Promising Young Woman, Explained - Look In the Mirror 

Please could you put spanish subtitles. I want to share this analysis with my aunt and mom and every person that I know, but unfortunately they don't speak english 🙏

MTV’s Sweet/Vicious was a lot like this but on a campus setting, 1 season, came and went... Great series, no fanfare.

Moral of the story stay away from drunk girl. Run for your life, run for your life.

Question The Take How would you do a video on 90s film with Demi Moore and Michael Douglas, DISCLOSURE??????????

I didn't like the movie before because of its writing but now I like it way less, a lot of things in it had to only happen due to certain circumstances and the way she comes back years later means that she never cared about doing the moral thing and just out for revenge in this weird fantasy she has. By the way she had a knife and he was restrained and alone. That's self defense. Plus it's weird that he didn't call the cops considering the circumstances.

Very nicely put!

@Akshay 18 regardless of whether or not alcohol makes their libido high or not, it should never be used as an excuse.

Ok but if the guy is also drunk, is he also being molested by the woman? (not talking about actual rape cases, just sex that women later regret)

@@juliaflohr if they’re both just as drunk then no, but if he’s drunk and she’s not, then yes, it’s rape. Same goes for if he’s a lot drunker than her(he can’t walk straight, but she’s just tipsy, for example)

@Akshay 18 women do harass and assault men, it’s just not as common and men are less likely to report it.

Yeah, and maybe if men saw that there are real consequences for their actions, they would think twice about doing terrible acts

@@SamDNVS These are the facts. I think like only 7 percent of rape cases result in a conviction.

@Naim Miah If they think they can get away with it it's because there are not enough consequences for those that are prosecuted, either not enough punishment or getting away with it entirely

@Naim Miah I literally got laughed at by a cop when I went to report the assault, most times nothing comes from trying to get justice except for more trauma

@@EmyN not only that but frankly boys at an early age should be taught wrong and right. many go unpunished for things like bullying girls bc its seen as normal but grow into men who assault women (not always people can outgrow bad behavior)

"A male gaze" that's how they call it, and it's jarring.

Mary Ianna well put

for real, it's hard for me to watch movies and stories about these topics because more often than not, it's made by men exploiting the victims.

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being smarter didnt help her he overpowered her! yet she sent the evidence to the lawyer beforehand landing Al in jail but she was burned!

Don't u just love how men will switch up that narrative for their own convenience 💯

Your sexism is showing woman

@@baronzemo457 How is that sexist?

THIS ⬆

Innocence is the heart of childhood. Rape and sexual assault destroy what makes childhood so precious and memorable (good memories, carefree, etc.)

Yeah, it's a stupid argument because it doesn't even apply. Ignorance/immaturity will never excuse cruelty. Cruelty is a choice.

They weren’t even kids which makes it even more frustrating. They were in med school, so they would be in their 20s.

Innocence is the heart of childhood. When rape and sexual assault destroy this principle that shields them from the harsher aspects of the world, then what makes childhood precious disappears and can't be reclaimed. As a general rule, youth is not not not an excuse for sexual misbehavior and assault.

@@amywilson9591 Omg I forgot that part! Wow that makes it even more insane that they all thought that would absolve them of what they did

Agreed, you get stronger only when you go through the long journey of building yourself up.

yup people even weaponize that and be like “well at least u can learn something out of it and become stronger” LIKEEEE NOPE??? no one should “learn” from that and it’s just trauma that is learned not strength 😐

YES, im sick of the dismissive stupid trope that women need to be abused to be stronger. Surviving abuse doesn't make you strong, you were strong to begin with. All the abuse did was claw away at you and hurt you. Some shows like GoT make it seems like the women should be grateful for the abuse

@@botanicalitus4194 THIS! 👏

This movie was just a bunch of rape culture cliches. Nothing subtle about the messaging at all and it was super preachy. It goes beyond fiction and just becomes a public service announcement.

What I think is a bigger gut punch is the fact that Al could easily make a self defense case. After all that, after putting her entire life on hold (school, relationships, her career) Cassie may not even get her revenge.

@@cynthiaanderson6410 Eh, even if he does, I doubt judges will believe him. Here's where the stigma works in her advantage, where ppl won't soon believe a guy was physically overpowered by a woman. Plus, he still committed a crime by burning her body instead of calling the police. Also, there's the lawyer, who's so deeply haunted by his passed, I'm guessing he'll jump at the chance to be able to sleep better at night. We rarely get such an opportunity to make things right. And that lawyer, who's probably pretty blood-thirsty too, has a video of Al raping this young woman, with the other guys watching. Even just making this video public will make those guys'lives a lot harder...

@@Jazzisa311 that’s true. Although, somehow I think Cassie would have asked not to release the video. Or at least only release it to the cops/court. It would be disrespectful to Nina’s memory if a video of her rape was made public to the whole world.

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@@Jazzisa311 well, thank you Roxy. Your perspective gives me a little more peace, because I was also thinking he could claim self-defense, even though he clearly killed her, but he also got rid of the evidence and her body. But who knows, anything is possible if you can make the jury sympathize with the promising young man.

There was another study some time ago, I’m sorry I don’t have the reference. But it found that a third of the male student participants reported that they would commit SA if they knew they would not get caught. I find that to be a rather alarming figure.

@@sugabud disgusted but not surprised.

@@sugabud what is SA?

@@NamesZKP it’s probably an abbreviation for sexual assault.

@@cynthiaanderson6410 makes sense

Thats real life. In the simplest form , when people cheat. You're not sorry about what you did, you're sorry for getting caught and losing what you wanted to keep

@@moxiemaxie3543 That doesn’t make it less disgusting. They played a part in Nina’s death, they caused a lost of a life. Cheating on someone is also a horrible act. You are actively breaking the trust of your partner and knowingly hurting them. They are willing to risk their relationship, they pay for it. I feel no sympathy for them.

That's sadly realistic. Most of the guys in this movie are out to save their own skins, with Al's best friend covering up Cassie's murder. Even Madison and Dean Walker are content to brush the entire incident under the rug, and claim that Nina was to blame. It's not until Cassie tricks them into thinking that Madison and Walker's daughter were assaulted that they begin taking sexual assault seriously. Even Jordan, the lawyer, regrets not taking action when he could have.

I've been that guy. 100%. And if the women that I hurt in the past through being coercive didn't hold me accountable, I wouldn't have done the work to own my trauma and toxic behaviors that damaged me through this terrible Society. (Boys will be boys, boys don't cry, competition over vulnerability/authenticity) I will always own my past and speak to other men honestly about it. I'm dedicated to atone by showing up to help other men be better.

@@fiyahspinnah Just so you know, I'm 100% against that crap. Or anything that justifies men to sexual assault women.

It doesn't take much for a woman to be called "evil".

most of them are taking the movie at complete face value, it's not trying to demonize all men at all

“Male audiences hate Cassie.” Sounds like generalizing to me. Bit hypocritical but you do you 👍🏼

its because this movie feels real. dexter doesnt feel real. loki doesnt feel real.

@@katrin6388 are you suggesting men can't tell the difference between fiction and reality if it's made to feel real?

Oh My god, and what happened to you and your friend? This leaves me speechless

I hope you two pressed charges. Even if you yourselves don't get justice, if everyone that guy rapes reports it, the harder it will be for cops to ignore future victims of this guy.

oh shit.... I hope he was found guilty ...

oh hell . . .

@@Sienisota I wish I could believe that. My 15 year old cousin was SA by her neighbor's son. Slipped something in her soda. She woke up on a bed with undies around her ankles. She reported it, it went to trial. Happened to 3 other girls all under 17. He was 19. His daddy had big pockets. Judge dismissed it and his dad bought him a comic book store in Minneapolis.

Even in the books, where the actual victim is Jeyne Poole and is r*ped daily by Ramsey (plus some b*stiality), after her escape she is clearly shown broken without repair. The violence she's subjected to is IMO gratuitous (sorry George, we already know what Ramsey is capable of and it adds nothing to the plot), HOWEVER, the author has the decency of not taking the "r*pe makes women stronger" route.

And it wasnt until Sansa started acting heartless and without emotions that people said she was strong and kept pushing the girl boss narrative. Basically insinuating that being emotional and empathetic is weak.

She wasn't glad. Sansa had a choice; stay mired in dreariness, or find something positive in what was an otherwise traumatic experience. In the world in which we live, it's somehow become a mark of higher wisdom to NOT get past the bad shit that happened to you

GoT writters a mysogenist.

Yep. Not a fan of that r@pe porn garbage

YES!! such a smart move honestly

Also at first Cassandra gives a fake number to Ryan but instead of getting the memo that she's not interested in him, he comes back another time! Shows you he's not actually a 'Nice Guy'.

Where I come from "My Mother" taught me a lot about respect for people... And I Respect 'Promising Young Woman'

PEZZZZ hurt the hardest to see as the killer.

Although Dan from gossip girl isn't as innocuous seeming anymore after "You"

Henry Cavill even winged about not being able to talk to women in fear of an accusation. Scrotes are everywhere and telling on themselves.

People afraid of false accusations imagine that accusations are weapons that you can use on another person, but in reality the accusers come into just as much pain and trouble as the accused (if not more).

Yesss and Carrie Mulligan needs to win an Oscar for it. If I were to not know who she was I would’ve believed her and not think it was part of a movie.

@@elainestokes2787 Scrotes?

Society gives so much sympathy towards men that it’s unrelenting. It’s always about the men’s lives that are ruined when they’ve been accused but never about the women’s lives they’ve ruined. What about all the women who’ve had to experience trauma? What about the women who never even reported their assault for fear of not being believed? This idea that we need to give the men the benefit of the doubt is patriarchal thinking.

him arrested at his wedding is a way more fitting punishment. we should get a sequel: maybe the cops catch Al's friend Joe, maybe Al breaks out of prison, maybe his bride never finds love again or goes insane after this

Im so sorry that this was the case for you. And yes, this movie brilliantly handled that.

I may not know your story, and I am definately not expecting you to share it with strangers, but if you haven't gotten justice, I hope you gotten some happiness at least. Life owes this both to you, and every other poor girl that had poured her aching heart around these here comments. Farewell and stay healthy.

I felt the same way and I’m also a survivor/victim. I think the film was excellent at showing how a rapist can sweep their acts under a rug and go on to marry some decent woman, after ruining the future of someone else. It’s been decades since I was raped and I’m still working on fixing the damage.

It's just a movie...

Omg I never noticed that it just makes the movie even better.🧐😱😱

yess love that line. also the hypocrisy of dean walker had me fuming

Cassie and Nina were definitely the truest love story here.

Likewise. Despite Nina not ever appearing on screen, we still get the sense of how important she was to Cassie, and how her assault and eventual suicide devastated Cassie. Platonic love is definitely underrated, and deserves just as much prominence in storytelling as romantic love. ❣️

Yesss, throughout the whole movie you get that, even though she loves Ryan at some point, her only true love, the one that she gave her life for, was Nina. And that's one of the most empowering messages of the movie. Other thing I realized (as a victim of assault myself) was the disappointed look in her eye when Ryan revealed his true self. She would never show it to him, but she did expect, in the deep, at least for a bit, that he was different.

@@quaseumhomemrenascentista6911 you're right. she knew she was better than to express herself then and there. but it probably killed her that Ryan was just like everybody else

Totally! I was so disappointed when the movie started to give the happily ever after vibe to their love story, and was glad that they flipped it and showed the reality of life. How there isn't always that soulmate that comes along at the perfect time and makes everything perfect.

same i was shocked by how good this movie was!

I had given my little brother a similar epiphany when he was in high school. He was talking about how two freshman kids got into a fight and one knocked the other out. The one that was conscious decided to teabag the unconscious legit like a video game character. My bro then went on to say that he would be so pissed if someone did that to him. And that is the worst thing that can happen when unconscious. I then just simply let out, that a lot worse things have happened to women when they are unconscious. He was stunned, but hey, I really think he needed to hear it bc he was going down a bad path.

@@thyironfist i swear to god all these 12 year old kids end up going down the alt right pipeline if you do not keep a check on them

I know right?

@Akshay 18 Le sigh. It's not ok to take advantage of a person who's drunk. it's not an excuse.

Finally, I thought people didn't notice that part. Her whole life being thrown aside and disregarded in a heartbeat to jump at a chance to convince a monster that the murder was just an accident.

What was she keeping the scorecard/checklist for ? Most of this movie was too ridiculous to take seriously.

Fantasy trauma is what you suffer from. You embarrassment

@@ccdogpark It was a list of all the men who tried to rape her when she pretended to be drunk. The list was a sign of her not getting over her trauma. And I guess it served as a reminder and motivated her to avenge Nina. And no, nothing about the film was unrealistic.

Though it doesn’t excuse his behavior by any means, I wonder if his easier dismissal was the fact that they are all medical students and they are accustomed with bodies and that’s why it’s easier to dismiss the individual life aspect of it?

Yeah i've been thinking about this too lately. Where is the line between romance and disturbing? And as you've said a lot of romcoms use the trope, and again its hard to draw the line.

i’ve noticed that the media has conditioned women to believe that borderline stalking and a man who can’t take no for an answer is the peak of romantic gestures (it has also taught boys that these behaviors are acceptable)... when girls are younger they watch their favorite disney princess unconscious while a stranger takes advantage of them by giving them a kiss without consent, but somehow it’s fine because the stranger is a handsome prince? the princesses are smiling when they wake up to a man they’ve only met once prior kissing them without permission, so it must be okay since they seemed to enjoy it? i remember watching a michael jackson music video with my dad (the one where he basically humps the ground) and he is pursuing a girl who obviously isn’t interest in him. he follows her around and would not leave her alone until she kissed him, implying that she was just “playing hard to get” instead of “giving in to a creep who won’t leave her alone” this behavior is also seen in one of the most romantic movies of all time... the notebook. a man literally stalks a girl who is already in a relationship and threatens to KILL HIMSELF until she says “yes” to go out with him. woman are constantly telling men that “no means no” while these problematic movies are teaching “no means convince me”... edward cullen breaks into bella’s house to watch her sleep and the audience swoons while we are filing restraining orders on guys who we smiled at ONE TIME. the media normalizes predatory behavior and then wonder why women aren’t taken seriously.

Have you seen Mr. Right with Sam Rockwell and Anna Kendrick? I won't give it away but the romantic male lead pushes in a way that seems positive because her boundaries about sex and intimacy are respected and she makes the decisions about where they'll go.

@@helihollow i still remember that scene un ratatuille were Lingüini Is made to kiss the girl without her consent, and she magicaly fell in love? What do they thech kids with this? Certainly not consent.

I remember while watching the movie that I was terrified with Cassie dating Bo Burnham's character. I wanted him to be a "real nice guy" but I knew it wouldn't fit the tone of the movie, and that it was only a matter of time before he did something terrible. It made me realize how much women's real everyday life is the actual horror movie.

This is SO well said!

I really feel u and just couldn't stop myself from hating men. Even if I try not to , they always find a way to prove me wrong.

I’m so sorry and I hope you and your friend are safe now! That’s disgusting they protected him!

@@hatiuno1295 It's society's fault for allowing misogynistic behavior to prevail. And I'm with you, I have met very few men who do not become predatory.

Me too, humanity sucks! Most people are rotten!

fr, she chose to dress girlishly in a way that felt childish at times. Very soft, bubbly, and pretty--which was in direct contrast to her personality. She tried so hard to cling to Nina's memory, without realizing she was actually clinging to her own guilt.

Great observation!

@@Patsanford220 thank you!

Well many people cannot afford new cars now because everything is expensive

​@@CreoTanI think it was also a strategy to not be recognized in daylight by the men she "catches" at the clubs.

This!!! I’m so glad someone else said it.

Well said

On the rape/revenge movie genre point- it's always grossed me out that scenes of sexual violence are, for some reason, filmed the *exact same* way as sex scenes.....and the exploitation genre isn't the only guilty party in media. So using the original "Last House on the Left" as an example, (being the first time I really noticed it) you get quick shots of female then male facial expression, shot of clothing coming off, back to shots of facial expression, then of the body movement, etc. Basically your average sex scene, except the woman is visibly upset and the man has a ridiculously menacing facial expression. I know it came out decades before I was born, but the basics of filming sexual violence hasn't seemed to change much since then.

Because this great film was done by a woman… men are visual creatures so I guess visual exploitation is what they prefer. I really enjoyed this movie. I like to use my imagination 💭

Where was I when they started the "female revenge genre" and why am I always the last person in the world to find out these things ? Maybe they should change the name of the LMN aka Lesbian Movie Network to the FRG network ?

The predator was drunk too. Drunk actions are sober thoughts, but we can't make thoughts illegal. Look I'd love to live in a world where those of us who are most vulnerable are not any more likely to become victims, but we don't live in that world. You are responsible for not being careful and putting yourself in that situation, I'm sorry, but that's how I feel. The justice system is set up to protect innocent people. Which means plenty of guilty people will go free. It's by design. The only thing you or I can do is make sure we aren't that appealing, and protect ourselves.

@@pronglet17 I’m confused as to what “predator” you’re referring to. One in the movie? I haven’t seen the movie, so I was just saying that victims *in general* should not be blamed for their assault if they are drunk, whether or not the perpetrator was drunk too. I understand that caution is always necessary, and of course I wouldn’t willingly let myself be in a vulnerable situation. However, I don’t think that assaulters should be punished less just because they’re drunk. Would they be punished less if they damaged property or caused a car accident while drunk vs while sober?

@Akshay 18 Are you saying it’s a good or bad thing that victims can’t get justice in the current court system that blames victims for their assault? Like, do you want the judge to excuse the criminal as if nothing happened? The people who make equality impossible right now are the ones who believe that certain identity groups (based off gender, race, class, etc.) deserve less rights. As long as you don’t think other groups are inferior to you, you’re not part of the problem, and we should push back against people who do have that mindset.

@@wendys9500 think they can get justice just hard. since the evidence is one person word against another. and the standard reasonable doubt. if someone memory hazy that doubt. so depends where you stand on the better for a 100 guilty people to go free the one innocent person to be in jail statement

@Akshay 18 What is really interesting is that entire speech you just wrote out is also monplogued, almost word for word, in this movie by two characters... that if a woman gets blackout drunk, then she has put herself in a vulnerable position and bad things will happen. Maybe you need to think of a better opinion.

In a version of the script Fennell did let Al say it, but it felt ingenuine. Because they still believe themselves to be the good guys, the couldn't see themselves in that bad light. They couldn't bring themselves to admit who they truly were, given the likely opportunity to get away with it.

That aligns with most real rapists. A study asked convicted rape criminals and even the vast majority of them lied they weren't rapists and that it wasn't rape/assault but consensual.

@@narushini704 Or the study of college guys asked if they ever r@ped someone. No they all said. But when a situation was described that was very obviously r@pe (holding someone down, threatening someone, not stopping when someone says no) but the actual word was omitted a terrifyingly large percentage said yes, they had held someone down, they had forced someone. But they weren't r@pists in their own eyes.

@@AnnekeOosterink So true. Unfortunately many studys show terrifying results. Like that many men would do it if they knew they weren't charged.

​@@mhawang8204I read that edition. I totally get why she took it out. It's really cool to have a movie that lives inside a social issue as tabboo as rape and work within it's rules, manifesting by never even verbalizing it. People don't use the word that much. And hey do that because they know how ugly it is. They don't want to look a it and they don't want to acknowledge it. But when I read the original, I thought it was perfect. I could imagine al hesitating before whispering it like a dirty secret.

well, it is true, just not in a good way and it is fucked up, that people ever think of it that way.

@@SingingSealRiana yes, I am where I am partially because of what happened. What those people don't realize is that I would have been so much further in life without the trauma. Idiots.

Reasons why I hate the whole "everything happens for a reason" and "if it doesn't kill you it makes you stronger" both are used as ways to invalidate ppl for being angry, still experiencing trauma and re-learning how to live with it. No one deserves to be raped/SA or any form of abuse. There is nothing that would be worth going through that and it does change you forever and no it isn't for the better.

@@SingingSealRiana Eh that's very dismissive and an over simplification and frankly this reminds me of toxic positivity. Maybe stop telling ppl to be thankful for their trauma. Also trauma changes you, it makes you stuck and keeps you in a regressed state each and every time you're triggered. No one ever really moves on. So please educate yourself before you say anything. The more you know 🌈

Raped women who became pregnant sometimes get said to be thankful because otherwise, they wouldn't have the child.

Men who fuck up are always “kids” and “boys” well into their thirties, but even a teenage girl or even a middle schooler is considered “grown” and “asking for it”.

Why is this even a justification at all though, does a child not no it's wrong to harm others??

@@cenedra20 right. This argument is used all the time. They are in college, which means they are old enough to vote, and if they’re mature enough to decide who’s leading our government then they should know damn well that rape is wrong.

Not to mention the "kids" that they were - were in their twenties. That's old enough to know right from wrong - and seven years (if I'm doing movie math right) is really no time at all - it's certainly not enough to have a life-changing epiphany if you're barely into your 30's

Also, they werent kids. Also, that's insulting to actual kids who arent rapists

Unfortunately, that was in the trailer.

To me, that proves that they actually know, deep down, that what they're doing isn't acceptable, but since the woman they're with is drunk, they can't be held accountable for their actions. He wasn't ashamed over trying to take advantage of a woman, he was ashamed because he was caught.

@@stephaniemasson1224 because they just can't help themselves when the target appears easily taken advantage of.

@@stephaniemasson1224 it was more fear than shame.

@@freddylubin fortunately, nobody asked you

It goes to show how much an impact media has on people's perception. When Alfred Molina got close to Cassie on the sofa and she was scared, I was scared with her and expected the worst. Expectation subverted indeed.

3 dC300 cede 33 ze 3rd Dr d ze r 3 d ze ze 3rd d3d34 ze, 333 Creech

I haven't seen this film yet, but this channel inspired me to check it out. Reading all the comments has been very informative and illuminating, as well.

I just watched the movie and thought exactly the same thing! The casting is truly great in that way :)

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Oh my god: "Also it’s like she knew that the only way for him to be arrested would be for murder, not rape, so she sacrificed herself for getting justice for Nina." That's SO right. It's....it's kind of sad how the only way for Al to get arrested would be for murder, showing once again how fucked the system is and how deeply Cassie knows it runs

Completely agree! Also just want to say I love your profile pic!

@@georgie4330 aww thanks!

She was supposedly killed by a man in handcuffs, genius. In the history of the world, has that ever actually happened, even once ? I could probably write a book about how stupid this movie is, if I had time.

The ending was the most ridiculous part of the entire movie. There was no logical reason to hide or burn the body. Cassandra showed up unannounced, drugged everyone there, and then took one person upstairs with the intention of killing him. I don't know how there could be a more clear cut case of self-defense. No one in their right mind would vote to convict the person who killed her. But there wouldn't be any jury because no prosecutor would waste their time trying to prosecute this case. In my next life, I am going to start a company that does nothing but evaluate movie scripts for logical consistency. Sometimes I wonder if anyone does that in Hollywood.

Ikr? I just kept thinking that eventually some guy would attack her back

Exactly. In my own experience, I'm 5 foot tall and 130 pounds. Even a small man could easily hold me down. And they have, but I'm not going to talk about it in this comment section.

literally, I'm a transguy and dude, the way chemicals and hormones change your body I've seen transwomen struggle to open jars (reduced grip strength is a common symptom of estrogen). Transmen accidentally break things bc we have significantly less time to develop a sensibility for the strength

@jermaine tobin that human biology is weird af

@jermaine tobin i mean yeah but i could have told u that it was from an unrelated chemical imbalance It's gotten me several charges dropped at least

Look, sexual assault is complicated, ive seen innocent dudes accused as well as victims not believed. No matter what happens somebody is gonna have their life ruined

@@MrEvldreamr you sound a lot like the people this movie is criticizing. Did you get to the part where they present stats about unreported assaults vs false accusations?

@@MrEvldreamr I hope you know that by you talking that this you’re denying a voice to all the victims out there. You’re being complicit with these crimes

@@sbcrshfw you did it! You found Satan himself, he with his powerful and poisonous words just denied all the innocent victims.

@@MrEvldreamr how do you know they were innocent?

Yes, and didn’t force himself on her-unlike Agamemnon

That’s so true! He ruined her life completely.

But Agamemnon took Cassandra a slave, a trophy for the victory. He ain't any better than Apollo in my eyes. Yes it was the norm back in the day. And so was Gods punishing mortals who hurt their feelings.

🤯🤯🤯

Also Nina means "girl" meaning that any girl or women could get raped.

When I reported mine I was told by a police officer "I hope you take this as a lessened to be learned" completely got victim blamed and also they decided there wasn't enough evidence so after I spoke to them, nothing happened. I just had to live with the assault and the bullying that came from it

I'm livid

I'm so sorry. I know it doesn't mean much coming from a yt comment but i believe your words and it's not your fault, you did nothing wrong. I hope your life will be full of happiness and that you won't ever have to face horrible acts like those described in your comments anymore

I never reported mine I was 10 and another when I was 16. I never told my parents, I was to scared. A family friend who sexually assaulted me.

@@erinnadia0409 And then people have the gall to say "oH, BuT fAlSe aCcuSaTiOnS :(" and "wOmEn cAn rUiN mEns' LiVeS sO eAsiLy :(" when women are the ones who actually get shunned and shamed by everyone when they report what happened to them.

Tasha: That was a beautiful and kind thing for you to say. Thank you for saying it. I'm willing to bet you just made a lot of people feel better.

Tasha, thank you for those strong words. I hope that “nice guy” takes responsibility for his actions.

Hey Tasha just so you know I’m reporting the comments from that sick excuse for a human who keeps replying on your post. That swine has no place spewing such ignorance when you have opened up so much. Thank you for your bravery and insight.

Same Tasha. I haven't had a drink in 25 years, but it turns out: "No means no, no matter what." It doesn't mean "Try harder", "Be nicer", or "Woo her into 'Yes'". That is called: COERCION/HARRASSMENT, and this film, (coupled with a "nice guy" date-rapist) helped me understand that, too.

@@heathernks8 I stopped drinking when I saw a girl (much like me in every sense except degree) get black out drunk and this guy and his friends took her somewhere undressed her and let her roam around drunk while everybody made fun of her and threw stuff at her. No one stood up for her and I was shoved to the ground trying to throw a shawl I had in my purse over her shoulders. I decided then and there to never drink, trust no one with your dignity and safety (not even friends.)

Except for that fairytale ending, which Cassie orchestrated like a friggin mastermind. Police interrupting the wedding attended by the main bad guys, perfectly synchronized with Cassie’s text messages and totally convinced who the murderers are. It was absurd and so tacky.

@@fat_old_sun I don't think it was THAT absurd. Cassie sent the evidence she needed to a powerful, wealthy lawyer, someone with the tools and means to make police look into an alleged crime. The fact that it all timed perfectly has less to do with her and more to do with how sloppy her killers were at covering up their crimes. Also, the police would TOTALLY arrest someone in the middle of their wedding just to throw them off and put pressure on them.

History is littered with women who just weren’t strong enough to overpower him, sadly.

She legit didn't have to die. She had evidence against them, and could've easily worked with police to make the perps confess. It ruined the movie.

@@elvirag4197 Under the Fifth Amendment, an individual cannot be tried twice for the same crime or Statute of Limitations for Rape?

@@amirahazhar4192 🥰❤️ I’m much better thank you so much

I’m in the Navy too and while your story isn’t mine, I know too many stories like yours and knowing their career is deemed more valuable than a person makes me angry. This system wasn’t designed to help. I’m so sorry that you had to experience all of that, but I’m happy to know that you’re in a better place.

What do you mean by toned down? U need to be raped so you can behave? I don’t understand, pls explain. Why would military let a man rape a woman to tone her down??

"abrasive and aggressive" in the fucking military. the logical leaps people would take in order to demonise someone as opposed to entertain the fact that a respected higher up is a bad person is surprising to me even now. I'm glad you are in a better place and I hope that we can see even more positive change in our lifetimes

A few years ago I was out with friends & one of my friends was wearing a dress without a bra or underwear on because you could see the lines through the thin dress & she wanted to look smooth and feel good while we went out dancing. She got drunk & a guy started dancing with her & after realizing she didn’t have underwear on, immediately began to take her to the bathroom with him. I don’t drink so I kept my eyes on her all night & I will never forget the way she looked around while he was walking away with her & she called, “Taylor??” looking for me. I walked over, grabbed her hand & told him this wasn’t happening & I saved her from being sexually assaulted. I don’t even know if she remembers it but I hope to God he does.

Taley unfortunately I don't even think he'd care

and educate and sensitize your fellow male human beings, sons, mates, etc. :)

Yeah 100%

Unfortunately not everyone is a good friend. A relative of my husband is a piece of shit . I got told this story , they had a girls night out and when one I'd the girls wss done instead of getting her a way home or going with her they let her go home alone , the thing is she got into the car and drove , at some point she felt like she was tired ,she got out and fell asleep in a field. Someone saw her called the police and she got send to the hospital. She got very lucky , however her so called friends (hence the relative) was calling her stupid and it was her fault . not once did they ask if she was okay , just bashed her . I'm glad th girl stopped hanging out with them. I don't speak to her either after I found out

@@smartass0124 my take is that you’re clearly just trying to stir shit up all over this comment section and I’m not going to bite. Find a hobby or something to occupy your time more appropriately.

I'm so glad you mentioned exploitive vs exploratory. I've been noticing that a lot lately. Frankly, the exploitive stuff feels a lot more noticeable, blatant and off-putting rather than compelling or interesting, nowadays.

@@kaitlynmartin2075 I completely agree. I think a lot of that comes down to having a female director. You’ll notice with a lot of films like The Last House On the Left and I Spit On Your Grave, those films are directed by men. The assault scenes are extremely exploitative and filmed with a very male gaze-like perspective, in my opinion.

I can relate to this so much. It's an especially gross idea to me because it trivializes abuse (because hey, if it made you stronger then it wasn't so bad huh?) and implies that if you pick yourself up and thrive you owe where you are today to your abuser for "making" you strong. Like no male writers, what happened to me didn't make me a girlboss. It didn't need to happen for me to become one and I'm not one because of it. What doesn't kill you doesn't make you stronger. In reality it just gives you trauma and impedes your ability to function and self-actualize.

i always find movies rape scenes so disgusting because they depict the rape too sexually and from the rapist's pov, rather than focusing on the horror that the victim is experiencing, it feels as if they're glamorizing/romanticizing women's traumas.

true but what about innocent ones who are accused? obviously the men who did it are despicable but often guys get away w/ everything. like creepy perverts, bullies, etc it's seen as normal

@@oooh19 that’s what trials and investigations are for. Most actual rapists unfortunately escape jail time. It’s very rare for those falsely accused of rape to be convicted

@@oooh19 well it shouldn't be normal, things are changing

@@Oreo-vh7rk "boys will be boys" even as grown men though. creepy old guys hitting on young women young enough to be their daughter or granddaughter is just gross no one calls them out on it they think oh they still got it

Lol his “soul” is already damned what’s a future gonna do for him. Yeet

They ignored the two women Cassie hold accountable, too. A lot of people in such discussions are very predictable and just try to defend the assaulters. Not very original, not at all taking the movie seriously, just another symptom of the system.

it is the only show of genuin remorse amoung every one accused and there where women who going with our sensibilities and expectations should have been more inclined to empathy and remorse . . . the movie is anti bystander, even more then it is anti assault, gender realy is not the factor

Even more than that, she gave him a gift. He was genuinely repentant. He tortured himself with what he did, and begged to confess. To have forgiveness probably did more for the man than all the money he made. He even looks better at the end when he gets the package. She gave him the chance to be good again. He could then have a point where he was trusted to do the right thing, and did it. I can see that character getting so much healthier from that point on.

I also like that it's the sleazy, money-grubbing lawyer who has the change of heart, who has a conscience, who has a breakdown and then asks for genuine forgiveness. All the other men in this movie are the supreme do-gooders, like Ryan as the pediatric surgeon who cures kids of their diseases, a veritable "angel." Yet he's just as god-awful and nasty as all the other douchebags in his crowd.

Ironically, the film is about society being anti - woman, but deflecting is what narcissists and "nice guys" do best.

Totally, expert casting choice, right there, since it's a shock for the audience to see them in these kind of dark role, compared to their more lightweight fare!

But I was barely convinced Max was playing someone other than Schmidt

@@fanboy5272 Max, charming as he is, doesn't have tremendous range as an actor. I see Schmidt in every role he plays.

reminds me of a friend of my high school ex, the guy was average looking, was mean to his then girlfriend and she would make excuses for him saying it was all a joke and hes a nice guy.

Ummm adam brody was a bad bad men in Jennifer's body

Exactly. It hits so much even if I live in Russia. It's so unfair

@@liudmilagyu why “even”? The victim blaming culture in Russia is a norm.

I couldn't sleep last night after reading that.

I saw this too. It’s really unfortunate that the legal system has gotten to the point that it’s defended rapists and judged their victims. The movie was making the same point with the attorney having made so many women drop their cases.

There is literally no reason for that except promoting and excusing rape. Just sickness.

It also brought up how much these people dehumanize the victims which is a great parallel to how you never see cassies face after she dies, like the video mentions

Don't let this distract you from the fact that I get bullied because my classmates think my videos are the worst. Please don't agree, dear sin

I know a group of 16y/o boys who take advantage of other teenage girls and excuse themselves as "they wanted it" when called out. The problem is they have a list of girls they target and it's disgusting. They target abused kids, poor kids, kids that have been pregnant before, and kids from single parents. One of the girls they targeted has a single dad, who specialises her and may have molested her. I know this girl and it broke my heart when I told her what they were doing was wrong and she answered "then when will anyone ask me?" 😭 I tried to tell those boys directly to stop because she's vulnerable and they said, "she asks for it." She doesn't, she stays out till late coz she's afraid of her dad, she wears tiny clothes coz that's all she gets and she has no money to get some for herself, and her dad tried to kill her mom when she came to take her and said, "that woman is a slut and will prostitute my child for drug money; that woman ran from him when he tried to kill her, their toddler held on to her mommy to keep her safe and he kicked him on the head and the woman didn't even run away, she was hospitalised and when she got discharged months later he'd remarried.

@@availanila instead of talking about it here, why don't you report it to someone who can do something about it?

So true, you feel your whole world to be a dark place when you realize someone you love is a rapist/violent.

@@alecoloxa this comment sent chills down my spine with it's directness, wording and unwillingness to shy away from a haunting truth. It would feel like being a prisoner in your own private world, and afraid of being judged if unfortunate, unwilling events from the past came to light, even with those you love and trust ☹️ I definitely sense that perspective coming from what looks like a very well done, strongly impacting film.

A film can help you contextualize your own experience or help you empathize with another’s experience, even if it’s radically different from your own. We need less “nice guys” and more empathetic men.

Ayy.. Cheers to you mate. We need more people like you.

wonderful

That's why we need more movies like this

Ya same

Yes! I thought for sure when he shouted at her, “I didn’t do anything” she was going to respond, “Exactly.”

I got shivers. Somehow I didn't see it coming, even though it was set up so perfectly... Bo was the perfect casting.

@@captivatingcurios i totaly saw it coming, but I am a suspicious bitch and way better at guessing twists then I should be, my mother got burned by that casting choice badly though, in the end, she was way more pissed at ryan, then her murderer, claiming he was the worst

It also paints Ryan as a supreme coward. He was a direct eye-witness. Most rapes don't have eye-witnesses. That's why they're so hard to prosecute because they do become "he-said, she-said" trials with little corroborating evidence. But as a mature man in his mid-20s, Ryan was incapable of doing the decent thing and helping Nina when she lodged charges against Al Monroe. It was all sorts of fucked up, what Ryan did.

horrible! why did he have to kill her??

@@oooh19 because it would've been completely unrealistic if he didn't.

Yeah, that's when my mom said "Why does she think she's invincible?"

@@GillDawe he could have like fought her off w/out killing her though. even the video says as much he made a choice to kill

@@oooh19 There are thousands of ways it could've ended differently, I just think this was the most honest. She spent the entire movie putting herself in dangerous situations and walking away fine, that just doesn't seem realistic to me.

That is absolutely DISGUSTING and I am so sorry that happened

that is fucking terrifying jesus christ

I'm co fused

Only when we start firing every teacher with sexual accusations are teachers GOING TO STOP SEXUALLY ABUSING PEOPLE.

When she said “we get reports or assaults every week” i went 😬 Like that… that means your campus has _weekly_ assaults.

The choice of using the bubble-gummy color palette in the movie seems like it was made to be visually enticing to almost make you want to “tune in”, while it explores such a heavy topic that many would like to instinctively turn away from. You said it beautifully.

@@asecretchannel4135 Thank you! You articulated it perfectly

Thought the exact same thing.

@@asecretchannel4135 you may be onto something. But also: Fenell has said that she used those colors because the film is largely about how women are shamed. And often times, women are considered too soft or corny for liking bright colors and pop music, for example. So she wanted that color palette to celebrate those things instead.

@@dead_beatbunny Didn’t know that at all, but that makes sense. A lot of us grow out of liking those sort of colors - on one hand, it is because palettes that bright are associated with childhood or childlike imagery (example: toys and cartoons). It might also have something to do with women being subconsciously taught to look down on things that signal “hyper-femininity”, yet being pushed to put higher value on masculinity. Either way, I think it’s great that the director chose to make the color choice pop so much. It adds so many layers of meaning.

Even earlier than that in reflection is the red flags of him coming back to Cassie after she shit in his drink and gave him a fake number. When he's all jokingly "would you be cool with us being friends but me secretly pining over you"

In all fairness when he came across her she immediately dropped the act, so he had no way of knowing she was pretending to be drunk, to him she seemed 100% in control of her faculties, which she was, so....what do you expect the guy to do?? I think you're glossing over a pretty vital point here

Yes! So many movies about oppression (like "white savior" movies about racism), like to paint oppression as the fault of individuals, and not of the greater system. In the same way "inviting the black guy over for dinner" doesn't solve racism, Cassie killing anybody wouldn't solve the issue of rape culture. It was almost like, to Cassie, Al became the representation of the entire system--which may have been why he was the only one she considered and was willing to physically hurt, that if she just made him repent, if she hurt him, then she could absolve her own guilt and pain.

it would have been a false catharthis though, too wrongs do not make it right. vangence is not justice and that is the thing I respect cassie for, her goal was never to inflict suffering for the sake of making them pay through pain but making them understand what they did and regret, nothing more. She always gave a chance to show remose before, she stops the moment the other got her point, it is well messured. Her killing him and his party would have gone against that and made her the bad guy. there should not be an empowerment in inflicting pain, there should not be encouragment to grow voilant for that will only lead to escalation. Yeah I would have liked for her to live, but she chose revange over her life and probably would not have knowen what to do with herself, if she had sucsseded . . . . revange breakes you, it does not make you stronger of gift you agency . . . I really like the movie for aknowlaging that

I think it's realistic sadly. Unfortunately I think even if she had successfully taken revenge, she would then just be painted as the villain. You see it in domestic abuse cases all the time: if she fights back, all of a sudden she's the abuser. There have been multiple cases where women have called the police about an abusive partner only to get arrested themselves, and then a few weeks or months later they're dead because her partner finally took it even further and murdered her. I also think about Aileen Wuornos. Several of the men she killed were already rapists, she had been raped and abused her entire life and prostitutes face a higher risk of murder than any other group. But the minute she turned that violence back on the abusive men, she was sentenced to death and is remembered as one of America's most evil women. On the rare occasions that women reciprocate men's violence, they are turned into villains.

It's also a more realistic end. A determined, angry man will almost always overpower a woman and seriously injure her if not outright kill her because 90% of men are physically more powerful than 90% of women. And Al Monroe was jacked as shit--you could tell that guy did not skip gym day. So he was likely to be able to kill a small woman with brute strength. This death was also a corrective to all these "abused women who recover to become super-humans who kick ass" movies where someone like tiny, thin Uma Thurman can kill many men with her blade, for example. That almost never happens in real life. But the brutal murder of the avenging woman--that is sadly far more predictable.

They're the assholes, and if they defend him, then aren't they the ones "falling into the trap"?

I'm so sorry, people treated you that way.

@@Senidhr I just want women to be aware. Someone who's friends with everyone will have great protection and be enabled. Its not a woman's fault for taking someone's word or not being educated on things parents failed to teach. Like the watching you drink rule

I'm terribly sorry. It's a shame that women tend to get the entirety of the blame for being assaulted. You didn't deserve that at all.

I'm so sorry to hear about your assault and the way that people responded. That must've been so hard for you and felt so alienating. I believe you and I know you didn't deserve the assault and the mistreatment afterwards. I hope you are able to heal you deserve peace ✌🏻

My best friend was raped and I didn’t take her seriously because “she had taken drugs” (which is no excuse anyway, but I found out later she didn’t mean to take anything-she was drugged). That same year I was raped by my then-boyfriend and I never even told anybody because I thought somehow I had asked for it by going to his apartment that day. I didn’t even really comprehend that I had been raped for two years. That pill is really hard to un-swallow. Every day you learn more. Keep up the good work ❤️

@@eileensnow6153 thankyou so much for sharing and I am so sorry for your experience. I have been on the receiving end of this garbage and one "man" called me a "c*m dumpster" to my face no less. Men do not want to understand or know your history and it enrages me how they turn a blind eye to poor behaviour by their mates but "not all men". The cognitive dissonance is insane. Your a goddess and just know women are waking up to the bs and realising who the real enemy is. You stay strong with your bada*s self

You are on the other side and we are grateful for that! We all been there. ❤️

Yes! For years I never believed I was raped because it was by my boyfriend and "you can't be raped by your boyfriend! Only a scary stranger in a scary situation with a knife next to your neck" it only when I was older and realised I had deep internal trauma from the experience that there are many styles of rape, and it's never the victims fault

@@erinnadia0409 thank you for sharing and and I am so sorry you had to go through that

well he took responsibility for his actions and learned from his mistakes. he deserved forgiveness then

That's actually what Cassie was looking for all along--for someone to remember Nina. It was that simple. Notice that when she confronted everyone else in the Nina rape case, no one remembered her. It was only when Cassie prompted them did they suddenly recall that this woman Nina existed at all. It happened with the dean, it happened with Cassie's former woman friend, it happened with Ryan, it happened with Al. Only when she got to the lawyer did the lawyer immediately say, "Yeah, it's Nina. I remember her. I feel so guilty about what I did to her." That's when Cassie realized--"Oh, he's one of the good guys. He fucking remembers Nina!!!!" It was that simple. Which makes it even sadder, if you think about it.

I find it interesting that people have the criticism "all the men in this movie are portrayed as bad", but when you look at the movie critically all characters are portrayed as flawed, many as complicit and the one character who seems to get some form of redemption is a man

Especially since the only character who recognized his misdeeds and was willing to repent, was a man.

Thank you for commenting this, it's about the whole system and looking inward at what we can all do to not be complicit in sexual crimes that very, very rarely are brought to justice. There is a lot to do still and men who get defensive about these issues instead of looking to what can be done to change them are a huge hurdle.

Said perfectly 👍

yeah, obviously it is not all men, so not the point, just as the movie adresses how other women are just as problematic as bystanders and enablers, every single one of us should ask themselfs, where might I be art of the problem, for in some way or another, everyone of us is

This makes my blood boil

“He had a bad day.” They say. As if he’s victims’ had been having a good one. As if his victims haven’t had the worst day of their entire lives. “He was struggling with sex addiction.” They reason. As if he’s the only one. As if plenty of other sex addict haven’t managed not to commit murder. “It wasn’t about race.” They claim. As if six of his eight victims weren’t Asian women. As if he didn’t target three Asian American owned businesses. “He had a bad day.” Says the sheriff. As women are filled with fear. As Asian American hate rises every day. “He had a bad day.” Says the sheriff. And I wonder, and other minorities wonder, “What could I get away with on a bad day. What would they let me do.” I stare at my dark skin. I tuck my keys between my knuckles. It’s not safe at night. It’s not safe in the daytime. “What could we get away with on a bad day?” Nothing. Nothing at all.

@Number Nine I have a taser and I don’t do anything that requires me to walk around at night. I’m not old enough to drink so I don’t go clubbing or anything. But it’s still intimidating. I use my keys as a weapon so if someone follows me to my house I can unlock the door quickly.

@Number Nine and you’re right. A lot of the time bravado is a useful skill

@Number Nine I know.

he literally tells him..its not ur fault.

Well, not all men. I'd have immediately called the police on his ass. Killing someone and then covering up the murder is not part of the "bro code" for a lot of men...

​@@Luboman411nOt aLl mEn. Then she's not talking about you then, is she?

I hope you are living a good life and that you are doing well. 💗

Sorry for what happened!!!

Why do you think is that? I've also been raped..by my that-time boyfriend and never went to police either. Still don't understand why 12 years later...

@@Irisea In my case it was because I was on a date with him. I went to his place willingly. Broke students who couldn't afford going out much, so cooking for each other was a regular date. If I had gone to the police, best case scenario would be I get to tell my story and get to relive my trauma with an audience, there goes one tallymark in the column of rape cases, they tell me there is zero evidence to build a case, and nothing ever happens again. That's the best case scenario. So I didn't bother. What will it accomplish?

​@@AnnekeOosterink but this is so freaking sad...not to go to police because they would simply sweep it under a carpet...I wonder if it was any different in case it was a female police..

Yeah. What an amazing debut! I’m looking forward to seeing what she does next.

@@JuriAmari I highly recommend watching Killing Eve! Emerald was also a writer for that show!

@@looncroon what! This entire time I was like seeing similarities between Killing Eve and this film here and there. Now I know why haha!

Woah, that is extremely impressive! The entire film is so extremely well done. Damn, Fennell is truly a promising powerhouse director.

Wow! I didn't know that! And all these years they were saying women are not Oscar nominees because they don't make good movies...

YES I loved an interview where the director said she kept seeing responses to the trailer like "cant wait to see her kill all these guys!" and "this is gonna be like Kill Bill 2.0!" and how shocked she was, since neither the trailers nor the movie had any physical violence against the men Cassie interacted with. It's so crazy cool how the cinematography for this film played with audience expectations based on old female revenge films. I want it to sweep awards season, but so far it's more been swept under the rug :(

@@hobihope2981 Do you remember where she did that interview with?

@@hobihope2981 it is like Kill Bill but feminist.

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Her "mind games" was disturbing. I can call it violence too.

I'm so sorry that happened to you. It was not okay in any way. Sending love your way and wishing you the best.

Oh my god, I hate your parents.

Parents can be so dumb !

Oof. I'm so sorry that not only this happened, but also that your parents say this awful stuff. You definitely made the right choice dumping this worthless cockroach.

Uh...im sorry you feel that way

Preaching to the choir.

Me too, I always look forward for their next video.❤️

Same

Mine too, their analysis always brings some much needed comfort and distraction in this harrowing time.

what a creep! there are antistalking laws

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Echh that's a reaction that sticks

With that reaction maybe your father could be lke your stalker. Yikes.

You deserve a better father. I’m so sorry

Fuck... I just watched that picture, it broke my fucking heart, oh my god.

you got rapists and war criminals in every army of every ethnicity. I am garantying you that at this moment you will have ukrainian soldiers inacting worcrimes against russians if they only get their hands on them . . . . on the flip side, you also have the best of people on both sides of every conflict as well, picture book germans who risked and lost their lifes hiding and defending jews, russian soldiers defending their enemies most vunerable . . . there never is true moral supiriotrety owned by one side. I totaly agree with you, that the mentality, "no our boys do not do that" is rubbish and not despite, but especialy in the name of the honorable and not trash soldiers of one side, one should absolutly call out and punish those who did those crimes. The moment you cover for someone elses crimes in any way, you taint your whole side or organisation with it. Best example for that is the catholic church that did more harm then actualy protecting its image by covering up the rampend abuse happening in its ranks, enabeling the offenders and causing even more harm doing so . . . victims and survivors derserve justice, but even thinking selfishly, the course of covering for rapists does not make sense

@@irana913 That's one of the reasons the U.S. lost the war. They also murdered children. It takes a special kind of psycho to aim a rifle at a child and pull the trigger.

The My Lai massacre was a horrific incident that destroyed any last vestiges of respect I had for the U.S. when I found out about it in high school.

Thank you for highlighting this. I Wish this topic was more talked about and had more visible activism against it. Words will never be enough to express my hatred and disgust of war crimes esp the ones that involve torture and SA.

And it still does get slammed with criticism. Mostly from the type of people this movie calls out

@@alyssapinon9670 Most people don't respond well to a mirror held in front of their faces

@@ahhh4117 damn straight. Self reflection who now?

@jermaine tobin the overwhelming majority of rapes are not reported. Of those reported, the overwhelming majority of rapists are not punished. Of those punished, the overwhelming majority of them only serve a fraction of their jail time, if they serve at all. The title of this film is a tribute to one such case. This is basic info dude. Basic.

People still thinks such things only happen to women who did something to deserve it....But the truths is it can happen to everyone to your sister, to your bother, to your mother........to someone you like and respect.

@jermaine tobin every woman knows it s like that in real life, police will hardly believe the victims report. You’re a man and probably never had to worry about these things. You’re the idiotic here

@jermaine tobin Why does the truth seem idiotic to you?

@jermaine tobin why don’t you

@jermaine tobin 🙄

agree. your comment also seems to trigger a lot of male cry babies.

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The construction worker/catcalling thing works too. Don’t react, but don’t ignore either. Just stare. It freaks them out something fierce :)

And in my mind it’s implied that he only drank the spit coffee (attempted to acknowledge his own actions) because he was interested in her romantically/sexually. I doubt he would have gone for it if he wasn’t interested in her.

Me too! I liked how this film doesn't focus directly on the assaulted woman, but rather her vengeful best friend. Although some might wish that we'd actually seen Nina on screen so that we could connect to her more, I liked that we never did, since we get to see how much Nina meant to Cassie through her actions.

Well said! One of the reasons I enjoyed it so much is because it subverted my expectations at every turn. From the soundtrack to the color palette, to how the story itself unfolded.

I’m always annoyed whenever a movie or a tv show portrays almost all of the male characters at being sexual harassers or jerks. Probably because I know too many guys who are not like this in real life. I’m not kidding, a lot of the men I know are in committed relationships and let the women they’re dating or married to make all of the decisions.

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@Me We No, it isn't. Most rapists (like murders) are committed by people known to the victim. This is always said and it's inaccurate and just shows your hypocrisy.

@Me We nah. It really isn't. Most rapes are committed by someone the victim knows.

Just because a woman dresses a certain way does not not not justify sexual assault or rape...ever. Any more than "she was a prostitute" does.

Thank you!! Just because you are dressed a certain way DOES NOT GIVE CONSENT and does NOT mean you deserve bad things to happen to you

@Me We and what would you say to the rape victims who were wearing hijabs? What about the ones wearing niqabs?

That’s republicans for you always shifting the rules to suit them

@@alicianelson1252 That's *Men* for you always shifting the rules to suit them. John Oliver did a lovely examination of the inquiry, and contrasted it to Anita HIll's. Truly, regardless of the religion of politics, it's spooky how history repeats itself.

I am still completely repulsed by how the "steep costs" is still women's lives. This is where y'all gone lose people because why should the cost of people wanting to live and not be mistreated also be our very lives. Why is the cost of preventing harm more harm to us? All to make people who hate and mistreat us stop? And rarely is there any accountability and actual change. I mean she did all of this and everybody is still horrible. Like 99% of the time she holds the mirror up to their face and they just close their eyes. Rarely did we see her hold this mirror up to people and see that prompt change in their behavior. They'll just write her off as a crazy bitch and keep it pushing. The one person that actually made a change, did it without her having to do the labor. And the most damning part of the movie is that, we are still centering the oppressors/the perpetrators in this scenario. So it's like what have we really accomplished here? Honestly this movie serves as a consequence of doing work this way. You sacrifice yourself for a very hollow and shallow victory and ultimately nothing changes. Like this is the result of trying to convince your oppressors to give up their power. They won't. They will throw you a bone every once in a while, so they can essentially use that as a distraction for them to shift and change their tactics. And then my last critique is the abusers are finally going to jail ending. I get it. I understand why that feels good. But validating the criminal justice system is honestly more harmful than it is good. Like the criminal justice system is notoriously horrible for victims of sexual assault, and generally unhelpful even if you get your case off the ground and win. We got to stop positioning this situation as a lack of access to the criminal justice system, and somehow gaining access to that would make things better for victims, and I don't believe that to be true. I am really ragging on this movie, and I really don't mean to, but it's just so green.This movie should only serve as an entry point. We've moved past this conversation.

@@birdiewolf3497 great point!

@Akshay 18 omg pls get out of here. I can't even begin to explain to you how wrong your statement is. the problem is not WITH US.

I don't see anything wrong if reciprocated violence is based in self preservation.

Reminds me of a research paper that I've been working on for school lately, it's a paper on laws that protect children online but so many people are compliant and actively try to overturn the few laws there are that protect kids from online predators because they see it as a "right" to engage with children they don't know online. It's sickening.

They saw themselves in the nice guys and the perpetrators and knew they’re ways were being brought to light. And of course didn’t like it. They took a look in the mirror and didn’t like what they saw staring back

@@bronchitisbabe4047 yup. As the old saying goes: hit dogs holler

@jermaine tobin the irony of your comment being a perfect example of it

They can have it out it therapy without wishing ill upon the art. Just because you didn’t like something, it has to fail? Utterly childish of them.

You're right. I didn't know her name. Honestly I didn't know she was still alive.

Well in all fairness she didn’t reveal her identity to the public until September 2019, Brock Turner has been infamous since the assault in January 2015

the ultimate "nice guy"

I didn't know that; the not so "nice" guy has a long history it seems.

And Apollo is one of the nicer gods. Zeus and Poseidon are awful. Many, many of Zeus’ stories involve him raping someone. I think Ares might be one of the only Greek gods that doesn’t have a myth where he rapes or kidnaps someone. There’s actually a myth where he kills a man for raping one of the Amazons, who are his daughters

@@cynthiaanderson6410 what about Hades? I thought he's the only good greek god because also in the original story of Persephone he didn't knap and rape her. She wanted to see the underworld and chose to take the fruit after she fell in Love with him. I read somewhere there was some kind of overturn in greek.society from matriarchy to patriarchy that lead to many myths around women and goddesses to be reinterpreted in a more misogynistic way like also the tale of medusa where Athena didn't actually punish her but gave her the power to turn men into stone to protect herself.

@@rene3759 there’s no “good” or “bad” Greek gods. They’re very morally gray. Some (Zeus) are worse than others. Hades is on the good side, but he has his moments. An example of this is the story of Mynthe. She was a nymph tied to the river Stix. Hades brought her to his palace because he thought she was hot. Mynthe did not reciprocate those feelings. Persephone was pissed. Hades turned Mynthe into a plant (the first mint plant) instead of cheating on Persephone. Mynthe, who wasn’t interested in the first place would have probably preferred just being let go.

Me too! I adore the cinematography and the aesthetics, plus they managed to get "Star are Blind" stuck in my head for days! 😂

The soundtrack is amazing. It's been 2 months since I've seen it and the main song is still stuck in my head. The lyrics are perfect.

the "not like other girls" trope. thinking that only "certain" women have things happen to them. viewing themselves as "better" but other women are "weak" according to them

The assaulter‘s. Most of the time they‘re men.

Yes! Good point.

Talk that shit!💯💯👍

It makes me so happy that many men including you watched this movie with an open mind instead of getting defensive. Thank you. It makes speaking up about these issues much less terrifying

@jermaine tobin It means a lot of us are either misogynist or enable misogyny by not standing up to our male friends when they are being disrespectful or even abusive towards women

Thank you for this reaction! So well put!

@@alyssapinon9670 Like the weirdest part to me is the fact that men get defensive. Like, there are also women villains in this movie, and the one person who gets redeemed is a dude. This movie is clearly not misandrist but feminist, and it boils my blood sometimes that some men are too sexist to even see that.

@@allyli1718 but the women villains are the type of people who make shitty men feel better about their behavior, and they would typically use these women to say “see?! They’re women but they agree with me.” This movie is coming for everyone and misogynists hate it. It’s very frustrating to see but hey at least it weeds out the crappy guys for us.

Good eye! The scene where they argue, Ryan is also wearing a blue shirt. His wardrobe never symbolises he's on her side.

Also in the original script Alison Brie’s character is wearing a blue sweater in the restaurant scene

+

tho she's wearing a blue dress when she meets jordan

wowww!!

Real “I’ll help you bury the body but won’t share a jail cell” energy here. Pitiful. Loved it. * chef’s kiss *

YES! 🙌🏻