of themselves. Thank you Sir, for sharing this part of your life to us.
When I turned 25 in July I checked myself into a rehab 3 days later I am 169 days sober today and my life is starting to get better I’m working a decent job with benefits and have meaningful friendships/relationships now I know it will take time to undo a lot of the damage I’ve done but I’m working on it and couldn’t be prouder of myself
Thats admirable! You probably know already but just to let others know, addictions stick for life, it's a war and you are dominating! Just don't ever let yourself "that one drink" or "only one beer" Now You are a man that DOES NOT DRINK, that's who you are, and that who you should stay, be proud of that, peace.
This video found me at the right time it seems. Turning 26 in November and right now I'm in a state where I'm basically just over-indulging in everything. Can't stop drinking crap that's bad for me, can't stop eating crap that's bad for me, my libido is absolutely out of control and I'm just diving into porn and sexual persuits basically every single day. My entire existence for the past month has been focused on desire-fullfillment, and I realise this and I'm not happy about it. It's like the hedonistic, deviant, degenerate and perverted 10% of my mind has become 90% of my focus, which is wrong and absurd for obvious reasons. It's just 10% of my being yet it's so intense lately it dominates my life. Unacceptable. I don't need inspiration from a video to get my shit together, but it's always good to know someone you value as a source of wisdom and intellectual discourse has overcome similar issues. We always KNOW what we need to do and we always KNOW that it all comes down to us but fucking up is too easy and I've always taken the easy way out. Just gotta really put my foot down and stop the destructive behaviour. Stop the drinking. Stop the over-eating. Stop the partying. Stop projecting sexual thoughts and fantasies onto every God damn thing. Stop being a dumbass, basically. I'm gonna drop this shit cold Turkey. Had enough. Feeling so trash physically and mentally I can barely think straight and obsess over nonsense. I'm done. Let's hope I can pull up my mental bootstraps and good luck to everyone else who is trying to get right.
I was in similar position a year ago , lethargic and unmotivated on the same negative self destructive spiral, I could not get out of it no matter how hard I tried, I turned to Christ to give me an ABSOLUTE foundation mindfulness 'Take up your cross and meet me at your own Golgotha in the crucifixion of your 'EGO' to 'sort yourself out'. 'Take up your cross and follow me' I said 'If I keep doing this sordid masturbation, bad living and sexual fantasy projection, IT WILL kill my spiritual 'self'' i had just recently discovered at the depths of depression. Since then I have had no compulsion or any controlling desire. I pay for the years doing this each moon cycle with 'sordid dreams' of sexual fantasies, but they are decreasing. but during the day no 'desire' whatsoever BECAUSE of my absoluteness in my abstinent no joking around seriousness approach. Key is learning what and how the 'EGO' works against you and to 'crucify' it through intense self - knowledge daily. To become 'aware' and not be a pinball to the 'EGO'. Know thy self, have an absolute 'point' of 'potential' attainment and carefully without serious 'expectation' but slowly work towards it.
I wish you luck! Almost feeling a little guilty for not having any of these kinds of problems, turning 20 in a month. Well, actually my problem is that I'm not conscientious enough toward my own projects, could use some of that JBP's obsessiveness he talked about here. :D
At 25... My life changed too... all the stuff I told myself I would do since 16-18 years... I STARTED DOING THEM. Made a Routine for it. Nothing is perfect, I could probably be more ''in shape and more efficient'' but I dont let the ''maybe/could be bother me''.... cause I know... Since 25years old... the past 3 years have been BETTER/Stronger/Improvement at ALL LEVEL. I am finally becoming the MAN I dreamed to be... it's all action. I started slow at 25 years old and been building momentum since... (started at 1 pushup x 6.... now over 25 x 6)... studied 30 minutes after work.. now at 2 hours after work every day.... 1h30 gym, 8hours work,2 hours study, 2 hours of ''leisure (cooking included'', a bit of dancing a few times a week, sleep early, wake up early... A new man.... some times I slip but I get back eventually. Overall... I am ABOVE and much more disciplined and focused, sorted out compared to previous 25 years old of life...The child died, the man grew up
I hope that all of you who are: about 25, graduated with bachelor's, not very social yet, and feeling sorry for yourself, are still grateful for the position you're in. I didn't start sorting myself out until I was 23 years old. Now I'm 26, and although I feel like I've discovered my purpose and what brings meaning to my life, it's a long road ahead of me and I won't have my bachelors degree until 29. If there's one thing I've learned along the way it's just to let go of self-pity. It's only holding you back.
Some are... "Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth." 2 Timothy 3:7! WHY? Because they leave JESUS out! "Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by Me." John 14:6! Time is winding up. All we have is time to live for JESUS! The LORD will give you a PhD if that's the desire of your heart. "Delight thyself also in the LORD; and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart." Psalm 37:4! Stipulation? Find all you need in JESUS! Delight thyself! 💓💓💓
Find your brains patterns. You know what habits you'd like to get rid of in your life. So when you see yourself about to indulge the desire to carry out the habit - FREEZE. Observe, notice your emotional state, notice the beliefs that are attached to the emotional state. After a short but meaningful amount of time unfreeze and immediately go do another activity - anything else at all. Eventually you'll find yourself becoming more and more productive the more you freeze, observe, and reactivate.
@@raiezy Still going strong. More experienced since the last time I wrote this comment. Put myself in uncomfortable situations. I'd say I'm a little less naive and have grown up a little. 😄
Not lying in a relationship is definitely the way to go. Learned this the hard way. Losing a meaningful relationship is hard, losing your best friend is almost unbearable.
@@marcelm-meatstatues8207 that's because you don't value your relationships lmao, you'll drop them like a bat for the next one instead of working on it. That's not really being capable of love. Literally, indifference is the opposite of love. Same way not valuing something means no conflict. If two different things are valued there's conflict, add indifference and there's no conflict. You clearly don't value your partners, what are they F objects? Moving on from a relationship also doesn't mean indifference, that's worse than valuing it and moving on (unless it was a horrid relationship)
This video was so beautiful and up-lifting. I love that he married his childhood sweetheart. Hearing him describe himself as manic in some ways really makes me feel less ashamed of my own manifestations of mania. Thanks for sharing :)
Glad you could get over your addiction. I'm currently fighting an alcohol addiction and I am probably at the lowest point in my life. I am determined I will get sober this time. Stay strong brother 👊
Amen to that! I'm 25 going on 26. Just got out of the hell last month. Hearing Jordan Peterson does help me alot to get back on the right track. Life still rough but i'm keep rolling forward. Best wishes!
I have so much respect for this man. I'm glad that university nonsense happened last year to bring his work and message to the attention of millions. God works in mysterious ways as they say. 1, Zuby
I probably sorted myself out at 17 when I took a hard look at who I was hanging out with, what I was doing, and where my trajectory was taking me. Then I decided that I was going to go to school far away from where I lived to intentionally break all the bonds I had formed to start fresh. Never looked back. Never went to a high school reunion. Have not spoken with anyone I knew in high school (aside from family). Best decision I ever made.
The hardest problem is getting away from the toxic people in your life. You either have to run away, or wait for them to die if they are older than you. Some friends you can't just cut ties with because they may be in a worse off position than you in terms of mentally. But if you wait, your spirit may be dead by then from having to deal with those people on a daily basis. The worst part about these kinds of problems at least for me is that there isn't really anyone you can reach out to. sure I can sit here an watch Jordan Peterson, but he doesn't even know I exist. the key I think maybe is finding someone who has true sympathy for you and similar interests. Finding that person, or people, before you try to end the loneliness is a problem.
same. I'm 17 right now and I can firmly say I've gotten myself on the right path. I was always the quiet kid, but i hanged out with people who toxic to my life. My GPA was a 2.7 sophomore year, and now I have a 3.8 (in my junior year). At the start of this school year I weighed 133 but I have gained 25 pounds. There's so many improvements I have made within a short period of time. You just have to let go of everything and grab life by the neck.
It hurts a lot and for the most part and it's not the people. It's the time you've wasted. You can always get friends back but time is constantly drifting away. In regards to the people, since I've witnessed my own progression the last place I want to be is with those people. Try to make new friends (like chuck said) and get involved with something (maybe your community). The more, "free time" you have the more you'll ponder on mistakes you have made. It is a complete waste of time.
I'm so proud of all of you. You're working on yourselves even when it's tough and helping out your fellow man in the process. I've seen so many people in the comments giving advice to others and it just warms my heart. You're what men should be (from a female perspective): hard-working, kind, and strong. I love all of you.
true, it would be better more people were here. Society messed us all up pretty good. I'm glad so many are still fighting, struggling instead of quitting life in general.
This came at the perfect time, Most times it amazes me greatly how I moved from an average lifestyle to earning over $63k per month, Utter shock is the word. I have understood a lot in the past few years that there are lots of opportunities in the financial market. The only thing is to know where to invest.
I agree with you and I believe that the secret to financial stability is having the right investment ideas to enable you earn more money, I don’t know who agrees with me but either way I recommend either real estate or bitcoin and stocks.
@Peter Moore That won't bother you if you trade with a professional like *Mr Gary Mason Brooks* my coach, you may have come across him on interviews relating to bitcoin and stocks. He trades, manage trading account and offer mentorship program for clients who wish to become professional investors..
Wow I can't believe you guys are discussing about Gary Mason Brooks , I once met him at a conference in California 2019, just before the pandemic. I can testify that he’s very good in trading..Highly recommended
@@susanhaynes679 This is the Fourth time I'm seeing someone talking about Mr Gary as there are lot of testimonies about him, do you know him ? if yes , did you invest with him?
@@zombie15ish Yes i do, I've known him for couple of years, I'm still using his services, His management team is quite impressive so far. With my $5,000 deposit, I made over $288,000 profit with just 10% charge.
I wish Jordan Peterson became popular at another time. He has so much helpful knowledge to impart on so many people, and it's truly a shame he's been painted as a controversial figure. There are so many people struggling with alcohol abuse in the early 20s and it really hinders one's potential when the brain is still forming. Plus he's one of the most generally wise people I've come across in my many hours of being in and watching lectures from decorated professors.
Sigma I agree, but I also would have benefitted greatly from his advice 4 years ago. I just now am watching his lectures after life had already forced me to learn 90% of the lessons he preaches and basically just watch him to hear someone agree with my own ideology.
I'm a therapist, and I'm primarily listening to his lectures on mental health and treatment. When I first listened to him, I noticed we conceptualize behavior in a similar way, typically reaching to the biological hardware that our consciousness is built upon. Very cool dude, and I hope he doesn't let the limelight pull him away from actually treating mental health instead of moving to solely commentating on the state of affairs.
Modern society wants to keep men docile and placated. Modern feminism wants to keep men on a leash and to treat them like obedient dogs. Is it any wonder why someone with even a modicum of common sense is seen as controversial in this day and age.
This guy is just amazing. I’m 26 and feel like I’m so behind my peers in every sense of the word adulting but I’m glad I found his videos. I really want to begin the journey of turning my shit around, seems so daunting but I’d rather keep trying and failing over again then to not even try at all.
I'm there with you, pal! But we can do this, if we invest ourselves in it. Let's create the best version of ourselves and try first and foremost. Not trying means defeat!
(January 2022): One thing that’s remarkable about Peterson is that he’s had a burning passion since he was a teenager. He found his purpose early in life and he pursued it. Difficult sacrifices were made, but it was destined to happen with such a strong sense of self. I hope I can follow in his example with whatever road I may take. I turn 18 in June and I’m already reading and taking notes on many pieces of literature and loving it. I think that may be my purpose in life as well. We shall see. In 10 years, I’ll edit this post and give an update. I myself am curious to see where I’ll end up! (March 2022): Glad to see the support, thank you very much :) I was just accepted to University of Arizona Honors College as well!
+delivery thrust 140 pounds = 64kg im sorry are you trolling? A short male or a kid has that weight and no with that weight you will not have the strenght to bench 100kg
I’m 27, about to be 28. I started to feel almost as if I had peaked. My hunger for knowledge and challenges almost seemed to disappear. Peterson has helped me realize that it’s not too late.
I’m in the same boat. 28, got a lot of things figured out in my life but feel like something is missing. Been working to go back to school and challenge myself again. Hope you find the challenge you need and keep that hunger for knowledge alive and well
lol those are nice interpretation skills... sorting yourself out means to stop doing that which makes your life worst and start moving towards your self defined goals in life
People think that only youth is the time of personal mess that needs to sort out. Yet, personal drama is excused if not sympathized when you're over thirty.
As a 25 year old who knows there’s more to life than what I’m doing now, this is great. I often sway back and forth between, oh wow I’m still young and wow other people at 25 have accomplished so much. I guess life is a constant state self-improvement. JBP is a brilliant male role model.
Going to be 24 this year, recovered from 3 and half years of intense cocaine, meth, and pharmaceutical addiction. I've been clean now for almost 8 months, and will be going back to school to finish my bachelors as quick as possible. It's late in the game, but now that I'm no longer in the state that I was while constantly on drugs (working 50 hours a week, staying up 13 or more days straight); I feel like my mental health has changed dramatically. Thanks to a lot of decisions, and realizations in the past 8 months my depression and anxiety are no longer daily struggles. I've spent a good deal of time in the past 3 months studying, and preparing for the upcoming semester. One thing I'm most happy about is my conscious awareness, and becoming involved in what's going on around me, and being in tough situations willfully that will have rewarding outcomes. One thing I do while studying is listen to some of Jordan Peterson's lectures or interviews because I feel focusing on what I'm doing or the task at hand through some apparent distraction, helps me to ensure my grasp and understanding of the information I'm processing. People used to ask how I could study with the music blaring, and still manage to do well in school.
JESUS said... "Receive ye the Holy Ghost:" John 20:22b! KJV Therein is your POWER over sin! HOLY GHOST is "New Wine!" JOY UNSPEAKABLE and FULL of GLORY! 💓 (See 1 Peter 1:8!)🙏🙌 "But ye shall receive power after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you:" Acts 1:8a! KJV
Wow. I'm 25, i was alchoholic, drinked 2 years non stop. But now month ago i quit drinking and begin to training and work with my self sobatage, impulsive, hedonistic character.
25 was a wake up call for me too. I realized and decided I needed to focus on more important things in life and less time on things such as video games. It's about finding a balance and there needs to be sacrifice. One has to get out of their comfort zone and work on things they've been avoiding or putting off. Tomorrow comes quick so seize today and make it count.
This is it. I am 22.5 yrs old recently graduated from Tier 4 college. No job, skinny, ugly, No skill, Smoker, porn Addictor, Social Anxious, Depresses, lazy, procastinator, Day dreamer , VIRGIN or More.. I wasted all my school and college years in Day dreaming and procastinating.. But Now I will change my life and whatever I have to become the Respected, Honourable version of myself. That version That I can proud of my age 25 . * I will Join gym and Remove the tag of skinny and ugly. * I will crack upsc exam. * I will talk to people, make friends. * No fap
Failed an exam eight times because of my mental health and i was on a severe survival mode. dropped out of university two times because of anxiety. Don't have the finance to afford therapy. Being a topper to dropper, failure - sitting on the bottom of the well. I don't think i can get any lower than this. 26, without graduation or a job. Hurted my parents multiple times with my failures . But thank you for the heart warming comments, i will make sure it doesn't happen again. it's nice and comforting to know i am not alone. I think we should speak more about our insecurities, anxiety and mental health to break through this idea of 'perfect life'. There are many like me, who got lost since they hit their late teens. It has been scary for all of us. Going to start off with learning investment, get a job and crack that medical school entrance exam in 9th time. Also going to get that 88 kgs to 63 kgs because my weight and PCOS is really playing with my self image.
Dropped out of university back in 2017. due to anxiety, panic attacks and general depression. Tried college again a year later in 2018. , the same thing happened. I locked myself in even more until around 2020. I started going to a psychologist. It helped at first. I even got some medication. Even found a girlfriend for a few months. Tried to work, but only lasted for 3 days due to anxiety. It all went bad again. Locked myself in again. Then tried uni for the 3rd time in 2022. and I broke again. Now it's going to be the summer of 2023. I'm 25 years old, no degree, job or girlfriend. I've started going to the gym for the past few weeks. I have gained a lot of weight due to bad habits and staying in all the time. I hang out more and more with my friends. Some of them understand my situatuon, some of them don't. Don't know what or how my life will be going. My parents are getting older and I'm worried what I will do. I have caused them too much pain. The sadness is sometimes unberable. I'm not sucidal, but don't know how it wil be in a few years if nothing changes. I recently went to the same psychologist again. Don't know if it helps. Only thing that helps a bit is praying...
Keep praying...take it one day at a time, one thing at a time. focus on the things you can control and focus less on things you can't control. You're gonna be okay bro....everybody goes through this things in their 20's.
@@jackedpreacher6570I’m 23 about halfway thru my degree and have been worried sick about applying for job interviews and what kind of money I will be making starting out. The best thing is to take small steps to improve yourself. Getting yourself out there may help a lot, look into doing some volunteer work it’s easy to get into and will help you get your foot in the door. I just started doing some on the weekends while in school and after 2 shifts I’ve learned a lot already
I am also 25, I am praying for you, you are not alone. God loves you! Everyone is doing life for the first time so don’t be so hard on yourself. Life is a miracle
I'm 25 now and recently started watching these videos. I dropped out of school, been an alcoholic and a cocaine addict and yet within the course of 5 months I've been hitting the gym hard for around 3 months, I've managed to stay sober and I've avoided all my "friends" that only ever called to get wasted. I've gotten myself a job and unfortunately I still live with a parent, but I'm determined. The only thing I have left to do is quit smoking, take more hours at work and get myself out of here where I can be at peace and focus. Even if that means starting with nothing but an empty house and food. Thank you for the advice and the perspective. The drive is almost making me grit my teeth. Love from UK!
Can you help me with the part where you said "I've managed to stay sober and I've avoided all my "friends" that only ever called to get wasted." They are the only friends whome I talk to and meet almost every day. They are with me since school and are nice and good to me. It's just they don't wanna quit smoking and getting high. And at this time I don't have any other friends. What should be done? Any advice anyone please?
@@Saudagar420 Well just because your friends are doing it, it doesn't mean you should too. The only reason I disposed of my friends was because they weren't supportive, didn't inspire me and didn't seem to care for my well-being. If your friends do care and are supportive in your endeavours, by all means keep them close but you're going to have to be assertive and have self discipline in order to stick by yourself and not smoke or part take in the bad things they do! I wish you all the best in figuring it out :)
Can you help me on the part “i got myself a job.” My question is that the job that you really love doing it? I resigned from my job because i know this is not the job for me and i hated it. I am always in tears of pain everytime i go to that workplace dealing with clients and contractors, and my superiors aren’t there to help me out. I’m in a spiral of self-blame and anxiety so I got out to work. Now my parents are forcing me to go to work, but i Hate it because i have that PTSD.
@@carltasticdrew9633 I don’t believe I’ve ever liked any line of work I’ve been in unfortunately buddy. I started off as a Chef at 16, at 23 I swapped to wholesale food sales and lifted sacks of potato’s onto pallets as a warehouse operative for two years, tore my shoulder muscle clean off my bone on the left side, as of now I’m up-cycling bicycles and what not and selling them at boot sales with my father. No where near as glorious but it pays money at about a fraction of the labour. Work smarter not harder ey? I’m 26 now.
I started to put myself together with 22. At the time I thought that was somewhat too late, but now I can see CLEARLY that I had to spent some years doing things severely and extreme wrong to have some background when I measure what is a good or a bad life
My God.... So my life isn't a total mess, just turned 26, got my bachelors degree this past November. Got a 10 hour, well paid job recently. But really need to stop being so neurotic, be more disciplined and social. Particularly the social aspect, but I do not know how to start with that one.
Sounds similar to me, 23 in novemeber and struggling to finish getting my bachelors due to a complete lack of motivation. Discipline and sober social skills are below average and I'm as neurotic as Woody Allen. My favourite type of procrastination is the one where I'm thinking about how I would reform society so that my laziness wouldn't be punished as bad. When it comes to the social aspect I'm far from pro but I find that ever since I've started caring less about it, it goes much better. Once you are able to remind yourself that you're not the center of the universe things will improve. This doesn't mean that you have to become a nihilist. All it is supposed to do is to add some perspective to your particular perception of life. I imagine that similar to me you don't enjoy small talk. Good. You don't have to. But it is a social lubricant. With a little bit of small talk you can engage in a deeper conversation with anyone*, just ask the right questions and you'll get them to talk about stuff that won't make you want to leave the room. Get to know what your conversation partner is passionate about and you're set. There's something about listening and looking at a person that's expressing his or her passion. My social circle is also quite small but I find that being friends with a guy that knows more helps a ton. Through him I got to meet this girl that I started messaging recently and she just invited herself for dinner at my home so I can show her my cooking that I joked about. That caught me by surprise... Part of me is excited and the neurotic and irrational part of me is thinking that this must be some elaborate joke on my expense. But if a clueless fool like me can make steps towards a better social life then so can you. Congratulations on the job, 50 more years to go and you'll be free. But since we both have long slavery ahead of us I'd suggest you put some of your hard-earned money to improving your social skills on the weekends. Best of luck to you, you're not alone *almost anyone
When you're afraid of something you have to force yourself to walk towards it. Every time you run away it gets easier to run the next time. Also, shit can't be too bad If you've got a degree (without a huge amount of debt.) As far as social goes though I'm kinda silly. I'm incredibly charismatic around total strangers, but have trouble making and talking to real friends.
Social is actually quite simple, but not necessarily easy. I have done it myself. It really is as simple as putting yourself out there and talking to people. The trick is, if you are quite bad at it, start with very easy ways of doing it. Join some hobby class or whatever where interaction is required to participate. Bam, you're talking to people, and it will be easy because it will be about that hobby mostly. From there its a matter of coming with a slightly bigger challenge, like talking to people in a bar, etc. A big trick about learning to socialize is this: usually you put too much attention on yourself, what I mean is you think about you, and what is happening to you, and how people react to you, too much. To avoid this, there are a few tricks: focus on other people. Actively engage your mind in this. LISTEN with full attention. Ask questions. Also, its not as much about what you say, its about listening and feeling other people, and engaging with them in a "sharing the fun, the conversation" attitude.
I already know that I seriously need to change my life for the better but I just don’t know how to do. I don’t seem to have that “spark” that everyone else does in life that drives them forward. There’s no light at the end of the tunnel for me. There’s not a single person on this planet that I can see myself becoming. Every day we have to eat a bowl of shit for breakfast, lunch and dinner - and most people have it in them to push through it for what’s on the other side. It just completely cripples me.
People aren't heroes, it's just a matter of time and an addition of little efforts, no more than this, you just have to tell this little anxious voice that pops off everytime you try something to shut the f up.
Feel bad for wasting all those years seeking for fun, jumping from a relationship to another and wasting my energy on destroing my body. I decided a few months ago that it was it. couldnt see my life going the way it was. I'm 24 now, greatefull for all those incredible minds that make us think that threre's always a way out and there's always self improvements to be achieved. Much love from brazil to anyone reading this!
Jordan Peterson is an uncommon man in a society that needs uncommon men. Men who are blunt and honest, judgmental too. We need to teach boys to be men, but our society is so against being judgmental and enforcing gender stereotypes and roles that our men are becoming weaker and so are our women. Our belief in the idea of love and tolerance has allowed us to tolerate weakness instead of helping to fix it and make us stronger. We tell our children what they want to hear, not what they need to hear. We give them what they want instead of what they need. We spoil them instead of teaching discipline. I'm no baby boomer, but I clearly recognize the flaws in much of common society. So, we need more uncommon men like Jordan Peterson. And we need them now.
Agreed. I do think that the love and tolerance is a generally good thing of our society. Like everything though, too much of it will lead to the world you describe. It's hard to grow from a boy to a man these days, sometimes it seems as though all of society would rather you be weak. Usually not in a contemptuous way, but as a temptation disguised as kindness. That's why children win participation trophies and never experience a hateful word in their lives, at least until they make it to the real world. I almost feel lucky to have had an unfortunate upbringing...
..are you talking about California society since the 60's ? The idea of people not viewing the raising of their children as a serious matter seems more than a little flippant to me. There is nothing tepid about it
Yep I think I did misunderstand. I read that as you making out that people who raise children don't treat it as a serious matter. Whereas you're actually saying that people are not taking the choice of giving birth/having a child as a serious matter as a result of the 60's etc. , right?
I’m 22 and I recently moved to a new city. It’s the first time being on my own- let alone outside of my hometown. Though I can’t say my life is great, I can’t say it’s horrible. I go to work every day, I’m trying to get myself back into college, and I finally have financial means to have my very own things. Despite this, I still feel a deep longing sadness within my heart that can’t be explained. My days seem to endlessly go on- and when it finally ends, the process repeats once again. I can’t say that I have friends, I did but more so in high school but now that I’m older, I genuinely find it hard to meet individuals who I can share a connection with. Most days I tell myself “You know?? I might go to a bar tonight or something like that, go outside and meet new people.” I’ve yet to do that but I’m hoping that I muster the courage soon because I feel lonely as ever.
Were meant to form strong bonds with people not work our entire lives. Its quite literally how our ancestors evolved and survived. Those that were ostracized and alone did not survive for very long and never procreated.
Please take that first step for your own sake man. And even if it doesn’t go as planned try again and again. That is what life is after all. The time I spent alone and sad I regret so much, so take it from me and put yourself out there as much as you can!
This channel isn't about philosophy if it has a focus on vilifying left leaning politics and SJWs. Now, I really love JP's contributions and I'm a serious fan, but I don agree with your agenda. Peace.
...the voice inflections, the smoking, your (teaching) profession (alas no chalk) makes me think you should get an advance screening for your larynx...
Fred Hampton's Ghost haha I take adderall on a daily basis and I never thought about what you just said but it's true to a certain extent. But I'm curious: what do you mean with "drain your soul"?
This guy is like a breath of fresh air. Its hard to talk about how you feel all the time, but if you have a family who love you and a few friends, anything is possible.
Watching this as a 26 yo, having quit drinking a year and a half ago and quit smoking around a year ago, I feel like I'm on the right path. Especially the part about not regretting it because I've come out of it with a great many tales!
If you started drinking at the age of 14 and went on to develop an IQ in excess of 150, does that mean that we should plough all our kids with alcohol?
Man, I´m so envious of him. I can´t even dream of achieving what he did at 25, and I´m 23 already. Feels like I got left behind in the race of becoming a truly respectable person.
True, but your IQ doesn´t mean shit if you haven´t learned to conduct yourself in the world properly. And that is the major issue! My IQ itself is pretty satisfying, but still I have good reason to fear for my future, because I didn´t start early enough to give a damn about it.
dude you're fuckin 23... your whole life is still ahead of you. When I was 23, I was shackin up in the ghetto with a big breasted welfare mom, walking 3 miles to work to make minimum wage. Now im 33 and I own my own home and business. You have plenty of time, but start now.
Wow. Started sorting myself out at the same time. Im 25 with one more semester of college left for my bachelors. Good thing to know Im not as late as I thought I was. I am so glad I found Jordan Peterson. He has helped me improve tremendously.
He is in his 50s and dealing with a xanax addiction... What the fuck do you mean he got his life together at 25? He will be 60 less than 5 years from now and he still doesn't have his life together today... So much for the clean your room shit.
I find it funny that he thinks that being a PhD student with 15 published papers at the age of 25 is not having it together. 99% of people will never come close to that. In comparison, a drinking and smoking problem seems relatively insignificant.
I mean he's in psychology where Freud dominated for years and is still worshipped and taught, in that field you can just make up anything and then wait years for maybe someone to replicate your study and realize it's all BS
@@murkythunder Not to mention the field is now majority women pushing feminist ideologue as fact and infested by the pharmaceutical companies selling solutions in a pill. Even pushing hormones on children to change sex, as if that will solve their serious mental problems (statistically majority will go on to commit suicide).
@@cattysplat Yes. Probably due to childhood trauma that leads them to become toxic and abusive towards their equally abuse partners as well as potential kids these people have. I hate it when people say 'Their sexuality doesn't affect you!' Because it does. Everyone in society needs one another and we have to find the solution to their problems and provide for them as well as feel the ramifications of their actions. I feel sympathy for them, but alot of them need to inprove their mental health. As the saying goes 'one bad apple spoils the bunch.'
@@murkythunder got my BA from UBC in psychology, which is the best PSYC faculty in the country. It’s far from being a soft science. In peterson’s era, things were less competitive and the bar for what’s considered “good science” was lower, but 15 papers by the end of grad school is plenty impressive. Don’t sleep on it. For the record, Freud hasn’t been the least bit relevant since the 1960s.
I I'm 25 years old think I'm doing pretty well I work 40 hours a week in a job I enjoy I bought my first home last year just work hard and good things will happen
Glad there’s plenty of people here around my age who by societal standards should have “made it” already. Lately, I've been talking myself into doing things first and then immediately doing it before I have the chance of talking myself out of doing it. A lot of people, including myself, have just gotten way too good at doing the latter. I've realized a lot of things aren't actually difficult or impossible. You just need to allow yourself the chance to make a consistent effort over a given period of time. Even better when, after having finished, you find yourself having bought more time to do even more things than if you had waited to do your initial task some other time. Also, exercise, sleep, and changes in diet have figuratively and literally made me feel like I’ve been reborn into a different body. I’d say to those reading this, you should try focusing on clearing your mind from toxicity, whether it be from other people or yourself, and then start grinding out all the other things little by little. As long as you don’t stop moving forward, you will see new paths open up, you’ll come across genuine people you never would have thought could exist in this world, and you’ll come to realize that the rainy days were necessary so that you could grow and help others grow.
Wow .....Truly one of the most articulate, relatable and awesome comments I have read in a while. Keep pushing forward brother, we gonna make it. Really made me reflect upon my life a bit deeper.
I'm bout to turn 19 this Dec 25, and I'm also kind of lost in my uncertain tragectory. I'm off porn, quit smoking and alcohol. The challenge for me right now is when do I start, the first step plausibly is the hardest one.
I was actually doing pretty well until I finished school. Had good grades (I won several awards, participated in maths and sports competitions for my school), a good social life, I spoke 5 languages and I had gotten in TU Delft: a top (Aerospace) engineering university. Sure, there were still some problems and things I wanted to improve. I was still immature, I stopped studying a lot when I was 17 and this affected my predicted grades (I did IB with Maths, Chem and Physics HL so you can't slack off) but I managed to pull myself together and achieve good final grades. In hindsight, my penultimate year of senior/high school was a massive red flag. I'd gotten in my first major relationship in December 2014 and I couldn't balance my life out anymore. Started drinking, going to parties and I'd hang out with my gf every weekend. I couldn't control myself. Anyway, I took my first year of uni at TU Delft too lightly and got kicked out because I was 1 exam short (roughly 50% of first years get kicked out - you need 45 credits out of 60 to pass the year). TU Delft was my dream university. It still is but it's too late now. That hurts. I stuck with Aerospace Eng and I chose to go to the Polytechnic University of Turin - not a bad uni in itself. This was in 2017. It's 2022 and I still need to get my bachelors. I started my Masters in September 2021 because I only needed to pass one more exam. I still haven't passed it. It's depressing. I'm depressed. I lost three of my grandparents in the last 2 years, my gf of 3 years dumped me and I haven't spoken to my dad in over a year. One of my friend's father just passed away a few weeks ago and it scares me. He is going to graduate in two weeks - life is really cruel. I already regret not studying enough because none of my grandparents will ever see me graduate. If only I had studied harder. I'm afraid the same thing can happen to my parents. Moving on, I want to graduate in september and complete 4 masters exams. I hope I can finish in December 2023, I'll work hard for it, I have to. I want to speak to my dad and hug him. I started working out in November and have made some gains. I'm going to start going to the gym in October and I'll finally be able to cook my own food (I was living in a student accommodation but I'm moving out in a couple of days) so I should be able to get better results. My Year 5 teacher told me I was a "man of 1000 talents." I just want to go back to being that happy, intelligent and successful me.
Human expectations are insane, man. I don’t what else to tell you because I’ve got plenty of places I want to make it “up” to as well, but I hope you can find a way to cut yourself some slack. If you’re putting so much pressure on yourself for the greater good of humanity-godspeed to you. Otherwise, maybe lightly surrender your mind to the fact that our cups can never be filled by knowledge or a strong drive to prove ourselves to others. I’ve seen it attempted in others and most recently myself; I’m very dissatisfied with the results. That’s not a reason to stop striving, of course. But it’s a way to accept failure. We all fail. Maybe at different degrees that are determined by our societal origins, but still fail. No one should expect any different from us, honestly. We didn’t ask to be flung into existence. We are born deer in the headlights of a vehicle that takes way too long to hit us. Anything extra should be considered a blessing. Kudos for already being a blessing to this world with your effort. And that’s regardless of outcome.
That's really cool Jordan, you made a pact with your wife that you would always tell each other the truth. It is such a big deal because you can rely upon honest criticism. We know that we are all flawed. I wish that I had that at 25 because it took a lot longer for me to sort out the shit from my life.
I'm 30 I have severe social anxiety I hope by 35 too conquer that fear along with own a house in cash along with finding someone that understands me... ( when I'm 35 I'm going to come back to this post and whoever sees this or is going to see it I'll let you know how my progress is going)
redrum murder I’d like to be kept in the loop brotha. I’m 25 and have very bad anxiety as well, one day at a time we’ll pull through! Keep shining and it’s never too late
I am 24 in my second year of graduate school. Have had tobacco problems in the same way he described. So nice the see a beacon of light in a seemingly hopeless struggle. Thank you, Jordan. We needed to hear this.
Idk how,but I have being followed JP videos for a while now, and it is pretty impressive how can anyone change. I am 37 years old, and recently I discovered that my life is not mine, and was always in this slippery place, but a man comes to a point where starts to grow up, and be more responsible. I have addictions that probably most people have or had, but it’s time for a change. You a true inspiration JP, and you make such a big difference in this horrible world, and you inspired me to find that better version of myself, and obviously it’s not going to happen overnight, but i will never give up until I find out what my purpose is.
I'm the same. I'm turning 23 in three months. Good thing the past me decided to step up and focus on my future. When I was 22 I was so lost with my life. After listening to podcasts of Jordan Peterson, listening to advice, started cleaning my room, and switching courses for two times I almost got my shit together.
I'm a female, as soon as a turned 25 I had a mini quarter life crisis. I have been struggling through uni, panicking that it is going to lead me nowhere. Have ADHD, smoked weed and cigarettes, have a bad diet, barely work out, can't drive and still live with my parents. 3 weeks ago I decided to stop smoking weed, I started walking more, eating healthier and today I smoke my last cigarette (I'll vape, but still). I'm going to take my savings and work/travel next year, leaving my parents home and learn to be independent. I'm driving more and planning to book in to get my license. 25 is the year, it's never too late.
@@AceDestinyGaming thank you :) I'm doing a lot better. I have lost a lot of weight, still haven't touched weed and I've had the odd cigarette but those days are pretty much over. I just got my visa for the UK and I'll be gone in 3 months. I falter often but I still strive. 😁 onwards and upwards. Thank you for the reminder
