Is it safer to be single? 

Love your channel! Thanks for posting the content that you do, because I think it's necessary now more than ever. With that being said (and I know there are women out there who would wholly disagree with me), as much as I think it's necessary to have content creators and bloggers who are giving solid advice to heterosexual women about vetting men, teaching women how to stand on their boundaries/standards, showing women what healthy relationships look like, etc, I really REALLY think we need to start telling women the harsh reality, which is that not all of us are going to have a "forever person" and have lifelong romantic partnerships. I think we need to start encouraging women to see voluntary singlehood as a viable lifestyle option and not as a "last resort" having spending years and years straining themselves mentally, physically and emotionally trying to find ONE man they can deal with day in and day out. We're socially conditioned to see singlehood as this disease for which the only cure is monogamy, or we treat it as automatically being on the losing team. Or like it's just supposed to be this occasional, temporary rest stop on the highway to life. While there are still some "good guys" out there, they are few and far between, and there's not enough of them to go around for all of us to get lucky. I think a lot of Black women especially are going to have to emancipate themselves from needed to be "picked". I'm tired of seeing my sisters out here being disappointed, disrespected and having their peace violated by what is definitely a community of unhealed, broken men. Sometimes choosing better means choosing ourselves and I think we need to be embracing that more, because these men out here REALLY don't care.

This situation, and others, have convinced me that a woman not being in an abusive romantic relationship seems to be more a matter of luck, circumstances, or chance than anything else. Even if you try and vet a potential partner and “choose better,” that doesn’t guarantee anything. 😩

No it’s safer for BW to stop dating bm.

You don't have to stay single, you can open up your options and date outside of your race. I always say that dating a black male is dangerous for black women.

Yep this is why I am staying single. I am a BLK woman also and men are dangerous...looking at pregnant black women mortality rates and mortality DV rates of BW in relationships or marriage with BM or men in general.

it always makes me laugh whenever a man says i'll be alone and sad in response to me talking about how i won't do xyz because they're telling on themselves really like i'll talk about how i won't settle for a man less than something and here they (the men that i'd have to settle for to be in a relationship with) come telling me 'i'll be miserable' because i'd rather be single than be with someone who's okayish

Love yourvchannel. I'm a Caucasian woman; I guess I should call myself white, I just hate the term. I am way more comfortable listening to the channels of women of color and other marginalized groups because I find them so authentic and real. Am middle-aged, a single parent, divorced from a partner that mentally, emotionally,and verbally abused me. While no overt physical violence while I was pregnant, a lot of verbal abuse and cruelty. My only child is profoundly autistic and not able to care for himself. He lives in a 24/7 care facility and will be his whole life. Marriage didn't make life better, it was a pure hellscape. Women of color have always been the backbone of their culture, doing most of the chid rearing on their own. And pregnant women are more vulnerable than at any other time in their lives. It's incredible to me that people would bash Keke into marrying for what? Hearing her story, should be regarded by support from others not judgement or contempt. The man is violent and abusive. To suggest the mother marry someone who is violent just because of image is incredible. I hope she is okay and safe. This channel is absolutely correct. We should not be normalizing marriage of an abusive partner to his partner just because she is pregnant. Her safety and the safety of her child should be number one concern. Marriage helps men, not women. Statistically, men live longervand happier lives when married, not married women. I may not be a woman of color, but I am a woman, and I put my gender first over my skin color, and this channel is on point. Women of all groups should have the back of the sisterhood above all else. Menfolk want women to believe that being alone is the worst outcome. Well, I'm alone, divorced, and had to rear my immediate family on my own,and marriage didn't help me one bit. It's a lie, a fairytale used to convince women that marriage is more important than their safety and safety of their chidren. I hope Keke is safe and does what is best for her and her child. Marriage doesn't equal happiness or even safety. The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. He demonstrated violence. That just suggests he will likely be violent in future. We all make mistakes and she is human. I just wish her happiness, safe, and has a healthy child and outcome.

So glad that I found your channel. I’m currently healing from a lot of abuse inflicted by men, and your videos have been informative and extremely interesting. The content you’re creating is needed for a lot of women out here! You have a new subscriber 🙌🏽

another great video, glad i came across your channel, they're all spot on...the issue is that with most of the population, there is a strong tunnel vision. i can notice certain subliminal actions like passive aggressive door slamming, verbal interactions where a person is trying to tell you what to do or control your actions/decisions/choices but cover it up by making it seem as what they're simply giving you a suggestion or advice, and then doing obvious things like misplacing/hiding stuff, tampering with equipment so they won't work properly, and etc etc just to make it seem as if all mishaps are an just a natural occurrence...i'm anti-social mostly, and an introvert, and i've personally seen women date men with these traits but could not see thru the joyful, and friendly mask they portrayed while i could spot them out at first glance.. that's the downside of being an open person as society pressures us all to be is that it leads to vulnerability.. a quiet individual who sits back, and actually observes people thru their mask will quickly find out that most are putting on an act, and when the mask begins the fade, all goes down from there..that's why i say, Mr. right could end up Mr. wrong within just a matter of months.

Of course I'm not surprised at the men piping up in an effort to support her ex and trash Keke. What I am surprised and saddened by are the amount of women in 2023 that STILL place blame on Keke for her abuse. It's giving "You chose this so... what did you expect/ you ignored the red flags so this is what you get". This to me is a hop, skip and a jump from the "You wore a short skirt and were drunk so of course its and invitation to be SA'ed. Thats so wild to me. WOMEN SHOULD NOT BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR MEN'S VIOLENCE TOWARD THEM REGARDLESS OF THE CIRCUMSTANCES. Don't get me wrong... its also heartbreaking to see a woman caught up in a relationship with a dude who is trash and way below her level, but all you can do is hope that she wakes up and gets it together. Netizens were telling her she should leave or he is trash and to walk away... maybe even friends and family were saying the same... who knows. Ultimately, thats a decision that has to come from the woman herself to leave and no amount of "shaming" is productive in this regard. Like forreal where is peoples mf humanity and empathy at? Everyone doesn't have the same mental strength/fortitude when it comes to things like this and I really wish we would stop expecting people to behave and make choices the way we personally would. The "Shii... if it were me..." crowd need to fall back and take a seat. It isn't you... so hush.

I love your channel and content❤❤

Its always better for us to stay single. Honestly, its best to be ugly and single. Lol but seriously, you'll stay off of the dusty radar that way. I purposely dress down most of the time so they leave me alone. If I do put on something other than tights and a t-shirt, I make sure that I have gas in my car already and won't really be anywhere alone. It sucks but we really have to prepare ourselves and think 10 steps ahead just to go out into the world with men.

Marriage is a safer route with lower abandonment rates. It is what it is

Great question

Good video. You have a new subscriber.

New subscriber