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How to seek forgiveness when relationships are on the line | Peder Tellefsdal | TEDxArendal 

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Have you ever thought about forgiveness as a gamechanger?
Peder Tellefsdal believes that what we do in small, we do in large.
We all want to be forgiven for our screw-ups. The problem is we’re taught how to forgive others, but not how to ask for it ourselves. Peder Tellefsdal learned this the hard way. For many years he lived a double life: respected political advisor by day, “Party Peder” by night. When his guilt and regret finally pulled him into a deep hole of despair, he embarked on a “forgiveness road trip” - to take responsibility for his actions, one small act at a time. We are what we do, not what we say. And in this talk, Peder shares the tools he discovered to truly own our screw-ups when relationships are on the line. Peder Tellefsdal believes that what we do in small, we do in large.
For 12 years he worked as a political advisor, shaping reforms and advising politicians on media and public debates. Today he’s a Senior Communications Advisor and partner at Innoventi. In both fields he discovered the power of trust - not just building it, but practicing it in the small, daily moments.
On the stage at TEDxArendal, Peder will explore another “small” practice: the power of asking for forgiveness. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

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15 дек 2022

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Комментарии : 813   
@theothersideofego
@theothersideofego Год назад
A wonderful talk, that highlights the greatest truth. I had a wonderful opportunity to discuss forgiveness with Peder, and I openly admit he has learned this powerful lesson far sooner in life than I did. Bravo my friend Bravo!
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Thank you so much! Made my day 😀
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
@Martelle Benck Thank you! I appreciate that. If the talk may provide any help, nothing makes me happier ❤
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
@@codyvelardo400 I agree. We should focus more on the building blocks of any deep, long-lasting relationship
@Benjamin-yh9mr
@Benjamin-yh9mr Год назад
Forgiveness is always the way, well that is what I think at least
@DrishtiRaval17
@DrishtiRaval17 Год назад
its comments like these that make me happy
@KozomoBlur
@KozomoBlur 7 месяцев назад
To me this talk isn't just about forgiveness, but about how powerful and transformative it is when you acknowledge your patterns of bad behavior, to yourself and those around you.
@maddoxreynolds
@maddoxreynolds Год назад
The 'Party Peter' story was a real wake-up call for me, it made me think about how I act in my life.
@yaboimike940
@yaboimike940 Год назад
I was touched by the message of the importance of owning up to our actions and seeking forgiveness. His words will stay with me for a long time.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
@Jody Kupferer such a generous feedback! Thank you ❤
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
@Christos Amorim yes, that’s the key to truly asking for forgiveness. May be life-changing. And it is the opportunity we have to discover the most valuable gifts of all: Grace
@caroldendy851
@caroldendy851 Год назад
It was for me too!
@fionatruscott
@fionatruscott Год назад
Me too, loved that bit
@gretaallison
@gretaallison 7 месяцев назад
The practice of forgiveness in small moments is a valuable lesson. It's these daily actions that shape our character and relationships.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal 5 месяцев назад
Word!!
@noaholiverauthentic
@noaholiverauthentic 6 месяцев назад
Peder's dad's response to his request for forgiveness is heartwarming. It shows the power of forgiveness in healing relationships and restoring trust
@stanhopeishere
@stanhopeishere 6 месяцев назад
Absolutely, my emotions definitely welled up at that point haha
@nickgravygraves
@nickgravygraves 6 месяцев назад
Such an amazing moment, even more so when you realize his father was waiting for that moment
@booba00garde91
@booba00garde91 6 месяцев назад
The idea that forgiveness changes the future, not the past, really resonates with me. It's a reminder that we have the power to shape our own destinies when it comes to those around us who we love.
@Jane_epstein_author
@Jane_epstein_author Год назад
"Forgiveness doesn't change the past, but it does change the future." Such a powerful talk, honest and vulnerable, and wise. Words like "grace, authentic, all in." Peder, thank you.
@pederplaysguitar
@pederplaysguitar Год назад
Thank you so much for those kind words! ❤
@gilliandunn5087
@gilliandunn5087 Год назад
a beautiful quote
@pierrevilleneu
@pierrevilleneu 10 месяцев назад
What about those words?
@annemery885
@annemery885 9 месяцев назад
Yeah lol I'm curious to know what she means too @@pierrevilleneu
@coopertubner
@coopertubner 8 месяцев назад
@@pierrevilleneu 🤭
@therealmariorossi
@therealmariorossi Год назад
I think the worst lie we can tell ourselves is that it's only the big moments that matter, that it's okay to do the wrong thing when it's just something small. But it all adds up, and essentially we're training ourselves to do the wrong thing with all those little moments.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Totally! We should practice in small the actions we would like to characterize us when the heat is on. No one are masters of forgiveness by nature. It takes practice. And it is a gamechanger in relationships
@bazzadexter
@bazzadexter Год назад
Wow, yeah, I've never thought of it like that but that's a really good point. All of it matters.
@pierrevilleneu
@pierrevilleneu 10 месяцев назад
I agree. A very dangerous lie.
@b0i-oh-bOi
@b0i-oh-bOi Год назад
Asking to be forgiven by someone you've hurt or disappointed is crucial for a healthy relationship to continue but the essential ingredient is sincerity... Without that it's just words. And people can tell.
@chandrazu1085
@chandrazu1085 Год назад
sometimes even with that, it's just words. nobody is guaranteed to actually forgive you
@Buzzapper
@Buzzapper Год назад
Yes I have heard a lot of inauthentic sorry's
@annemery885
@annemery885 9 месяцев назад
That's a really good point. People can definitely tell and honestly if you don't mean it, or if you don't understand why you've hurt that person you just shouldn't even bother with an apology
@bjdogg
@bjdogg 5 месяцев назад
The way he talks about his dad is so beautiful. You can tell there's a lot of respect and admiration there.
@LifeLolling
@LifeLolling 5 месяцев назад
Yeah not exactly typical for people these days.
@konglum
@konglum 5 месяцев назад
@@LifeLolling I don't know if that's true. Most of the people I know respect their fathers, more so than their mothers anyway.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal 5 месяцев назад
We now have a closer relationship than ever before. All because of grace :)
@ThereAreBetterWays
@ThereAreBetterWays 5 месяцев назад
@@LifeLolling That's a really awful generalization
@ThereAreBetterWays
@ThereAreBetterWays 5 месяцев назад
@@konglum That's also a pretty awfuI thing to say
@sepchaster
@sepchaster Год назад
You should always be willing to take responsibility for your mistakes, even when the relationship _isn't_ on the line. No one's perfect and if people want to drag out your suffering after you've sought to make amends then they aren't really the kind of people you want in your life anyway.
@tommyruk
@tommyruk Год назад
Sep, thats right on, captured my thoughts too!
@yuvallove
@yuvallove Год назад
If only more people would own what they say, the world would be a better place.
@dextersalinas
@dextersalinas Год назад
so well-said!
@brittaniecrum
@brittaniecrum Год назад
This talk is a reminder of the power each of us hold to make the world a better place.
@annemery885
@annemery885 9 месяцев назад
I don't know if it would be a better place but it would definitely be a more authentic place lol@@yuvallove
@andrealfifi
@andrealfifi 6 месяцев назад
Granting forgiveness to someone who doesn't deserve it is a profound act of generosity.
@AngelightArc
@AngelightArc 4 месяца назад
Yes, it's an act of Grace.
@emmastandish
@emmastandish Год назад
Ooooh I love the backdrop that's happening here!
@CarissaTilson
@CarissaTilson Год назад
A friend of mine who works with a program in our country that helps men tackle their non-physical v!iolent outbursts and he always tells me "they think saying they're sorry solves everything when in reality, it can takes years of consistent work and proof of change of behaviour before they'll receive the support they crave from their loved ones" - which truly is so sad for both them and their loved ones and quite often results in regressing back to frustrated outbursts. Very good advice here Peder.
@juanlsalazar
@juanlsalazar Год назад
cool program!
@thisismindfulness
@thisismindfulness Год назад
sometimes family is created when we get comfort from others.
@rickygrays
@rickygrays 8 месяцев назад
I think Peder really nails it in terms of explaining the importance of consistency when practicing morality. Like he says it's not about the grand gestures but the daily choices we make, hence the saying "Character is what you do when no one is watching."
@ElisendaPliego
@ElisendaPliego 5 месяцев назад
The quote serves as a powerful reminder that true character is not defined by external appearances or the opinions of others, but by the choices we make when we think no one is watching.
@AlinaPalacio
@AlinaPalacio 5 месяцев назад
It implies that acts of kindness, honesty, and compassion performed when no one is watching are a testament to the depth of our character.
@AllegriaIadanza
@AllegriaIadanza 5 месяцев назад
The quote encourages individuals to strive for consistency between their public and private behavior, aligning their actions with their professed values.
@ZarinaGonzalez-mp1rh
@ZarinaGonzalez-mp1rh 5 месяцев назад
It suggests that the choices we make when no one is watching reflect our true nature and the depth of our commitment to ethical behavior.
@BrunaRocha-im7in
@BrunaRocha-im7in 5 месяцев назад
The quote reminds us that integrity and authenticity are fundamental components of character, as they are revealed in our private moments.
@juniorjacksonjr
@juniorjacksonjr 7 месяцев назад
It's really never too late to change and seek forgiveness. His story is a testament to the human capacity for growth and redemption.
@iamlaylathomas
@iamlaylathomas Год назад
The stuff about his father at the end is so beautiful.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Yeah, that was a game-changer. The two paintings are my most beloved personal belongings.
@stanhopeishere
@stanhopeishere 6 месяцев назад
I like the idea of going "all-in" on forgiveness. Better than doing it with something destructive.
@omkar2485
@omkar2485 Год назад
I think it's very easy for us to forget the part about having to practice at doing the right thing. Not because of our 'capacity for bad' but because sometimes thinking beyond ourselves can be a bit tricky, especially when we're out of practice.
@phillambrick
@phillambrick Год назад
Never be out of practice, just keep practicing
@brittaniecrum
@brittaniecrum Год назад
we cannot ever forget what we have the ability to make better.
@nickgravygraves
@nickgravygraves 6 месяцев назад
This is a good point, makes sense of why some people feel so awkward and uncomfortable about apologising.
@rongigz
@rongigz 7 месяцев назад
The idea of practicing forgiveness, even for the small moments, is profound. It's a way to continually strengthen our capacity for good and build stronger relationships.
@CheakinaCopeland
@CheakinaCopeland 5 месяцев назад
Practicing morality involves actively engaging in acts of kindness, generosity, and compassion, fostering a sense of community and interconnectedness with others.
@SteevieMatthews
@SteevieMatthews 5 месяцев назад
It requires individuals to be respectful and considerate in their interactions with others, valuing their autonomy and treating them with dignity.
@RhaelynCharles
@RhaelynCharles 5 месяцев назад
Practicing morality involves being honest with oneself, acknowledging one's own flaws and shortcomings, and striving for self-improvement.
@KalaPope
@KalaPope 5 месяцев назад
It requires individuals to be aware of their own biases and prejudices, and to actively seek out diverse perspectives and experiences.
@DandriaPerkins
@DandriaPerkins 5 месяцев назад
It requires individuals to resist the temptation to engage in gossip, slander, or harmful speech, and instead promote understanding and constructive dialogue.
@chezravvy
@chezravvy Год назад
"Doing the right thing takes practice." THIS! I think we easily forgot that people who consistently do the right thing have WORKED FOR IT like a skill that gets honed.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Totally! Unfortunately, this timeless wisdom is not too present in today’s mainstream culture
@lakylewashington
@lakylewashington Год назад
There's something so pure and beautiful about the way he talks about his relationship with his father.
@kashaiq
@kashaiq Год назад
It is really beautiful isn't it?
@anonisanonymous
@anonisanonymous 10 месяцев назад
It takes immense courage to face those we've hurt, take responsibility, and ask for forgiveness. It's a humbling journey that can lead to healing and growth.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal 10 месяцев назад
Totally, it’s transformational! Thanks for commenting
@annemery885
@annemery885 9 месяцев назад
Absolutely. Though I don't know how we've trained ourselves to hide from our mistakes and those we've hurt instead of just owning up to it
@earlbannicek5766
@earlbannicek5766 Год назад
Yes absolutely and it's incredibly frustrating when people expect forgiveness without having ever taken responsibility for what they've done - or worse, making an excuses for their shhtty behaviour that you just can't argue with otherwise YOU come across as being unreasonable.
@emmastandish
@emmastandish Год назад
so true, agree 100%
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Word!
@caroldendy851
@caroldendy851 Год назад
finally watched, thanks for the link..
@fionatruscott
@fionatruscott Год назад
forgive yourself first
@emmastandish
@emmastandish Год назад
@@fionatruscott great point
@elainarogers
@elainarogers Год назад
Conversations, especially difficult ones with your boss, co-workers, spouse and family can be cathartic and benefit everyone.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Yes, it’s hard. But, like you say, potentially cathartic. Most important stuff in life comes with a price
@moneymaker324
@moneymaker324 8 месяцев назад
Peder's story is a testament to the power of redemption and second chances. It's a reminder that no matter how lost we may feel, we can always find our way back.
@nickgravygraves
@nickgravygraves 6 месяцев назад
I get what you mean, when someone gives you a second chance it makes you so appreciative it's unlikely you'll ever take the relationship for granted again
@scottvboland
@scottvboland Год назад
Agree with you Peder. Taking responsibility for my actions and asking for forgiveness with sincerity is essential for me when I've screwed up.
@theothersideofego
@theothersideofego Год назад
agree with that Scott
@xanderselester
@xanderselester 2 месяца назад
There is something so relatable about this. In a world where we're responsible for our own happiness, it takes a lot of courage and resolve to self-correct such deep mistakes.
@julianfritzer
@julianfritzer 11 месяцев назад
Self-pity and blaming others won't lead to change. Taking responsibility for our actions is scary but necessary and actions always speak louder than words. It's not enough to talk about being better just as it's not enough to merely "say" sorry. We need to regularly practice gratitude for our loved ones and doing the right thing by them to show them that they matter and are appreciated.
@adammayhew
@adammayhew 11 месяцев назад
I don't think he is blaming others?
@superduperthedoug
@superduperthedoug Год назад
"we are what we do, not what we say." 💯💯💯💯💯
@emmashubert
@emmashubert 3 месяца назад
The idea that taking responsibility is scary really resonates. It's a brave move to face our mistakes and work towards change because it forces us to grow as people.
@skyec8562
@skyec8562 3 месяца назад
Absolutely but it does seem strange to be scared of taking that responsibility. It's far more likely we've made ourselves feel more terrible about it than the person we're admitting things to ever would
@TheCookieAngel
@TheCookieAngel 9 месяцев назад
Peder's story is proof positive that we can stop deluding ourselves, admit responsibility for past wrongs and seek forgiveness from those we've harmed.
@nancycejarimanifestingfrom
@nancycejarimanifestingfrom Год назад
I love it! We are so blind to only reward the big things but the small will leads us for greatness, do not believe what we see in social media about what greatness is, greatness is simple as asking for forgiveness ! Thank you for this!
@pederplaysguitar
@pederplaysguitar Год назад
Thank you! 🎉 So cool you liked it!
@scottzsanders
@scottzsanders 7 месяцев назад
I think staying humble and respectful in relationships is the key to understanding. Then if you do need forgiveness it's easy to grant.
@ThePoetopia
@ThePoetopia 3 месяца назад
It's fascinating how Peter highlights the loss of moral language. Reclaiming it is not just about words but about rediscovering the depth and nuance of our moral experiences.
@brianmillerspeaks
@brianmillerspeaks Год назад
A beautiful, moving tribute to the power of asking for forgiveness and how it bonds us together, especially when it counts.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Thank you so much!
@miyahnna
@miyahnna Год назад
I saw your TEDx as well, very good.
@alantcase
@alantcase Год назад
What he's talking about it so underrated, when you come to a loved one acknowledging something you've done wrong and give them the opportunity to address it together your relationship levels up so drastically.
@busterbeansishere
@busterbeansishere Год назад
It really is, more focus on forgiveness would solve a lot of issues.
@bulldogggg
@bulldogggg Год назад
I always tell people that by being open and honest we are actually giving less fuel to those voices that tell us we are not good enough. Because if we are consistently aware of our shortcomings, they feel like less of a problem,
@keeserevin
@keeserevin Год назад
Peder's willingness to change and the way he just owned up to everyone in his life is a real inspiration.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Thank you! My "forgiveness Roadtrip" is by far the most essential and valuable trip I've ever embarked on
@pierrevilleneu
@pierrevilleneu 10 месяцев назад
Yes but I think it's important to remember that he hit a rock bottom before that willingness happened
@levshalazar
@levshalazar Год назад
So tough at the 6:07 mark going from wanting to share your life to wanting to hide it. Especially from a parent when so often all we want is their approval and pride.
@regina-reda
@regina-reda Год назад
that sounds like me.
@robertjoinersr
@robertjoinersr Год назад
A pure and simple message, thank you Peder.
@margotaylor-ritchie5937
@margotaylor-ritchie5937 Год назад
thanks for sending me this
@jeanetteward
@jeanetteward Год назад
thanks Robert, got the link
@LA-pj5so
@LA-pj5so 6 месяцев назад
The firefighter example was a really good one
@Stuckallthetime
@Stuckallthetime 4 месяца назад
The idea of consistently training ourselves to do the right thing, even in small moments, is powerful.
@budwebb
@budwebb 4 месяца назад
I can see how the end game is powerful but to be constantly looking for things you need to say sorry for sounds pretty tiring
@BrutalTechGiant
@BrutalTechGiant 4 месяца назад
@@budwebb You don't need to be looking for things to say sorry for, just observe your own behavior and see where there's room to improve
@sariyah7175
@sariyah7175 3 месяца назад
Peder's openness about despising himself is so relatable. It takes courage to admit when we've hit rock bottom. I hope more people find inspiration in his journey to seek change.
@NoisyDusty
@NoisyDusty 3 месяца назад
It does take courage but I think it gets easier to talk about in the past tense
@NoisyDusty
@NoisyDusty 3 месяца назад
As in, once you've started to build yourself back up, it's easy to say hey that was my lowest point
@berniesbiggestfan
@berniesbiggestfan 9 месяцев назад
Peder's journey is a testament to the power of personal growth and transformation. By acknowledging his mistakes, seeking forgiveness, and going all in, he was able to rebuild his life and nurture meaningful relationships.
@franhustard
@franhustard 9 месяцев назад
Mmmmmmmm yup that is one way to look at it
@chelseasavage5990
@chelseasavage5990 2 месяца назад
His dad sounds like such a great role model. Offering jobs and opening their home to those in need is a testament to the impact we can have when we actively practice kindness and generosity.
@jensjfriedemann
@jensjfriedemann Год назад
the idea of asking for forgiveness is still pretty scary for me, but this definitely helps me rethink how I should deal with my regrets.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
I’m glad to hear that! Asking for forgiveness is surely a way to strenghten our potential for good
@lucy-diamonds
@lucy-diamonds Год назад
Wow what a life you've led Peder! Thank you for sharing it with us and showing just how important all of this stuff is.
@caroldendy851
@caroldendy851 Год назад
well said
@publictvfan9913
@publictvfan9913 Год назад
Can definitely relate to that "all-in" personality type he talks about having... it's hard not to fixate
@markheichorn
@markheichorn 8 месяцев назад
Peder's emphasis on reclaiming the language of morality resonates strongly. Words have power, and having a rich vocabulary to express our moral struggles allows for deeper introspection and more meaningful conversations. Let's explore ways to revive and reinvent this vital aspect of human communication.
@iamtheyesmanallthetime
@iamtheyesmanallthetime Год назад
"forgiveness doesn't change the past, but it changes the future" Thanks Peder for that take home message.
@SmartThrill
@SmartThrill Год назад
yes an apology certainly goes a long way to help with the healing process
@asiscranda
@asiscranda Год назад
I love that quote. great stuff
@denisgongolev
@denisgongolev 9 месяцев назад
It's incredible how Peder recognized his all-in nature, both its positive and negative sides. It's a testament to his growth that he decided to channel that intensity towards developing his capacity for good.
@bettygould3679
@bettygould3679 9 месяцев назад
I love the idea of not just throwing out the problematic aspects of your personality and instead finding a way to turn them towards something more constructive
@The-Secret-Garden
@The-Secret-Garden 8 месяцев назад
@@bettygould3679 This is a really nice sentiment. I don't know how possible it is for everyone though... some aspects are more damaging than others.
@waltersiegismund
@waltersiegismund 10 месяцев назад
"Actions speak louder than words" is a powerful reminder from Peder. Merely talking about doing the right thing is not enough; we must practice it consistently. It's the small daily moments that shape our character and prepare us for the big moments.
@Soul-Dragon-Master
@Soul-Dragon-Master 10 месяцев назад
The notion of "own your scrubs, ask for forgiveness, go all in" captures the essence of Peder's journey.
@annemery885
@annemery885 9 месяцев назад
Yeah it's a good synapsis
@nickgravygraves
@nickgravygraves 6 месяцев назад
As someone with a very addictive personality, I find it difficult to _not_ go "all-in" on something, so this talk really, really resonates with me.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal 5 месяцев назад
Thank you! So glad to hear that :) Then there's two of us..
@saturnsrings3608
@saturnsrings3608 4 месяца назад
Maybe you can go all-in on forgiveness? 🤣🤣
@gog-gog
@gog-gog 7 месяцев назад
It's nice to hear a story about someone living that lifestyle and coming back from it.
@mathewgee6259
@mathewgee6259 Год назад
I think an important part of this is to realize that the relationship is on the line in the first place. If you've carried yourself in a way where you don't recognize the need to apologize you're probably also unaware of how the other person is feeling in general - and that they might be at the end of their tether to you
@shayneb226
@shayneb226 Год назад
if it comes to something like that I think the best thing to do is part
@tuckerr2165
@tuckerr2165 Год назад
lately it has been a lot tougher to get into a normal relationship
@DrishtiRaval17
@DrishtiRaval17 Год назад
I think 90% of apologizing happes just because there is something to be lost
@yaboimike940
@yaboimike940 Год назад
We all need to work toward being better people, when you want someone's forgiveness,
@fortunaterbush8607
@fortunaterbush8607 Год назад
You’re the only true person I’ve found that I feel I can connect to.. I admire you so much! ❤
@adam-cooper
@adam-cooper 3 месяца назад
The way his dad went beyond belief and took real action is truly admirable. A great reminder that actions speak louder than words.
@sammyllee
@sammyllee Год назад
I can totally relate to him hiding his sugar fix from his wife, only to feel guilty and tell her any way. Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy.
@tobiaskulik
@tobiaskulik 7 месяцев назад
What strikes me is his unwavering commitment to change. It's not a sudden transformation but a consistent effort to reclaim his true self.
@glennhamilton3rd
@glennhamilton3rd 7 месяцев назад
Absolutely, small but constant steps to self-improvement.
@glennhamilton3rd
@glennhamilton3rd 7 месяцев назад
Seems a lot more manageable than trying to make one huge change
@bettygould3679
@bettygould3679 9 месяцев назад
The importance of focusing less on what we say and more on what we do cannot be overstated. Taking action, practicing forgiveness, and using the 'language of morality' opens the door to profound human experiences and connections.
@carlajaffe
@carlajaffe Год назад
Yes Peder YOU are responsible for your salvation and happiness. No one is going to knock on the door and hand it to you on a plate.
@skyec8562
@skyec8562 3 месяца назад
The vulnerability in his admission of self-despise is so powerful and I admire him for it very much.
@dante-cruz
@dante-cruz 3 месяца назад
I love the emphasis on taking responsibility for change. It's not just about acknowledging mistakes but actively working towards becoming a better person. Maybe if we can learn to see it that way more people will take accountability in a positive way.
@asherPreynolds
@asherPreynolds 10 месяцев назад
The evolving language of morality doesn't necessarily indicate a decline in moral consciousness but rather an evolution in how we communicate our values. Language is a dynamic tool, and we have the power to shape and adapt it to express our moral convictions in meaningful ways.
@annemery885
@annemery885 9 месяцев назад
This, absolutely this. I don't think enough people understand that language is fluid, it changes and grows at the same pace that society does, and we've come a long way in a short time, it makes sense that our language does the same.
@TheRubenZepeda
@TheRubenZepeda 7 месяцев назад
His struggles and his journey to seek forgiveness is incredibly brave. It takes courage to confront our own shortcomings.
@glennhamilton3rd
@glennhamilton3rd 7 месяцев назад
Absolutely, you have to be brave enough to accept that it's time to hold yourself to a higher standard
@laurenstynes
@laurenstynes 7 месяцев назад
Yes, courage and a real desire to change
@therealjuanschmidt
@therealjuanschmidt 2 месяца назад
This talk is a reminder that even in our darkest moments, there's a path towards self-discovery and redemption and there's something amazing about people who have hit rock bottom and then dragged themselves back out
@kaymitchell4935
@kaymitchell4935 Год назад
it can be very scary to be vulnerable like this, but it's worthwhile
@ThePackHunter
@ThePackHunter 9 месяцев назад
The story of Peder's final visit to his dad was truly heartwarming.
@bigfatfather
@bigfatfather Год назад
Authentic communication and being completely transparent can really be a game changer in any dynamic, usually for the better.
@jordyndejong
@jordyndejong Год назад
it can be so difficult though! so much respect to people who dedicate themselves to that approach
@jessiesangster
@jessiesangster 7 месяцев назад
It's amazing to me how different people view things like this differently. Just ask. Put aside the ego. Value the relationship first.
@guntherhofer
@guntherhofer 11 месяцев назад
The need for a shared language of morality is crucial in our society. Without it, we struggle to express our inner struggles and seek understanding from others.
@glennhamilton3rd
@glennhamilton3rd 7 месяцев назад
I really enjoyed hearing about his journey from 'Party Peder' to a more responsible and self-aware version of himself. It really speaks to the possibilities of change, no matter how far you've strayed from your values.
@arnoldcintron1621
@arnoldcintron1621 7 месяцев назад
That is a great way to think of it
@laurenstynes
@laurenstynes 7 месяцев назад
That is a really nice message to take away from it
@realdelilahjones
@realdelilahjones Год назад
"Forgiveness doesn't change the past but it does change the future." This is spot on.
@fionatruscott
@fionatruscott 9 месяцев назад
Absolutely, there are so many quotable lines in this talk
@TheSoundOffNow
@TheSoundOffNow Год назад
Looking his boss in the eyes and admitting his misdemeanours took courage - well done to you, Peder. Your boss is clearly empathetic and values you.
@MochaPundit
@MochaPundit Год назад
Yeah absolutely, could have easily gone a different way
@sylviacrittendon
@sylviacrittendon 9 месяцев назад
Peder's mention of grace is profound. When someone grants forgiveness even when we don't deserve it, it's a beautiful and transformative experience. Let's remember the power of grace in our relationships and extend it to others when possible.
@franhustard
@franhustard 9 месяцев назад
Isn't that literally one of the definitions of grace? A gift given that isn't deserved?
@sylviacrittendon
@sylviacrittendon 9 месяцев назад
​@@franhustard I don't know if that's a definition of the word but to do so would be an act of grace, in my opinion, anyway.
@arnoldcintron1621
@arnoldcintron1621 7 месяцев назад
Grace is a beautiful thing. When someone forgives you even when you don't deserve it, it can change your future.
@glennhamilton3rd
@glennhamilton3rd 7 месяцев назад
I think it can even change how you feel about yourself.
@iamacatslave
@iamacatslave 8 месяцев назад
Peder's journey from 'Party Peder' to a more responsible and self-aware person is truly inspiring. It shows that change is possible for anyone, no matter how far they've strayed from their values.
@BrutalTechGiant
@BrutalTechGiant 4 месяца назад
Seems like the relationship he had with his Dad really made all the difference in terms of getting his life back on track. Makes me think of all the men out there who grew up without fathers and it's no wonder they get so wayward
@PoetWithPace
@PoetWithPace Год назад
Great talk Peder. Thank you for sharing! I like the all in with chocolate. No guilt required.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Thank you! 😊
@cilecarlton
@cilecarlton 11 месяцев назад
Asking for forgiveness is a skill we should practice regularly. It's not just for big moments but also for the small daily choices we make.
@janetpannel
@janetpannel 11 месяцев назад
I don't think you need to take it that far. A skill? Practice regularly? No. I think just, treat people in a way that honors your feelings and intentions towards them.
@TheMassNova
@TheMassNova 3 месяца назад
The call to reclaim the language of morality is crucial. Without it, our ability to communicate the impact of our inner struggles will never be accurate enough.
@skyec8562
@skyec8562 3 месяца назад
I disagree. There are lots of words out there, doesn't have to have a biblical reference to have strong connotations
@newcenturyboy
@newcenturyboy 3 месяца назад
The part where Peder talks about dulling the pain with classic strategies hit me hard. It's a raw and honest account of how we sometimes cope with our struggles, and how, when they're unhealthy like this and just a distraction from the pain, it ends up consuming us and ultimately adding to our struggles. Breaking free from these habits is a journey worth taking
@thrasherjoe
@thrasherjoe 8 месяцев назад
Peder is like living proof of how our actions speak louder than words. It's not enough to say we want to change; we have to practice it daily, just as he did.
@allwiseelvisisme
@allwiseelvisisme 3 месяца назад
The story about his dad offering jobs and helping refugees is genuinely inspiring. It makes you reflect on the power of real, tangible actions in making a positive change in the world.
@mateomardenson3022
@mateomardenson3022 11 месяцев назад
The story of 'Party Peder' reminds us of the importance of self-reflection. It takes courage to confront our flaws and seek help to change for the better.
@bobskillings113
@bobskillings113 11 месяцев назад
It does yes and also important to remember nothing is too far beyond repair
@magnusseverson
@magnusseverson Год назад
My high school English teacher said to me "the road to heII is paved with good intentions". We all mean to do the right thing but it's far too easy to just turn the other way when we miss the mark, that's why taking ownership in this way counts for so much.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal Год назад
Totally! I like to think of character building as exercising 😊
@koalakamishere
@koalakamishere 2 месяца назад
We all have the power to take responsibility for the lasting changes we want to make in our lives 💜
@waltbleyer8736
@waltbleyer8736 Год назад
You can forgive, but the main thing is to never forget, that is my moto
@robertjoinersr
@robertjoinersr Год назад
mine too.
@ErinKalshaw
@ErinKalshaw 11 месяцев назад
When forgiveness is granted even when we don't deserve it, it shows us the power of grace. It's a beautiful gift that can transform relationships
@pierrevilleneu
@pierrevilleneu 10 месяцев назад
That is a beautiful description of what grace can be.
@dpesca
@dpesca 6 месяцев назад
love when this talk comes up, I get something different from it every time I watch it
@TheRealLunaTech
@TheRealLunaTech 5 месяцев назад
Love is and always will be the answer, bless this man!!!!!
@konglum
@konglum 5 месяцев назад
No. Sorry. This is not the case.
@IllustriousDoom
@IllustriousDoom 11 месяцев назад
Actions speak louder than words. Merely talking about doing the right thing isn't enough; we must practice it consistently.
@janetpannel
@janetpannel 11 месяцев назад
An oldie but a goodie.
@edgartestrada
@edgartestrada 10 месяцев назад
@@janetpannel It's a saying that's lasted this long for a reason
@selitudenow
@selitudenow 5 месяцев назад
Just because you ask for forgiveness doesn't mean you deserve it. The honesty in that statement hit hard. Forgiveness is a gift, not an entitlement.
@mikehweaver
@mikehweaver 4 месяца назад
Agreed. Sometimes we have to give that gift to ourselves
@budwebb
@budwebb 4 месяца назад
@@mikehweaver Is it okay to forgive yourself for something if the person you did it to hasn't forgiven you?
@stewynotthedog
@stewynotthedog 4 месяца назад
@@budwebb this is an interesting question, I'd love to know that as well
@00Zeropie00
@00Zeropie00 11 месяцев назад
Opening up our homes and offering jobs to those in need, like the narrator's dad, exemplifies true compassion and doing the right thing. It's inspiring to hear such stories of selflessness.
@janetpannel
@janetpannel 11 месяцев назад
Inspiring yes but it also made me a little sad, I don't know that many people have the means to offer things like that to those in need anymore. Maybe where Peders from, I'm not sure.
@sanderburton
@sanderburton Год назад
Man I have to be honest here, when he talks about how it's the small moments that matter just as much as the big ones I felt a bit confronted. That's definitely not how I've been living my life.
@darioconsolata8691
@darioconsolata8691 10 месяцев назад
Peder, thank you for reminding us that forgiveness is not only for big moments but also for small ones is a valuable insight. It's in these times that we are really able to align ourselves.
@pedertellefsdal
@pedertellefsdal 9 месяцев назад
Yes! Reading «Atomic Habits» now, and we are shaped by what we do in small. We should aim to make those small choices align with our greater, long-term goals
@arnoldcintron1621
@arnoldcintron1621 7 месяцев назад
Absolutely, we should never be afraid to ask for forgiveness
@arnoldcintron1621
@arnoldcintron1621 7 месяцев назад
Though hopefully we don't have to do it too much
@therealjordanisme
@therealjordanisme 5 месяцев назад
Taking responsibility is hard, but hey, so is life. This talk is just another reminder that we're all doomed to make the same mistakes over and over again.
@AngelightArc
@AngelightArc 4 месяца назад
That is most certainly not what this talk reminded me of. Perhaps you stopped paying attention and started projecting instead?
@charlottewebbnotthebook
@charlottewebbnotthebook 7 месяцев назад
I appreciate Peder's message that forgiveness doesn't change the past but it does change the future. It's a beautiful reminder of the transformative power of forgiveness.
@Charlize-Z
@Charlize-Z 9 месяцев назад
The importance of reclaiming the language of morality is highlighted here. Without the words to describe our inner struggles, it becomes difficult to understand ourselves and relate to others. Let's remember the power of articulating our feelings and experiences.
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