Though it can be challenging, I hope anyone who watches this knows that it really does get better. Do not EVER lose your courage and keep persevering! 🤗✨🪩 HAPPY NEW YEAR 🥳!
I'm not really sure what type of books you're into, but I think you'll resonate with some chapters in the book "The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*cK - by Mark Manson". Some of the topic(s) you touch on in this video are relative to it and think you'll gain even more insight and value from it. Funny enough... I'm listening to it right now (7:45am)
Social media made people anxious and insecure and we have this fear of "missing out". Living the best life doesn't only mean bar hopping, partying, and travelling. Turning 21 in a few days and honestly what I learned so far is we should STOP dictating how people should live their lives. Everybody has different problems and responsibilities, and we can't deny some people are too underprivileged to have fun in their 20s. Your "worst 20s" could be someone else's best. 20s, for most (average people like me), is a stage of failures and character development. It's okay to breakdown and feel lost, I think it's important to just let people feel what they are currently feeling. We shouldn't be expected to suppress our emotions for the sake of pretending to live the best life. You don't have to live the best life, you just need to survive in life and that's okay. Edit: didn't expect my comment to get this much attention, I'm happy many people also agree with me
Right? I mean honestly things I am "supposed to do" do not interest me at all. I hate clubs. I don't particularly enjoy meet up with strangers (even worse if it's a place where groups have already formed). And just a bunch of other stuff that sounds cool on paper and is generally romanticised But the things I do enjoy...don't have an age limit. Okay. I didn't go to an art exhibition or get the chance to travel to Japan when I was 18. But what difference does it make if I do it at 21?
I’ve always had this checklist in the back of my head of activities I should be doing in my 20’s like bar hopping, clubbing, and parties every weekend. But I’ve never had people to go with. And that used to make me feel bad and embarrassed, as if I wasn’t interesting or cool enough to be part of that “scene”. I still feel a little bad about myself from time to time when I see my coworkers or classmates hanging out with huge friend groups, but I’m learning that having those experiences won’t make me more whole as a person, nor do they define my youth/20s. If I don’t drink and smoke weed at parties every weekend, does that make my youth any less important or interesting than someone else? No, of course not. Everyone’s path is different, and doing activities like the ones stated above are just one very simplified version of someone’s 20s. However, I’m realizing what I truly want isn’t the parties and the drinking; What I really want is true friendship and companionship. I want the party lifestyle because I associate that to being surrounded by friends, but I’m learning that friends can be made from any area of life, and that I just need to be more open and vulnerable to let those potential friends in my life. This was sort of like a journal entry but it’s very comforting to hear others in their 20s experience similar emotions.
@@nikibronson133 true, but these are years where while everyone is rushing to graduate, travel, find a job, marry, have kids, settle down, you try to rebuild yourself after having a difficult period and then it's hard to chase these things.
@@somekindofflower2024 I completely disagree… I think it’s a ridiculous notion to think that other people aren’t trying to rebuild or construct themselves but honestly rebuild from what you were a teenager you had nothing to rebuild from you were currently building yourself now. And it’s not harder to do these things… Because you don’t do these things in your early 20s you do these things over the course of your entire life. And when you say it’s harder to do these things because people waste their early 20s like what were they supposed to do because most of the years in your early 20s you’re still in school! It’s literally the starting out phase in life it’s called emerging adulthood. And that lasts all the way to 29 because life really doesn’t start till after that. I feel like because we’re so young we don’t realize that life continues after your 20s and you’re still young in your 30s. It’s the young or early adulthood phase before you reach middle adulthood phase. So you say and then it’s hard to chase these things… At what age because after your early 20s is your mid 20s and you’re still in your 20s and you’re a damn kid and you’ve only been an adult for less than 10 years! Hard to rebuild these things at what 26 ?? That’s so fucking young! And guess what people are always pivoting and changing things and traveling and graduating throughout their lives. I feel like some of y’all are putting too much pressure on yourselves and I get that because I’m 23 and I do the same thing but I’m realizing just how young that is and how young all of our 20s are. I feel like all of us have a very bad viewpoint on how long life is because we think it ends at 30 when it doesn’t even get started until 30 truly and most people hit their stride in their 40s! And I also disagree with the whole idea that people are trying to settle down and marry and have kids in their 20s. Maybe for some people and honestly culturally maybe white women but honestly for most people it’s not that and especially nowadays.
Turning 22 in April, and I don’t think I can even grasp how much time I’ve wasted. I’ve done nothing but be depressed and have such major anxiety about going out and making friends. I feel so stuck and alone, my responsibilities is so overwhelming and I just feel so lost in this loop, as if I have no point anymore. You know? I want to go out and have so much fun but then I think of all that could happen/go wrong, but then I feel so bad about staying home and not experiencing things, ah it’s so irritating😔😖
Yes!! Exactly!! Lately - and for the last year and a half - I felt like have wasted so much time. It honestly hurts me knowing damn well that I dedicated so much time to pointless things rather than using that time on things I KNEW was worth it. But even then, I am also - like you - in this loop hole where I continue to feel stuck and that I am getting nowhere while still feeling stressed about the things persistent in my life. I do not know if I am doing something wrong but it feels like I am getting nowhere and I feel and worry that I am still wasting so much time. I do not know how we are going to get through but I hope we find a way - as cheesy as it sounds, I truly mean it.
i FEEL this! but also we are only in our early 20s! I try to look at it like that. we have ~5 years to turn it around. and the best lessons come from being in pain/confused/learning how to dig ourselves out of a hole! xx
@@Adrianaxo. Same; I regret worrying in the past and barely realizing that I was always fine. I am going to try to be more present as well. To a better year 🍾😌💗 (lol, I had to put the little bottle)
I completely wasted my teens and the first two years of my twenties. I was homeschooled and literally had no friends during my teens and never got out much until I started working a retail job at 18 and going to college. Then COVID happened, and work was my only social outlet. When I was 21 I got heartbroken, spent a year doing nothing in a depressive spiral, made some “friends” who turned out to be toxic. I decided to take back my life at 22, travel, go back to school, do yoga, work on myself. It’s been a struggle but I’m trying to be optimistic about my future. Some people need more time to grow into themselves and that’s okay.
Turning 22 in April, and I don’t think I can even grasp how much time I’ve wasted. I’ve done nothing but be depressed and have such major anxiety about going out and making friends. I feel so stuck and alone, my responsibilities is so overwhelming and I just feel so lost in this loop, as if I have no point anymore. You know?
@@Adrianaxo. girl, I feel that. What gets me up in the morning though, is realizing that my life is too short to keep wasting more time isolating myself and feeling like a failure, and I don’t want to look back at my life and have any more regrets. As for socializing, it’s hard for me too but the bad experiences I had are common. I had to learn to set better boundaries, but that could only come with experience. You live and learn and do better next time.
Girl I did the same thing. heart break at 21 that screwed up my mind and sent me into a spiral. toxic behaviors. age 22 and onward is all about grounding, yoga, and self love! struggling is a good thing. it means a breakthrough is gonna happen xoxo have a good day xx
Dude, I was also homeschooled!! I had no clubs, no friends, wasn’t really even allowed to go anywhere, and then was 18 when Covid started. Im just trying to remember that youth is relative, it doesn’t what has already happened or not happened, there is still time.
I'm in my late 30s and only recently started establishing a career and financial stability. I wasted my youth not because of my choices, but because of disease and abuse. To be honest, I WISH I were 25 and had wasted my early 20s only. I understand how people in their 20s may feel, but guys trust me, things could have been worse for you. Forget about the wasted years and live your lives now.
Time is just a social structure!! Your best days could be in your 20s or literally next Tuesday. Don't let social media indoctrinate you that after a certain period your best life ended: for most of us our 20s were full of doubts, so our life just started!
I’ve “wasted” time. I sat at home being ill, dreaming, and dealing with my feelings after my mom passed. I was super nostalgic about when my mom was around and my high school days. Looking back at my diaries throughout my life, a theme came up: all my life, I was looking back. Looking back at the people I left when I changed schools, looking back at the girl I used to be when I was younger, I was always looking back and idealizing the past. But the moments I was looking back to now and idealizing were those same moments I kept avoiding when I was living them, trying to live in the past instead.. then I realized how much time I was really wasting, and how big of a foolish mistake it was. At 21 I thought I was *old*, and there I was celebrating my 25th birthday. My 25th birthday was when I realized I was still young and I better use that youth. You’ve wasted time ? Good, now you know it. And you also know you can’t get it back if you reach your hand in the past, so reach your hand to the future and start living :) ❤❤❤ most people waste time anyway. people are depressed over being unemployed because they want to do something yet people who work dream of not working so they can do things. people out here having their dream life and still unhappy so not in the moment ie wasting time. people getting sick and having to take literally years to devote theirselves to their health. people being abused. people with family problems. people who’ve never wasted time but are suddenly stuck and wasting time later in their life. we’re all on our own lanes. there is no traffic when you’re on your own lane. Sydney is 3 hours ahead of Perth. doesn’t make Perth slow. just start living 💫
🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂 Thank you so much because i also needed to read this. i was looking back even though i knew i wasn't happy at the time. i just want to stop the cycle to start living and laughing a little bit more everyday.
This was my same experience I keep thinking back when my mom was around and how nice those days were. She used to be the one who made me work hard for things i wanted and also helped me in studies. So after she passed i felt like i didnt know why I was doing this anymore. I know i need to get it together so I can settle on my life but still not having that person who always used to look at you and your achievements, happiness and genuinely was there for you all this time brings that ache and emptiness. Well, that's life
What a lovely thing to write 💖💖💖 I've been panicking about the self awareness this video brought (haven't even properly started the video yet), and reading your comment made me so calmmm 🧖🏻♀️🌱🍃
I feel like theres this underlying invisible pressure of having to "live your best life", "never say never", "have fun with everything you do", etc mentality (which is actually a really nice positive thinking right?) - but I feel like its so -all or nothing-. I feel like if u don't have exotic vacations 3 times a year, go out on fridays/weekends every single week, meet new people, constantly challenging yourself and trying new stuff then you're just "wasting ur life" and not "using it correctly bc its YoUr bESt YEarS"...i love slow living, doing absolutely nothing sometimes and choosing slow strolls at midnight without the "crazy" behind it :( I feel like not being young, wild and free is immediately boring, non-self-fulfilling and many other things that don't fit into the 20s theme! Im 21 and I feel like I've had nice experiences, nothing too crazy, and its possible the next 3-4 years will look no diff bc I choose to...and that doesn't make life nor my early 20s less worthy :)
Love this! I agree the theme of the 20s is sometimes just over the top, like it is okay to do the opposite if you like! I like the mixture of both, but I am extremely picky as to who I spend my time with and the environment that I am in too! It is time to get out of the mindset of "I wasted my 20s" or whatever age like no you did not. This is just the path your on right now and it will get even better!
Slow living~ love the sound of that I think more and more people are realizing how busy the world is. Busy with work (or trying to work) busy with school. Busy balancing a social life or busy finding a social life. Busy trying to take care of our environment. Busy trying to take care of our appearance if we are able to. Busy trying to do self care and being busy attempting to get a good sleep more than we actually do. Busy trying to heal. Busy with hobbies. Busy with taking care of those around us. Always busy. We are realizing how fast paced the world is when it’s not really supposed to be like that 24/7. That we are supposed to be able to slow down not meant to have to carry everything, and balance a very hectic life with all the needs and desires we have to tend to. I am very slow in almost everything I do. People say it’s not good to be slow but it’s not good to be busy 24/7 with no rest or slow days. I hope we can all find a day to be a bit slower at our own pace at least once a week of possible. And if not I just hope we try to slow down throughout our busy days. Sometimes it’s nice to think that life isn’t a rush at times it’s okay to slow down and not feel bad when we get the chance to.
I always felt this anxious without knowing it was anxiety when I was a teenager, I thought I'm being delusional and that this feeling is only coming from me and everyone is fine, one thing I'm so thankful for is discovering mental health awareness when I was 20, I'm still dealing with it and I face my feeling because this is the only way, but it makes it better to know that it's not just me and remember you're so strong for facing it every time and it's just feeling and not your whole life
I want to pray over you as well. I pray the Lord gives you unmatched peace and shatters the thoughts of the enemy that distract you from a wonderfully bright future. I pray you feel the blessings of God in every breath that it may follow you until your last, so that you may remember that God has been with you in every journey. Let the enemy not touch your mind with poison, but may God fill you with sights and wonders that renew the world for you. Let your chains and burdens be broken under the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. In Jesus name Amen 🙏
I also wasted my early 20's, started getting my shit together at age 25. Now 26 almost 27 and i'm killing it! It's never too late, but the sooner you start, the better!
i cried watching this. i'm 23 and i'm so scared of failing and not having everything perfect. i'm becoming self aware and when you're self aware, you're frozen in time. you know this is bad for you and yet you're still processing it
this is liteally me right now. i used to embrace failure but recently, getting presssurised by the peers around me, i found the need to succeed and know everything in general. its very exhausting mentally. ive started to fear failure and became controlling in every aspect of my life. Still trying to let go of this need to control...
no such thing as wasting time in your 20s. you need that time to recover from whatever happened to you as a child so you can get funky with it in your 30s
I think one of the biggest things I learned in my early 20s (I'm 26 now) is to live in a way that leaves me feeling content, not what some other person's ideal of what life should look like. I've never really been the type to go clubbing, drink, go to bars, smoke weed, and because of that, I didn't really hangout with a lot of people my age throughout high-school and university. Despite this, I am lucky, I've had and continue to have really close friends, and I have hobbies that I really enjoy that allows me to meeting new people and new friends all the time. Though, the missing out on parties or social events kind of ate at me for a long time. Eventually, I've just settled into being happy with what I like and being with the people that I want to be around, not what is 'cool' to other people. Thanks for the vid Celin!
@@CB-gi7kd If you're in high school or university/college, try and join groups or societies (e.g., rock climbing, dance classes, boxing classes, science groups, groups based on ethnicity) outside of class. In classes, some of my best friends came from being forced to work in groups with people I didn't know previously. Also, this goes for any place in life, but just trying to strike conversations with people is one of the best ways to find out if you have something in common with them. You'll get a lot of duds but you'll also meet people you can get on well with. Edit: To those still in school, having a part-time job can be a great way to meet new people. That's been one of the quickest ways I've made a lot of new friends recently.
Ahh! I'm only 15, but this makes me feel kind of validated :') I love hiking and I have a few creative outlets, and I've also been considering a part-time job (also because I am not involved with any school sports, so I want some more stuff to fill my time because right now studying for school is my only...thing). I'm also an introvert and a quiet person and my family moves a lot so it's more difficult to make friends, but the ones I've made are always pretty close. Thank you for this comment, stuff like this kind of let's me know that it's okay,, haha
Girl I don’t see this as you wasting time, you’ve grown so much and evolved (you still are evolving) you didn’t fail multiple times you found multiple ways that didn’t work for you, and this is the best way to spend your time. 💖
THIS PART! I am 26 (turned 26 on the 7th) and honestly never felt like I wasted time at all. Like okay I spent a ton of time alone and leveling up internally and all that but it beats being in terrible situations or with terrible people just to say I experienced something. I much rather experience life the way I desire, so if that means it's a little quiet rn I know that means it is only getting better! I love my life and am excited to see what is in store!
@@krystanicoleeee6022 THISSS! Ah i love your mindset girl and I love this for you. You perfectly said it, we should all spend our time like this. Happy belated birthday 💖🥰
I did the same things. Wasted my early 20's being too contemplative and anxious about the future. It's the time you're supposed to be carefree but somehow it isn't because you have such enormous pressure to start developing the life you dream of, and when it doesn't happen like you had always imagined, it's just beyond unbearable and the pressure and the feeling of being a failure is agonizing. You know this is the time that you are supposed to be setting yourself up for the rest of your life, but you have no experience and no idea how to do that so you end up in a paralyzing cycle of fear and inactivity, afraid to make a move in case it ends up being the wrong decision, with disasters in the future. I think in our twenties we live too much in the future. I am now in my late thirties and it's a relief only because I've learned to love myself and realize everything is just an experience. My life doesn't need to compare to others because it's my own.
I stumbled upon this video randomly and this was exactly what I needed to hear. I'm 20. I am currently struggling with a lot of things and my burdens and responsibilities are taking a big toll on my mental health. I am at my lowest and I feel like I am reliving the same day again and again. I no longer feel passion towards the things I was once passionate about. Thank you for this video. It's hard but seeing your struggles makes me feel like I too will be just fine.
I think your the last person I’m going to try to pray for in this comment section. I pray the Lord sweeps away your burdens and that your heart may be made light with unmatched peace. That your purpose reveals itself and your destination becomes the brightest beckoning light you have ever sensed. I pray you feel more alive for every pang of fear that made you feel as though you’ve lost it. May the Lord bless you with hope. In Jesus Christ name Amen 🙏
I thought I wasted so much time, by taking so many breaks from school, and comparing myself with my peers, I thought at 24 I should have a great job and have a ton of money but that's a lie. I learned so much and I'm happy I set up myself for the rest of my life, these years were so important to my psychological development and now I feel like I'm becoming the man I want to be. :)
It's not a waste, it's a clearing out phase---I like to look at it as this. My 20s were the worst, I felt like an old soul trapped in a young body. I struggled very much mentally. Everyone around seemed so normal. This made things harder. When I turned 30 everything seemed to turn brighter. Im 36 now and things couldn't be better for what I've struggled through, I do still have a long way to go but this is the process. Wishing you all the love, abundance, and happiness🙌❤️🔥
I'm also 27 and have suffered with depression and social anxiety basically my entire life, but I try really hard not to think of my life as being "wasted." Yes I could've lived voraciously and could've had many more experiences, but I'm also very glad that my life is relatively peaceful, healthy, I've had opportunities to travel and go to college, I'm close with family, etc. Try focusing on the good/positive aspects of your life and your perspective will hopefully change :)
Don't give up. Ups and downs happen in life. Just go with whatever you like and whatever makes you feel like yourself. Just remember to make yourself happy because no one gonna do it for you. Love you. Have a great day :)
I know life can be very tough sometimes but a good place to start is to focus on one day at a time...to focus on the present and to try hard to spot the everyday blessings🌼 Take care.
I can't believe that feeling depression and anxiety is synonym of wasting your time?! It's just our bodies and minds telling us that the culture we live in is not the box they want to be put in. And maybe we don't want to live in a box at all... Maybe it's just not meant for us to figure out life at 23 or 24, but to feel it, experience it, see it, express it with tears, laughter, quietness, patience. I've been through this mindset, I've thought that everybody around me have found their purpose in life, but me. I'm 27 now and i'm trying my best to be kind to myself. To see my life as something beautifull, to be grateful for my friends and family. To convince myself that the things I want for myself will happen whenever my body and mind are ready. It's not a competition and nobody will clap if I accomplish something 2 years earlier or later. In fact, accomplishments are not your work or the apartment you live in, but the strong connections you have with people, the smile you see in the mirror, the stress you have cut out of your life, the joy and peace of a good walk in the park. To whomever reads this comment: Please, don't compare with others. You're not doing yourself a favor. Just try to find your answers within yourself and listen carefully what your body and mind want, not what you will look to others. Just breathe and take very small steps - slowly and patiently. You're not wasting anything! This is life and life is HARD. Embrace that.
I’m 23 and I graduated from college less than a year ago and have gone through a lot of post grad depression. I’m not where I want to be in terms of career and have often at times feel like I’m already falling behind as I see my peers and people even younger than me achieving big things and traveling. Being a first generation student as well I feel like I have this enormous pressure to be the one to succeed and make a difference and have this pressure doing it all in my age group
I feel the same, I just graduated a year ago and moved to a new home that is further away from my friends. The drastic changes in my life made me feel burned out, hopeless and demotivated. I felt like I couldn't make myself to move forward and find a job, everything feels so dark and I don't know where I'm going. Social media didn't help either, seeing my college friends in their new jobs and living their life. It felt like I'm stuck and everyone is ahead of me. Now I'm starting to get a glimpse that I didn't "wasted" that year! I learned a lot about myself and really dig into why I was burned out, and feeling overwhelmed with this changes. I acknowledge and validate what I'm going through and the efforts that I exerted. Talking to my close friends helped too! And using small steps of taking care of myself (eat on time, sleep enough, clean room). And constantly reminding myself I'm on my own lane I don't have to compare myself with others. Reading your comment makes me feel that I'm not alone in this and I hope you get up day by day knowing what you feel is heard and valid. Take one step at at time, we can do this!
So far the only mistake I made was being so scared and nervous about missing out on my twenties that I didn't notice how amazing I'm doing and it only goes up
Wasting your 20s, for example, is being on social media all day and not looking for your purpose in life. Having no friends or social interactions. Being too afraid to go out and try new things. Not challenging yourself. Not working on your mental health. I did it for a long time.
I can relate so much. I’m 27 in March, I’ve lost my dad two months ago and it feels like my life fell apart, it’s so painful to lose a person you loved and I also feel like I’ve lost myself during my 20’s. I guess I’ve got a lot of inner work to do. Thank you for the video 💕
i am glad i came across this video, i am 20 now i will turn 21 this october. I am not very well academically, personally or mentally. I see everyone around me and they are doing so well and they are good at most things they do, and i envy them so much and hate them so much. I feel so stuck in this loop, like things are going nowhere i am not growing at all, there is no hope left. i have big dreams and ambitions but i know i am such a loser i will never be able to fulfil them. life is such a shit show now, and i feel so fucking lonely. i hope things get better for me, and for everyone else.
I can relate. Some of my friends are being financially independent, academically active and socially engaging and I couldn't do what they could do. And I hate to think that they have the skills that I really wanted to achieve the most but failed miserably. Then at night, even in mornings, there's a sudden struck of "enviousness" for them that hit me, then I would automatically hate myself for being jealous with my FRIENDS. I know i'm such a bad friend and I am trying to change that because I love them. I don't wanna ruin it just because of a fleeting emotion. But idk, it's really hard. I wanted to tell them truth of me being jealous of them but I don't think it's a good idea. Anyways, I'll just gonna pray for this. I am certain God can vanish this from my life.
hey I have an advice for you. Never feel hate or jealousy of people when they achieve things around you. Because you are creating these negative feelings and they manifest into terrible things into your life. just fill your mind with positive feeling like 'I am so happy for them' 'if they can achieve that I can too'. I turned 20 in December too:) and manifesting has help me a lot maybe it can help you too
You're not a loser dear, everyone is going through something similar and you're definitely not alone, in as much as things aren't going the way you planned just be positive. I pray that God guides you in whatever you do.
The 20s is literally a time of growth and figuring life out. I‘d like to change the golden 20s to golden 30s or 40s 50s 60s whatever. When you‘ve settled and figured out what you want to be like is the best time to shine. Until then, you shall cherish each day but don‘t beat yourself up because you had some failures while you were barely out of school. You‘ll do it YOUR way
I'm 27, mentally unstable, been insecure, seen my age group getting settled with life, like being married, having a stable job while I'm still at school pursuing medicine, but you know what, fuck it. I've learned my lesson and as I get older I cared less about what other people think.
I spent my early twenties figuring out how to live my life after graduation ( I finished my studies at 22 in 2020 when Covid hit). I also moved out at the same time and ended up working remotely as due to the pandemic I was failing to find a job in the city. I spent 2 years severely overworking as it was the only way to make ends meet and support myself, and then the war started. That's how I realized that not everything is under our control. Most of the time we are just trying to be the way we can. Cheers to everyone out there reading this.
the pressure and responsibilities during your 20s is no joke- i'm turning 24, just resigned from my job beceause i'm not happy & it's affecting my mental health. i thought i'm gonna be happy after sending my resignation letter, never knew i'm gonna be this lost & stuck. not sure what career to pursue either. the anxious feeling of failing and not being able to do well in the future is just unbearable. nonetheless, i know that i'm not the only one who feels this way at some point & i try to keep going despite the circumstances. hence, i am rooting for everyone here in the comments. i hope you guys know that you can take one step at a time, we're all work in progress! tysm celin for making this video, everything is so relatable. it helps me contemplate sm. you're an inspiration dear, bless your heart! 🥺💌
I didn’t have luxury to go out like others did. The paycheck to paycheck and finding myself in my career. I still have anxiety that it’s not all figured out at late 20’s. But as long as we are growing and learning boundaries. Thanks for sharing this video. Relatable ❤
I went through the same thing in my early and mid 20s, depression took the best of me and I had the worst relationship with myself. Now I am in my late twenties, and I have never been happier. All these experiences are not a waste of time, it helps us find joy and self love ❤ Proud of you ☺
the first one is so true. I study social psychology and there’s a study that tells you exactly that. The more ignorant you are the more you will think you are right and be less open to try understand the point of view of others. In our society being not extreme and super convinced in your ideas is seen as a weakness, instead we should recognize that is the first sign of maturity and intelligence
The part of the lost of your father hit me too close, I lost my dad just a couple months ago and I'm 20, and now thinking that he is not going to be in my future plans is soo difficult to process.
This was beautiful, I am 27. My 20’s are almost over and I’ve made so many mistakes but every year I’ve became more confident and my opinions have most definitely changed. You say that you don’t want to b a star but through this video I see one and your shine will keep on growing :)
I’m 19…I’m about to turn 20…I just feel like I’m not living like others girls at my age…all them look grown, mature, “that girl type of vibe” and I constantly compare myself to them feeling like a child. But I realize that i don’t have to become “that girl” cuz I am already. And I’m going to enjoy my live more
At 20, i wrote a diary how i struggled with social anxiety and needed a friend or two to hang out together so i could socialize and be a part something. At 22, i just recently figured how to make friends beside from college and make my social life better. It's the progress we talk here. (I will not lie i don't feel sad i found this technique earlier but that's life for you)
Turning 33 next week and I lost my dad 2 years ago. After I lost him I was straight reckless for the next year and a half 😂 I can't imagine what going through your 20s is like now compared to the 2010s. But what I can say, you and the rest of everyone in this comment section are perfectly normal and you're doing great! Your 20s are for learning these things, it's for experiencing the world around you and how you fit in it, how you can make it what you need it to be. You will change and change again. You aren't losing time, you aren't wasting your 20s, you aren't doing anything wrong. You're living, believe it or not. Make the mistakes, roll around on the floor thinking about what you'lI do next. Because no matter what you do, the lessons will come and you will learn them. Then more will come and youll learn some more. Life is a lesson and youll be learning for the rest of it, try not to add more pressure to the load. I know I'm probably sounding like every other 30+ y.o but wherever you are is fine, what's most important is maintaining your self awareness. I'm still young myself and this video applies to me too! I went through major transformation after 30, where everything looks different and I'm learning to navigate all over again 😆
I just turned 22 and I’ve lost the most of the past decade to mental illness. I feel like my life hasn’t even started yet, I’m not gonna dwell anymore.
I deleted my social media bc every time I went there I saw people always Havin so much fun and I felt like I was left behind , I left social media and just started to live life easy do things on my own pace still learning about myself and trying to go on with days ( turning 20 next month , wish me luck )
Thank you for this! I’m 21 now (I’ll be 22 in November) but I wasted my teen years and my 20th being stuck in a loop of depression and not being social! This year I want change!
" passion is great but no always reliable " LOVE THIS QUOTE , i sync with this one so much ,actually every person shall figure out the occupation that they have skills in , occupation which will pay them good money to survive , and the occupation they want which is their passion ! ( read ikigai :) , theres power in books im telling you
I immediately felt connected to this video at the start when you mentioned your dad's death. Mine also died, in 2017 and I'm also 23. I am feeling lost, literally something inside me shifted when I got 23 and felt like I missed on so much, but then my therapist told me that I was busy going through grief, and that made me feel better. When you go through a death, or anything else, like depression, you are busy tryin to find a way to live your life that fits You, while many others seems to have it more smooth. Everyone's trying their best. I really like this video, thank you for sharing it and good luck in your journey :)
Giiiiiiiirl this was an amazing video. As a girl in her 20s, I appreciate content like this. Thank you for sharing your experience and paving the way for many of us who feel anxious about the 20-year-old pressures. (Also, you have an AMAZING narrating voice!! Can’t wait to watch more of you 💖
I lost my dad in 2018 too. I'm so sorry. 🖤 Take it from someone in their early 30s, questioning your values and opinions and being uncomfortable is worth it. Hopefully we're going to be here for a lot longer than just our 20s and 30s. Figuring out where you fit in this world and understanding how it works in some capacity early on (and yes believe me we are both still early) will only set you up for greater success and happiness.
The perfectionist part really resignated with me. It's very difficult for me to let go of the need to control everything. It's making me absolutely miserable, especially when things don't go as planned. I'm just so tired of trying, because something out of my control will randomly pop up and fuck up everything I've been preparing for. Living has become like a chore; going to school, studying, keeping deadlines. It feels like I put in so much effort and get nothing out of it. No matter how hard I try, my life is still the same shit hole. I've started to hate my life and the world, my mental health is crumbling and I'm so full of hate and negativity. Idk how I'm going to get through this.
I was in the same spot as you last year. I actually ended up in the hospital for a week after a mental breakdown & hit rock bottom. Before that, I was desperately trying to control everything outside of my control because I lacked control over myself. My emotions, my health, my habits, what I was doing with my life, etc. None of that was going how I truly wanted it to. I lacked the discipline to get what I want. It wasn’t until I started to keep the promises I made to myself that life started to turn around for me (if you’re curious how, check out 75 Hard program by Andy Frisella). Let me just say this last thing… if you’re in a job, college program, or even location that you hate, don’t stay there. Not for another minute. Don’t do something you aren’t passionate about because you feel like you “have” to. You don’t “have” to do anything! You get to design your life, so do what you want. And if you don’t know what you want, just keep trying new things until something feels right. Life is too short to stay in a place where you feel unhappy.
As someone's who's turning 20 later on this year, this video could not have been in my suggestions at a better time. I've been so nervous about entering my 20s because I feel like I don't have it all together when I should.
I turned 24 about a month ago, 3 months after moving in a new city to try to get that reconstruction going. I don't think a day goes by without me having extremely dark thoughts but I learned to embrace them and keep going. For now I still don't see the point in living but I keep fighting in the hope one day I will. Thank you for the video.
I turned 20 a few months ago and turn 21 this September, and it took me a little bit to come to terms with the bad beginning I had to my 20s. In October, I called my mom and begged her to take me home from school, and she did. I was a senior in the college of my dreams but incredibly depressed, anxious, and still dealing with repercussions of not having been diagnosed with ADHD until just recently. I fully intend to go back, but still, I know I've ruined the picture perfect image I had of how my life would be going. Now, I'm taking my time to recover through therapy, engrossing myself in hobbies I didn't have time for in the past three years, and working at a job I love- even if it's not something that could sustain me forever. It's better, and I see another future for myself that I am alright with. Something I realized was that I spent so much time thinking about how I was wasting my 20s, that I didn't even realize I'm only barely five months in! Out of 10 whole years! I have so much time to look forward to and worrying about it will only make the time go faster.
Hello everybody in the comment section. I always felt purposeless, alone because I felt like I was wasting my early 20s. But more that I read comments I don't feel alone and I hope we all can start taking control of what we have.
Yeah I felt this way too just last year. But I'm 25 rn and I honestly feel a lot better about myself. I've got goals and I don't feel as insecure about achieving them. There's nothing really special about your "teens or early twenties" it's just an age. You can literally get your life together whenever you feel like it and it won't matter in the grand scheme of things. Also, everything you see on social media is usually not as it seems. No one is perfect.
This is everything I needed- thank you so much for this video. I'm turning 19 in a few weeks, and it's beginning to dawn on me that I'm only one short little year away from 20- and I am terrified. The thought of leaving my teens behind, and becoming a full fledged adult threw me into a whole mid life crisis, and I didn't know what to do or expect. This video you made was so helpful and comforting, thank you so much. I wish you all the best, and I wish all the fellow viewers and commenters the best as well
Hey! girl I really needed to hear this right now, I'm like in the same situation as you, I'm 23, & dont know what to do, but after watching your video, it was very inspiring! To never give up, move on, and to accept whats coming in for us! Keeping a positive mindset everyday! Thank you so much for the video!
I struggled in my 20s too, it's a difficult stretch, came into it in my 30s and quadrupled my income and understanding. Your name is a guide, I know a lot don't get that, but Celin is ancient and Loh is collector/gatherer. The industrial machine tries to force us into a conveyor belt/a product line - consumer/consumption - but our callings are all different - they want their vision(world) realized hence why many of us rage against the machine because it's forced assembly. Don't beat yourself up, just let the calling guide you - allegory is the key - meaning everywhere (irony). You matter, quite literally, that's why you're here. The best way to navigate a competitive, consumer based world is to look at what they say you shouldn't do - then you know you're on the right path - people believe we're just named randomly, but inspiration comes from somewhere inside, and the story puts things upon us for our journey. Just avoid the pills: red pill (wrath), blue pill (lust), black pill (chaos) (Blackpink = blackening of innocence (pink)). Don't do drugs kids, the world is a trip all on its own. TikTok, the whole time is running out - it's Wizard of Oz, wicked witch has Dorothy in a room with the hourglass and says she needs to give up her innocence (ruby slippers = Kansas rube - ignorance is bliss) or she'll die/turn to dust. Don't believe the hype.
When I just decided to be joyful I notices alot of changes. It was an eye opener knowing that being happy and joyful is something we forcefully can choose. Don't wait for the happy feelings to come, just take it by force, smile even when you are alone. Then inner healings can come. Headaches disappears, anxieties and depresssion goes away. Joy is the greatest medicine there is.
i am 22f and I plan everything, I have planned years. It gave me a sense of control. Although, now when i step into the actual practical world, i felt like i was losing control and felt like failing. My career achievements felt delayed, relationships ending felt like failing of my dreamt life. However, i have started to accept and move on more maturely. I have started to embrace the uncertain. I still plan my things but NOW, I DO NOT SHUT MY DOOR FOR OTHER POSSIBILITIES, it makes me feel more optimist and stronger!
I am a mom in my early 40's and this video was recommended in my list. I am always open for new videos from all stages of ages. I have to admit that i feel blessed for growing up without the toxicity , pressure and comparison of social media lifestyles. Bare in mind, a lof of us do not have the financial privilege to "enjoy" our late teens and 20's the way most vloggers do, but that's ok, because I do understand content is needed to make vlogs interesting. For me,being in an Asian family, it is about chasing grades and schoolarships because higher education is a luxury to some. But I am fine with that. That gave me a sense of focus and determination, as that energy was not utilized on activities that was not productive, not utilized to please and impress strangers or people we dont even like. The priorities as different when we do not compare ourselves to the fabricated expectations of what 20's should be. But anyhow, what you all have is your youth/health/time right now, regardless of whatever age group you are in. Nothing is a waste. You still have time. Pave your own happiness, you dont have to party if you dont like it, you dont have to travel if you dont want to. Do what fits YOUR need and wants, be it starting up a plant nursery , or taking up a musical instrument, bake or cook something that you have trouble obtaining from commercial establishments. As with dealing with death, with my current age right now, people around me are dropping like flies, and both the pillars of my life have passed on of old age, hence I am the pillar for my family now. It is inevitable but one thing for sure is that they who have passed on, will no longer need to struggle being human, feel the suffering of sickness and pain of being a human, and are no longer able to feel the pain of judgement that society these days so easily place upon even on a stranger who just wants to be themselves. They are free. Youth is a gift. It is where it is ok to make mistakes and you still have time to be adventurous with your course of life, a time where you are at your best to take on new skills, physically you are well and are able to handle minimal amounts of sleep and still get going. Each and everyone of us may not experience life on a same level, but your pain/ experiences/ suffering are valid and real. So guys and girls, you are still breathing and it is going to be ok. All you silver boys/girls/thems are going to fly. So to all of y'all out there, chin up, it's going to be alright, especially to the lovely girl who made this video, keep up the good work. Blessed days and evenings to all.
Just discovered your channel ✨ Thank you so much for making this video. It made me feel less alone in my own 20s struggle. I am 24 right now and I am still confused about what career to pursue because I am too good at too many things. Plus, I am a perfectionist too 😅 To anyone going through the same struggles, I want to tell you that we will do it in our own time. You aren't alone. Let's do it one step at a time 💛 All the best 💕
I’m gonna turn 20 in 4 months. What I’ve realized is that you have to PRIORITIZE your MENTAL health. Save money to attend doctor, save money to buy psychology books, analyze yourself with the rule of 5 why’s. (Example: Why am I bored? Because I do not do what I want to. Why don’t I do what I want to. Because I’m lazy. Why r you lazy? Because I’m afraid I won’t be able to master it. Why r you afraid? Because I’ve had a terrible experience of judgment and bullying). I’m gonna start my healing with psychologist cause I can’t bare it myself. I don’t have any energy, power left. I need help. And I hope that you will do everything to help YOURSELF to live the life you want to live
My 20’s were spent going through depression, anxiety, an unhappy marriage and health problems. My 20’s are a period I would not wanna go though again. Thanks for sharing.
55 seconds in and i started crying. I’m very very sorry about your father. I lost mine in 2016 and I’m now 23. I have been having to figure since he passed, who i am, and how to live this life without him here.
All I can say is that this video comes as a reassurance to my perspective of how the last three years have been for myself. Although I'm younger than you are, I have had very similar experiences from spending months in a slump because I couldn't get my self to work for a dream I didn't know if I still wanted to terrible short-term self-love hacks I believed were the cure for the way I was feeling. Falling back into a routine has made me realise how much time l could've utilised better. Recently something in my mind clicked and I have finally come to accept the journey I was on, all the gains and all the losses. I also understand that such an experience is inevitable in one's life that if not now it is bound to happen later. Going through it once does not mean that it'll never happen again. It may not look the same but there will always be those days that are meant to redirect your growth to a better path. You may not understand it at first but eventually I hope you find enough to appreciate. This three year pause is going to have so much more impact on my life further than I can fathom. I felt calm watching your video. Thank you for that.
As a 30 going on 31 year old, hearing a 23 year old say they "wasted"...2 years of their life? Maybe? Just doesn't land. I remember feeling that way. But life keeps going. That's only the tip of the iceberg. I guess another side effect of social media and FOMO is making people think they should have their life together at 23 -- which is insane. Youre still a child. Embrace the struggle.
This, she's not even close to the end of her 20s. It almost feels like a reflection after an odd point of privilege. But at least it comes from a place of kindness, and maybe it'll help someone else. The loss of a parent definitely spirals a "quarter life crisis" because grief is a freaking MONSTER. It just feels odd that *this* is the content and the video title it targets when it's so niave. This video diary will probably age like a fond/naive memory. I'm just glad it isn't harmful content and at least someone highlights that everyone's social media presence isn't how they actually live or feel daily.
@@jadetea6112 yes, I think no ill intentions were had, it's definitely a societal problem. I also remember feeling scared and anxious about my present - future at 23, having graduated from college, feeling like I had done so much and yet was so lost. Only time can grant that kind of perspective.
When I was 19, my dad was diagnosed with dementia and my whole world got so dark. I'm now 21 and it still hurts but this video helped me realize I'm not alone in suffering or in feeling frustrated with life. You truly are an inspiration thank you for making me cry and realize that even when life is dark, it doesn't mean I'll never see sunshine again.❤
It’s ok to feel alone, to feel pain, to feel like missing out. It’s ok to cry. It’s the process of healing slowly. It’s the feeling you currently have that are not permanent but temporarily at that moment.
I spent most of my twenties in school, hiking, or on my computer doing software stuff. I feel like I could have partied or socialized more but I find it difficult to do that. I think as long as you do something you feel is important you don't waste them.
I’m desperately searching for a path in life. All I want to do is calm down and enjoy the ride but I feel like the ride hasn’t started yet. Career wise I have so many passions but I don’t want to commit long term. I crave being free.
i love the way you make the script, the story telling are so great! please keep making videos because i think you are good at this and i'm so proud of you how you manage and be responsibility to what happened into your life!
We are all so young. I’ve accepted that 20’s is about trying things, taking risk, figuring shit out and sometimes just resting/being bummed/sorting through mental health. I think we’re all constantly learning and having hard times and making mistakes isn’t a waste. I’ve accepted my timeline is not going to be the exactly the same as my friend or my sister or anyone else. There’s no right time, just gotta figure it out & stay present. Also, this comment sounds very zen but I panic about wasting time too I just eventually come back to this thought.
Watching this while eating a brownie on my first solo trip to India, after having already cried a bit today... this really did help! Thank you and good luck on your journey! Sounds like you're doing just fine :)
Just did 20 in December 2022, and I was already feeling like a loser with no expectations in life, putting pressure on myself to have a glow up, but actually didn't anything in January so I was feeling bad. This made me feel a little better, so thank you so much! Also, I'm really sorry for your lost, it's never easy to deal with thouse situations...I hope you're doing better now! All the love and positivity to you!
"Life is harsh and unforgiving. Dont expect it to treat you nicely, its here to take you out. You dont have time to be fool" That is lesson my grandpa told me when he had heart attack. i dont need to tell you did i waste my 20s. Good luck.
I havent entered my 20’s yet, but I’m glad I saw this video before I did. I’m currently 18, so I was in high school during the worst parts of covid. Due to this, I ended up being homeschooled from the last half of my Sophomore year to my Senior Year of high school. I’m currently in my second semester of University, and I’ve been doing online school because I’ve been really sick. But mentally it’s been bad. It’s been hard to not feel like i’m wasting time. Like I should be doing more. Covid stole away a lot of what could of been as a teenager for me. Now that my 20’s are up next, I don’t want to have that same experience. But it’s easier said that done. I don’t even know where to begin with changing things, but maybe this is my time of reconstruction like you mentioned. But I hope I’ll come out of better and stronger than ever before. Thanks for your video.
I just turn 27 and had a new born On Oct 19 2022 & I still don’t have it together….. but i know that i can always change that… is never to late age is just a number !!!!
I am turning 20 in 7 months,i am the kind of person that don't plan much,i live the day as it comes.I set small goals,like overcoming my anxiety and i appreciate the small steps.I think people overwhelm themselves with a lot of expectations and once they don't achieve everything they feel helpless and say they are failures.Take it easy.Be kind to yourself, after all life is the art of sailing not rowing.
no idea why this video showed up in my recommended but this really got me thinking and quarter-life crisis is a very normal part of life! All the best to everyone in the comment section
I love this so much, and when I saw the view-count I was genuinely surprised, as watching the video I thought the production quality was over the top, I can’t believe this video is so underrated Thanks for sharing your experience about your 20’s, as well as touching on more sensitive topics that, I find commending that you’ve decided to share it with the world
All I can say is that there's no wasted time , it is experience , very important experience for your self-growth . Everybody has their own tempo , different timings and lives overall.
I think , we should go easier on our lives sometimes. If I feel way too stressed out I like to think about overall point of life , and turns out , there's none. We are the ones who created it. And it makes me feel more on ease , like , c'mon, it's impossible to loose if there's no win . Global thinking makes usual duties seem less painful
Such a beautiful video, thank you for your vulnerability, turning 20 in April, i have a lot a passion for the things I love to do, and I see myself always being afraid of them despite the fact that I really can achieve my goals. That’s perfectionism I strive for is an illusion and I have been trying to get it out of my head while still holding and working my life with discipline. It’s so hard to balance it all, but these are the years where I’m really trying to do that.
Be thankful everyday, because it could be much worse. I had chronic illness for 14 years (16 to 30 years), so I had no 20s to speak of. I was prone to infections and was contagious on close contact. Despite this I’m thankful for all I learned during those 14 years, how to be a surrogate father to my now deceased much younger brother (RIP), despite being ready for marriage as a teenager having the discernment to forgo it (and any personal life) until I was cured, intensified my faith in Jesus, learned patience and perseverance, learn effective communication (active listening, etc). I know my situation is mild compared to others, I’m thankful I was able to come out on the other side. Disclaimer: this isn’t a compare, it’s to let you know that every experience has a lesson behind, and regretting a past that was out of your control can only work against you.
