Medical professionals, what's the worst N*FW injury you've seen? 

I've gotten so many guys to stop lying to me about their "massive dongs" by saying "well if it's really that big then we aren't doing it because I'm not a fan of getting torn up or having my cervix rammed" lol

When he returned in sliver bracelets and anklets it was because he had been arrested and jailed. He was taken to the emergency room for treatment in cuffs and shackles.

FLARED BASE. FLARED BASE PEOPLE. JUST BUY THE DAMN TOY. WITH A FLARED BASE!!!

Professionals will laugh at stuff in the hospital but not IN FRONT of the patient or other patients 😅

Not a meic, but one of my female coworkers once showed up in the office obviously tired and not very well. She told us that she would do her work while standing up instead of sitting. After her uncomfortable standing at her desk not really accomplishing much as she wasn't able to focus on anything her supervisor took her into the office to ask what is up. Then she was sent home to heal up. Afterwards her supervisor told us the story she gave to him. As she told him she used something called loveballs which would be pushed into her kitty while being banged and the dude banged her so hard, those love balls got entirely shufed into her and they weren't able to get them out. She then spent the entire night in hospital untill a doctor was able to remove the object and afterwards went straight to the office hoping that somehow nobody would find out. Moral of this one: If you have an embarrasing injury don't show up at work, but call in sick. That way only HR will see the sick note. If you try showing up at work to hide it, everybody will eventually find out.

Oh trust me medical professionals laugh at everything, my mother's a nurse and I've been around the clinic and hospital in my hometown enough to know that if it's something funny or embarrassing you're getting laughed at and other nurses will tell them go read their truck go read their chart I hope I don't have anything embarrassing in mine lol

I think the last story is suggesting that he was in cuffs. As to why, well either he was caught trying to get with someone without consent, or he was deliberately trying to get rid of his balls because he's a kiddie diddler. Granted, I only ever saw that last one happen on a TV show, so take that with a pinch of salt

YESSSSSS BRO I MISSED YOUR VOICE IT'S A HUGE PART OF WHY I WATCH YOUR VIDS!!! (take it as a compliment, I like hearing someone who sounds like an actual person)

If it's an NSFW injury, it's probably the job that's not safe.

damn guys, y'all really bullied a professional voice actor

When I was a CNA in an ICU I had a patient who's rectum was perforated due to being fucked in the ass too hard. Also had a guy who was an EMT who dropped patients off with us from time to time so the ER staff knew him very well, and we kind of knew of him. Came in with a butt plug so far in his ass that it had to be surgically removed. Dude was so nonchalant about it, his nurse would come in (who he knew) and he would just be like "what's up Diana?"

Not a doctor but a medical coder so I read medical records and op notes daily. Many years ago a guy came in for constipation. Hadnt pooped in 4 week. Turns out he and his partner had made their own toy out of EPOXY, which changed shape due to heat and became stuck. He had to have surgery to have it removed. Doc said that the stool was so backed up that it practically exploded everywhere when they cut into his colon.

I got one! I worked in an urgent care clinic years ago. One somewhat busy Saturday and guy walks in. Seems normal enough and when I ask him what brought him in he said “I have puncture wounds”. I had to ask where as it would determine what room he would get. Instead of just telling me, he pulls out a small metal ring with three sharp prongs on it and says “this goes on a Chasity belt”. I shrugged it off and wasn’t really phased by it. Different strokes for different folks you know? Our poor medical assistant was horrified from it though 😂

Yes, proper toys with flared bases can be expensive. But nowhere near as expensive as the freaking ER!

Oh we absolutely laugh about stuff, but usually its in the break room later without any identifying information

Work as a night hospitalist (inpatient physician). Was doing notes in a work area, when a couple of surgeons were looking at a CT scan on the monitor. Happened to look, couldn't unsee the whole cucumber that was on the CT abdomen/pelvis scan. Don't know the backstory, but guy went into shock from a perforated bowel amd died...was murder.

About 15 years before I met my husband, I had a hernia fixed (belly button one and they did not use the mesh then) One Valentine's day my hubby and I were getting pretty amorous. He had my legs in the air and I stared screaming - he thought it was he was doing is so well, nope he twisted me funny and my hernia opened back up. We had to go to the ER and explain what happened and 2 hours later I was in surgery because when it popped out it strangulated my bowels. I now have mesh in there.

I'm not a doctor or nurse, but I had a friend who is into.. CBT and got drunk one night and decided to use an elastrator on his junk then pass out. 8 hours later, he wakes up to find his junk at the brink of death so he had to drive to a nearby hospital and explain the whole thing while being incredibly embarassed to a doctor. They managed to save his junk but he had to take medication for a bit.

“This story did *not* make him feel better.” I don’t know why I cracked up at this.

As one who worked in ERs for 20+ years, we do laugh, hilariously! Just not in front of patients!

I didn't see it but heard the call-out. It was the second day of a twelve week team building course I was and our team base or building was an active fire station. It was coming up to midday and there's a call out to the nearby hospital where a man had a ring stuck on/around his penis. A&E nurses could not remove it so they had to call 999 for a fire engine to cut the ring. We were all laughing. Thankfully, the guy seemed to be physically okay.

we have been heard, our narrator is back

WOOOOO old narrator is back babyyyy!!!!!!!!!

As far as you question of doctors laughing or making fun of patience and for them, they'll actually do that sometimes. It was a doctor retelling a story about the time this guy and his mom came into the hospital. I don't remember what the guy had but basically at the end of the story the doctor told the mother that her son is going to die of terminal fat really soon and there is nothing they can do about it.

Sadly i can explain the silver bracelets and anklets. And why he was so torn up. He put himself on someone, they tore him apart, then he got arrested for it.

I... suspect that in the case of the one girl, there probably was a pot brownie actually involved at some point. Likely more than one. Like, way, way, way more than one. The rest was probably just side effects of the pot brownie(s).

Welcome back og narrator!

They didn't let you quit, sorry but I like listening to you better

I know there is a scientific paper about PP injuries caused by Vorwerk Kobold vacuum Cleaners... There are no pictures in the paper itself, but there have been some on the internet... Its unbelievable that they even got some of them back together.

about the dong and the magnets ones... no dude. Medical Professionals are professionals when it comes to giving you medical care. They will still laugh their asses off at you if you've done something particularly stupid.

Watched a guy pull out a Foley catheter and leave his you-know-what looking like ground beef

Welcome back!!!! ❤

I got laughed at when i zipped my eye lid in my jacket TRUST ME THEY DO LAUGH AT U

old narrator please tell me your name in case you ever go missing again

A former paramedic teen girl fell off the roof after parents came back and fell on the sprinkler broke pelvis femur and had surgery to remove it from BH

Story 10: OP is lying about how those magnets got on.

honestly feel really bad for the lady in story 11, i hope she gets the mental help she needs

At 18 I was into but stuff got a vibration device stuck up there had to wake my grandma up and have her take me to the hospital to have it removed

"...the weight, not his manhood" 😂

I think the silver bracelets thing is meant to be "silver prevents infection so if I wear these it'll stop me getting an infection"

5:34 I was an aid in a hospital. These people wouldn't be in a hospital setting, or any clinical setting

Ran a call on a dude, was carrying his wife on him and slipped, broke his er ... pride and joy ... and nearly bled out internally.

Silver bracelets and anklets... HANDCUFFS AND LEG SHACKLES! In between hospital visits he got put in jail!

Welcome back John omg

The guy from Story 6 has the biggest fucking balls i've ever seen on a man. Literally.

So this is what janitors get up to in the cupboard together. I did wonder.

12:08 I am having a flashback to Weird Al’s parody of Genie in a bottle…..

I work in an er and yes we do sometimes have a good laugh and yes we tell other staff 😂 thts true

Silver bracelets and anklets refers to handcuffs. He was incarcerated.

3:18 it was so deep u could only see the ERASER????

Whats wrong with people 💀 why do they put the most random stuff in there

Could the silver bracelets and anklets mean handcuffs?

My sister is an RN, and you would be surprised how many things have to pulled out of people’s butts!…. And how many gangster bikers cry, as they pull rocks out of their flesh!….

Delbert is absolutely tiny down there, I still had quadruplets with him anyway because I love him

What is the game in the backround ?

why am I doing this to myself

Yeah, medical professionals can get kind of strange in the ER. So I'll buy the laughing.

I can believe the laughing one I've been to some pretty unprofessional hospitals My first physical when I was 14 the nurse was young and kinda hot and she commented the fact that I didn't get hard and asked if I was gay Another one dropped the gauze on the floor then still put it onto an open wound and I was about to get stitches for.

YEAHH THE OLD NARRATOR!!!

The 🐓 cone of shame. 🤣😂🤣💀

Its freakjng john isnt it

Wait...now "safe" is a word that needs to censored?!? Lmao

Why do people insist on putting things unsafe for orifices IN orifices?! There are actual, safe, made for orifices items you can purchase for said activities! You can order them online, totally discreet! There's literally zero excuse. Eesh!

I once saw a picture on bme (is that still a thing?), dong injected with mineral oil. it looked like what you would expect from jabba the hutts dong. oh, and injecting concrete is a seriously stupid idea too. who would have thought.

14:30 Umm, actually... That's more common in women. Not a majority to be clear. But larger minority of women like it when the guy is rough, then there are guys who like being rough.

I thought the first one naming the female genitalia a kitty, it was an actual feline. Then I got it. lol

Hey, the person playing that game isn't the best, I could send you gameplay of stuff if you want

3 minutes in and im noping out

Why the fuck is the S in NSFW censored? You do realize this stands for Not Safe For Work. You're censoring the word "Safe".

5:44 That's a lawsuit right there. If the hospital staff who're supposed to take care of you laugh at specifically your injury/accidnet. That's a lawsuit against the satff.

Are we really censoring abbreviations now fuck sakes this culture is weak