"I Used to Rob Houses” - Ethan Simmons-Patterson - Stand-Up Featuring

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Ethan Simmons-Patterson delves into his crime-committing past, ponders what is happening in the woods and explains how millennials were traumatized by the internet.
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Опубликовано:

15 июн 2024

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Комментарии : 499

@ronnieDshman18 4 месяца назад

“Wow that was a nice open concept kitchen” fucking killed me

@akademikz23 3 месяца назад

This dude is very quick with it, idk if he's practiced this set thousands of times 😂 but he's on point

@therealist33777 3 месяца назад

“Some people pay for food, I cut out the middleman” - is simply brilliant

@chriscave1531 4 месяца назад

"I think I'mma stay" and "stop robbing me "😂😂😂

@chocol8dread1 3 месяца назад

That part 🤣🤣

@SKIDSnSTUFF 4 месяца назад

thats good jokes. dude did a half hour set in 12 minutes

@guaposneeze 4 месяца назад

Yeah, you learn to get in and out quick when you rob houses.

@myriamcisse4814 3 месяца назад

That’s a very good one😂

@user-mg8jg3tx6i 3 месяца назад

@@guaposneeze NICE! LOL

@Krysis219 3 месяца назад

I came here to say this. His jokes are good but the delivery is off.

@ragemodegaming7962 3 месяца назад

And only said 'hell yeah' 548 damn times. Go back to silently robbing houses ffs.

@Acidbath- 4 месяца назад

This dude killed it. I was laughing the whole time.

@mdw.444 4 месяца назад

Facts hahahaha

@MrCreed145 4 месяца назад

www.youtube.com/@ethansimmons-patterson754

@HippoLand808 4 месяца назад

For sure. Had me rolling

@MatthewJohnson-gv3fm 4 месяца назад

Young legend😂😂😂😂😂

@MatthewJohnson-gv3fm 4 месяца назад

Beautiful day for the n word😂😂😂😂

@tusharkakshapati7610 4 месяца назад

This guys material is perfect for skits or a tv show. He’s on fire !

@kubolor1234 Месяц назад

Yeah I can see him in a writers room.

@NateSmith87 4 месяца назад

"Hotpockets at Trevor locked in the basement," 😂😂😂😂

@AsahiYuban 4 месяца назад

They found all the bones?? 😂😂

@vandero.8742 3 месяца назад

Oh word?😂

@nathanhart3240 2 месяца назад

"well I guess I'll go be a barista" 😂

@ikkou111 4 месяца назад

Wow that is an insane set just rapid fire laughs

@chrisclouds4182 4 месяца назад

My new favorite comic! Never seen him before but I was crying the whole time. Almost too quick for the audience to even keep up! This guy has IT.

@falseidol1321 3 месяца назад

Same 😂😂

@RustyGraffitiReviews 3 месяца назад

I had to stop robbing houses when I seen one of my friends families photos on the fireplace. Well I stopped AFTER that house. 😂

@versatileduplicity9313 3 месяца назад

Damn 😂

@clyde._ 3 месяца назад

Was you invited or…

@RustyGraffitiReviews 3 месяца назад

@@clyde._ nah I never been there before it just happened to be a spot I picked

@Morelife876 3 месяца назад

😂😂😂😂 wild , should have left him a note saying “found you” 💀💀💀

@RustyGraffitiReviews 3 месяца назад

@@Morelife876 😂

@JimmyHopkins42 4 месяца назад

Bro got Mark Normand pace. Doesn't skip a beat, back-to-back on every punch, & don't stop till the set time is up. Insanity honestly.

@brittanysherrod5015 3 месяца назад

Similar pacing, but his cadence is so much more playful!

@HalIucinations 3 месяца назад

The delivery on "but you ended up stealing our hearts" 😂

@leonelcadet3833 3 месяца назад

YO this dude was knocking the jokes out. That is a really hard speed. He did that.

@kayleighgroenendal8473 4 месяца назад

I could listen to him yap all day 😂

@chaseknight6450 4 месяца назад

I hope he gets more sets out there. His material is on point.

@TYLOTYLOTYLO 2 месяца назад

His pacing was perfect. Just kept going i cudnt breathe 😂😂😂

@genjisann2051 4 месяца назад

the Pattersons are killing it in comedy

@MitchellBahamas 3 месяца назад

He's not related to Kam. But o also immediately thought this lol

@genjisann2051 3 месяца назад

@jmajic1 what a coinkydink huh?

@Brandonparanormal562 3 месяца назад

He says yea just like him lol

@alexcoroian3983 2 месяца назад

"ya'll found all the bones?" that killed me bruh

@miqjoseph 3 месяца назад

Some ppl pay for food , I cut out the middle man 😂😂😂

@jaylol7226 4 месяца назад

Hope he keeps going, looked up all his other material. Relatable as hell, funny as heaven

@Forever.29 4 месяца назад

“Relatable as hell, funny as heaven” 👍 I like that 😁

@topdollarrific 4 месяца назад

I’ve been laughing long after my first watch. I came back to watch again, leave a thumbs up, and comment. Great set! 🤣🤣🤣

@rebeccarodriguezkeogh4388 4 месяца назад

Ditto! Or, ... SAME!

@Lavishfeathers 4 месяца назад

Yooooo the internet 😂😂😂😂

@aimeechoup6767 3 месяца назад

"They gotta be dead" for the 2girls1cup girls is too funny!! This guy's hilarious

@johnespiridion1926 4 месяца назад

super talented I'd love to see more.

@BrooklynRedneck 4 месяца назад

lmfaooo as someone who robbed houses with a bunch of friends growing up, i had the same experience 😂😂😂

@lacezobi 3 месяца назад

"all the bones?" made me LOSE IT

@pelletfunner6701 4 месяца назад

A real pleasure to watch! I hope he goes far looking forward to seeing him again!

@Trenchcoatjonny 4 месяца назад

Nah the bones jokes really got me dawg. Amazing set man, love the energy

@brittanysherrod5015 3 месяца назад

So good to see this funny dude still at it!!!!

@MrBlaine1234 3 месяца назад

This is like if Kevin Holland was in stand up instead of the UFC 😂

@JDWitherspoon 4 месяца назад

Ethan is an Amazing comedian

@Shel2013 3 месяца назад

Throwing Hot Pockets at Trevor 💀🤣🤣🤣

@d_range211 4 месяца назад

On point with the internet differences 😂

@jay3898 4 месяца назад

Great set

@richatkinson4291 4 месяца назад

Fire set. Refreshing to hear rapid fire talent. Keep at it bro

@IamProlific 2 месяца назад

This whole thing is creative 😭😭😭

@alicetaylor6452 4 месяца назад

Brilliant I will look out for more from this dude

@jmane4581 2 месяца назад

I Turned Around He Had A Labrador Retriever In His Hands 🤣🤣 💀

@JB-bm1to 3 месяца назад

I'm cracking up! I normally don't get excited for new (to me) comedians but he's hilarious.

@ekdaufin1485 4 месяца назад

$1 for food 😂

@Fibonachi. 3 месяца назад

Stop robbing my fucking house 😂😂😂

@nanakowmensah2715 2 месяца назад

The archaeologist part is killing me 😂

@AdventureRich 4 месяца назад

Rapid fire, this was gooooood! 🙌🏼

@BHPaperstacks 3 месяца назад

Can't wait to see this dude blow up. I was laughing the whole set.

@stephenemery2885 Месяц назад

Walking against wind 😂

@rebeccarodriguezkeogh4388 4 месяца назад

LOVE this material! Nobody else home but me, & my cackling may have frightened the neighbors! Not to mention, anyone approaching with a mind to rob my home

@falseidol1321 3 месяца назад

That Man’s A Beast ! Punchline after punchline !!

@GodOfLovers1111 4 месяца назад

This guys hilarious. I usually get tired of racial humor, but this dude hits it perfect. 👌

@alxx6594 3 месяца назад

This man’s a comedic genius!

@Racine85 3 месяца назад

Now you’re stealing our hearts 🤣🤣

@randomproductions908 3 месяца назад

Love this guy, gotta add him to my favorite comedians

@MrBaskins2010 4 месяца назад

bears playing spades is wild

@wrtye2069 3 месяца назад

Hey man keep the racism out, a black man is as good as a child squirrels, is as good as a white Christmas

@OLTRATV 3 месяца назад

Great Job! Def need more!

@alirott2271 4 месяца назад

THIS BROTHER IS FREAKING FUNNY. How is the crowd not just rolling around laughing?? Watching this at five in the morning drinking coffee getting ready to go to work and I am fucking laughing my ass off.Watching this at five in the morning drinking coffee getting ready to go to work and I am fucking laughing my ass off Greatly needed. greatly appreciated.

@StanleyPitts 3 месяца назад

Great material dudes funny af

@bigpancho22 6 дней назад

" I think I'm stay " while robbing a house is crazy 😂

@Djamourii 3 месяца назад

This is by far one of the best sets from this generation of comics. This guy is going to be big!

@LieutenantDan 3 месяца назад

“Some people pay for food, I cut out the middleman” spit out my water lmao

@mattresbert 4 месяца назад

Brilliant stuff Right off the bat ❤

@mattlb6825 3 месяца назад

Straight up funny he killed this had me and my girl crying about the bears

@FallofftheMap 4 месяца назад

This dude killed it. Racial jokes without being an asshole. Racial truths in a way that is funny rather than just sad and shitty.

@AllanOdu 3 месяца назад

Incredible pacing of jokes. Absolutely killer set

@JacyndaMinor 4 месяца назад

LOVED HIM!

@autumnstoptwo 3 месяца назад

brilliant set 😂😂 rolling from start to finish

@sylusandre 3 месяца назад

loved it. that bear joke was good.!!!

@nowitsmidnite3815 3 месяца назад

Y'all found ALL the bones?!? 🤣

@elliesings9508 4 месяца назад

Definitely needs to write for sitcoms

@belovedgapgod7783 3 месяца назад

Im really impressed that he’s still alive given his past career choices 😂

@oliviercornelissen8916 Месяц назад

That was a whirlwind of fun!

@sneakysquirrl708 4 месяца назад

11:04 I’m so glad I voided those people like the plague. Thank the gods I never saw it. Also I loved your set. Brilliant.

@dominusgrey 4 месяца назад

I like how quickly he moves between bits and doesnt wait for the audience

@mynamewhatis7254 4 месяца назад

Wish it was longer!

@elvisjames 3 месяца назад

That's what she said

@themaggattack 3 месяца назад

"Just throwin hot pockets down the stairs at Trevor." 😂 "What are they tryna communicate to eachother?"🤣 "Stop robbing my house." 💀

@empoweredyoga2843 3 месяца назад

This guy is super funny and seems hella cool

@artfromthesoul8675 4 месяца назад

Bars!! I'm a fan.

@nicolasbarceloni3861 4 месяца назад

Everything he said was so funny and well delivered, didn’t have boring filler phase at all

@lilmama_2fly680 3 месяца назад

I wasn't expecting to laugh the entire time, but he killed it! Pleasantly surprised!

@stinsonboyz2 2 месяца назад

The first little bit took a sec to hook me... BUT THEN I WAS HOOKED! 😂👏🏾

@KeishaTheTruth777 3 месяца назад

I LOVED THIS!!!

@RoyRage14 3 месяца назад

Hella funny!! I was literally laughing out loud, thanks!!

@nattyshreddz7933 4 месяца назад

Looking forward to seeing more of this comedian! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

@dadechick69 4 месяца назад

This was gold 😂😂😂😂

@belleyouuu2637 2 месяца назад

This guy has me rolling!!! 😂😂😂

@flikitova1399 2 месяца назад

Great set man!

@jeremiahtruuu3750 2 месяца назад

Great job Ethan nonstop laughs😂😂😂

@BronzDano 4 месяца назад

Genius. Never heard of this guy before, but he’s a master 💪🏽

@suezhobbit9617 4 месяца назад

Duuude so effin funny I’d love more of his content 😂😂

@BLOXKAFELLARECORDS 4 месяца назад

Bro.... I want to apologize for that. I didn't mean to call you tha B word. Thanks 😂 for using this in the stand up. 🙏🏼 💯 My girl does deserve it 😂 bro