Nelson Sullilvan departed earth a few hours after making this video. Video by Nelson Sullivan; edited by Steve Lafreniere for an exhibit at the Gavin Brown Enterprise in New York City in the early 2000s
It warmed my heart seeing this video, hearing him talk about having a great day and how beautiful it is and how they're "happy dogs" with Blackout, knowing he'd be dead not long after. I mean we truly have evidence that his last moments were quite amazing.
Same, I think he knew. They say when death is near you can feel it. The vibe, the way he talks, the way he records everybody else it’s like he’s taking it all in.
Nelson Sullivan died exactly 35 years ago today. I wonder what his soul thinks knowing that people are watching his videos all these years later. I'm grateful to him for having given us a unique view of New York as it once looked.
That was his last sunset. What a moment! I loved that he loved his life; his house; his friends; his vines at the door; his dog; and his dinner. I could tell something was up because he was sweeting and breathing heaving when he went into the house. 32 years later and you still have fans.
I was lucky to be visiting his neighborhood last year during the 4th of July, 2019. Being 30 years since his death, I laid some flowers of remembrance early 4th of July morning beside the doorstep of what used to be his home, which is now an art gallery. I’ve watched most of his video recordings, and felt that laying some flowers beside his doorstep was the best way i could thank him for recording so much unedited footage of past life in NYC. Thank you, Nelson, for your dedication and Rest In Peace
I'm glad to know his last day was spent with good friends, good food, his pup, his camera and a last look at his beautiful city. These videos have captured a very interesting time in history. RIP Nelson.
Michael Gonzalez the time is interesting to you because you are young I presume? If you were around ball them you know there wasn't much difference between then and now other than the better technology we have, but it was the same as now otherwise.
@@liberalbias4462yeah I thought the same thing. If had known he would definitely of went to the hospital. You can tell Nelson Sullivan absolutely loved life and lived it to the fullest
@@liberalbias4462 The comment obviously meant that if he knew this would be his last day, he would still do the same because he did what he loved. It was not mentioned that he would know what would take him away so he could do something about it. Not sure if people in YT comments are just very autistic or just dumb moodkillers. Whatever.
I have never taken the view that Nelson "knew" he was about to die. This was a figure of speech and people enjoy reading into it simply because it adds more drama and poignancy to his demise. He speaks about quitting his job to devote to his upcoming public access show and all of his friends speak to support this- he was not thinking he was going to die soon, it's utter nonsense. It's just romantic to pretend that he did.
+William Byron - That's the truth. Nelson had quit his job working at the music shop (he was a classically-trained pianist) and all the talk about "not having to run around anymore" was a comment made in regard to it being his last day of taking it easy as there was plenty of running he had left to do thanks to his new public access show. While even I notice the fatigue and can tell that he was sluggish and slightly off kilter in his physical demeanor and presence in this video, him mentioning that he was going to miss Christina, was going to be interviewing all of his friends and showing all the glamorous nightlife that the city had to offer, ect, I think to him, he simply felt tired and sluggish. Like you said, people like to romanticize his death with the events that they perceive in this video, but Nelson had no plans (at least at the point of recording this video) to not be around. He was excited for the future and unfortunately, never got to fully realize his vision and it's a damned shame. On the flip side, though, these videos he recorded have made him more famous in death than he was in life, and that's saying something, because everyone who was anyone in the NY club scene knew who Nelson was.
His house is still there, and so is the vine he planted. It's now one of the most expensive and trendy neighborhoods in the city. I can't even imagine what he'd think if he saw it.
When Nelson says this is the "last day" he'll have to "not be running around", all that means is that he's about to start the next phase of his life- namely, starting his public access show featuring his footage. In May of 2022, Michael Musto confirmed that people are romanticizing and reading too much into this and thinking Nelson somehow "predicted" his death- it's nonsense. He had quit his job and cashed out his retirement- he was full of life and wanted to do so much more. I understand that makes it more tragic and it's easier to think he knew the end was coming, but- don't get the narrative of Nelson and what he stood for wrong. Nelson is immortal now and we're all the better for it.
Only took 20 years (they were discovered in 2000s) for his dream to finally become a reality. Although I'm sure he never would've thought how far his videos could reach.
He would be 72 now but died at the young age of 41. With his videos he was a pioneer. His videos are time capsules, and he will be forever young. R. I. P.
He definitely looked exhausted and sick that day! He also looked like he was a little concerned/worried about something! It was like he somewhat knew his end was near! Poor guy, he was a gentle soul! 🥺
No, just born for his time. Anyone who had VHS cameras at the time videotaped exactly like this. It's just that most people either lost the tapes over the years or if they still have them, we just never had them digitized. Anyone who had a VHS camera in the 80s was doing this, basically, almost every day.
2:56 "It's July the 3rd and it's the last day I'm going to have... not to be running." After binge-watching a ton of his videos and becoming invested in his life, that sentence hit pretty hard. RIP.
Agree! Addictive, aren't they. It's a shame in a way that one of the people in his closer circle didn't run withe baton, as it were, and continue documenting daily life in the aftermath of his demise, and beyond. It must have been so distressing to his friends, though, so i suppose everyone was too sad and shocked to think of it. When the curtain falls on the last video, you feel you want to know what happened next. What happened to his pets, his apartment, his friends.
I hope Nelson knows that thousands of people around the world (3 decades later) are loving his vidoes of the 1980s in NYC. What a treasure!!! Thank you Nelson (and the people how kept his films safe and put them online)!!!
Poignant that Blackout was the last shot of this amazing viewing of a bygone era. Blackout was a stray puppy that came up to Nelson during the infamous blackout of 1977, they were inseparable until Nelson's passing. RuPaul, Larry T, Lahoma all took care of him until he died a year later. Nelson indirectly succeeded he made this series for an audience. Glad he was surrounded by friends in his last hours.
How interesting. I did not know that was how he got the nane Blackout or how he ended up with the sweet dog. So odd to think i was in utero while that blackout occured. And in NYC no less.
"new york is so cynical, bill. do you think they'd be able to handle me walking around talking to my camera like this? i think they can handle it but they cant hide their disgust, a lot of them." oh baby dont worry we are all doing what you were doing back then 🥲
Even without video stabilization, his filming game was and still is lightyears better than many today. And props to him for being able to hold that 50 pound camera with one hand for so long.
My guy had hernia surgery from carrying those rocket launcher recorders. This video isn't long enough.. the day wasn't long enough for Nelson either 😢🖤💐
The cameras we're not that heavy back then and it's actually easier to stabilize a big object than a little one. But yeah he is good especially when walking
He was the original vlogger. Everyone is doing it now but he was 35 years ahead of them. I really enjoy his videos. They really capture life in those times.
mascottie Just so happened to come across his videos and yes he's way ahead of his time. He's the original vlogger. He started it all. Hate that he passed.
mascottie all videos today focus more on the individual and are rather vacuous and narcissistic. these videos capture friends and local life as if you were really there now,it's so sad he died after this was made.
i can’t even imagine being bill, ru, or bunny on that day. knowing you hung out with your dear friend just 12 hours before and had such a nice time. such a normal, ordinary day. and then he was gone. rest in peace nelson. thanks for sharing 1980s new york with us
We need a documentary on Nelson. There isn't one yet is there? More people need to see his work. I'm sure everyone would appreciate this video time capsule of 80s New York City life. I'm sure Ru and everyone appreciate that they got to spend his last day with him.
I came across Nelson when his McDonalds in 1989 video popped up on my YT feed. Since then I have gone on to watch many more of his videos and feel close to him and blackout. I admit I balled my eyes out watching this one - I wonder what he would have gone on to achieved and experienced if he had continued to live. I also cried for blackout lol, I could imagine how sad he must had been when Nelson passed as it was clear that Nelson loved blackout. Thank you though Nelson for introducing me to this whole new world before I was even born. It gives you an appreciation for your life and the time you have when you are reminded that life went on before you were born and will Continue to do so long after you are gone. Thank you to Dick also for keeping these videos safe and sharing them with us. I hope you both, along with blackout rest in peace.
The McDonald's video was my first time gett- ing to know the exciting and eccentric world of John Nelson Sullivan. May he be resting eternally with our Lord and Savior. What an incredibly interesting man that he was. 🥺
The other day was a trip: I had my convertible top down, when a storm suddenly came and started sprinkling inside the car going down the highway. I was pissed. When for some strange reason, I pictured Nelson in the car filming this. I go: "Nelson! It's sprinkling in the car and I have no where to pull off the road." then Nelson replied: "I know, isn't it nice??" That's when I realized it's just water and it will soon dry. Which it did, after 10mins the skies were clear again. You can't be in control of everything all the time.
@@pookiebear631 if you notice from his videos in the early 80s to 1989 his health declined and he looked more and more tired and sluggish.. I don’t think he knew he was gonna die specifically the next day but I certainly think he knew his time was coming
I'm sad he died that night but this video is really beautiful. A nice peaceful walk around the neighborhood with Blackout followed by a bbq with good friends, kind of a perfect way for Nelson to sped his final day on earth. RIP
They did have a beautiful back yard. There's something so calming yet exciting about it, like you could be on a beautiful English garden one minute, and then onto the busy New York streets the next.
I'm pretty sure people thought it was pointless and weird taping everything then but now it's a work of art and it captured how life was back in the day. Being 22 and seeing this footage only makes me wonder even more how life was back then. Damn New York when it was still affordable to live there but also assuming it was very dangerous as well...
It was a hellhole. That's why it was so affordable, even in now choice downtown areas that only multi-millionaires could ever hope to afford. That's why it was such a cultural laboratory from the early 60s through the mid 90s. In the early 1960s most middle class and above residents had fled to the suburbs, or at least the outer boroughs, and by the mid 1990s most of New York was turning around, cleaning up and being taken over by multi-national conglomerations led by shysters like Trump. That 35 year period between 1960 and 1995 was both New York's best and worst period in its history at the same time. It's something that can never be replicated again.
I visited in 1986, and one thing I remember most is all the abandoned, and stripped down cars which had been burned out. Just like in the movie Escape from New York.hah
I'd go once a month for a weekend in the late 80s and had a blast! Yea, a big male prostitute broke my windshield for snapping a pic, but nothing else bad ever happened and I always walked or used the subway. We'd shop all day and club all night.
I think the turnaround for NYC was an event for something which would draw millions of visitors to the city to an ongoing event. I was thinking it was the statue of Liberty restoration weekend event in 1986, but that was much too soon.
You can tell something was off when he came back from that walk. It's like the life was sucked out of him. So tragic. These videos have been amazing. I'm so glad I got to view these.
Nelson had on/off depression. Actually typical for him as witnessed by family and friends. He could have high spirits one minute and in the mental gutter the next. In relation to his mental health, mamy have baselessly speculated he died by suicide. Nelson most likely died from genetic heart failure.
Death is a weird thing when you think about it, I've seen people walking around and talking that looked like there was nothing wrong with them and then hours later they were gone. A guy I know personally told me he had a headache one day and I didn't think anything about it then he died later that night from it because it was actually an anyerusm he was having
my uncle was on the spectrum. he felt tired and wanted to lie down. my grandmother went to fix him some food. she came back and he was gone. heart failure. happened this may... he was one of my best friends.
1980s dude Yes we all did I posted another comment on this page of how great it was I lived on Leroy and St. Luke’s place in the mid-70s into the early mid 80s then I I went to Ireland for a couple of years and live there by the time you get out I came back it was way out of control I’m appreciative that I was able to experience it in those times where it wasn’t a kings ransom to pay monthly rent my area there Was all artists & Italian .
He was in good spirits that day. He talked about how beautiful everything was. He seemed happy and in a good place in life. Let's hope we all have a good one on our last day like he did.
So much foreshadowing symbolism in this video. He keeps mentioning that tomorrow is July fourth, the day of his death. He mentions that he is going to miss his friend, they watch the sun set together, like the sun is setting on his life. Everything he says has to do thematically with letting go and things ending. Life is better written than movies sometimes. Rest in peace Nelson
I've watched this video several times and it touches me every time. Firstly, I don't believe he knew he was going to die. I just don't get that vibe. But what I did notice is that he is struggling with his breathing and doesn't look well.
@@dylanblongworth His face was also flushed. Sweating and heavy breathing and a flushed face are all signs of a heart attack. They can last for hours before the person even knows something is wrong. They really only happen suddenly in the movies.
@@KennyWankpot my uncle's heart attack was quick. A lot of them aren't though. my grandpa had a slower one. Symptoms can start out pretty mild and grow over time. it just depends.
I’m happy to have found Nelson on RU-vid. He looked not totally well in this final video. I wish he could’ve lived a very long life. He was quite the interesting, intelligent guy. I’m sorry to all that loved him & feel his loss.
When my grandmother died of a heart related illness my uncle said something I will never forget...he said her heart didn’t give out on her, she just used it up with the immense amount of love she had for everyone esp her family...I hazard a guess that nelson used his all up in his short 41 years...rip to a man beyond his time
Sigh, this was heartbreaking because my dog of 12 years passed away and before he got sick and I had no choice but to move out due to toxic family. He and I used to watch Nelson’s vlogs every night. It hurt to watch this back in April 2021 but now it’s heartbreaking to watch it without my dog in June 2021. Rest In Peace tobi 5/6/21 12:55pm. Love you.
Nelson your memory lives on in your amazing artistic video diaries of the fabulous 1970s & 1980s New York City and I hope your looking down on New York City and admiring your famous friends who made the long hard road to stardom. I miss you and your friends not living life in NYC and you making films about there lifes through your video diaries, you left such a cool legacy behind you and everyone who is artistic love your films. Peace & Love from Craig - London - UK. Xx.
"It's July 3 and it's the last day I'm going to have... not to be running." It's odd and kind of eerie. Maybe he somehow knew more than he told the camera. I just know I'm so, so thankful for his prescience. When someone is so far ahead of the curve that their little dot on the chart, they sometimes get overlooked or even forgotten. Nelson was a vlog pioneer, two decades before the term even existed. I am so grateful that this channel exists. Thanks so much to the people who have done the work to make these tapes available on youtube!!
MerynCadell I agree! Nelson capturing a little bit of history, you get to really feel this little niche of NYC. This is the first time in history that regular people began vlogging their life. You really get a sense of those times, more than anything anyone could write. And again thank you for uploading Nelson's work!
It's sad because you can see in this video that Nelson looks run down and he's definitely tired. He's yawning, says he doesn't wanna run... he starts to walk out to the front of his street to get a panoramic view and then abruptly decides not too... and then when he's yawning when talking about his vine... you can just see it in his eyes... I hope he knew and was able to find peace because he was such a wonderful, kindhearted guy. RIP Nelson. Thank you for your hard work and efforts to give us both a glimpse into and a reminder of the past.
I have enjoyed time traveling with Nelson for more than two years now. I live in NYC myself, and I have taken these videos with me (on my iPhone) to literally follow in his footsteps, to see the locations as they exist today. His home stands empty right now, but, from what the neighborhood folk have told me, it was converted into a restaurant over a decade ago. Then that restaurant closed. I so wish that 5 Ninth Avenue (with its still thriving vines!) could be used as a drag museum. Or a museum specifically for his videos. I love how Nelson saw his neighborhood and the square as beautiful. I wonder, with all of the gentrification, upscale shops and restaurants, and gorgeous planters everywhere, if he would still consider this square as beautiful. Somehow, I doubt it. I think Nelson had the singular gift (a necessary one, too, for any true lover of the city) of seeing the beauty within this city's flaws. To the person(s) who post these, thank you. These videos are priceless...and I have spent many, many hours already watching and rewatching them. One final question: Does anyone know where Blackout ended up after Nelson died? Who cared for him?
The LADY WINIFRED Channel Following his steps with a phone is such a great idea. I'm definitely going to try this the next time I'm in NYC. I love Nelson's videos.
The LADY WINIFRED Channel I Google earth everything, since I live no where near NYC. But if I get the chance, I will definitely leave some flowers on the steps of iconic halfway house of Nelson's. If only Florent was still open! I often wondered about Blackout too. Nelson had so many friends, I know Blackout must have ended up in a good home.
The LADY WINIFRED Channel the owners of this channel have posted on another video....that Lahoma and Larry Tee continued to live in Nelson's house after his death, and that RuPaul moved into the first floor, and together, they all took care of Blackout, until he died a few years after Nelson. i'm envious of you, that you have walked in Nelson's paths where all of these videos were shot. it's on my bucket list to someday do the same. thanks for sharing your story.
i have a request to the wonderful Lady.....if you decide to again retrace Nelson's steps, ....perhaps you could video tape yourself doing so.....so the rest of us who may never get to NYC could see those places as they are now?
It would be awesome if you combine your footage and Nelson’s in one video. Nice ! I bet you enjoyed that walking. I’m from Iraq and I never lived in New York yet I enjoy Nilssons videos so much
It is possible that he could have had HIV/AIDS but died of a heart attack. While I do agree that he clearly does have lesions on his face in some of his videos he was no where near as thin as someone who is in the last stages of AIDS and his death was recorded as being from a heart attack.
I have breathing problems and when I experience dyspnea, I yawn A LOT. The doctor explained it as “aid hunger” and said the main reason people yawn when not getting enough oxygen is because it forces in a deeper, fuller breaths, and can also help oxygenate blood. So it could’ve been that he wasn’t getting enough oxygen for sure. Which is definitely a sign of heart conditions.
Yeah, I noticed the difference from the start to the end. He looked perfectly fine in the beginning of this video, and by the end he was very pale and sweaty. Very similar to what I noticed in my father, leading up to his heart attack. As much as a month before 7/4/19 I said you him, you dont look right. He’s very stubborn and ignored me. Well while surfing on the morning of July 4th around 630am he had a heart attack. Luckily he survived it, but had 3 blocked arteries, so he is very fortunate to have survived.
Idk It is July 3rd and summers in nyc are hot and humid. There are times you feel the thickness of the air. But, the yawning is what I found odd. It is also one of the telltale signs, but generally ignored.
I find Nelson's video's so incredible. We're watching a world that no longer exists from all corners of the world on devices which would be inconceivable at the time, and yet no one is documenting their lives like he did. I feel for him, I feel for Blackout, and I can't express how much I am grateful to look into his life. Thank you for sharing this, thank you RuPaul for sharing updates on what occurred and thank you Nelson for documenting a world you knew to a world you never saw.
I'm glad his friends took care of his pets after he passed to the very end. It's traumatizing for animals to suddenly lose their person but it is even more traumatizing to lose everything and to have to start over.
It actually made me pretty sad to watch this whole video. We control so very little really, life can walk out the door at any moment, we can't control that. We should stop trying to always have control, start enjoing life a little bit more
Ghost Immaculate ..he does ghost....I would have loved to meet him....even tho i was only ten when he pass3d....Someone should do a documentary on his life.
I have a big heart for Nelson even though I never met him. Blackout was cool. I admire people like Nelson that can make a good life for himself and for others. I was 20 when he passed away and I was so lost. I'm 50 now and I'm still so lost. These films he made are treasures.
The vine in front of his house is a wisteria, beautiful flowers, hell anywhere near foundations and sidewalk's. You can let it grown in a vine, tree, or bush depending on how you care for it. Regardless it'll grow after being planted. Very fitting for Nelson, wild and free.
I've watched this video so many times...each time I cry...what a gift he gave to so many people...you are loved and missed...bless you dear sweet beautiful man...
@@Okbroski He had been clean and sober since 1984. He also wasn't promiscuous and didn't go sleep with every twink out there. Nelson got AIDS from Heroin use in the 70s and Early 80s.
@@Tornado1994 Yeah, probably so, and HIV was present, and I'm sure he did have sex. He looks as though he had HIV. Combined with poor diet, and other ailments, it's very likely it was too stressful for his heart.
He said :"t's the last day I'm going to have "... He continues almost as saying goodbye to his favorite place in NYC ,the Meatpacking district, randomly remembering all the good stuff from the 70's and few best friends like Christina.... RIP Nelson your body may have gone but your spirit lives On.
ssarryo Might have been something he was born with, and then burning his candle at both ends might have brought his death sooner. They did party for days on end. LOL
+alexziggyful I like Nelson and I respect his work and am grateful for it but it was a cocaine overdose, plain and simple. And I am sad to say that but he died from acute cocaine intake.
+ssarryo Common knowledge if you're familiar with Nelson's story and the people associated in his life and even Musto has referenced it in public twice, once jokingly. He was with an escort snorting and granted, a heart attack resulted from it, but the cause was cocaine.
I find this guy fascinating. As others stated, he really was ahead of his time in that nobody was really doing this kind of stuff back then. If you watch a lot of his videos, every once in awhile Nelson talks about how some people are so weirded out when they see him doing his thing. I love that he didn't care, and continued to do what made him happy. I took a lot of enjoyment in watching the one video where you see someone holding a camera and shooting HIM walking around. As odd as it seems to say this about a guy holding a camera and filming himself, he seemed almost graceful and dancer like in how he did it lol. As a guy who grew up in those days, despite being heterosexual and not knowing what a rave is, I appreciate his culture, and what the guy found interesting to shoot. Most importantly, he seemed like a really nice person. R.I.P. Nelson, I hope you're annoying everyone in heaven with your camcorder. Keep the footage on ice for the rest of us to watch someday dude.
Son Goku you were killed by piccolo and sacrificed yourself to save the earth from cell. You’ve been to the other world before. You’ve seen it for yourself
“It’s July 3rd, and it’s the last day I’ll have without running.” This phrase struck me deeply. It carries a sense of urgency and reflection. Sometimes, in our final moments, we realize the importance of seizing every instant, of not letting opportunities slip away. May we cherish each day, even when we’re not literally running, but rather living intensely. RIP Nelson Sullivan
Just goes to show you never know when it’s your time to go, life is precious, and we shouldn’t take it for granted. I adore Nelson, I just found his channel, but my first impression were how genuine, loving, and free-spirited he seemed. “It’s going to be my last day.. not running.” God is definitely real, and I hope he’s at peace in paradise with his adorable Blackout. 💕🙏🏾
I'm glad that he went to a place like the pier that he really loved and admired the beauty of the water and Manhattan island the day before he died. Its things like that, we must all take in and really admire about the beauty of the world we live in and the life we've been given because you never know when that day will be your last day on Earth. It seemed like a beautiful ending to the last chapter of his life.
Something in the energy is telling me he was sick and took his life into his own hands. He knew for some time and made these films for his friends cos, he really loved life and his friends so much .
Blissfully unaware. Such a short life but a very full and colorful one. Nelson didn’t even seem to be feeling bad or anything that day. I’m so appreciative of the 5 Ninth Avenue Project for these amazing capsules of time. ♥️🙏🏼💫
This was in my recommendations can't believe he died of a heart attack the next day in this video his face does look flushed and not well in the beginning and he's out of breath through most of it I wonder did he know he had any problems with his heart
it is sad to watch the video knowing that he would die some hours later. I am very touched about his videos and how life was interesting in NYC back in the day. Nelson was a visionary and he would be famous in this current era of RU-vid video bloggers. RIP Nelson thank you for the interesting video collection.
I cannot believe Nelson left this earth just the morning after this was filmed. He was a true visionary and will live on in our hearts and through these time capsules forever.
