What OP's wife did is a criminal offense in Florida. There have been children kidnapped this way or died of heat stroke after only ten or fifteen minutes.
I used to live in So. FL. You remember the story about the Mom who put her son in his car seat & then unloaded her groceries into the trunk? The car was stolen while she was doing that. When the thief noticed the son in the back seat, he left the son, on the side of a road, still strapped into his car seat. Thankfully, the thief realized he would have been charged with kidnapping besides car theft... that's why he left the son somewhere.
@@dinarusso3320 any parents that do this are terrible. Are you saying it's ok to leave a child in a car? that seems the only reason why you would defend her. Stand up for dads that do the right thing and are good parents
The one with the baby did NOT go too far. You're absolutely wrong on that one. She kept leaving him alone in the car. She said she'd stop, but she didn't. On top of not stopping, the car wasn't even locked. She needed to feel the full weight of her ignorance in not listening to her husband about the safety of their child. He didn't go too far. She was too stupid to listen to him and paid the price.
Exactly! I agree. His wife was just asking to get robbed, and for her child to be kidnapped. Unbelievable! That woman should NOT be a mother if she's going to risk the life of children like that. Even in a safe town/city, you NEVER leave a baby alone, nor should you leave the car unlocked!
@GretchTheZ If he calls the police, there's going to be charges laid (not by the husband). Keep them the HELL out of your familial arguments AT ALL COSTS. Now ... How he really needs to illustrate his point is to sit her down and calmly and rationally explain his point of view, why he did what he did and the potential outcomes in DETAIL. Immediately followed by the simple question: How would you explain to the police that you left our child unattended to allow this to even possibly happen ? How would you explain this to ME if this hadn't been me spotting your car and our son was ACTUALLY taken ?
@GretchTheZ that is not the answer. She may have some post partum depression going on. So she needs counseling and parenting classes. Maybe a nanny while it gets figured out. No baby should ever be left in the car locked or not.
Story number two: As a police officer, I agree with OP. He asked her not to do it, he explained to her his concerns and she totally ignored them. He is right, anyone could’ve taken that child. He, as the father, had a right to protect his child and to teach her a lesson. It would’ve been worse for her if it had not been for him. I have dealt with many disasters dealing with children and ignorant irresponsible parents! Maybe she doesn’t understand that there is a market for selling babies and small children. She needs to get over herself real quick. If that was my child, I would not trust her!
OP was correct. He should also get full custody via divorce proceedings. Unfortunately, it's only through a divorce that ANY parent can invoke parental rights over the other parent. Otherwise, he is negligently leaving his child in the care of an irresponsible person. If she was a babysitter, she'd get sued (or at least sacked from the job with no references).
Just a few years ago, a mom made that mistake at a local gas station. Not only did he steal the car / child, it ended up in a high speed chase on the highway. The kid was physically OK, but you can imagine there are lasting effects from that day.
So you spend every single minute with your kid? No showers, no toilet, food prep, errands, nothing? Never? Ever? I doubt it. I guess growing up Gen X as a latch-key kid means we were left alone quite a bit. Must be why some kids turned out to be helicopters. PS - If that was my husband, he would have been dead because I would have murdered him in a blind rage.
The real question in the 1st story is: What about the other passengers? If the bus was full, then there were several people who could have given up their seats, but apparently they all sat there uninvolved while OP was treated like a monster.🤔
idk about other places but in my country there are 4-8 designated spots for people with disabilities, pregnant or older people. If you choose to sit there and someone comes along that needs that seat you are required to give up your seat. But with any other seat you're definitely not required to do that.
My thoughts on the matter exactly! When OP declined, go to someone else and try again. I think ignoring the woman was a bad approach. Before the woman even had a chance to ask, it would have been better to look right at her and say something like "I'd give you my seat but I've been standing/walking all day and need this seat". That way, it's defused before it even starts. Sometimes the best defense is a preemptive attack.
Yeah, it was an "everyone sucks". Here in Quebec, old people, handicap and pregnant woman have priorities (we have a rule about it and poster are in the windows about it). I even live a situation where a bus driver bark at passengers to give their seat to an old man. (I didn't have a seat to give).
Well, there is a common rule in my country, that you should free your seat for pregnant, old or disabled. And we have designated spots for this people, so if you taken this spot - you must release it.
I agree with what the OP did in the second story. If a parent can take a baby from an unlocked car think about what can happen if a woman who wanted a baby took a baby from the car?
@@YumeBuru Yeah, I heard too many stories of women who either can't have kids or wanted a baby to trap a spouse or a boyfriend and took a baby from a hospital or a when a mother wasn't paying attention.
Like I remember the worse story where a woman nearly got away with a baby in a stroller and actually took advantage of the crowd to attack/detain the father thinking he was a stocker. I mean hell the story can be fake, but just the story from what I remember it was super depressing because this is all in the POV of the Father. Who despite came into the (Parking lot... or Park) with his Wife, she had to run back into the store because she forgot something, and that Random Woman almost got away.
I agree with the father. She said she’d never again leave their child in the car alone and what does she do? Leaves the baby alone in an unlocked car! For more than 6 minutes! That’s child endangerment and shows what a lazy ahole she is for lying to her husband. And like everyone who has no defense for their bad behavior, they get mad a the person who has a valid gripe.
2nd story, leaving a baby in the car by himself, that’s divorce grounds. He did not go too far. He told her to stop, and she didn’t. She learned a hard lesson.
Did she actually learn anything? She wanted OP to apologize. If it were to happen again, he should call the police and divorce her. He would have no problem getting custody.
Right? I’d actually leave someone over that. If you can’t keep our kid safe and try to make me feel like the bad guy for keeping our kid safe, and constantly show unsafe behaviours regarding our kid, I’m leaving and taking the kid with me and going for full custody
Second Story: OP definitely wasn’t the AH, but I feel like he needs to talk to police and scare his wife straight about leaving the baby in the car and the charges she could face.
The way he did it was acceptable too. She said no mother should experience that, well she wasn't thinking about that before when she left her child in the vehicle. Police are often busy and the way he handles it was a great way to make sure it will never happen again. But I'm the type of person that if given no alternative I'll always chose a child's safety over an adults.
Donna Gregory: I second your opinion. In my state(VA) it is illegal to leave a child in a car unattended. My own mother did this when we were small, my 3 year old brother knocked her car out of gear and the car went rolling. Thank God that a friend of our father literally stopped the car and waited with us until mother returned. He made sure to inform my father who was furious. It wasnt the first time or the last, but we survived. I wouldnt even leave my teenagers alone in a car.
@@kballard27 , you'd need to call the police and explain things, or there might be some way that you could end up in trouble. In this situation, the police might play along with you to scare her.
“No mother should experience the fear…” She literally set up that situation to happen for real! If she is not taking precautions, that is the BEST way to get the message through
#2: in most states, leaving a baby in the car JUST FOR A MOMENT can get baby taken away by CPS, and mommy in jail. The wife is lucky. OP is NTA. his wife is. #3: Why tell them to leave? Just call police immediately. EK and family are horrible people.
@GretchTheZ I don't know what year the story takes place in (I'd guess 70s or earlier). I can tell ya that my mother left me in the car more than once. One particular time, I managed to screw up a whole fire drill (from what I was told years later, it was generally ok to park in the spot my parents car was in, but not that day). when my mother returned to the car there was a crowd of people (firefighters included) trying to figure out how to move the car without waking me up. Another time, during an earthquake, my mother ran out of the apt trying to find a safer place, and guess who was left behind. she's dead now, but if you had asked her, she'd tell you she did nothing wrong, and it was safe to do all this.
Yep. I would have called police while standing out the front, explain the situation, and have them all trespassed. Possibly a restraining order as well.
The second story, I don’t think op went too far. She needed to learn her lesson. Sure he scared his wife do death, but he’s right. She was being incredibly irresponsible and her son could have easily been kidnapped due to her negligence.
I agree. He could have even gone further if needed. I grew up knowing a kid with severe brain damage because their mother left them in a vehicle cooking their brain. That kid was such a kind kid, but their life was irrevocably changed and shortened by a neglectful parent. I'll always remember and miss that great kid.
Sometimes a traumatic scare is what it takes to get the point across. Causing trauma to someone is commonly wrong, however some people don't learn if they don't experience at least a taste of what could be if they don't listen. Generally when you tell someone not to do something, they are either going to do it or want to do it. A majority are like that, while others take that as advise. It takes a wise man to learn from his mistakes, but an even wiser man to learn from others.
As a mother, that woman deserved the lesson. You NEVER and I mean NEVER leave your child in the car, even for two seconds. I don't care how inconvenient it is, you take your kid in the store with you every single time.
Depends on where you live really. If it’s a shady country/area then yes. If it’s not then it won’t hurt to leave the baby a couple of minutes (not many minutes mind you) but make sure to lock the doors. 🤔😬
@@Emsev100 Nope, sorry. A predator or thief could be hanging out in the nicest areas, and it takes a carjacker only seconds to break into a car. There is NEVER a reason to leave a child unattended in a car, any more than leaving a baby on the front porch for "just a couple of minutes". Tragedies can happen so fast your head spins.
@@Emsev100 Probably not most of the time but you're still gambling with your child's life. No it doesn't depend on where you live. There are crazy people EVERYWHERE. The world is very dangerous and you don't gamble with your baby's life.
The second story: I definitely agree with what OP did. Clearly even after he explained the dangers to her, she couldn't get it through her head so I don't think much else would have stopped her from doing this again and again. And besides, even if they did argue about it over and over that's so much more stress over a much longer period of time than just doing what he did and being done with it. I don't think it was too far given her actions, especially not even locking the car.
Story 1: in Australia (and I’m sure a lot of other countries!) we have Priority seats on all modes of transport (usually orange instead of purple/blue for Victoria) If someone that is not: Pregnant,Injured, limited walk/stand ability, or anything like that is sitting in one of those seats, they have to give it up to someone who *does* have one of those things. If they refuse, they get a fine.
Second Story: Imagine you leave you're baby in the car to pop to the bank, but then something happens to you. No one will know the baby is there or where your car is. How long might it take the husband or police to find the baby?
Six minutes and she was gone when he got there and while he was taking the baby into his car. That means approximately 10 minutes all together. She most definitely owes HIM an apology.
Can I just say that the dude who took his son out of his wife’s car was absolutely correct. Does his wife not see the news? Who leaves their BABY alone in an unlocked car? His wife wasn’t even keeping an eye on the vehicle from inside the store, as she didn’t see the dad take the boy out of the car. So, if it was a true kidnapping, it would 100% be on the mom who left the child in the car, after promising not to do it. Better a couple moments of “inconvenience” in taking the child out of their seat and returning him to his seat, than losing the child forever and need to live with that for the rest of your life. I wonder who she would have blamed for the loss of her child if that were to happen. She needed to feel that depth of panic, in a safe way, so that maybe she won’t need to feel the depth of loss and sorrow permanently.
This happened 44 1/2 yrs ago, I was the heavily pregnant woman on the bus, it was a week & half before I actually delivered my son & I was on the bus early morning commute & I was heading to my dr’s appt. I was having some problems with the pregnancy, I ended up standing on the bus for a good 120+ “blocks”, completely surrounded by women, I never once asked someone to give up their seat for me, a week later I caught the same bus & was standing in the midst of several men who were sitting, they offered me a seat & I turned it down. One of the men stood up & they actually put me in the seat saying, no woman that pregnant should be standing. I thanked them & we all got to talking, imagine their surprise when they found out I was due anytime & that I had actually had to stand the week before. I’m almost 69 now, use a walker & still will not ask for a seat.
That dad is NOT the ahole. I would have done the SAME thing. That "mom" needs to learn to take her child with her and never live him behind. Its a tragedy waiting to happen. SMDH
Exactly. It's funny how everyone's so quick to give the father a hard time when he's concerned about his BABY getting kidnapped out of a car!!! If that were a man who left a baby in the car, everyone would be sympathetic to the woman!!! Ridiculous!
Kidnapping and heat stroke are some of my biggest fears as a mother and the idea of leaving them alone in a car is sickening... It is difficult to be a parent and leaving them in a car while you'll "just be a minute" is not some life hack it is a terrible idea...
@GretchTheZ But how old where you when they did? My mom did when I was 10 or so too but I also knew how to roll down the windows, keep the doors locked, and not talk to strangers. There is a point were it does become okay but this is a baby. If your parents left you in the car as a defenseless kid (0-9) then they are lucky you didn't die or get kidnapped... My oldest is 9 so yes I have concerns about leaving any of my 4 kids in the car at such young ages.
Ok so here's a thought for you: I'm legally blind, but I don't look like there's something wrong with me. if I have my white cane folded there is no way for you to know my sense of balance is utter crap and if I stand on the bus I run a very serious risk of fall9ing over. I have been in so many situations where people stare, huff, or outright scold me for not giving up my seat for them. I'm usually like mate, there are 30+ other people on this bus and at least ONE of them should have less of a reason to be seated than me, so get off my back! That said, if I can tell that someone is in dire need of a seat, due to being elderly, moving slowly or generally showing signs of having a really hard time of keeping their balance, i will offer my seat, unfold my white cane, and loudly say something along the lines of "I'm sorry it takes a blind person to see sense!"
It's a bit ridiculous to just target 1 person when you want to sit down. I'm glad I've never been on that side of things. I have trouble with one of my hips and can not stand on moving vehicles, last time I tried, an ambulance had to be called because I got injured pretty badly. Now I have a cane so people usually don't bother me... working hard to get rid of it but since aquiring the cane achievement, I no longer take transit.
I'm likely to get static for this but personally I think that OP expressing his view that the woman made several life choices of her own is NTA. He is vary correct that the woman made all those choices and neither his choice to remain seated or to make the comment that the woman made her own choices and that he isn't obliged to take action making up for those choices. I personally have a bad back caused by an accident at work which makes standing, walking, or even laying flat for any long periods torture. Will I give up a seat on a bus for an expectant woman? That depends on how long I've had for my back to recover and how long I will have to be standing and/or walking before I can sit again. And yes, any expectant woman using her condition to try and guilt me into deciding differently than the condition of my back demands will be told about their life choices. BTW, Just looking at me will give no clue about the condition of my back.
@@TheOneAndOnlyFen this. And it seems like people always manage to target someone who actually needs the seat. I was taking a bus with an injured shoulder and using my other arm to support the injured one from jostling too much. Which leaves me with exactly zero hands to balance with. I had someone try and force me out of my seat (which was not in the disabled/elderly/pregnant section) because "I can see there's nothing wrong with you", even though I was visibly wincing every time the bus went over a pothole. Like nah, I'm not moving. They refused to give a reason for why they needed the seat "because *HIPAA*", but demanded I tell them why I needed it. Yeah... On the way back nobody would give me a seat, despite now sporting a sling, and the only reason I didn't faceplant was another passenger caught me as I fell.
Story 2, OP already talked to her and she said she'd stop and then she didn't. OP needed to demonstrate WHY it's so important to not do that because she quite literally didn't listen to reason. That was absolutely the NEXT step and not an overreaction. Overreaction would probably be letting her call the cops. And she's LUCKY that it was OP that found them and not a cop or an actual kidnapper. If it was a cop, she'd be facing serious charges, if it was a kidnapper.. well that's the worst consequence, now isn't it. And she'd STILL be charged.
STORY REGARDING THE PHOTO IN THE BEGINNING; OP went and talked to them! The contractor of that building built that neighbors house as well. There were a lot of cut corners and the couple (neighbors) had to spend over 40k ontop of the original house payment just to fix what was built horribly. So they were actually good people :)
I thought about something like that too ! Either it was a Karen, or a nice neighbour who have extra infos on the house that people should know before buying it ; or the seller was the Karen and the neighbour suspect they would lie in order to get a better deal
Baby story: as a father, I can say with complete certainty that OP was not the asshole. The wife was the triple asshole here: (1) by leaving her son on the car... repeatedly!, putting her mere comfort and convenience over her son's safety... only an irresponsible egotistical monster does that, (2) by making a promise and breaking it, thus rendering her word worthless (promises and keeping your word are a HUGE deal for me), and (3) after being caught endangering her son AND breaking her promise, again putting herself on top of the situation by insisting that SHE needed an apology, while completely ignoring her breaking a promise and her endangering her son.
When I was around 34-35 weeks pregnant, my mom and I went Christmas shopping. While my mom was in line paying, I decided to use the chair (yes, they only had one) right outside the dressing rooms to rest for a bit from all the walking we had done. Anyway, a short time later, this older lady comes to me and asks if she could sit down because she was tired. I just said yes and got up. I think she hadn’t realized I was pregnant because when she finally sat down and was facing my belly directly, her eyes went wide and tried to get up and give me my seat back. I said it was fine, and not to worry, that my mom was almost done paying anyway. I don’t think she was entitled. Just a clueless old lady. I was lucky I wasn’t having any pains or swollen feet at the time, so it didn’t bother me too much.
@@reh3884 Dude. She never said her being pregnant trumped being old. She said she gave up the seat for the old lady and the *old lady* tried to give it back when she noticed OP was expecting... and OP didn't take the seat back.
I don't think the dad taking his son out of his wife's car was in the wrong at all. I don't care if someone is just running inside a store for a quick minute you should never leave your child unattended in a car for any reason. He could have been a bigger asshole and left the parking lot completely and let her think her son was kidnapped but he didn't. I think it was a good little wake up call for the wife and hopefully she never does it again. I have 2 kids of my own yes it's annoying to have to take them in and out of the car but that's just something you have to do when you take your kids somewhere. Love your videos Peace and love to you and your family 💙💚💙💚💙💚
My question is, if she's running errands, why is the husband not parenting? If he's working, and she needs to run errands, then what? A baby sitter? Ok. The "the baby could be kidnapped" is fair but there's a whole reality of logistics too.
1st story - I guess OP was sitting in all the seats on the bus? Why did it have to be OP? No one else except the old man gave up their seat but they only screamed at OP. Why didn’t the woman ask someone else? 2nd story - nothing ever happens until it does. Wife needed a wake-up call about how her laziness and unwillingness to be the least bit inconvenienced to ensure the safety of the baby. This is a hill OP needs to die on since it can literally lead to the death or kidnapping of his son.
I totally agree with you on the 1st story. That was my thought to. OP told her politely why they didn't feel like giving up their seat. The pregnant woman should have respected that and asked someone else. Or someone else who heard his explanation should have offered. I also don't agree with Fluff that OP was an a-hole for "berating" the woman for getting pregnant. I agree with OP there. OP is not obligated to accommodate someone else's life choices, at OP's own detriment (the detriment being additional pain from standing on their feet again). In my opinion.
I agree. 1rst story the OP is NTA! and indeed it is a choice to make kids or not, parents are very often entitled just because they have kids, but I don't see how this is anyone else's responsibility.
First story: Unless he is sitting in a priority seating area (which is actually for those who are elderly or disabled (and pregnancy is NOT a disability)), he is under absolutely no obligation to move. The fact his sister and parents chewed him out show that they are the ahole not him. Again, unless you are elderly or physically disabled, you are not entitled to a seat on a bus. Fill stop. End of list. Period. 2nd story: What that mother did is actually a felony in many states. It is called child endangerment.
He’s not *the* asshole here, but he definitely is *an* asshole. Maybe that’s the way I was brought up, but even I with scoliosis and pain standing up for extended amounts of time, would have given my seat for the pregnant lady. (Had she continued being respectful about it, that is.) the moment she started insulting and crying is the moment I draw the line. Again, not THE asshole here, but I don’t think it’s very nice to purposefully ignore a pregnant woman asking to sit.
@@clownrat5759 from my pov, someone with pain from injuries like OP or a chronic condition like you have at least as much right to a seat as anyone burdened by pregnancy. Only healthy people have any moral incentive to offer their seat, and you can rarely see who's healthy or in pain on the outside in public.
@@clownrat5759 then be mad at all the other people on the bus who saw what was happening and none of them offered their seat. He said no she should’ve taken that. He was tired and had every righty to avoid (ignore) the situation he knew was coming.
@@clownrat5759 Sorry but she should have just moved on to another seat once she realized that he was not going to give up his seat. Also, why out of all the seats on the bus did he need to give up his seat? That is why I pretend to be asleep if I am ever on a bus. People leave you alone
Worked at a job that had me on my feet for 10 hours a day. So no I would not give my seat to anyone not disabled. I have also given birth to two 9lb babies never asked for a seat on a bus.
In Australia it’s illegal to leave a child unattended in a vehicle & you would be charged with child endangerment!!! Blows my mind that anyone thinks it’s acceptable behaviour!!!
That second story... NEVER EVER leave your kid alone in the car. I used to live in Las Vegas and every year there was a story about a kid dying because their parent left them alone in the car. Even if the kid doesn't get snatched, they can suffocate, cook to death, get stung by a bee and have an allergic reaction, someone could hit your car, your brakes could fail and the car can roll into traffic. People have literally murdered their kids by "forgetting" to take them out of the car.
Absolutely! The EM was already warned. Charge her and all adults with criminal tresspass, and they pay for clean up. Get a restraining order against her too.
Yeah, police call immediately, report it, as if they get hurt, the property owners can be taken to court and they'll need documentation to protect themselves.
Third story about the pool behind the house. If any one of those "intruders" had been injured in any way, the homeowner would have been legally liable - even though the "intruders" had never been invited. When my brother, whose house was rural, had a pool put in behind his house, his insurance agent warned him thoroughly about the potential liabilities. The pool, according to the agent, is what he called, "an attractive nuisance". The bare minimum my brother had to do was to put a chain link fence which had to be locked when the pool was not in use. Of course, my brother put it in and, thankfully, never had an issue.
2nd story: OP did the right thing. He didn’t let it go on for too long, just long enough. I hope she realizes soon that no matter what, your child shouldn’t be left in the car alone. I’m 20 and live with my dad, and whenever I stay in the car, he gives me the keys and says ‘lock the doors’ and if I don’t, I always get a lecture on how I need to lock the doors.
Totally agree with the OP in the 2nd story. He talked to her before about it and she had promised not to but low and behold she does it anyway. She would have continued as it’s convenient for her to just leave him in the car. She had to learn from her mistake and thank goodness it was her hubby that saw his baby left in the unlocked car and not someone else. She should be grateful and take it as lesson learned. She apparently has to learn the hard way.
When I was pregnant with my first child I had to take the bus to and from work. I never asked anyone or demanded that anyone give me their seat. If someone offered depending how I was feeling I either accepted or declined.
First story: Yeah no. You only get respect as long as you give it. The moment you start calling people names because they didn't give you what you wanted is the moment you stop deserving to be treated with respect. That line about pregnancy being a choice was perfect and she deserved to hear it.
“No mother should have to go through that fear” then don’t freaking leave your kid alone with no supervision for possibly 10 min! So yeah, op is NTA, he wasn’t ‘cruel’. I would have been cruel and waited for police to show up first, so they can chew her out for endangering the kid like that too. Maybe he should have, cause she clearly still hasn’t learned her lesson
With the second story, she said that no mother should have to endure that. However, no father should have to endure that, too. She got herself into that one. I don't feel sorry for her, at all.
The story behind that picture is they had the same builder, trusted them with inspection and have spent a ton of money fixing a TON of things. They’re trying to save people money. Plus the other house from what I understand had been under construction for a suspicious amount of time.
Yepp, have seen the whole picture somewhere. It's probably cheaper to crap the building than to fix it and that's what you could see just from the photography
@@holstorrsceadus1990 , might be owners did work neighbors knew was not up to Code. I worked in a hardware store, and the guys that had been in Electrical for years told me that people would do things in their home on the cheap. A local Fire Department guy said they'd put out a fire at a home that had been added onto and they wired it with lamp cord.
If I was the pregnant woman from the first story, I would just go ask someone else for their seat, if I was given no for an answer. Some of these stories where one person is pestered for a seat makes me think they take place on some tiny buses.
I'm sick of the "I'm a single mom" excuse. What it really means is (A) you're a slut, and/or (B) you're too irresponsible to be allowed to breed and/or (C) you really think that having and using functional genitals makes you "special". Oh, and we USE to call them "unwed mothers" and it was something to be ashamed of, but of course we USE to be ashamed if a family member was in jail, too, now it seems to be a bragging point.
@@davidvanhorn3340 Dude, ever heard of being widowed or abusive relationships? Not all single parents are sluts. Yes, I'm including men here. Until you know WHY they're single, I suggest you don't judge.
Honestly as a woman who was pregnant 3 times and has run into issues of lack of seating many times being patient for a few more minutes until another person offered their seat isn't difficult. I've never asked someone else for a seat, someone is usually generous enough to offer one. And if they don't no biggie.
NO WAY was that too much. What she did in leaving her baby in the car all the time was so irresponsible. I hope she did learn her lesson. Children do get snatched. She should never forget this lesson. I would have flipped out if my husband did that to our children.
While I don't think lecturing strangers about their life choices is really necessary since we don't know their circumstances either (and pregnancy is necessary for upholding our species), the same goes for the pregnant woman who believes she's entitled to anyone's seat while not even asking if OP had their own circumstances. It's one thing to ask for a seat but another to act entitled before even knowing anything and acting like pregnancy means getting her a seat is the highest priority. I'm handicapped too but you don't really see it just going by my outward appearance. (For those in Germany, I have a GdB of 70 out of 100, which is nothing you get super easily or for just anything. Even 50 is sometimes extremely tough to get despite some people deserving it.) While I would give up my seat for people who are worse off, I wouldn't necessarily do so for a pregnant woman unless they seem to be struggling with their pregnancy a lot. And sore feet do not count here since my feet also tend to hurt a lot. It would be great if people in general would just stop assuming they need a seat more unless they're really needing help to even stand or cannot keep their balance due to eye conditions for example. Because no one can know what kind of handicap another person might have that's not necessarily visible on the outside. Or even a momentary weakness like the OP with their sore feet after working a really long day standing for a majority of it. Pregnancy is not an illness and while it can certainly come with a variety of heavy side effects that can be an illness too, just being pregnant by itself doesn't give her any rights or priority over everyone else who also have their pains. I don't think OP was acting entitled since they didn't say they deserved it more or anything nor saying they were a better person but simply that they're not responsible for her pregnancy (which is true but they could have kept that to themself since it doesn't really help the situation nor their argument). It can definitely be considered as rude to blame people for their life choices and lots of people don't have a choice but to take the bus on top. Few people enjoy it. Nevertheless, the entitled person was the pregnant woman since she acted entitled toward a seat. Rudeness doesn't equal entitlement and not wanting to give up their seat doesn't either. While OP's reaction was too fierce, they were not acting entitled but rather just defended their seat from the one actually acting entitled and also being rude in an attempt to force them to give up their seat.
What baffles me is that "the bus was full" and yet, he was to blame for not giving his seat, he, out of 30+ people that COULD ALSO give their seats... Sorry but, he isn't to blame at all, tho I do agree he was rude and savage, but most people kinda don't know how to react in the heat of the moment
I'm with the lady in the first story. Pregnant people can be very entitled and they don't know what you are going through and they just expect you to accommodate them. I've been harassed in the bus and subway for not standing up for pregnant people, just because I "look" healthy and youngish But I have heart issues, a very bad knee and ankle and often get dizzy and nauseous, so yeah if I can snag a seat I do. Once I got yelled out by a mom because I wouldn't let her pregnant daughter sit, I was curled up in the seat with a slight fever and coughing my lungs out every few minutes as I was heading home after seeing the doctor (pre-corona, it was just a very bad cough, which I often get 'cause I had pneumonia as a baby so my lungs aren't particularly strong), and I wasn't even in a reserved seat, but I got yelled at for five minutes straight until I just looked at the lady, put on my head phones and turned my back to her.
Yup, the entitled one is the pregnant lady. She had every right to ask for the seat, but once OP politely declined, the story should have stopped there. But PL HAD TO turn on the waterworks and play the "woe is me" blame game. It is indeed her choice to be a single mom.
So OP was a lady? Couldn't remember. Just want to add, what if OP was pregnant? And just not showing yet? I agree, the pregnant lady was too entitled. She had a right to ask, but not demand. OP deserved their spot and not their fault she's pregnant and got on after OP. Its as if having to be on your feet for 10 hrs and then having to walk after the short bus ride isn't a valid reason to be able to sit. Old man is entitled, too. Not OPs fault he gave in to the pregnant lady and the bus driver had to stop quickly.
I was in ops situation but my head was killing me n my feet were hurting I told sorry before she threatened me n she was poking me hard on my chest than I told her 2 fuck off n well I said fat cows don't need a seat Edit 2 add I was 15 when this happen I'm 21 now
The difference is you have valid reasons to not give up your seat. You have issues standing or stabilising on a moving vehicle. The op in this storys only issue is they are tired and have sore feet. Yes some pregnant women act entitled and if you explained that you were in fact sick and had heart and knee issues then she should have left you alone. But this pregnant woman asked a perfectly health adult to give up their seat. And a decent person would of done so. So they got treated like the cunt they are.
@@Tb-bf5dw just saying, you shouldn’t have to explain that you are sick or have health issues to someone to justify not giving up a seat, that’s private info that not everyone feels okay divulging. In the story OP shouldn’t have to justify either, though what they said is a bit rude, but the old man and pregnant woman calling OP names are clearly rude too, so i feel everyone was a bit of an AH in the story.
When it comes to your childs safety i dont believe there is such a thing as “too far”. That lady put her kid at risk because she was too lazy to bring him with, that’s awful
That second story has me alarmed and infuriated...at the mom who promised to never leave baby in car again, but did so anyway, and when caught, decided to double-down on it. Dad is well within his rights to divorce her and ask for sole custody, because we know she'll do it again. In fact, it may have been better to call the cops on her at that point if he was considering divorce and getting sole custody, considering she doesn't seem to be capable of understanding the dangers, and, in fact, is claiming victimhood herself. We've had a lot of carjackings in my state, some with kids in car. In our state, it is a vehicle code violation, but a judge can raise it to child endangerment, depending on the situation. I'm a parent myself, and I've seen, far too often, parents doing stupid and dangerous things that endanger their kids, yet they get so irate if you point it out, because they don't like being told how to parent.
The second story definitely angered me. I couldn't imagine leaving my daughter in the unlocked car even just to run in the gas station for 1 minute, let alone over 6. Maybe OP did let his wife's freak out go on too long, but that's child neglect at that point. I've seen people run into gas stations to pay for a pump or pick up a pack of smokes with children in the car (maybe 1 minute inside), but over 6 minutes is just gambling. It only takes 30 seconds to a minute to get a child out of a car seat, & even less to hop in and put it in reverse.
I agree with OP in the 1st story. As a young girl, I'd stand up for the elderly and give up my seat, my siblings are I were raised that way. Later as a young working Mom, on my feet all day and with a severe back problem since I was 19, I needed to rest just as much as any pregnant mother, I was also a mother of two and also working without help at home. OP I FULLY SUPPORT YOU in this situation. Now as a grandmother, with heart problems, and major back problems, including surgery, I have a disabled sticker on my Mercedes, 2 door sports coupe, (just love driving with the roof down), I digress. Because of my back and severe sciatica, my Merc is an automatic and I know how to get in and out of her without straining or hurting my back. I always use a walking stick. A couple of months ago I parked in the disabled spot and another woman with a huge SUV type of vehicle was parked next to me.. Boy oh boy did I receive some dirty looks, here in S Africa, we do not have *KAREN AND KEVIN* people, which seems a regular occurrence in the USA, UK and parts Europe I get back to my Merc, only to find a real nasty sticker stuck onto my car. It amazes me how other people even disabled ones can judge another disabled just because of the vehicle a person is driving. Honestly some people do need to serious wakeup call. I earned my vehicles that I drive and hers is close in value to what mine is😡
Second Story: The mother brought it on herself. If she had paid attention and did the normal thing and take the toddler with her, THEN there would be NO NEED for him to do that. Because, a toddler sitting in an unlocked car, by himself? Anyone could've taken him. Proof: THE FATHER DID!!
Sorry fluff but the pregnant woman was guilt tripping the guy before he commented. He was on his feet all day working and was probably looking forward to sitting down. If the woman hadn’t tried guilt tripping OR he hadn’t worked on his feet all day it would be a different kettle of fish… but circumstances matter. I got guilt tripped on a bus the one time by this old woman even through I’m disabled and had crutches. Her opinion was I could have held onto the bars. Yeah, right. Guilt trippers have paid the same as the tripee… they snooze, they lose.
On that second story about the baby, no you did not go too far she did. If somebody seen it and called the cops she would be in jail and that's where she needs to be.
The mother should be charged, and reported to CPS as an unfit parent. There was a case many years ago where a Mom left her 6 yr old son in her running car. A man just out of prison jumped in and drove off while the Mom tried to free her son who was tangled in the seat elt. The guy drove of with the kid hanging outside of the car, and dragged him to his death for several miles before private citizens and cops forced him to stop. He got life without parole. The second incident was a preteen brother and sister were taken from their family's vehicle after Mom went grocery shopping. The 9 yr old son was raped repeatedly by the two felons, while the 6 yr old girl was molested numerous times. They were located and rescued, and their kidnappers/molesters were arrested and later convicted of all charges. Both kids lived but still need extensive support and therapy due to what they endured. That's what can happen when you leave little kid in a car alone while you're shopping.
We have priority seats for elderly and pregnant people in the busses here, as well as a wheelchair spot. If the bus is very full and no elderly or pregnant people are on the bus, you can sit there with no issue. But you are expected to give up those priority seat for elderly and pregnant women when they get on the bus. As for the second story: OP was completely in the right here, but maybe should have ended the stressful situation a little quicker. Or maybe kept their car next to the wife's car during the entire thing. That being said, the wife has no right to be this pissed and entitled when she frequently endangers their small child. If she continues to do this, OP needs to refuse letting her take the kid anywhere without them present the entire time. Possible divorce and/or child services would have to get involved. OP should tell her she's lucky he hasn't gotten law enforcement or child services involved for endangering the kid. She is in no way the victim here.
This doesn’t sound like they had priority seats. She just picked on OP. Funny how no one else on the bus was offering the lady their seat, so no OP wasn’t the only one who shared the opinion that you have to give up your seat to pregnant people.
@@bautistalover I didn't say that the bus in the story had those priority seats. I meant that we don't have that issue on our busses because of those priority seats and the rules around those. Each bus has 8 priority seats for elderly and pregnant people, as well as one spot dedicated to people in a wheelchair. The wheelchair spot actually has a tiered priority. Wheelchairs have top priority for that spot. If no wheelchairs are on the bus, the priority goes to strollers and such. If neither of those are on the bus, anyone else can sit there. I have noticed that if you have a big amount of luggage or luggage that takes up a lot of space, people tend to give you slightly better access to the priority seats (provided that elderly, pregnant, wheelchairs or strollers don't take up the spaces/aren't on the bus). The rules around seating in our busses are catering to those who need it. So issues like these are not really happening here. If the situation took place in our busses, OP would have been expected to give up their seat and that might also have been enforced due to the rules. Unless the priority seats were in use by people that don't have priority for those seats, OP would have to give up their seat. No matter how many hours of walking they had throughout the day. But the pregnant lady would still be expected to be polite about it. It seems the bus OP was on didn't have that priority seating, otherwise this issue would not have existed.
@@BeepBoopBee gotcha. Even in the US for the buses where they have priority seats if they are legit filled the lady would be out of luck. Any non priority seat is based upon the kindness of others.
@@BeepBoopBee unfortunately that doesn't work most of the time. In both my pregnancy's i was offered seats twice and only by elderly people, which i declined. I never asked though. I sometimes ask for my 3 year old as he can't hold on as good as i do and even then almost no one listenes or just grunts at you. It was completely entitled of the woman to act like this and i was raised that as a healthy person you stand up for elderly, pregnant, children or disabled people (not in this order) but my mom made sure i knew to not do so if someone was rude while asking. We also have priority sitting here. Had to stand for 4 hours one time in the train while 8 month pregnant and no one wanted to stand up for me.
Baby in car: if she does it now, when I am assuming the weather is cool temps, what happens when it is summer and the temps are high? She going to leave him in there then? Carjackings, babynapping, he barf and choke on it, he find something within reach to put in his mouth, etc. She's an idiot and the trick he pulled should have shocked her into reality. Instead, she's not accepting any responsibility and instead is blaming the husband. That marriage will end soon and I hope the dad gets custody.
Story 1: Fluff, I disagree qith you entirely, speaking the truth is not wrong. She kept badgering him to get a seat and pointing out valid truths is not shaming someone forgetting pregnant. We all must deal and live with the choices we make. Now if I was asked nicely, I would probably give up my seat but if I refuse then a person must be respectful of that. He declined and she wouldn't accept his answer which is rude.
i agree with you happens to me as well few times a month, not by pregnant womens but by snotty brat teens that they think they own the bus, unless they come acros me, and let me tell you i have put every single brat in shame on the bus, i have also advantage i know 90% off the bus drivers male and female and they know me.
OP just worked a 10 hour shift standing up most of the time, no way am I badgering him on sitting down or not. I also stand for around 8 hours a shift but at least most of the time there are mats to soften the floor. The lady seemed to pick on OP just because they were young? like there cant only be 2 seats on a bus go ask someone else. If they say no then it means no. It doesn't matter their reasons its their choice.
Story #3...I would have called the cops right away, informed them that there were trespassers who had invaded my home without permission, were destroying my property, and endangering multiple lives. THEN I would have started yelling at them.
1st and 4th story: if you are NOT financially stable to have children, do not reproduce. It is not your friends'/family's responsibility to accommodate to your pregnancy/children. I get it, things and life can get pretty crazy, but still you should learn to make do and better the lives of yours and your future/current children instead of constantly beg and guilttrip to get it your way. Idc If this makes me sound like the AH, I know too many people who pull that crap (who are also in my family) and the entire family is suffering for it mentally and emotionally, including their kids.
I actually know the story behind picture you showed with the “do not buy this house before talking to me” sign! The signs lady’s house was built by the same people who built and are trying to sell the house next to them. Apparently they did a horrible job with sign lady’s house and it was a waste of money and sign lady just wanted to warn others.
Yea, I commented that we didn't have enough info to judge. My thoughts were awful neighbors, a dictatorial HOA or problems with the house that weren't being disclosed. Otherwise the sign doesn't make sense. Idk why that one was included when there is likely a solid reason for it.
2nd story I 100% agree. People don't learn (at least most of the time) until it actually happens. hell, you saw that the wife said she'd stop doing it when OP asked/told her to. And did she? Nope. So clearly simply talking to her wouldn't have done anything
I completely agree with OP from the second story. Not only he doesn't need to apologize but I would demand the wife to apologize for risking our child.
Yes, pregnant woman shouldn't demand special treatment but it's so sad to know that people don't have any common courtesy and integrity to willingly offer their seat to ANY one in need like disabled, elderly and yes even pregnant women. Then people like you complain, "why are people so ugly and self centered? " 🙄
@@Orchid11nx do you live up to your own standards? or are you like all the other people on the bus who simply sat around and judged op for not giving up their seat when any of them could've easily given up theirs? i'm sure plenty of people live up to your standards but good deeds and "common courtesy" don't make good stories so why would we ever hear about any of that? call me ugly, call me self centered but i'm of the belief you shouldn't have to inconvenience yourself for the convenience of another person and the expectation of doing so (that someone is always more deserving of something for x reason), especially when it's put specifically on the young, is an exceedingly toxic mindset.
This current generation are so entitled and don't know how to show kindness to their fellow humans. I have a code I live by and I practice it every time I go outside. I see someone with only a couple of items or workers on break and I have a large amount of items I always let them go ahead of me. I have MS and have trouble standing for too long and require a cane, yet I am more than willing to give my seat up to someone who really needs it. I have zero tolerance for self entitled people like the Op Karen. I will never give my seat up to someone like her, I would to the pregnant woman and would make sure she would get to the seat before the entitled and selfish Karen Op. It wouldn't be petty nor revenge just making sure someone who is more disserving get the seat. I can think of at least four incidents where this type of thing has happened and I practice what I preach.
Honestly anyone could have a reason to not be be able to give their seat up. I agree with op as my job is also on my feet and is very taxing so I get it 100%. I hate public transport but if I had to take it and give my seat up I'd not be happy. And also the bus is full, meaning there's plenty of people who could have given their seat up
Story #2: OP was in the right. He was teaching his wife a big lesson! NEVER LEAVE YOUR BABY IN THE CAR... PERIOD! No matter if the town/city is safe, never leave the baby in the car OR even leave your car UNLOCK! His wife was just asking to get robbed, and for the baby to be kidnapped.
Not only that. It's extremely dangerous to leave your car unlocked. Anyone could sneak into your car. Possibly hide in the trunk. Since some people don't check the back seat or trunk regularly. Both of them could be gone.
@@holstorrsceadus1990 I get what you're saying but everyone has a story. If there wasn't room, then some else could have given up their seat. I mean, what are the chances all the seats were taken by elderly or pregnant people? I know what it's like to be on your feet for so long that you just can't stand anymore. Look at Rosa Parks. She was tired and didn't move from her seat.
The first story, no you don't have to give up your seat. No one needs to get angry at you, because you are sitting at the front of the full bus, other people could give up their seats for this lady.
First post, I don’t think OP is TA because generally when people are exhausted, they are generally pretty cranky. Yes I don’t agree with what OP said, but why was he only singled out when she could have asked literally anyone else?
Taking his kid for the car when left alone is NOT going too far! She lied and was leaving their child alone in the car that is not only illegal it is so fucking dumb, there is stories all the time of children taken from cars, if you are the parent then you have the responsibility. She has no right to be angry, how would she feel if the child taken!
No, he didn't go far enough with grabbing the baby from the car!!! Leaving kiddo alone for over 6 minutes?!? It gives me heartburn just thinking about it
Actually, here in Mexico there are reserved seats for pregnant women and elderly and people can sit in them but if either a pregnant woman or an older dude comes, you have to give your seat, it is mandatory!!...
1:51 in the U.S., it costs an average of $100,000 to raise a child from 0-18. A high end car costs around $30,000. Yeah, she shoulda thought that one through.
With our first son, my [ex] wife would turn away from our son in the shopping 🛒... so one day at Kmart I took our baby son out of the cart while she had her back turned! Needless to say, she freaked out and when the panicking set in, I brought our son out from our hiding place. She tried to get mad at me. I told her it was her fault for not watching our son. I told her I'd been watching her talking to the store manager for 5 minutes before she even noticed that our son was gone!
Story 2, the father was RIGHT to do what he did. While she’s in the store someone driving could have hit the car with the baby in it. No matter where you park, something can happen & no one would see anything. Her momentary horror was that & she was lucky.
The guy who took his child out of his wife's car to give her a little shock and awe should get a commendation medal for showing his wife what could happen and how it feels. What she is doing is a criminal offense. I she doesn't stop I would separate and the the child with me. She is endangering the life of a PERSON!
NO! OP in the second story did NOT go too far. His wife not only should apologize to him, she should thank him for not getting CPS and police involved.
First story no he isn't an ahole. I work alot to barely keep me and my sick wife afloat. Heck I was sitting on yhe benches outside my work getting through a 15hr shift when a pregnant woman stands next to me on her phone complaining she can't find a place to sit glaring at me like I'm expected to move Second my older sister almost got snatched from a car 2yrs old. Plus I live in a Karen state. Ppl break windows for pets too
Sick of the entitlement single parents claim. Lost my job of 10 years ,when the company had to downsize, to a coworker who had only been there 2 years "cause she's a single parent and you don't have kids " didn't matter I had more experience
Story 4: Using children to convince someone to give money and then use the money for random unreleased stuff? And then continue to use the children for emotion blackmail? Wow, that's foul
The guy with the baby did not go too far, that mom is asking someone to kidnap her child and she’s acting like she did nothing wrong, she’s knowingly putting her child in danger on a regular basis, it’s as simple as that
Speaking as someone who raised/cared for 13 children in her lifetime, NOT ONCE did I ever leave ANY of them in a vehicle! Not even under the care of the older children(never thought that was fair, making them responsible for other children when they themselves were children). I can honestly say that the father in the second story should have let his wife call the cops and, when they arrived, joined in on the conversation to make them aware of what's been going on. Getting them involved just might have been the kick in the pants his wife needed.
Story 1: Can totally relate, as should the mother to be. OP explained his reason and she could have asked someone else. Unless it's priority seating, he had no obligation.
@clown rat Lol. Yeh, maybe his comment could've been kept to himself, but then we all react differently, especially after a hard day's work. Family could've been a bit more understanding!
@@mospeada1152 Yeah. Maybe it’s the way I was raised but purposefully ignoring a pregnant woman asking for a seat is rude in my eyes. I have severe scoliosis pain when I stand for too long but even I would’ve offered a seat. Definitely not the asshole for getting pissed when the lady got rude, but a bit of an ass for how it was handled.
@@clownrat5759 honestly that’s what I think too, OP could have said what he said differently, but since we are human, we are not perfect, that being said he did work an 10 hour shift and was possibly cranky for not only suffering but also for being exhausted
@@lugismansion2400 hey if someone wants to throw a pity party for being a single parent they deserve everything they get. She was being manipulative when she brought that up.
Wtf? No way that father went too far. If he had just taken off without telling his wife that he had the baby, THAT would be too far. But that's a lesson that damn sure needed to be learned before something legit bad happened.
Child left in car: OP absolutely did not go too far. He was right! He proved that anyone could have come by in the over 6 minutes she was in the gas station (it was 6 minutes AFTER he showed up, so God knows how long she was in there before OP showed up!) and taken the child out of her UNLOCKED car never to be seen again. If she were a rational human being, if she was indeed a loving mother, she would have acknowledged her mistake. But she's acting like she did nothing wrong. It almost seems like she is inviting someone to steal her baby. And let me ask OP: do you live in a state where the temperatures get extreme (very hot/cold)? Because a baby left in a car for any length of time in extreme temperatures can become seriously ill or die.
As a social worker I would have called CPS and had the child removed. This is so dangerous to do to a child and the consequences could have been deadly. Better a scare by the father than a truly tragic happening.
I agree with OP in the second story taking his child out of the car. He waited for his wife to come out and prevented her from calling 911. She was in the wrong and should have been the one to apologize. This was a lesson that she needed to learn.
1st story comment. As someone who has major issues with their feet. NO, OP is not the AHole. However, I do empathize with the mom-to-be. It's a catch-22. Dam'd if you do, dam'd if you don't scenario. Edit 1: 2nd story. Oh he!! NO! You NEVER leave kids (or furbabies) in a car unattended EVER!)
2nd Story, OP was not going too far. That's a whole baby. The car was unlocked. Yes he could've sat there and just watched the car for her or even sat with the baby to chew her out when she came back but if talking to her before didn't work then he moved to the next thing. She should be thankful it was him and not a predator. I know it's better to be scared straight than lose that kid forever and on top of that have to explain to your husband that you didn't listen to him and got your child kidnapped with your negligence. She doesn't doesn't deserve an apology. He leveled with her and made a point. She should apologize for not taking him seriously.
