Jordan Peterson: How To Deal With Depression | Powerful Motivational Speech 

Psilocybin saved my life. I was addicted to heroin for 15 years and after Psilocybin treatment I will be 3 years clean in September. I have zero cravings. This is something that truly needs to be more broadly used in addiction treatment.

One of the worst parts of depression is when you’re thinking about all the things you could have been doing and could have done that you wanted to, if you didn’t feel the way that you do. You’re sitting in the passenger seat of your own life

Depression can also be something positive - a way your mind has of telling you to change your lifestyle or get rid of the toxic people from your life. Listen to your depression. Sort through things and figure out what you need to do. Get moving. Your mind wants to give you peace.

To all those watching this video for their mental health, in case no one tells you today, just know you’re not alone (a lot of us are here for the same reasons) and you’re doing an amazing job getting on top of your mental health. And you should be proud of yourself for doing so. I hope you have an amazing day, and know we’re all here with you :)

He gets a bad rep for being "right wing", but if you pay attention to what he's saying and not what people are saying about him you realize he's not political. Not in the sense of Left or Right wing politics. If anything he's a realist and a logical thinker. I guess common sense may seem conservative. I consider myself liberal minded and I really like his views on life.

"Are you as educated as you are intelligent?" just legit blew my mind.

For those of us that can't afford to see a therapist Dr Peterson is a gift from the great universe ✨

It's actually miraculous to see someone who puts so much energy into caring about the well being of strangers. He's not trying to sell anything or win an argument. He is passionately pleading with us to take care of ourselves and explaining the ways to succeed at that.

If this man was my professor I would have never dropped out of college.

I applied for a job today. It was hard but i pressed "send". Whew.

We must protect this man at all costs. He's been a huge resource in my life as of late.

Dr. Peterson has helped me from being a suicidal mess to embracing life and stepping up and dealing with my issues. Thanks doc❤

I am so glad I learned English!

This students have no idea how lucky they are to have someone like him

I can listen to Jordan Peterson all day long...such logic, such knowledge

I remember when I was severely depressed and first stumbled upon Jordan Peterson. The man planted a thought in me, "Can I actually live a good life? Can I actually be happy?". I found out it was possible. The reason I now start the day with a smile, looking forward to everything is because of this man. God bless him.

" we're all in the same game, just different levels Dealing with the same hell , just different devils ,,..

Imagine where humanity would be if all educators were like him..

For those of you out there battling demons alone, you are so strong for that and your life will amount to so much beauty one day and you will be stronger than ever. Your worth so much more than you feel in the moment, God bless you and your family 💜

He gave everything to us. And life almost did him in because his strength was given to us. Shame on those who seek to destroy him and his family.

I love how he just casually says "everyone's life is a tragedy". Also, his account of how depressed people reason from one small setback to a completely bleak outlook is spot on. I've been doing it for years.

“No ones life is fine. Everyone’s life is a tragedy”. Well said.

I think for me the worst part of depression is the people around you don't want to be around you when you're in those depressive states. Which is understandable but it seems to make everything worse when you feel bad and know the people you love the most don't enjoy being around you. Nobody wants to be sad but people treat you like it's a choice you're making. It's so lonely inside our minds.

Lost my job, my savings, my house, my wife (now ex) had an affair, I broke and had an affair, divorced, and am now putting myself back together. It’s hard.

I went to a training once that was really intense. The days were long. Day one and Day two were one lecture after the other with very short breaks. At the beginning the moderator told us that we were all adults and needed to be responsible for taking care of ourselves. If the seats are too hard, go get a pillow. If you're chilly, go get a sweater. If your legs are getting stiff from sitting so long, go and walk around at the back of the room for a while. If you're thirsty, go get a drink. Do whatever it is you need to get yourself though this. She closed out with, "Suffering is inevitable, but misery is optional." That stuck with me.

This man will go down as one of the greatest minds of the last 100 years atleast.

2021 was the hardest, darkest time of my life. I was physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually BROKEN. But now I feel genuinely GRATEFUL and BLESSED that I had to go through that phase because GOD has graciously REVEALED Himself to me in miraculous ways. I am fortunate that He allowed me to know Him at a very young age, but this year is so much SPECIAL because of what WE (yes, GOD and me) have been through last year. He showed me how POWERFUL prayers truly are when I started to focus on WHO HE IS rather than who I am, on WHAT HE CAN DO rather than what I deserve. The experience was MAGICAL. He showed up BIG TIME and assured me that HE is indeed a LISTENING and RESPONDING GOD. Oh how my faith has skyrocketed as a result! Now more than ever, I have very bright HOPE for my future because I experienced first hand how RELIABLE God is. And for that I will forever be grateful. GLORY BE TO GOD, MY EVER FAITHFUL FATHER. ♥️♥️♥️ To everyone who's struggling right now, please know that JESUS LOVES YOU. HE DIED FOR YOU. He wants to help you and give you peace. Please surrender your burdens to Him and allow Him to move in your life. "Because he loves Me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges My Name. He will call on Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him." (Psalm 9<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="74">1:14</a>-15) Please hold on to this bible verse because WHATEVER GOD SAYS, HE FULFILLS. ✝️

The fact that anyone would try to disparage this guy as a mean hateful person is so upsetting to me. He's helped millions of people. I have both of his books and he's really helped with my depression in real tangible ways. I can unequivocally say this man has helped at the very least 1 person from committing suicide - we should be cherishing him for what he brings.

This really hit home for me. Depression is no joke. It's not fun, it's crippling and painful

"Everyone's life is a tragedy" -Jordan Peterson. Love this man. We need more of him.

hey peterson, i wrote u at my lowest. ive risen. alot of it is from listening to you. thank you. u saved a life

Right away you see he's a special professor: he speaks looking at every student, interacting deeply with them, he conveys his passion for the subject, his profound knowledge.

On anti-depressants: "Try this man, maybe you won't cut your throat in the next month because if you're dead it's going to be hard to work with you" I love this guy :)

As a man who used to struggle with depression these are the most helpful things I can think of: -Take Risks, don't let the fear of failure stop you from trying something new or something great -Do things that genuinely scare you or that you're afraid of (Even little things like climbing onto a roof and helping to put up Christmas lights if you're afraid of heights or saying something to the cute cashier girl other than "hi" and "thanks") -Pursue an ambitious goal, one that a lot of people don't believe you can achieve (It doesn't even matter if you fail this because no matter what the pursuit of an ambitious goal will make you a better person and give you fulfillment) With that being said, do your best to succeed -Have a passion, basically this means to find a hobby that you enjoy so much that you will spend hours and hours getting better at it -Study history, pick a role model, and then analyze the traits of your role model and list the reasons why you admire them. Then start to emulate these traits in your everyday life and eventually you will become your own role model. -Don't ever quit something just because it's hard (You can quit a crappy job if it's not the right fit for you, but never quit solely based on the fact that something is difficult). Embrace challenges and look for opportunities to improve yourself mentally, physically, and spiritually. -Never put yourself down. Try not to think negative things about yourself and especially never say them out loud. You will think more highly of yourself when you say positive things about yourself, at the very least avoid putting yourself down on purpose. -Live purposefully. Have a direction for your life and if you don't already have one, make one. Decide what's most important to you and live accordingly. If you have a family or even a single loved one, your first priority (other than serving God if you're religious) should be to provide for them, to protect them, and to help them become the best version of themselves -Develop Integrity. I can't even explain how much this increases your self-repsect. Be honest, be trustworthy, don't cheat (unless you're in a street fight) and live with honor. -Find a hobby that you're really passionate about and strive to become a master at it -Finally, probably the most important thing I can say is to think less about yourself. Think less about yourself but not less of yourself. In other words, think about other people before you think about yourself, especially your family and loved ones. If you're focused on helping them with their problems I can promise you that your problems will become less important and less troublesome. Look for opportunities to help others and make them feel better about themselves. Nothing lifts you out of depression better than helping someone out of theirs. I hope this helps. I realize that some people are genetically predisposed to having a harder time with depression, but I believe that there's nothing you can't overcome with a strong mindset. In addition, I strongly believe that going through depression and having such terrible lows actually gives you the capacity to feel even greater happiness and joy. The reason I say this is because when you feel genuine joy after being depressed for so long you can't help but feel grateful. The beauty of life is that we are meant to experience the full range of human emotions, from happiness to anger to jealousy to despair to joy. We couldn't feel genuine happiness if we never knew what it was like to be sad. If I could talk to whoever is reading this face-to-face, what I would say to you would be simple: don't quit. A quote from Winston Churchill kept me going in times when I thought I had nothing left, he said: "If you're going through Hell, keep going." Everything in life can be and is meant to be an opportunity to make yourself better, and depression is no exception. Keep fighting, all of you are descended from warriors no matter what culture or country you are from. You wouldn't be here today if it weren't for the conquering spirit of your ancestors. Live a life that would make them proud. While most of us will not fight in physical wars, no one is exempt from the battlefield of life. Depression can be a battle every single day, every single second in some cases. Keep fighting, it will only get better. And the more you fight, the more you will gain respect for yourself. I've conquered my depression. Every now and then it will start to try and creep back into my mind but I don't let it. I destroy those feelings with action. I go lift weights, I go running, I listen to metal music, whatever it takes for me to regain my confidence. You can conquer depression, no matter how severe it is. That doesn't mean you'll never have days where you feel down, but it does mean that you'll have the strength to push through and do what you need to do as a man regardless of how you're feeling. Stay strong, stay hard, and fight like dragons 🐉 You're going to be very glad you did.

“Are you as educated as you are intelligent” I love this man he is a savior and damn anyone who tries to hurt this man.

This is so true. When you are depressed every single bad thing, how minor it migjt be can make you feel like you are worthless. This really hit me badly. I have been severly depressed for the past 6 years. Tried to commit suicide once. Now I am a little better but still not well. Hopefully some people can relate and we can help each other. God bless and thank you Dr. Peterson.

I used to have a problem with anxiety, depression and paranoia. Then I started training MMA and thaiboxing at a gym where we train extremely hard conditioning and fitness. Cured me in two years. I recommend the same for anyone with any such illness: start exercising really, really hard!

My son left us at 18. Your words were helpful. Thank you. How I wish he was here. Beautiful kid.

I love this man. I used to hate everything he said. But then I realized how much of my problems I was causing. Now i can hear what he's saying. And he's damn right tho..

"It is difficult to find happiness within oneself, but it is impossible to find it anywhere else" -Arthur Schopenhauer

"It's the unnecessary misery that really brings you down."

Please don't ever delete this. I think I need to watch it every week for the rest of my life.

Its time to make some changes in my life. Im going to get out of a toxic relationship and learn to love myself.

I am not right wing nor Republican. Jordan appeals to my moral intellect and my hearts desire to do good. In his lectures he confirms my understanding of meaning, knowledge that he accumulated from other people's writings and other people's experiences.

Imagine him being on your side like a therapist!? wow

I’m so happy he is ‘controversial’ because had it not been so, I may have never seen this lecture. He makes you think and expands your mind in ways you didn’t know you could.

Dr Peterson is one of the most honest person I have heard. He speaks from the heart and admits his own pitfalls. He has a great amount of Wisdom, most people do not even know what wisdom is. I pray blessing upon his family. I admire his sincerity to want to help people.

This CD has three separate relaxation/meditation sessions on it ru-vid.comUgkxzpa8CIfZcihW4Z0F_ja0QF3W9KIatrsq guided by a very pleasant and direct male voice. Unlike so many other products of its type, this CD does not have bad synthesizer music, does not feature a phony or affected style of narration, and does not make any bogus claims to be subliminal or to re-train the brain or any of that balderdash. What you get is 1. a guided meditation for getting into a pleasantly relaxed state of body awareness while taking a stroll (superb for those easing back into a fitness routine slowly after an illness or injury) 2. A nice long breath-awareness relaxation session that if followed diligently can put you into very deep states of full-body relaxation and mental calmness, and 3. a buddhist-inspired meditation session designed to help you develop and maintain feelings of loving kindness toward not just yourself and your friends, but toward people you don't even like. The CD makes no claims to be designed for advanced meditators or for buddhists or hindus/yoga practitioners looking for very deep and esoteric stuff. It is geared more toward the average person who just wants to develop the habit of relaxation and stress relief through natural, healthy means. him, if you happen to be reading this, keep up the good work fella, and I love your accent. I would also like to note that I have never fallen asleep while listening to this product. I would like to kindly suggest to the reviewer who said this CD makes him fall asleep, that he might want to get checked to see if he has a sleep disorder, or if he is simply not setting aside ample time for restful sleep at night. A healthy person getting adequate rest at night should be able to go into deep states of mental relaxation without dozing off, if not all the time, then most of the time.

What I got from each seminar: 1) if you need/have medication take it 2) figure out a healthy way to solve a problem instead of jumping to the worst case scenario 3) give yourself/body a schedule your mood will be much better regulated 4) don’t come after yourself so hard, work hard as much as the future is secured, come out of your routine every so often, life is a rats nest of misery and it can be tragedy but not hell 5) you have to be a fool if you want to be a master if you’re not willing to be a fool then you’re not gonna be a master, it’s part of the course it’s not indication that you failed it’s indication tat it’s really hard, the fact that you’re full of faults doesn’t mean you stop or you can’t learn.

I'm glad you mentioned the medical intervention. I was a 30 yearl old woman in hospital and so depressed that I hung myself. I was found and resuscitated and went on to receive ECT treatments. It took years for the doctors to find the right medication cocktail for me. They succeeded and after 12 years of agony and insomnia, I came back to life. I went back to work and could socialize again and despite the hell I went through, I feel only gratitude.

I burst into tears at several points in this video. I've watched it several times and it's been so helpful. God bless JP.

To whomever put this together: I deal with, sometimes crippling, depression on a daily basis. This video has helped me so much! I watch it from time to time when I can't pull myself out of the void.. Thank you.

This guy really knows what he is doing. I have been depressed ever since some time after I had entered puberty (I am 35 now) and lacking a sense of meaning has been the most diffcult challenge to overcome and the most wicked anchor which has kept dragging me down whenever I have almost come out of it. And I am Korean and do not understand what he is saying 100%, but the message came across straight through my heart...I am afraid I will develop another addiction from today. I hope everything is fine for everyone.

When he said "you do what you need to get better" I cried like the first time I was told as a real person that it wasn't my fault I felt the things I did. Hearing the things you need to hear hurts sometimes. I've had depression for 10 years, I started a new medicine last month that finally has started to help.

I just turned 27, I think I fell into the "lost cause" category. I work full time, 44hours a week. I have a highschool diploma with no college, I spent so much time focusing on being a chef I severely neglected my social life. I hit a bad portion of my life awhile back with my partner and lost everything. I've been trying to rebuild for awhile and just seem to not be able to. I know I'm depressed, my mind has been a dark place for a decently uncomfortable amount of time. So.... No Assets, No Friends, No Family, I work full time to this day, always have. Somehow I live in my car without any drug addiction. The world is a harsh place, to me it feels like I've just been battered mentally, or maybe it's emotionally I can't tell the difference anymore lately. Watching your lectures keeps me moving. I don't even know what about your lectures keeps me from the final steps off the ledge. Your lectures have helped me make plans to advance my position, but it's never been quite enough for me to do alone. I turned 27 on December 30th. I've given myself one year to achieve a goal I've set. I have a plan. I need it to work out. I guess what I'm saying is thank you.

“The fact that you are full of faults doesn’t mean you can’t learn!” This is gold!!!!

I’ve been depressed for what feels like an eternity. This guy comforts and understands me

I lost my husband to cancer 1 year ago. I didn't realize how depressed I was. I can't go to a job turn them down, make excuses to do things. Just talked to Dr yesterday and he will up meds. Hope this works and my son turned me on to these videos. Like them so far

As someone who's battled depression for a few years and kept it private in shame this has honestly opened my eyes a lot and made me want to get better 😊.

I wish I had a teacher like Jordan Peterson, earlier in my life. I can never have enough of his insight on psychology and understanding oneself in society. I feel blessed to be able to hear this very amazing Man.

Jordan actually did save my life I have had pretty server depression for a long time and I saw this video and thought why not hear what this dude has to say I was already a fan and knew he was smart so I gave it a go and I'm so glad I did because his advice works and i'm talking from the perspective of someone that was at the lowest of lows I had no job no family no romantic relationship no place to call home ect and what he said about putting these little practices into place slowly changed things for me and so I would fully recommend to anyone that has depression to take his advice on board get a routine eat enough sleep enough do not make things more complicated than they need to be do not do anything that could add to the misery you already feel that is out of you're control challenge yourself if you are agreeable try being disagreeable and do it all one tiny step at a time and see how much it changes in the longrun! Now I can get out of bed and want to do things that make me happy finally I have had a stable relationship the healthiest I have ever had for a little while now I am doing a job I love and I have my own place it is never to late to turn anything around.

I never seen an educator be able to command the attention of so many people. After 18 years in school and grad school, I've never had a teacher even come close. Absolutely incredible.

Jordan has a unique ability to pitch his analogies in a highly descriptive and almost theatrical way. His explanations are intelligent. He breaks down concepts in such a way that simplies the content, making his lectures virtually comprehensible by virtually anyone, while being far from boring.

Shame to those who spit on the name of this man. This video makes me understand myself and see life in a way that set me free from my high self judging depressed self and change people's life for the better. God bless him for real

¡This paragraph made me blow my mind!: "Even if you had the best opportunity, in your incomplete form, the probability that you see it as an opportunity is 0".

Man, when he said “punish them when they get something good-that’s always fun” it was like an arrow right in my heart.

Jordan Peterson gave me the meaning of life in 3 yrs at the age of 60 that I never understood in 12 + yrs of schools . On line and his books . Thank you Jordan 😊

Honestly, when you asked, "are you as educated as you are intelligent" I started to cry. I've never asked myself this before and it hit home hard. Thank you for always being so to the point.

After hearing "If you're sick, you have to treat it" I was in tears for the rest of this talk/compilation. This really hit home.

"'Meaning' it's a form of instinct that orients people in time and space. It's not an epiphenomena, it's the most fundamental form of perception." that got to me. What a ride for these students to able to have classes with Mr Peterson through out a year or two.

It feels good to know there’s really slot of other people who understand the suffering that comes with mental illness. I struggle with depression,OCD and anxiety all while have been isolated socially for 8 years. Every time in school I tried to get myself out of the loneliness but I’ve always been rejected,bullied or misunderstood. It’s a painful cycle that destroys your self worth and confidence that the next time you try you’ll make it. It makes you stop believing in Good. If I didn’t find a relationship with God I wouldn’t be here or commenting this today. I still contemplate and think about how easy it would be to feel the pain of a bullet for a split second rather than suffer every night and day with no sleep, food or confidence. But I know that there’s no good outcome from killing yourself for you or your family members even if it’s only 3 people.

Imagine having the opportunity to be in his class and listen to him speak every day. No chance you won't come out a slightly better and more intelligent person each time.

I’ve never heard someone speak that makes such perfect sense every sentence and I want to hear every word.

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." -Fyodor Dostoevsky

Hello guys I have been watching some video and I was thinking about investing in bitcoin/forex but still don't know where to start from.

I see him, I start cleaning my room.

If you combine Dr Peterson's achievements in the field of clinical psychology with his courageous stance against postmodernism and identity politics, he is one of the outstanding people alive today. I would love to see him nominated for a Nobel prize or some equally serious recognition of the work he does to make the world a better place. We need more Jordan Petersons in this world and fewer ignorant, mendacious, malevolent and narcissistic postmodernist fools.

I’ve been unable to cry for a good while now and this made me cry in the first 7 minutes

This was really eye opening. Really helped me understand my depression and how to tackle it. Really smart guy thank you

"Are you as educated as you are intelligent?" <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="145">02:25</a> That line is so perfectly said and comes across as genuine and not snarky. Wow.

I got roughly 11mins in and felt my eyes start to well. I wish I had someone like him in my early life.

Best and most useful advice I ever took from Peterson is that thinking about yourself causes depression. I control what I think about and, with practice, I could force myself to think about something (or someone) else. It worked a lot better than any antidepressants. Negative thoughts are toxic.

Recovering alcoholic here I got to be honest finally accepting antidepressants and Prozac for anxiety has completely changed my life. I would never be able to stay sober without the Prosac it was like a different world opened up to me that I can now prosper and be healthy. Yes on top of that I attend AA, work the steps help people but getting the deeper mental issues in some sort of control has allowed all that to get much deeper and healthier

This man is a treasure. I spent most of my life suffering in silence and he provided an extremely bright light for the damaged souls such as myself.

This man, like all men, will die someday. We are enriched he loves to talk so much. And it's been recorded. Long live the King.

He's not left or right. He just is an amazing human giving us gem after gem. Wish I discovered him 10 years ago. I don't look at him as a professor, for me he's been more of a phenomenal spiritual guide ✌❤❤✌

He's one of if not the greatest philosophers of our time

Jordan Peterson saved me, because of him after my life fell apart, my fiancee left me for another man, and I was losing myself, I found him and his book, and he has helped me start to drag myself out of the depths. Its not easy and I still have bad days but because of him, i have started the long climb back up. Thank you JP, and if i can do it any one can.

At the apex of my life, my Dad died suddenly, not unexpected but suddenly. It has been a tough road, a depressing trial, yet I'm still here. May God bless you to persevere! There are other lives which you need to influence!

i love his advice "you need to eat" is the most important thing

He certainly is the clearest and most intense social commentator ive ever heard.Using his immense knowledge and other multiple tools of explanation to allow all members of society to understand content that at times's is .. to say the least way to complicated. That in itself is an amazing talent.

what he said around <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="430">7:10</a> - <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="480">8:00</a> is spot on, i've suffered with severe depression most my life and he really nailed that point home. Every slight failure is like being hit by a truck; it makes your entire roadmap collapse and corrupts your core values to the point where you're unwilling to help yourself AND puts you at risk of intentionally sabotaging yourself. It's rough.

If you're truly engaged in Peterson's message, the music is not overly loud

this man is the absolute definition of a GENUINE HUMAN BEING! He leaves no stone unturned! xo

Amazing, he just explained addiction. All of those scalable things stacked are reflected in your actions/physiological responses. So to prevent addiction is to be mindful of the conversations we have with ourselves about ourselves when experiencing failures or hardship. A healthy mind determines course of action and future actions.

While listening to this the girl I'm into texted back. Little bit later in the conversation with this video on the background I found out I just got a date for the first time. I came here having the impression I'll never succeed and will never give a chance. Right now all that matters is that tomorrow I have a place to go with someone. It doesn't matter if it won't go well... I just made a huge step just by going out tomorrow. Thank you for showing us that eventually everybody deserves a reward at some point.

I'm a prior service U.S. Marine...grew up in Detroit city and in the foster care system. Recently I started working with therapy through the VA for PTSD and depression. I kicked that can down the road for years. I didn't want to talk about stuff because "men dont do that" you deal with it quietly and as a Black man I always heard that therapy was something only rich White people did (I understand the history behind that idea now) Basically I started going to therapy because I had a moment where I woke up from sleep and grabbed my wife's hand as she was stroking my beard and couldn't figure out where I was...that could have been my daughter...she's 6 and I couldn't forgive myself if I'd grabbed her little hand like that. I got to the point where I had to admit that I've been fighting since I was a kid and since I was 14 I've been tired of living, I'm 35 and been tired of living over half of my life. I went to get help because I don't want to self terminate (and I constantly fight that shadow) and leave my daughter with that burden...I dont want her to say "my father didn't love me enough to get help" or "my father was too proud to ask for help" I told my wife that I didn't have anything else to give anyone...I needed to help myself. It's only been a few weeks. But I finally said yes to the medication and counseling, I'm going to stick with it. So if anyone else that's dealing with things...find a reason to move forward. Even if it's just to feel better about yourself. Always forward, you aren't alone.

When my brother lie dying in a hospital bed. The room was full of helplessness. It came over me to UNDERSTAND…that HE needed directions. So, I got close and spoke in aviation terms, that were deepest in his heart. “It’s time to cross the TARMACK”… I knew what it meant. He more importantly, knew. In a minute, he took a big sigh and stopped breathing.

I still remember watching his lectures for the first time almost a year ago. They absolutely changed my life. His profound wisdom is unmatched by many, is any at all. Dr. Jordan B. Peterson is one of the most intelligent men alive.

He's absolutely right, depression affects families just as bad as the individual. When I'm depressed and suicidal I could care less because I've been down that road many times before... But when my friends and family see me in a dark place, pushing them away they get confused. They get upset and don't understand, what is going on. It feels awful indirectly hurting the ones that you love.