also dhar man is so (unintentionally?) sexist in his plot writing. The emphasis on Karens, the emphasis on representing ‘overbearing’ mothers and chill, cool dads… it always feels so off
@@chloewilliamson668 most women are in 2 categories in dharr videos. Selfish pretty woman and average looking not pretty women. Its definitely sexist to imply that women who enjoy looking good and feeling their best are ALL horrendous people.
Why is dhar man OBSESSED with the idea of monetizing hobbies. This video could've just been about both the parents and kids understanding boundaries. But nope. The kids have gaming jobs and thats the only reason its valid. Not cus its fun or anything
It's because he's a grifter (he was literally sued for $50,000 by the city of Oakland for fraud) whose mind is melted by capitalism, so he can only view the world through making a buck. It's ridiculous how literally every moral in a Dhar Mann video boils down to "You should let your kids play bimeo bames all day because being a Professional Gamer makes lots of money" or "Be nice to minorities because they might secretly be rich and powerful."
dhar mann does this with everything i feel like. he does it with with racism; the message is always “don’t be racist because a black person could be rich and successful” and not “don’t be racist because it’s wrong”
i feel like the lesson shouldve been : give your kids space, but also set up boundaries. for them to get off the game to eat food, with the family, for them to do schoolwork. if they break those rules, assign chores? i guess? im not sure what punishments are acceptable but not abusive. spending time with your family is important, but also having time for your own interests is too. once you breach your kids bubbles, they will hate you :')
My mom took away my smartphone in 9th grade and replaced it with a basic flip (or slide don't remember) phone because my grades were slipping, and she knew I could do better, because I spent so much time on my phone. When my grades went back up, I was already so used to it that I didn't even bother to ask for a new phone until awhile later. Was I upset at first? Sure. But I still had a way to text friends and I had a computer for other social things, although she made sure I didn't spend too much time on that either. I think the way my mom handled it was perfect. For games, there should just be a certain period of time kids can play whenever and however they want. Once that time is over, it's over. Break the rule once, shame. Break the rule twice (in a short period of time), take the games away for like 4 days. Continued rule breakage will increase punishment time. At least, that's how I'd do it. And I think it's the most effective way.
Yeah, it’s all about media balance. Spend an allotted time on family, screentime, books, hobbies, outside with friends. Of course everyone’s media balance will differ, so it’s about finding what works for each to create a healthy balance, and setting boundaries (like no devices at the table).
Yeah the mom was definitely not in the wrong for wanting family time and for her kids to get outside. Where I think she was being unreasonable was in dismissing her kids’ hobbies. Like as a parent, you should care about the things that your kids care about! You don’t have to enjoy it or even understand it, but your kids enjoy things and have hobbies and you should care about that.
Absolutely right. I’m sure there are apps to track that shit too-get chores done and the video game quota becomes available. Set a goal for grades (not necessarily an A!) and you get a new console. Include the parents as well, if mom and dad do their “chores” without forgetting for two weeks, they get a pricey date night or whatever. It’s a group effort and everyone wins. Maybe my family is weird, but setting homework charts with stickers for getting work done early and encouraging my siblings to do the same.
Dhar Mann somehow manages to make every "message" terrible. "If you follow your passion, it always leads to success"? That's a really dangerous mindset, especially if you're an aspiring game developer. Game development is HARD. It's a hard process and a hard field to break into. For every indie darling that launches a franchise there are thousands of games that get zero attention and make minimal profit, and they took just as much work to make. Kids should be taught that you should pursue your passions not because you're guaranteed to make success, but because you want to make sure you live your life without regrets. Take your shot because you can, because you want to, because in twenty years you'll what-if yourself into oblivion if you don't. It would be fantastic to make tons of money and work on a triple-A game and have your Roblox mode take off, but if you can't find satisfaction in the act of creating itself, there's a good chance you'll wind up disappointed. Also, if your family doesn't have the money for monthly subscriptions, maybe don't be a little shit and go download Unity and start doing some tutorials instead of begging for premium server access.
It is a dangerous message. Pursuing your passion can bring personal satisfaction when you finally achieve it, but it doesn't guarantee that others will value your passion and reward you with a giant payday.
There are honestly so many bad messages about game dev in general. What comes to mind is how the extreme crunch and personal sacrifices the Cuphead devs went through to get their project done is often spun into a wholesome message about how "passion will always lead to success". No. It's great that they managed to get their project finished and with such high quality at that but what they put themselves through was not a healthy practise whatsoever, nor was it guaranteed a success just because they put so much into it. As for the monthly subscription thing.. You don't even need realms to run minecraft servers. lol
This message was actually insane. What was the actual moral? Let your children just dictate how you spend your money and use their technology all hours of the day including during dinner because working in video gaming is a valid career path? There was no middle ground as both the kids and mom had valid points and also both acted unreasonably. Dhar Mann definitely has that unreasonable Karen mom stereotype in mind at all times. There was definitely another way of presenting this message, idk it just didn’t sit right with me how one sided it made it.
is the lesson "only let your kids play videogames if they can make money off it."? I'm really confused, because they say it doesn't interfere with schoolwork or chores, so why does it even have to be productive....and how would playing outside be more so??
NGL those kids became hella disrepectful during dinner time. I too would lose it if they just at like "Nah Adult Figure I chose not to listen to you after you let me do what I wanted all day"
@quriguess except she told him to get off and come eat. And he ignored her and went back to playing. The mom had right to take it away after he blantly disrespected her after she's been lenient
I would be disrespectful too if I weren't allowed to eat at my desk where I can have space to enjoy my food, rather I have to squish between my siblings because apparently dinner is the ONLY time you can communicate with family right? Nah the mom character is a complete bitch after a point.
Maybe I was raised wrong but kind of wild how much of the Twitch chat was calling the mom evil for just wanting her kids to eat dinner without bringing tech to the table. Like, it's an unreasonable request to take 30 minutes of their time to sit the fuck down and just eat lol.
Literally the first kid was asking for extra money when his allowance is in a week and her not giving it to him is a negative? The mom is saying they're struggling to pay rent too, it's bizarre how she's portrayed as a villain for being mostly out of touch but justified. The kids are characterized as super inconsiderate and disrespectful the whole video
@@frezling2442 yeah especially at the end when she asked them to not be on the screens during their vacation, like I feel like that's a fair thing to ask
That's all fair, I only have an issue with hating on your kids hobbies so much. Like her kid tried to show her something she was proud of for working on and she got mad about it? Otherwise, yh no issue saying no tech at the table or no more money
The mom was completely reasonable though. She gave them an extra hour after she first asked them to stop. All she wanted was for them to come for dinner and be present at the table without any video games. Not only did the kids not listen, but they were downright disrespectful. The video dropped hints that she was allowing them to make credit card purchases and have all kinds of subscriptions on top of getting allowances and they won't even have dinner with her? Also the portrayal of video game playing as all strictly for real-world job skills and to improve in math was such a ridiculously dishonest way to try and make the mom look unreasonable.
I completely agree. The video made the mom seem like the villain, even though she was completely in the right. As a teenager who used to be like the aforementioned children in the video, I know that the children are just acting immature and being addicted (although I think the daughter should be able to call her friends, and minor stuff such as that)
Also a lot of the videos Dhar Mann makes rely on the parents telling the kids that if they win something they receive an award, instead of rewarding them for trying.
@@unbacked7253 i agree with most yet there was no attempt at giving the children the tools to be able to balance things like school, family time and their hobbies. coming from experience i was like this as a kid because i was always treated like this (and worse by my parent and others) when a child is continually told that what they care about or that they simply would like to express happiness in their hobby you tend to stop trying and block people out. i know this is a DM video so i don’t expect much but if you’ve got a parent who is continually shutting down your dreams, hobby or an sort of conversation why is that child going to bother with you when they feel listened to by other means? your second comment was spot on :) edit: i also experienced the same things with my emotions. when given no way to communicate with my parent, i had emotional cry’s for help that were shunned as me being “immature”. i was a child and had never been taught how to for allowed to ask for help. things like “addiction” also fall into this. the parents should question why they’re children might be. are they lonely, do they feel like they can’t come to me? instead of being abrasive and ultimately pushing the child away even further.
I kinda feel like Dhar Mann was trying to hard to pander to kids with this one? The mom wasn't even being unreasonable. And it's SUPER easy to write a mom being too hard on kids about playing video games! But "we don't have the money to buy tons of Robux for you all the time" and "get sunlight and fresh air every now and then" are far from insane statements (though she was too harsh about it).
I feel like there was a reasonable point living inside a comically unreasonable woman. And your honestly the way she's written she basically hates her kids
@@michaelwilliams8242 she was very reasonable the children were so disrespectful and led her to the decision she made. she gave them extra time and pays for a bunch of Subscriptions for them even though money is tight but they couldn’t sit down and eat dinner with her
@@stessymwadime587 her overall point was reasonable, but you can't communicate with your kids by berating them and calling all of their interests a waste of time.
Yeah, they had the opportunity to make both sides look good and make a message about balancing a family life with personal activities in a way that isn't hard to do. Make the kids love gaming, but spends to much time playing while actually be respectful of their parents. Make the mom want to spend more time with the family and outside, but goes too far into making them do so. They come together to understand each other and the kids learn to do other things in life that aren't in front of a screen and the mom learns about why her kids enjoy gaming and being more lenient on them for it.
@@Algebruh2407 I honestly think that would've been more valuable to both, ESPECIALLY to parents. It's more realistic for a kid to NOT become the next big rich and famous streamer- but they still deserve to enjoy their hobbies. Parents are more likely to be swayed by something like that then "well maybe they'll just happen to get lucky and become rich and famous," plus, it would help them find a way to reach out to their kids without putting them down.
I really hate this sketch. There's no healthy middle ground. The kids really do need to spend SOME time outside and in person with their friends. It's definitely important for them to respect their parents and maybe only pull from their allowance to pay for things and schedule times to go for walks and meet up with friends? Their mom was clearly belittling their hobbies, ignoring what they're passionate about, and refusing to sit down and talk about her concerns calmly, but she's not wrong to want them to do more than one thing, though the kids mentioned doing all their homework and chores beforehand. I dunno, the whole thing rubs me the wrong way
the thing is even when the one kid asked for something to be taken out of his allowance she just denied it so rudely also for me personally I spent so much time with my friends just being in school, we often didn't hang out otherwise for weeks, sometimes months, because we were already constantly hanging out between and during classes
they’re already low on money and he can just wait a week, she may have been a bit rude but it was completely justified. She doesn’t have to be giving him any money for video games, especially when it’s so tight
The kid gets an allowance but he’s still bugging her for extra cash?! Especially when money is apparently tight … I grew up in a low income household, where money was usually tight, and I never ever got a regular scheduled allowance! I remember requesting one a few times, my parents said they just couldn’t afford it, and also that I shouldn’t be paid to do chores around the house that I live in 😅 Though, not saying this fictional kid isn’t allowed to ever ask for extra money …. But I did feel less bad for him once I heard he gets an allowance. Like dude just wait and use your allowance for robux. Also this comment is far too long, I’m thinking far too deeply about a Dhar Mann video 🤣 Edit/addition - the second kid requesting his thing be taken out of his already scheduled allowance is a perfectly reasonable request tho! On the kids side there
How low of an income could they have if they're living in a house that big, decked out with that much expensive hardware, and talking about hawaii trips? This seems more like an upper-middle class household that has trouble downsizing their QoL.
@@TikiShades also a very fair point! They’ve got a nice house, saving for trips, giving all 3 children allowances. Raising children is already expensive even if you don’t give the kids spending money.
Same! I was more lower-middle class with a single mom and multiple siblings and none of us ever got an allowance, if we wanted something we’d beg mom for it for a birthday or Christmas the way god intended lol
I agree, especially w a lot of the additions. But I was baffled about the kids having an allowance. I def was in a middle class family but an allowance?? No way. Still baffled that other people grew up with that lol
About the "taking it out of allowance" thing That is, generally speaking, a children's tactic/trick to get what they want... you sacrifice some of your allowance now but later complain that your allowance is too small or you don't have enough for some thing so you ask your parent(s) for money for the thing or a raise in allowance (maybe claim you'll take on more responsibility in exchange for the allowance increase)
It's so obvious that the reason he pushes this "actually devices are great" stuff is because he really wants kids to keep watching his stuff. They're his revenue stream.
Ooof, this one got me. That mom seems incredibly sad and lonely. An unsupportive partner and kids who couldn't be bothered to spend a meal talking to her about a topic she understands. She probably just wants to spend time with her family for half an hour and everyone is telling her that her feelings are completely unreasonable because "KiDs jUsT wAnT tO HaVe FuN!" Cool, I get that too, but maybe also respect the rules set in place for you? Actions have consequences. A lesson every kid should learn. And now...this poor woman is going to have dinner alone every night because her husband doesn't come home until late and her kids are gaming. Cool cool cool. Love the moral of this story. Edit: spelling & grammar
Literally. It's so sad, and the message Dhar Mann gave was that it was totally okay. I understand that somethings she did were a bit overboard, but she did give her kids many warnings and they just continuously ignored her.
@@lolibbie Cause they act like spoiled little brats...The minute they dont get their exacly what they want, they run away or start complaining. Its very normal to put your device away for a second when your mom ( who cooked you a full meal btw ) asks you to, and their reaction was just not ok. Also as a partner the dad should be on the moms side...
@@kasperwithanak3853 partners do not always have to be on the same side, and while the kids did a very poor job of advocating for themselves, and acted somewhat bratty, there was at least a small point about actually listening to your children when they talk to you, rather than completely dismissing their passions because you don’t see the value in it.
The mom has all the power in the situation and no empathy for her children. She’s using her stress about their financial troubles as an excuse to just get mad at her children for doing things they enjoy. If she wants to relate to her kids, then she should make the minimum effort to care about their interests and be an adult.
The mom was very reasonable, her kids were being very disrespectful. Maybe she was a bit intense but if this is a common occurrence in the house that explains it
@@placeholderdoe Yeah you know how Dhar Mann studios seem to write some of their scenerios as if they’ve never actually experienced it? Yeaaaahh… this one feels like the opposite applies just a bit too much
It's reasonable to want your children to moderate their use of technology, and to want them to not use it at the dinner table. It's NOT reasonable to be dismissive of your children's interests and to treat them like they're not worthwhile.
Yeah nah the mom wasn’t even in the wrong 💀 like those kids were being mad disrespectful. I mean good lord. They were just completely disregarding everything she was saying while also demanding she respect their interests.
Coming back to this again to say that these kids are full on spoiled brats for all asking for more more more when their parents can barely make ends meet. Dhar did a terrible job making the kids into the sympathetic party here lol. Like no wonder the mom doesn’t like tech when her kids completely ignore her in favor of gaming. The plot line of jerk parent doesn’t support kids’ interests is such a low hanging fruit and this video still instead spent several minutes reaching for it only to miss and grab a pine cone instead.
How could they get this plotline wrong when is so damn easy?? literally theres millons of jokes of like "it must be that damn phone" for a reason lmao Maybe if they had focused more on how the mom was disregarding their interest and forcing them to spend their free time outside even tho they did they chores and homework, which DID happend in the video but the kids actitude pretty much opaqued that (sorry for weird english)
@@TakkuriHimare My parent literally destroyed my device with a hammer because I went from 90 to 78 maybe I should just give them script ideas, it would be charity
Also I feel like the mom was a little bit of a straw man of why moms complain about video games. As a teacher when I see conflict about kids being on games it's 100% because the kid is letting it take over other parts of their lives like playing games instead of school.
I think that kids should not have school outside of school. It has been demonstrated in several places that not having homework, or having very little, is better for kids. I can't get behind the message
@@justsierraok I agree. My school doesn't assign after school homework but I teach online so sometimes kids play video games while they are in zoom class or they miss zoom class because they're playing video games. So.
I think it can be coping, though. Having something to think about at school can be a gift to kids with bad social lives (for example: almost anyone during middle school)
As a mom myself I have had these conversations with my kids before. I don't really like how they are making her the bad guy for trying to be a good mom. Plus she isn't even mean. Being a mom is unbelievably hard!! I know I have sounded way more mean then her. It's ok for the kids to be on it but not all the time. It's a parents job to try to make sure kids are well rounded.
Don't worry, i don't think many people other than children really agree with the video, judging by the comments. I'm 19, not a dad, not even close to it. I'm closer to the kids actually, and i see nothing wrong with the boundaries set by her. She just wanted to eat dinner without tech, and that the kids go outside and play and meet other kids sometimes. Isn't like she's never letting them use their stuff, it's just that their REALLY addicted to it, and that's A PROBLEM!
I just think the mom went about it in a very rude manner, the way she had such extreme disregard for her own children's interests would destroy their relationship
"she isn't even mean" meanwhile she literally trashing on their interests and dreams and even getting mad at her daughter for using her friend's ipad at school
Ma’am if you watched this video and found the way she treated her kids to be reasonable and not extremely mean, cruel, and petty, then don’t be surprised when your own kids would rather be on screens than spend time with you.
i love these vods. i watch them as soon as they are put up and rewatch them constantly as background noise. i'm starting to experience side effects though... last night my dream took place in the dhar mann universe... the lesson was very morally ambiguous...
@Safwaan i was being bullied in the dhar mann highschool for being gay if i remember correctly, i think the bully ended up being gay too and it was about internalized homophobia..? he ended up being the hero and i was so pissed i woke up
I feel like a lot of people (including the video itself, in true Dhar Mann fashion) are conflating "mom has zero interest in understanding her kids' hobbies" and "mom doesn't want her kids to be terminally online" and acting as if both are Bad when uh, the latter is a completely valid concern lol.
Nothing wrong with being "terminally online" and to imply otherwise can be pretty ableist. Not everyone can go "touch grass" or whatnot. Some people can't leave their house because of disability and primarily socialize via social media. Sometimes, the only place to find real, supportive friends is online. Sometimes being online helps kids identify when they're being abused. The internet isn't inherently bad and someone's offline environment isn't inherently good. I hope this makes sense Edit for clarity
@@TayDoesStuff oh please 🙄 speaking of terminally online… As a disabled person, we are perfectly capable of going outside and being social if we want to. Stop being weird.
@@PhoenixRoseYT As a disabled person, I want to remind you that you don't speak for all disabled people. You don't know the lived experience of every single person with every single disability.
@@TayDoesStuff It can bad if you're physically able to do other things and yet still stay online all the time. If they said "being online all the time is bad and there's no excuses" I'd understand your comment. But they didn't.
@@TayDoesStuff Can we not pull the 'ableism' card please? Yes, being terminally online is bad. Being unable to socialize off the internet due to no other reason than the fact that you spent your entire upbringing glued to the internet isn't healthy. I'm 'terminally online' and it sucks, I'm just not in a position where I am able to do anything about it. But if I could, I would gladly change my lifestyle. That's why I understand the concern of parents with kids *choosing* that sort of lifestyle. It's not a good one to have, and if a child is pursuing that sort of lifestyle without acknowledging any of the problems, I have a problem with that As someone who actually is disabled and forced into this lifestyle, the absolute last thing i want to hear is my existence being used as an arguing chip to shut someone up for saying 'its valid for moms to be concerned that their kids are choosing to be terminally online' by implying they somehow were lumping disabled people into that. You don't speak for all disabled people either. This is not a life I am thriving in. This is not a life I would wish for anyone. And I don't want kids enabled into CHOOSING this sort of life because you are trying to play the 'ableism' card to shut down an argument you, yourself, put into ops mouth in the first place
so like, as an aspiring game developer, I get what he was going for, but this idea that some kids will be able to make a living like this is a dangerously unrealistic expectation to set for their viewers. I mean hell endorsing Roblox alone is pretty bad taste given how shit they are towards underage developers. And on top of that the idea that he won the minecraft contest because he was the most passionate, as if the rest of the kids participating weren't passionate about their dreams? I guess passion only translates to success if you're on camera. Not to mention that there's more to game development than just playing games all the time. And then they just magically create a professional quality game straight out of college (or high school?) and are able to sell it for millions right away? I feel like this 'lesson' both trivializes game development as a career and makes it look like parents should never judge their children for wasting their time, as if there is nothing more to learning game development than playing tons of games.
EVERY Dhar Mann video has some diluted, shallow, or unrealistic "moral". These are supposed to be feel good stories, it won't do you well to expect realistic outcomes. LOL
Imo it is not healthy that we ( and i say we, as a zoomer who also experences this) are exposed to this culture of "hey its ok to be glued to the screen and making money by basically consuming a piece of entertainment media is a normal and reasonable career path :)" and seeing people our age quitting education/not looking for a job and beaing succesful with it. Getting it into your head that it's ok to destroy your ability to function without hours of screentime is not a net positive.
she was being reasonable about the money because they can't afford it but saying stuff like "that doesn't count" when she said she went outside on her tablet was definitely unreasonable
@@lemqnsharkno it isn't? She wanted them to get exercise and vitamin D, that was not unreasonable. Any good parent wants you to go outside for some time unless you live in a dangerous area.
Dharr Mann either has mommy issues, or he grew up in a family like mine with a super controlling, screaming mother, that criticised everything the kids liked, and a pretty chill, nice dad, that encourages you to follow your passions. And he thinks all families are like that.
Which is wrong and sexist for sure, but I mean Dharr Mann has so many tropes, it feels like the world is only from his point of view, to the point that you can make it into a bingo game.
why were the parents planning a trip to hawaii if they were struggling financially?? that would be the LAST thing you would do when you cant make rent wth
They have a big house, giving kids allowance and allowing their subscriptions, food on the table...... It's very hard to believe their actually struggling and if they are they need to revamp how they're going about things and maybe downsize to a home they can afford. Also, they had enough money to adopt at least two kids, because why are they all the same age?
Is there a bingo square for "WHO raised my kids to be so terrible" because every single parent-child video this guy makes is just "my children are little terrors who don't listen to me and act up in ways I hate, how did it come to this?" like they just got the kids yesterday. Like "our kids are so hooked on the devices we bought them that they interact with without my supervision or any boundaries because I don't care about all this tech stuff and the subscriptions we continue to pay even though we can't afford them >:(" like that sounds like a problem that did not originate with your triplets here, ma'am.
Thank you! So many people in the comments hating on the kids, like how did those kids become addicted to the devices in the first place? How did they get all the subscriptions? Cuz I'm damn sure they didn't buy em themselves! And I do feel for the mom being worried about the kids, but damn, couldn't she think ahead when getting her kids all the electronics? Couldn't she inform herself about healthy internet use and teach her kids that in time? Then she blows up at them when they're addicted and belittles their interests. She completely dropped the ball on that one.
To be honest, I really am more on the mom’s side here. It’s perfectly reasonable to want to have no electronics at the table (and come on, who plays music at a family dinner time??? That’s for talking to each other, you don’t need a soundtrack.) I also really think that her worries about financial restraints is also very valid. If you’re barely making rent, buying robux isn’t a sound decision (not to mention how crappy and predatory Roblox’s currency system and underage dev system is) Me and my brother are both gamers, and my mom is not- we have a similar setup to the family in the video in that regard. We used to be banned from talking about Pokémon at the dinner table because we wouldn’t shut up about it lol. But it’s really important to set up boundaries for these things, at least at the beginning until children understand how to balance things. Things like screen time limits are absolutely necessary until the kids learns how to self balance video game time and family time. My brother and I used to have an hour of video game time every day after school, and because we only had one system, one of us would usually sit a session out to allow the other to beat a level that day. It allowed for us to negotiate with each other who got the time and it gave an opportunity for the one not playing to read a book or engage in a hobby. Now that we’re older, we have more systems and no time limit, but we know how to regulate ourselves. We know when to stop and when it’s appropriate to start a game or have an electronic. It’s also crazy to me how much credit card access these kids expect. Not to sound old but back in my day you played the free pixie hollow online and didn’t even think of touching a credit card to a game site. Normalizing spending money on games like this really opens up kids to gatcha game traps in my opinion. They need to know when to hold back. This got long but this video really bothered me lol.
Even tho I hate the outside I sided with mom too in theory as bills dictate whether you even have a home so the kids being so insensitive to that until "making it" is insane. They could've learned to curb their addiction while setting time to "work" as that is an important lesson, burn out is a thing. Why mom was letting them have CC access is also insane tho, she needs to learn better money management on top of listening to her kids' obvious career choice and how to manage it as they were literally working.
I think for me it’s the way she doesn’t even try to learn what they’re interested in. I think just trying to take part in your kids interest or learning about them is important, and it’s also not impossible. When I first met my fiancée’s parents- her dad was watching anime with her little brother. Did he like it? No not really. But he watched a couple episodes with him to make him happy.
I'm with you. My parents definitely expected my sister and I to balance school and play time, and we didn't actually get an allowance (or cc access lol), but if we wanted to earn money then my mom would offer to pay us if we did some small jobs for her (she had her own business). At the same time, my parents tried really hard to show interest in our hobbies and passions. Did they get it all the time? No, but they didn't just shut us down either. Like, parenting does involve a little give and take. You set the ground rules and make sure your kids understand them, but don't be an ogre about it either, they're your kids show them you love them! DM really just wanted those "lol check out this Karen!" clicks
I love how parents compare their children like pokemon cards and then act like they have been stabbed in the back by their children when *they* compare them to other parents
As someone painfully addicted to electronics the last thing we need is dhar tryna rationalize it lol. Could be a lot worse but it’s a legitimate issue. I feel like it’s gotta be a major contributor to the higher depression levels but I have no proof whatsoever lol
@@tuffy135ify its fine to not be supportive of their hobby turning into a career but she wants them to socialize with her at dinner but she made a lot of disparaging comments about their favorite hobby that would most likely be what they talk about. She is right to want to eat dinner with them and have them spend less screen time obviously
I feel like this episode is saying like “hey kids disobey your parents because you’re right and they’re wrong” essentially. If kids watch this and believe that their parents will always be in the wrong I feel like it’s harmful.
Kids are clearly addicted to their electronics and were also insensitive to how bills worked but Mom also is bad at money to even allow so many subscriptions in the 1st place and listening to what her kids are actually doing. I don't know how Dhar Mann achieved it but he made a simple AF lesson dumb and weird.
I must be old because I was 100% with the mom. Kids are out here demanding more money when they're struggling, disrespecting their mom, not helping her because they're on their tablet. She was way more patient than my mom would have been.
not to mention that they only magically won the minecraft contest cause I guess they had the most 'passion' to follow their dreams. In a realistic scenario they wouldn't win, but that also doesn't mean they're not destined to be game developers. It's almost like there's more to making games than just playing lots of games. This writing is just a mess.
@@BlazeMakesGames Yeah, it's not a great message in that regard. Also, they really are dependent on constant screen time in a way that would concern any parent. They freaked out at the prospect of having to have a family dinner without any devices.
Have you considered that gaming is as much of a hobby and way to spend time as laterally anything else? Like, ignoring everything else, you CANNOT disrespect your kid's interests and hobbies and expect complete kindness in return.
@@zzeroara9511 no that's fine, but they should still at the very least stop playing for dinner, its not like they are being forced to quit gaming forever or something. That being said, it was a little too much when she said that they couldn't have screens for the rest of the school year.
@zzeroara dude, chill out lol. If my mom told me to do something when I was playing piano, reading a book, or going outside and I didn't do it, it doesn't matter that that was a "productive hobby" she would have still kicked my ass. Its obvious that you're either 12 or haven't been disciplined enough. You *never* disrespect your parents unless it's obvious they don't have your best interests at heart. Grow up.
"Can I eat at my computer while I work" kid is already living in silicon valley working 16 hours a day, 7 days a week and not interacting with any humans who aren't also devs Cool message Dhar 👍🏻
I hate how it takes the actually decent message of "You should go outside sometimes, it's good," puts it in the mouth of the villain, and makes it seem unreasonable by making her a boomer who doesn't understand anything about electronics.
I thought the bigger message was going to be, it's okay to listen to your kids interest and here's how to set good boundaries. It would have been real easy to have the dad be the voice of reason there and how to mom come around a bit. Too many parents are just dismissive of their kids and don't think they are worth listening too/only want their side heard. It would have been good, to have the mom reverse no electronics until after school and instead set a schedule where they can be on them and maybe make them use their allowance to pay for the subscriptions, like one of the kids said. They aren't gonna like it at first, but eventually they'll come around. The whole message is just thrown in the garbage by having the kids win the contest and even get to dangerous territory. They should have had them lose, but the mom comes around anyway and set these boundaries.
I have so many feelings about this one. I have 3 kids and it's so frustrating when they don't listen, so I absolutely understand her reaction. But the kids are also fairly reasonable, they said they did their homework and chores before playing. Yes, they should respect the dinner time rules, but taking away electronics for months seems excessive. And putting down your child's passions is wrong. There's a lot to this video and I don't know how to think. 😅
I think people are just really bothered by the mom's portrayal. As far as the video is concerned she's a crazy controlling shrew who hates technology. I'm definitely more on her side but I think people are defending her more because the video just went so hard against her.
I feel like her getting mad at the daughter for using a friend's tablet was also kinda unreasonable, bc u cant really control another kids electrics n its not like she was takin it home.
Here’s my thought on the sexism debate (I am a woman btw): on dhar Mann bingo we’re calling out character’s sexism, stuff inside the story, as opposed to Dhar Mann’s sexism. Yes, there is sexism, but that’s on Dhar Mann himself, the script writer
You know, this was similar to my relationship with my parents regarding electronics and it was frustrating to me as a kid. Seeing it in such a caricatured light makes me kind of empathize with parents (at least mine) Technical advancement has come on so rapidly in the last couple of decades that it poses new challenges for us frequently, and unfortunately it has left many older family members in the dust. It probably feels hard to connect, like things have changed so much that it is impossible to relate to your child. That being said I do think that speaking to your child in such a disparaging way is harmful to them. At the very least it sows deep seeds of frustration and bitterness.
Nah man, I’m with the mum 100%. As someone who was referred to a tech addiction clinic by an adhd consultant, I can tell you it can actually be a huge problem that worsens depression, anxiety, and adhd symptoms… these kids can’t even go a meal without tech 😩
Dude, if my dad came home and we complained that my mom wouldn't let us play video games, he would just turn around, go to the basement, and switch off all the electricity to the entire house except the kitchen(because the fridge). Honestly, I wouldn't even be mad.
The actor who plays the father has been so specifically typecast as, "Guy who's kind of failing/not involved enough as a father/husband." Not as much in this video, but in general. You should support your partner and share the not fun punishment parts of the job. Idk, co parenting seems hard. I honestly think this would be difficult to deal with as a parent. Especially as someone who's pretty tech addicted myself and would want to shield my kid while also sharing the benefits of tech with them. But also, I would be psyched if my kids were this creative. Idk. My takeaway from all this is parenting is hard and this is why I have dogs. Who are always on their damn ipads.
Holy hell, for some reason while the mother was lecturing the kids about how much money the spend on games and things I got this legit pit in the bottom of my stomach and *so much anxiety* like an emotional flashback. Maybe it was the topic of 'your hobbies are worthless' or just the tone but DAMN.
@@hanifakamarake513 Absolutely it was reasonable (more than that it was RESPONSIBLE) of her to say no to the requests for more money. I was more talking about my own, personal, emotional response to the tone she used in one scene
@@hanifakamarake513 I think y'all are forgetting that intention and reason is not all that matters. If you wanna make someone listen and understand you, maybe don't belittle their interests and hobbies, regardless of if your reasoning is valid. Of course they aren't going to listen no matter if you're technically right or not, if you're being rude about it tf 😂. Also, maybe they should not they about the financial except of adopting three kids, before adopting said kids. At least I'm assuming at least two are adopted because all three are the same age and one looks like a difference race, but I'm face blind so that could just be me. I honestly had to check the title in the first 10 minutes or so, because I genuinely was on the mom's side, but as it video went on both the kids and the mom's gave valid points and both were disrespectful and stubborn to a degree. They needed a healthy communication line and for the mom to be a bit more open minded to be able to set healthy boundaries with her kids instead of being so dismissive creating even more resentment. That's why the message of the video threw me way off track. She def was not the bad guy they tried to gaslight us into believing she was, but I also disagree with the comments saying she was completely in the right.
@@blueismylove3128 u need discipline man, obviously she could have shown interest but they arent being respectful, u sound like an angsty teen in every comment
@@valehuber2232 Or I sound like a reason person who know when someone's a bad mother. I sound like an angsty teen because I acknowledged both parties are wrong and can do better? Literally fuck off.
When they started touting the benefits of the tablet to help their daughter improve her math score, it reminded me of that shameless Word Farm Adventure video that spoofs Dhar Mann's morality by making the App responsible for ending racism.
I do not go outside enough and didn't as a kid, I never understood parents like that. But my mom ALSO thought going outside sucks. There's so many bugs. Maybe if I had like a net or something but no. Sitting by the window and looking out is good for your brain too. It's the idea of looking at the sun that really gets the brain to get that good juice sometimes.
The mom’s concerns were valid, she wanted her kids to go outside and it’s 100% reasonable to not want electronics at the dinner table and actually socialize with her family. The kids were also snotty. Like, why can’t you use your allowance to buy your own robux instead of asking for extra money. But she could have explained it better, like sitting the family down to calmly talk about her concerns and set boundaries. The kids are allowed to have their hobbies, especially if they’re academically responsible and are being productive.
The funny part about the “you will achieve your dreams if you are passionate about them” is that the dad didn’t get his promotion so it means that he Isn’t passionate enough about his job
I’m not video game person, but I do think these parents should respect their kids interests. I also think the mom is right to not want the kids playing video games for like eight hours straight. What she should’ve done is set boundaries and implemented brakes as well as dinner or lunch always be with the family and no device. At this time, the mom should instead take the time to learn about their interests and video games. It’s just about balance and respecting your kids as their own human beings. It’s so weird how some parents really think that they know everything with no valid evidence or credit🤷🏻♀️
LOL she told them to go to dinner and even gave them an extra hour to play and they were still on it and refuse to leave and was disrespectful as hell. Granted she could be more open minded and stuff but reality is the whole "if you just follow your passion, you'll always succeed" is naive as hell. Out of 100 ppl chasing dreams, only a fraction made it. Parents onyl know what they know and these kids kinda piss their mom 0ff with their disrespectful attitude. You can let kids have their interests but also give them more than one path to success and it's also important for kids to have boundaries as well. Playing non stop for hours and eat at the computer really isn't healthy either. Even actual working adult needs to have a balanced work hours. This is a classic problematic lesson. Like the "lesson" is for the mom to "bite her tongue" LOL wtf... Like try to see it from the parents perspective as well. They're just worried about their kids future and they're from a generation that didn't have the luxury to make a living playing video games...Parents are just human struggling to do their best. There are parents who go overboard but this lady isn't even that bad. Respect is a 2 way street.
I would like to point the parents don’t try to understand their kids. A lot of the time the reasons kids are so attached to devices is due to something they aren’t receiving as a coping mechanism. I remember many times my parents took away my lap top (even tho I got all my stuff down) and the reason I was on it so much was because I was deeply suicidal and playing games online with friends was one of the only coping mechanisms I had
I feel like anybody who has young kids in 2022 is young enough to know that video games are an actually career path lol. Even my grandma wouldn't be this mad 😂
It's an awful career path. Crunch overworking people, entire studios fired as soon as a game finishes before launch so the production company doesn't have to pay the workers, EA harassment issues(along with other companies), and so many more issues affecting the workers.
Video games can be a career path but only for the extra lucky fews. Meanwhile, addiction to you computer/phone/video games has serious repercussions on your sleeping pattern, social life, school results, and even cognitive development. The mom is actually right, her kids are young and already looks terminally online, to the point where they can't even stop playing to have lunch.
Having someone else make all your food and pay your bills is super underrated. As a mother gamer I have to make food for others and myself and THEN work on my game tester training. It's very inconvenient lmao
this video is peak dhar mann in terms of engineering a situation to prove a point so simplistic that it’s basically useless. the mom is in the wrong because she isn’t responding when her kids reach out and try to share their interests with her. the kids are in the wrong for completely ignoring the boundaries their mom is setting, plus she’s clearly under a lot of financial stress and the way she acts suggests it’s been a while and she’s just at her limit and tbh i don’t understand the kids in this video at all… if my mom told me we couldn’t afford something when i was that age or even just that she didn’t want to spend money on something? that’s something kids CAN understand and parents should be able to set those limits.
I felt more sorry for the mother than the kids the whole time. The kids were actually addicted to their gaming and didn't give a fuck about anything else really. They don't listen to her when there is genuine reasons that they should take a break (like having dinner) and bugs her for more money to fund the addiction while they are getting an allowance. She gets annoyed with them and takes away their devices in a way that was more fair than they tried depicting it. They then get pissed at her and act up in a way that would definitely result in an ass whopping in most households around the world. Then her wet paper bag of a husband who didn't want to get involved in the slightest then says that they should compromise in a way that doesn't really help. One of the three kids proved that they can make a relatively small amount of money in a one off competition and now she must just accept that she shouldn't do anything if they spend all day sitting on the couch playing Minecraft or Roblox just in case it is beneficial to them.
I had a mom that was just like that- and all it did was make me unable to properly manage my time when it comes to video games because I was always trying to get as much time in before she irrationally took them all away again. I didn't thank her, because like this mom, instead of trying to relate or learn what I was doing, she just reacted blindly and angrily at things she didn't understand. At least when I got to the point where I was actually able to actually show her code I had written, she backed off a little, but that wasn't until my late teens.
these kids already can’t manage time. the mom gave them an extra hour which she honestly didn’t need to do and the kids still didn’t wrap up what they were doing and then complained when their mom wanted to eat dinner with them
My best friend growing up was obsessed with playing RuneScape back in the day, his parents were so unbelievably strict with the internet and pretty much banned them from using the computer or they would smack them for gaming or just unplug and take the computer. This leads to serious problems down the line, every time we would hangout or he would come over he would just be obsessed to game for the little amount of time he was away from him parents and ignore me and other friends. So much wasted time I wish I could have back now, I just wanted to hangout with my friend but couldn’t because he was so sucked into the game at the time because he was told no by his parents. His brother also developed a terrible addiction to gaming and I swear I would only see him rage quitting when I would visit. What I’m saying is the parents directly caused this, if they could’ve just allowed them to play for like an hour or settled on an agreement I guarantee you he wouldn’t have wasted our time together and also developed an obsession. I guess what I’m saying is you often want what you can’t have, and gaming to kids can be their entire world. Also I just want to mention that these kids I grew up with were extremely active, I was always playing outside with them most of the day. So it’s not like we were shut ins and they had a reason to ban video games in their house haha. It’s just extremely ironic to me that the parents who try and force their kids into not doing something often push that kid into the exact thing they wanted them to avoid!
'let your kids spend every waking hour playing video games so that one day they can pay off your mortgage' WHAT it should be like 'its ok to let your kids play video games/use technology, just teach them the right balance' like tbh i don't think the mom was in the wrong here, she just went about things the wrong way. with money being tight she should've had a conversation with the kids about setting limits on how much they could play/how much they could spend, and explain that she wants them to spend at least a certain amount of time outdoors/getting exercise each day. also she should definitely be warning them to be careful on discord
as someone who is a QA tester in gaming: this child has unreasonably mature expectations. Most QA engineers I know either have aspirations of advancing to production roles or do QA for money while pursuing personal, risky game projects on the side. Also unrealistic in that after a long day of QA I am so, so ready to put down the game where I've been rubbing up against objects at slightly different angles to repro a single bug to eat some goddamn pasta
Big concern: nobody taught these children about taxes, so do they know how much they actually get to keep of this buyout money? Next video will be about them mistreating a minimum wage server at their parents’ favorite restaurant, going broke as soon as they file their taxes, learning from past mistakes, and getting jobs as servers and being mistreated by rich tech customers. A “shoe on the other foot” storyline.
the arguing over electronics and jarvis yelling at chat that it's not spaghetti happening at the same time is so funny [incoherent arguing] "ITS NOT SPAGHETTI"
mine used to take my phone, hygiene products, and even my door for blinking (she said i was rolling my eyes when i wasn’t) so i know how much it sucks 😔
I feel like she's the type of mom to say her kids need to spend time with their friends in real life, and then when they ask if they can hang out with their friends she says no and gives them a lot of chores to do
I actually like this episode a lot. The mom isn't really unreasonable--she just wants the best for her kids-and the episode knows that. But the kids have their hobbies and she learns to respect that. An actually kind of nuanced portrayal of a family dynamic in a Dhar Mann video??? Color me shocked
"Playing video games isn't going to take you anywhere" "I don't need to go anywhere, I'm happy in this moment, where I am now." - kids everywhere making Buddha proud
Glad that the mom is being supported in the comments. I hate how the video tried to make her seem unreasonable. She definitely wasn't being rational, but she's still understandable.
They’re not even ignoring homework or anything, she’s just like “go outside to waste time!” I could at least understand it if they were shirking school assignments or something but that’s their free time, mom. They earned that.
Tbf that’s because dhar wanted to write the kids right. If it was real the kids would’ve done none of it lmao, someone brought up dhars only writing these because those kids are his entire revenue stream. Pretty messed lol
It's understandable that the mom wanted them to put stuff down for dinner, then they could have gone right back on their game. I don't think it would have killed the daughter to set her game down for a moment to help the mom either.
ngl the one w the mom drove me wild bc she kept talking about how she didnt understand and then ignored the kid whenever he tried to tell her about it :-(
I do agree, kids need a break from screens, pressuring your passions can be amazing! But it doesn’t always pay off, and you aren’t guaranteed to make money,
Remember kids the Dhar Mann lesson of the day. "It is okay to disobey your parents for a small chance for money!" A lot of kids want to become twitch streamers or things in the game developement because they see others do it and make it look easy. But they want to take the easy road.
So good! For the new bingo square with the unreasonable/naggy mom and fun/distances themselves from the family to manufacture plausible deniability dad, maybe include the word “pair” so you don’t get questions about it every time a parent appears on screen. Also, I think your explanation of the nature of the new bingo square vs the existing squares made sense.
This mom reminds me a lot of my father. Like as she was yelling at the girl, i got legit anxiety flashbacks. Something about the way she yells and the whole “your hobbies are useless” mentality as well as the “you’ll thank me when you get older” really hit me- and the kids ARE in the wrong sometimes, but that mom is not a very good mom imo
"Playing video games all day isn't going to take you anywhere" and like going to the mall will?? Bc she's not offering alternatives to having this free time( ie: “you should be doing chores” “you should be doing homework”),she's offering alternative ways to SPEND the free time
I have never seen a worse amalgamation of Minecraft gameplay, not only is he playing with a controller on the PC version, but he says he’s building a map when he’s very clearly playing some kind of minigame
