Kai F%$king Leng Is HERE | Castle Super Beast Clips 

The fact that Kai Leng is the lamest person in a galaxy full of badasses is legitimately the funniest thing about him.

It's worse than it sounds. Thane doesn't have "lizard cancer", he has a species-specific version of Multiple Sclerosis. Dude is in a hospital, getting constant treatment, but he can't breathe properly and he has dizzy spells and numbness. Cardio messes him up. He still goes toe to toe with Kai "bad fanfic self-insert" Leng before dying.

My favorite part is the back and forth between him and Shepard when you finally fight him. Shepard: "You ran on Thessia! You ran at the Citadel!" Kai Leng: "Shut up! (ಥ﹏ಥ)"

It says a lot about how much people hated the ending that this guy somehow escaped years of ridicule.

Can confirm Kai Leng is a cheating edgelord scrub. The second fight with him is a giant "YOU DIDN'T WIN!" where he cheats, runs away then sends you a shitpost email

You know what's even funnier? If you beat Kai Leng's ass hard enough in one of the fights, the fight just breaks. You HAVE to let him run back and suck his thumb and recharge his shields.

"You shoulda seen him, when you couldn't see him" is the best thing I've heard in a bit

To be fair, the cancer-ridden guy who beat him was basically Space John Wick

Kai Leng is like that one dude from Indiana Jones who did all the sword flips and flourishes and then Indy just shoots him once and he dies but is treated as if he's final boss material

I love Kai Leng, he's so PERFECT in his awfulness. After everything you've faced in this series, you see this guy and your immediate gut reaction is something like "Oh honey, you're not ready for this. Here, sit down, I'll make you some tea." It's like he's just this cosplayer who saw the apocalypse happening and thought "Yes, this is my moment. I finally have an excuse to unleash my TRUE SELF."

the funny part with comparing him to Jetstream Sam is that Sam is TOTALLY THE OPPOSITE IN TERMS OF POWER ADVANTAGES. Remember, Sam was kicking Raiden's ass six ways to sunday with only cybernetics in his right arm and an exosuit... which makes him SUPER COOL. Hell, given how he is in the DLC, the cybernetics in his arm might not even be doing anything special and are just there because his arm was injured. FUCK Jetstream Sam is fuckin' cool.

Kai Leng's evil harem ninjas are actually way more dangerous than him. Cerberus Phantoms have a one-hit-kill attack. Kai Leng doesn't. He's a boss-character who's less dangerous than his own adds.

So Kai Lang proves the shadow broker right, that if Miranda and Jacob leave Cerberus is crippled. Kai Lang is the best agent the elusive man has, when those two leave and can't beat a guy who needs an oxygen tank to sleep.

You guys are calling him Shadow the hedgehog, but the Infinite in sonic forces is literally _that guy_ to Shadow. Shadow doesn't even remember him when Infinite rants about not being weak anymore.

The best (worst?) part about Thane kicking Kai Leng's ass is that KL succeeded in stabbing Thane before running away, BUT! It was a completely clean wound, Thane literally walked it off in S E C O N D S and starts shooting toward running KL. He didn't even die from it, he died from his disease because he lost blood and he needed all the blood he had.

Pat is late to the party on this, but he's so fucking right and it's mega cathartic to listen to. "He looks like he doesn't belong in Mass Effect." Nobody has ever said anything more correct.

Literal. Cereal. Killer. Pretty much the only thing he ever successfully killed.

Kai Leng sends you an email that basically says "next time, I won't miss"

The Shepard clone fight is way more dramatic than any fight with Kai Leng.

So you should always do the renegade interrupt after his last fight, but the absolute funniest thing about Kai Leng, far better than his adrenaline fueled cereal eating, is that if you DON'T take the renegade interrupt and break his sword... he fucking MISSES and Shepard shanks him anyhow

I like the idea of the two writers trying to race their drafts to the editor’s desk in the morning which sets Kai’s characterisation for the day.

In a series that contains works of art like Vigil, Suicide Mission, Sarens theme, Leaving Earth and the Galaxy Map theme etc. Kai Leng is RE1 Directors Cut Mansion Basement

EVERYTHING'S COMING UP KAI LENG!!! *proceeds to stub toe repeatedly, get ass beaten by a supposedly weakened non-combatant*

My favorite part of Kai Leng is that he literally cant do anything without screwing up in some way. He'll fail to kill the Councilor in 99% of playthroughs Traynor tracks him to Horizon after he steals the Thessia object Miranda plants a bug on him that leads you to Cerberus HQ. He sucks so bad.

I love the bit where he jumps on Shepard's car during the Citadel air chase, and he takes forever to dramatically look up because he's that desperate to look cool.

"No, now it's fun." Woolie died from cringe immediately after hearing such concentrated cringe.

If you don’t take the renegade interrupt to kill Kai Leng (even though he dies either way, but I’ll be damned if I don’t give him the additional “fuck you” of shattering his precious katana) you’re objectively playing the game wrong.

This character is so forgettable. I literally forget him every time. Like i swear people have reminded me more times than i can remember, and yet i never remember this guy

Kai "Pussy" Leng Remains one of my favourite insults toward a fictional character ever XD Pisstream Sam is also amazing XD

I love how after he's introduced the game has a scene where they literally say "That guy should be ashamed." because someone basically almost dead from lung cancer kicks his ass.

"We want this character to have a spinoff." They gotta earn it first.

The best part about Kai Leng is that gameplay-wise he’s just a reskinned Phantom except he’s actually weaker because he doesn’t have the instakill. Second-best part: The fight with Thane obviously only happens if he survived ME2. But if he didn’t, Kirrahe from ME1 will intervene instead. If Kirrahe also died, Kai Leng will actually succeed and kill the Councillor. In other words, you need to have fucked up twice for him to get a win on you.

Kai "You only won cuz my baby was distracting me with his crying" Leng

The worst part about Kai Leng is that not only does he suck, he's so utterly forgettable. I will never remember Kai Leng on my own. I have to be reminded of that character's existence, and I've played ME3 twice.

"People were getting, you know, hate-excited?" The word Pat is looking for is "excitred."

As someone who's never touched Mass Effect, I had never heard of Kai Leng, hearing Pat describe him makes me think he comes from some alternate universe Hunt Down the Freeman but for Mass Effect.

Holy fuck. I knew ME3 had a short development but fucking 14 MONTHS!? It is astounding and a credit to how good Bioware once was that even half that game was as good as it was. Christ.

There's something to be said for an in-universe tryhard character. Revolver Ocelot and Teruki Hanazawa are great not because they're cool, but because they absolutely think they're cool. A properly written Kai Leng would be largely the same but with the rest of the cast being appropriately baffled by his goofiness.

ME3 came out the same year as MGR if I'm not mistaken. You could've fought Kai Leng and Jetstream Sam back to back shortly after each released. Just imagine that.

Literally all I know about this character is that he (SPOILERS) Good. You opened this message. This isn't actually asari military command. They're busy tending to what's left of their planet. So you survived our fight on Thessia. You're not as weak as I thought. But never forget that your best wasn't good enough to stop me. Now an entire planet is dying because you lacked the strength to win. The legend of Shepard needs to be re-written. I hope I'm there for the last chapter. It ends with your death. -KL

That "Ooooh no, they made fan fiction" just slays me.

Literally the only thing memorable of Kai in my only playthrough was, no shit, one-shotting him at the Cerberus base in such spectacular fashion. I was an Infiltrator and immediately cloaked to try to get some distance or cover, but he bum-rushed me like it didn't even matter. So while he was closing the distance, I was charging a shot from my Geth Javelin sniper rifle, and nailed a point blank headshot on him just as he got to me. This so called master assassin couldn't last even 10 seconds against a sniper at their most troublesome range. Pathetic.

Fuck the ending discourse, Kai Leng is actually the worst part about ME3. That fight on Thessia sucked so hard. Like oh here's this gunship you obliterated in ME2 at the beginning of the game, but for some reason you just can't beat it here because I don't know it has flood lights or something.

I remember playing this back when it came out and thinking- "They're doing this on purpose, right? They want me to think this dude is a huge jobber? There's no way they think he's cool." And Pat, don't you dare talk shit about the greatest assassin in the galaxy, Thane. Thane is JUST THAT GOOD and he got all the heat they wanted Kai Leng to have. And then the best scene in the game happens after he beats him.

Thank you Editor Woolie for reducing the lead-in time to the video. I know you may not know if we noticed, but we did, and we appreciate it greatly. Sincerely, The people who listen to these in the background.

Kai Leng! He can really move! Kai Leng! He's got an attitude! Kai Leng! He's the fastest thing aliiii- *gets waffle-stomped*

Every time Kai Leng isn't on screen, Shepard and everyone in the party should be asking, "Hey, where's Kai Leng?"

how could a character be such a mary sue but job so much at the same time??

One of my favorite things about the terrible Kai Leng cereal novel is that they never even made the promised revised version. They just hid in the corner until people stopped asking them about it.

I dont like the thane disrespect going on here. Its not that hes so bad a lizard cancer dude can sneak up on him. Its thane is so good he can sneak up on him even with advanced stage lizard cancer

Next to the ghost kid, Kai Leng is the walking embodiment of everything wrong with Mass Effect 3.

I know this is a hot take but Kai Leng is way overheated he's an extremely cool character. Heck he's even better then Virgil who's actually kinda lame when you think about. I know that's gonna get a lot of hate but let me just explain why: Good. You expanded this comment. This isn't actually an explanation on why Kai Leng is cool because he's actually a total bitch.

The funny part is that in the multiplayer, you can play a Vanguard class called the *N7 Slayer,* who basically have Kai Leng's moves but not his name or personality, or L's Already cooler.

So, here's the fun bit about Kai Leng. PRIOR to the release of Mass Effect 3, there were a series of Mass Effect books which star Mr. Leng as their POV character. These books aren't TERRIBLE. But they DO read like those Star Trek books that William Shatner commissioned back in the day about Captain Kirk -- the ones that served to mostly jerk off Captain Kirk and by proxy, William Shatner. Then, during prerelease coverage of ME3, you can interviews where Bioware folks are GIDDILY talking about how Cerberus is 'back' and in a 'big' way and how they have a FOIL to Commander Shepard that makes them ULTRA dangerous oooooo~ The people conducting those interviews, despite the tight lips of Bioware, IMMEDIATELY called out that the only person this 'mystery anti-shepard' could be was Kai Leng. Because Kai Leng is the *ONLY* character who is *EVER* compared to Commander Shepard. Ever. No character compares Wrex to Shepard. Or Ashely. Or Vega, or Garrus *fucking* Vakarian! Because *EVERYONE* else gets to be their *OWN* badass in the ME universe, they do their own badass things independent of Shepard and are recognized as individuals, who just so happen to hang out with Shepard. This is good, since it not only makes Shepard look cool, by letting Shepard be Shepard, but it makes eeeeeeeeveryone else look cool too, by letting them *NOT* be 'Commander Shepard but...' Not Kai Leng though. Kai Leng, of all characters, is constantly reffered to as the 'anti-shepard'. Which is somewhat funny, when you realize cerberus has an ACTUAL CLONE OF SHEPARD that would have been an unironically BETTER choice for the main campaign as a counter to commander shepard -- you COULD have saved Kai Leng for the Citadel DLC and had a BLAST with him being this galaxy trotting psychic cyborg ninja samurai assassin... and having NOBODY hear about him. The jokes write themselves. But no. Instead we unironically get a guy who's biggest claim to fame is that he's called the 'anti-shepard' without anybody realizing that THAT termonology, "anti-shepard" means that he is everything Shepard is not. Such as: Charismatic, driven, capable, successful, well-liked, respected, skilled, good humored, caring, relentless, AND MANY MORE THINGS! practically

I found out about a mod that straight up just takes out all of kai legs dialogue and changes his appearance to be a male version of the phantom enemies that he's the boss of, makes him match cerberous visual design. Legit improves his character so much. When the way to improve a character is to literally take out all of his dialogue you know you fucked up.

my favorite part about him is he actually sends you trolling hate mail. He's literally what happens if a fedora gain sentience and writes an OC

So is Woolie making these thumbnails or hired someone to do them? Cos either way they look quite nice. Also that ceral nonsense is great, god I love bad game novels

Kai Leng may suck, but at least the cyborge ninja infiltrator in multiplayer was dope as fuck

I had completely forgotten about this character but, Pat's description brought it back. I remember having the same reaction. Everyone is talking about how amazing and dangerous Kai Leng was but, everything I saw made him look like a parody. I was expecting the whole scenario to be some kind of rich kid paying to pretend to be awesome.

That one terrible Mass Effect book is like that one guy who made The Entity in SWOTOR and was like “That’s Kreia!”. They knew nothing.

Kai Leng looks straight out of Deus Ex: Human Revolution. It's such hideously out-of-place character design.

This is why Sam is the best in Revengence. Cause in midst of all the superpowered cyborg bullshit, he's just a guy with a cool suit and a REALLY cool sword Also his theme is amazing

So cathartic to listen to someone complain about kai leng to someone who doesn't know him

As someone who knew nothing and had never played Mass Effect until getting the Legendary Edition, Kai Lang was a real interesting surprise. He was such and unlikeable, cringey, tryhard, self-insert OC, wannabe billy badass that he single-handedly brought down the game. He (and really the rest of Cerberus) really just serves no purpose in the story besides dragging it down- they add nothing, they don't do anything that random Indoctrinated or the Reapers couldn't, and yet the game does basically everything to insist that they are a massive threat. They even give Kai a "nuh-uh you can't hurt me" anti-everything shield so that you can't beat him until they finally let you. He was so bad, I didn't even think about all the other shortcomings ME3 had. Finally stabbing him on Cronos Station is such sweet relief, I can't even tell you. It felt like I was finally free. Shame that only happens at the end of the game.

I will NEVER get over how the big fight with him on Thessia concludes with him summoning a gunship to give him covering fire while he runs away, then he sends you a fucking email talking about how he won that fight and is so much better than you, and I was just reading it like "fucking WHAT?", I wasn't even angry, I was confused as hell at why he was bragging about winning a fight he lost, and I know he lost because I WAS THERE

14:14 Woolie is in physical pain here

Preggo Leng The Immortal Hedgehog

Interesting theory by Pat. I remember getting the vibe that this guy supposed to be something to worry about and then literally laughing every time he's on screen 🤣

I will always remember the fight my engineer Shepard had against Leng in the Asari temple. Sabotage w/+100% tech damage, and maxed out Overload. Bitch didn't take five steps without "falling back to heal."

I'm reminded of Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Dude jumps out of the crowd and swings and twirls and edgelords a pair of scimitars and Indy just pulls out his gun and shoots him.

EXCELLENT thumbnail, God damn.

An insufferable weeb OC in *my* military space opera? It's more likely than you think!

I legit forgot that Kai Leng exists, seriously, I don't remember him even right now that Pat is talking about him, I can't remember encountering him in ME3. Hell, I remember the awful Jessica Chobot cameo, but not Kai Leng

Who else can't wait for Woolie and Reggie to reach Kai Leng?

Having just played LE, I feel he doesn’t need to be there. A more interesting idea would’ve be that out of Jack,Miranda and Jacob, you can only save 2, the one left behind gets warped into serving Cerberus. More emotional punch that way.

Good. You opened this message. This isn't actually asari military command. They're busy tending to what's left of their planet. So you survived our fight on Thessia. You're not as weak as I thought. But never forget that your best wasn't good enough to stop me. Now an entire planet is dying because you lacked the strength to win. The legend of Shepard needs to be re-written. I hope I'm there for the last chapter. It ends with your death. -KL

"You didn't win." - KL

The worst part of the Revengance Nightwing rivalry is that he doesn't even APPEAR until halfway through the game, and even then you only meet him like 3 times. That no where near enough time to establish someone who is treated as the Dragon of Cerberus. Edit: I can't speak for the novels, but I will say what little I've seen of the books they actually handle Kai better for one reason, he keeps loosing, but then he upgrades. Shot in the legs, amputee them and get cybernetics. Overpowered by biotics, get better ones. Hand gets broken, get a cyber one with a freaking Shotgun. It really adds to his "I WILL BE BETTER" personality. They should had that be the plot in ME3 where everytime you beat him he gets more and more Reaper Tech, instead of this Gary Stue BS.

Kai Leng reminds me of that one guy in From Russia With Love who was supposed to be a super awesome Anti-Bond and he got his shit rocked on that train.

What I don't like Kai Leng is that he was shoe-horned in at the last minute as a supposed rival to Shepard. It doesn't work because there's no history there. They tried too hard with him

This is my head canon. The only reason why Kai Leng existed.... Was to make the N7 shadow infiltrator in multiplayer. It literally does the same shit as Kai Leng, Katana: Yup, Turns invisible: Yup, Naruto runs with sword behind back: Yup. Has an electric slash: Yuuuup (I don't remember if the loser used this but it sounded like something he did.) The only reason Kai Leng existed in the game was to sell DLC for the multiplayer.

Does anyone remember the New 52 version of Lobo? He reminds me of Kai Leng, as In he became the very thing he was supposed to be a parody of

Literally the lamest character Troy Baker has ever voiced. This is basically his Green Lantern.

7:35 - Yeah. Coming from someone who played 1 and 2 with three different Shepherds before finally getting to 3 with almost all of its vital DLC and finishing it, unspoiled, eight years after the original release came out, and you can feel it on the wall. Granted, it kinda depends on your situation. But I'm sitting on the opposite end of solving the Geth and Quarian conflict only to get to the Mass Effect 3 ending and the game is telling me I can't solve that type of problem so we're all doomed. But I literally already solved that problem. I didn't hate Mass Effect 3 or its ending, but I certainly didn't LOVE its "best" ending and its things like what Pat's describing that did it for me, in addition to the fact that you just don't see the other side of the ending really. Not in the way a massive trilogy like Mass Effect would warrant. You'd WANT the 40 minutes falling action akin to Return of the King, but you don't get that. That's the true sour note in 3's ending for me.

boy, I'm glad I read fanfiction, the quality is leagues above what professional authors could ever dream of!

Kai Leng is the perfect example of why book shit should never take precedent over what's been established in the games.

Kai Leng's design looks like every futuristic/cyberpunk armor design rolled into 1.

I remember genuinely laughing my ass off when the mission came up that Cerberus had invaded the Citadel. It was just one of those moments that I realized the writers had not paid attention to the lore of the previous games and wanted to make Space COD. That was only further solidified with Kai Leng, he existed to be the supra kewl badass but only succeeded in pissing off the fanbase with how lame he was.

Kai Leng is what happens when you dump a main character from a series into another series, no more plot armour, things no longer just conveniently work out in his favour, he has to spend the entire game experiencing exactly what his enemies up till then had to deal with when they fought him.

Kai Leng looks like a rejected Metal Gear cyborg

I am so glad more people are noticing how wierd Kai Leng is. Pat's simple description of it all makes it funny.

Going with the Metal Gear parallels...I think the fight against Gray Fox is a good example. Because the way you beat him is by using Chaff grenades to interfere with his cybernetics and that fight becomes a straight fist fight halfway through, and it ends in a draw.

From: Asari Military Command Good. You opened this message. This isn't actually asari military command. They're busy tending to what's left of their planet. So you survived our fight on Thessia. You're not as weak as I thought. But never forget that your best wasn't good enough to stop me. Now an entire planet is dying because you lacked the strength to win. The legend of Shepard needs to be re-written. I hope I'm there for the last chapter. It ends with your death. -KL

The Illusive Man is more intimidating than Kai Leng and he is just a white dude in a chair with some cyber eyes and a smoke

How did Bioware walk away from the writing room and think in any way that Kai Leng was a good character? I can only come to the same conclusion as Pat that the writers were arguing behind the scenes on how to present him. He was the worst villain in the entire series.

I laughed SO damn hard when Woolie said: "Kai Leng The Hedgehog"! X'D

"Piss-Stream Sam" is my favorite. Leng is forever that now in my mind.

I've never heard of Kai Leng since I never played ME3, so I looked him up and found the picture Pat was talking about right above an article titled: "Kai Leng Would Have Sucked Less If He Shut The Fuck Up." Incredible.

"3 vs 1, these are bad odds" "No, now it's fun" You know, every sci fi space opera game, but especially shooters, has been dogged for twenty years by the question "How does it measure up to Halo?", and if I were the guy at Bioware writing the dialogue I would REALLY focus on avoiding anything that calls that question back into the player's mind, especially from a tryhard character like Kai Leng, quoting the Shipmaster does not make him seem any cooler

There's so many times in the game where you encounter him and you're just like "I could just unload an entire clip into his head and we'll be done with this nonsense" but the game won't let you Hell on blue chick planet you beat him so bad he constantly calls in an attack copter so he can kiss his boo-boos uninterrupted like a toddler calling a timeout and he ends up winning through cutscene It doesn't matter how goody-two-shoes Paragon I'm playing whenever it's the final battle I always go for the Renegade interrupt so I can shatter his dumbass katana I don't even know if there's another version of the fight where you finish him some other way cuz I don't care to see it