Mormon Missionary Returns to the Field as an Exmormon 

What a sad and sensitive story, so honestly and poignantly told. And what a poetic song at the end. My 3 sons served missions and now have left the church along with the rest of our family. Only my husband remains LDS. The church has robbed us of so much and yet we managed to find our humanity as we tired to live a life based on lies , that we were completely unaware of. .....therein lies the sadness underpinning our experiences. THANK YOU NEMO.

Disclaimer * I'm a believer, but i enjoyed this video. Reminds me of a line from the film 'the house of d' , "A man is only a man when he can be who he is wherever he is."

I served a two year mission for the church. I don't regret it. On the contrary, I'm grateful for that time in my life. I no longer believe. But I learned so much about standing my ground and subverting groupthink. I thought the church was wrong about how things were done, but now I realize we just believed in completely different things.

I am an active member of the church, Temple Recommend holder and more etc etc 🙂. I have read all the comments on here. I read them with interest and hopefully in a respectful and balanced attitude not dissimilar to the principles mentioned in Moroni 10:3,4. I’m pretty certain that a fair few of the people, who have commented here, do not know and/or have never met either of these two young men. I’ve been in numerous wards/stakes of the church in the UK and at certain points I actually taught both of them in their childhood/youth. In my personal opinion, they were head and shoulders above virtually all of the other boys with regards to attitude, sense of responsibility, service, decency, trustworthiness, ownership, wanting to do what’s right etc. Sure, they weren’t perfect but they stood out. I still keep in regular contact with them. One person on here speculated that Toby’s parents sent him on his mission and that he wasn’t serious about going. I know him and his parents, and I know that both speculations are not the case. I don’t agree with everything that either of them say or do, or how they say and do it. And I’ve told them both that is my opinion. But, having spoken to them both, I can understand very well why they did it. This video only paints a small picture of a very large experience, not all of which was, or is portrayed as, negative. I am imperfect and with numerous faults and weaknesses. Nonetheless, one previous employer of mine described me as having sound judgement, and as being totally trustworthy, and as being loyal to my superiors. But I like to think I’m loyal to principles, not people, because people change, whereas principles don’t 🙂. When I think of the times when I’ve felt the need to respond with words and/or actions to unsavoury incidents and issues at church, I was reminded of, and motivated by, a few quotes from the 2005 film ‘Kingdom of Heaven’: - Safeguard the helpless. - Defend the king…if the king is no more, save the people. - I once fought two days with an arrow through my testicle. Okay, that third quote doesn’t apply at church but hopefully it made some of you smile 😊. It was definitely said by Godfrey of Ibelin, and not Samuel the Lamanite 😉

I like the sentiment of owning the experiences you had in the church (or on a mission) as belonging to yourself and not being an extension of the church or anyone else. It’s good to review experiences we had in the past and understand what they mean to us now. Love the original song. Thanks for sharing ❤ I’m touched by the friendship of Nemo and Toby.

Thank you so much for this presentation. It was beautifully done. I served a mission back in the 80s before the Internet. My belief was based on my parents. Having found the truth I would love to go back and apologize to people I taught there.

Thank you Nemo and Toby, for a delightful exploration of Basel and the missionary experience. All we need now from the two of you, is a duet!!

I love that musicians who leave the church line to write songs about it. I wish there was a playlist of that kind of thing, especially from everyday people like this man.

Expertly produced and edited video. Very meaningful to me because I spent two years in Basel.

Lovely song!

Elder England represents so many of us.

Amazing how Mormon theology changes with the wind. When US. Congress refused to allow Utah statehood, due to polygamy & pedophilia .God came to the Mormon church and told them to give up multiple wives & sex with children... In1978, Jessie Jackson led a planned Salt Lake City protest of Blacks non admission to the priesthood & the temple. 100,000 Black men were organizing a protest in Utah of racist Mormon church teachings; Then, that same year, God then came to the Mormon church and told them black people were now okay. For 180 years, Mormon church taught hateful things towards Gays. Now in 2023, after bad press, God has told the Mormon church to back off the condemnation of Gays...Interesting timing of God's revelations & heat the Mormon Church was feeling.

Yes, thank you. I was a missionary here from 91-93 when we had only a few missionaries in Southern Germany and Western Austria. Good times. Better times now that I'm out and yet seeing parts of where I also worked brings a longing to also return.

Wow, the conclusion song woven with those images is powerful as it is poetic.

I view Mormon missionaries as recruiting members who will increase the religion's wealth, which is the religion's goal. It has nothing to do with "saving souls."

Excellent production..thanks Gentleman

Well done. Beautifully made.

I'm glad I got to serve a mission in Finland. That said, I'm also glad I walked away from the church. That said, the small church I attend now involves itself in local anti- trafficking efforts. Meanwhile, the LDS Church builds temples.

Hi there, (Elder) Tobi England, you should have come and see us, I just ran into this - and it was good to see you again. If you are ever back in the area, let us know or pass by. Take good care, Jonathan Scheible

EXMO here. Went tae institut in the Basel ward. Was from 91-93 serving in the Deutschland Berlin Mission. Cheerie'o daddy'o fae an expat brit now living in Weimar Germany. All the best tae ye bro ! 👍🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Well done Nemo. What a beautiful place to serve a mission. We went back to our mission area too - still believers but a bit more nuanced in my case.

Great video! I still don't know how to process my experiences on my Swiss mission (90-91), and just recently deconstructing/leaving. Good to know that others are trying to make sense of it as well.

O....M...G... Nemo, you continually blow me away with your talent. That was such a powerful video. TOBY! Your song was beyond epic. If you ever record an album, I'll be the first to buy it. Such a beautiful song and so emotionally charged: I am in tears ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Nemo stunning documentary style presentation! Love these perspectives, as I too have left the LDS church 4 years ago! Brilliant podcast! Thank-You! ❤ ❤❤

I was a missionary in England from 2005-2007.Since 2008 i live in Switzerland. I'm coming from Germany originaly.

Outstanding video, Nemo! Aside from being honest, heartfelt, and super informative, the filming and editing is superb. Love the closeups, stunning mountain views, and impressive architecture. They all blend so beautifully together and convey the images and thoughts and impressions Toby must have had during his mission years. An excellent portrait depicting the development of a young man’s train of thoughts on his beliefs, spirituality, and mission. The moving song with its reflective lyrics at the end perfectly captures the message. I enjoyed this video so much, simply had to watch it again :)!

owning your experiences personally, especially the language you learned, is really lovely

I love Toby's song! Beautiful! ❤

Beautiful video! Loved the song at the end.

Amazing video, thank you! May God bless Toby and this channel 🙏

Layers of beauty here Nemo. Thanks!

Religion is 100% human created. God is love and turns no one away

I to was a mormon missionary in Arcadia California 90-92

I love the missionaries. They serve so selflessly. I’m grateful every day for my mission over 30 years ago. We recently toured my youngest son’s mission in Argentina and I’m just amazed how willfully the missionaries serve.

Thank you Nemo. I just missed this live. I arrived right at the end. Anyway, this is a top level production. Thank you for sharing it with us. I was fortunate enough to visit Zurich when I was young like 30 years ago. lol. I loved it. A stunning city and country. Im happy Mr. England is free and able to enjoy the splendor of life.

nemo, this is SUCH a beautiful video. thank you mightily. ❤

I’ve been looking forward to this video all week! Very well done. I hope we’ll be seeing more collaborations with Toby in the future. Excellent job!

What a beautiful song friend. Wow😮

Nice work Nemo.

Thanks for posting this. It reminds me of somebody that I knew on my mission.

I served in Switzerland as well and this really made me miss it. Basel is a beautiful place!

Excellent. Thank you.

Excellent documentary and beautiful cinematography. 👍

Great video! Thank you!

What a beautiful story. Thank you.

Awesome directing and editing, Nemo!

Great video. Now I need to watch it several more times so I can write down those lyrics.

Nice Song ❤God bless you ✝️

Wooooow! What a beautiful Video. Very nice. 🎉❤

I love your projects Nemo!

Great job, Nemo. Brits make the best documentaries.

I loved it!

served stateside loved the people , returned to the area numerous times and still have friends from the areas I served. Still in the LDS church, dont plan on leaving. I heard most of all the reasons people leave but I choose to believe

Wow, this was such a great video!

lovely dialogue!

Well done!

Thanks for the video Nemo. Exmo American here. I lived in Switzerland in 2001. I went to school in Winterthur and in Zurich actually at branch of ETH. It was nice to hear Toby's experience while seeing some of the old sights. I am curious if Toby spoke any Swiss German or only High German and English.

I served my mission it was 30 years ago , i can meet my savior and say i did my best to help you out , im still faithful

Not Elder England! 😭 did not see that one coming. Still one of my favorite people I met over there, love ya mate!

When I joined the church in 1973 in the UK there was almost immediate talk of serving a mission . Luckily it was out of my hands as I was serving in the Royal Navy . As I’ve mentioned before I was excommunicated in 1980 with a Mormon wife ( now ex ) and too many children !! 0:56 At least I now have 13 grad children

You can always tell when a person believes in God, or doesn't. Just like those who make comments.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

💟 and at the same time c'est tragique,

Their approach styles are so cringe and inappropriate. If someone keeps walking at a certain spot, wears certain clothes, has books or paper in their hands, asks me “do you have a moment to talk?” I know immediately it’s a sale or someone with a dodgy agenda. Just looking at someone, how they behave, when and where, gives them away. There’s usually a couple of them looking and acting equally unappropriate. Guys approaching women are a huge no no. And thinking anyone is interested in joining a religion or cult is narcissistic. Those who are curious, will approach freely. I live in a capital and I am often approached by sales people in the streets. I don’t have time nor an interest in them. People are bothered when they’re disturbed by religious people interrupting them. God, religion, is a private matter. A source of conflict, highly triggering. Europeans keep their private religion/beliefs to themselves. Going after university students are predatory. Established religions are happy whoever turns up at their activities or services. They don’t want to recruit anyone. They want people to join only if it’s out of free will.

Here are my random thoughts, recollections, and reactions to this video and my own mission experience: Lack of boundaries. Disregard for privacy. Manipulation. Ignorance. Naivety. An attitude of "we know best, we have the answers, we have the key to happiness." Invite the spirit using as many means as possible in the lead-up to issuing the challenge to be baptized. Baptize individuals to satisfy quotas. Heap praise onto Joseph Smith, a charlatan and sexual predator. Teach impoverished people to give 10% of their earnings to a greedy plutocracy. Since, I have learned to question everything, to think critically, and to take control of my own life. I cringe and am embarrassed when confronted with thoughts of my 19-year-old self emerging from my bubble which is Utah. I was still wet behind the ears. I had never witnessed real-world issues/struggles. Now, I have such a larger perspective on life and am free from the control of Mormonism. It is so liberating. Kindness is my religion. Honesty is the best policy. And 'eat, drink, and be merry' is a pretty damn good mantra. That was a beautiful song, Tobias. Thank you for sharing with us.

How to break free from "Mob Menality" - It takes a strong person

The Alpine Mission is a hard one. Not very many convert baptisms.

I think there is a reason the church tends to send their missionaries to less educated countries. If Mormon Missionaries start having long deep conversations with highly educated people in countries like Switzerland its going to deconstruct their faith. I'm guessing most people in countries like Switzerland are just going to blow off missionaries rather than sit down and have long debates with them, its a shame. The Mormon Church also prevents missionaries from socializing with the locals, which prevents them from absorbing the culture, also intentional.

Religious beliefs can really mess people up. I've been trying to be "faithful" towards God for the past 10 years. Hasn't done anything other than wasted my time. Maybe there is a higher power that religions interpret to be God, maybe there isn't. All I know is that I'm done wasting my time living up to mormon expectations.

Does Toby England have anywhere he can be followed at?

What is the song at the end?? It's beautiful & would love to listen to it in full...

You blurred out the face of that other missionary, then zoomed in on his name tag...😅

Handsome boy!

How much to advertise on this channel Nemo? I want to promote a video documentary "🏛️ D.C.eived" 30 to 60 seconds & end screen link to video

Why don't you mention his lifestyle today? You relate?

"just wanna let you know what I told you back then was BS"

I’m curious Nemo, why do you go to church? I’ve heard you say you go to church. If you don’t believe why go?

Great video. It feels great to be ex-Mormon. I’m glad I never did a mission

Watched a few of your videos. Your channel was recommended by a friend. Its crazy you can acknowledge so many issues with the church in all your videos but still lie to yourself and keep telling yourself it's still true.

Basically you went back because you couldn’t let go of something you were most familiar with. Even people who know it’s false either stay or go back because it’s all they know. It break my heart that you can’t let go of this evil false religion and have to stick to it

Sometimes i wonder how this guy is still an active believing mormon

The Mormon church is in a bit of a crisis mode. That’s why companionships are separating. That’s why significant policy changes are being made.

meow 🐱

I've been to a hospital for some time. I didn't enjoy it. I don't have a desire to go back to that place. This guy has been on a mission. He didn't enjoy it (1:23). Yet he feels the need to spend money and time to go back to that place. I don't get the logic. (1:05) This is just how Americans behave. It has nothing to do with the fact that it's missionaries. But yeah, let's take this opportunity to make fun of the missionaries, because why not. By the middle of the video I think I understood why he went back. it seems he believes the Church is evil and what it does is evil and he went back to decouple himself from the Church within his mission experience of doing the "evil thing" by sharing the Gospel. (13:26) I wonder what has indeed convinced him to come out on a mission? During my mission I have also seen missionaries who haven't really got a testimony, but didn't have the strength of character to make an honest choice of not teaching the Gospel they weren't really sure of. Basically they were ready to spend 2 years lying to people simply because to them it seemed easier than the alternative they imagined. People don't like to feel guilty, so it seems, this guy instead of taking responsibility for his own choices just wants to present himself as honest and the Church as evil and him being a victim pressured into missionary work by an evil Church. Way to go. (14:13) What I'm trying to say here is "I was trying to save people by lying to them", but let me sugar coat that and say it in a different manner so that I look like a victim of an evil Church. Ah. Well done :)

This guy doesn’t seem like a serious missionary at all like he was just sent there by his parents and didn’t want to be there, there was a few I met like him and I mean a few quite a lot of them was serious about the religion and still post things about it on social media now years later, maybe changed times they only send out serious ones who knows, if it wasn’t for them most would never have known about the church I know I wouldn’t, we soon all learn it’s made up but some still believe despite that

This generation is so lost! I guess he never had a testimony and went for the wrong reasons. Moreover, he has made everything about himself and forget God.

I think all missionaries of all faiths need to go to Muslim countries and fight it out, and leave people to their own beliefs and their own cultures.

Wow this was such an inspiring video. I wish I could go back to my mission and act like everything I did was a waste. Why do ExMo’s always have to play the victim card? Do they always have to whine? Could just 1 ExMo please make a video where they tell the truth and not act like they were forced to go to church and believe? Just the same boring stuff.

So many ignorant and foolish comments by antagonists. You fulfill prophecy.

Unless you repent, there will be accountability and judgement on your part. Good luck😅

Well I hope Toby’s happy now. Obviously he left the church because he wanted to get drunk🍺🍺🍺

He is winking the eye on the cover image in his missionary clothes. Look up what winking an eye means in the Bible. It is evil.