THIS MAN ISNT STANDING UP FOR HIMSELF. TAKE THE 3 YR OLD CHIKD AND LEAVE THE B. THE FORST MOVE WOULD HAVE BEEN TO TELL THE MAN NEXT DOOR TO NOT COME OVER WHEN HE IS AT WORK AND GYM.
I could have forgiven my cheating ex husband easily, but him trying to mentally break me by gaslighting was just pure evil. He was in the wrong and he made me feel like the crazy one. I feel for this dude.
I think she just as such a low view of her husband that she honestly doesn't think he will leave her or do anything. She has zero respect for him. Perhaps she is pushing things to see how weak her husband is and far she can push things before he'll do anything.
@@texan903 Everybody cheats somehow. This woman is just a critical case, but everybody does and there's a reason why. It takes less effort to just cheat to feel good for a while than starting over from scratch for a chance to find a good partner that makes you feel good for a while.
Not so easy. If Joe divorces his wife, the court will award her the house, full custody of their child, he`ll be stung for alimony, child support and only given visitation rights to his child on his wife`s terms, regardless whether she`s a cheater or not. Every which way Joe loses. I know this happened to me. Guys, stay single.
I know, I thought that too... it was just a feeding thought, and I dismissed it right away... but going through the comments and seeing some like yours... I feel kinda validated in that I'm not the only one going there in my head. This hurts me... just thinking about it makes me emotional. IF this turns out not to be his kid... this kid's life is going to be even more confusing, filled with pain and grief, and so many negative feelings and experiences, than it already is. And this man's heart is going to be shattered for life... how do you come back from something like this? I'm not very familiar with the laws in the US, but I'd imagine that he then would be VERY hesitant regarding the divorce because she now has the kid all to herself, which is the best leverage one can have. I get physically sick just thinking about it. Btw... I hope you're having a great day, and that you're doing great. Take care 🙏🏻
@@LyYAHNyou really don’t get over it. Not that easily. And you’re right, both his and the child’s life would be wrecked. So would the neighbors wife, assuming he has one. They’re both ruining both families. And if it does come back that this child is in fact the neighbors, that’s going to ruin things even more. And here in the US he’d have the legal right to divorce her. I’d hate to think what the judge would say about how the kid is treated.
He needs to put a stop to his neighbor involving himself and his childs life. I don't trust anybody having that much to do with my child think about that.. Grooming is real
It’s actually not a difficult to explain why a woman would behave this way. It’s studied and talked about routinely in men’s spaces - and not referring to a take from Andrew Tate. I know he says stuff like this, but his delivery is too annoying to capture my attention. But, aside from some outliers like myself, the only people that actually want to accept the truth are men that have been torn apart by women like this. And even then, some of these brutally tormented men still can’t accept the reality of modern women because of how plugged-in they are to the comforting lies of modern society. It’s sad
@Matt-tt4cu that's not a "modern" woman. That's a bad person like there are bad men aswell. Please stop listening to stupid wannabe man like Tate. I'm a "modern" woman and I would never do this to my husband. Being modern doesn't mean being a s..t. It means we have the same rights. Can work and have dignity nothing more or less. I don't need to be controlled by a man by violence nether by money. I would do anything for my husband as long he's great to me and vice versa. If love doesn't go away and there is no compatibility (what shouldn't dispear suddenly) there is no reason for separation. But if there would be lying or cheating, I would definitely run for the hills.
@@Matt-tt4cu @Matt-tt4cu that's not a "modern" woman. That's a bad person like there are bad men aswell. Please stop listening to stupid wannabe man like Tate. I'm a "modern" woman and I would never do this to my husband. Being modern doesn't mean being a s..t. It means we have the same rights. Can work and have dignity nothing more or less. I don't need to be controlled by a man by violence nether by money. I would do anything for my husband unless he's great to me and vice versa.
@@Matt-tt4cuI’ve experienced a past girlfriend who was just like this woman. I’m now married to a woman who is the polar opposite. So it’s not universal behavior amongst women. But it’s common enough to be a serious problem men need to be vigilant of when getting into relationships.
Get a paternity test. Divorce her. Try and get full custody if the child is yours. Move. Focus on self improvement (education/additional training, getting in shape, new hobby etc). Living well is the best revenge.
@@elenigros "Infidelity and child custody have nothing to do with each other." - It absolutely does. In some states, if you establish you are not the paternal father you have no financial obligation. A married mother who cheats should absolutely have paternity established. Not only for the financial obligations, but also for potential medical issues that might require an organ transplant.
If she's gaslighting you, and a psych could confirm that, you are the better parent. Make sure you do everything you can to ensure that you get custody. See a lawyer and get this counseling immediately.
Exactly, he needs to understand a good mom doesn’t cheat let alone cheat in front of her child. My husband had a mom like this, she brought men around him while his dad was at work from as early as he could remember. This crap messes a kid up.
Yes, she’s a terrible mom. I know several people that their mother or father would bring around the lovers. It messes with the child seeing this. It makes the child feel guilty and they never get over it. He needs to get a divorce and move on with his son. Not healthy for the son or him.
Blunt would be: your wife doesn’t respect you, man up, and protect yourself. She hates you and the law is going to take everything from you. Get mad and get ready to fight for your kids, because your slut wife is protected by the law even though it was her that broke up the marriage.
Yeah, to be warned away directly from the husband, and still insinuate yourself in their house and have contact with the child? That's either someone with deep issues and mental problems, she's encouraging him to behave like a lunatic, or there's something afoot.
DNA test is required. I think if he files for divorce she may pull her trump card of paternity. She is not going to file because she has it all. A guy to finance her, while having a lover 8 hrs a day.
@@elettramia6380 the wife allowed it, not him. The wife should’ve blocked it altogether from the beginning. She’s the one in the marriage with the husband, not the other guy.
I can do that one better. My husband (I had figured it out and separated) would take our daughter with him on work getaways. He'd told his coworkers that his gf was his wife and our daughter's mother (he'd started a new job in another state and moved the gf with him). When our daughter would go in these getaways to "destinations", he instructed her to pretend the gf was her mother!!!
@@JacqueMiller-w1y This is a very astute observation. For all the wife's obvious crimes against their marriage, he obviously didn't have the self respect to stand up for himself, and thus invites this behaviour from her and their neighbour (not blaming the husband at all though).
@@AllisoninspirationsIt depends on the state. While most states have no fault divorce. There are still states that have at fault reasons for divorce. This means you can leave the marriage at any point for any reason, but the distribution of assets change if there is an at-fault reason. Honestly I think all states need to do this.
@@paulaqueiroszthat’s how it should be everywhere but America’s court system with divorces and children are skewed and favor the women to the fullest 99% of the time.
Lawyer --> Paternity Test --> Divorce --> Therapy regarding the relationship and for his low self-esteem/conflict avoidance. They're both daring him to make a move and laughing at him when he doesn't.
Holy moly the anxiety is real, this poor guy needs to catch a break before he has a heart attack. He just can’t get away, poor dude. I really feel for that.
I'm not blaming him, but he can definitely get away. He just chooses not to leave. He's been confronting her every day for a long time with not following through. Of course she'd continue. Yes, divorce is horrible for men when it comes to divorce court, child support and possible alimony but it'd be worth it for sanity. Plus, the longer he's with her the more nonsense she'll create.
The deep breathing from the caller off the gate is so real. That's how it feels when you know you have no reason to be there but you're just holding onto hope.
I agree, he’s evil, but as a woman, it tells me his wife is likely telling the neighbor all sorts of terrible things about the caller to justify the cheating. The neighbor probably feels like he’s doing a duty to her and the child by being present and bringing the kid gifts. I have never know a woman to do such a terrible thing and not try to justify it by making the other person out to be the bad guy.
@user-qp2qe5gf9b doesn't matter what a woman tells him, it snot his place to feel any sort of way about it, at the end of the day he's simply screwing that guys wife and that's about as deep as this needs to get.
@zachwear3217 because every kid deserves love. Be mad at the wife, not the kid. The kid just needs love. I get being mad but taking it out on a kid who has no say in the matter, and had nothing to do with the decision to cheat.
His wife's behavior is outrageous. He absolutely needs to divorce her asap. There are other women out there that will appreciate a man like him and not cheat.
Women today don’t appreciate men and likely never have. They appreciate what men do. They’re not the same. That’s why wasting time on them is dangerous. Men are capable of romantic love. I’m not so sure the other half is.
This honestly sounds like an Adam Sandler comedy . So ridiculous and irreverent. Waving to him? I could see his son calling the neighbor dad or the neighbor wearing his clothes in front of him. The wife emasculates him and he allows it. He needs to start standing up for himself. It's sad
It's situational as both have pros and cons. More peace, freedom, & money(?) being single but there's loneliness. Arguments/fights in a relationship & wanting space you can't always get, but there's way less loneliness and someone to do fun stuff with intimately. Being single can be way better than being with the wrong person or being in a relationship can be way better with the right person. It's all situational and both can change on any given day.
Being in a relationship with the wrong person absolutely yes. Being with the right person, defently not. It depends and setting boundaries and in this case move away or asked for divorce. Otherwise I don't see light...
They are 100% sleeping together and she will leave him for the neighbor eventually. I hope he gets a dna test and put up cameras in his house. Poor guy..
She gets the best of both worlds right now. That changes the minute this guy gets it together and gets the divorce. I wouldn't be surprise if she gets neither guy when that happens.
@@cynthiaborden4209proof, helps with court cases and maybe can get custody, assuming it’s his kid, but I think it helps with divorce if u have proof of cheating
Poor guy. Sounds like a chronic people pleaser who never learnt to respect himself and set boundaries, which is why he's being walked all over. I sympathise with him, as I've had to overcome that myself. Beneath "trying to do the nice thing" is rage, grief, and fear. May God bless him with the peace, love, and freedom he deserves,
Poor guy, there is nothing worse then being cheated on - it's a terrible betrayal and those who do it lack character. She gaslighted him - cheaters ALWAYS turn it around on the victim and blame them. He needs to stop defending this monster of a woman.
Bs. Have you ever loved someone, and that person neglects and abuses you sexually, emotionally, physically, with no attention and no intimacy. You cheat when you are fed up. The cheater becomes the bad guy?
Somebody is f*cking up somewhere in a relationship that causes the other person to cheat. The cheater cheats because he or she is sick and tired of the bs they have to deal with year after year. Have you thought about that?
@@mikeinmelbourne9491 So fkn selfish… it’s one thing to cheat in general when you’re in a relationship, but when there’s kid involved, I feel like it’s amplified x1000 on the disgust scale Kids ALWAYS, ALWAYS find out whats in their parent’s closet when they’re older.. they will 100% find out about this affair one day and that the reason the family isn’t together is because their Mom loved their neighbour more than her family… it’s absolutely soul crushing for everyone involved. F this woman.
Dude if you’re reading this. I’m sorry. I can’t imagine the pain you’re feeling, just thinking about your story makes my chest hurt for you. I hope you know better times are ahead for you. Make the tough decisions it’ll get better! You know what you gotta do.
So sad but yeah true. If that’s the case they should just divorce. Lets say even if they move to a different location, she will probably do it again with a diff neighbor or worse still continue with the previous neighbor. It’s just a sad situation. Sigh poor dude. Hope he finds his peace. For him and his kid.
Joe you are worth more than that. Things Will get better. Hard to believe but the good guy always ends up better off when the dust settles. Been there.
Perfect marriages or relationships aren't real; each one is different. What makes one person content might not make another person content. But I've discovered that there's always a solution to every problem. Five years ago, my wife and I were facing divorce because of issues in our marriage, but we managed to resolve them. It was challenging, but we made it through.
I genuinely want to be happy as well. I'm in a relationship, and even though we're apart, I can't think of life without her; my love for her is solid. I really want her back, and I'm committed to making it work. We've tried different things, like therapy, to mend things.
Learning to let someone you love go is always a tough journey, but in my case, I had the wisdom of a spiritual mentor who kept my marriage from crumbling. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
I'll swiftly look her up online. Thanks. I'm hopeful that following this course of action will bring about positive changes for me too; her absence is deeply felt.
Dr. John said his wife is practically rubbing his nose in her affair. She’s not the only one. Sounds like this “neighbor” is essentially daring Joe to step up to him and Joe seems to be on the edge of doing something ill advised. He needs to leave before someone ends up in jail, the hospital or the morgue.
I want you to know I’ve been taking pointers from you. Especially how you say sorry and show compassion in the way the person needs. I do this so I can help as many as I can, and you’re helping me to do that
@@gvintage Why should he get custody of his kid while working night shifts. This is not the way it goes. These are separate topics. And all of us don't know what's behind.
@@user-if4ke6en9r We don't know that. Custody is a legal issue. You cannot say: I never saw my son, haven't been to any of his events, but want full custody, because my neighbor took this role for over a year
Do it even if it’s is a no fault state. Give all the gathered evidence to every friend and every family member. Control the narrative and shame her in every way possible.
If that emotional affair has been going on for a year, they've passed that. Its a sexual affair now. They're lying. This husband needs to get away from that situation, somebody is going to snap and wind up in a serious situation. She's not going to be the one to end it. She wants him too, so she can justify "setting up house" with that other guy. Her having the affair, and her putting her husband thru this emotional mess is a 🍆 move. I feel bad for him
This poor man is still in denial. He keeps downplaying his wife’s actions during the call. He’s hurting bad and doesn’t know what to do. That sucks! Please move on man! This is terrible.
I am a woman. I did meet up with friends (single) from the opposite s*x sometimes for a late night cooking, chat etc. Mainly because of our work schedule or living arrangement or any other various reasons it had to be a late evening thing. I am not against that in any shape or form. But, also, I am a friend with a couple. The husband and I worked at the same job. And I never ever called the husband unless it was work related and it was during our shift (he was the shift leader so I reported to him) . Every personal call went to and through the wife (we're good friends) without exception. Every time I went over to their place it happened when the wife was there. Never occurred to me to go over there when only the husband was there even though we were friends and also work mates at one point. I just felt it would be disrespectful towards the wife. She and I met up a lot for a coffee, a chat, walking the dog etc. Every time they invited me over the wife called me to ask. The husband is a chef so he cooked good meals but he never called me to invite over. It was always up to the wife to make the call. And I always felt this is the respectful way to do it. I always felt that when you are managing your relationship with a couple you just have to do it slightly differently from when you are dealing with a single person. There are protocols in place for a reason and you got to keep them especially if its a couple, I think. And it works out quite well. They moved away to another country a year ago. I just had a nice long chat with the wife over the phone 🙂We are still good friends. I might be able to visit them next summer 🤞
People in a relationship should NEVER have friends or spend time with people of the opposite gender, period. It’s not controlling, it’s protecting the relationship. My current GF knows this, and she understands that I’m not telling her she can’t, I just choose to not be in a relationship with her if she does. My females know and understand that if I’m in a relationship,they won’t be hearing from me.
@@barryc9115 Lol no, that absolutely is controlling. If you have faith in your partner and are secure in your relationship you wouldn't need to worry about your spouse/partners behavior around the opposite gender, especially if it's someone that's been in their life for a long time. Why are you so afraid of plutonic relationships outside of your own?
@@ey3z4yalisten friend, my wife was with me while I was just a lad in the army, and we got married straight after high-school at 19 years old. We are still married to this day. You women really need to give up with this whole plutonic nonsense. You just admitted that you won’t be over there when his wife isn’t there. Meaning you can’t break certain barriers that lead to becoming deeper friends with him. Men are not able to live in plutonic spaces as well as women. Men can’t just get vulnerable with women without certain hormones being activated. You women best to start accepting that for your own mental health sake. Men are starting to leave ya’ll alone now due to this ignorance. If yo man say no guy friends you either with it or you not. But don’t make men seem evil because you’re ok with being vulnerable and open to human contact from the most dangerous yet unpredictable animal on the planet known as man.
Joe you have a heart made of gold. Any person who cheats once will always be easier for them to cheat again. You cannot trust her anymore, not with your marriage. Your life won't be over when you get divorced. You deserve so much better. Get a divorce, sell the house, take care of your kid in a rental until you can afford another house
I don’t think leaving the house for a month is going to quell his anxiety. All he’s going to be thinking about is his wife and his neighbor having a complete free for all while he’s away. Torture either way though…
A dear friend who passed away 4 years ago once told me, in life only people can cause you major problems, they can make your life a living hell. And to this day I`ve not been able to prove him wrong. Not mentioned, is this neighbour married?
Once a man confronts another man on his wife subject, a decent man will never bother that family again. A wife respecting husband's feeling will not talk to that person again. A relation without respect and trust is already dead.
I used to hook up with a married female coworker. Her husband found out two years after it ended and he confronted me. I ended up hooking up with her a few more times.
5 or 6 years ago I worked with my ex girlfriend and while we were together I watched her and this guy I used to consider a friend spend a lot of time together each day and they were always messaging and very flirty with eachother. She went to his house and hungout with him for over 12 hours one day. Before they were this friendly I told her that he was into her and she dismissed it but then months after I was doing my own thing and kind of checked out of the relationship she had told me that he did admit to her that he had feelings for her. I remember the feeling of seeing that everyday and crying at my desk. I have so much sympathy for people going through their partner's infidelity, physical or emotional. It becomes hard to trust again when you are being lied to constantly.
Caller, the best revenge and healing is walking away. Even if your wife says she won’t go talk to the neighbor….you’ll always be paranoid and anxious. It hurts but you’ll regret staying. This woman is evil and I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
This poor man deserves so much better. Bro if you see this, I know you love her, she’s the mother of your child. But she’s not the one. Her rejection of you doesn’t say anything about your worth, it says that she has no class or understanding of what a loving husband is. And her and that neighbor *won’t* make it in the long run. Affairs never do
Unless you file your own divorce papers. You can get those at the law library. Or you can easily get them on computer, but make sure they fit your state.
He needs to confront the man. You have to stand up for the disrespect he is showing you. The level of disrespect the neighbor and wife are showing is incredible
