How to Pacifist the Dark Brotherhood 

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From a lore point of view this character is terrifying. Imagine the new Listener of the Dark Brotherood being known for their targets just...dying. Without any witnesses being able to point at them being assassinated, at least specifically by him. Whether they or someone near them succumbed to madness and involved them into a fight to the death, or combust in a mysterious fuel spill, not even the Brotherhood assassins themselves can trace their deaths back to him. Yet the Night Mother keeps rewarding and favoring him, which means he is still in the grace of Sithis. He MUST have killed those people, yet nobody can even guess how he does that. The only thing they know is that a contract made with him is even more of a death sentence than any other Brotherhood work, if such a thing is even possible.

Protected NPCs >Alduin >Son of a Captain. >Some guy who lives in a mill. >Some dude hired by the Emperor

The fact spiders can open doors in Skyrim is a terrifying prospect

Astrid: "Jarrin Root, just one taste of it can kill a man." Ymfah: *eats it* *fucking dies*

"what kind of cruel person are you?" People Killed: 0 Dogs punched: 1

"I'm a pacifist" Throws explosive spider at people's face "I didn't kill, the fire did

I need a version of Skyrim that has all of Ymfah's characters as NPCs, the archmage of the college of winterhold...which knows no magic, the retired-assassin that has never killed a man before, the warrior who's equipment is strangely weightless, the guildmaster of the Thieves' Guild renowned for breaking the laws of physics before breaking the laws of the state etc.

Random elf in his underwear breaks into some kids house “you must be the assassin that I’m trying to hire”

This takes some batman levels of pacifism. “ I didn’t kill them I just smashed there heads into the electrical box. The electricity killed them”

> Punching a kid = 40 gold > Punching a dog = 45 gold Perfectly balanced, as all things should be

Astrid: “I’m... too weak.” *Gives her a cup* Astrid: *Gets up and starts attacking*

*chooses to sleep for 24 hours* *Astrid kidnaps me after 30 mins* *Astrid endures the suffering of watching me sleep for nearly an entire f***ing day.*

Astrid, dying: "You must kill me" *Gives Astrid a free necklace* Astrid: *NEVER SHOULD HAVE COME HERE*

13:19 > Completed: violate the dark mother chamber. > Side quest: conduct an STD test.

ive been playing the game for a decade and this is the first time ive ever heard of the mind control spiders. i love skyrim

I remember the first time hearing astrid say "You're not leaving this shack until someone dies" and I thought she was now my enemy for the storyline so I killed her lol

"How to Pacifist the Dark Brotherhood" Punches orphan child in his sleep

Next: How to complete the bard's college without singing Oh wait...

Fun fact: Grelod is intentionally more fragile than most NPCs, to make the process of killing her go as smoothly as possible, and to prevent a drawn-out fight, which potentially could turn the other orphanage inhabitants hostile. She can be reliably killed with impact damage from telekinesis.

Astrid/Emperor: "Please kill me, I won't fight back" Ymfah: (sticks hand in pocket) Astrid/Emperor: *"Peace was never an option"*

My Jarl, there is a naked man running around your city, flying with a bucket and throwing spiders on people

“So Cicero wasn’t f*cking the Night Mother’s body?” I DIED

“pacifist” *punches kid to instigate mk ultra victim’s suicide by cop*

No matter how many times I watch this, I still laugh my ass off when he closes the door and the spiders just reopen it.

"The Gourmet has killed the Emperor" -Man who killed the Emperor

"Hey Alvor, I like your Sword" Alvor: Yeah I made it, wanna buy it? "No but you want to buy it" Alvor: Huh? Oh here's money and thanks for my stuff.

i always feel especially bad about killing narfi because on my first playthrough, i completed his quest to find his sisters necklace, making him so happy and thankful, that he considered me a friend and decided to show up at my wedding in riften, so i snuck him some gold before leaving. when i got the contract to kill narfi my heart sunk and i wanted to kill whoever put the contract out on him instead :(

Interestingly enough, you could've just helped Cicero prior to heading to Solstheim. He would've given you the 250 gold you needed to head there.

*"How to get to the Cloud District often without talking to Nazeem"*

Astrid: YOU have to kill someone to leave the shack. ymfah: *uno reverse spider*

Every time I see that stupid bucket with a handle under "Need", I just know it got really serious.

Ahhh, happy memories. I did the dark brotherhood questline with almost 0 sneak. When I got to the wedding, I had neither the fighting ability to kill openly nor the sneak to hide it. What I ended up doing was to frenzy the wife. She takes what's basically a butter knife to the nearest person (her husband), and he retaliated with a gigantic murder sword, killing her. The bounty for casting that spell is almost nothing, I paid it off right away and waltzed out clean in the eyes of the law. It was funny that the quest after acted like there was some big chaos going on I had to escape, when really everything was totally calm.

I like how a pacifist run includes more explosions than a destruction magic only run.

"I won't be intimidated in my own orphanage!" >is outside the orphanage

I lost it when Astrid, literally roasted and begging to die, sprang up after a botched pickpocket attempt.

Someone finally did it. They played the Brotherhood questline as Bethesda intended.

How to Pacifist Dark Brotherhood Step 1 : Be Spider-man

In court: “Judge I didn’t murder that man” “Okay then l, who did?” “The splodey spiders did”

I always liked that Astrid was chilling on top of a bookshelf. And then no other character does something like that in game again. Also, Astrid is one of the oldest Scandinavian names. It means something like flower.

Fun fact: grelod the kind only has 1 health, so basically anything can kill her. Tossing an object at her very lightly is enough to kill her

"Dark Brotherhood but Pacifist Route" Next video: "Beating the Skyrim main story but in Morrowind"

Random Guard: THE GOURMET HAS KILLED THE EMPEROR. *guard who stabbed the emperor to death*: Yeah totally

26:34 I love the fact that he said “Rexus! Help me!” And rexus kills him

me, playing skyrim and eating a sandwich: what a beautiful duwang

So this is where Kira ended up after turning around in the Ghost Alley

I've played Skyrim for easily 1000+ hours and never knew these spider things existed wtf

imagine guarding the emperor and suddenly a random bucket falls down in front of you

Lol I didn’t realise until now: 7:06 It says at the top left corner “Cicero will remember this”

I think there's a Skyrim reference in this Jojo episode

Astrid : one bite of this potent deadly herb and... Hero : drops dead immediately

"I won't fight you... unless you put stuff in my pockets, that really grinds my gears"

Random wood elf: *suplexxes grelod* The children: *cheering* Grelod: you don't scare me

"So Cicero wasn't fcking the Night Mother's body" you are a genius

Oh yes, this is what i like to see after playing some skyrim for 3 hours.

"So you're an assassin?" Dragonborn: "Yes, but actually no."

Seeing a mostly naked and burned Astrid get up and walk around is so cursed

Safe at last. (Closes door) *Spider opens door* (Video cuts off)

"I beat Dark Brotherhood while being a Pacifist!" "How?" "I threw 5 kinds of spiders in people's faces. And used UNO Reverse Cards."

I like how he could’ve just downloaded a mod to make killer queen, but instead he was committed to doing it vanilla style just to stay true to form and so people don’t think he’s cheating with mods

Dark Brotherhood: You must kill. ymfah: Peace was always an option.

Alternative Title: How many protected NPCs are part of the Dark Brotherhood quest?

I really loved the visual of all those ghosts crowded behind that gate as if they weren't...ghosts. That, and charred Astrid just yeeting herself up because you pickpocketed her.

It's been 12 years since Skyrim came out and 3 years since this video was posted, and it never gets old, what an amazing game.

This is pretty much the opposite of your Thieves Guild challenge. Thieves Guild: Lots of (crimeless) killing, no crimes or bounties. Dark Brotherhood: Lots of crimes and bounties, no killing.

What next? College of Winterhold without using magic? The Companions without using melee weapons? Civil war quest without discrimination?

These videos give more insight into Skyrim's shortcomings than most attempts at legitimate critique of the game.

"My jarl, we have brought in a new criminal." "He is guilty of throwing spiders at people who seem to lose their minds!" "Well.. we can charge him for the crime of assault." "What of the spiders?" "We don't have any laws about throwing spiders. Charge him for the assault and move on!" "Shouldn't we confiscate the spiders from his loins?" "Why would we do that? You offering to do it?"

*guard sees man flying on a bucket* Guard: "I'm going home now"

The Dragonborn just wants a quiet life

you know, ive never given it any thought before, but I just realized, considering you made your character look like Killer Queen, you knew you where gonna use the spider explosives from the get go, which raises my respect for the amount of work that goes in these videos, as that means you either a) had this all planned out and still did all the extra shit, or b) you did multiple playthroughs, one where you tried out all this, and the one that we get to see

"Buying gf" in runescape text.. bringing back old memories.

Dragonborn: _Rises through the ranks of the Brotherhood without taking a single life._ Night Mother: *_Wait, that's illegal._*

The time when Bethesda releases a glitchless game will be a tragedy for us all

Random dud: “nO yOu cAn’t jUst paCifIst tHe dArk BroTherHood” ymfah: *Hold my spiders*

17:22 You can hear Heart Attack's creeping noise in the background, I love it

"Completed: speak to Astrid Objective updated: Conduct an STD test" The little details.

"Have you heard of the High Elves?" DAMN THIS GETS ME EVERYTIME

I fell off my chair on that "Why are you here? JUST TO SUFFER

I've watched this video five times and I just realized that the reason why the mind control spider is called heirophant spider is because of heirophants mind control ability that's used like once throughout JoJo jesus christ that's clever

So you are going to complete the dark brotherhood questline without killing anyone Ymfah: well yes, but actually, no

This is one of the best edited things I've ever seen.

I managed the abandoned shack part with Courage spell and Targe of the Blooded. I think they have only 1HP so they die instantly normally. Courage increases their health, and then shield bash allows enough time for bleeding effect to finish them off.

You should use netch jelly more, it paralyzes you so you can negate 100% of fall damage if you eat it right before you hit the ground

Thieves guild: hey we need help Ymfah: have you tried not stealing College of winterhold: hey we need help Ymfah: have you tried no magic Dark brotherhood: he we need help Ymfah: have you tried- Dark Brotherhood: yeah we know not kill- Ymfah: SPIDERS Dark Brotherhood: *jojo's intensifies*

Dark Brotherhood: So you want to kill people for a living ymfah: Well yes but actually no

I like how the restrictions of the challenge actually come across like weird stand rules. The bit at 10:30 especially.

“Oh he’s going to have people kill themsel- Killer Queen had already touched the spider

"Killer Queen has already touched the doorknob" *child screaming*

Pacifist, Definition: Someone who uses zero violence. Video: *Throws spiders at people, to force them to hurt others.* Seems legit. XP

Ymfah : pickpocket *get caught* Red spiders : Get him boys

I know you wont probably see this, but i just want to say that your channel was a great discover for me. Jojoreferences everytime, ridicoulously high skills and knowledge about the games you cover in these videos, some of them my favorite games of all time (Fallout, Elder Scrolls...), and great video editing and sense of humor that makes them very enjoyable. channels like this give me hope that there is still quality content on RU-vid.

Astrid: * is lying on the floor, burned to a crisp, barely alive, asking for death * Dragonborn: * steals something * Astrid: * leaps to feet immediately, arms raised for fisticuffs * OI MATE UR CRUISIN FOR A BRUISIN

「STAND MASTER」 Killer Queen Requiem 「STAND NAME」 Eye of the Spider 「ABILITY」 Living a quiet life

"What is this madness?! Rexus! HELP ME!" Rexus: *Proceeds to run him through with a greatsword*

24:05 Astrid was literally burned alive and barely has the strength to stay alive, let alone get up. *Until she gets reverse pickpocketed*

"I'll never tell you the location of the gourmet" 5 seconds later "This a exactly where he is and what he looks like"

I love how even in the “pacifist” playthrough Cicero dies

You are gifted as an editor, and you constantly leave me with a sense of awe.

I absolutely loved this video. Your cuts are excellently done and every meme you incorporated was a gem. Keep doin what youre doin cuz its got me subscribed 👌👌👌