I've Gone Through ECT and TMS: Ask Me Anything Part 1 

Have you looked into ketamine infusions?

Did you ever find help? I have Bipolar, also at the end of my rope and considering ECT as well as Ketamine. I also have Narcolepsy and EBV, it's a triple whammy...I will try anything.

@@penelope9649 Hey Penelope. I'm afraid I haven't improved very much. I did ect and ketamine but nothing worked. I had some success with Zyprexa, but it only last a couple of months. Just like all the drugs I try. If I didn't have kids I wouldn't be here anymore. Even my wife is leaving me over it.

Richard, how did the TMS treatment go?

Anthony, I didn't know TMS had an off label side. I had TMS in the fall of 2017 (about 36 sessions) and found it worked well, but, like every other treatment under the sun, the salutatory effects faded out over time. I'm not sure the insurance I have covers repeated treatment courses. Few things are more horrible than talking to my insurance company about "behavioral" health. I wish you all the luck in the world.

I’m glad you’re feeling better. How old were you when you started to feel better? Did you have ECT therapy?

@@apollonius_rising no . Just went a couple of times to Dr's they pointed the way .I learned most on my own . I was so messed up I had a hard time talking to Dr's or anyone . It took a lot of self reflection. For instance. I was in my late 50s and they were doing renovations in a house I was renting . They were making loud banging noises and I got scared , pit of the stomach scared . After reflection I realized it was from my dad .he yelled real loud a lot and thru things ,broke things ever since I was a baby . After my realization I'm no where as scared when I here loud noises. Thank you for asking

@@1485tbag Oh wow. I’m so sorry you were hurt for so long. I know what you mean by being too messed up to talk to doctors. At my sickest (mostly physical, although with bad brain fog) I had no idea how to tell them what was wrong. They always seemed to treat me for irrelevant things, and sometimes made me worse - so it was off putting. Eventually I married a woman who ended up having bipolar, and she got most of the medical care from then on. I didn’t even see doctors when I most needed them, as everything was about her. Made life very hard. What you’re saying about those realizations makes a lot of sense! I hope to god I haven’t scared any of my children like that. Is your daughter ok, I hope?

@@apollonius_rising thank you . Yes my daughter is doing great . She graduated university and is working. Some stuff rubbed off but not much andshe knows the tools to help her get thru hard times . It's sad to hear about what you had to go thru . You also sound like you had a lot of self-reflection. I'm glad u found your way thru the hard parts. Bruce Lee said , there is no help but self- help . I truly believe it's up to us . Dr's can help but we have to put the work in . I wish you strength and enlightenment. Stay strong

I hope you've felt some improvement

How many treatments did you reveive

With depression in general when you get better there is a smal chance of relapse but mostly no. You will stay better

Ask them about Ketamine first. TMS is another option to try before ECT, but I doubt they gave a TMS machine in the average psych hospital.

How are you now? I.am doing TMS now .the 13 th swssion

So you did ETC but also still have to take antidepressants? How can the doctors then know which thing is working or not?

@@lazarmaria9171 hello! Works very well and I feel fantastic

Well, first I stopped taking the medications because they were only making me worse and my depression was stronger, so my therapist told me about ECT as another alternative and I found it interesting, so I accepted it and agreed, of course I was looking for information about it, I learned, search in google and they made me feel calmer. Before, during and after my ECT I don't take medication, I feel very good, I feel different and more positive, I enjoy my life more and I know I have a purpose, there are some moments when my depression comes without warning but now I know how to control it. I know what I have to do because I know there are days with a lot of sun. Take your time to decide what you have to do, ECT does not work for all people, that is why you should discuss it with a professional or your doctor.

ECT is not a complete cure so there is no full recovery. I undergo maintenance ECT every four weeks and still take my medications. Good question.

I'm sorry for what your going through. I'm struggling as well. I had 14 ECT treatments and feel far worse than I did before. I'm not sure if it's related to the ECTs or not. I wish Ketamine was covered by my insurance because I can't afford it. I feel like it's my last hope (just like I did the ECTs). It's unfortunate how difficult it is to get potentially life-saving treatment that you need. I wish you the best. Hopefully something pans out for you.

I tried the Ketamine Infusions and it didn’t help at all but increased my anxiety. Also it was very expensive. My last hope is ECT and I’m terrified. I don’t know which treatment you opted for but I hope you’re feeling better.

@@JustJ-Me sorry . I am late to answer. I love you all . Thank you for your guidance.

@@coupdefoudre5352 I love you all . Thank you for your guidance.

thanks about your words . how this damned life works ! i tell you . dont lose your hope . try every way that you think may answer , you will successes . in my mind ketamine is better . ketamine is not the final answer . ketamine let you refresh yourself . ketamine will eliminate all depression moods from your mind . first injection help you for 20 days . after that you should inject again and in this time you will be better for more days . you should not stop using anti depression medicine after injection . different ills have different feels but i hope this answer for you . all of this information that i told , was my doctor words . nowadays i am refreshing myself by using curse against my situation . dont give a shit to world . just try to do that

*PART 2* *Potential TRIGGER WARNING for those especially sensitive and really going through some stuff* **Also a long, unintended rant** During another hospitalization at a different hospital I became good friends with a guy younger than myself that was receiving ECTs at the time. He was deteriorating and even worse, the staff thought he was just being attention-seeking/med-seeking. I tried to speak up for him because I knew how awful the jaw pain and migraines can be after the ECTs. We maintained contact after we left the hospital. He was still receiving outpatient ECTs even though he didn't want to. His parents felt conflicted because doctors were telling them one thing and he and I were telling them another. He continued to deteriorate while doing it. He ended up taking his life in 2017, about 3 years after we met. I'm not blaming the ECTs, but I know he loathed them and felt dramatically worse after. I just hope for anyone considering it that you'll do your research both for, against, and especially objectively regarding ECT before making that decision. It's difficult to tell anyone NOT to make the decision under duress, because that's the point where you're grasping for any sort of lifeline that "might" help. I honestly felt I had literally no other option- *because I was told that* , and otherwise I couldn't be helped. I only had the info the hospital gave me and a quick video about what happens during ECT. I hadn't really looked into it prior to this and wasn't allowed computer access. I didn't have an objective person there to help me weigh out the possible pros & cons and possible lifelong complications. If I didn't agree to it I'm quite sure I would've been booted out of the hospital, which at that point might as well have been a death sentence. I blame the hospital as well as myself because I was in a desperate state. I relied on the professionals around me to know and do what's best for me. I believe IF I could've been in a stable, controlled, safe environment with more intensive therapy I could've come out on the other side, ready to face the world *WITHOUT* the use of ECT. I needed to reset and regroup in a safe place but I think most of us know the mental health system is whack and in most cases is not made for the patients, but rather as a money-maker for corporations. I'm not a "conspiracy" person- I used to work at a residential treatment center for 'troubled' adolescents for over 8 1/2 years prior to taking a break to work on myself and eventually receiving the ECT treatments. I know the majority of these companies place money over patient care. I've witnessed it first-hand, whether it's insurance, the facility, company, the corporation, whatever- it usually always comes down to $$$ in the end. I think most of us have a better understanding of what we need/ don't need more than a doctor we just met +/- a week ago. Sure, we need guidance, a different atmosphere, and environment and in that way we're seeking help. Our cases are complex, not something you figure out in a 1or 2 hour session. If something can be helped in 2 weeks or less I don't think we'd need a hospitalization or something so extreme to help "fix" it. It's ridiculous to put a time restriction on how long a person needs to be hospitalized. (Sorry, I absolutely didn't mean to turn this into a rant about the mental health care system, but since I'm this far in.....) unless, the person is feeling "too comfortable" just being in the hospital and isn't actively trying to get better, improve, and participate in their treatment. I don't think it's a good idea to take someone off all their meds they were previously on, give them a whole new set of meds, and often kick them out of the hospital in 2 weeks or less when it takes close to 3 weeks or more to see how the new meds are going to affect the person- either positively or negatively. It could literally mean life or death for that person. For example, although I wasn't in the hospital at this time, I was prescribed Zoloft to help me with my obsessive, ruminating thoughts. It actually amplified it and made me feel very suicidal and insane. It's not like you can just easily stop these meds if you're having an adverse effect. How in the world is everything you see and hear multiple times a day so "Pro-Health" and "Taking Care Of Your Body", but for some reason Mental Health is taken less seriously when it affects not only your mind, but every aspect of your life including your body?! *PART 3 in next Comment*

*PART 3* *Potential TRIGGER WARNING for those especially sensitive and really going through some stuff* **Also a long, unintended rant** I'm beyond frustrated. How I've survived/ EXISTED this freaking long- I don't know, other than the fact that at the end of it all I want to be able to say I did my damndest to stay alive even when I didn't want to, simply so no one can say "If she had only gotten 'help'...." I've been active, proactive, whatever in my attempts to get better (which as most of us know it's nearly impossible to do when you feel apathetic and unmotivated). I'm quite sure I'll die by suicide before anything else, but I can know in the end that I fought against it for at least 30 years. To me death is peace. I feel I'm only fighting for other people and that's not a way to live. Other than my current therapist, who I've had for nearly 10 years, I feel I'm fighting this battle on my own. It's a vicious cycle of going into debt trying to get better so you can simply live, feeling worse and even more hopeless and helpless because you're in debt and continue to get even farther set back in your life, attempting to pay for insurance/ medications/ hospitalizations/ therapy/ primary care doctors/ psychiatrists/ dental/ in my case physical therapy/ other forms of therapy/ ECT or other costly treatments, along with ALL the other bills, responsibilities and things we require simply to survive- AND a good majority of us are having to do so on Disability Income which is hardly enough to cover the basics. So WTF?! Even if I had interests or wanted to do anything "extra" in my life it's impossible because I'm stuck in this money trap. This world was not set up to help people that happened to be unfortunate enough to struggle with mental illness. I don't have a partner to help me with costs because I've chosen to not drag anyone into this mess until/unless I get myself sorted out. Family support emotionally or financially is next to nothing. I made the choice not to have kids because 1- I can't even care for my own self- let alone someone else, 2- Surely they'll inherit depression either by genes/environment or both- I can explain my theory on this further if anyone is interested and I'm not knocking anyone who is in a relationship or has kids- I love kids, but this is a choice I made for myself (and them) for what I feel are good reasons and I don't want anyone else to suffer like I do. Also, I honestly wanted to leave the "suicide option" open without it affecting my potential children, family members, or whoever would be left to care for them. I guess I've always wanted to ensure an easier "out". In that way I'm both selfish and selfless. Depression is a selfish illness in itself. I forget where I was even going with this, other than the fact that I feel the system/world sets the mentally ill up to fail rather than help them/us. It's hard to break the cycle. This is not about gaining sympathy or pity, but rather awareness and enlightenment to those that have no clue what myself and many others experience. If I had it my way, there would legally be an optimal way to perform euthanasia/assisted suicide so I could donate as many organs as possible to people and persons that are fighting for their lives and have an actual desire to live and deserve to live (I feel I don't deserve to live because I flat out don't want to. My feelings about suicide have been the same since I was about 8). I'm saying this coherently and emphatically rather than simply from an emotional basis. It makes no sense to me to make assisted suicide illegal in most states and countries when there's others who are dying to live- children, adults, and even the elderly. My life could potentially save 1 or more persons AND I would be getting my wish as well. Personally, I think it's ridiculous that I'm essentially being forced to live simply because the idea of death and suicide is uncomfortable for certain people. Is it MY life or is it yours? Is my desire really selfish or is it actually a compassionate desire? When my mom attempted suicide in 2008 and ended up in the ICU I felt a sense of relief for her because I knew she'd finally be at peace after watching her suffer with depression all my life. Others might think this sounds strange or cruel, but unfortunately she pulled through.............. only to be diagnosed with ALS aka Lou Gehrigs Disease and died 5 years later. So she had to endure 5 more years of torment with depression along with one of the worst, most debilitating and devastating diseases. Why??? I'm a Humanist- not religious, so none of that religious retoric about it being a "consequence for sinning by trying to take her own life and thus ALS is the consequence she paid for it" is going to work with me. Try someone else! Ay, ay, ay! I didn't mean for this to go in so many directions, but I suppose this is the outcome when you've fought for so long and have regressed rather than progressed. If you made it this far, it means you can either relate or just might be as "looney" or suffering as badly as I am. Thanks for anyone who decided to hear me out. ❤ *And almost 4 hours later I'm finally satisfied enough with what I've written, grammar, punctuation, editing, etc) thanks to my Obsessive Compulsive Personality and Cognitive Issues I believe are an after-effect of the ECT Treatments.*

@@livingamongvultures736 I appreciate your words and feedback. Pretty much anything is helpful to some degree. I tapered off Seroquel because the weight gain made me feel even worse and I saw no improvement after 2 1/2 years. In the last 2 months I took myself off Lithium cold turkey (I know you're not supposed to) because I was hoping for some sort of progress- whether it be positive or negative. I wanted motivation SOMEHOW. I needed it. Unfortunately, even after stopping my Lithium cold turkey after being on it for at least 6 years I haven't felt any diffrence. It's been about a month and a half basically free from psych meds. Now I'm just on Klonopin and Ambien in that regard. I've had a plethora of diagnoses, been on close to 20 different psych meds +/- and combinations, 4 hospitalizations, consistent therapy of various forms, groups, 14 ECTs, since I was 10. I'm sure there's more I'm even forgetting. I even tried getting my DNA evaluated to see what meds my body might absorb/handle better but that hasn't been helpful. I'm still existing, but that's about it. I hope everyone else finds something that helps them. Until I'm gone I'll be trying to do the same.

@@JustJ-Me do you know anything about your date of birth, or how to read or write, any of your past?. I face some of these after my first ect. Second ect was with my wife, All I know where I wake. My wife says that was my will. But I don't know why. I recovered some but not everything cause I don't want to. Although I face problem meeting people outside.

Have you tried the ketamine iv infusion?

Psychoactive meds and all treatments have one thing in common - their mechanism are unknown. They work for some people and some others don’t. Find support groups, doctors for psychothearpy, or CBT. Don’t suppose chamicals work better than treating your brain as something with a soul. ECT can save a life but can also ruin a life. Nobody knows what it will do to you. TMS is a less-intrusive treatment but still they are last resorts. Try natural ways first.

I have been fighting major depression for four to five years and tried Zoloft Lexapro Effexor Seroquel Latuda all sorts of meds, only Zoloft helped a bit, but antipsychotics seriously worsened my depression. I was deemed treatment resistant but I refused to take more drugs. When I came to a neurologist she was very concerned about the meds toxicity in my body (psychiatries never addressed that). Finally I tapered all harmful antipsychotics meds and now tapering off Zoloft with my family and social support, I have been on meds three a half years with no signaficant improvement but now releaved symptoms with no meds. Depression can be cured, do not listen to those that say depression can only be managed they want you to be on meds for a lifetime so they can make big money

I do have quite a bit of memory loss but if I had the choice to start over knowing the memory loss would be what it is I would still do it. The way I was feel was worth it!!

@@sarahflesher1038 I would gladly give up old memories to have a good life going forward.

The way ECT is done now it doesn't hurt. The anesthesiologist administers both general anesthesia and a muscle relaxant. This means that although the electricity is causing a seizure in the brain, it does not cause a bodily seizure. Most of the ECT treatments I've gotten I have not had any residual pain, not even headaches. Some people I've talked to about it do get headaches though.

is not painful at all.

Don’t get it. Giving yourself a traumatic brain injury through an electrically induced seizure will do nothing to improve the life circumstances that are making you unhappy. Focus on changing your circumstances instead of searching for some magic cure-all that doesn’t exist. Electro-shock permanently impairs cognitive function and erases important memories such as what you learned in school, or cherished times with family and friends.

Anyone that says “circumstances are what’s making you unhappy” are the exact people you should NOT take advice from.

@@yearofvegan2007 when you contemplate suicide every day because of the "littlest things", you're far beyond that. I'd happily lose old memories I can record before treatment, for the chance to live and make new ones

@LAURIE B 3703 Did you get better have you found something that help. You Sound as desperate as I do . I am dying in the uk tms is not widely available so money people are suffering but there isn't much help here in for treatment resistant depression. In America yeah depression is high but treatment are available for your health through insurance and so forth.

@@angeldustsprinkles5186 My son has had 9 treatments so far. He is not suicidal anymore, but he is not happy. Meaning: He is still somewhat depressed. I've heard that it can still take the full 12 treatments before people can feel 100% better. Do you find this to be true? I will speak to the Dr. tomorrow. It is excruciating watching him go through this. It is hard on us as well....

You’re making a huge mistake. Every “treatment” is causing more and more brain damage!

Estelle Stone so happy to hear he’s benefitted so far! They’ll tailor his treatment plan to help him find what works best. And medication is typically used to help maintain, just like the author said. I hope you soon get your son back and I hope he can soon begin to live LIFE again. Living this way can be so torturous!

@@angeldustsprinkles5186 , you are full of it! Just because you don't like a treatment doesn't mean it hasn't worked for thousands, if not millions, of people over the last near century in the case of ECT. TMS is a lot newer and not as proven but is also being studied as a treatment for other conditions in addition to depression and OCD, for both of which it's FDA approved. TMS did not work for me but I would never tell other people they should not do any of these treatments. They need to do their research and make the best, informed decision for themselves. Conversely, ECT did work for me and turned me from wanting to die every day to giving me hope. What works or doesn't work for you, or me, or others, isn't the same for each person, so please stop spreading lies and discouraging people. Perhaps you could take some of that negative energy and channel it into a healthy habit or some volunteer work, and stop trying to scare people away from treatment(s) that could literally save their life.

YearOfLyingVegan, that's just a flatout lie. Side note: some people think that being vegan causes "brain damage." LOL. To each their own. ;)

She said no

@@laurieb3703 thanks have u gone through it and is it effective for physical symptoms associated with depression and anxiety dear i m very fed up plz help me and reply me

@@Amanullah-uv2fl I haven't started treatment yet but I'll keep you updated once I do!

@@laurieb3703 OK thank you

@@laurieb3703 OK thank you r u also suffering from depression and anxiety

Sadly

Wow, that could very well be. It looks like people party with Ketamine and that would mean its a very pleasant drug. Perhaps the woman in this video should try asking for a prescription for Ketamine to see if that's basically what was helping her. If so, then she can avoid the ECT and avoid the memory loss.

What is etc.

What is ECT?