Labelling your stapler and putting it in your drawer so no one will take it. Opening your drawer to find your stapler is gone. Searching the office for the stapler you distinctly remember labelling with your name so no one would take it. Finding your stapler and glaring at the person who took it who swears it just appeared on their desk and it wasn't them. Going to use the stapler with your name on it. Finding that there's no more staples left in your stapler. Opening your drawer to find the pack of staples you bought, confident that they are there. Finding that your pack of staples are gone. Wasting 25 minutes of company time to put one teeny tiny staple at the top of a three page document that someone will read and shred, moments later........ Then realising that you should have just sent it as an attachment to an email, marked URGENT.....
...and stuff up the shreader because they forgot to take out that one staple. Then having to break finger nails trying to get the staple out because you can't use a pair of scissors or a metal letter opener because you might electrocute yourself and/or blow the fuses in the entire building. Then, the person who started all this comes along and says "oh that was silly of you, wasn't it?" Where did I hide my valium? Aarrrgghhh 🤪
Trying to leave the office just before 5pm to catch a train/bus home and get "the look" from everyone. But you never get "the look" when you get to work early and go in on the weekends and work from home after dinner 😝.
The Tuna….OMG😂😂 In the public service I’ve now encountered people who are allergic to apples; deodorant sprays; citrus fruit; clear desk policies; actual work 😂… I’ve heard people ANSWER THEIR PHONE ON THE LOO!!!! Thank you Jimmy, clever and accurate as always.
You left out 17 pairs of shoes under a ladies desk, heels, flats, walking shoes knee high boots etc. They all stink. Same as uncleaned coffee stains on desks, office chairs that absorb farts. I am an electrician who works around all of that.
funny, I spilled a bottle of expensive perfume in my desk at my last corporate job (and i never returned to corporate life), and for me i still remember that as my experience, my office smelled DIVINE~ haha. there' s no need for 17 pairs of shoes, that's insane, keep them in your car. Actually, i'm not sure i even own 17 pairs of shoes nowadays.
Ah.... Jimmy....that brings back soooo many memories , especially my days working in the Head Office of one of Australia's "big 4" banks in Melbourne. Especially when the fire drill meant walking down 32 ( yes...32) flights of stairs...and for some weird reason every dozen floors or so, the stairs would change direction 🥺
We had an earthquake evacuation drill one time when I was living in New Zealand. They happened often, to train people, all good, but one time we all trudged down from the multiple floors above us, and arrived at the mezzanine floor to find the door was locked 🔒 Oh joy. Heads rolled for THAT little hiccup. The worst part was that we had to trudge back UP all those flights of stairs because we were not allowed to use the lifts starting from the floor above us. Life in NZ is interesting, especially when there is a REAL tremor and the building is built on rollers and has a 6 foot sway in each direction. I actually really love NZ. I have dual citizenship.
I'd LOVE to hear what you make of receptionists in medical practices and especially hospitals! I believe they're all going to heaven when they die because they've already had their share of hell, or so the story goes.
ditto. Keeping a spare pair of tights in the drawer, uh NO, no one bothers with that anymore. Fancy living in an age where women had to cover their bare legs!
I've got one for you Jimmy.... for the IT worker!!! Ticket marked ***URGENT*** but it's just someone who's forgotten their password because they're too lazy to remember it. Getting a ticket with a vague description like "computer problem" as opposed to a housekeeping request or something. Users who you overhear describing in great detail to another co-worker the problem they're having with Powerpoint not lining up images to text properly, but all you get in the ticket is "Powerpoint problem". And when you ask them to describe the problem they're suddenly mute. HR sending onboarding tickets for users who started 20 minutes ago despite a policy of giving 3-7 days advance notice. HR sending follow-up tickets that create extra tickets about the new person who started 20 minutes ago and NEEDS their password, despite the first day being paperwork and training anyway. HR getting frustrated at you because you've run out of Microsoft Office licenses because they haven't bothered to tell you who to offboard for 6 months, which would have freed up licenses. Having to troubleshoot the CEO's home WiFi network because he's the CEO and you can't tell him no. Having to drive out to the CEO's house to replace his WiFi router because....... you know. Having to drive out to the CEO's house at 3AM..... etc. Getting "MY EMAIL WAS HACKED!" tickets because the person sees their own name next to a fictitious email address and can't understand the concept of spoofing until you tell them "what if you put a return address label on an envelope with your neighbor's name on it?". Dealing with that guy who wants a new laptop and will try to break his to get it, just because new hires are getting shiny new ones. And giving him a refurb that's even worse as punishment for breaking his perfectly suitable laptop. Providing the WiFi password for the 389907394th time, even though it's posted in the break room. Delicately explaining to the CEO why you can't give him local admin privileges so he can install Bearshare or Limewire on a company computer. Delicately explaining to the CEO why PornHub is blocked. Delicately explaining to the CFO that you can't get him the latest and greatest MacBook because he cut your budget by 30%... and because this is a Windows environment. Getting a ticket with 6 different problems that the user has been sitting on for months because they didn't want to bother IT, but now the computer is completely crippled. Having someone reopen a ticket about Powerpoint from 6 months ago to submit a new issue about the accounting software because they're too lazy to find the IT email address and start a new email. Those rare instances where someone reopens a ticket just to say, "Thank you!" and make it worth dealing with the rest.
I've never worked in an office but I did do a week as work experience at highschool & found out on day 1 what a pecking order meant, as finally even the lowest intern had someone under them & all I did was fetch coffee/tea & empty bins. The office manager was a pretty cool & had a wicked sense of humor & when he asked how my 1st day went & I told him, instead of giving me the ' everyone starts at the bottom ' speech, he gave me a list of things he needed me to do & a clipboard & said anytime I got dragged of my list of allotted tasks for something frivolous, to make a note of it, by about smoko the next day I was no longer looking for left handed staplers or trying out how to make soya latte with 8 sugars, because I wielded the clipboard of power.
having a meeting while a fire drill is going on in the background and you're told you can stay where you are, one side trying to talk over the drill and the other trying to hear over the drill. Or better yet, waiting for disaster to strike so you can leave early but dammit that other building that's closer to ground zero can evacuate but you can't cos you're not close enough.
no he covered that with "microwaving tuna". I worked in an office many many moons ago and they banned heating up things in the micro, cos of one person.there's always One human who is a shit and justifies colonisation. just sayin'
JASON!! Thankyou so much for doing an office/reception one!! It's absolutely spot on, me & my office bestie ticked every one we related to.. Safe to say aww yepp! Ticked pretty much every one 😂😂 filled 2 pages of highlighted ticks 😂 this video will never get old. GOOD JOB JASON, 👍 👍 👍
Pretty glad I’m a massage therapist & not in an office….but we really have our own kinda weird! 😳🤦♀️😂 I’m just bad at controlling my face…so at least for part of the time clients are face down! 👍🏻😂
I worked in an office once and the advice I was given was don’t look out the window in the morning because you’ll have nothing to do in the arvo. Was the single most boring week of my life.🤣
2 vital things forgotten- hotdesking (shitdesking) and KP bloody I's......oh, and we have a dedicated milk fridge at my office, so lucky us! And who the hell reheats TUNA?!
So fun fact: actually used "as previously stated" once and it turned into a whole ordeal. Now I'm not allowed to talk to that person. Not for anything else in the email, just the words "as previously stated" was what sent them over. They say it doesn't snow in QLD but somehow we still get snowflakes.
Spending 100's over the years on bday gifts, parenthood gifts and farewell gifts for colleagues - and getting a card for your own farewell! "Deep Diving", "Holding the Pen", "While the Hood is Up", "Adding Colour" - urgh! Jimmy nails it again :)
Being on the 26th floor when fire drill goes off and not getting to elevator quick enough.no one reacting when real fire drill even though can smell smoke
We have a toilet that has solid walls compared to all the others that are cubicles I think it’s an unwritten and known but not talked about rule that that’s the popping toilet… 😂
You forgot "I will ESCALATE that" oh how I dislike that phase and the slow office worker walk with a couple of papers in their hand which they return to their desk with the same papers. I think they teach them that. Thank you so much Jimmy❤❤❤❤
I love using this phrase on the phone to customers- they feel all high & mighty until they realise it doesn't mean squat and the manager will actually tell them the same thing I told them earlier.....lolol
I work in an office but they company has done away with ‘cubicles’. Now it’s just one large open room with rows of computers for all the worker bees. Also really frustrating when I’m actually trying to get shit done but I can’t shut a door to block out the hideously annoying laugh from one of the other rows. Most relatable thing in this for me is the heater/air on situation! Most of us have electric heat packs at our desks because it’s fucking cold no matter what.
It seems Jimmy's too young to know how to use a rotary phone properly. There's no buttons mate. 😄 This was basically a description of my daily life when working in the office... except no mention of tech supports only solution to fixing your computer being: "Have you tried turning it off and back on again?"
Forgot about: Parents talking about their kids and trying make up for their empty lives by overinvesting in their kids (nobody cares little Jimmy won the under 10 grand final) Parents taking time off for kids Dr appointments, sports days, camp, concerts, teacher interviews etc. Everyone else needing to cover for them when they do. Kids in the office being a nuisance. Yep, I am childfree. Take the doggo in the office any day.
OMG the toe nail clippers! so freaking true. And the phrase I use ***all the time***, 'as per my previous email'! Also finally finding a spot in the fridge because no one ever throws their old lunch away/takes Tupperware home only, to have your lunch stolen and you now have to go to the cafeteria which you were trying to avoid. Also, sitting in the lunch room when you overhear your colleagues talking about you and they were too lazy to check around the corner to see if you're there - 🤦♂
Absolutely hilarious!!!!!!! Also peoole not cleaning microwaves and sandwich presses after use but still continue to use them even though it's looks like a perfect environment for salmonella!
I know someone who had the head of a department dream. He's now head of testing and has lost all ambition in life. This is terribly accurate (especially the coffee)🤣🤣
Debating whether to request extension of the 10 minute bathroom light sensor, without implying you take 10+ min bathroom breaks Realising I need 10000 steps fast to not be harassed at night or face the ignominious "overweight sacking".
All true brother, but 6 coffees? Come on man, that's just in the morning. Not to mention the horrifying noises you hear when you go to the toilet, and another cubicle is being used.
12 toilets half split between genders for a building of 900 people seriously no joke and consistency scared of catching something so you spend a minute putting paper over the seat and it just falls into the bowl as you sit if you need to do more then a number 1 otherwise you just squat
That coworker that overshares their medical details in the office, to the point that you stop even saying "good morning" because that's seen as an opening for them to tell you all about how it hasn't been good, they sat on the toilet with diarrhoea all night, as you try to move away
The loudest most obnoxious person in the office loudly asking if the wall between the offices could be taken down to make it more open plan, and everyone on the opposite side of the wall hearing her and looking at each other like "oh no"
