its like being "friends" while you do all the manual work around her house/give rides on car/pay for going out and maybe even gifts (jfc) she likes having you as a friend... as long as you are useful and benefit her in some way
"Loves me a little?" Love should be absolute. There should be no modifiers. He should leave, without words. Develop a plan and execute the plan. Lmao talk to her? Misunderstood? How the f*ck can you misunderstand "... willing to run away with my trailer trash Ex when he called...?" C'mon. GTFOH.
1 story: "I believed her. We both cried at this stage and we just hugged and sat togetger". We sat down together - she took her cake and eat it, and I ate the bull$hit that she dumped on my head. Happy end.
Nah you don't say settled if you don't mean downgrading. You don't even consider leaving a 4 year relationship at all if you don't mean downgrading. You allowed her to spins some lies.
Well no, the term is usually indicating satisfaction with a current situation in some regard, and no longer searching for a better set of circumstances. Humans also tend to get emotional and make rash decisions in this state. The idea that a person should never "even consider" doing something at all is simply and utterly bizarre... The only major red flag in this story is her talking about "recently" not regretting a choice she made half a decade ago.
He said he cried with her after the talk. She doesn't respect him and he allows her to spin the truth. One day she will leave him and admit she settled and break his heart. Never cry in front of your wife. It kills their attraction for you.
@@Jafar545uh… no. You don’t settle for something you’re satisfied with, you settle for something that you don’t want but is the best available. You settle for some Chicken when you really want steak, you don’t settle for chicken what that’s what you wanted in the first place
You can clearly identify someone by the way they approach a potential confrontation. 1st OP dodged it for days and gave her enough space to yap. 2nd OP slept on it and nuked her the next morning.
4:17 Umm This happened 5 years ago, she clearly told her friends that she regretted it until ‘recently’, now she is telling OP that ‘recently’ meant only 1 month after the offer was made..? So by her ‘recently’ was approx 5 years ago.. That’s super sus imo!
Yeah she is lying and got caught. However actions speak louder than words. She didn't go with this dude, but stayed with him. She has by all accounts been a loyal and good wife. Again actions speak louder than words. As for the ex-boyfriend, I would tell her that if she chooses to go to the funeral or do anything with this guys death that we are done. This would include any survivors guilt crap.
S1: With the ex-bf dead, her options are closed. So she has to say those words. OP is a fool, his “wife” is still looking for better options and it is clear he is not considered high enough.
Yes, this. OP let her off the hook way too easily. He bought her bs story hook, line and sinker, without question. Seems like she fed him exactly the lies he wanted to hear, and because he's too afraid of what the truth would mean (potential divorce) he simply accepted it as truth so that he could go back to life the way it was before all this happened, even though deep down he knows that they're living a lie.
@@SteveMichael Yeah, but what if she doesn’t love him and 'settled' for stability (as she herself stated)? She didn’t leave after realizing her ex is an addict and lives in a trailer, while OP is a good provider. She could be lying about other things too, like cheating. Also packing your bags after just 1 hr call.. leaving behind a 4 year relationship? But it’s just SPECULATIONS(maybe I’m overthinking, but that lie made me suspicious!). You could be right too!
Especially when the wife is still only in her mid-twenties. Nobody is going to waste their youth if they think they can do better than what they currently have.
Regarding the first story, ask yourselves this, would She have stayed with her husband if her ex came in one day, with a stable job, a home, and asked her to come back to him? Heck, with even a twinge of stability.
"Briefly on brake"... I bet you she's the one who demanded it too! That'd be when the dude should have left. For good. And found someone who doesn't act like she's still in high school.
lol “on a break”. You don’t take breaks from people you love, family, partners, or otherwise. You’re mainly there for the hard times specifically. How some people behave is mind boggling.
@@NanoNaps Asking questions is counter-productive when 1. You already know the answer and 2. It will only aggravate the situation. Just leave. Leave her to her ex. And to the streets. Where she belongs.
"apologized for listening in" AYFKM??? You have every right to listen in on a conversation in a common room. "I'm glad it was a misunderstanding" Again AYFKM? She settled for him. She saw him as the stable ATM. She's going to cheat on his butt in a year or two. He should have sent her packing
You were her last resort! Gather all the evidence so she cannot deny what she said behind your back. Present the evidence to everyone and then leave. Knowing this move forward! How can you live with her knowing the truth.? 😊
First story, OP is in a world of hurt when his wife finds another guy that gives her the butterflies. Well, every guy has to get red pilled at some point in their life I guess.
'Stability' and 'better person' translates to settling and are not the compliments women think they are. Women need to get out of their feelings and listen to men the way they demand men listen to them
Story 1: I thought she did it on impulse and quickly stopped herself. Nope, she had an hour long flirt with her ex which is already cheating then she packed her things and even regretted not leaving her BF for her EX for months. She honestly made everything WORSE when she talked but simps gonna simp
I get your point, but dude, it happened 5 years ago. And in the end she did not leave him, but i guess maybe she cheated more then just by flirting that that moment?
@@mike_o7874 you dont know that. You dont know how many times it happened, when it happened and if it stopped happening at all. All you know is that she flirted with her ex, considered abandoning an estable relationship for said ex and kept it hidden from bf. If she had come out to the bf "this happened today and I am telling you because I can warranty it wont happen again" yes I would trust her. The bf found out by chance, thats all.
Gotta give props to the wife in story 1 she knows how to think on her feet . Dude was never gonna leave her . Thats why he never told anyone so he can stay in he delusion life
Story 1: sit and be a slipper like you are... "recently" or until he died... After that, you are great for her... Sometimes it really hurts to see how many people can live in delusion
I love how these stories open with we have a great marriage. Delusional people. When they show you or tell who they are listen to them.Time for this guy to handle himself and his problem. WHY is she talking to her EX! They are a EX for a reason. Story 2 You didn't confront on the spot? STOP SIMPING! You now know where she stands and now she can get out.
She played MC Like a violin, ( he's stupid, blinded by love, she settled for stability as the ex was living in a trailer, the moment she finds a better option she'll leave for the next and make you her ex
Why are women so nonchalant about incredibly intimate details about each other's romantic lives? Also, story 2: oh sweet baby child, you think a prenup will be enough legal defense at divorce court in California? Lawyer up immediately.
If op believes it, ya can't do anything. I understand the dilemma of hoping it could be a misunderstanding VS having heard what was said. It remains that she decided to talk to her ex after a big fight she had with her husband, something she probably never would've forgiven him for. Call it semantics but "I used to regret it, but not recently" doesn't feel like "I only regretted it for a month, then decided he was better and never thought about it again". "used" mean, well, something "usual" so, for a "long" time, and "recently" well, if she says in the same sentence her having a bag ready was a" long time ago", and she "recently" stopped regretting it, "recently" cannot, be even in the same year as "that time" All that to say, if I were in those shoes, I would find it incredibly hard to trust anything from now on.
Comments sections on these RU-vid videos are great. It’s as if you all just live off the drama and don’t want what’s best for people or their decision. The first guy isn’t a “mega simp”, he’s a pretty normal guy and had a brief issue with his wife
The dramatic outro of "I'm leaving" is the greatest thing a woman can say and do in a break up. You get to "misinterpret" the meaning and and use the implication to CHANGE THE LOCKS. Take pictures/video of you packing her crap; store it safely some where and move on.
Story 1: why does it matter? Your marriage is happy and you love each other and get along well. Everyone needs to "settle" at some point. The comments are full of incel "alpha" wannabes who don't understand the fine nuances of human relationships. Given that her ex was a junkie, maybe her decision was based on impulse rather than reason, and when reason took over, she realized that she was better off staying with her husband.
Story 1. She had her bags ready to go to her ex. She was playing hard to keep for the x. She would have left if the x picked her up. OP is a simp. Next time they have another fight she would take her bag and leave him when she finds another lover. Story 2. OP is a real man. His wife does not deserves him.
Second story: once the water works proved ineffective that mask came off real quick didn’t it? He’s got spine for standing his ground and moving in from a “partner” that never cared for him.
90% of all marriages I know around me is a 'settled down' marriage, and one thing i realised is a marriage like that, crosses the stage of love and directly becomes family.
S1, the dude cries in front of her. You’re gd right she settled for the resources you provide and her explanations when you confronted her were what she thought would satisfy you. Guess what she doing on those girls night out she you mention she has often…
That means that his earnings are greater than her ex, nothing more. I guess that she needs to use that condescending tone to avoid accountability for her actions and decisions. After all, we all know that we, the men, are the ones to blame for everything. If she has to "SETTLE" for him, it's his damned fault.
That first dude lmao, gentlemen if you cry infront of your women(wife or gf), women lose their respect for you and immediately consider you a beta. When they say they like an emotional man, it means she likes a man who can listen to her emotions and react accordingly, or maybe be like that one boxer who is in the final fight and is in his emotional state before overcoming them to win the match against his eternal rival. What women say and what women want is completely different. No woman likes a man who cries.
In both cases, the wife never loved the husband, but that isn't the problem. Most married women do not love their husbands, and it is not reasonable for most men to expect their wives to love them. The real problem is that both women disrespected their husbands, and that is intolerable. A man has every right to expect his wife to treat him with respect. In the first case, OP allowed his wife to make up a story to mollify his hurt feelings, and maybe that will turn out okay. As long as she treats him with respect and loyalty from now on, their marriage might work out. In the second case, though, OP was definitely right to end things. That level of disrespect is just unforgivable.
st1 basic simp. they always need some space to process then just have long, deep conversations 😀😀 disgusting. st2 he is young and fool but obviously getting progress.
I dont get it, have you ever been in a relationship? I mean its easy to SAY YES DUMP THAT BIETCH you been with for 9 years she is A BITCH. You do realize they been together for 9 years? and that incident happened 5 years ago? like dude chill. I mean at least from that you cant know that she has cheated, if she actually did, then okay i get the point.
lol first story was like bro... married for 9 years or something and great intimate relationship? Plus the Ex was even dead at that point, he overreacted. Reddit telling him to divorce her was really uncalled for, just a talk would be good.
@@chaitanyagupta6668 you're free to think that, but eavesdropping on someone without even giving them a chance to explain themselves I find even more cowardly. She had the choice between the adventure of her ex or "settling" with OP, and she chose to settle because it was safer. That's a perfectly reasonable criteria, choosing safety over adventure in a drugged out trailer park.
@@filosahoge947dude, 4 years she felt like she was settling and was ready to leave him over 1 phone call. For a guy who was near homeless and on drugs. That says a lot about her character. She clearly likes the guy for stability and nothing more.
Not blaming the dude but a way to prevent this from happening to you is to not be the sort of dude who cries with his wife. Masculinity is stable. Control yourself for the benefit of people around you.
Story 1: I'm on team "wife didn't mean it like that." What she MEANT was that a life of adventure with dangerous ex made her excitement endorphins go brrrrrrr, and then the smart part of her brain shut that whole line of thought down. "Settled" in that case doesn't mean "could have done better," it means she chose to eat the balanced meal instead of the entire birthday cake. It's be nice if she didn't even consider the ex's offer, but, if she were the kind of person who could do that, then she wouldn't have had an exciting druggie ex at all.
There's a big difference in the word that follows "settled". If you settle WITH, that's not an insult. If you settle FOR, that's an insult. It's like the standard cheater line of "it's not what it looks like!" in that it can't be anything else, they're just trying to convince you otherwise.
There is one big problem in your interpretation, she regretted her decision until recently. And I don't buy her lie of recently being one month after the decision 5 years ago. No one would say recently to define this situation, what she means is literally recently, days, weeks or at best a few months ago. And I bet that the recently was the death of her druggy ex, only them she had a final epiphany that if she had stayed with him she would be dead by overdose just like him. This was not a momentary lapse of judgment driven by hormones, this was a lifelong calculated decision that she regretted until reality showed her beyond reasonable doubt that if she had choose the other path her life would have ended. And until that point she was a actress play a character and living a lie.
Nah, I still think she gets a pass. She made the right call. And everybody embellishes a little when they're talking to a friend, it adds to the drama. Story 2 though, holy shit bro dodged a narcissitic bullet for sure.
I sense a generational gap here. Most men back then can suffice knowing their wife is with them just for their money. Men today can't. They have expectations and one of them is respect and another thing called love. What you said will be happily interpreted like that by a man from 80s. But men of today will immediately take offense as they should. Being with a woman who has absoluteyl no respect for you and is in there only and only for your money. Naaah.
Its not your fault women these days think that finding a partner that is their EQUAL settling. They have slept with men way out of their league who would never commit that they start to think those men are their level. Its truly a joke what liberation has done to the minds of young women.
