It's Your mindset , y'all It's not being delusional or narcissistic as long as you're not hurting others. Being a confident hot girl doesn't mean that you have to be a bitch , a baddie who don't give a shit about others' feelings. It's accepting and loving your flaws + minding your own business.
@@user-le2hu1ct4t Honestly - most people who start social media understand that they are attractive and so Inherently are more comfortable being in front of a camera This does not mean that unattractive people cannot do well socially of course, but personality can only take someone so far in reality
It's actually not as simple as 'mindset', if someone isn't hot and confident, then mindset won't cut it. It's the sad truth most don't want to hear but it's better to hear it now then spend hours on end on oyutube and whatever being distracted from what actually makes a person hot and confident. I'm saying it because it's fucking annoying when people try fake shit, it's yuck, shit, and straight fake. Go out and find hobbies, go get a careeer, lifestyle all these build character and personality that makes someone so many things that is attractive, along with a time to work on personal development. People don't like the truth, but get used to it now, so you aren't old feeling the same thing wondering why you aren't attractive, 'accept yourself' just think and make action and half the time I'd be trolling anyways like in my life haha, because well humor is the best medicine. Actually hot and sexy people, what makes them hot, is something that has taken a lot of their own truths, they're chill, they're a lot of things and it comes naturally (authenticity) they have nothing to prove at all, where they accept themselves. This video already turns me off because it's a about me video, that says it all. Fuck that, that is not hot, someone who's hot, just would not revolve it around them, they'd talk about the idea of it, then go on to what would get a person to that idea, you know point A to point B and so on. Serious just do llife everyone and love yourself, define it, really define it and work on it and your life should mirror that. Yuck yuck yuck, hate on me everyone please, I love it just like you, hence I'll say it now, I'll thank you all another time when I have the energy, divine masculine checking out. Now hello this is a person of society who wants to say he agrees, and I agree to. Well thank you sista.
@@akiraofa everyone can be externally attractive, they just need to see what looks work for them. If Mad has had dirty short hair that didn't match her face structure, pale unhealthy face and dirty clothes she wouldn't even be famous. You just need to study your own identity
Social psychology student here ! What you're talking about actually has a name in literature ! it's called non contingent self-esteem, meaning self esteem that doesn't depend on norms, social comparison or any form of external pressure. Almost no one has a fully non contingent self-esteem (thankfully so bc needing a little bit of external validation is essential for all) but yeah some people think they have confidence when actually they just adjusted themselves well to other people's norms and for now they're receiving external positive feedback, but there always comes a time where you can't meet every single expectation, and that confidence vanishes bc your self esteem was relying on norms, etc. (There is also something called external vs internal self-esteem, but i prefer the notion of contingent self esteem, bc sometimes you think something suits your internal self-esteem but it can be internalised norms!)
Yes it does but you don’t see what work they really do I am genetically blessed wit a amazing body but I still put in so much effort in looking good everyone can work on themselves
@@saraazizam4519 I am genetically not blessed and no matter how much effort I put into looking good, it doesn't improve significantly. And it's stupid to pretend like there are no beauty standards that affect people's confidence (especially for women).
I don't think the gym thing is entirely about getting abs or becoming muscular. I think it's also about having a long-term commitment to something, which is rare these days because we jump from one trend to another. I also have started going to the gym and although I am still lanky, the little bits of improvement I have seen like being able to lift more is satisfying and gives me confidence. I don't know if I'm phrasing it right but basically, seeing the work pay off in the long run feels good, not the fact that I will have abs or something like that.
I never felt like I got a message more! I'm going to try and be less judgemental now and accept that being confident now is something not to be afraid of, thank you madeline xx
being overconfident is very obvious in people, because they are actually extremely insecure and self-doubting. being truly confident is understanding you have flaws and not caring one inch anyway because you rise above all that. the delusion needs to be built from within, not from tearing others down.
True. The reason one is overconfident is because they're trying to compensate for a lack of confidence. Nothing wrong with that but it's not true confidence.
I'd never use the word overconfident, to explain arrogant & cocky insecure behaviour. To me Confidence is the opposite of insecurity, so 'overconfident' doesn't make sense.
girl the gym helps with confidence SCIENTIFICALLY. boost of endorphins and literally confidence . you have to get into the habit of it just like doing yoga, breath work and meditation
Absolutely true, people get in their own heads alowing others to dictate how they be, ive gotten my fair share of negstivity and have been bullied my whole life and it has truly built my character and my mental toughness to not give a single fuck anymore of what other people have to say. You become confident not by saying affirmations, but by building an undeniable stack of proof you are who you say you are. Egos are key, but most be tamed. A healthy ego is great to be confident. Only person who has to believe in you to be confident is you.
I'm seeing her for the first time and I swear whatever she said actually left a very good impression on me..I feel like when I go out alone people will look at me and I feel so nervous always and because of that I always prefer to stay home may be I have social anxiety but watching this video actually motivated me and like I will probably have to remind myself again to watch this whenever the next time I doubt myself like seriously thank you for making this ❤️❤️
Your advice is good for someone who is depressed and unable to make those initial steps toward progress. However, true lifelong confidence comes from competence which comes from self awareness, honesty and the development of ones skillset. Faking it till you make it is cool at first, but eventually you gotta build character through life's struggles
i think it mainly applies to conventionally attractive people with self-confidence issues, the unfortunate reality is a lot of people stand little to gain from acting like someone theyre not. not everyone is "hot", no one is all the time, but if your already attractive sure go around with a massive ego until you become more self aware but if you don't at some point either all of your relationships will be shallow or you won't be hot anymore, missing all that growth you should have undergone.
I believe in stating value you know you can provide. Otherwise, it would be misrepresenting and putting yourself and others in an awkward position if you deceived others and yourself. This woman was talking against sense when she said humans are the only species that communicates. Sometimes she sounded like she was on something.
@@bunelocke4371 Sorry, I forgot that attractive people live through an alternate reality. Next time , I'll consult my hot girl physicist before I construct theories.
Confidence isn't about thinking you're good at something. It's about feeling comfortable and worthy of respect. People can't decide to be delusional. And it's not helpful to try. As Madaline points out: One day you'll be old and ugly. And then where will your confidence be? It needs to be coming from somewhere else. And obviously also not expensive products.
@@hardrock9199 From the knowledge that you don't have to prove yourself. You can't just decide to feel that way. But trying to be less judgemental of others and applying that same kindness to yourself is probably helpful.
respect comes from actually knowing stuff respect is earned not freely given lmao. old ppl arent automatically confident so i dont think theyre really relevant in this conversation.
Really needed to hear this. I've heard a lot of this stuff before but always just seemed like stuff people said because it sounds nice but I feel for the first time it actually makes sense and is starting to set in... The idea that it doesn't really matter what other people thing about you because at the end of the day how you feel about yourself is the only thing that really matters. Took me a long time to truly understand this...
HiI have one thing to share about your gym sentiment, setting a standard for myself by going x times a week, sticking with it through trials, built trust in my abilities to keep the promises I make to myself. In this way, it has augmented my confidence. Could of course be done through different avenues but it helped me immensely xo
This stream-of-consciousness rambling is top content! Please keep pouring your heart and mind out without any pre-writing or editing, because half an hour of you sitting in a car talking non-stop to the camera is what everyone didn't know they needed but they do. That cogent message of yours that's buried somewhere in the ad nauseum word-salad, we're sure to get eventually, because every single person who clicked on this video is, of course, going to watch ALL 29 MINUTES of you... just... talking... off... the... top... of... your... head.
"People are not fully developed" I loved this quote. I had so much contact with people that did not have fully developed social skills, and I told to myself they were just "creeps", but i forgot that we are young, we have tons of years to live, so it is actually normal for someone in my generation to behave in this way. I recently have been told that I was attractive by people like this and I kinda looked down on them a little (I am ashamed of myself). This video helped me realize that "creeps" does not always mean "weird people", sometimes is meant for "people that are going to evolve one day". (Also, even if they are creeps, everyone deserves respect) :) I also like going to the gym, but it is true that you can become obsessed with your body, so be careful. (Sorry for my bad english) Great video ♥.
WHen women call men creeps they usually men unattractive men. What makes a man creepy or not can sometimes be a lack of social skills. But it can be something as simple as a lack of confidence and or experience and being socially awkward as a result of it. And women are brutal and cruel to those people. I find it funny that women who are suppose to be the fairer empathic sex are brutal and heartless towards men, especially weak men and men in need. It is hilarious honestly. At least you admit it. But the truth is it seems most women are like this. Which leads to genuinely nice but boring and average guys being hurt by women all their lives growing up. Men who dont understand masculinity is attractive to women and just assume becuase they are nice good people it means women should desire them or want them, becuase women always preach it is what is on the inside that counts right? RIGHT! ? until they learn to hate women as a whole. Which hurts women in the end. Because then older women hit the wall which is very real. They lose their pretty privilege due to losing their youth. Which is what scientifically attracts men to women. Youth and fertility and femininity. And then they become invisible to men. So what happens is they learn to hate men and ask where have all the good men gone? And then those nice guys who were hurt by and invisible to women all their lives with your mentality given to them, already hate women so then they dont give a damn about the older women looking for a good man. Which is why they say. Where are all the good men? you killed them. From the mans point of view. What you notice is alot of older women complain about how men ghost them and are fickle and treat them like shit? its called karma. This is how the majority of women treat men in the dating market when men are desperate simps and women are in their sexual desirable primes with an abundance of choices. When those men get older their testosterone levels drop and thus the little devil in their pants stops tormenting them and they are able to think with their brain. This is why older women get treated like shit by men. Because those men start treating women the way women treated them all their lives growing up. Using the same tactics women used, back on them. To which older women are oblivious to. They have no idea why this happens. Something women dont care about since they tend to focus on their needs and rights and problems and dont think about or care about or focus on mens rights and issues or listen to what men actually think and want from their point of view. It is often instead rooted in belief and ideology and projection. Most women will never admit this. But if a man is ugly and especially lacks confidence then everything he says and does is creepy to women. While a hot man who is confident can get away with anything. Men know this so they MGTOW. Men are walking away. Alot of men dont have the mentality well i Need to build myself up and become attractive to women and snag a mate. Their mentality is well life is unfair and women wont accept me for who I am on the inside, so screw it I will just walk away and play video games and enjoy my life alone. It is very similar to how you have fat ugly women who are undesirable to men. Same situation. Either they learn to better themselves and build themselves up or they just embrace being alone and hate on men for being sexist pigs. Two sides of the same coin. With both sides empathizing with each-other in their echo chambers. The men, lots of nice guys grouping up about how all women suck and how great walking away is. And women grouping up and going all men suck and only care about looks ext and your a goddess dont listen to them. TWO sides of the same coin. Both sides choose to walk away instead of trying to master the game and succeed at it by understanding the rules and gaining competence at it. They choose to hate the game instead due to their moral upbringing? and this flawed fairy tale belief about men and women being something other then what they truly are. Flawed beings driven by their base instincts and biology. The problem is our TRUE human nature is pretty cruel. And we are raised to have these moral beliefs and expectations about how life is suppose to work and the way men and women are suppose to be. And the reality is men and women are both pretty cruel and suck in their own ways due to biology. Either you learn to hate the truth and walk away because it conflicts with your ideology and moral righteousness. Or you learn to embrace the fact we are flawed and learn to love men and women for what they truly are in spite of it. Realism versus fairy tales. Red versus blue pills.
i love this, bc i come across so many ppl that seem so confidence but shouting it so loud or stepping on other and then i refuse to become like them and rather to be shy and close, but having someone say it so clear ,like those ppl are not normal, and you shouldn’t aspire to that , that is so nice. i used to also fee awful for not liking those ppl and now i get why
Your content was indeed strengthening. I really loved the part where you talked about ‘flushing the toilet’. We are able to identify a person disrespecting us only when we truly start respecting our own selves. It’s the small steps/decisions (which we think may be insignificant) that actually prove to impact the bigger decisions in our lives. Loved your message!
Omg Madeline!!! I just came across your content and I feel so grateful ahhh I LOVE this video. Such inspiring tips here, definitely going to start incorporating these habits to upgrade my confidence and relish in my beauty :)) So much of what you're sharing here reminds me Superhuman meditations that I started using recently after a friend showed it to me. It's a really cool concept - multi tasking meditations helping you tap in to your ultimate self and manifest your future. Sooo applicable to leveling up your life and getting clear on how you want to live and feel. Can't help but share b/c I feel like you'd love it haha :)) it's been a game changer for me! So excited to explore all of your content x
16:35 spot on. When you look good, you feel good, when you feel good, you look good.(even if you don’t LMAO.) you literally have to start your day with intention. The rest falls into place even if it’s not the best you feel a lot better.
i think i really needed this today- like my mental health has just been absolute dog shit since i started uni and its gotten to the point where i'm actually just sick of feeling like this and also just of myself and my brain for making every day such a damn pain. i might just adopt this approach because im currently being delusional in the opposite sense where im assuming the worst of myself and life and maybe being delusional in a confident sense with be the solution
I'm a guy and what you're saying reminded me of what I've been doing. I kinda went down the whole sigma male thing and still have trace effects of it. It does help to a large degree to swing yourself back in the other direction but as time goes on you'll see how in a lot of ways you're still deeply unsettled and ruled by the problems that you think you're fighting against. It becomes a sort of mania almost - upholding this internal persona of who you should be. In your mind, it's like *that* person is the only person who can actually feel good, have an upward trajectory in life, achieve things, and at least for me, worthy to really even be playing this game of life. I hope you get gains from going down this path but know that when you reach a point of feeling like what you're thinking/doing has reached its natural end, it is time to sit down and have a conversation with yourself about everything. That's where the real sauce is. A person who really has things figured out will have an almost infectious, silent, wise peace. A sort of grace. But I think before you can get there, it won't hurt to catapult yourself forward with that sort of delusional confidence. Hope you'll be well
the world is shit but ignorance is bliss. Once you decide you dont deserve the negative things you have done to yourself and thought of- Once you decide you want to be happy and feel genereally better- life becomes so much happier and “easier”.
These pods make me think about things in ways I never would have thought about them myself and I love that. It’s like you can just voice every single thought you have in the clearest way, I admire that so much.
I wish I saw this when I was a young teenager, like 16, before I made so many life mistakes. Honestly best advice ever, feeling like I deluded myself to be less than I actually am. Love this, will keep going back to this video to remind myself of this message.
(ignore my English lol) but yeah ITS OKAY GIRLL !! maybe this video was meant to find you in this current age of yours rather than your teenage years, maybe if the teenage you would've watched this video that time but wouldn't really get the point of it, so everything happens for a reason & don't worry, this reached you at the right time.
I learn English by your podcasts and you make me absolutely pleased with today ones. How much words you used to discribe, like, word miss: overlook, skim, brush over, disregard, skip on. What a wonderful piece of information
The thing about going to the gym isn’t the looks it builds but the discipline it builds. The Confidence comes from you doing something even tho you don’t want to do it, it gives you more self respect. And it is good for your mental health. The bigger muscles or slimmer body is just benefits of going consistently.
Hot women or average looking women in general only understand this cognitively since they get constant validation ( from other women and men) for just turning up in the morning.
I agree with everything you’ve said. It’s true how someone gets more attractive and beautiful as you get to know them as a person and has nothing to do with how he or she appears but some people do feel better and confident once they’ve joined the gym and start seeing changes in their body. It’s no one to blame. It’s much more important to be confident being you, but the first thing that comes up when you see someone is their physical appearance and sadly, it is one of the first impression someone has. Although going to the Gym or not is completely on oneself and the confidence related to it is subjective. In addition, gym also has made me feel a lot healthier and stronger. But one thing I can say, this video has somehow impacted positively, hope I can carry it forward in practical. Much love ❤❤
I think the gym can help for confidence as it helps you to feel healthy and strong and capable to do things that might otherwise be too heavy. I reckon not for everyone but for me its like that :)
Reality is dictated by the perspective we take on circumstances. Most are waiting for circumstances to match their desire, so they remain perpetually unhappy. Watch your thoughts in a neutral non judgemental way, then change them to how you want.Bless you Madeline, this is GOLD.
This is super relatable. I was super delusional a year ago but incredibly confident. It was fun for a while but honestly I don't think it was helping me grow. I needed to put in the work in my passions and build real self confidence. Still working at it but better lol
if you felt confident by being delusional and this leading to you to gain motivation, this means that you work better with praise rather than constructive criticism and thats perfectly fine! knowing what makes you confident can help alot
I completely get where she’s coming from. Maddy is in a really tough industry so she has to literally be deluded in confidence. Confidence is really just being comfortable in your skin, clothes your environment.
Confidence is knowing your self worth to the point that you're not afraid to try something new and be wrong because you know no matter what, you'll never take anyone's action or any consequence as a definition of your own worth.
I was really delusional a year ago and in hindsight, I cringe at how I thought I was hot (I also had a grown out buzz cut). But you have a point. It’s a mindset. TIme to be delusional again this summer.
It always baffles me how astoundingly good looking people deny so badly the existence of ugly looking people. I dunno if it's because that way it justifies some of the special treatments they get for their looks, or just out of pity for other people. But it shouldn't be a matter of looking pretty or ugly; you can be ugly looking and have that not be a bad thing, unless other people treat you harshly for it; which happens a lot. But yeah, I agree you can look opposite to the standard requirements of physical beauty and still be a confident pretty person.
@@aeridolce I guess I get what you're trying to say, but me personally, I can't mix physical attractiveness and personality attractiveness. I always view them separately. So of course maybe everyone has some beauty in them, but that doesn't make them look better. At least not for me. I really can't share this worldview, I've tried and it only feels fake.
going to the gym is not just about getting abs it is a really healthy thing to do and can improve your confidence and mental health the same way looking after your hygiene etc can
I thought it was beautiful how you said nobody's ugly, I agree with you everybody has something attractive about them and anyone can be sexy just whether they have a good personality or a horrible person character wise.
Do they fuck. Commie vision applied to the animal kingdom to make you all feel better about being a follower. I’ve been around wolves and wild dogs, even pet dogs will stomp on a rival subordinate for food or attention.
I listened to this while organizing my room after weeks of not having a single energy to do it. This was just a small step but it helped a lot You said some wise words❗💖
7:28 I love you for that :')))) I really appreciate and resonate with the vulnerability of the validation subject, brushing teeth, flushing, I really got emotional because I understand exactly what you mean thank you so fucking much for sharing. "you deserve cleaniness" SUCH a huge sentences, game changer really
Ngl I had came up with this when I was 18, and never really thought anyone else would have thought the same. Finally I just randomly came across a video that puts those thoughts into articulate sentences
Literally just came back from lectures want to drop out cos I hate being perceived but thanks I’m gonna go to the library make my presence be known cause I’m perfection and my world is tarnished by the people living in it COS I let myself think that. I love people but I love them too hard so then it just leads to me hating MYSELF? I literally needed this, I might have hated myself 4 minutes ago but I’m now a literal g god
Giving yourself the confidence is working towards the manifestation of your goals, it’s setting the standard for what you want to achieve. So it’s not a delusion but self work :)
see this is the type of mindset that will never get you anywhere. i promise you (like she said) being physically attractive has absolutely nothing to do with it, and over time when you love yourself over things that aren't just your physical being because there is SO much more to people then just what's on the outside, that love will shine and people will see that and start finding you attractive, because of the good energy. i promise you that.
@@coconutpops8260 yes, I know, this is kind of a joke, but you can't deny pretty people are more likely to be more confident than those who are not, because they already have this thing that can boost you personality.
@@sennosc theres no such thing as pretty people - its all perception. Give yourself lots of self care and believe you are of high vakue and you will believe it. Trust me.
I agree with everything but the point about the gym. As someone who feels like on top of the world, almost narcissistic while going to the gym, goddamn it develops my confidence from within so much. The gym is much more than getting abs, it’s about doing this hard work for yourself and doing it consistently to prove to yourself that you are worthy of a healthy body and strength and self respect. Remember guys if you eat healthy and exercise regularly you’re already on top of 90% of the population. And yes everyone will grow old and look wrinkly, but grow old healthily and gracefully, be able to live more independently for longer yk? It’s an investment in self
Kinda unrelated but since you mentioned it, to address your puppy pooping in her crate: other than making sure she’s going outside often enough, make sure to reward her every time she poops/pees in the right place (you can use treats, praise, toys, etc.). It might not have an effect right away, but she’ll learn to associate peeing/pooping in the right place. Practice makes perfect, consistency is key, and same goes for confidence lol! Love the video, I really needed it! 💕
25:40 - you talk about how people are just underdeveloped and even if we aren’t ill intended we may hurt people. This is SO true - my friend recently got upset with me because apparently throughout our friendship I’ve said things that have offended her. But I thought we were on great terms, and this was a complete surprise to me that she felt this way. But when she explained the things I did, looking back, the “things I said and did” were not ill intended AT ALL, or even rude. She had taken things I’d said, interpreted them negatively because of her low self worth, and related her interpretation of my words to who I am as a person. We have to take responsibility for the way we take things - we have the ability to not get offended at all when people say or do things. I’ve learnt to stop taking things to heart because especially as a teen, nobody is perfect and we’re all learning each day.
