Doug Wilson and Rachel Jankovic discuss modern myths surrounding motherhood and advice for Christian parents. Sign up for Rachel's webinar here: canonpress.com... This video is presented by Canon Press.
"Inviting" a husband's input is really giving lip service to the bible. If you have to invite your husband's input it means you're in a leadership role. How you got there isn't really relevant. Whether he abdicated or you usurped, the result is the same: you are IN CHARGE. there is a difference between being delegated to and being in charge: oversight. If you make decisions without oversight or accountability then you are in charge. And that is not biblical for a wife to be in that position. If a husband doesn't feel he has the impetus behind him to step in and correct or admonish when he thinks it necessary then you're deceiving yourself if you read your bible every day and pat yourself on the back for being a good Christian wife. Because you're not obeying the 1 part about being a wife that women just don't want to hear, or they want to land on it with a trampoline underneath instead of solid ground: and that is that it says "obey your husband as though he were christ".
@@andrewwhyte4753 I surely didn't. I started the video but had to stop watching it almost immediately because I had to take care of something immediately. After that, I just forgot about the video.
15 minutes I never grew up in a Christian home, but after Christ redeemed me I finally understood the love and obedience. I hungered and thirsted for His Word and His truth daily... and I always will until He returns 💓🙌💓 Holy Spirit changed my heart and renewed my mind
You guys helped get me out of these modern mom lies. Mother of a 3.5 and 2.5 year old. Thank you so much. I’ve been so starved of examples of Christian parenting from scripture.
I love Rachel and your entire family. Thank you for this hard biblical advice our world really needs this right now. My husband and I are trying to start a family so it’s a blessing to have tips grounded in Gods word. Peace and blessings from NC ❤️🙏🏼
I luv what she said about the joy that comes from obedience. It really is a sense of freedom when u can step back and see the order in the chaos of parenting when we practice obedience to God as parents and then teach our children that obedience and the love that we recieve is such a blessing❣
I tell my daughter that got equates love with obedience and that's why Jesus said if we love him we will keep his commands. We will do our best but we are not perfect and that's why we need Jesus
Amen to the sleep training comment! I sleep trained my nephew and as I watched him cry it out on the monitor I prayed and remembered that God often watches His children cry for their own ultimate good. There was a plan and purpose behind what we were doing and it absolutely paid off. My nephew is 2 years old now and he loves his bed and quiet time.
I recall an analogy that was given to me as a young father of two lovely toddlers: “Kids are like a cop walking his beat (swinging his night stick, I presume) grabbing the doorknobs of of the storefronts as he walks along… he really doesn’t want to enter, but only wants to be sure that they are securely locked that he cannot enter
Zowey indeed. I am not quite an older mom yet but I resonate so much with what Rachel is saying. There are biblical principles that should be applied to parenting decisions. Don't get so caught up in the secondary stuff that you can't figure out what is of primary importance.
My views as a mother have changed through the work of the Holy Spirit. I never wanted to be a stay at home mom so when I quit my job to be with my son I was devastated. I resented him and was so ugly to him and my husband during that time. Thankfully, God has opened my eyes to my own selfishness and now I am a stay-at-home homeschooling mom. It is crazy to see where I was several years ago and where I am now. Our family is a lot better off when I surrendered my freedom. The lie we are told in our culture, and Christian women have bought, is that we can and should do whatever we want with our time/lives. The truth is, as a child of God, my life is not my own. Only in admitting that can we attempt to be good parents.
Just wonderful to connect the two. I Read Rachel's book, "You Who" and her approach, her clarity and well reasoned criticism of those secular beliefs that exalt self has been refreshing every time I turn to it for reference. Today I now know she is Doug's daughter. That's gr8!
OK… I’m a 60-year-old mother of three grandmother of five, and I had no idea about the crying mom‘s Selfies (of course I’m not on instagram or FB). So I looked it up! Now, I will never be able to”unknow” this😫😬 Well, thank you Rachel for blowing my mind at the degradation of the next mommy generation! Goodness!
My children are older. I listened just to hear your views. I’m constantly complimented on how well behaved they are and how much people enjoy being around them. I always feel bad when they then start comparing their kids to mine. 😞 If there’s one thing I wish people would understand is that by them talking bad about their kids it’s a reflection on their parenting. We chose the hard biblical way that most didn’t want to follow as “loving you child” was pushed heavily while I was raising kids.
You may be claiming too much credit for your parenting. God gave you those children. No parent has complete control of how their children turn out. Chances are people are complimenting you so much because they know it is something you are proud about. People did that to my mother because she let everyone know how “smart” she thought her children were.
@@LauraDickenson hahaa wow. You read into things to much. I stated we tried to follow the Bible. Never once did I state that I was the reason they turned out pleasant people.
@@eflow4786 Actually, you implied this when you said the people complimenting you were making a statement on their own parenting. This implies because their kids are not as pleasant, their parenting wasn’t right or as good. The Bible is true and we people are flawed and we are given different children to raise. Praise God you have fabulous children. He doesn’t promise we will have well behaved children or that they will even be Christians.
Anytime a parent is putting down their own children, especially to compliment another parent, I'd say it could be VERY indicitive of their parenting. It also puts pressure on the parent being complimented! :'( Tearing yourself/your child down is not a healthy way to build someone else up.
The thumbnail gave me a clue the two were related. Funny how relatives who otherwise do not quite look alike give away their relatedness by their laughter. Great job, you two! 👍👍
So many of the things you both have said resonate with me in so many ways, and many of the things you have said I agree with. Thank you for confirming my feelings on discipline and my husband's involvement in our child's discipline. Essentially thank you for confirming I am not crazy. Now I need to find a good church where I live.
I love the comment about the twos not being terrible, and I totally agree that a well-disciplined 2 year old is so much fun! Signed, a mom of a 3 year old, 2 year old, almost 1 year old, and due with #4 in October 🥰
I like what you said about teaching your child self-restraint. I have one question for you though: Is it possible that a parent could choose to parent a certain way, not because it’s trendy, but out of self-restraint? I say this because I’ve found that for me, some discipline methods like spanking 1) appeal to my flesh and anger and 2) seem to make my kids behave even worse. Setting boundaries and carrying out consequences works so much better for our family, and truly giving them a choice. Good choices have good consequences and bad choices have negative consequences.
I know I'm just an old grampa, but can't young moms and dads just turn off social media and leave it off? Seems to me it just magnifies the effect our decaying culture has on the young family.
I am 50 and I am so glad I FULLY rejected the evils of Growing Kids God’s Way aka Babywise when I had kids. Many at my church were drunk on it when my first son was born. Glad I saw the toxic advice from this book. Where in the Bible does God make babies suffer?
Is that the one on sleep and feeding schedules that makes your baby sleep through the night in 6 weeks? I read a book like that and it clearly said if I didn’t do their way of scheduling, my child would definitely grow up to be a secular humanist. I’m 59 but had kids when I was 33-39.
Not in God’s character at all to ignore the cries of his children and refuse to meet their needs. I believe you’re causing kids to stumble when you wire their brains to not trust their caregivers.
“And shall not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him, though he bear long with them? “ (Luke 18:7) God does not ignore the cries of His people. But He also does not immediately scoop them up and wisk them away from every difficulty and painful circumstance. Sometimes, it may seem that God is ignoring your cries for relief because He does not immediately change your difficult circumstances. He “bears long” as His elect cry out to Him. This is why the psalmist of Israel-David himself-a man after God ‘s own heart would say things like this, “Why standest thou afar off, O LORD? why hidest thou thyself in times of trouble? (Ps 10:1) Pleasure is not the best thing that can happen to you, and pain is not the worst. God uses difficulty to shape us into the people that He has called us to be. He makes trouble work for our good. Ultimately, He will address all injustice, and deliver His elect from their persecutors.
Really enjoyed this! Would loved to have been a fly on the wall when Rachel was growing up as to who had the last word! Having 9 daughters of my own (plus sons), it is interesting and pleasing to see how they are now bringing up their children!
I have often considered how difficult it must be for anyone today who is say 30 years old and under. Everything is so transient and garbled in the modern "social media" environment. To survive and prosper today one must seek what is timelessly important. That is the only thing that can save, enlighten, and fulfill. That begins and ends with seeking the face of the Living God in the Trinity of God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.
Obey Christ where He puts you. We can work with the Holy Spirit to build the Church and make disciples throughout the nations. The resources coming from Cannon and Moscow ID are great blessings.
She is lovely, intelligent and well spoken. The topics discussed here are important and should be examined. I get that sometimes a whimsical attitude can come across as sarcastic. She, however almost comes across as superior and uncaring. And definitely looking down on the struggles of others.
She makes a great point that many women and mother's today have no personal testimony to the freedom and joy that obedience to God provides. They didn't grow up in a Biblically based home. And tragically most are not learning it in their modern world appeasing, "easy-believism" 'churches.'
This was great! Thank You Rachel! I noticed this very liberal fad in parenting about 7 years ago when I became pregnant for the first time. And since then, I have constantly been the outlier in mom groups. I try really hard to just maintain fair and objective rules and boundaries with my son. Attempting to teach him that life goes well when you obey, and we obey to glorify God, and that there can be rewards for that obedience, versus consequences and pain for disobedience. I would say that it is hard to sort out, on your own, like in my case. But not impossible! I wasn’t raised in the Church. I wasn’t even raised with a mother, because she abandoned us right after I was born. And my single dad, whom was a Vietnam Navy Veteran, did the best he could to raise us. So I will admit that I wasn’t taught any of these things growing up, and now as a mother myself, no one has been willing to come along side me to disciple me in motherhood, or even womanhood! So again, it’s just been left to me to try to learn, and research, and self teach. At this point, I’m doing kind of ok. 😂 But that’s in light of me still constantly trying to understand better, and implement better. The biggest struggle I have through it all, is in having a husband that’s not fulfilling his his ordained role. In not leading, not shepherding, not teaching, etc. so in the best case scenario, he would cover his bases, and I would cover mine, and together the home and children would he well covered and effective. But often I am the only one covering any bases. So my struggle is in how to raise my kids to the most glory to God, and raise them in the fear and admonition, in light of quite possibly having a husband that might not ever lead, or shepherd, or cover, or teach. It might just be all me for the next 20 years of parenting. And of course I’m prayerful, I just also accept God’s Will if this is what He intends for me too. I spent too many years in frustration and anger, and now I’m just bucking up, and trucking onward! Even if I go it alone. I wonder if y’all have any content good for my particular situation? Feel free to advise if you read this Rachel or Uncle Doug. 🙏🏽♥️
Jaqui, my name is Jacki. I've commented before on some of your posts. Maybe you remember me? I understand you situation is difficult. With the help of the Holy Spirit and a soft conscience, your situation can still bring glory to God and you can win your husband without a word. I'm going to try and link an article that I think will help you. Will you read it and let me know your thoughts? Much love to you sister. Jacki
I can relate on a few things. I was also not raised in the church, my mother abandoned me, and even before Christ I was different than the mainstream mother's. My daughter is turning 7 soon. Praise God that I was always leaning Christian before I was redeemed. 😅 the best advice I can give you comes from my experience personally, and it's the same advice I've been telling my daughter lately. Seek God above all each and every day, and everything will fall into place. It sounds simple but it's hard in this crazy world. The more you seek HIS Word, HIS truth, and abide in Him, the more biblical living and patenting will come naturally. God bless you sister
They're just extrapolating specific details from broad biblical principles. IE God made men and women different and cross-dressing is a sin so we should probably dress our children in sex distinctive ways fairly early on.
@@ambethk77But God didn't make any colours distinctly male or female... And humans have only decided about it very recently! In 1918, an article from a trade publication called Earnshaw’s Infants’ Department, declared that, since it was derived from red, “Pink is for the boys, and blue for the girls. The reason is that pink, being a more decided and stronger color, is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl.” A 1927 survey by Time magazine showed that department stores were completely scattered when it came to recommending gender-specific colors-Marshall Field’s and Filene’s preferred pink for boys and blue for girls, while Macy’s and Wanamaker’s said just the opposite. “There seems, then, to be no great unanimity of U.S. opinion on Pink v. Blue,” the article concluded.
Thank you for this video. I must confess that when I first took the time to read the passages about women’s roles I was angry. Because, as Rachel stated I had my own vision as to what being a woman was and God’s vision was the exact opposite of that. I accepted the biblical teachings on womanhood after much study. I actually had to leave the denomination I was raised in (UMC) because they were allowing unbiblical things to happen. As for motherhood I’m currently single (I’m 20). But honest conversations like these are helpful as I will most definitely be considered a modern mom. As for the selfies, I think it’s important for mother’s to show their vulnerability, but selfies are definitely the wrong way of going about that. Mother’s regardless of whether or not their Christian are human beings. There is a cultural pressure to look “put together” all the time. This pressure is put on moms especially. Questions: 1. Is there are anything wrong with dressing babies in pastels? 2. Will the webinar be available online afterwards?
She’s a really beautiful woman. The battle scars of age, child bearing and God fearing are worn well on her. Whoever changed her name to Jankovic is not a lucky man but a worthy one.
Could you please balance the volumes of your microphones so that they are at roughly the same level? Rachel's is either way too high, or yours is way too low.
My youngest child ( of 5) is 30. Neither my grandmother( ten kids) my mother( 4 kids) or I let our babies, " cry it out." Discipline must be age appropriate. I might add that all of the aforementioned 19 babies grew into responsible adults.
Something that’s always surprised me about the sleeping wars amongst Christian moms is that this is something the Bible does describe. Descriptive, not prescriptive, but let’s consider what’s described: crib - Jesus swaddled in a manger, or bed-sharing - the baby smothered by his mother in Solomons time. So when these moms get on the internet insisting that anyone who swaddles their baby is “abusing” the baby? 🥴 Jesus was abused? I don’t know… it’s only descriptive, but I really don’t think there’s any way we could condemn swaddling in light of scripture.
He charmed me into a “like” with the “cigar” 😂 Seriously though, what a gift this family is. I also have graduated over into the “older woman” territory. I think it snuck up on me at my firstborn’s wedding. I would say to younger moms, that I recognize how thoroughly exhausting it is just to BE a mom. And on top of physically caring for your young child, and possibly your own nauseated morning sickness self, you have the heavy burden of all the experts with all their opinions. It truly is exhausting. I agree with the premise here that we must look to the scriptures when it comes to our motherhood, and look away from the world. I personally disagree with the “cry-it-out” stuff. I’ve happily raised my seven babies out of their babyhood without spoiling them, or ignoring their cries. There are actually myriads of other choices. But let’s not devolve into adding MORE mom guilt to the arena. Young moms sure don’t need one more book, one more blog, one more RU-vid channel, telling them how to be a perfect mom. They need to understand that the love of Jesus in the heart of a mother is plenty to go on. Especially around homeschool circles, there’s just so much nonsensical motherhood legalism. Cry-it-out vs. attachment, bottle vs. breast, stroller vs. carrier, cloth vs. disposable diapers (elimination communication moms roll their eyes) and goodnight don’t even begin to talk about food! It’s ridiculous. The older moms need to have the wisdom to keep their big mouths shut when it comes to these particular preferences. I’m always telling the younger moms at church, to seek first the kingdom of God, pray, and do whatever works in THEIR family. And thank God, Rev. Wilson brought up the Dads. What a tragedy an abdicating father is. It’s a mistake to place the blame for that sin on the mom who IS doing everything she can. When moms are reading the parenting books, and seeking wisdom from older moms, searching the scriptures and DOING all of the childcare, and Dad flat out refuses to give a damn, that’s really not her fault. When a father like this plows into a situation he does not understand and selfishly proclaims some sort of off the cuff “parenting” it’s not wise or obedient for the poor young mother to flush her hard earned wisdom down the toilet in favor of her husband’s opinion. Young mothers need to know what to do when their husband is so detrimental to the family.
Just to be "that guy"....your last date ... the month is spelled Arpil. Just watched this again with my wife in person as I shared it with her and my 17yr old daughter (via link through text message) and neither had watched it yet... so. Yeah. Figured I'd point that out. 😇😁
first thought, God's Word says, in Titus 2, 'that the aged women...verse 3, and then 4, that they may teach the younger women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, and 5, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the Word of God be not blasphemed'... I pray that the teaching is in line with this...
These truths are great because it gives you a good guide even for special needs mothers. But having a brain injured child brings up a whole lot of mother guilt. Not easy when you don’t know what or if your child understands? That you have to live by faith.
Can you tell me where to find resources on biblical parenting? I’m really struggling with one of my children and I realize I’m treating her like a horse that needs breaking out of desperation. She’s 4/5 kids but a breed of her own.
I get that it's basically anadvert for a webbing but would have liked more teaching... felt like they were talking around the points and not giving actual direction on how to handle those points etc... so I enjoyed it but I don't think it was all that helpful... 🤔 is there a follow up?
I'm one of those undisciplined children. I have the worst life ever and not even other followers of Christ tend to want to spend time with me. This life is only pain and suffering for me and I bear the life-long consequences of disobedience to scripture. Please spend time with and train your children. They are a ministry from God.
I'm sure there are plenty of people who would want to spend time with you. Try volunteering for your church or another charity, it's a great way to socialize. Hope God helps you find what you need. 🙏
I never understand the whole, absolutely evil argument the left makes, where they say to be an empowered strong women you need to be able to be sexually active but have abortions available on demand no questions asked, when you look at someone like Rachel here. She is incredible. 7 kids. S E V E N. And she looks like she does and is as smart and aware of current evens as she is and is just flat out as awesome as she is. Rachel is a strong example to me of how having kids is MORE rewarding for both the man and the woman than any career you could possible imagine.
You realize the boomers raised the kids that make up this mother culture, not sure how seeking it boomer counsel improves any of the problems Rachel outlines
I'm going to ask my lovely young mother daughter-in-law if she has seen any of these selfie-crying posts.... hilarious/weird/sad... (late-60's blessed grandfather). "... I actually like watching myself be the victim of my own life, and I curate myself as someone who is having an emotional drama all the time." ... "zowie [yeah, me too]" .... she has a great way with words.
I don't think this is a conversation about modern moms - this is an age old conversation. Every generation can point to disagreements about how to raise children. What many point to as a golden age of the family where gender roles were pretty restrictive actually produced sexual liberation, indulgence, and drug use in Baby Boomers. I also think this emphasizes the need for women to not wait for father's to discipline, but be disciplinarians as well accepting their legitimate parental authority. Train up a child in the way he should go...
Strict gender roles have been around literally forever. There were other forces that caused the sexual liberation and feminism of the 1960s. It doesn’t make sense to me that gender roles led to the Baby boomers.
Can someone explain how you discipline a toddler then? I've generally heard of the phase "terrible twos" even by obedient Christians describing their toddlers. Developmentally toddlers are learning so much and trying to be independent.
I have a two year old. For us, focusing on routine, sleep, and nutrition (look at Weston price) has helped a ton. For discipline, we are VERY consistent. Disobedience, disrespect, whining, hitting = consequence. We don't count to 3 and we dont give warnings since he knows what is expected at this point. We personally use timeouts. So far it seems to work better for us. I struggle to give consistent discipline when spanking is the only tool. We also dont nag. We give him a simple short explanation of what he did wrong. Hopefully, this helps on some level.
Look up dr. Gabor Mate he is a proponent of attachment parenting. If you create a secure attachment from birth you’ll see your child grow into an obedient independent a d loving child. Look it up!
Newsflash they beat their kids. They beat them into submission. Rachel’s own mother beat her butt for not being joyful when her mother showed up to pick her up from a friend’s house. For the love of all that is holy these are not the people to be seeking child rearing advice.
@@kaylan2083 her mother brags about this cute little interaction in an interview. Do your own googling and look to child psychologists and developmental specialists for your discipline measures not Christianity.
I'm genuinely confused about the breastfeeding comment. Are moms not allowed to feed and nourish their children in public? Is there a biblical reason for this?
Ahh, the moral minority. In the US we are free, we have freedom of religion. Which means that you and I are free to choose your own religion or none at all. Where too many go wrong is thinking that your beliefs are right for everyone. But that's not how freedom works. I'll fight for your right to go to church. But I also believe that you should fight for my right to not have a religion. That's freedom. That's the American ideal. I get that you believe in God and go to church, but if you believe in this country then you also have to be secure in your own beliefs to let others live their own lives without interfering. That's what too many have forgotten in America
I had one picture of my first son done in those southern, lacy outfits. He was already so boy/man that he looked silly! Lol. That’s the only one. It is very southern and didn’t work for mine. Enjoyed your perspectives!
Sadly we have a generation of adults, and I use that term adult lightly that have arrested development so they can become easily emotionally disregulated. They don't know who they are in Christ because they do not know Christ at all.
The sad thing is, that everything that should help Christian families or mothers etc. You have to pay for...while the world puts their agendas out for free... Doesn't the Bible say that older women should teach younger ones and freely it is given to you freely you give...
Chromosomes DON'T LIE. Evil prospers when the good do NOTHING about it. Being perverse is mental illness or just pure disobedience. Let it be said as a warning coming to the second death that they may hear, "Depart from Me, for I NEVER knew you, you workers of iniquity!" In scripture is life and life more abundantly not of riches of the world but heavenly gifts from a loving father. Suffering is a part of life, hopefully to learn from and grow, pruning the best of trees produces the best fruit.
As an introvert, I can say with complete confidence that "Introversion" is just another word for "I'm selfish". It is deception and it must be fought daily.
I am an introvert, and so was my husband. We had 7 children who were always at home because we homeschooled them. If God blesses with a child, He will undertake in every way, and an introvert can always find ways of being alone. We find our peace and calm in Him and in the midst of our God-given duties. "He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty."
I don’t know. I think I really do see a clear distinction between myself and say my extroverted husband. I can’t handle all day family get togethers and constantly being on the go. After 14 hours with my seven kids, I do lock myself in the bathroom at times lol! I don’t think it’s selfish necessarily to be introverted. I think we really are wired differently and we should both honor and learn to live with each other’s differences.
To say God does not let his children suffer for their own good is completely false and I'm surprised to hear you say that. What else is the concept of perseverance produces character, except that there is some suffering involved?
They were being sarcastic when they said “No” to the question, “Does God ever let us suffer for our own good”. They were implying that Yes God does allow suffering for our own good. They laughed and said no because they were being sarcastic.
Here's a quick way to think and approach parenthood as a whole....those kids belong to God, they are God's from conception into eternity. A parent is given stewardship over what is Gods. If you look at your child as though they don't belong to you but belong to the living God, who created the universe by speaking. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge....
I you are really interested In scripture, you need to read verses on how women are supposed to dress. And then get you a modest skirt or a dress on. Maybe that will help you a little bit in that area.
