Patients who say they're afraid to die 

As a mother and now grandmother, I would give anything to be able to hug you right now. I am so sorry about your Eli. What an amazing opportunity he gave you by saying that to you. And the perfect response by you should bring you great comfort! Children are so innocent and pure, they are surely a piece of heaven on earth. I believe with all my heart and soul you'll be with Eli someday and he and the doggies will be there to greet you. May your heart and soul be comforted until that day comes.

I am so very sorry that your little boy passed away at such a young age. I do very much hope that your beautiful dachshunds greeted him with happy kisses and so much love, and I hope they all greet you the same way when it is your time. God bless.

Yes ❤

Sad I wonder if he had a feeling about dying?

💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

Beautuful!

I certainly appreciate you sharing your experiences and knowledge on this topic. I've shared this platform with several people I know who are experiencing the dying process even if the patient wasn't hospice!

That's pretty much exactly how the Bible describes Death, as a SLEEP*UNCONSCIOUSNESS. It even tells us that the "Dead know NOTHING, yet the Living know they will die....".

​@@bethteer1509I've studied the Bible for over 50 years. There is no verse that says they stay asleep. They might need to rest after spending time in this realm, but it makes no sense that they would be in an unconscious state. Listen to some of the Christian NEDs, near,-death experiences.

You know what it’s like being dead ? What it was like before you were born. We have already been dead before

You're the best!

💗💗💗💗

Yes that was the last thing I said before my best friend and father in law went into a drug induced coma and he had the biggest smile ....yes just say how much u love them

Just listening is such a wonderful response and letting them know how loved they are and we will be with them for as long as they need or want

So...offer no comfort or hope? Sounds cold to me for someone who's scared and dying. What about offering to talk to a priest, or asking them about their own faith? Sounds cold to me. All due respect.

My mom died from cancer a year ago and we had periodic conversations about how she was feeling about what was going on with her. It was a four year battle in and out of hospital with multiple surgeries. About two months before she died she said she was done and wasn’t afraid and she would miss me. I appreciate the relationship we had even more now. I miss you too mom

My mother died just after her 90th birthday. I don't think she had any fear of death but she did say that "I'll miss being with you".

My mom was 60 years old when she died of cancer; I remember visiting her in the ICU after a heart attack, all bloated from drugs and treatment. She said she wasn't afraid to die as she knew she would never be the woman she was all energetic and athletic, drinking and laughing with her friends. She wanted me to know she was ready to go and for me to know she was okay.

@@99Michael Thanks everyone for sharing your stories too. Even though people die, this shows they can die a good, peaceful death that is so atraumatic….and that we can enjoy our memories knowing that our loved ones can pass with no fear. The sadness is ours to bear. It’s been 13+ years since my mother passed and I’m glad to say I’ve only had 2-3 dreams where I was aware in the dream that she was even sick. I hope you all have mostly good memories and dreams of your loved ones. 🙏🏻💞🕊

That is almost the same thing my mother said. We were both blessed.

My father in law was ill in the hospital. He had multiple health issues that were becoming untreatable. We visited him on a Sunday, and it was decided he was to come home and go into hospice. We all told him we loved him and would see him the next day, and take him home. He died that night at 3am. Thank you for sharing, I'm glad you had that time with your dad.

@@PanamaRose thanks for sharing your story. It's almost the same as my dad's. The last day I visited him was a Monday and he was supposed to move to a hospice care but he passed away in the ICU at 2am the following day

​@@ricavegak😅

😅😅

My mum died in august 2022 she was 77 she was afraid of dying but she had the perfect death all her family at her hospital bed she went nice and peaceful. I miss her terribly

I made sure my therapist knew about her. She is so straightforward, not extreme, not at all dark or pretend. A valuable resource. Safe to recommend.

Beautiful. Thanks!

If you are a believer in Jesus Christ how true this statement is!

Yes

@@Pdk764 So true! And something I look forward to!

Yes. I love Jesus Christ and am looking forward to my death from earth and new life with Him. 💙

Nobody better say this to me when I'm dying!

Condolences on the loss of your uncle, God bless.

❤

Well I hope you didnt cause more anguish with this advice. I would be devastated if I was not told anything. For Gods sake, you try to comfort someone whom has asked you something. Even if you dont have the answer. I guess Im just one person that no answer or an I dont know is so triggering to me.

@@madelynhernandez7453 ‘Scuse me?

I was "dead" for 18 minutes during a cardiac arrest. The final moments just before I went lights out was absolutely the most peaceful feeling i've ever experienced!

That's good to hear.

@@geckster109 what all did you experience? I'm so curious

For me, it's not dying that scares me, it's how I did. I'm afraid of pain, or not being able to breath. Drowning is one of my fears, because you can't breath.

I have mostly heard drowning is peaceful. You just have to get past that first breathe. It does seem terrifying though.

As long as I rejoin Francine Mewsette, (my cat who was my 4th daughter!) Francy, I miss you so much! 🐱❤

I like your sister. I have often thought how glorious it would be to laugh (and mean it) just before leaving this world. My deepest sympathy for your loss.

As an ER/trauma RN I have a true love and so much respect for hospice nurses. I can deal with blood and horrible injuries, etc., but I could never do hospice nursing. They truly are a special breed.

@@juliemiller3502 They really are. I'm a former firefighter & EMT so I definitely get what you are saying.

That is beautiful. Thanks for sharing that.❤

My brother Keith would always say something very similar. He would say they know now they know... Now he knows 😢 💜

@318greenman I'm so sorry for the loss of your brother "Keith" God bless him 🙏❤️🙏 Now he knows and I hope it's wonderful and full of beauty and everything he loves ❤️

Thanks I really appreciate u taking the time to respond... He was an extremely unique person/musician with his own take on The world and an extremely sensitive soul 💜

@@318greenman it is a nice and comforting thought, but if there is nothing after this, no soul, no afterlife, etc., then they dying person will just lose consciousness and never really know one way or the other because they won't be able to think ever again.

Yupp- took my mom a week to die, Mostly slept. But woke up for a few minutes, my last time where she was conscious...."Mom, Mom,...." she said.. I took the Picture of her mother down from wall, who passed when my mom was 12, brought up to her bed so she could see it clearly .... got the biggest SMILE, than that was it. My last moment with her... Death is just a door...

This gave me chills and hope. Thanks for sharing. ❤

Amen. Continue to let people know how important it is to receive Jesus before their time is up. Be blessed

That's powerful brother... thanks for sharing 🙏

I have an absolutely terrifying fear of death right now. It keeps me up at night and I don’t want to feel like this and live in fear. I really hope I have a long time left in this life, but I know how quickly that can change. Scares me so much

Ask The Holy Spirit to calm your fear.

Hospice is great! They were at my home when my husband died. I advise everyone to get hospice in.

@marilyncalvert4143 great advice. Can't say enough good things about Hospice.

The hospice nurses and counselors who helped my mom were amazing as well. We took care of her at home but I'm not sure we could've done nearly as well without their help. Mom asked that two of them be allowed to speak at her service. They checked up on me for 6 months or so after she passed. Hospice workers are heaven sent.

Hugs ❤️

Beautifully expressed. 😌♥️

Just want to remind you about the most most important decision we need to make before we die, and that is to accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior. My father just passed, and wasnt able to pass this on to him in time. I just wanted to let you know a little about what the bible says. For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. So no one is good enough to get to heaven due to the law of the 10 commandments. Bible also says, its not by works should any one boast. So being a good person does not get you to heaven either. The only way to heaven is by repenting of your sins, and putting your faith in Jesus. Bible says, Whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. So you see, there is a need for salvation to get to heaven, that is why Jesus died on the cross. He took all of our sins upon him, so that if we call upon him, and accept Him into our Heart, we can have eternal life. We must be Born Again to enter the kingdom of God. You do not get there being a good person, or doing good deeds. Jesus also says, that I am the way, the Truth, and the Life, no one comes unto the father, except through me. So please make that decision, so that you can have peace and comfort when your time is up. Its the most important decision of your life. you can then have that eternal peace and assurance before you die. All you have to do is humble your heart and say, Jesus, i believe you died and rose again, I repent of my sins, I ask you to come into my life, be my Lord and savior, I give you control. From this day forward, I want to live for you. At that moment, The Lord will send His Holy Spirit to come live on the inside of you. The Holy Spirit is the seal of God, and your evidence you have been born again. He will transform your heart and mind. You will become a new creature in Christ. Old things will pass away, all things will become new. Its truly Amazing! Its the most important decision of anyone's life. Jesus is the only way to heaven. Please believe me, and research for yourself. Once its over, there is no turning back. Jesus cares for you, and does not wish for you to be separated from him. So many people think that being a good person gets you there, and its simply not true, so please don't ignore. Today is the day of salvation. He loves you, and does wish for anyone to be apart from Him, but to have eternal life in heaven. Be blessed. Im praying for you. Please ask Jesus to come into your heart my friend, He loves you!

I am thinking about you. ❤

I hear” you ❤️ It would be nice to just laugh , even at the “bad” stuff. Life is not over. You’re here, and I hope you smiled and laughed today ❤️ Thank you for reminding me the importance of just “ being” .

Thank you for caring for your mom- it's one of the greatest acts of love

Julie...I felt like we had both gone full circle! I wouldn't have done it any different! ❤️

Just want to remind you about the most most important decision we need to make before we die, and that is to accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior. My father just passed, and wasnt able to pass this on to him in time. I just wanted to let you know a little about what the bible says. For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. So no one is good enough to get to heaven due to the law of the 10 commandments. Bible also says, its not by works should any one boast. So being a good person does not get you to heaven either. The only way to heaven is by repenting of your sins, and putting your faith in Jesus. Bible says, Whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. So you see, there is a need for salvation to get to heaven, that is why Jesus died on the cross. He took all of our sins upon him, so that if we call upon him, and accept Him into our Heart, we can have eternal life. We must be Born Again to enter the kingdom of God. You do not get there being a good person, or doing good deeds. Jesus also says, that I am the way, the Truth, and the Life, no one comes unto the father, except through me. So please make that decision, so that you can have peace and comfort when your time is up. Its the most important decision of your life. you can then have that eternal peace and assurance before you die. All you you need to do is simply, humble your heart and pray with faith, I repent of my sins, and I turn to You. You said in Your word that if we confess with our mouth, and believe in our hearts that God raised Jesus from the dead, we shall be saved. I ask You Father to forgive me of all my sins, and ask You to fill me with the Holy Spirit, and take control of my life. Its the most important decision of anyone's life. Jesus is the only way to heaven. Please believe me, and research for yourself. Once its over, there is no turning back. Jesus cares for you, and does not wish for you to be separated from him. So many people think that being a good person gets you there, and its simply not true, so please don't ignore. Today is the day of salvation. He loves you, and does wish for anyone to be apart from Him, but to have eternal life in heaven. Be blessed. Im praying for you. Please ask Jesus to come into your heart my friend.

@@Outsider4JC thank you for this and yes please continue to spread the message! My mother and I got our affairs with God taken care of and there's no doubt she is sporting some of the most beautiful wings. For me...I have horrible anxiety and worse with approaching older age and hormone issues. I have no doubt that when my time comes, I will be happy to go!

@@Outsider4JC 🙏🏽 AMEN to that!

Beautifully expressed. Thank you for sharing this very personal experience. 😌♥️

Oh wow!!! Thank you for saying this- seriously means ssooooo much coming from another hospice nurse

Never heard of this before but what a lovely idea ❤

They are incredibly brave and selfless to the final breath. Healing to visitors of this living wake.

The part that worries me the most is leaving my kids behind. I just hit 40 and my kids are still young and it’s starting to worry me. I’m not afraid to die because I know what happens next but I can’t leave these little boogers. I pray everyday for the lord to keep me here as long as possible.

Wise words I believe. @jojo1234a I dont believe I'd get any comfort from a person saying that I could let go now and that it was time to go. I had a similar experience being with a friend who was dying, and well meaning nuns speaking similar words to her. She may have hung on for a further 2 months to spite them the dear woman.

I didn’t know your Grandmother but i was very close to mine too. I hope anyone who would have those words in their mind, would see your comment. “It’s time to go” should never be told to someone actively dying. I got a sick feeling in my stomach reading that you said that. I hope that her nonverbal reprimand made her feel better. I would take your words to mean, Go ahead and pass, we've been here for days. I know you didn't mean that, but…gosh

@@scharf74 yes! Exactly that, precisely what you just said. I couldn’t have put it better myself. It was a real shame from my side, and as soon as I saw her eyes give me that loving yet stern and slightly confused glare, I apologised profusely to her and rectified my mistake, reminding her that we wanted to be with her and she wouldn’t be alone for all the loving family we had around. And we continued chatting to her about what a wonderful mother, grandmother, great and great great grandmother she has always been. We chatted to her and amongst ourselves around her, including her in the conversation, chuckling about wonderful funny memories, just keeping the atmosphere cool, calm and collected for her. I mean, seriously, who the heck am I to tell my own grandmother, who was many years my senior and therefore many years wiser, the same amazing woman who has taught me so many things in both emotional stability and general life skills such as cooking, knitting, mending clothes etc etc …. Who am I to tell HER that ‘I’ have decided she may now go. Gosh, the shame I feel in hindsight. I have grown, learned, and moved on from it, but I do find it ironically beautiful that she taught me that one last lesson. After I righted my wrongs to her, I sang her favourite songs to her (she always loved my singing voice), her whole body relaxed and she gently found the strength to lift an arm and stroke/play with my plaited hair, I had a plait to the side of my hair that day as it was easy and fast to do in order to hotfoot it to the hospital. I don’t know if she knew it was me, or was thinking back to her own long black plaited hair from when she was younger, but regardless, she was indeed at ease. I had been singing songs to her for a while, then had a chat/giggle with her (she was not replying of course, but that doesn’t mean we can’t involve them still) about how she is my biggest fan, and she is very patient for putting up with my awful singing voice, I said this with a chuckle. I said to her “I’ll get someone else to pop in and sit with you while I go to the toilet, goodness knows you deserve a break from putting up with me singing away to you”. And she used the very last of her energy to reach both arms up, hug me gently and say “more please”. Those were her last words and the last time she moved. I of course significantly delayed my trip to the toilet and carried on singing, stroking her beautiful soft skin and delicate beautiful hair. I sang all sorts to her. This is what relaxed her enough to enter that coma state from which she never did wake up from. I cringe at those words I had said to her, it was my first experience of death (at the time) outside of my nursing career, and I naively thought I knew how it would all go, I was very wrong, being with a loved one is incredibly different. My level of care and compassion for patients who were passing has and always will be given my very best, it’s the least they deserve, but I was humbled that day. One last lesson from our family matriarch, and one last set of beautiful moments and memories thereafter. I wanted to post my comment initially to point out to others that, while I cannot judge what their loved ones may or may not wish to hear, just think before you speak and learn from my huge oopsie. Bless her, though I have lost many more close to me since, I do miss her, though she had a long life and was very ready to go and reunite with her husband on the other side, this she had verbalised to me for some years prior to passing, even prior to early onset of dementia.

@@naefa precisely! In the emotions and the immense feelings of it all, it’s so important to speak easy to our loved ones and never talk “about” them as if they aren’t in the room. But, in the very same sense, just think of what words you are saying. I agree that I would probably not get comfort from those words either, to the best of my knowledge, and I dare say I might then hang on just to remind others who is in charge here. Thanks for noticing my comment, I am ashamed of it, but I say it in the hope that others might just be a little more careful before uttering such pretentious words to their actively dying loved ones. When my father passed in my arms in 2022, my words were very different, I had grown and learnt and I hope to always grow and learn. He passed, albeit far before his time, in his bed in the arms of me and my mother who was his wife of many many years, and the peace he felt at the very very end was clear to see. Preceding that though, it was pretty horrific, I have ptsd from it. However, at the end, he found and saw something so beautiful that I cannot even begin to describe his face to you. I’m afraid of the pain and I’m afraid to leave my own children behind, but I’m not afraid to die anymore. Whatever is on the other side of that unknown void is stunningly beautiful and peaceful, I saw his face, I know it to be his truth and also my truth. Sending love and blessings to all who are missing loved ones or are in the process of loosing loved ones. The universe takes as much as it gives, our time here is precious, but they do go on and so do we, this I know as my truth and I say it with pure sincerity from the varied experiences I have been blessed to attend. Sending my love to all.

@@jojo1234a hi there, I was quite moved by reading your reply. You speak with wisdom and express yourself beautifully.

What is morphine

Love to you. That must have been so hard to get through. 💗

So sorry for your loss.

@@luanngordon8639 Thank You very much Luann!!! Blessings from my family in Arizona 👋❤❤❤

@@maddybertani8161 Thank You very much Maddy!!! Thank you all so much for your kind words! Yes it was hard Maddy, but I made it through it! Thank you!!!😍

The purpose of love is to make permanent impermanent things. I am so sorry for your unimaginable loss.

It frightens me that you are not sure of your eternal salvation. One great thing about Jesus Christ is He's not looking for a religion but a relationship with all who will call upon His name, repent (turn away from sin), seek Him and ask Him to be your Lord and Saviour. We will all serve a master and we will all live in eternity. The decision we have to make is who will we serve? Those who ride the fence, chose Satan outright, and those who die before choosing will spend eternity in Hell separated from God. Those who sincerely choose Jesus Christ will spend eternity in heaven with God. I pray you get off the fence, seek Jesus Christ while He can still be found and surrender yourself to Him. You will not regret that choice. Praying for you to make the right choice soon because none of us are promised tomorrow. 🙌🙌🙌❤❤❤

@@THEJ0KER8888 shut up

@@dog-eared6991 Hit a nerve? Just maybe the Holy Spirit trying to get your attention. God bless!

Hi Murphy I can give you proof for God if you’re interested

It is really selfish to say, look at all these good people do you think all go to hell just because they don't believe in a certain religion, c'mon that thought is so immature you can have a way better god a moral one not a tyrant. A loving god is not supposed to abuse the power.​@@THEJ0KER8888

Did this experience change you?

Respectfully, you didn’t really die. The truly dead don’t come back.

Not necessarily Nikki Sixx of the band Motley Crue had a NDE in December, 1987 he was pronounced dead for about 45 minutes after a heroin OD he didn't see any tunnel of light or angels nor demons but he witnessed his body on a stretcher being placed in an ambulance and being surrounded by fans weeping over his death and then he was revived at the hospital and he was dead for a short period of time.

@@DaveBoswell-lz3kc To be dead is to cease producing electrical activity in the brain. When this occurs, one is truly dead, and there is zero chance of returning to life. People are occasionally pronounced dead because breathing and heart function ceases. This is not death.

That is so thoughtful. One of those small things that bring comfort.

Thanks you mama Vicky- I'm so sorry you're having a rough day- thank you for being here. I hope it goes well talking to your doctor

How come your dying ?

@@Cognitoman heart failure

@@THEMamaVicky sorry to hear that. Can you get a transplant ?

this life is short and practically NOTHING compared to where we are going. study NDE's and listen to testimonies of the glory that is ahead please, do not be scared.

As a Christian you either go to heaven with Jesus or hell. Every individual goes to one of those places. Every body has a spirit and it goes somewhere.

But what if you are wrong?

I think your Dad was very wise in what he said. It is the “great unknown” whichever way you cut it. Yes, unknown. 😌♥️

I've thought a lot about this very thing. And honestly it gets me more. That I'm going to be dead and not know.

I don't want to cease to exist..but it's the dying that's terrifying...once your dead you will never be aware of it...your father was wise in his analogy

"I was dead for millions of years before I was born, and I never felt the slightest inconvenience from it.'" - Mark Twain

You did good ❤️ what a lovely son you are. My condolences .

❤❤❤❤

I'm sorry..that must be so hard.😢

Prayers for your mum. I just went through this in May 2023 My deepest sympathy to you and your family.

I’m there with my mom too. It’s so sad. Prayers for everyone ❤

My mom dying was the absolute worst thing that has ever happened. I wish you the very best

I lost my Mom 6 years ago. And my heart goes out to each of you. She was brave. I was and am terrified. I just hope I have my family there with me. I'm glad you are there with her now. And I pray you feel comfort and peace in the end.

I would consider it an honor to be asked, good friends are rare.

@@mattdonna9677 It was a great honor. Friends like him are very rare, at least for me.

Thank you for sharing this. So beautifully put…the duality.

The thing about grief is that it is love that no longer has a place to go. Hugs from this stranger, if you care to accept them.

I’d say “we don’t know” because presumably both are alive and everyone can die at any moment. 🙏

Thank you for your insight Jane Smith ❤️

Just want to remind you about the most most important decision we need to make before we die, and that is to accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior. My father just passed, and wasnt able to pass this on to him in time. I just wanted to let you know a little about what the bible says. For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. So no one is good enough to get to heaven due to the law of the 10 commandments. Bible also says, its not by works should any one boast. So being a good person does not get you to heaven either. The only way to heaven is by repenting of your sins, and putting your faith in Jesus. Bible says, Whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. So you see, there is a need for salvation to get to heaven, that is why Jesus died on the cross. He took all of our sins upon him, so that if we call upon him, and accept Him into our Heart, we can have eternal life. We must be Born Again to enter the kingdom of God. You do not get there being a good person, or doing good deeds. Jesus also says, that I am the way, the Truth, and the Life, no one comes unto the father, except through me. So please make that decision, so that you can have peace and comfort when your time is up. Its the most important decision of your life. you can then have that eternal peace and assurance before you die. All you have to do is humble your heart and say, Jesus, i believe you died and rose again, I repent of my sins, I ask you to come into my life, be my Lord and savior, I give you control. From this day forward, I want to live for you. Its the most important decision of anyone's life. Jesus is the only way to heaven. Please believe me, and research for yourself. Once its over, there is no turning back. Jesus cares for you, and does not wish for you to be separated from him. So many people think that being a good person gets you there, and its simply not true, so please don't ignore. Today is the day of salvation. He loves you, and does wish for anyone to be apart from Him, but to have eternal life in heaven. Be blessed. Im praying for you. Please ask Jesus to come into your heart my friend.

The best thing we can do is offer this to the living. The ONLY lasting hope anyone has is this; John 3:16-18 "Most assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me has everlasting life."-Jesus(God)

I read about that in the book, the grace and dying by Katherine Singh. That the ones who have the easiest time dying are the ones who are religious or spiritual. They tend to have very peaceful deaths.

Bless your heart. I hope that the pain of loss gives way to pleasant memories of better times very soon.

Agree

Hello good morning Deborah how are you doing I’m Fred from Minnesota 😇🙏🏼

We can pray 🙏 for God to give us the faith we need. Remember John 3: 16, there are many promises in the scriptures, Revelation 21:1-4 My only son died unexpectedly on August 10 2022. I knew he was saved, and I'd see him again. Knowing this has carried me through this,the worst thing I've ever been through.

When you accept Jesus into your life as your Lord and Savior, believe who He is and on His death and resurrection, His Spirit comes to "live within you". John 3:16 as person mentioned...Emmanuel..means God with us. He helps you to understand and to KNOW by His Holy Spirit. He gives you a peace that you have never felt before. It's amazing. I hope you seek Him out and know that you will be saved.

During Covid's lockdown period, I did a deep dive into religious history. As a result, I've come to the idea that the very worst outcome for me will be simply that I'll fall into unconsciousness and never regain it. I believe that anything else will be a wonder to behold, and I'm not at all afraid anymore.

While I was on hospice myself. The Lady chaplain could not help my fears of death. She gave up. Unless one has faith in God and is assured of their eternity. No one can make them no afraid of death. I just don't know what truth is .I believe in God. Just not sure about religion

@@suebell7281 , I once was a believer. Even as a child I feared death. Always have. Now, I have studied many beliefs and am more of a Jew in my beliefs. I am now in my last days/ months and no one can say anything that helps I believe in God. The one true G-d. I think being brought up in a Christian home. The fear of hell stays with me. So I stopped hospice as they wanted to give morphine which would not have worked since I am on blood thinners. I don't want to die any sooner than God wills.

It sounds u hold this very strong to ur heart,maybe because you're not satisfied in how things went,but it sounds to be also ur holding resentment towards your mom & brother,I may not know much maybe but I do know that it's family who we resent the most because we have this expectations & sometimes our tired body will give up on us and then u will never have that moment again,just think for a moment if they wish they done things differently or how bad it affects them as well to know this & instead be a strong support don't let bitterness get the best out of you be able to put that to rest and I do hope for ur peace of mind so u can live a good life wish u a good 2024 from a friend from California really close to san Francisco'

@@Marthalilia-gs5wh - Thank you for caring so much to give such good advice! I can’t tell you how much I truly appreciate it. Things have indeed been difficult and I fear they’ll never be the same between me, my mom and brother, but your advice is spot on and brings me great comfort x 💛

I’m so sorry for the loss of your father and also for the way your mom behaved towards him while he was in hospice. I lost my mom in 2021. I took care of mom for a long time before she went to a home. She was with my husband and I for over 7 hrs and her level of care exceeded what I could do for her at home. She needed a feeding tube etc. But, I was there at that home all the time to help with her care. She was 84 when she died. I felt compelled to reply to your comment because I can relate to how you feel about how your father died. To make a long story short, my goal was to be with my mom when she died. It was the last thing I could do for her, to be there with her when she took her last breath so she wouldn’t be alone. But, it did not work out that way. The hospice nurse said it would be approximately 48hrs. I needed hip replacement and I was in so much pain from sitting in the chair next to her for so many hrs I just wanted to lay down for a bit to get it to calm down so I could get back there. We got a call just a few hours later. My mom had passed, without me there. My husband and I spent 3 hrs there with her and stayed till the funeral home took her. I cried and cried. My mom’s eyes we open also and mouth wide open. If you look back at Julie’s videos You’ll learn that the eyes being open including the mouth is very natural. All of the muscles relax, so this is why that happens. I suffered for months about not being there with her, even knowing what I know. And what I know is, you can be with them vigilantly and as soon as you get up once to go to the bathroom they pass. A lot of times because they don’t want you to see them go. And, please listen to me when I tell you, he was not alone. Our bodies die but the spirit does not. I’m quite sure loved ones gone before him were there to guide him. My wish for you is to find peace about this. I know how you feel, but your father knows your heart and he would not want you to worry about this. I’m sure your brother did not mean to fall asleep and your father I’m sure passed peacefully. I hope this somehow helped you. i agree with you about Julie! I would want her as my hospice nurse too! Mom died much much sooner then they expected when they evaluated her, 48 hrs turned into only 6 hrs and she was gone. They are very good at what they do and are usually very accurate but, sometimes not, they don’t have every bit of control over that. Please know your dad would not want you to feel bad about this, believe me he would not want this for you. Just know that he is happy and not sick anymore. You will see him again sweetheart, he will be there when your time comes. That’s what I think about, I’ve even had little signs from her. I also talk to her every day and I know she hears me. Hugs to you. ❤🥰❤🥰❤🙏🏻🙏🏻

Thank you so much! I’m in tears over your compassion and your level of understanding. I’m so sorry about your mom! I’ve heard many stories of devoted loving people who can spend 23 hours a day with their loved one, and when they leave for a bite to eat, they aren’t there when their loved one passes away. The most comforting thing you wrote was how when it’s my turn to go, i’ll be reunited with my Dad’s soul. I personally truly believe that. I too talk to my Dad everyday and it’s been over 7 years. Also, you wrote that even though he died alone without a physical body right next to him, there is no doubt he had knew we were all in our home together and the loving souls that passed before him, and the unimaginable, unconditional love of God were all there with him too. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. The pain of it all seems lighter. I’m glad I wrote a comment and received caring, kind and understanding words of support from people like you and the previous person. I’ll keep both of you in my prayers.

Life isn't fair

Amen, I hope you are right. Most good people have suffered enough on Earth.