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Ima single dad and I fought for both of my kids. I got full custody of my son from his mother and joint with my daughter so idk what they talking about cuz I have to take off work when they sick
Yooooooo. Alot of people never heard their dad side. Most dads probably went mental just trying to explain, and the rest got tired of being disrespected and not appreciated for being there.
Most dads look at the situation and say I'd rather the child be mad at me than at her and never tell their side meantime the momma going out her way to paint him as the worst
@@nijaei children grow into adults, so why not love the man that you made a child with so he stay and loves you and his. Most women after having the baby treats the father like he's expendable . Everything you should do it because of the child,but that man really had the baby to make the woman happy. Mosten aren't even ready to be fathers because they never had one. It's our responsibility to provide, it's the woman's responsibility to nature the family, and make sure the everyone respects and appreciate the dad. At anytime a family can drop a father
@@andrewthegamer4562 that’s on the father than. If you’re willing to protect a woman at the expense of the relationship with your child something is wrong with you. 🤷🏽♀️
@@nijaei because you shouldn’t have to fight in the first place. No man should have to fight for a child that is just as much his as it is the mothers. Also, the family court system is biased against men. Most men would be better off walking away. Most black women don’t see the benefit in having the father around otherwise they wouldn’t push the father away simply because he no longer wants to be with her or they’d pick better men in general. If black women understood the value of marriage their wouldn’t be an 81% baby mama rate in the black community. Mind you 81% of black women have children out of wedlock, of that 81%, 60% have kids by more than one man. Only 16% of black men have kids out of wedlock. 54% are single and childless and 30% of black men are married.
32:39 the cold part about the buying your mom a house trope is that if mom chose better, her man would've secured a house before the son got successful.
The cold part is that you never hear daughters say that they want to buy their father's a house or take care of them. Fathers are always thought of last in these conversations. I noticed that at a very young age, mothers are always getting first love.
@@phenomenal-xv4ey you preaching to the choir homie. I have 6 kids with 2 from a previous marriage. My son's mom called me the other day about him talking reckless to his big sister. After I chastised him and schooled him she added, "your big sister is always there for you and we're all we got. If something happens to me it's just you and your sister." This is while she is on the phone with me cause she needed my help. And to be clear I have my son half the time plus pay child support.
@@karatekoala4270 take your talents elsewhere black man. Women like that aren’t worth the energy. They’re bitter and deserve the loneliness they do desperately fight for.
@@austintaylor979 nah. You just refuse to face the truth..men are useless af. Why have kids then leave them for the mother to take care of??? Then blame the mother for raising the kids single..it makes 0 sense. And YOU know it
$100 shoes for a 7 year old is crazy! This is why our community is where it is financially. They won’t even be in those shoes for 9 months and will trash them in less than 1. Take your butt down to Walmart and get those light up joints for $25. Talking about Dior, that baby has no idea what Dior is.
Im not gonna tell you i dont buy them nice things, but not for $100, we got lucky with sneakers cause my girl got a part time at Finish Line so we get a lot of discounts, but my kids wear what we can afford, we buy them clothes at walmart, and we are bringing them up to like what they like regardless of brand or style, i dont want them worrying about wearing name brand or ehat shoes dropping this weekend.
Naw I'm not going to front bro, while I don't give two shits about designer, I do enjoy working hard and buying my baby girl shoes and clothes..she never ask me for name brand, but I enjoy going shopping for her some nikes then I match up her outfits with little dresses and other things and she loves it...idk that's just me, to each it's own tho...
A lot of kids would be better off with the fathers based off of how a lot of women think. Women feel like they are more “entitled” to the child because they carried the baby for 9 months as if it’s a man’s fault that he can’t carry a baby. 😂
I believe they feel entitled because they know they have power over the situation if the court was more realistic they wouldn’t be taking advantage of the men it will be more of a working it out situation in my opinion
@@DailyRapUpCrewin regards to this whole parental dynamic, when it comes to the judicial system, they operate like this most times than not, with black families, this sh*t is systemic, & black women use this as an advantage for themselves, most times to be vindictive, not for what's in the best interest of the child
@@DailyRapUpCrew facts. But the crazy part is…..the court system is run by men. Most of the judges are male. It goes to show that even men don’t stick together as much as they should.
Took her almost an hr to get there but Shawty in the white top exposed what we already knew, a lot of women want the money and the control that comes along with having primary custody of a child! “I have to do it all on my own” is their mantra to play victim
Love the passion from Jeuu on this one. It straight up doesn't make sense for a man to have a child in the United States. Legally, the kid isn't yours...it's hers.
Exactly, , out of all of these midterm elections, how many of them mentioned anything about father's rights? Yet we've heard about women's rights, lgbt rights, asian rights, but not one of them political parties have whisper anything that benefits father's.
@@edwardgilbert3232 they don’t care about men in the USA. These women will never want the laws to be changed fairly when it comes to family courts and all these false allegations that men be getting.
Those videos of dudes flipping out when they get rejected is not the norm. Most dudes just keep it moving. But women these days can try to embarrass you just cause they see you glance at them.
right..I think thats the part that makes dudes mad..if I approach you respectfully, then reject me respectfully..there aint no reason to make a huge scene out of rejecting someone unless they come at you with disrespect
Most women aren’t going to deliberately try to embarrass a man when rejecting him because they are terrified of how he will react. And even if they were being deliberately rude, or mean that’s no excuse for a man to lash out verbally or emotionally over rejection.
Same for me, but my father just didn’t want to be in my life. Men act as if the mother is always the reason for the father not being in their kids life, but when there is no bad blood between the parents, men still don’t show up.
@@tanitaharris7211this! I’ve seen where the mom was the bitter one who wanted control & also wanted to hurt her ex ( the kids father) BUT it not the case for all of those situation… let’s be honest some are the father being mad & bitter at the mother & taking it out on the kid by not showing up & or not doing their part because they know it will make life harder for the mother or the father just doesn’t care or love the child enough to be active responsible father like they should be.
Where women are disingenuous is they embrace their hypergamy and they expect the man to have more than them and provide/protect. But then they say men should do all those things out of "love". What part of hypergamy is the love component? Marriage is a transaction, men protect/provide and women bear the children, nurture and take care of the house. Love is something that is used by women to get men to do something for nothing or turn them into symps.
@@nijaei *Life happens…,* What happened to her was a result of the choices made. It was not the result of random chance. Giving an excuse for errors instead of taking responsibility is why the community is the way it is today.
If a woman has the nerve to kidnap my child out of my home that is not my friend, that is a person who does not have my child’s best interest, she is an enemy within the group
Women really believe a man is supposed to endure w.e psychological and/ or emotional trauma the mother of his child puts him through just to be in her and the child's life when those same women ALWAYS back a woman leaving a toxic situation. Even if that means abandoning her child. Hell they even justify putting the child through toxic shit just because 'being a single mom is hard'
I tell men to walk away. It’s not worth the headache because you’re fighting a losing battle. The courts aren’t on your side and 9 times out of 10 the mother is gonna give you hell simply because she can. It’s not worth it. Walk away and come back around when the child is 18.
This is why I always tell black men take their talents elsewhere. You have a panel of average at best women demanding bread winners when not one of the exhibit energy worth winning bread for. Hope none of them are allergic to dogs or cats
Crazy thing is the female in the white top talked all this BS about having to do it on her own and admitted she was trying to move from NY to GA taking the child away from the father!
@@Stanley_Fields Chics like her try to move to Atlanta thinking guys are saving chics down here that’s not true at all. I’ve watch many women come here and get disappointed it’s a 20 to 1 ratio.
Being independent is being a adult lol ladies be saying how they cook clean got they own car …. If you want to eat you gonna cook if you want to cook again u gonna do the dishes that’s not independence that being a adult in other words I agree lol
When yall gonna understand you dont get cool points for being an adult... yall be wanting cool points for surviving and doing basic necessities every adult should do ... 😂😂😂 it's just funny to me
@@DailyRapUpCrewWomen usually say this in the response to what do you bring to the table. Just like men often say I take care of my kids as if that’s an accomplishment.
Because there’s a part of them that resents the fact that a man didn’t come along to take care of them. So they’ll be damned before they do something that no one did for them
Y’all hang around some horrible women or chose to create a narrative in your head. Because I see it everyday even on instagram. Y’all just sad bitter cowards looking for someone to blame
SHE IS LITERALLY CONTRADICTING HERSLEF, SHE SAID MONEY IS NEEDED TO RAISE AND CHILD BUT SHE HAS NO MONEY AND HER BABY FATHER HAS MONEY, BUT THE COURT SYSTEM STILL CHOSE HER EVEN THOUGH THEY KNOW AND SHE KNOWS THAT HE IS BETTER THAN HER IN A FINANCIAL ASPECT
I don’t even try to explain to dudes who didn’t have their father, why he wasn’t there. I just wait til’ these dudes have kids themselves, then they see everything. Then you go to them and call them a “deadbeat”, and watch them get furious and explain why that isn’t the case. Then interrupt them and say, “now you know how your dad likely felt”. A lot of your mothers sabotaged your relationship with your father because he didn’t want a relationship with them, but wanted you.
Again zero accountability. They made an amazing point I never in all my life ever heard about women wanting to build anything for their families. They may do something for a daughter but ultimately they’re out here trying to prove to the world they don’t need while at the same time complaining they can’t find good ones
Not all women are like the folks who get on these podcasts. I've been building with my husband for 20 years. Don't get discouraged. There are plenty of down to earth young ladies who are just about the biz. Just gotta find them. 😉
@@tperrien there is not alot, married ppl who’ve been out of the game for over a decade have to stop the foolishness. Most women in more ways than 1 are just like the women on the couch from high to low class.
@@tperrien they interact but they dont participate fully in the dating sphere to truly understand whats going on. They just observe, they dont see it first hand.
did she say women today have higher standards? in a hook-up culture? 80 percent of black babies are had out of wedlock, only 23 percent of black women are getting married. Not to mention the multiple baby daddies. WHAT STANDARDS?
This is to reply to Najae. Men do want to take care of and provide for women but, too often there are women out here who don’t reciprocate let alone show appreciation. There’s just this expectation and nothing more. No thank you, no acknowledgement just give me what I want or require because I expect it.
We have to stop letting women on these shows say "it just didn't work out" when speaking on their child's father. Like get them to explain what that means.
There are less than 20 states where 50/50 custody is the default when it comes to divorce. Most states assume that the child will be better off living solely with the mother even if the father is in a much better position to provide a stable household and even though there are numerous studies indicating single parent households consistently lead to less favorable outcomes (drugs, crime, suicide, etc.) There are also numerous studies that show 50/50 custody is the best situation for kids of divorced parents. The system is rigged against men when it comes to paternity, custody and child support.
The default is the default. The MAN can fight for a different custody situation........You know that right. They dont have to take whatever the court says.....Do men even fight or just shrug their shoulders because they dont want custody anyway......Hmmmm
My aunt got mad at me when I told her that boys/girls are raised better with fathers. Like sis I understand you raised your son but that was no tea no shade. I feel I will raise my daughter great. She gone say I hate women like what.
Many women want a man to lead to until it's time to be led . Many women don't want to be told to to do. When someone is leading you you have to follow which means you have to listen to them
Yes my dad was there for nine years but my mom turn him in for child support because my clothes was too small instead of her just saying hey buy bigger clothes she act like he wasn’t buying clothes at all I was 9 dads have a voice 2
I LOVE how this conversation was going. Didn’t know the Jeuu’s mom was blocking contact with his dad. Can list at least 10 men by name who dealt/ are still dealing with that.. Great job correcting and redirecting the convo.
"We get to just chill?!" 😂😂😂 Naw, beloved. Each role consists of work. Especially in a Caribbean household... Sister or not, my mother drilled it into my head that as a man, I need to know how to cook, clean, do laundry and take care of myself, because it's called being an Adult! Also, my father instilled the value of hard work, and responsibility in me from a young age. You want something; go out there and get it. Where's this easy-going household, she speaks of?! Sounds like paradise...
I thank god even though my mom hated my dad she never kept me away from him. I got to make my own judgment and I do the same for my kids🤷🏾♀️ my dad was never a bum though had me at 16 and still did what needed to be done!
You don’t know that she NEVER kept you away from him all you know is what you remember that’s why it’s important to talk to your father and get his side
@@fuzzylogic6876 what lol my dad has always been in my life and was the one picking me up. He always had a car, took me on trips with him and would of took me to Nigeria if my mom wasn’t scared, now that is one thing I can say she kept me from doing as a child. But sir what r u talking about I’m grown!? r u crazy how r u going to tell me what I need to do and u don’t know me🤔🤔🤔🤔 I clearly said my dad was a teen parent yet he was never a bum. He just got me a car last year🤦🏾♀️ but you also triggered me because what you’re not gonna do is try to tell me my late mother was ever petty and that I would have to get my dad’s side of the story🙄
@@BlameitonKhia my father didn't help out my mom with finances for me and may have been hurt but never let me know any of that. I'm glad I got to see and spend time with my dad. It would've been great to grow up with both parents but I understood that it couldn't happen. That's why I wanted to do better and give my children something I didn't experience which is growing up with two loving parents in a household.
What strikes me most is the likeness “you do the same with your kids” implying you had a failed marriage or relationship like your parents had smh it’s a shame myself included we (blk people) far to often are the products and producers of broken homes and some how this broken nucleus is becoming more and more “normalized”
the strong and independent thing came when they had no responsibility, the minute them bills start hitting and pressure from work comes then its "im tired" dont call us strong
Thanks for speaking up for all the fathers. I have my daughter majority of the time and I’m in court now trying to even get rights to my child. My child mother threatens to take my child from if I don’t agree with her. Father trying to do there best have to go through hell just to be there for ther child or to be great fathers
Right I won't do that shit still on child support I remember a lot of nights where I have to choose between ramen or not being able to afford to eat now my kid is 14 Thanks I've gotten a lot better but that's some bullshit suffering I have to go through just to see her flex with my money on FacebookTrips and restaurants and shit
I knew the girl in the white was bad news when she said we just didn't work out that means she left him because he had no money and now he has a hard time dealing with her
Glad somebody brought up kids, especially little boys, hearing how they ain't shit because of bitterness. Cause that's exactly how it sounds to the kid.
My bm told me my child ain’t welcome over at my house cause I was literally 5-10 mins late for picking her up from after school program. And due to previous Incounters similar like this. I blocked her.(for my mental) And I’ll ask my mom to get my child and I’ll come get her from her house. So zero communication with my bm. Tell me why my BM tell my mom why do I have her blocked (blocked her several times before for being disrespectful and inconsiderate) my child wants to speak to me in the morning before school sometimes. Mind you I only spoke with my child in the morning for like the first two weeks of school. After that she didn’t answer when I called or didn’t call In The morning and I haven’t talked in morning for like a month but now your blocked you want to make sure she speaks to me? “They want control to Men”
Towards the end, I think she has a hard time understanding that most of the time, when the father is not in the picture, it’s because the mother is doing something to make it that way.
I feel the passion from Jeuu going through this as a child and going through this as an adult….😢 the main reason why I don’t wanna ever have any more kids only one…..sadly most people don’t ever try to see the fathers side of it and it’s so tragic…shit hurts so bad bruh
21:15 She's on point with it. That's the dynamic most people should be trying to achieve. My parents have been married for a little under 30 years now and that's what I grew up seeing. They both worked but my mom still came home and cooked. Gender roles were present but they picked up where the other didn't. When she pulled overtime my dad cooked so that was one thing she didn't have to worry about... came home to a cooked meal. He loved to clean and wanted things done a certain way so it was easier for him to do it himself. As far as financially, they went back and forth on who was earning the most but she didn't look down on him when he was earning less. Women looking for only high earners and men who wanna stick to completely rigid gender roles (such as a man should never cook) will have an extremely slim chance of finding someone for them.
So when its time to protect the family in danger while in private or public whos going to do it since you dont believe in rigid unmoving gender roles? Right they all still expect the man to only do that. I’ve noticed that when bills are shared ppl want the womens gender roles to be shared n deligated amongst the household. But as far as the mans roles like proposing on one knee, hard intensive labor, yard work, and protection thats all on him point blank.
@@Babyjoker2222 I understand what you’re saying, but we can’t choose your career for you. There are plenty of men not doing hard labor, their wife isn’t either, yet they still expect to put their feet up while she does everything around the house. My parents just hit 41 years and while they had defined roles, my mom would wash the cars sometimes and my dad preferred to fold clothes since he was better at it (ex military). Yes, you go out and check the house if there’s danger, but she calls the police, checks on the kids (moves them to safety if necessary) and backs you up in the fight if it comes to that. Being on your feet for at least a few hours after work WILL drain anyone. What’s the problem with helping someone you love? Just my perspective💕
@@SCFKASB Yea if his roles of as being the man of the house like going downstairs n being ready to put your life on the line to save / protect his family is put on the women aswell then im all for it but we all know thats not the case. Today's women want you to share their roles all while they want your roles to be only for you. Im not falling for it. Calling the police n then going to run n hide with the children is no where near the level of going out solo to check / engage danger going on in the house. A man's role n what else he brings to the table other than finances is so downplayed n watered down today its ridiculous. All while the women's role of cooking / maintaining the children n house is made to be the toughest job on the planet. Shame aint it
THATS PRETTY MUCH HOW IT GOES IF A MAN IS SEPARATED FROM HIS KID'S AFTER A DIVORCE IF HE CATCHES ALOT OF FLACK FROM THE MOTHER OF HIS KIDS THE GUY USUALLY OPT OUT AND CHOOSES PEACE AND HIS SANITY LET HIS KIDS CATCH UP WITH HIM AFTER THE CHILD SUPPORT IS OVER AND GET HIS SIDE OF THE STORY ....I PROMISE IF THE COURTS WOULD GIVE THE KIDS TO THE FATHER BECAUSE MOST OF THE TIME HE'S THE BREADWINNER I PROMISE U THESE CHICKS WOULD FALL IN LINE OR THINK TWICE ABOUT HAVIN KIDS
Honestly the girl in the middle the whole show especially towards the end showed some of the many reasons why men are not having kids as much anymore, why men are not getting married, why men are not getting into serious relationships, why men are not taking single mothers or women with children seriously for marriage or a serious relationship and why men are not going out and sacrificing for women and helping women with stuff anymore
Realistically woman get custody of the child more often than not, When men want to be a part of the child’s life just as much as the woman, and men are left with more financial responsibilities but less visitation/custody right
I have yet to meet a self made woman...self made broke,bad credit,debt,multiple baby daddy's, I'm divorced with three boys and women reject me as if im going to abandoned my children for skirt
There is no reason to be irritated by someone speaking to you. Add to that a woman being on SOCIAL media and getting mad that someone says hi or gives a compliment. A lot of women speak about curving men as if it turns them on and that isn't normal.
I was listening thru headphones and not watching this episode. I should’ve known the woman I heard talking with sense and logic was the one that’s been married 20yrs. People need to realize in general, whether you’re a man or woman, if you’re trying to be with someone that doesn’t value you and thinks they’re better than you, your relationship experience isn’t going to be good. When two people get together that equally value each other it just works. They figure out their problems because neither one of them wants anyone else.
Here’s a pro tip. If your tired, STOP saying that sht to every man you deal with. I’m strong and independent to a man is like saying I can do it my self and we gon let you do it 🤣🤣🤣
I love this cast however I would appreciate a teen summit so we can prevent having these same conversations. To talk to the youth today to see how we got here is very important. This conversation is going to continue to loop over until we see and understand what the youth today are going through.
Fell on hard times started staying with my mom again I pay half the mortgage my little sister is 28 never moved out and still don’t pay a bill but complain when my mom don’t have extra money for something 🤦🏾♂️ i just think these women facetiously speaking about who has it harder growing up fr
35:00 she summed up majority of these women’s mindset… smh and that’s the mothers fault to teach her how to maintain a home🤷🏾♂️ im teaching my sons how to treat a woman by teaching him chivalry because my dad taught me… I also teach my daughter’s how to be independent but also allow a man to be a man as well. Women have a problem telling men how to be men when clearly a lot haven’t mastered being a woman 🤷🏾♂️ and that’s a quote from my Mother😐
Chick in the middle was a miss all the way through. Nothing but word vomit and moving the goal post in refusal to be viewed in the wrong. She exhibits so much that's wrong with the modern black woman.
Y'all were wasting y'all time trying to explain anything to the Chic in the middle, she thinks her situation applies to everyone and she's a know-it-all but she won't shut up long enough to listen and learn that she doesn't know as much as she thinks, typical modern day female
Women say they want a leader then proceed to try and micromanage the man and criticize him for the decisions and actions he takes to move forward never taking into account that men have to move in a way that women don’t to progress especially if he has to do it with a family because he wasn’t completely established in the beginning. He’s still moving for the family but women think because he doesn’t do what they say or expect he is more of an enemy than actually being an ally.
This was an hour long, felt like 10mins. Shawty at the end was bugging. You shouldn't be able to jump up and take your kid to a different state if your coparenting. That's selfish, and she is entitled. But she'll never self reflect and see that. It's all about perspective and rarely do men get the benefit of there perspective being seen. As a man you supposed to just stfu and do. Having a kid America is trash.
For the hypergamy conversation, men, on average, do not mind women being hypergamous. It has been that way since the dawn of time. What men don't like is being used, especially for their money. Most men who have money have worked hard for it, and usually have a plan for it (investments, retirement, some spendthrift). But the woman has to understand and be in line with the plan. Some women will have no concept of money or the future, and will just spend because it is there, & damn your plan. She wanted a new bag, new shoes, wanted to impress her girls & took them to brunch on your dime, & it causes arguments. She may not understand _"We can't take a vacation this year because this money is for an investment that will help us residually in the future."_ Those type of women will drain you, blame you, and move on to the next man. That is why it is good to observe how they spend (and save) their own money before giving them access to yours. You can be hypergamous, but if you get with me, you have to be on my plan, understand what I'm trying to build, and don't steal bricks from my foundation.
"Why would they give my baby daddy custody?" Thats the problem. It was more than likely that the decision was made swiftly, without a glance at your capability to be a mother, regardless if you're a good mother or not.
16:30 she spoke facts and the true struggle of growing up with both your parents and wanting that for yourself, our people don’t know real togetherness
Advice to women... Work on building a relationship with the man that you enjoy and stop thinking about him "taking care of you". If your daddy didn't take care of you, you really shouldn't expect some man to come in your life and do it just because he likes you. No MAN in his right mind will take care of you AND treat you right if you haven't built with him. Find a man with good qualities and build with him and you'll reap the rewards of what you guys build TOGETHER. Advice to the fellas, stop trickin and leading with money. If your being generous, the first 2 dates should be cheap dates to feel each other out. If you haven't before the 3rd date, make her pay for the 3rd date. She will be willing to pay if she's into you. Discuss her paying for the 3rd date sometime after or during the 2nd date once she gives confirmation that she's interested in you. If she isn't willing to pay, leave her alone.
T.I made a good point as well, he said if one of my sons has a child as a teenager yes it will be upsetting but the child will more than likely be with it’s mother. If my daughter has a child as a teen it affects the whole family because she and the baby will be there and he’s responsible for both of them now.
To the dating up topic. The ladies on this episode said the ladies back in the days dated up. That’s a lie cause they stuck with that man until he got to where he was and most them married they high school sweethearts and then had children cause in the black community back then it was looked down upon to get pregnant out of wedlock
@@Laoriginal718 If a woman gets remarried would you still consider her a single parent? If there’s another parent in the home that isn’t biological is the mother still a single mother? What about father would they be considered single dads if they remarry?
I’m not gone lie, I’m 27yrs old and a lot of men my age that have kids are in they kids lives. They might not be with the baby momma but they DEFINITELY taking care of they kids
