This is definitely my most requested video ever, and I figured it's about time I fulfilled! Hopefully my story and some advice helps someone somewhere.
"If you're young, and you don't think that you fit in... you do; you're probably just trying to fit into the wrong places". - Dylan Geick I absolutley loved that! It's refreshing to see someone from our community openly share their perspective from a different side of the spectrum! Thank you!
"You don't have to talk a certain way to be gay, you just have to like guys." Dude, I am a fairly masculine gay boy and I can affirm this is like the most truest statement ever for those who believe in these gay stereotypes.
Unfortunately nowadays in stan twitter, gay tiktoks the gays are only perpetuating these stereotypes. I see every comment on gaga's, lana del rey, carly rae jepsen, charli xcx is describing music as "gay". How tf can music be gay ?? Not to mention other stupid stuff which they then excuse as "memes". Not to mention that almost 90% if gay guys are masculine. I dont mean alpha masculine. If gay guys liked hyper effeminate men then wouldn't they just date women ? That would make their lives 10x easier. Dont even get me started on top-bottom fetish. Some gay boys act like s3x is oxygen.
As I approach my 85th birthday I say that I would have appreciated this video about 70 years ago! Back then there was no one safe to talk to and no place to go that was friendly. All we "different" people could do was HIDE in the closet and masturbate. Every once in a while a chance encounter with another with the same desires would take place. It was almost always an electrifying and a guilt ridden experience simultaneously. There was no way to discuss my feelings with my family so I left home at 17 and, except for an occasional visit, I never went back. I learned early that my real FAMILY wasn't my BIOLOGICAL one. There was no hostility or nastiness... there was just nothing we had in common anymore. To make a long story short, I was lucky, I was a "masculine" looking, sounding, appearing and behaving person so "passing" was easy. After a few dozen years of one night stands and short friendships, I found my guy. We are now celebrating our 46th year together. I "made it" and I hope all my fellow LGBTQ+ travellers do too. It shouldn't be necessary to "come out." NO ONE should ever have to hide who they are... but that seems to be the way it is... for now. Maybe in a few more centuries... or millennia... we humans will have moved on from adolescence to adulthood about such things. But I wouldn't hold my breath. The way we're going we humans may not even exist by then.
Thank you for sharing your story. It's a very rare occurrence for us to gain glimpses into the olden days of homophobia from living, mentally coherent witnesses. I'm very happy for you to be in a stable long-term relationship with a partner that can share the burden of old age with you. May you two continue your wonderful shared story without suffering.
@@epaminon6196 Thank you for your note and best wishes. A couple of PSs... Those "olden days" to which you refer seem like YESTERDAY to me. Do what you want to do now. The day when you won't be able to will come much sooner than you expect... and, While there's some not-so-much-fun stuff in older age, there is also a LOT of great perks... one of which is not giving a damn about what anyone thinks of me.
Thank you for sharing your story ! I wish I had a better story! My first gay experience was with my cousin not a girl! Loved it! Then I couldn’t find anyone ! So I got married to a beautiful woman! But I see myself fantasizing about my past! About meeting a stranger somewhere like a restroom
So, fantasize about something healthier, like not cheating on the wife. Like ending things with her in a caring way. Like spending time with gay male friends until you feel a spark of a mutual attraction with a gay man they know. Build something with him fun and satisfying with him, and...it doesn't have to be in a shit covered public bathroom.@@geno5169
Being gay does not require being overly feminine or “YAS Queen!” And theres NOTHING wrong with that if you are. Just know you don’t have to fit in society’s stereotypes. Just be you and be gay ❤️🏳️🌈
I stopped playing Pokémon let’s go to watch this video. Watching this video made me laugh, made me feel anxious, and nervous all in a span of 14 minutes. I knew exactly what you felt when you described how hard it was to come out. Many times when I came out, I couldn’t even say the words and my friends had to guess and it was so suspenseful. I also didn’t feel like I fit the gay “stereotype” for the longest time. It was so hard for me to accept that I am gay because of it. Thank you for sharing this video Dylan.
Very nice coming out story. I never had your courage! Finally came out when I was 54 which was way too late. I struggled with my Demons, my self-esteem and being alone all my life. Pretty much destroyed any chance I had for a relationship or happiness. But I'm FREE now, the weight is finally off my shoulders. Thank you for sharing your story with me. Best wishes.
Hi Richard. I came out at 54 too. I have so much regret for lacking the courage to live my life and be happy! I am doing all I can to find love and acceptance! Good luck my brother!
One of my friends came out to me as bisexual as well! it’s a hard conversation, believe me. I just sort of brushed it off because I cannot deal with awkward things for the life of me
I watched this video in 2020 when I was living at the hardest moment in my life and I must say it saved me from depression and totally changed my life. I wish Dylan happy and continue spreading positivites to others.
Been gay for as long as I can remember but haven't been able to tell anyone. It's a very hard thing to live with. Depressing. My entire family is so anti-gay so that's what the hard part is for me right now. Thanks for your story
@Blue dude i had similar experience. I wasn't brave enough to come out to my sister, even though i knew that she knew. And one day we were discussing her boyfriend and she told me that she knows everything about me. You know i was like a stone from my heart. My personal advise: she already knows about you, you should just let her hear it from you. Love you❤
Become financially stable and then distance yourself from them slowly. Being not yourself is a recipe for being sad. If you are under sixteen don't say shit because you risk being homeless. If you are stable financially leave their ass alone.
The key here is your saying "Depressing" in regard to living in the closet. Imagine, literally, how dark and depressing life in a literal closet would be. So here is the key: Just crack the door open. Let a little light in. Just tell one person you can trust. Yeah, you'll still be there in that closet... but you will have allowed yourself to see a little light and maybe the depression will ease off a bit. You'll be able to smile. And, ya know, maybe you will be that much closer to meeting like-minded people... to meeting someone you will love and who will love you. But if both of you are now (and remain) hiding in the closet, how will that ever happen?
I hope you find the strength, it is difficult but those who really love you will learn to accept you. As others have said telling a friend who you trust is a start and will be a huge relief. I was in school when people started to question my sexuality, I wasn't in denial but wasn't prepared to but up with the crap from people but in the end I got sick of lying so I told my closest friends then stopped denying when anyone asked. I was nervous about telling my parents back but in time they came to accept it and they and the rest of my family were at my wedding 2 years ago. Its a cliche but it does get better. I have an ex who wouldn't come out because he feared the disapproval of his family, he's 33 now and still in the closet and has missed out on so much in life because of it. Remember you can't live your life through your parents eyes.
because it doesn't really matter, yes he's handsome, we all know that. Nobody wants to see thirsty comments in the comments below each videos he puts out.
Thx so much for this video Dylan. As a 56 year old gay man who grew up in an ultra conservative family, it meant a lot to me. As you said you come out multiple times over and over and that’s my story. It’s so hard to say ‘I’m gay” but it’s getting easier. Just came out to my 94 year old Dad and just a few more to go. Yes, even at 56 I’m not out to everyone. So your journey made me cry. It kind of made me wish I was born 20 or more years later as I think my struggle would have been easier. So thx for sharing your journey Dylan. This was beautiful!!
Rehash Pourheydarie I’m so sorry to hear that. I hope things turn out ok for you and you’re able to be happy with your identity regardless of who in your life does or doesn’t know
Karl, if you had my mother, you would have only needed to come out once. I swear I only told about 2 people in my whole family that I am gay about 27 years ago, one of my cousins and my mother. It spread like wild fire. Unfortunately my family did not take it very well and I lost many close relationships over it. I was not surprised but that is life. Some people supported me somewhat but my journey was almost exclusively my own without my family. I believe that that is different now. My family are not horrible people but bigoted and ignorant. They are civil enough now but I do not share the bonds with many relatives that I once depended upon. I do not regret anything though. In fact I wish I had had the guts to come out sooner. Dylan that is a terrific coming out story! I hope that you appreciate your friends and loved ones. It is a gift that is very much a new story.
I just came out to my parents after this video, and I told them I was dating a boy, and my parents our divorced, and my dad came out to me the day after.
@Hasiger Hase people are sometimes afraid of their own sexuality and repress it so far down that they start to believe they arent what they are. They convince themselves in their mind that they are not gay when in fact they are and live a life without much happiness in a straight relationship. Society and family often scare you into doing things. I know people who've been in straight marriages and who have realised they are gay and have gotten the courage to come out and get a divorce.
Since I got the notification you liked this comment here's and update! I came out to all my closest friends and they're really supportive. My family is another deal but I have hope!
@@judygarland7186 because I don't think is something necessary at the moment. I know some of them are not going to be ok with it and I don't feel like dealing with that at the moment.
This is the Dylan I like hearing from, I know a lot of people like the flexing and bragging guy who is always laughing with his mates (And that is totally OK!) But for me this is why I watch his videos. For the two or three minutes (in this case fourteen.) where we hear about his thoughts on issues like this. Thank you Dylan for a great video. You represent humanity in a great way.
not so far fetched. 1. high school friends. Identical twin brothers, both jocks in the closet. they found out about each other being gay, because they were both fooling around with the same guy! 2.another friend. the younger bro came home from college. his dad said, he needed to have a serious conversation. his dad, said to him, "your (older by 4 years) brother, has admitted to us, that he's gay. his response, was "so am i !" 3. a student of mine, in a discussion group, said, just as he had gotten the courage to come out to his family, then, his older jock brother came out at the dinner table. His dad,.actually said (pointing to my student, who wasn't a jock) "we assumed that you were the one who was gay! ha ha! It was treated like a joke. .It took him 2 years after that, before he actually came out to his friends, bro and family.
You are correct on what you said about sports. Open gay people in athletics is sorely lacking. Your story was interesting because of the reaction you got from your friends and the reaction to you. People try to define people and put them in boxes. It never works. It is not a one size fits all approach with people in life. You are correct you never stop coming out to people because situations and circumstances change. You were fortunate to not lose any friends. You keep being you and your video will touch someone. Take care.
Dylan, this brought tears to my eyes. This was done so eloquently filled with honesty and vulnerability. You are the perfect example of the non-stereotypical gay man. This is so important for young people to see. Over Thanksgiving my 18 year old niece came out to me then asked for support as she came out to the rest of the family. I was honored and so proud of her. I am so proud of you and all you represent. This video will forever reach and help people. Well done ♥️
Dylan, this in the exclusive realm of the most intelligent coming out stories. I wish we were friends, cause a friend who thinks and acts like you helps people recognize love is a matter of the mind and heart, not body parts. One does not have to be a bad imitation of a girl to be gay. The very best to you in your life.
why do you have to knock down others to lift yourself up? Do you think you’re really being lifted up or are you just knocking others down to have the illusion of being lifted up. Get rid of that internalised homophobia
You missed everything I was saying. Pansexuality could save the world because all expressions of love are equally valid. But while I lived in San Francisco ... near the Castro... seeing a guy in combat boots, hairy legs, a red mini skirt, goody red lipstick, flitting down the street like a butterfly hardly adds to the vallidity makes one take that lifestyle seriously.
@@michaelbrown-tf1so So what you're saying is... you can be gay but only a specific type... the type that is most acceptable to straight society, the type where you are masculine and no one would know you are gay unless they asked you or you told them. So you're saying gay people should be palatable to straight society and not our authentic selves. I'm sorry that so many gay men are too feminine for you and thats how they are, but im sure most will tell you that they will never ever reject themselves again in attempt to be accepted within society. I hope that you stop perpetuating these harmful ideals and that you keep them to yourself. Gay people especially gay feminine men have had enough people questioning their validity and humanity and enacting violence on them, they don't need people within their own community to join in and dogpile as well.
@@michaelbrown-tf1so I would also like to add that someone's gender expression is not a "lifestyle" it seems you've adopted that vocabulary from homophobes as well. The agreement between your inward self and how you present yourself to society is not a lifestyle choice. For many it is just simply how they are and they cannot change that.
Dylan I feel the same way, I don't fit the stereotypical "gay", I don't know when I'll tell my family but it seems like such an impossible thing to imagine. But thank you for uploading this video, really does help! It does suck that when someone is gay, everyone assumes they are one way
vidParadise there's more than one stereotypes and they are only truly stereotypes when people think every gay person is in one of the few basic categories always shown on movies or stuff. But I get what you mean.
One of the reasons why I gravitated towards you was because I saw my brother in you. He is also gay but doesn't "fit the stereotype" and struggled a lot with it. You are indeed helping with representation and I thank you for that because you will help a lot of people!
The way you came out to your girlfriends 😂 You:*talking about how cute boys are on insta* girl:“when are you gonna come out?” You:“Now I guess” haahahha
I have always been amazed at how comfortable you are being gay, and being affectionate with your boyfriend. Having grown up in the 70s, where there was no safe place to come out and no role models at all, it's a different world. And I am so happy for you and proud of you. You are a terrific, positive role model. I hope it will become more acceptable for athletes to be out and proud.
J Carter I don’t think he’s trying to say that he need a role model to be gay. If you are gay, you are gay. He’s saying that he wished there were role models to look up to and see that he wasn’t alone and there are people who are openly gay and are doing great.
Dylan, you are infinitely more supportive and encouraging than you’ll likely ever know. Like you intimated, even today, people just assume everyone they meet is straight. One’s personality and character are what matter, not their attractions. I usually think we grew up in different worlds, but in fact, not so much has changed, eh? Damn you are so eloquent about that! Bravo and thank you!
Breaking all kinds of "stereotypes," being a gay athletic "jock" type, but also being so damn smart, and being able to put your ideas into such a genuine and eloquent story, i havent watched a sit down video like this in a long time because they just dont keep my attention, but i could listen to an entire TED talk of yours, its obvious that you know what your talking about and have a clear, well spoken train of thoughtful. Inspiring! 😀
You are lucky to have someone you could talk to while you were in high school. I was 19 and in college when a couple of friends from New Orleans took me to my first gay bar near our university in Baton Rouge Louisiana. Being from a very small town and 12 years at small private Catholic schools for over privileged children. 200 in the school from 7th to 12th grade. I’m the oldest of 5 sons and very close to my brothers and parents. Never had problems with family or neighbors. I graduated high school in 1975 when many people had problems with parents. I still enjoy disco music. Thanks for your story. 😎
Dylan, this is a 'life-saver' video. I say that having taught and counseled over 6000 young people. Thank you, bro, and keep up the good work saving those who have been thrown away by some. Thanks, man.............Ray
Congratulations!!! You had a fairly unique experience in your coming out process. You were material in making significant change in an entire community. You show many, many skills and your impact upon this world will likely be significant. You are blessed, not only with the many physical aspects, but blessed with a wonderful perspective, ability to express and perception of issues. Please use this well and remain that same caring, truthful and positive person you are right now. Thank you for such a story, you truly warm my heart.
@@jcarter3238 Who knows who he might help or what he might accomplish. I wish the best for someone who exhibits a great amount of potential. Good luck on receiving a cure for the cancer of cynicism.
9:55 Is my biggest fear, my mom is super religious and I heard her say some homophobic things. On the other hand I came out to my internet friends last month and I'm thinking about coming out to my "real" friends on a trip we're taking in January. Thank you so so so much for this video, you cleared my mind in some things!
Yea my mom is religious as well and when I came out my mom said I was confused and just wanted attention that, that is not allowed in the bible and my dad said I don't understand you used to always like girls I don't know where this is coming from. And both of them said I was not Gay and that hurt because parents are supposed to love and support you no matter what so yea. They also said a lot of homophobic things and a commercial about Love, Simmon and they hated the movie but just tell them and if they don't like it it's there loss.
I remember coming out to my mom,it was the hardest thing to do but I can't believe she accepted me and hugged me.It restored a relationship between the two of us which was completely broken before.We've never argued again.We've been best friends ever since.
I want to be with some one that's going to accept me for me and be happy with me and be myself self for the best of us I need and won't to do things that I only imemagige and be happy with that special some one:)
Hey Dylan, I know that you won't see this, but this is for your subscribers. I am many, many generations older than you. Thank you for sharing your coming out story online. Coming out is always more about accepting yourself rather than telling others what they might not (or might) know already. It was more dangerous when I was your age, but it is always scary. Especially with parents or family. You are right, you can always get new friends, but it's impossible to get new roots like mom and dad. So glad it went well for you. Coming out is about facing our own fears and homophobia. Still, it is hard to do something that might mean that those who are supposed to love you unconditionally could tell you they can't love you anymore. The first task is to love yourself in a good way. It's about self-respect. I am a cis straight-looking guy, no one would ever guess I was a gay Major in the Army, highly decorated masculine guy and yes, just like you. I've seen that it is when people are in the closet that they get themselves into trouble. People get angry and feel 'tricked.' Being out, there is no surprise. Being in the closet is asking for trouble. So thanks again for busting stereotypes, peace, and blessings.
Awesome job telling your story! It is so important to see guys like you talking about breaking the gay "stereotype." You will probably never realize how many people will be inspired by this!
I feel like a proud mother. Literally. I might be straight but this is really great Dylan. I already read comments that said that people came out because of you, and it's amazing. 💗💗
Sorry Kam I feel differently, no disrespect but this monologue was a ramble. Personal stories tend to be hardly ever "well spoken" maybe you're suggesting or referring to his voice tonal quality. Have you tried listening without watching the person herein the video while he is speaking?
I think he’s also well spoken - and u can be very well spoken when giving a ramble of stories - his clarity is excellent. He never seems to say “ammm ehhh ughhh “ amid sentences.
Curlyjo Robbie well spoken doesn’t necessarily have to mean totally linear or clear in their monologue but just they express themselves eloquently and convey their point in an intelligent and meaningful way
Since the first thing you said I realized you were inspired by Troye Sivan. As you told your story, I recognized many of Troye and Connor speechs. That have made me cry because Troye's videos saved my life. I came out to my friends in 2018 when I was 16 years and for my parents in 2021 when i was 20 years. All my friends went great with that but I still have serious problems with my parents today. Please, keep this video. It can help so many people around the world. It would help me when I was younger. PS: I live in Brazil
I really loved the video! I love how you point out that personality and sexuality do not necessarily corrolate with one another. You and Jackson definitely helped me to publicly come out in the past year and I want to be able to help others in any way I can as well. Love you, thanks for making this awesome video! ❤️
Kaden Kollmer generally you sort of know because you can feel it although some people do take longer to realize. I guess it comes down to how you feel when you are around guys versus girls. Sorry I don't have the best answer if anyone else has a better answer please help!
Kaden Kollmer well if you are attracted to the same sex, that means you are gay. It does take some time to figure out but just go with your feelings. You’ll figure it out.
Broo youre story defines me exactly i have always been very masuculine , joined my highschool wrestling team 3 years ago and all my friends where soooo fucking straight and its been ever so difficult to ever come out to them
My entire family has been extremely into sports and my brother and dad are EXTREME sports guys and then just me over here the smart kid (who works out) but definitely isn’t into sports and doesn’t fit into the “gay” stereotype who only hangs out with girls at lunch (I am totally fine with guys and actually my two best friends are guys). I have come out to my best girl friend but no one else 💀, and I’m not that worried about my family because I know how much they love me and care for me that they won’t really care and my older who is in my grade and like an actual giant would stick up for me and fuck everybody up (even though I think they already know LMAOOOO) but I’m more scared about my friends and just the people at the school cause everyone just spreads things so quickly like holy shit. And even today two girls asked me if I was “bi” and I like instinctively said no and kind of like winced at the idea which mad me sad afterwords cause then I felt like I should’ve said “Yep I like dick” and it would’ve all been over. But idk I’m rambling and I think this video points out awesome things of just knowing when your ready. Like me I’ll wait till I have a husband and 3 kids.
I can relate as well. I spend my whole childhood playing soccer and I've always struggled with coming out to teammates. What sucked even more was that I had crushes on some of them. I was so in love with this one kid to the point where it was starting to distract me from the game
That felt so intimate. I felt that I was talking whit a friend. This video was awesome. Thank you. My english is so bad to express all i want. I love u
Thank you for sharing! I thought that was wonderful advice to those that are scared about coming out: I know without a doubt you helped out many and gave others courage to come out. ❤️
This video changed my entire life. I cannot express enough gratitude for posting this video. It really gave me the courage and bravery to step into the next version of myself. You reminded me to search for my strength within myself to become the person I knew I was supposed to be. Thank you Dylan.
Intelligent, honest and inspiring. This coming out story will help numerous people now and in the future. Thank you for surpassing my already high expectations of you sharing your experience Dylan. So many important and wise words contained within this video. It’s a must watch for everyone! 💛💛💛💛💛
Love that you shared this 👌🏼 just like yourself, i’ve never felt much or even any negativity from my friends or family and i feel very lucky to be able to say that.
Jeroen van Holland kom je ineens Jeroen van Holland tegen in de comments😂 Wil wel ff zeggen dat ik je echt een legend vindt en je me hebt geïnspireerd als gay
Finally with Dylan I can finally see a niche. I know you don’t have to talk a certain way to be one, but it is nice to hear. Not everyone are THAT stereotype.
Bless your soul Dylan! The fact that you want to break these stereotypes about people who play sports or are more artistic is really something incredible! That was a really nice story, I really enjoyed it! 😁😁
I absolutely loved this video!!! I'm gay and been out of the closet for a month. My friends know I'm gay, my biological family knows, but my parents who raised me thought they raised a straight kid. I'm still in the closet to them and... yeah still haven't found the right moment. You guys have been so inspiring!!!!!
@@GlynRobinson take your time something like this is yours to tell only when you're ready, and i just broke up with my boyfriend so I'm not ready to get another yet. Lol
. Who cares!! NOBODY. THESE RU-vidRS POSTING ABOUT something that matters no more. You’re not in the ‘60’s anymore. Let’s talk NARCISSISM . NOBODY IS GOING TO BENEFIT FROM….YOU. Good grief…there is no dignity anymore. Who CARES!! Nobody.
. Who cares!! NOBODY. THESE RU-vidRS POSTING ABOUT something that matters no more. You’re not in the ‘60’s anymore. Let’s talk NARCISSISM . NOBODY IS GOING TO BENEFIT FROM….YOU. Good grief…there is no dignity anymore. Who CARES!! Nobody.
. Who cares!! NOBODY. THESE RU-vidRS POSTING ABOUT something that matters no more. You’re not in the ‘60’s anymore. Let’s talk NARCISSISM . NOBODY IS GOING TO BENEFIT FROM….YOU. Good grief…there is no dignity anymore. Who CARES!! Nobody.
I just came across this channel and I’m obsessed, you’re so well spoken and intelligent, and you put everything you said perfectly. You have a great understanding of life and sexuality at your young age, much more than a lot of people. I hope you continue to educate and more people discover you. Stay awesome ❤️
I so happy that this was my first video of yours. You’re so amazing and brave. Thank you for showing me how you approached it because I am an 18 year old senior! I hope this came across to the next generation. And this is why I’m subscribing
Three years ago you didn’t have a chance to know, but this video and your story is exactly what I’ve been looking to for a long time. So, thank you, a lot.
You have been placed on earth at this time in order that you may TEACH. Wherever you go and whatever you do, TEACH people that their preconceived ideas are WRONG. You have a voice, Dylan; make it a loud and transformative one. We NEED you!
This is my all time favourite video of yours!!! Thank you so much for sharing your story! You inspire me everyday and for that I can never thank you enough 🥰
You are so blessed because of your honesty, love and truth, along with the fact you are helping 1,000s of others. We are here in this life to bring each other home. You are doing it. God is with you and he will always bless you as long as you stay as you are with your core values of honesty and love for others.
You really inspired many people through your getting out story! I admire your courage! The issue, in my opinion, is to say your truth and express your true self. Thank you for sharing!
Wow this one is certainly one of my favorite coming out video because it's so similar to mine. Feels good to know someone laughed during their coming out to their familiy
