How To Be A Good Ally: Why This Years Philly Trans Wellness Conference May Be My Last 

I'm not surprised, but... yikes. How do cis people continuously not understand how important it is to have trans people involved in spaces meant for trans people?

Thank you so much for releasing this video! I was unaware of the situation. I hate having to argue with activists who don't see the difference between elevating voices and speaking over them. 😡

This is so upsetting I was planning on going to the conference. But I appreciate you going over this and breaking it down. Because I read the post but my brain just couldn't comprehend on its own.

I live close to Philly and considered going to the Mazzoni center for support groups and whatever but my interactions with the coordinators via email and phone kinda turned me off and now I’m glad I trusted my gut about them :/

Don't worry about releasing two serious videos in a row! I support what you need to say and if it's serious or fun, I'll watch it either way. I hope you're having a comfortable winter

Hello! Im in the Philadlephia area and theres a lot of backlash going on. As a trans person of color, I was really offended when I saw that the Mazzoni center did this especially since they also cater to many poc for medical care in general. At the same time, I didnt know that they also had a cishet white woman as the CEO and I belive she was kicked out? But theyre having severe management issues and its crumbling. On another note: The nurse practicioner (mine and many others) is switching to another hospital to work and now theres going to be hundreds of trans youth without a new person in place to help take care of trans youth. No one wants to work with the Mazzoni center anymore. Its so sad how our community is commodified as something thats just for profit and that we arent even human.

You are incredibly articulate and respectful, kudos! Every ally should watch this, I feel like it applies to anything

It's easy to spot those who do activism only for boosting their ego. I've experienced that with some ¨feminist men¨ (that's what they called themselves) and it's just so annoying. They wanted so bad to ¨help our cause¨, but were super offended if we DARE address them any critique about HOW they are NOT helping ¨our cause¨, and WHY. Someone who really wanna help a group will listen to them and take notes.

This saddens me and I’m sorry this is happening. I have tons of love and respect for you my friend!!! 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Great video Aaron... hopefully they acknowledge their mistake, & bring the Trans Organizers back into the fold. I want to say that I'm shocked, but a big Co taking over like this is a danger that people face when trying to bring their message to a larger audience. I would not be shocked if certain people pushed for this so they would be allowed into Safe Spaces like the show & tell for example . The fact that anyone would want to invade such a vulnerable sharing time shows how selfish people can be. Hopefully the 👎pusher has enough integrity not to push today. 🤔

"Sometimes, some individuals will think that they're exempt, that their privilege doesn't count, that they don't have the ability to oppress, so they'll think that it's okay for them to say certain things, to make certain claims. They'll think it's okay for them to be apart of certain groups so that they could do more activist work, but you never have the right to be infiltrating a safe space that you do not belong in. [...] Regardless, the privilege that you have, it exists. It exists whether or not you are the most aware person in the world, and you amplify all the voices in the world, you still have privilege, and with privilege comes the ability to oppress. [...] You have to be very mindful of speaking over people. Activism isn't about glorifying yourself, and coming across as a hero; amplifying other people's voices isn't about 'look at me, I'm so great. Aren't I so nice and so aware? I care so much about marginalised communities.' It's not about that, it's not about you." I see you, man. I support you.

It's interesting to me (and really really good!) that you're the one speaking about this because you have a disability and this is a thing that happens so often to people with disabilities. There should be nothing about a group of people without the involvement of that group. So well articulated.

This is disappointing. Thank you for sharing this information and speaking out.

I’m a cis viewer and I’m so disheartened to hear that about the conference. Of course silencing the voices of trans folks makes it a less safe / comfortable space for the people the conference is intended for! I am saddened to hear that so many people get so lost in their privilege, and that this is a needed reminder (that should not be needed!). I hope those of us from the cispool of humans can do better.

Thank you for sharing. This is really disappointing news.

I love your serious videos! You have a lot of very good insights and I have never been disappointed by an upload. Also don't fret about us, speak your mind! Thats what we're all here for 💜

Huh kinda reminds me of a certain "hire a cis person to play a trans character/role in a movie" issue a couple months ago...

Cant wait for a new video aaron❤

Thank you for making this and speaking up!

This is really important and well said! Thank you for talking about it Aaron! Also on a less serious note at 6:08 I was expecting a "Not for anything" bc I was recently binging old podcasts rip Not For Anything

this is an excelent and enlightning video! it applies for all kinds of activism as well, i hope it reaches millions as i think this is a very very important message

Thank you so much for this Aaron. I went to the conference for the first time last year and I had such a great time. This really makes me think though. I don’t understand why cis ppl think they have to run stuff we need to. I hate that. You are so right. We need to run our own things cos we know. Cis ppl just can not understand everything about us. Thank you for all you videos Aaron. Love you.

hey I noticed the podcast hasn’t come out in a long while, and I 100% support you taking a break or ending it if that’s what you need. I just hope that you’re doing okay, Aaron ♥️

Aw dang that’s disheartening to hear...I was really looking forward to going sometime in the future whenever I could but I don’t know if I want to knowing that info.I probably won’t,I was completely unaware of this.Thanks for informing us :) love you 💞

I wish I had seen this before I applied to give a workshop at the conference, thank you for making this

Are y'all not doing the podcast anymore?

You are so well spoken

I got a 10 minute ad but I'm gonna watch all of it anyway, Ily boy

Thanks for letting is know Aaron! It sucks when people overstep their bounds especially when they think they are doing good.

As others have said, don't worry about being serious. Life calls for serious moments sometimes and there is no way I would have found out about this had you not said anything about it. I love the convention, meeting you, meeting other trans people, having a packer signed by my idols™ (for those curious, Aaron, Chase, Mike, and Ty all signed it), and having normal booths selling packers, bras, binders, and sex toys was just an amazing environment for normalizing those things. Mind you, that's ignoring the rich background of disabled and people of color communities also involved. I really hate that we will probably lose this conference to people who think that it's fine reading their plagiarized version of our speech. With that, though, I understand not wanting to go after this next one. The privileged group taking over is very dangerous, and I am also worried about it. Wow, hi. My name is I talk/type too much. Thanks to those who read all this. You're probably a nice person

As someone who used to live in Philly and knows a lot of trans people who have used services at Mazzoni, this doesn’t really surprise me. It disappoints me, but it’s not surprising. They had a reputation for being pretty gatekeep-y, beyond the current state regulations. Some of my friends used to be on the trans committee you mentioned; I’ll have to check in with them to see if they know more about the current situation. So glad you brought this up!

Gotta love an outspoken boi ❤️❤️

Thank you for sharing! Ily Aaron! This is sad news, I was harboring hope to go sometime but if its run by cis people and this going on with this organization, I don't think I'll get to go after all

Thanks for this video. I'm a cis girl trying to be a better friend for my recently out girl friend.

Ugh, yet another conference/expo that went to shit. CTNx also had issues with corruption and exploitation. I actually wanted to attend Philly Trans Health Conference, but I guess it's not worth it anymore. Thank you, Aaron, for speaking out and exposing the corruption and exploitation. You're doing God's work.

thank you for taking the time to break this down, this is very disappointing news really liked your discussion on privilege within activism

Fucking yikes-o-rama dude. The Cis™ are always doing the most. My soul is on F I R E 🔥😡🔥

That's really disappointing. I've never been to the conference but I always thought it would be nice to be in that safe space and planned to go at some point. I definitely would not feel as comfortable being there if it was completely run by cis people though. I guess I may never go now. 🙁

What a stunning and brave young woman.

Thank you for making this video! I'm always wondering what I should/could do for the community but what's important too is what I shouldn't do! As good intended as we can be we are not trans and shouldn't be taking your places in your spaces created by trans people for trans people. I am so mad at this organization. I am not even living in America --'

Not even done watching this yet and it's already Cisgusting. Why are the cis like this

I went the last 2 years and had a great time...this is so disappointing :(

There are so many tiny, barely noticeable elements of reality that they would not know existed at all unless they were trans.

Pretty fly for a trans guy, idk i just thought of that from the song, but thank you for talking about this your good at informing people Edit: not sure if the joke was offensive..

I'd go to an Aaron Con!

I don't always agree with your vodeos, but this is so important. I had no idea this was happening and is really fucked up.

I was thinking about saving up to go this year, but this news just kinda turned me off of it. It would cost so much money to go, it's not worth it if it's not going to be trans-led. I wish there was something similar in Toronto, because I would be all over that

I'm not incredibly familiar with the committee of trans folks behind the conference nor their relationship with Mazzoni. Do you think it's the sort of thing where if the conference gets terrible reviews this year they could part ways and find a new sponsor for 2020? Or are they bound together permanently?

Why is it they have the power to do that? Surely the trans committee own the name!? Intellectual copyright or something? I hope they can reboot their own conference: I hope they get the support to wrestle the name back and, as I say, run their own conference.

That's a major yikes. Like that's actually very bad. I go to the Mazzoni center for my hormones, and this more than slightly makes me want to change where I go for it, but since I'm there under informed consent, I'll have to start doing some research about what I'll need to do.

I hope they fix it, I've wanted to go for a while now

This would be my first year to go now I am doubting it super bummed.. where is there another trans event in the east coast that you know of???

since you've mentioned Chase... what've happened? should we hope for a podcast or it's over for good?

Awww I wanted to go one day :(

I got an ad

there is a term called "moral licensing" you might have some use for. thanks for that video.

Are you and chase even friends anymore? I see that you don’t follow each other on Instagram anymore

Please check out Robin DiAngelo!

welp, guess I won't be attending the conference at any point in the future then, if this is how they treat us.

just got a transphobic PraegerU ad on this video, unfortunately

This is rubbish. But on the bright side, I got an ad for gluten free bread!

I don't know what to say. This makes me feel so upset. I want to believe the best of people but honestly I'm so tired of feeling like trans experiences and feelings don't matter. Then if a trans person is upset they get treated like they're the problem .

I just want to say that I found access at the 2018 conference to be crap. Things that were promised just never happened and I wasn't even told ahead of time. Some basic things like use of an assistive listening system were not even considered, and I have talked to other disabled people who had the same experience. I had a great time anyway, because of the people I met but I had really no access for various reasons to the exhibits, and had problems with a lot of the workshops. Just saying. That is beside the issue of removing trans leadership, but please don't talk about the great access - disabled attendees are the ones to answer that and we were not asked.

Damn! That's a load of crap, just hijacking this event?!? Wtaf!

Only cis folks organizing a trans conference with few or no trans organizers? Wow, huge yikes.... i'm sorry, how disappointing but unsurprising.

Don't think I'd want to with cis running it all