Navigating Trust and Safety as Survivors of Sexual Trauma - Bear VS Man

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There's a video going around on TikTok asking the question "Would you rather run into a bear or a man in the woods?" It has sparked a really interesting… and affirming, yet alarming conversation. Today, I want to dive into that from a bit of a different angle.
For survivors of sexual trauma or harassment, there is so much self-doubt around trusting our instincts and deciding if our feelings of unease are valid or if we are overreacting. In this video, I'll discuss how, regardless of history, we are shaped by experience, uncertainty, and fear and offer insight for navigating these complex emotions.
Share your thoughts in the comments below. I’d love to hear from you.
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Опубликовано:

5 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 11

@PeggyOliveiraMSW 4 месяца назад

Share your thoughts in the comments below. I’d love to hear from you. -------------- Returning to Wholeness Journal Course for Healing Childhood Trauma courageousjourneys.com/courses/returningtowholenessjc Get your FREE Letting Go meditation (Guided Meditation) courageousjourneys.com/f/letting-go-meditation _________ Connect with me facebook.com/courageousjourneys www.tiktok.com/@courageousjourneys instagram.com/peggyoliveira www.courageousjourneys.com

@barbaramulhall9470 4 месяца назад

While I fully understand why someone would say I'd choose the bear over the man as one would expect to be mauled by the bear and not the man. I was glad to hear you acknowledge that not all men are unsafe or abusive. As a trauma therapist who works with all genders and identities, I've learned how boys and men also have and are abused. With healing, I've learned to trust in my own gut instinct and the red flags and not live from my threat system and expect abuse. I fully believe that we need to work collectively to deal with the issues of childhood abuse and sexual violence in our society, as working together will help to change the level of abuse in society. I am not a Tiktok user, so I didn't see the thread around bear vs. man. Your video is certainly thought-provoking!😊 I wouldn't walk in the woods alone, which probably stems partly from my own abuse but also from a sense of staying safe as a woman, l guess another take on the bear vs. man. Thanks for the video ❤

@PeggyOliveiraMSW 4 месяца назад

I'm with you, I don't think I'd be walking in the woods alone either. 😊 "I fully believe that we need to work collectively", YES! Thank you for sharing and being a part of the collective to help change expectations and realities. ❤️

@NiNa-mn8yf 4 месяца назад

Thank you for expressing that the reasons why it would feel safer to run into the bear are valid. I appreciate this so much. I’d always believe a bear is much more predictable, and I also know this is not fair towards the majority of men. I do not mean to hurt any man’s feelings by saying this. But there are some who are the reason for my choice.

@PeggyOliveiraMSW 4 месяца назад

It can be so hard to try to hold both, our fears and realities and the feelings of men who take it personally. The truth is, we can feel what we feel and fully acknowledge the reality in which we live. As we all continue to talk more openly, more and more men will begin to understand so they don't take it personally if a woman is a little leery. This is the path to all of us being able to feel a little safer in the world. ❤️ Thank you for sharing.

@Tim_G_Bennett 4 месяца назад

As a man this whole bear thing makes me want to talk to women even less, I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. Going out anywhere and feeling like I'm viewed as a threat isn't good, I can understand why women feel the way they do, it just seems to be best to keep to myself.

@PeggyOliveiraMSW 4 месяца назад

Part of how women, or any group of people, become less afraid is, in part, by having open conversations. A man who is willing to have this type of conversation, to listen and understand fears and concerns is such a significant part of women being able to feel safe. As such, you are part of the healing we can experience collectively. ❤️ I don't think it's better for women or for you to keep to yourself. 😉 Thank you for being part of the conversation. Thank you for being a man who is willing to understand.

@al9834 4 месяца назад

Hi, thank you for your videos, where i can do a personal question? Is very important to me

@PeggyOliveiraMSW 4 месяца назад

You're very welcome. I'm glad they're helpful. If you have a general question I can do a video on, you can send it to qanda@courageousjourneys.com. If you have a question for advice on a personal/specific situation, unfortunately, I'm not able to offer that as there are too many unknowns since I don't know you, your history, or your circumstances.

@lindsaysiek3100 4 месяца назад

After being attacked as a child and as an adult i don't feel safe anymore but if u play dead the bear would leave u be. i openly tell people im a lesbian and i still get hit on and my but has been grabbed at work by customers that r men i would trust a lion more than i trust everyone that has been said or done but i would trust an animal over any person at this point most people are horrible

@PeggyOliveiraMSW 4 месяца назад

There are certainly a lot of incredibly horribly behaving people in the world. Though I truly don't believe that to be the case for most (men or women). I'm sorry this has been your (and so many of our) experience(s). ❤️ Thank you for sharing.