People pleasers like to listen to others too much. And then we end up in situations that are not beneficial for us. Relationships are very personal choices. When I got married, the judge told me to never let others including my own family talk into my marriage. Nobody knows you as well as you do.
This applies to jobs as well. When it’s time to go have a plan for the next thing and don’t look back. Thanks Clay for your awesome videos. I feel like you get in my head and articulate what I feel. This is a great place for INFJs to be reminded we are not alone and others get them.
This is so soooo true. That puzzle analogy is Ni at work! This doesn't only apply to our relationships, it also the reason people are always questioning INFJs "logic" in some of the decisions they make about (you name it!)...I believe it's becuase they just can't "see" all of the factors that went into those decisions. Those factors are too numerous to convey in words, but they're there! This is a common and classic problem for INFJs (and maybe INTJs too because of their dominant Ni?) I feel like I have spent way too much time attempting to justify my conclusions to others...to convey the logic of them (which IS there, it's just that it's too complex to easily convey) that I've "adjusted" my strategy significantly. I now take a step back...get a grasp on where, exactly, they're coming from...acknowledge and validate their perspective and that it's logical perspective considering the factors they've included....and then choose my words wisely so as not to get into even trying to show them all of the factors "I" am including...I've noticed it's usually impossible and a waste of time and can even frustrate them further when they're not able to follow.
Thank you, Clay! So true. You never know what is going on in that 90%, and nobody knows your relationship's 90%. And projection is real. People's reactions are more about their own fears, traumas.
Thank you for this golden nugget > Right now, I’ve been focusing on building a good relationship w. myself. I finally got started .. > Beat Wishes 2 you
Hi Clay. I am an INFJ in a relationship with a narcissist. I am hoping you can create a video on how to walk away in a relationship in such situation? I remember you mentioned it happened to you in the past, so you must know how hard it is. Thank you and more power to your channel.
@@stefanleu4278 we don’t all know that good and evil things exist. You assume we know that. For example, if a lion eats a gazelle, I’m sure it seems pretty evil to the gazelle. But to the lion, it is not. I personally think humans define good and evil based on what is best for our species, just like every other species does. Good and evil is simple rules for survival coded into our DNA. It would be pretty rare to find something that was ‘good’ that also was a negative to a human being’s survival.
