This is beautiful, haunting and moving. People often thing because others are beautiful, life is great and that is often so far from the truth. Beauty attracts the worst predators.
It takes courage to share what she did. No one is in a position to judge her unless they go through exactly the same as she did since early childhood - which is impossible. What I saw is a beautiful transformation process. I appreciate the lessons learned she was willing to share.
The message at the end really ought to be taught in schools, especially to women but also to men. Learning to love, value and make choices of self care ought to be part of education.
Good catch! The message at the end is the real point of this talk, and it's been overlooked and overshadowed by unqualified judgements against the messenger. Thank you, Ms. Otis, for sharing a piece of Truth with us.
I have caught interviews through the years of Otis and this is even more real and heartfelt than the others. A complex and sensitive being that has the courage to stand up and reveal her story. Anyone that can find the negative in that intention wouldn't be able to see the beauty anyways. But this transformed Otis could care less of those types and that's what's amazing- so happy for her!
Used to not like her but after watching this I was mistaken. Im sorry Carre for judging you when I didn't even know you and what you went through. Peace to you.
You are wonderful. Thank you so much for this amazing, raw and real Ted Talk. Your vulnerability really spoke to my heart. You spoke for women all over the world with the truth of your story and the spiritual place you spoke of being possible. Thank you for being so real and beautiful. As a woman I felt every part of your story and the great joy ypu have found. Thank ypu for the encouragement.
Wow!!Touching, inspiring and thought provoking at so many levels. I will never think of that movie in the same way again! Just comes to show how the reality of what we see with our own eyes and what's going on at a deeper level can be as different as night and day. Thank you Carrie for being brave enough to be vulnerable and share your story.
It is very strange to hear her talk like that because for me "Wild Orchid" is a true masterpiece touching the soul much more than the body. I guess then that creating masterpieces like that takes human sacrifices, don't know what else to say.
I don't think it is logical to compare struggles. There are peoples who have very little, yet they are happy. They can derive pleasure from little things in life and this is true even if it could be hard to believe. I respect Carre otis's struggles, as one can see and hear, she is a human being speaking from her soul. There is nothing fake in everything she said, it was all genuine.
a beautiful authentic sharing, thank you carre, wise words for us all to follow, self love if we can achieve it in life, is the biggest gift, then to share that with others is icing on the cake... congratulations for achieving that position.
Young women need to have family and friends they trust to protect them, live with them and travel with them if they enter into the modeling or film industry. She was 17 years old. We over estimate the ability of young women (and boys) to protect themselves from aggressive, bad intentioned adults.
Kudos for Carré to stand up and talk. If she was asked whose hand was on the trigger that shot the bullet it may actually reveal a different perspective to whether she was a victim!
Unbelievable! Thank you for your courage to say something about what you've gone through. I watched Wild Orchid years ago and didn't realize the complications it brought to your life. I will never see it again in the same light.
What a BEAUTIFUL human being!!! Thank you for sharing your story. It must have been very hard. Very disappointing about the Wild Orchid movie and the Hollywood industry in general. Glad to see women finally reclaiming themselves around the world. You are an inspiration! Best wishes to you and your family.
Thank you for sharing, no way it's easy to start loving yourself when you grow up without that kind of understanding of thing as such. I see it everyday. I am sure there are people who were need hear this. So glad you found man who help you reunite with yourself. :)
I could sense a fragility in the movie Wild Orchid... I canot stand the crooked mind and behavior in once scene wich does not value a spiritual lady... This agent in Paris is a monster... This message is full of dignity and spirituality. Glad to know you are fulfilled and live in harmony... How mothers raise kids is the key !
Carre, that was powerful, your triumph through your journey was proof there is Love divine, thank you for sharing your story. May God continue to bless you as you continue to bless others. I am truly moved.
I have no sympathy for post sexual regrets. Money blinded this woman, and she now realizes she had her priorities wrong, but this is not a sad story. This is a story of a woman growing up.
It was her low self-esteem that made her a star(yes, and her motivation). People with power like to shape raw flesh with low resistance. She is not healed, she is just a product of this whatever asymmetric cycle, that she can not escape.
Thank you for sharing your story with such honesty and vulnerability. I am so very happy to discover your talk. It is inspiring to see how you transcended all the pain and darkness into the power of self-knowledge and realization.
I watched " Wild Orchid" when it came out! You were just so Beautiful! But I never knew what was going on in your Life! So sorry you went thru so much. So grateful you are very happy now! You deserve it!
she talks about abusive marriage and sexual abuse, but she is not being honest to talk about her drug problem. She was a heroin addict. That also contributed to her problem.
She came from a dysfunctional family. Using drugs is another part of dysfunction. She was a young girl in an industry that uses up and spits out young women. Which came first, her addiction or her abuse? Does it matter? She was discussing reclaiming her love for herself. That was the point. Leaving something out is not dishonest. She didn't mentioni she was married to Rourke. Was that dishonest? She had a short talk and chose what to emphasize. Love yourself. Have your own back and the rest will follow.
Even IF you have a good sense of self, and are very able to defend yourself, and good in "delineating"- I can promise there will still be guys who'll never stop to try to molest you sexually. I never had that happen to me, but I sure had to fight to stand my ground. And that shouldn't have to be the case at all. It happens to SO many women, and the older you get, the more you learn how big in scale a problem this is.
Wow.....the beauty inside and the essence of Carre......the true test of a woman who has it all and has to find this for herself........the story of how beauty as a place of union and sacred feminine source is so needed in this world of illusion that decries the magic of being real........deep respect and gratitude for her sharing and her life........blessings and love.....
Pop Rock Men are victims as well. Many don't think they have a right to complain or speak out. The suffering is the same. This is a human story above all.
Shame. Mickey adored her, picked her for that role, married her, fought for her while she was high on drugs. She didn't have a gut to turn him down before he sacrificed so much for her and now she is pointing her unpolished finger at him blaming for abuse. What a shame! I wish she never went to casting for that f***ing Wild Orchid to save him so much heartbreak and disappointment.
so basically, it's always someone else to blame for her tragedies, as if she had no responsibility ever, or no possibility to say no. That's not a good advice for people, especially young women
I'm very happy for you to found yourself and love her💖 that is the path everyone is walking. Some of us get lost some found the way within.. Great love from me to you brave women 🙏
Thank you, i've come along way in the past months, i actually do love myself these days for the first time in my life or at least have stopped disliking my self. Required a lot of dedicated effort to grow and start healing. cheers*
Finding the comments more inspired than this Ted talk itself. The comments by yowzee, however harsh, pose some interesting discussion questions. For example, as a college freshman, coming from a similar-sounding home as Ms. Otis, I began dancing in a strip club in NYC. At 17 years-old, I felt fully capable of making that decision, rationalized it within my teenage mind as a "less time-intensive pursuit" to earn living money, while taking an 18-credit Pre Med course-load and I went for it. As a 36-year old woman, looking back, I wouldn't consider myself a victim, per se, but I think this question deserves consideration: when does a person become an adult? I don't have the answer, but I can say, without a doubt, that it is not at the age of 18. Everyone is different, I can look upon those years swingin' round the pole as empowering and quite the social experiment! At any rate, the role of "victim" is a self-perpetuating wasteland. A victim has no control over the forces "victimizing" her. It's a place devoid of power-keeps us stuck. A helpful book w/ an embarrassing title confronted my "victim" mentality many moons ago and I've never looked back. Remember, the title is humiliating, ("Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting") The author confronted my self-pity in such a way that I blushed-as though she were admonishing me in front of an auditorium filled with people-but I was alone, reading in bed. Shitty things happen to better people than us. Taking responsibility for our role in them and moving forward is how to have a meaningful life...OR, one can dwell every minute of every day upon something which cannot be changed because it happened in the past. Your choice. Interesting comments.
Thank you! I just noticed a little red bell icon-suppose I ought to sort out my settings. I'm so pleased you took the time 2 share your reaction! Cheers! Ang
Angela Olsen as you say, everyone is different. people with low self-esteem are a lot more prone to letting things happen to them because they are not sure enough of themselves to say no. they are easily convinced that what they are doing is exactly what is normal and disagreeing would mean you are being ungrateful. i disagree with this mentality of blaming the victim. telling someone who was raped by the person who was supposed to take care of her that they WEREN'T a victim is disingenuous. i get not living in that mentality forever. but not dealing with it, or saying that it was her fault is just plain wrong, and also dangerous, given the culture we live in loves to slut shame and victim blame.
There is nothing to add to what Otis says herself. A child who come from an dysfunctional family. As the song says: Born in a dead man's town The first kick I was hit when I hit the ground You're up too much Till you spend your life just covering up .... It was a war, she won! The parents started the hostilities, the predators followed. It takes a lot of perseverance and strength to get out.
I like you carre, I have your book! I'm sorry for everything that happened to you! I loved that film wild orchid not realising what really happened behind the scene! Mickey was mentally abusive towards you, unfortunately he had an abusive childhood! He was just as messed up as you were! Mickey tells a different side to the story! but always you've both sorted yourselfs out :)
wow, you go, Carre. I knew that film, Wild Orchid, was weird...off. That Mickey Rourke/svengali bullshit. I'm so glad she's found the road back to healing and healthy. Very inspirational.
