My Worst Alcohol Rock Bottom & The Beginnings Of My Recovery 

For some reason I love hearing stories from alcoholics who had/have it as bad as me. I’m not sure why these stories make me feel so good inside, but they do. I don’t think I get off on hearing the misery, so much as I feel a little more complete inside knowing that I wasn’t alone. Knowing that someone else understands what I experienced in my darkest times of rock bottom alcohol withdrawals and Delerium Tremens is comforting to me. I look back on my decades of active, uncontrolled alcoholism with some confusion and a whole lot of shame and regret. My years of sobriety have been soooooo much better. Thank you for this.

Oh Brother… What a story! Being from Central Asia myself I can attest messing with the police is a no-no, good thing u got out of that unscathed… But overall an insane story… Been a heavy drinker myself and recently sober. I suppose some of us watching may think “I haven’t gone to that extent”, but man oh man does it escalate without a person noticing… Best wishes to you brother, thank you for sharing your story, stay healthy and sober

I find your honest experiences with being an alcoholic informing and inspiring. I went into withdrawal on the Mon 29th April. I spent a week in hell but came through the other side. The Kindling effect is real and this was one of the worse i'd ever experienced. This coming Monday is going to be 2 weeks sober. I'm feeling optomistic but cautious. I know that just one can of beer can start me on the road to drinking a litre of spirits a day again. I can't let that happen. Drinking has cost me too much. I nearly lost my freeedom recently because of it but somehow by the grace of God i was given another chance. I won't throw that away. Too much is at stake. I'm taking it day by day and i feel great but i don't want to get too complacent. Keep up the great work. Videos like yours are a lifeline to someone like me. Thanks.

The most brutal story ever, your posh accent adds to the intensity.

Out of all the delusions alcohol can cause during extreme abuse and withdrawal, I think the most telling when looking back on my own struggle at least is just how long the general denial of having a problem goes on in the face of such dire rapidly escalating consequences. That delusion sets in at the beginning and gives way for everything else to come. Thank you Bat Country for sharing and helping me stay on track.

incredibly touching video. thank you for sharing. i hope this is cathartic for you-- i feel your pain and your joy.

Glad you’re here to tell the tale brother. Thank you for sharing this story. It’s absolutely insane the situations we put ourselves in because of our addiction. Though I’ve never had a story like this, there are definitely parts I can relate to. Keep up the good work bro. 💯

One thing I've learned about my alcoholism is that my favorite way to drink is set in stone. I like a liter of vodka a day, not unlike you. Sure as I'm breathing, if I start drinking again it's only a matter of time before I work my way up to a liter a day. And every time I relapse that window of time gets shorter and shorter. Thanks for your note about selfishness! I get the sense that the alcoholic knows they're living selfishly and they suffer silently with a nameless cognitive dissonance whether or not they're presently aware of it-- you encountered it with the guy who had been giving you money; you realized that you had been taking advantage. That realization is coming for all alcoholics in time. It was a hard realization for me knowing that I'm alive not due to my own resourcefulness, but rather the kindness of others.

Very good video and story, man. Had a hell of a time getting on that airplane. That made me laugh. Sorry. It always gets worse before it gets better. Coincidentally, when I started my channel on New Year's Eve, my third video was all about alcohol withdrawal and I think it's the video with the most views (8.8K) It got me a bunch of subs quick and it's the one with the most comments. My channel kind of ebbs and flows. I'm now six subs shy of 300. You were sub 200.

I haven't consumed much sobriety content, Delirium Dirk (RIP) being the only other channel I have watched other than yours. I have to say your story-telling, setting and honesty keeps me thinking about the monkey on my back, the one I am never safe from. I, like many others, see myself in what you say and your experiences (maybe not to some of your extremes but I can certainly draw parallels in the desperate, rough struggle of it all). I am curious as to the direction you go from here with the channel as there is only so many stories you can tell about your own experiences and how you got to the point of sobriety. Do you plan on exploring what worked for you and what didn't for getting you on the path of sobriety ( and what keeps you on it today)? Or does this seem like such a subjective process that you can do more harm than good with it? It's a space that is fraught with some ethical consideration that I don't envy. I do hope you continue and I am sure whatever direction you choose to go, you have a talent that will ensure you make a success of it. (Also you should shill the shit out of that book dude! How do I read it?)

Thanks for this.

Thank you for sharing -- such a poignant, compelling story very inspirational -- for me and for many -- stay sober & happy & wonderful You told it beautifully & Love your Microphone ~~~

Hi there. Well done on surviving. You've come a long way. Keep on keeping on. I enjoy the narrative style. One question: do you think you might have an underlying psychiatric problem driving the alcoholism or is the alcoholism the origin?

Love the video as always brother!

Wow, great story, thanks.

I find your voice so soothing. I hope you continue to make videos. I also think you could make a career creating/recording sleep stories.

Really honest and emotive real experience. Such a powerful story of the battle you are going through. Keep up the good, and strength to you brother. Thank you for sharing, as I see myself in much of your story and this solidifies the will to stay away from the abyss.

This has moved me so much ,, thank you so much for your videos and stories you are inspiring 😊

This is a great story (and it's well-told). I watched and fully enjoyed Part I as well, and am glad to hear its continuation.

Great upload as always. I always get drawn in and find it fascinating to hear your journey and stories of your past and how you had to deal with everything to end up where you are today. They are stories that any alcoholic struggling now or have struggled with in the past should hear. Look forward to more videos!

Love your podcasts...Sterling work. X

Bravo Stuart. Funny, emotional, harrowing and so so interesting to listen to your adventure. Thank you and please continue the great work.

Great story and great storytelling. I am glad to see this channel growing. Listening to your story, I wonder what kind of long term physical consequences you still experience from your alcohol consumption. Seems like lost teeth is are one consequence…what else? And how’s your head injury playing out these days? Maybe you can share in a future video.

Thank you again for an incredible video. It was unexpected to see you getting emotional, but completely understandable. Sometimes in the depths of our addiction its easy to start losing faith in not just ourselves, but other human beings aswell, it must have meant so much to be treated with dignity and care by others when you were at your lowest point. The "animal" comment from your landlord brought back memories of times when i had heard that kind of comment from my own mother after she had entered my room and seen the kind of state i would often leave it in. Whether its from a stranger or someone you know, that kind of comment stings, because you are feeling extremely vulnerable and soft in those moments, so criticism hits you twice as hard as it normally would, but its not just that, its that you know they are right. And of course the truth hurts more than anything.

Amazing video as always. You said in your hallucination video that people who have your kind of insight into the deep rungs of alcoholism are more often than not …insane or dead. I think that’s why I find it so fascinating. I am an alcoholic myself and have been rescued from Spain by my parents. But have only ever had auditory hallucinations during withdrawal. I suppose you make me feel not alone

After part 1, I took a google map tour through Aktau. Brutal. Baku looks nice though. Glad you made it home, reminds me of Psalms 116:6. Recounting past experiences that had this much potential for disaster has to be terrifying, I can't do it.

I've never had an issue with alcohol. I often choose not to drink because I hate hangovers. I shouldn't be interested in your channel, but I somehow stumbled across it while putting myself through caffeine withdrawals and lying around distracting myself with RU-vid. Not to compare the withdrawals at all - stopping caffeine just involves a headache for a couple days and a lack of energy/motivation for a week or so. Just wanted to give props because you're a great story teller. Although these videos aren't particularly relevant to my life I find them very interesting and there are parallels in the way addicted minds work. If you had another channel that explored other topics (assuming you want to keep this one focused on alcohol) I'd definitely check that out too. Cheers!

That is an incredible story and you are a great storyteller...

crazy story wow !

Another great video. Keep up this invaluable work! I noticed there are now YT commercials at the start of your videos. Perfectly fine for you to monetarise - heck, I would even pay for your content. But please never go down the route of putting commercial blocks into the video. It would spoil your narration. Keeping them to the begging is just fine. 🙏👍🏽

Hi from Dublin i just found your channel. I find these stories helpful as i have a serial relapser. How do you stay sober now? Did you try AA or 12 step meetings? I tried AA but it didn't work i am not good at speaking in public sharing or listening to othere stories and also labeling Alcohlic even when spber many years. Great story but very harrowing. My poison was white wine and lager mostly.

Gripping story

What happened to Dirk?

Good video 👍🏻. This is really random but sometime when you have a chance look up beardmeatsfood. He’s another RU-vidr and he reminds me a lot of you haha. Maybe the beards and the great camera work