Imagine being stalked by one of these animals and the only thing you can think of is this mans voice telling you to say hi to your ancestors for him 😂😂😂
@@skylinefan4184 guns are no help. These animals can take it. Thats why they use much larger special guns to take them out and loads of bullets. I’m a nurse not a vet but humans and these large beats are not the same
My dad actually managed to survive a hippo attack, but it was definitely by pure luck. He was on a camping safari and got up in the morning to take a sunrise pucture. While he was adjusting his camera settings, he tilted the lens down and saw a hippo charging him. He was between it and the water, which is a sure way to anger one. He sprinted and managed to get behind and acacia tree. The hippo chased him around it, but because they don't have the best turning radius, my dad was able to stay just out of reach. Then, one of the camp cooks got up to make breakfast and realized what was happening. He yelled to distract the hippo and then shimmied up one of the spikey acacia trees when it charged him, giving my dad enough time to sprint back into his tent. So yeah, don't bother hippos, in or out of the water. And if you do, hope there's a tree.
"Don't pee around a tiger, it's a sign of disrespect" I'm sorry but if there's a tiger in deletion range, chances are I'm pissing myself. I'll see you at the gates
Bring a shotgun or High powered rifle at least (last resort is knife but then again if you reach this point, like what he said you probably won’t live anyways)
Depends if your gonna waste your time and shoot the bear, bring anything, it won’t work lel. If you want to listen to hood nature and use the gun on yourself before the bear reaches you, a pistol or any small firearm will do. Cus the mobility will make sure the bullet reaches you quickly enough
@@CountryLifestyle2023 bro if u think polar bears get scared by something charging ur wrong polar bears literally sre one of the animal species that actively hunt humans if u charge itll put u in ur place by destroying ur head
My dad was out camping with his boy scout troop when he was a kid and a bear cub ran straight through their campsite. Dad saw the bear cub yelled "Everyone scatter" (because mama is usually not far behind) only to realize he was the only one left in the campsite and everyone else had already ran.
Your dad is still the hero of this story because he was the only one looking out for his friends, everybody else just noped out without the slightest twinge of conscience X^)
Me seeing a moose 10ft away while camping as a little kid: "Oh wow, a moose, it's beautiful, that's so cool, damn it's big." Me remembering this: "Goddamn, I'm lucky I'm still around today."
I guess in some species the young have a petting pass. There was a comment around somewhere on a trip to an Australian Zoo. A little kid was left unsupervised by his or her parents and wondered off to the bird's exhibit. Turned out that same day somehow a Cassowary got out and the kid unaware about the power of the Death Emu, went up and pet it. The bird didn't attack, but people were shouting at the kid to get away from it. So yeah in this case it pays to be small and cute.
@@paleface171 reminds me of when I was a very little kid (still a toddler) I was always pretty small for my age... anyway my parents bought a bunch of geese from an auction house and they were HUGE and I was always scared of them and they would always chase me around and I was absolutely terrified and would run away crying...one day my escape wasn't so well executed because I tripped and fell... apparently they had no nefarious intent because once they finally caught up with my they all decided to sit on me like I was a giant egg.... Apparently they thought that I was just a weird looking gosling...anywho long story short I've loved geese ever since 🤦🤣
I work with geologists from around the world. One I worked with was from Canada and worked for the Provincial government of Alberta. Her job was to helicopter up to the headwaters of streams and hike down taking water samples periodically. SHE did this alone. I asked if she had a gun jokingly and she replied yes....she was issued a 38 special revolver with +p rounds. I asked if that was enough to take down a bear and she laughed and said "no silly, the gun was to take my life before the grizzly killed me".
That "don't run" part is REALLY important. I remember a long time ago reading a biography of an animal trainer and he talked about how the instinct to chase and kill things that run is on the level of reflex. He had a lion that was as friendly as a puppy around him, then one day he had to hurry somewhere and left just a little too fast and found himself on the ground. Pretty much any animal with sharp teeth and eyes at the front will 100% respond to a fast retreat with an even faster attack, and honestly may not even have control over it.
Yeah, it's crazy how little known this is. I was with my service dog and we found a cat after class. Stray cat, we have them ALL OVER campus, but this one was super tame. Well, I was cautious because a stray cat tried to attack my last dog a couple years ago, but I gently let my dog close. She was excited, but she at least tried to stay calm because the cat was calm. Well, I guess some people got scared that something would happen and _forced_ the cat away. This spooked the cat and caused it to run. Nearly threw me off my feet when my dog tried to bolt after it. All predatory animals, even the tamest ones like a young golden doodle who's never killed a thing bigger than a beetle in her life, have that instinct.
True, never run, I never have and there are much better chances of survival if you stand your ground qnd face the animal. It has worked for me when encountering dogs. Can't say I've been confronted by any other animals
@@Thawhid I know. ;-; We don't have cats at home, since my last one was stolen. She gets so few opportunities to meet with felines. I love them so much.
This is facts...im a long distance runner and jog twice a and the same dogs that I pass everyday twice a day chase after me everytime I run by them EVERYTIME but when I walk they submissive asf. It's their nature.
"Don't look a gorilla directly in the eyes or show your teeth." This is why babies cry when you smile at them or stare at them for too long. They're literally stuck still in Monke mode until we teach them to be human.
@@hollowtrappedinaelevator320 The afternoon rays penetrate the coniferous leaves and fall directly onto my face. They force my eyes to unfold, and I stare at my palms, still painted crimson from disciplining the infant. Instantly my mind floods with regret, but I try my best to discard it, knowing that my actions were necessary in order to preserve the great legacy that is mankind. It is too early, I must rest some more so that I will have the strength to carry out my nightly duties under the flourescent stars. As I drift into the subconscious realm a faint call echoes in the distance. It is a memory of my mother’s voice, weeping as she disposes of my newborn siblings. “There must only be one,” she cries softly. Only one...
My aunt did survive a hippo attack. The hippo literally bit their boat in half while my aunt her partner and their guide jumped off. Luckily it was more interested in chewing the boat, so they could get to the second boat right behind them and drive away. My aunt was the only one injured - two fingers of her left hand got caught on something when she jumped into the water. She got incredibly lucky a second time an could actually keep both these fingers. All she has today is an impressive scar.
I've ran into bears several times while hiking here in Canada. Two scariest... 1. Hiking beside a narrow river and right across it was a grizzly eating berries. It startled me, but probably heard me for quite a while. It just watched us walk past, thankfully. 2. West Coast Trail. I was in a crappy mood and walked ahead of my group when I came face-to-face with a black bear, no more than 3 metres apart in a little clearing. We both stopped. I started talking gently, trying not to crap myself or panic. We both backed up slowly. As soon as it moved away 3 or so metres the bear turned and ran. I just stayed there, leaning against a tree, waiting for my friends. Never left the group again. It was also on that trip that I learned that cougars will hunt otters. Saw some tracks that I thought were a mama and babies going down to the ocean, and when I told the Native guy who ran the ferry he enlightened me as to what the tracks were most likely. That's also when I found out otter and cougar tracks look a lot alike.
When I was very young (maybe four years old), I was picking wild blueberries with my dad, somewhere in the vicinity of Huntsville, Ontario. We were in a broad granite clearing with just a few taller bushes. About twenty minutes into the picking, we got near one of the bushes and a large black bear stood up on the other side of it - maybe five feet away. My dad said: "How's it going, bear?" in an even tone of voice. We backed slowly off, the bear backed slowly off and, when we got to opposite sides of the clearing (perhaps 100 feet apart), we both went back to berry picking. This particular bear was a prime-looking chonky boi, who already had a good layer of fat on him, and a calm, confident demeanour. I'm massively thankful that it wasn't leaner and more protective of its food source, or more jittery. In either case, we'd have had a much less productive day of berry-picking. 🤕 It's worth noting that this is going back a few decades, when we were still burning garbage in open pits, and bears were used to being in close proximity to humans at the dump, etc. Habituation is dangerous because it makes bears more willing to take risks in relation to humans - but it also made us far less scary to them. Nowadays, I carry bear spray like any rational human being. Never had to use it; hope I never do.
one tip: when chased by a polar bear you should throw pieces of clothing away. Polar bears are huge ADHD animals and will stop to sniff at the clothing. If that doesn't work at least you'll be frozen to death before you're cut to ribbons
@@natebrown90 Hmmm yeah, see I would agree this would work on grizzlies and black bears. But a polar bear will stop at the sound, and still run you down anyway. The clothes thing, I believe could work. I don't know how polar bears' sense of smell works but if it stops and decides it wants to smell your dirty ass clothes, you better hope your stinky pits entertains it or else you're going to cease existing.
whoever you heard say "make yourself look bigger" for a bear attack was talking about little black bears. Once I was sitting outside my motel room and a bear walked up behind me, and I stood up fast to turn around and see what it was and scared the shit out of that poor bear, he didn't even know I was there and I was 3 feet above him on a raised deck, he ran like the wind. For a black bear being loud and looking bigger does dissuade them, just not with a grizzly.
"How to survive a cougar attack: first you want to avoid happy hour at Applebee's, that's when they're most active and most dangerous. Now on to the cats..." Absolutely priceless and so smoothly delivered.
My dad was approached by a brown bear in Siberia when he was camping with his friends. It wasn’t really aggressive, but still tried to chase people away from the food so it could eat the leftovers. They managed to quickly get inside their car (bear even tried to open it) and my dad pressed a car honk, which scared the bear and it ran away. It was over a 35 years ago, but my dad is still really scared of bears and has nightmares about meeting them. Sometimes he even starts to yell at these imaginary bears at night in attempt to scare them, but only scares the s//it out of my mom 😂
They can’t depending on the tree. Their bodies are not designed for throwing down trees per se, the tree would have to be on a particularly unstable soil.
@@RaHELLaable You know what is interesting? Armadillo shells are bulletproof and in fact one Texas man was hospitalized after a bullet ricocheted of the animal
If its black: Might get away with it a good fight If its brown: Might get away with it by being a pussy and lay down If its white: Might get away with it by having the best trip youll ever have and for the first time seeing the light
My mom actually survived a moose attacking her without getting hurt! She was hiking in the forest and happens upon a mamma moose and her baby and she climbed up a bolder abd had to stay there for HOURS until the moose lost interest and she could leave. So all in all she was very lucky
I'm avoiding hiking, camping, safaris, the Amazon, the Sahara, Australia and the oceans. People where I'm from aren't the least bit interested in dancing with the devil in these places or with these activities.
I know this seems like a joke but what he’s doing is REALLY helpful. The amount of ppl I see every year in national parks tryna pet a moose is way too much so him spelling out how dangerous these animals are is great.
@Rkaale 123 yup there was the Benadryl challenge and the tide pod challenge and apparently at one point there was a “set yourself on fire” challenge but I have to do more research on that
Bro the jokes you make like "humans were smart enough to send a man to the moon but a chimp will send you to the news" something like that bro im tariffed and laughing my ass off 😂
I'll never get zombie stories with animal corpses that were left on the scene as if they were torn apart by zombies. What's a group of zombies going to do to a moose, chew on it with blunt teeth and scratch it with broken nails? If anything, a moose or a bear in a zombie movie should have sick action scenes like they're Dynasty Warriors characters comboing a horde of zombies.
"a moose should have sick action scenes like they're Dynasty Warriors characters comboing a horde of zombies" This has to be one of the best Adult Swin cartoon pitches i have ever seen, please make this into reality, like a fucking moose obliterating a hoard of zombies
Don't forget that tigers are vengeful. There was a Russian hunter who stole a tigers kill so the tiger started tracking him. When the hunter woke up, when he stepped outside of his cabin there were tiger prints everywhere. Eventually the hunter and tiger came face to face and the hunter shot the tiger. So naturally the tiger continued tracking him and eventually game ended him
Sharks are for tourists and bedtime stories. Tigers are the deadliest large predator, period. There are about 2500 Shark attacks recorded in the last 500 years, and the most kills one ever racked up that we know of was 6. Tigers have killed about 373,000 since 1800, and ONE killed 438 people in a couple of years. I think Casual ought to do a show on them..... if he hasn't already.
@Hyper Speed actually it would, the nail biting suspense as a silent and powerful hunter stalks him throughout the movie, the desperation when asking everyone for help, bro, the emotions and suspense would make it a lit movie, if done right.
I don’t remember this but my family used to tell me this story all the time: When I was about 2, my parents/grandparents took me to a zoo, and there were some Hyenas in a cage with a railing a few feet away. Apparently I was enamored with them and didn’t want to leave. I was told that they were cackling back at me for about 10 minutes before the keeper ushered us away for their “feeding time”. My Grandparents would always say that I had a connection with them. It wasn’t until I got older, and learned that Hyenas cackle when they see something they want to hunt/eat, that I realized: they didn’t like me, they though I was a juicy snack. When I told my family about this new info, they looked a little shocked. I just think it’s funny
You lucky, if your parents pulled a certain mom move from 2016 Cincinnati zoo you would probably be in heaven while the hyenas got to devour your body and life.
I once saw a documentary about a group of tourists and their tour guides getting attacked by a hippo. The guides were not off-course, the tourists were just there to kayak, and one lone hippo just happened to wander off and run into them. Two experienced guides died and a third barely escaped with his life; if they hadn't put themselves between their passengers and the hippo, there probably would've been more casualties. Almost thirty people in four or five kayaks just paddling down a river, and a hippo that got lost just decided someone had to die.
Yep, no amount of experience will save you when head to head in the territory of an apex animal wanting you dead. There’s a documentary of that happening with a crocodile guide who also had many years of experience. Grizzly man is another example
You’re right. I grew up in moose and grizzly bear country. Moose aren’t afraid of anything including people, grizzlies OR wolverines. And I’ve seen grizzlies back down from wolverines. With their cubs nearby. Moose also have the “miserable old man syndrome” even when they’re young or cows.
Here in Canada too. I was taking a good friend on a canoe trip, and he saw his first moose - a cow feeding on water lily roots in a shallow river mouth. A moment later, a male with small antlers emerged from the woods at the water's edge and tried to a approach her. I don't know if the male was a suitor who didn't know it wasn't time (this was the beginning of autumn, but well before the start of the rut) or maybe a teenager who was overstaying his welcome with mom, and she didn't want him raiding the fridge. Long story short: Ms. Moosey had that same "miserable old man syndrome," and she wasn't havin' it. She saw him off with a flurry of kicks and bellows - so my friend's first meese became his first moose-fight. I've seen them do the same to black bears, small vehicles and, in one memorable case, to about thirty tourists who were asking for it.
@@mudshovel289 also my son ran into a moose on his way to work recently and it totalled his Toyota Tundra with a 2” lift kit on it. The moose was about a year old and it just about came across the hood and took out the cab. He was lucky. That 2” lift probably saved his life.
I live in an area with mountain lions, and the only attack in my lifetime was when a malnourished, underweight female attacked a 6yo (the kid’s injuries were relatively minor). They have to be literally starving to risk attacking people, and even then, it went for someone who weighed less than a Costco sized bag of dog food
I’ve actually been “attacked” by one. I got lucky and heard it coming and turned around and he B-lined it right. I was real upset with my dog for not noticing first lol
I remember when my Chihuahua ran across the street to challenge a grizzly sized Deutscher Schaferhund and ran away screaming lol I should've brought popcorn.
it's pretty rare, yup. most predators stay away from people unless they're desperate or learned to associate humans with food. which is very comforting, until someone decides it's a good idea to feed the gators 💀
Years ago a mountain lion wandered down the mountain into my hometown and mauled three people and a dog, after it was stopped they discovered it had lost its teeth due to age and disease, it was starving and couldn't properly eat what it killed.
Well I mean if you're right with Jesus... watching some of these videos make me want to confess though and get that feeling of being right with Dad. It's easier to think of death when there's nothing on your consciousness.
7:14 Fun fact: That doesn't actually work. The whole trick of wearing a backwards mask was created in the early 1900s in an attempt to keep people safe from a man-eating tiger known as the Tiger of Champawat, who with a 436-person killstreak holds the Guinness World Record as the most prolific man-eating tiger in history. During her reign of terror, she would evade the Indian and Nepalese military patrols that were sent to hunt her, travel as far as 32 kilometres in one day in order to find people to eat, kill women and children in broad daylight, and actually scared the local population so much that people were afraid to go to work. She was finally shot in 1907 by legendary British hunter Jim Corbett, who found that the reason she put humans on the menu was because she had several broken teeth that prevented her from hunting her usual prey.
"In Sundarbans in West Bengal, where man-animal conflict is at its peak, fishermen and bushmen originally created masks made to look like faces to wear on the back of their heads because tigers always attack from behind. Wildlife experts say this worked for a short time but tigers soon realized it was a hoax and the attacks continued" - Times Of lndia article
As someone who grew up in the mountains, we had a joke about how to tell the difference between a black bear and a grizzly bear. "Kick it as hard as you can and shimmy up a tree. If it's a black bear, it'll climb up the tree to maul you. If it's a grizzly bear it will knock the tree over and then eat you."
Haha, we were taught "the idea grizzlies cannot climb is a myth. If the tree is big enough to support their weight they can climb it. And if it isn't, they'll just knock it down."
It's depressing to know that a lot of your options here are to just die, but it's also reassuring to know that these are some of the world's top animals meaning that they are some of the strongest on their species. Still Hella scary though, thanks 4 the vid dude.
Saw a brown bear once while on a hike to the summer cottage, when it looked at me I just made myself look bigger and walked back slowly. The bear went to stand on his back legs and just looked at me. After he was out of my vision I fkn bolted it.
One time I watched a whole family of black bears eating out of my garbage. At first I wanted to go out and chase them off, but then I decided to be nice and just leave them. The weird part is that somehow they opened the shed's sliding door to get to the garbage.
My dad knew a guy who was attacked by a grizzly on Vancouver Island. He curled into a ball and it not only tore his backpack off but ripped the skin of his back off too exposing some of his organs. When he turned his head to see where it was it ripped half of his face off leaving the skin hanging and removing an eyeball. It eventually lost interest and the man hiked like this for over a mile to a logging road where he was picked up by another man several hours later. This was in the 70’s and the man actually lived. He was just surveying for a new logging road but the grizzly wasn’t even having that. 🇨🇦😬
I'd 100% watch his video on the Darwin Awards featuring animals, the humor and creative wordplay would make those stories go from gold to Khazad-dûm mithril!
I remember when Iceland had our "year-of-polar-bears" where a record number (3-4) polar bears ended up floating on sea ice from Greenland. There was an interview with a young girl who lived on a farm. She saw something white by one of their fences and assumed some white plastic had come loose off of their hay rolls and gotten stuck on the fence so she went to go get it. When she was about 10-20m away she looked up and realised that she was actually looking at a huge polar bear eating some unlucky ducks. Hearing her explain that she had never ran as fast in her entire life gave me chills. She was damn lucky it had found something to snack on and was too tired and hungry to go after anything bigger than nesting ducks.....
10-20m is roughly 32.8 - 65.6ft for my freedom unit friends That's insanely close considering it could've blitzed her down in roughly 6-10 seconds if it wanted to at that range.
Fun fact: A man survived a Tiger attack by punching it as hard as he could in the nose, so if all else fails, swing for the nose or eyes, good luck not getting your hand bit.
How to survive a grizzly near attack: play dead. It's good practice for when you actually die a couple minutes later. How to survive other stuff: you probably won't.
@Hyper Speed I was always told that playing dead makes it look like you died from a disease and thus aren't worth the risk of infection to eat. do I believe this? ehhh.....
@@wrongtime9097 when you play dead you need to play show like show that you started suddedly to die in agonising pain. or eat somthing and start making weird noises and die
@Hyper Speed Most grizzly attacks are not predatory, but territorial. so if you cease to be a threat they tend to leave you alone. However even a casual slap can still injure you greatly, so lying on the ground and playing dead is the most harmless you can be to it. Playing dead is also a confusion thing, for a wild animal, it either kills something, or finds something that is already dead. Running up to something and it just flopping on the ground without any physical interaction is not in their experience. And that makes them wary, and confused and cautious. Cautious enough to not see you as food, you may suffer a lethal disease or massive parasite infection, it is not normal for things to just drop dead so they are not sure what to do with that. Now if a Grizzly had already decided you were going to be it's next meal and you don't have bearspray or serious firepower on you. Playing dead may just buy you that confusion thing and survive. Or you were dead no matter what.
I like to think that for most of these animals, similar conversations happen but in reverse. “How can I survive human attacks?” “Act cute enough and they won’t want to attack. Other than that, you better hope it’s true that all animals go to heaven.”
"Sometimes they're sneaky but usually they're loud. You can almost always just run from them, they're slow as hell. Whatever you do though, don't threaten them. And don't retaliate, especially in a developed country. Humans are incredibly vengeful and will hunt you personally if you take one out, even if they had it coming."
@@bartudundar3193 true, we’re so dominant that we drove megafauna on every continent we expanded into to extinction(Africa was the exception because we evolved there so those animals evolved to survive among humans)
@@magiv4205 It’s actually kind of a handicap. The reason we left the trees is because Africa was becoming a dessert and there weren’t enough trees to live in. We got hunted easily by land predators until we learned to make spears and evolved better bodies for running
I don't think, you would ever be bare handed. even if you got there by mistake, you can easily find a stick, humans are not really that defenseless, like tf, we are apex predators, its true, we have become really soft, cuz we don't exercise as much as our grandparents, but the country where I live in, if you go to the villages, and even at the outskirts of cities, animal attacks like tiger, monkeys are very common, people know how to deal with them.
@@godfather7339 the problem with that is 1v1 against any of these animal with a stick is a good way to spell desperate. We hunted animals back in the days by throwing spears and numbers all the while keeping our distance and even then some of us still died, not 1v1 stick fight with a bear, tiger or an elephant with no experience. Also Tigers are ambush predators, they dont throw themselves in our face and maul us for a breakfast so idk how you know how to "deal with them". Monkeys are easier to deal with than bears, hippos and a lot of others.
One of my sister’s friends was on a field trip to a nature reserve in South Africa when he was a kid. They were walking through this one area with a guide, but he got distracted by a rock or or something, and when he looked up everyone was far ahead of him. He tried to run to get back to them, but then he heard this noise in the bushes. It was a hyena, and then he realized that there were several of them standing near him making those laughing sounds. The guide had noticed he had fallen behind, so he had left the kids with the teacher and started to walk back when he saw the hyenas. There was nothing he could do, so they all just stood there for about 20 minutes…waiting. He said it was one of the scariest things he ever experienced, in part because no one could help him if the hyenas decided to go for him, and because the guide would only endanger them all by trying to scare the hyenas away or move past them. Eventually they lost interest and walked away, but man…he was so lucky!
@@BarManeNw3 Yeah, shoot one round and get a pack of 50 hyenas on your ass. Standing still and not causing their killer instincts to turn on from running away is the best choice.
lmao my grandfather’s a pilot and he always advises that if you’re landing anywhere in the Arctic to always have a loaded shotgun on hand when leaving a vehicle bc polar bears are more than happy to make you their next meal
I can admit a Moose encounter was the most terrifying moment of my entire life! Was walking around my uncle's property at night when I saw a moose just giving me the " i will disembowel you if you come any closer" look. That was the longest 500 feet back to his house of my life! I still can't believe my pants remained unsoiled!
@@seewobble7048 no he was literally 4-6feet away when I saw him. I knew not to run so I just backed up slowly and headed back to the house which was about 500 feet away. I the Moose was that far away I wouldn’t have even cared because I wouldn’t have seen or heard him
@@Harry64278 no he was 4- 6 feet away. The house I retreated to was 500 feet and he followed and stared me down the entire time I retreated. Like I said I can’t believe my pants weren’t full of piss and shit!😂😂
The relentless delivery, the graphic presentations of how many things will kill you, the impeccable vocals. If I ever get killed by anything with weirder teeth than me, I want this man to come and laugh at my funeral.
Speaking from experince with elephants, in 2009, I was attacked by a little 6 year old elephant in Thailand named Chompoo, because he got annoyed at me for taking a pineapple away from him(it wasn't his pineapple). Anyway, a few minutes into the worst beating I'd ever received(I as an amateur boxer at the time), I pissed myself. Turns out, an animal beating you to death with it's nose, is quite appalled by rubbing it's nose in unine soaked clothes. Long enough for people to grab you and drag you to safety anyway. So... yeah, to survive elephants, smell like a toilet.
Why would you take something away from a large, wild animal??? "It wasn't his pineapple" is the most obnoxious, Karen statement I ever heard. It's a damn fruit! Let the animal have it. I can't believe you thought you would school an elephant 🤦🏽♀️
If you wanna survive a chimp attack just have a weapon. Also don’t be unfair to the chimps. If you give one chimp something then make sure that you have enough for the class
@@tundra9013 for some yeah if you fight a chimp and there’s no water just fight it, tons of people survived chimp attacks by beating the chimps ass. A man killed a mountain lion once so my advice would be to fight back. And hippos necks suck they struggle turning so if a hippo is chasing you get ready to juke it like a nfl player. Good luck.