IMPERIAL NOBLES: SCREW THE RULES I HAVE MONEY | WARHAMMER 40K LORE 

Perfect fit Imo

My mental image is cross between President Comacho from "Idiocracy" and "Crocodile" Dundee in sleeveless three-piece suit.

@@andreykuzmin4317thanks now I can’t get that image out of my head

@andreykuzmin4317 I mean thats literally Saxton Hale but in a three piece suit instead of just booty shorts.

That is 100% for sure. Saxton Hale but more Catachan style, still probably has a killer mustache and hat.

meh, so long as you're in the first or second generation then you're generations away from the invasion, so, good life i suppose.

*GEEEN STIIILÖÖÖRS* -inquisitor

@@Ironbattlemace They steal jeans

Grice. Just Grice

There is a necron cult, but u re just mind controlled by a necron nano machines

They choose their leaders through a grueling series of trials involving Barking Toad catching, Catachan Devil wrestling, and building a settlement with nothing but a knife, a ball of string, and a pack of chewing gum.

He will be back!

Sadly, obtaining the Title also came with signing away both his Spine and Testicles. This Tradition was established with the First Governator of the Old Territory known as California.

Anything official is signed sly Marbo and the imperium has no choice but to believe it

Honestly i think it'd be funnier if the Planetary Governor of Catachan would be a giant barking toad.... Like one day it hopped into the governors office somehow and since then it is a locked of biohazard zone. In Memory of this and since everybody is too scared to open that door again somebody else does the work but the official governor is that toad^^

I think one of the reasons is also "Looked at me funny"

The Inquisition will remember that.

..

Radical Inquisitor be like: Yea let the fancy man have his fancy jewel. Not like he knows how to use it. I've got other bullshit to worry about

@@gustavakerman2566 eh, that’s just a pragmatic inquisitor. Radicals try to use the xenos’ stuff for themselves.

in fiction and in real life.

I AM THE LAW!!!!

Sad but true!

All I'm gonna say is that a lot of Rogue trader is a direct satire of Thatcher and her government: the subjugation of the working class, the engaging of long distance war for the lionisation of the empire, growing xenophobia, excessive red tape, crumbling infrastructure an administration, religious fanatics engaging in terrorism for the sake of independence...

In the lore, rejuvenant gets you to around 400 or so before you get diminishing returns. It stops working completely at some point, but it doesn't say when. For true immortality you gotta turn to cybernetics. Cybernetics work forever with proper maintenance cycles, but getting that shit is expensive cause you need to replace a LOT of stuff, and some of it has to be made custom. So a planetary govener has to get the attention of a magos who has the time to make immortality implants, make an offer the magos accepts, which can be difficult, and then has to not die while the implants are being made. This is an expensive process and a govener can push himself to the brink of bankruptcy just to afford the good shit shit. Cheapest is to have a box packed full of pumps and filters and get locked inside like Mr House from New Vegas. Getting good borg stuff while still being able to eat, drink, and have sexy times is much more expensive. Also, you can still get shot, so good luck with that. Funnily enough, to save money implants from a dead govener may be passed town to the heir, which results in dying princes killing their dads to get the implants. Can't have shit in the Imperium.

Headcanon: The Governor of Catachan is just Arnold Schwartzenegger, but with the hair growth of a dwarf, and he has come to a mutual understanding with the Catachan locals. 'I will respect you, and you will respect me', a pact of mutual strength and apex honor. ... Either that or it's a clone-twin of Sly Marbo because fuck it why not. EDIT: I may have just described the same person twice, but you get the rough idea.

@@Volvith according to what lore I can find, the govener of Catachan is a foreigner appointed by the administratum who sits in orbit and has never set foot on catachan. Based on what catachan is like, "not setting foot on catachan" may not be a bad thing.

​​@@TheAussieBlue I'm surprised they haven't had a "catastrophic failure in orbit", given the Catachan authority issues

​@@Volvithor Saxton Hale

So that's why I often heard that their body horror is similar to the mechanicus

@@spartana1116 There's a reason all those pictures of planetary governors had them with tubes sticking into every part of their body. Under all that finery, they're a slowly decaying sack of meat kept going long after their natural lifespans by an entire Radioshack's worth of hardware.

Ouch!

Yeah, is it true that if they push it too far they can morph into a kind of materium version of a demon? I remember seeing art that looked like a governor who'd been melted like a candle and had this horribly wide, needle toothed grin.

@@kieranadamson3224 I never heard of that unless it's that time a noble family unknowningly had chaos taint in the bloodline cause of one of their ancestors forced one to turn into a chaos spawn during a inquisitorial interigation

It's the cover of one of the Vaults of Terra books. The plot of the books do involve the Custodes, yes. Its not really a retinue thing or one of those weird custodes protecting vital individuals.

Yeah, but inquisition has no authority over Custodes. In fact it's more of the other way around, but custodes don't care or need to bother with using that power. Honestly in that scenario I would be more worried about what made Custodian get his ass all the way over to me. That would be the scariest part

@@Azrael178 JUST PRETEND I AM NOT HERE, MORTAL

Ten seconds to think of a planetary governor name? Glutius Maximus Esquire XXI

@@Azrael178 I actually just finished listening to the book they're talking about. And yeah, it's pretty funny seeing an Inquisitor try to order a Custodian around. The Custodian is using the Inquisitor, not protecting him. It's an ok book, but pretty decent by 40k standards.

How is rogue trader?

Cadia's upper crust can't really afford to fuck around, because they'd find out real quick.

Cadia is like prussia. Cadians are an army that happen to have a planet.

Well Cadia is also the poster boy of the IG (even now despite being blown up) so of course *their* Governor is the exception. lol

And now Trazyn got him as part of his collection!

​@@Dracobytewith "the last castellan of Cadia" or "planetary governor that is not a dick" nameplate under the exhibit?

'Secret'. Not sure how secret a literal tunnel in the sky can be.

Wow!

​@@jemman2906 I imagine it would be camouflaged as architecture wherever possible.

In Rennaisance "oh no he got stabbed in public!" Italy not wanting to walk with the populance is a decent survival strategy.

@@jemman2906secret used to mean private kinda like the Vatican’s secret library

A noble son wanting to buy a new outfit during an active siege calling a servant who is actively fighting a chaos invasion.

SOME REAL BADONKERS

Some huge bazonka hongaroos!

Considering Bricky is looking after their merch, I'm pretty sure they're on good terms

His content is really good!

Thanks for the info!

Do not let the temptations of Slaanesh get to you brother, always stay beside our best girls: the Adeptas Sororitas

@@davisdf3064 the Adeptus Sororitas are welcome to join Slaanesh :3

Couldn't find an insult here even if I'm trying

@@12SickOne34 I think he meant that sleep implies it was boring

Hey that's awesome, glad you could find some solace here. Btw if you want to talk about it I'll listen, probably won't talk to me ever again so no strings attached

@@roguepsykerhaaker4813 I appreciate that but its more of just surviving the winter cold(coof maybe). But I appreciate you offering, it means a lot when Im usually the one to offer so thank you lol

@@chowrites6179 No worries my guy

See that was your problem, you didn't go to spire Redlands

Can someone explain what is the Inland Empire?

@@Fpwc2 it's an area in socal between the coast and mountains. Temecula does not count

​@@Fpwc2San Bernardino and Riverside Counties in Southern California. It's East of LA by about 45 Minutes and has a HUGE rivalry with LA. The nicer Spots are pretty much limited to Rancho Cucamonga, which you may remember from the Cheerleading Classic Bring It On as the Competitor Team that had the same Jazz Hands Choreography at the first Cheerleading Competition. It's the only place I can recall Rancho Cucamonga appearing. I think it's also where Ice Cube in Next Friday relocates to (Where DayDay lives initially).

​@@xXNoobKillaXxEh, Redlands was kinda the Boonies. I did live in Hemet for about a Year. That place also sucked big time. Half Tweakers and Ghetto, Half Old People waiting to die.

Origin story: A 21st century Japanese office worker who comes across a time and space displacing warp storm at a certain time of year, at a certain time of day, in his part of the country, localised entirely within his kitchen.

who made Cain a governor?

@@SirBrasstionmay I see it?

Hmm by that measure so is the emperor himself an avatar of all 4. He spent thousands of years manipulating humanity like Tzeench, was a being of perfection like Slaanesh, Instituted the Great Crusade making even Khorne blush and now decays upon the golden throne in tribute to Nurgle

@@ClaireFelidae Inquisitor, right here. Jokes aside, to my knowledge we still don't know what exactly happened on molech when emps supposedly made a deal with the CEOs of chaos, and a little inspiration and on site training doesn't hurt, does it? XD I just think it's neat to have the overarching conflict, with chaos being so moldable that you can layer it upon almost every "small scale situation" like nobles or the emperor, and the struggle of keeping discipline to not tilt too much or you'll fall to one of the four. As long as you don't lean to a single side too heavily all of their teachings and aspects can be used for "good purposes" (perspective and such) but it's so easy to go that last step and doom your sphere of influence.

Wheels opun wheels of machinations and conspiracy, like Dune.

I also love the Pizza Tower OST in the background!

Steve might know a lot about animals, but he wouldn't condone hunting them for sport :/ Saxton Hale would tho >:)

Irwin would be too nice to exist in 40k

Considering the shit they have done!

1000% accurate

10000% accurate

The celestial dragons are basically 1 to 1 40k nobles.

I guess they are even worse, the nobles of 40k

Considering what passes for "food" in the Imperium, rich people shit may be a better meal than normal

​@mightykanohii I mean. Scrape exists.

Hahahahahaha!

I love that you know about Pallas Cats but that altitude bit's not actually true -- they do thrive at high altitudes but it seems to be more about the cold and isolation, and if they have that they can live happily right down to sea level. The Korkeasaari Zoo in Helsinki is on an island and keeps them, with a kitten born this year :D

Ouch!

How dare ye!? To the sump dumps with you!

Eat the rich!

Revolutionaries never get it, if you're stupidity is successful, you won't be the ones gaining power; you'll be the ones gulaged/round up and shot...

​@DagsTheBarbarian Fouche and Talleyrand: well, this happens if one doesn't know when and how to change sides...

​@@PobortzaPlI believe we call those people traitors, and they are treated particularly well either...

Tbf LIJ merch goes hard

So... Saxton Hale from tf2

why?

@@princekrazie why not ya git? stoopid humies could always use an ork at dere side.

Hoping this is a Proppa Krumpin'/A Vox in the Void reference.

​@@darthslainOI! DEYZ GIVIN ME DA DAKKA! SOD OFF!

And now is voice acting for a videogame!

Erased from history

DK... Donkey Kong! Sorry I could not resist it.

My boy has improved over time!

I also love the Pizza Tower OST in the background!

@@Dracobyte that’s the part I love about the whole thing. I’m new to the hobby, so his surprise is my surprise, lol

It's just the Mr. Universe competition, like who can flex the most.

America isn't that old yet as a separate entity from England at least

@@conorflinn600 yeah, still needs another 53 years, but I get where he’s coming from. 🤣

I hope and pray for her sake it was one of the nicer chapters, whose response would be to look at their armor, make a note that thar will buff out, and then go "Don't do thst again or we will have a problem." Because otherwise I'm struggling to comprehend how that astartes and his nearest battle brother didn't just straight up tear her in half.

@@andrewgause6971 It was the Iron Snakes chapter. An Ultramarine successor who are pretty decent chaps. If my memory serves me correctly, the Iron Snakes were aiding a planetary evacuation, and the noble just didn't much care for his tone. The space marine was befuddled, even tho the shot did jack shit to him. Thats when the Inquisitor came around and told the lady to fuck off. I think it happens in the Iron Snakes short story collection by Dan Abnett

I also love the Pizza Tower OST in the background!

O hey the word bearers are here

I also love the Pizza Tower OST in the background!

I also love the Pizza Tower OST in the background, during the calzone segway!

Runaway noble?