How To NOT Ruin A Relationship! | Russell Brand 

You´re like an extra dad for the entire planet.

I love how hes so direct it's almost as if hes sitting in a room with you and telling you all this one on one in person

As someone who cant afford therapy these introspective chats have been quite helpful in positive forward thought.

His candor and awareness of his own faults makes him relatable. He's not a shaman sitting on a velvet pillow saying "do this, don't do that". His full admission of his own faults makes this real and feel attainable.

Russell has done major therapy to get to this point as a solid man and human being. It’s obvious and clear he wanted to change for the better and continue to be better for himself and his marriage. Now if every man could just be like Russell and become intrigued with human behavior and wake the hell up and “want”to address and “work” on all issues, it would be a global Disneyland.

I'm an expert level at this. And by "this" I mean ruining relationships.

Very helpful advice. And I'm always surprised at how Russell manages to talk to the camera as if talking to a person one on one!

90% relationships fail because you have unspoken about expectations on each other, and score keeping. The two big resentment pillars.

whenever a relationship ends i often feel like i will never find someone else, hearing russell talk about all of his relationships and how it took him getting to his late 30's/40's to really figure it out reminds me I still have time (after all I'm only 20)

The amount of positive aura this man has can be felt through my phone screen.

"Looking after yourself well" This cannot be stated enough how key this is. It's really important to constantly practice and grow awareness and let go of things like addiction, bad company, alcohol or drugs.

In the honeymoon phase, your wont and dont want to see the flaws of your partner.. with time, you will realize them more and more and thats where real love comes in to play. If you can make the step to be accepting and loving towards their flaws and personal development; if you stop holding on to the image you had from the partner in the honeymoon phase, thats real love!

"Neurosis is defined by doubt, psychosis is defined by certainty." This reminds me of what Rollo May says in The Courage to Create [super recommended book]: "Commitment is healthiest when it is not without doubt but in spite of doubt."

Self-love is the foundation for the best relationships! It solves so many of the insecurities we may have

HTTP 404 error........ Relationship not found

This is THEE FIRST relationship advice video ive seen...from someone who is MARRIED. I dont understand single people trying to do the same

The best way not to ruin relationships, is by having a good childhood.

I love you Russell. You've been so authentic through the years, and always questioning this mad gift of life we have. Bloody love ya x

What each of us believes in is up to us, but life is impossible without believing in something.

What a great video. It's really sad to me that we grow up with this attachment trauma issue and all of these mixed messages on what it's like to be in a relationship. I liked the analogy of the two trees growing next to each other. I would imagine that the trees are connected but still have the ability to grow on their own. unfortunately it seems like we have to make these love mistakes for us before we can really learn how to love ourselves and love another in a great relationship.

I'm going through such an incredibly hard break up where I made so many poor decisions. This video is saving my soul. Thank you Russell.

Please don’t ever stop sharing your gift of your awakened self. I can’t tell you how helpful and meaningful you are to so many… thank you Russell 🙏🏻

"I can start dumbly staring at a screen" 3:31 *me dumbly staring at the screen

1. Look after yourself well 2. Try not to control that person 3. Communicate honestly and openly 4. Your intention is for the best outcome for them, not always for yourself

Preach oh enlightened one

I love it when he said "unconsciously grooming them to be a certain way"

I remember when I viewed this man as just a funny comedian but as a guru his insights are spot on

Russell - you are such a delightful human. “Joy” is the word they comes to mind when I think of you. 🦋

I think Russell has a direct link to my brain . Are you A.I. Bless you and thank you 🙏🏼

Just finished a personal development and growth course , the best thing I’ve ever done , I thought I was self aware and living in the moment but I wasn’t !!! Best thing I’ve ever done , highly recommend it ! Thought it was going to be airy fairy and over the top but was the total opposite, now I have my little tool box I can go to . Everyone needs to do this in my opinion. ❤️

I really needed to hear this and am trying to take on board what applies (most of it does). I am in a long term relationship with a partner with severe depression and anxiety (which he won't seek help for) so I am constantly trying to find that balance between knowing where to draw the line but also remaining responsible for my own happiness and wellbeing.

Ive thought that letting my husband be his own person was enough- a lot compared to people around me. But I don’t ask myself “how can i be of service and support? ” But i do that at the beginning of relationships. Maybe what’s changed is me, and yes, that is what i can and should control. I really love how much i learn watching this videos.

Remarkable timing. Even though you don't know me, I haven't contacted you, and you're speaking to a broad audience, I feel like if I asked for your advice right now, this is what you would have said. I've just had the most important relationship in my life fail on me after years due to my OCD. Fortunately, we've ended it with love and dignity and without animosity, but the pain is intense and enormous and I've got to keep this in mind if I ever happen to be in a relationship again.

"If you don't have a shared vision, compatibility, or can't find a frequency that you can both live on, accept that the relationship will not succeed." The hardest thing for me was, should I keep trying, or walk away? Finally, walking away was my breakthrough moment. Thanks, Russell, this was a good one.

"Ensure that your intention is for the best outcome for that person." _B..E...Autiful_

I've got to be honest, I don't really recognize any of the things Russell say's here. I've been married for 40 years to my best friend, I don't own her, I do respect her, I don't take her for granted. When we have a disagreement, we talk about the thing we are disagreeing on, and never call each other bad names. I guess we've been doing something right?

I'm gonna treat myself to a Brand movie to celebrate my new sobriety today on Thanksgiving

It takes two very mature people to admit to each other that you are not compatible. In that way the love can continue even turn into friendship.

He nails it so easily Because he lived it experienced it He isn't just an 'ECHO' echoing a book, a teaching, a course another's experience It's why therepy/Therapists fail & cause more harm not healings because they haven't had any actual experience of what they're teaching/preaching Russell is Completely different comes from a KNOWING a Knowledge of experiencing the Experience 🤔🙌💖

I like the ingredients you have chosen and even more the menu with a 3-dimensional-taste you offer. Thank you Russel Brand!!

In fear of loosing harmony and the relationship I tried to control my partner. I recognised that I was wrong. In need of feeling fulfilled I made my partner responsible for how I feel. I I realised that I was wrong.

Dude, this is SO ON POINT! I have such respect for you.. your talks are so blunt and to the point.. your brutally honest approach is phenomenal.. but, the best way to teach/ share wisdom is by experience.. cheers to your sobriety. Stay awesome Sir.

This was much needed. Planning on watching it over and over. Thank you

Thanks, Russel. Your videos always give me that boost of inspiration and wisdom I needed to hear and confirm. You're helping so many of us wake up to our potential.

Thanks, Russell. Always posting what's on my mind.

Whilst I was watching you discuss how you have changed and what you now do to maintain your relationship, I really was impressed with your insight. I wish more people would have this wonderful insight. Thank you for sharing your personal journey!

This man is the living example of how personal and spiritual development can change a person from being dispiteful to being a GURU. I USED TO HATE HIM, couldn't stand him, now I just can not seem to stay away from listening to his videos every week. He has done such a good job working on this issues, that really inspires me. Such an awesome and wholesome human being.

Great video. Spot on. Thanks for your willingness to be truthful and authentic. Very refreshing. “What can I do for this person I’m in relationship with….” “Let go of any idea of controlling that person….” “Let people be who they are…” 🙏🏻💕🙏🏻

His book on addiction is very good. This guy is off the charts intelligent. I’m listening and reading and learning. Thank you Russell.

Easy keep to yourself and have nothing to do with anyone....pure success.

He sounds so healthy now, that is really neat. but I will say, he sounds like he is doing a heck of a lot of WORK "on himself" at all times, sounds exhausting. lol. i want to hear about him enjoying the fruits of his labors. He is an addict so I know they have to work on things constantly...

needed this thanks man!! in a one year relationship for a year now and this is really what i needed to hear boss

Realizing I could be a much better partner to my husband. A lot of missed opportunities to be one. Thank you for the tips!!

And as if sent from the almighty being in the apparent sky here comes Russell to my rescue when I need it again. These always seem to drop in a time when I need them. Thank you good sir. I hope you are well loved today!

I'm 37 and I'm only just realising that I've done this with my ex for the last 7 years. hopefully I can stop doing this moving forward

i seriously needed this video at this moment it’s a sign! thanks russel i always look forward to your vids

I just took some notes because I found his advice very helpful: Have a shared vision Have a nurturing and encouraging attitude Don't think it's your partner job to make you feel good You are like Tltwo trees growing next to each other. Love can be a tornado of feelings it's hard sometimes to handle them all. Don't control the other person or try to control them Don't criticize them Don't make them feel like they are responsible for your feelings Let them be their true self Don't impede their friendships and other relationships Don't impede any needs that they require Don't criticize and control their pursuits Focus on your own spirituality Stay aware and awake How can I encourage them? How can I advise, council or serve them? Let go of any idea of controlling or inhibiting that person. Don't Unconsciously groom them to meet your needs🤯 Not feeling safe in relationships/fear can make someone become controlling. 🤯 Let people be who you are. Be your authentic self, if you are, you can't fail a relationship that is meant to be successful Continually communicate. The other person isn't responsible for how their behaviors make you feel. "I live in this relationship, therefore I need to behave very well in it." woah!! Your intention is for the best outcome for that person not the best outcome for yourself.

Great video.. you're right, the beginning is always so exciting.. slow fires burn longer though

Wow, wait to make me feel attacked in the first 30 seconds

youre on point regarding one cant groom him how you want. highexpectations.

The reference to Kahlil Gibran, the Prophet was great. My favorite poet and Philosopher

Thank you rus, can you do a video for living with a spirit less unconscience family? While being conscience..

The first and only relationship we should care about is with ourselves. And then all of the other ones... and most of us are so not in touch with our own reality and experience on this planet, that we can truly mess it up for whoever is with us too. When you know yourself, everything else becomes easier. At least that's how I see it. Great vid. ❤

Great Video! Stop blaming others for our own FAILURES...and remember.

2:33 I’ve also tried to control others in past relationship. I now realize, I’m in control as long as I’m in control physically, Mentally, and spirituality. I think that’s one of the key points here.

You are helping me be a better wife as well as a better human being. Thank you, Russell!

Russell with that universal timing once again, he has this magical ability to know the subjects we need to hear when we need to hear them! 21K likes.. 12 Dislikes.. 2121

Society has tried to teach us what love/relationships are. I believe there’s no definitive way of loving one’s mate (although you have to respect how someone wants to be loved). We’re all different. All have different needs and wants, and it’s on the two you to to dig deep inside of yourself and the other person, be extremely unselfish, and truly have a vision to put forward the effort of building an “empire” with your partner. I wish love, peace, and tranquility on everyone and with the correct mindset anyone can meet their mate. Who knows you may already have, and you just don’t know it yet...

I feel mesmerised, healed, enlightened, educated, intrigued, grateful, lost in the moment for each video I watch of Russell especially with relationships & spirituality. This man is surely becoming my guru, although our own teacher is within us it is also people like him & Echkart. Thank you 🙏 🌺🥰🧘‍♀️✨

Thank you for doing these videos Russell , you really have such a beautiful well spoken way of sharing your thoughts. I love your insights

This changed my perspective on everything. The yearning is just in our nature, perhaps as addicts or perhaps as humans. I really need a spiritual outlet. Wow.

Thanks russ!! Literally gong through it right now but this soothed my soul

I feel like this advice would have made my old relationship alot better. It would have gotten me out of my head and stop the overthinking a bit. It wouldnt have made the relationship work, but it may have been better and ended on a better note. Shame I didnt see this or something like this back then.

Deep. So simple, but makes complete sense!

He’s owned up to mistakes and has grown from it I have so much respect

How Is this Even possible! To be In THIS BEAUTIFUL looking!!??? For a Man!!????? •starts hysterically CRYING•√√√√

1. Look after yourself well 2. Try not to control that person 3. Communicate honestly and openly 4. Your intention is for the best outcome for them, not always for yourself

I love you Russel! Thank you so much

Can't thank you enough Russell! Won't say the reason I had to watch this (a second time this month) in case she sees how fragile my ego is and how impatient I am. Was not far from throwing away possibly the most healthy relationship ever just because I was having a tantrum.

You're a good person Russel.

Those are all the ways I ruined my recent relationship. 🥺

Some of this was known but unsaid but a lot of new things to add to the work on myself

We are related I swear. Lol... Thanksgiving this year my house.

Once one has done ALL the things to ruin a relationship, lost the love and hit rock bottom. Is it possible for both parties to fall in love with eachother again?

I've ruined enough relationships to be a bona fide expert!!😜

It’s interesting hearing this and I can relate to the fact that this is how my ex was however I do feel like I made her responsible for making me feel happy with our realising. However she criticised my hobbies and would say she didn’t care and get annoyed with me for no reason. She ruined the relationship and then dumped me. I didn’t ruin it

I feel like this advice is gold especially about making sure you keep yourself emotionally / spiritually sustained and that you wish for the best for the other person always as well.

Thank you so much Russell for this amazing piece of advice 👍 I really need to adhere to this more regularly. I'm so extremely grateful for the positive suggestions 🙏 thanks again 😁

You are so fabulous and your logic is soothing! You made me feel so calm :)

Russell i fucking love you keep talking sense im not going to deep about the mater but you make a difference keep tuned in buddy your helping.

I got into a relationship TODAY I feel this is somewhat weirdly meant to be

Thank you sir.

Im gonna bookmark this for when I get in a relationship (if)

"Should I can I will I?" defines my life...that's not good...

Sitting and watching a 9 min vid on youtube you might usually expect to come away with one simple idea, but Russel doesn't add filler. He's got what he wants to share with you and it's informationally nutritious. It's directional and focussed, and networked with other deeper concepts. The purpose is communication not merely creation or repetition without meaning. Thanks Russell.

Thank you

These videos help me a lot... I’ve had issues with relationships due to my childhood.. I understand my faults but sometimes feel, why am I not good enough for them to stay but then I think why I feel that way and think back.. Unknowingly I’ve tried to be with the wrong people to understand how relationships work but it’s not until now I realise how good a relationship is with the right person when you work together rather than one sided. May not work the 1st or 4th time with someone but the right person it’s truly amazing 💓

this video came right on queue for me

All of your videos should be required courses in education around the world! The world would be such a better place, less divorces, & break-up's as well.

“Open comes all the time”… I like that