Is He Wasting Your Time? (7 Clues He 100% Is!) 

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I had a four-year relationship with a guy who told me right off that he had fears about marriage due to his parents divorce. He was faithful to me, but of course, we didn't get married. I got into the relationship knowing about his fears. When someone tells you who they are, believe them.

99 problems and a man should never be one of em. Keep your life drama free. Focus on your goals and dreams. Always remember to never expect anything. Life is short and always do what makes you happy. Never find happiness from anyone else. Build and make your own happiness because anything could happen tomorrow and tomorrow is definitely not promised. God bless you all beautiful people 🙏❤️

One of my biggest pet peeves what a guy does when he isnt interested anymore. He starts taking a long time to respond to your text and try to get you to stop talking to them.

First sign 🛑 you are watching this video...

It makes me not want to be interested at all in the dating period

My husband block me on Facebook! So on his last single minded trip being MIA for two months ... I divorced him!😂

He told me that he wasn’t ready for a relationship after using me for about a year. A month later he got married to a woman he met on a business trip to China. This ruined me.

When a man tells you he’s “separated” but still lives and sleeps with his wife.........run the other way 😕

I broke it off with a guy who said he loved me after I realized he just wanted me as some sort of collector toy to keep on his shelf and pull down and play with when he wanted to. When I tried to have us spend one weekend per month together (he lived over 4 hours away), he said no. I get that he was in Medical Residency and had a crazy life but when I found out he had plans with his family, with his friends and colleagues at work etc but wouldn't make them with me, I figured starting out at the bottom of the totem pole of a relationship wasn't a good place to start. Where would I end up? In the dirt probably. If I wasn't important enough to place even near the top of his priorities, then our relationship would never work...regardless of saying "but I love you" when I broke it off. You may love me, but certainly not enough to place me in the right position in your life. God bless~

I had a guy I dated back in the summer, and after our first date he was very wishy washy. He'd not text me for 2-3 days and then be really keen again. He even said that he changed jobs "partly for us" ... he got blocked after that

Ryan Patrick is the best Dating Coach ever!

he literally caught me having a crush on him in 2 months 😂 and he said he's not ready/don't want a relationship but it took me about 1year to process it . still trying to move on

When he acts single on social media and/or there is no picture of you on his profile. Proud boyfriends show off their girlfriend at least after 2-3 months of being together.

I wish men were totally honest and not play games,hot and cold,wishy washy and play with your emotions and they know they are so they keep doing it.Until you annalize him, his words and his texts and figure him out.Then you can write him off as it's his loss.

Is he wasting your time or is he just a Gemini

On dating apps when they ask for my personal information before we even see if there is any basic compatibility or agree to meet in person.

one sign that definitely let me know that a guy wasnt serious was the fact that they kept changing their location on hinge. We had already gone on several dates and I know I shouldn't be checking up on his profile but whenever he went on a weekend trip, HE CHANGED HIS LOCATION. For hinge, you have to manually change it so it just let me know that I should drop him.

One wouldn't walk beside me in public. Another never complimented me on anything...I didn't even know if he liked me.

My ex-husband is a honeymoon pro! Even when we were married he- about 4 or 5 other women that I eventually learned about. Right when he was done with them he was restarting the honeymoon phase with me- love bombing because I was about to find out his secrets. My sister is dating a guy who is king of excuses! And she backs up the excuses every time!

One way was that he never wanted to introduce me to his daughter, even after we'd seen each other for several months. He also did not want me to meet his father. I realized it was because his father had met another woman he was seeing and thought that she was his girlfriend, meaning of course that I was the side chick. Adiosed out of there and have never regretted it.

Long distance, low texting ability after a little while, gave me a red flag it was over

If your # is stored in his phone as a guy's name, he doesn't want other women to see your calls/texts

Consistently changing plans last minute.

I just need advice on why while I am getting to know a guy he doesn’t call me when I ask? They all use the excuse “not feeling well” or “o fell asleep” or “I was working” or the one pisses me off most “I am busy sorry” like really why is it so hard to get a guy to call me on the phone if they say they want long term relationship too 😡

I was in a 8 year long distance rs I wasted almost a decade..he never came to me I always went to him no comittment..

In terms of delaying milestones, I have found that those relationship milestones have been delayed just becos of corona. I am not able to see people as frequently and a majority of the dates have been virtual. Should we expect that those milestones should still follow the same path even though we've only seen each other a handful of times and the rest has been virtual?

Ryan, I don't understand why men are rude and attack you personally when you politely decline their advances on an online site. Can you explain this behavior as you said in a previous video that we should always politely decline if we're not interested?

Ryan - let me know what guys have done to lead you to believe there wasting your time Me - breathing

When a guy proposed but every time you want to talk about living together he changes the conversation 😑😒🤨🤔😑 ah NEXT

Unfortunately, if you have to ask...he definitely is!

Hi Ryan, could you do a video on how to move on and heal from these type of men x

He says he wants a dedicated Relationship and says he is serious. Texts a few times every day...but the texts are "miss you babe" and "How's your day?". The convo in person is even less. And in person he interrupts every other word I say with kissing me.

I had this thing going on with a guy I met through a friend of ours. After a while it was really hard to have time with him alone because his friends where always around and he put no afford at all to spend time with me alone during the day so i also got realy close with his friends. then he told me he isn’t really comfortable with me being so close with his friends because of past relationships. and when i said i want a real relationship not just something in between he said he is not ready for it because he is still so traumatised from having cancer.(of course it’s very traumatising and nothing to joke around but seeing him making jokes about it made me skeptic but i thought it was his way of dealing with is) fast forward he simply started to like “fade” and while we were still having a thing going on i found out that he got himself someone new. i took revenge and had than a thing going with one of his best friends. than i was suddenly interesting again. looking back i feel so stupid :)

He was over the top in the beginning calling and texting all day long. Posting all kinds of romantic memes on FB. By the end of the first date, he snoozed his bumble, by the second date, he deleted it. I remember telling a friend that I felt he was coming in way too fast and I felt a need to observe. Sure enough by the fourth month of dating he got super inconsistent and became a complete "f#(&boy"

I met a very nice guy , he was already in a 3 year relationship , but he told me he wanted to be with me , because he thought I was the right one for him and he left his girl by choice. For 2 years he told me this. Unfortunately he found someone else after I believed him and he went completely silent before he had a new girl and he told me nothing. He told me when he left his girl , that he didn't want a relationship with me right away he needed some time. But then a few months later he got a new girl. I wasted my time by believing him.🌸

I've just gone through this Ryan, Just yesterday. God it hurts. Lesson learned x

How to accept that he is not serious for you and you have to leave? Feeling really difficult to move from this kinda man🥺

Slow fade... I was talking to someone online who came on strong and I thought we were really connecting. We couldn’t physically see each other because of COVID, but now I’m wondering if that was actually what he wanted. We had a three month texting/calling relationship which was great but I guess in his mind it ran it’s course. His texts were always nice, but became less and less frequent.

He told me he wanted to ship a 80 thousand Mercedes with 20,000 dollars in it. Do you think this Is a red flag? Lol. And he wasn’t really interested in sex. And he said he was 45. And he text me all day long for weeks . And said he wasn’t really attracted to my looks but my kind heart. What you think about this? Anyone. else had dealings with this guy?Another guy was from America and spoke English but when I asked for a video chat he only did a voice phone call and had a authentic Mexican accent. I ask to explain that one and he. said , “ I can’t explain t”. There are some shady characters out there. And I have run into a couple other imposters. Be very careful Lady’s. You really have to be a detective when it comes to Facebook.

Well there’s something wrong with me because there were a lot of feelings I was having and I had to literally turn off my feelings and can’t get those back after turning them off.

His sister got married and they hosted the reception at his house. When i asked him about the wedding he minimized it like it was just a small church thing and i only knew about the reception because of social media. Earlier that day he messaged me that "we were next", as in getting married. I told him time will tell that story. I confronted him about some of the challenges i had in the relationship and he broke it off because he "couldn't be what i needed from a partner and but we could still be friends and hang out and stuff" *rolls eyes* moved on!

Dated someone after my Divorce that was a mama’s boy. Never being out on his own, had loser friends, afraid to stand up to his mom, constantly lied about the future & no ambition! Let’s not forget insecure & controlling!

I haven't gotten through this whole video but.. I just wonna say, I remember commenting on one of your videos one time about a guy.. He now has a girlfriend and I'm happy for him, I'm even happy for myself! Because now I have a girlfriend! Me and him are just friends and nothing else now, I'm happy how u inspired me to do things what I have never thought deep Into, thank you, I will always and keep watching your videos- and uh I'm on my sisters' YT acc rn tbh but I'm the one that uses this one but yea- thanks alot!

Guy said he wanted to move on and be happy again but never made the effort while we were in a relationship and rarely spoke to me at all and couldn't get over his ex 😒

Yep, still melting when it comes😃-the "right now"- smile. Can't help it😉 Absolutely and always be friends first! -Genuine, sincere friends 👫❤

Only one example needed to show they are wasting my time.... Breathing.

Honestly this video makes me think its hard to find that someone. Uggghhh! Feelin desperate already. Hahha truth slaps.!

Question please: I am simply unable to find a quality man and I am sick and tired of losers. How could I find quality men?

OH MY GOSH YOU ARE THE ONLY DATING COACH WHO DOESN'T SUGAR COAT IT.....YOU SAVED ME

Wow Rayan! You nailed it👌🏻 I wish I saw this video 2 months ago. You just talked about the exact scenario, I went through. Your videos are awesome and I started sharing them with my friends as well. Hats off to you!

Well I been with my boyfriend 8 months well until Feb 13th I ended it I never his mom or his dad and I never went to his house not even once and when I asked he always had an excuse

How long did it take you and your wife to move from friendship to romantic relationship?

My ex was talking to someone when he was with me and failed to communicate with me and got shady with me so when I found out I broke up with him

He introduced me to all of his best Friends. And about the two month mark his best friend of 20+ years had said to him hey it seems like you guys are in a relationship. He adamantly said no we are not. I knew right then and there it wasn’t gonna work at all.

Ryan, if I said the things that men have done to confirm that they were wasting my time; I might as well begin my dating memoir. 😆 😆 😆 However I did meet someone this year that seemed very well put together in terms of education, career driven, sense of humor, family oriented, materialistic items and even looks but as time went by he would want to see me too much and I simply don't have the time and I limit my in person interact with people because of the 19. I say all that too say that, if that man wasn't wasting my time he wouldn't have had so much time on his hands to even want to see me that often. So when I would decline he would become agitated, major RED FLAG. It was a major turn off because I too live in Los Angeles, California and we are ALL restricted to our outside regiment so I am now back in Grad School because in order for me to find what I am looking for, I have to become that. I am a early childhood educator and my students and my children need me now my wants and needs can and will wait. Love your content Ryan Patrick. Happy Holidays to all.

Well when you just meet a person tell them you just want friendship they fall in love then they want you I’d your social and personal stuff and it’s military all the time I’m just fed up

That look on ur face Ryan!! I died 🤣🤣🤣🤣

These are great, but dating during the times of Covid, some of these guidelines can't apply. Like...we can't mix with our friends or family, we can't go out for dinner to a restaurant or movie. Yes, stay at home nights are more prevalent, but the dating "game" paradigm shifted. Its hard. Really really hard, figuring out what is actually going on with the relationship and how..thanks to Covid. Maybe you can reevalute the standard hints/clues and adjust for today's world?🤷‍♀️

He acted in the beginning like he was interested in pursuing me, and I mean calling and texting multiple times a day...Then after about a month or so, he started wanting phone sex, btw we were long distance...Once that happened, and mind you I wasn't all that comfortable with it, but I thought, Hey! We both have needs, right? Then to my surprise, he decides to book a trip for me to visit him in person, he made these great plans that we were gonna go to Disneyland for the day, and rent a room at Disney...Wow! Huge! Right??? After that he calls me all excited and says, "I bought you a gift for when you come here!" I'm thinking a birthday gift, like maybe a piece of jewelry, a nice top, you know, something I'd really like! So what did he get me? A vibrator! 😳😩 There's a lot more to this story, but I'll try and fast forward... Finally I decided it's time to have the, what are we? 🤷 conversation...He was fumbling his words and acting hesitant to answer, but finally blurted out, "I'm not looking for a relationship"...He said we'll just kinda go along and see where it ends up, and put a lot of emphasis on the trip to see him...I took that as, well, if we're compatible we'll take it to the next level...who wouldn't, right?? So from then on I was getting the mixed signals, weekend disappearing acts, and the quick few word texts that are classic signs of "not interested"! So I kinda backed off and told him that I changed my mind about the trip and I just wanted us to be friends...He said, ok, and he understands, and is not angry about me cancelling...We talked as friends for a bit, but soon the heat turned up again and I found myself back in the same boat...ugh! I know, bad decision...🤷 I thought maybe things would be better because he knew I had the capability to walk away...Wrong! He actually pulled away even further and attempted to make it strictly sexual...hint, hint...all the while, I was catching feelings because we'd have some serious talks about serious stuff in-between...Well, I'm at the point where I'm asking myself, what are you doing? This is not me at all! I'm changing who I am to make him happy, why??? So now, once again I told him this is not what I'm looking for, and again cancelled the trip! Crazy, right?? His answer, "you'll be back, I'll wait!"...This time he's in for a rude awakening! My mind is made up that this is just wasting my time, and I'm denying myself the opportunity to meet a man I deserve...And I have to tell you that taking your power back in these types of relationships is very empowering! 👏👍

My x husband wants me back , but he doesn't want to be seen with me or spend anytime with me...but he expects me to keep doing for him ...i live alone and I don't live the life style he does ...please help me , don't judge me ok

These videos are sooo helpful to me. My dream is to be a Psychologist one day and I'm currently working hard toward that dream. When it's my friends or my family when it comes to advice I'm really good and I can tell when someone is crushing on someone. But when it's happening to me personally it's like I become completely blind to it all. I spose it's only natural though, it's easier looking from an outsiders perspective. These videos help me out! So thank you.

Been on 3 dates with a guy from a dating app, we don't text all that much, but we chat a fair bit when face to face & seem to click really well. Was wondering if it matters not texting much

The funniest excuse I’ve heard: a friend of his other friend died of covid and so he would be busy the whole weekend. Share yours guys, I need a good laugh 😆

I just love Ryan!!! listen and understand to everything he has to guide!! BTW Ryan, I sent u a wisio request too, I need your help :) Thanks again for being so accessible for guidance!!

Never dating again

Sorry I didn't reply to your text...I've been hella busy...yeh right!

I look at so many of your videos that a few days ago I had dreams about dating someone and you showed up lol 😅

I was listening and realized you’re describing me 😬

He told me in the beginning. If l gave him 1 chance he wont fail or hell try so hard NOT to fail. I'm important to him. He says because I'm his woman l deserve diamonds and gold! not cheap jewelry some of my exs gave me. He wants me to live with him when he moves down closer to me. He wants me to always go to him for my probs etc. Noone else but l just dont wanna bother him at work. Everytime l try pulling away or not talk to him he gets worried. He says he wants me safe and not hurt. my familia says move on or try too. Since the incident that happen on Thanksgiving. When l try to talk like a friend to him no when l change his name from HubbyHoneyBear to his actual name. I do that when he makes me mad or sad or when I'm disappointed in him. He tries to cheer me up and make it up to me when he visits. The being single on fb worries me a bit... but I'm thinking if hes doing something then hes like l always feared but then again... im not really his gf/wife because we far away and said 1 we dont want ldr and we both said we dont like ldr sry. I told him one time l think im wasting my breath and time on you. And you lie about stuff chilling with me having so called presents for me. I'm tired of it then he said we both could easily find other people to date if we wanted too but he tells me he doesnt he rather have me in his life forever and for me to plz be patient that he loves me. so l just left it at that... then we go back to normal talking at LEAST 1 a day. Which is fine than not at all lm thinking but my guy friends say if I'm 1st priority l would be 1st above all and my friend I'm liking that's in a ldr with me told me I'm busy I'm sry lll try to make time for my wifey your right mimi l should put you as top priority I'll try. And when l told him l dont like liars he tells me he dont like liars and ok I'll do that l wont lie to my wife I'll tell her everything I'll do whatever my mimi wants long as she happy. I'm working and trying to get you everything and the world.

Ryan, can you make a video on where to meet new guys? (I apologize in advance if you’ve already made a video like this) I need more options!!! And yes, I already tried online dating and I don’t want to do it again😭😭

I am a bit unsure with a guy who I have been seeing for 3 months, known for 5. I have spent alot of time with him, his kids, even met his Mom at his son's birthday. He lives an hour away and everything is great when we are together, but the problem is we don't see eachother alot. He does all of the driving out to me which is awesome because I have an old car, but he is busy alot and I try to be understanding. He has made it to alot of my important events and enjoys them not just for me. However there are days that go by without him texting me and weeks that go by without seeing him. He told me in the beginning how busy he gets during this season for work plus his 2 kids and their baseball practices. I just wish he would call or text more and sometimes I wonder if he is wasting my time-until he calls again.

First comment, ❤️

My fwb of 2 months told me he's not ready for a relationship which is fine, I'm all good with that but the other night I introduced him to a friend of mine and they ended up a fair bit drunk (I only had a couple drinks) and she was all over him really bad and was telling him that I'm in love with him like she was purposely trying to sabotage my relationship with him so she could get with him. I ended up snapping at her and she was trying to fob it off as being too drunk when I hit her up about it the next day. She said I totally overreacted to the whole thing, and now he doesn't want to be fwb anymore 😔 Any advice?

He told me that he was in fact a broken heart just AFTER sex...🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️😔

A capricorn just texts for booty calls. Then wants to go our separate ways but then texts me again month or so later. But I wouldn't go see him the next two times he wanted to see me. Says he likes me and hr just doesn't know. Then I dud give in couple mo later but he never calls during week. Then I would break it off again then he would text me again . Dojng t his off and on for months. It's hard not to stay away because of the connection we have always had from day 1 and the sexual attraction. It's hard to completely let go emotionally even though I know its not good for me. Very confused 😕

Please break down about friends 1st b4 being romantically involved like strictly mates??Generally I would get 2 know someone through dates (romance with intention) & talking etc within a 2 month + window before sex or commitment made. In this day an age it’s tricky as people would either just leave you in the friend zone or will be seeing multiple people and possible sexually engaging with them. It may work with a 40+ man and mature not sure about young men especially western men.

I Feel like an idiot with your vidéo.. you are so perfectly right...I tried despite red flags and my gut...and now i cry ! I feel so stupid...gosh...it is ami my fault Thank you so much Wish you the best From Paris with ❤

Was told " I live with an ex friend" but she wants more...

This post couldn't be more poignant. Thank you Ryan! Direct male quote from this week ( context, I've been seeing him for almost a year. This is his response to me saying I feel like we're in a long distance relationship in the same city ) : "I don't honestly know how to fix that feeling with the boundaries we have and both of us working full-time job schedule. Plus, winter. Open for suggestions, though "

He would only text and flaked on first date. Kept texting good morning every morning but also saying he was busy when I asked to see him. Never taking it to the next level. Always giving hope that something would eventually happen. If not interested just say so and stop texting. Thanks Ryan.

Ryan what does it mean when your ex starts talking to you again. today my ex Justin decided to start talking too me again.

Started off good but 6 weeks in..I believe its called breadcrumbing, he just got distant ignored some texts but would still respond to others as if nothing wrong. semi agree to see me then I'd hear nothing. The end, I gave up trying which I guess is what he wanted. Got him off hook with actually saying it to my face..

I’m so glad I subbed to you! Your awesome!

When a middle aged man tells you after 10 dates, calls, daily texting and so on that he was "emotionally lazy" and he has got "a protective blanket". Why he even started meeting me when clearly he was not emotionally available. Oh..and all the promises how we will do this or that but we never did. He even didn't tell me straight way that he got 5 children. I found out months later...Half-truths, keeping conversations superficial, vague behaviour, not returning my compliments, never mentioning how he felt or not about me, twice he said that he valued my friendship. Plus the regular excuses how busy he was. A month ago I texted him that i was tired of being strung along...never replied back. I tried to call him few times he picked the phone once only and told me he would call me back...never happened. Being chronically late and few times even did not bother to let me know. Then when I expressed my disappointment he said sorry and then he told me that if I was late he would not have made a fuss of it....

Everything was great , 2 months if dating ..talking almost everyday,texting throughout the day,all preachy, we were on the phone having a casual conversation, he said mom is calling he will call me back later aaaaaaand he went missing ... didn't respond to me and once he did all said was that's he's busy .. well you can only imagine how I felt ... And I guess I will never find out what happened,

Hey Ryan, I love your channel so much. Thank you for helping so many women and for giving us hope! Your amazing and funny advice helps me gain clarity about men. I just have a question that I need more clarity on. Where can I contact you? Thanks so much!

Once I notice a man is wasting a time I just block block blocky block block

If your pictures aren’t on his Facebook page, is that a sign?

If a guy doesn't seem bothered by other guys hitting on you. Major red flag

I meet someone in this yr.He said he in love with me,but when I asking him to go to just meet his parents he said to fast to do so?? Can I run or see what is about first?

EVERYTHING YOU SAID....happend to me with him long distance rs over 8 years.....he never came to me I always went to him etc

He would say things but no action, He never wanted to meet up (we did eventually) but he would blame the “pandemic “ say that he’s afraid of getting sick. in my mind id say “but if id have sex with him hed be here in 5 mins” 🙄 we went on a hike and he asked about how in felt about kissing during a pandemic. So I took it as “oh hes interested in kissing me...” So I took my mask off , moved close to him , and he flinched at me... That was the worst feeling ive ever felt. I felt like I was a cockroach or vomit. weve been masked off before so it wasnt the first time we saw face to face. we were getting to know eachother and it lasted 6 months but I was so happy I never slept with him.

honestly, i broke it off in january and this video was impossibly validating. this was the "weird" feeling i couldn't quite place

I love how funny you are 😝💗💗💗

If it were easy to find your person then is he really your person? Everything worth it takes work and all he is explaining is even in the beginning there’s some effort on both sides.

You know what. I’ve been watching these types of videos for a little while now and it’s made me realise I’m better off just being on my own. Men are soo manipulative and I just have the time or interest in trying to work them out anymore. I’m done! My life is good without one actually except o have to cut the grass myself but I manage fine. They usually expect something in return anyway. I genuinely just don’t like them anymore

Ryan Patrick where are you?! Why aren't you posting anymore? :(

But how do I know if he’s no. 2, a serial honeymooner?

Well this guy which I’m still talking to hoping to maybe fix things told me we needed space and that we were both going through a lot and I needed to focus on myself as did he we went through this for months then he decided to search other options for a bit and now he’s back hoping to fix things between us and get back together idk part of me is confused all together and doesn’t know if he actually wants me