Part One: The Dumbest Coup In World History | BEHIND THE BASTARDS 

"Original Air Date: June 9, 2020" Well... this is going to be laced with retrospective foreshadowing.

I remember reading King Solomon's Mines when I was really young - maybe 2nd or 3rd grade? We had a bookshelf full of old classics from my grandma's Reader's Digest subscription, and I just got the impulse to pull it off the shelf one day. Even as a little brat with zero awareness of politics or social discourse, having the villain be an evil African witch doctor named fucking Gagool struck me as a bit gauche. Today, that brief feeling of immersion-breaking wrongness is one of the only things I remember about the book. A good rule of thumb: if your portrayal of other cultures makes a dumbass white toddler morally uncomfortable, you've probably done a racism.

Oh, a different Dumb Coup than the one I was expecting, I guess this is a re-archive - the one thing I'd do is announce the date of the podcast going forward though 😄

The Lion King riffing off King Solomon's Mines? More like both of them riffing off Hamlet.

Missed bilingual double-pun: Dog Perro-ignon ...sorry, I had to.

"The Dumbest Coup In World History" Now second-dumbest.

Regarding the first bit where they talk about King Solomon's Mines, to be fair, I don't think The Lion King was copying King Solomon's Mines with the whole "evil treacherous uncle becomes king and exiles his legitimate-heir nephew". I think both The Lion King and H. Rider Haggard were just ripping off Hamlet

How many people immediately looked up “Those were the days my friend” and felt a deep feeling of despair at the mental image. :(

I still use my Hotmail address....

And here I thought Fernando Poo was just something Robert Anton Wilson and/or Robert Shea spun up as a stand in for the concept of proxy war and not an actual historical place because the name is just so ridiculous. And come on, Ernesto Tequila y Mota as the name of a revolutionary who read a handbook on how to start a coup, and then started reading "The Prince" in order to learn how to actually run the place after taking over? Just hilarious creative writing, right? Wikipedia sure doesn't help much on that accord. I often have to remind myself that a) wikipedia and such are updated by volunteers and I know there are articles that are going to be wrong or incomplete (for instance, I know "I accidenty the whole soapcake" on fail-blog precedes the "I accidentally X" meme's "origin" of 2008 according to knowyourmeme by a few years and Google trends for accidenty agrees but I don't have the rest of the receipts and while I do have basically as much spare time as I want, I don't have enough spare time right now to hunt down the original and update things), and b) to RAW and RS the figures in Illuminatus! were somewhat fresh and the references as clear as pizzagate, "Fooled won't be fooled again", hanging chads, and "I feel your pain" are to me now but in 30-50 years the new generation is gonna see our various diatribes and, unless they dig deep, they aren't going to know which stuff is real and which stuff is just some BS off the top of our domes (bonus points if you caught which of those I made up). As frustrating as it is trying to figure out which parts of Illuminatus! are based on straight up fact, which parts are [the part of this real person/place/phenomenom will be played by clever pun and/or trickery], and which parts are entirely fictional/metaphorical, it is a source of endless joy for me that this particular gruelling task of trying to discern reality from trolling will be inflicted upon future generations, hopefully in part by my hand. I feel the urge to give this task some sort of Importance, some sense of Legacy, and I will justify that by saying that it is important to remind folks of the message on the painting in George's room: THINK FOR YOURSELF, SCHMUCK!

Okay I listen to a lot of Bastards episodes over the last few months and when the mercenaries started fighting the customs officials and hijacked the plane, is the first time my draw physically dropped in shock at what They did. There are bastards and there is outrageousness in naked contempt, that was amazing. I know there are bad people with little care for others life. But wow on that bit.

High stakes rugby where young men can risk their lives to hurt other people in a controlled, legal setting…. You just described American football

And there was me thinking you were were going to do mark thatcher's attemoted coup 😂

Awesome intro.

Could you maybe do an episode where you expand on your equivocating the USSR supporting workers' revolutions to capitalist imperialism? I've heard people who hated the USSR acknowledge that the leaders were true believers with regards to communism, so I was surprised to hear that they were engaged in imperialism.

As far as I’m aware you can still create a .hotmail account. But my primary email address is a .msn account. It has been sold many times over. On occasion I meet old people that still have and use their AOL email. Basically hotmail is not that old and all email is still an infant comparably.

I have only one minor nitpick. His name is Alan QUATER-main. Not Quartermain.

Totally off topic for the episode, but I did read somewhere that football was originally an attempt to work out young men's aggression in a less destructive way than war.

AKA "Let's put on a coup!"

I misread this as "the dumbest cop in world history" and I'm disappointed.

It was the year they finally immanetized the eschaton...

I thought this was about trump supporters trying to invade venezuela

Pretty fucked up when you learn about where the term Wild Geese" comes from

"As a kid I didn't realize that white people could have problems with other white people" Tell me you didn't grow up in Europe without telling me you didn't grow up in Europe.

Why would robert say che guevara wasnt great? Sounss pretty liberal

King Solomon's Mines: A White Liberalism Novel

Did ya just call Tito the liberator of Yugoslavia, who stood up to western imperialists and Soviet domination a monster? no thumbs up for ye lad.

Soviet "imperialists" OOOOOOOOOOKAY.