NOOB'S GUIDE to VOLKMAR the GRIM 

I'm Guvenoren, the creator of the 2 mods highlighted here, I am very happy to see that I am not the only one who craved white mustache for volkmar! Thanks! Thank you so much for high-lighting White mustache and Foundation skill trees mods that I have worked a lot on! A thousand times thanks!

The Grim cruising the Undead countryside in his Volkswagon.

You may be badass, but youll never be "Ripped myself from the banner of a Greater Daemon and beat the bird shit out of him with the very chains that held me there " badass.

TWELVE THOUSAND ANGRY MEN WITH CHAINS JUDGING YOUR HERESY INTENSIFIES, LED BY A MAN ON A PIMP WAGON

"So when you start your next Empire campaign and pick Karl Franz for the 127th time" This is so true, Karl Franz gives his consent.

We need a mod that enlarges his moustache by 1000% and changes his name to "Stachemar the Groomed".

_"You can't win Archaon. If you strike me down, I'll return, more powerful than you can possibly imagine."_ -Volkmar. Quite literally, it seems.

In the Empires defense, literal witches are in fact a big problem so Witch Hunters make a lot of sense. Also the Sisters of Sigmar exist who have their own separate orders doing their own separate thing. Usually smashing faces with hammers, as a proper Sigmarite is want to do.

It's also interesting that Volkmar's research is essentially Archeon's early life. He may have become another Everchosen if the Endtimes hadn't happened.

"Proto-Talos" That's a good one! 😂

Ah, Volkmarr. The man who walked out of a city, and told Mannfred's entire army to fuck off. And they did. What a lad.

Just as a note there are actually a group of Sigmarite nuns They were called the sisters of Sigmar or some thing but most of them got wiped out during a war with the Skaven I think

Ah, Volkmar. The answer to the question "what if Jesus and Bismarck had an angsty kid?"

you get a like for "Womb Broom"

BY SIGMAR, YES.

Can i just note how weird it is that we got Knights of the Blazing Sun, a Myrmidian order, in a dlc with Volkmar?

1:14 For those who’ve played Vermintide 2, that right there is the exact image the statue at the end of Last Stand is based on.

Proto Talos, finally someone said it

Literally every Empire campaign I do, I make Volkmar the Elector of Sylvania so he can spend his retirement bashing the remaining zombie heads in.

Proto-Talos?...By the Nines! Loving these noobs guides, even if I don't have the game(I probably saw one of the videos because I follow Total War content from older games). I'm following the channel from a couple of months now, quality content and great humor!

"pick Karl Franz for the 127th time" You don't understand, he buffs Reiksguard, and I love them!

I've been kicking tomb king and khorn ass with this guy in the immortal empire campaign

I just wait for the skav... i mean rat beasymen to eat kislev. When the faction dies you get a new quest to just raid the area that used to be bearland.

I'll admit, I loled just like I do with the other ones. Great work man great work! Still hoping for Grombrindal's noob's guide, the angriest dwarf to ever live. So angry he came back from the dead, so god damn angry that no matter where your other dwarf armies go on the world. They can still hear on the wind him screaming at them to go farther, fight harder, and stop being such a bitch about that axe in their gut. No seriously he got skills that affect the entire faction for replenishment, movement distance on the map, recruitment discount, higher ranks for new recruits, and so on...which is again every army you got. Which makes me think of some army on the other side of the world somehow still hearing that old Dwarf giving them angry grandpa encouragement to settle some grudges. All the while his own army of dwarves are just staring at their leader screaming and frothing with unbrindaled rage into the sky, Out of all the dwarf Lords he is by far my favorite just for the sheer amount of stuff he gives you as a reward, add onto him being still dangerous as hell on the field of battle and it just a win win really. Also his lines in his quest battles are pretty funny.

2:25 That's a great way to put them. Also now I want Armor-clad cheerleaders

An entire faction that thinks Wrath of the Lich King was the best WoW expansion? Shit, I didn't realize I was a follower of Volkmar.

0:20 i've laughed Ho damned yes, i remember of Henry Caill with a mustache. . .it was a curious choice.

When even your staff has a hammer on it

3:42 😂this makes my life

4:30 That Discworld reference just solidified my fandom for this channel.

Volkmar's redo is so nice and I actually prefer him over Karl. Cuz boosting Free Company is so fucking good.

Volkmar the Hammer Pope! Lord of high quality moustaches.

'Yeah, one day there will be a battle, and one side will win' - Volkmar 2020

The music for this DLC is epic.

Okay, guys, hear me out here, I think Volkmar's partially based on the Ottoman Sultan Selim the Grim. Here's why: Selim's known for two major accomplishments, being a successful commander who basically never stopped campaigning and winning until he died of sickness, and being a very religious man who claimed the office of the Caliph for the Ottoman crown and became the head of the Sunni Muslim faith, then got up and kept fighting. Now, the Cult of Sigmar's clearly based on Christianity, as the Empire's based on the Holy Roman Empire and it borrows heavily from German examples in most cases, including the flagellants mentioned in the video, but the popes were not warriors (except Julius II, who led his own troops to battle while fighting the French), which may have been what motivated GW to reach for a fightier alternative when creating a Battle Pope to lead the Battle Priests. Moreover, Volkmar has the same style of mustache that Selim bore, particularly resembling the one in the famous profile-portraits of the man that turn up on the first page when you search his name on Google. Which is what first led me to suspect this. Oh, and, he's got the same moniker. The religious leader of a vast empire called "the Grim" would already be a decent coincidence. Combined with the rest, it feels like a tad more than coincidence.

Always look forward to this content the most... can’t say how many times I died laughing listening to Repanse and Malus! Please keep it going my man!!!

I swear i sensed the spit reach me through the internet when he said "Pope mobile of death"

Volkmar's story did not end after Storm of Chaos, because he had one more moment of titanium-balled chadness still in him. After Archeon was sent packing, eternal fuck-up and all around worst character of the setting Mannfred Von Carstein saw how weakened the Empire was and decided he would strike while the iron was hot. He reached Middenheim, at which point he marched up to the city gates where Karl Franz was waiting for him and told him to surrender or die. At that moment, a single magnificently bald moustached legend marched out of the city, parked himself between Karl and Mannfred and told Mannfred that the last time a Von Carstein demanded a city surrender or die, a grand theogenist threw him and himself off the city walls, and by Sigmar he'd do it again if Mannfred didn't fuck off back to Sylvannia. And Mannfred did just that, so not only did Volkmar single-handedly prevent a vampire invasion and siege of Middenheim, he also bought the Empire nearly 3 months of peace after years of war. Absolute gigachad.

That was awesome thanks for the mod suggestions

I love these. After each one I want to play that faction just for the laughs!

Even if you don't know the lore you know he's definitely the leader of hammer wielding bishops when even volkmars staff even has a mini hammer on it

I always just have volk handle the VC by himself while karl franz and Gelt tag team the empire into submission and maybe even add a few princedoms to their kill count...then an alliance with dwarfs to keep chaos at bay.

Very nice video! I am excited for daddy Gelt, the SUPEREME PARTIARCH!! Or daddy Louen.

Crossbreed the Pope with the Iron Sheikh. You sir earned your Like and Love early in this video DAMN!

Choas Boiz: “heh heh, wrap inner gee.” VOLKMAR, miles away: *_”... I can SMELL the Heresy! ”_* 🎩 🐍 no step on SNEK! 🇺🇸🇭🇰

Surprised you didn't mention his death in the End Times. It was... not great.

Just finished a volkmar playthrough, by the end game you can solo armies with him

Actually informative vid. Never thought of volkmar strategy like this

Both entertaining and educational - the best combo! ;)

You teach me so many new expression with these videos. I can't wait till I can use 'womb broom' in real life one day!

Yeah warhammer fantasy is really close to real history :D We have the Germans as the Empire, the French as Bretonnians, norsca as Vikings, Kislev as Poland/Russia And even Egyptians and the Aztecs 😁 And now even Cathay as China dont no why some people cry over Warhammer 3 because they cant get their Medieval 3 (which will come eventually)

There was also an Priest that was whoreshipped by many Peasants and gathered together 100k of Followers, many Peasants, Serfs but also Knights. It was during the First Crusade 1097 and they Killed and Plundered through whole Eastern Europe till they got too tired and ripped off. Then they got killed. I Think the Piest even survived this. But yeah that was the "Crusade of the People" or something similar called. Could also be an Conception for Volkmar

Been looking forward to this since you announced it on your live stream! Time to crush some heretics with that fabulous mustache!

After the last video I kinda wanna see Volkmar and Settra play bumper cars with their battlewagons. Lol

omg... That pope crossed with the iron sheik has opened my eyes to the truth

I do agree with your mod recommendation. They are splendid.

One man will fight against the darkness... Not alone, but with others

I actually just started the game with Volkmar but as I'm now informed on the mods I now know what to install. Thanks

So where did the picture of the Iron Sheik busting out of the crucifix come from?

For the record, Wrath of the Lich King WAS the best Addon!

I was hoping that you would bring up the Sisters of Sigmar 😅 good vid all in all

"womb broom" dear God my sides

The faith wasn’t founded by the nobles. It was founded by Johann Helsturm, a commoner.

I hope Volkmar leads an Imperial crusade in the north eventually.

A Premier? God dammit and here I was hopping that I would be entertained today but now I got to wait another 20 hours.

bonus meme points for the reign of chaos intro footage

I thought more of Paul von Hindenburg with that mustache. Or Erich Ludendorff. But again, I just LOVE your noobs guides. 🤩

He reeeeeeally needs an armour piercing buff for flagellants.

Thank you for the Mods suggestions! As much as I love TW:WH, there are bits and bobs that I feel need tweaking.

I love these videos. Maybe next you could do Tyrion or Teclis, the second most dynamic duo in all of warhammer.

'Mouth merkin' 😂 holy shit!!!

He is volkmar the reasonable after getting a snickers

stay safe we need you in this time of isolation

OMFG! The Iron Sheik as Volkmar!

i have never played this game but I have watched every one of your videos because your that entertaining I kid you not

Referencing Terry Pratchetts Discworld, Mony Python and more! Nice!

oh nononon. why do premieres lke this?! I just have nice beer, hoping for a nice video... 20 hours?! wht((

love these, be cool to get a video on gotrek and felix.

Am I the only one who only ever gets to recruit Volkmar after I already bodied the Vlad and his brother? The order of my shit list usually goes: Empire Secessionists, Skarsnik, then beeline it straight for the Sylvania before they and Azhag finish wiping out Elector Counts. Then run back east because Rakarth is destroying the Elector counts there.

The music made this video. Had me laughing throughout. Prosit!

well the "knights of the evil spark" weren't really the religious kind 😂😂

Anyone else here because of the recent teasers? It seems he was right and now we must trust in him to save us during the upcoming Chaos diddling.

YAY! Nice vid! ... ...so...Wulfric The Wanderer next?

Me, waiting for the video: I don't need it. I don't need it. I don't need it. Also me: I NEED IT!

Good call on Kislev

Lol love the music choice

Right, (cracks knuckles) it's time to make some heretics repent.

I'm loving the plate mail and other heavy armor they wear... But I just can't help but see Space Marines and Inquisitors.

I know it probably won’t happen but I would like CA give the LL from the first game their own starting location (or at leas make them be the ones on the diplomacy screen). I would be happy with only seeing them on the diplomacy screen too... (Isabella, Grombrindal and Volkmar)

Let’s be real...Wrath was the best WoW expansion

EGGHEAD LIKES HIS BOOKY-WOOK!!

Orangutan levels of strength to swing books around.... I see what you did there.

Man he should just always have sabatron playing in the background

If you are grim from 'just marauders fanfics'...This boi has a LOOOOOOONG way to go.

Oh boy a birthday present just for me!

6:33 pulling my heartstrings man

Can't wait for Ungrim!

Mouth mirkan had me fucking dying xD

Oh boy, here it comes

Gonna need to update this after immortal empires drops