In my kindergarten art class, sunlight dripped through fingerpaint-covered windows. I learnt the primaries: red, blue, yellow. I could make the whole rainbow out of three colours. I was older when I started telling myself that I only looked at the female anatomical models for reference. I had so much experience dressing quickly and keeping my eyes on the ground in the locker room, but this girl made me understand why they say “pretty as a painting”. You can’t touch museum art. We have the same lotion. It smells better on her, it makes me think of cookies and old Paris cafés where the great painters had lunch. The colour palette I bring from home is so dark, but she makes me lean towards romantiscism. I can’t draw a straight line anymore but it’s okay; her hair is naturally curly. A boy called her weird yesterday, and I wanted to tell her that I have spent hours practicing shading to recreate the light in her eyes, but that would make it obvious I’d been staring. You’re not supposed to look at your friends like that. Our teacher says the colourmaker Diesbach tried to make a perfect red and created ultramarine. In a time when ultramarine paint was worth more than gold he added animal blood to his flask and out burst blue, worth more than gold! I wanted vermilion like Romeo, ruby as sunset, flash lipstick, scarlet forget-me-not kisses, I would give blood to my brush for her to blush at me in that shade I would take cobalt as a new sky, azure as cornflower, schoolgirl skirt navy hiding held hands or even yellow sunflower petals. Dutch painters whispering “she loves me… she loves me… she loves me…” Our teacher didn’t tell us that the creation of prussian blue led to the isolation of cyanide. I can’t breathe without [???] the poison, it’s apple seeds and seeping through junior-high gym floorboards when you watch your best friend dance with boys who will never be you! I always liked friendship bracelets more than promise rings. My middle-school diaries are filled with girls, like a pick-pocket sketching the Hope Diamond. I’d be lining my [???] with stolen glances. I don’t have a partner in crime to keep me warm. I know the signs. The teacher’s assistant, a nice junior who comes to school with cherry eyes every time her lab partner gets a new boyfriend. Throw over your men! My history professor and her roommate of 15 years. I say someone in another time will remember us. I want to be five years old mixing all the colours until i get the drark brown of her Monet shoulder freckles, and you give a Valentine to everyone in class.
The one thing i loved most about this entire poem is all of the support she recieved from the audience. By the end of the poem she was calm and that is because of all the "come on"'s, the audience shouted for her. Plus the comment at the beginning, "come on, poet, remember why you wrote it." Beautiful.
She starts off so soft and innocent sounding, almost childlike. And as she progresses you can hear the maturity and pain. And lord I just can't get over it. Gives me chills every time.
I never thought that someone could speak the thoughts that echo in my brain but here it is... "You're not supposed to look at your friends like that" that sentence hit me hard; and so did this whole poem
+SweetRubes The other one that hit just as hard for me of not harder was "When you watch your best friends dance with boys who will never be you" This whole poem was hard hitting and beautiful
Freshman year of high school, I fell in love with a girl who considered me her best friend. Her boyfriend liked me, he thought I was funny. She is an artist. She paints all the time. She has natural curly hair. No words can explain how hard this poem hit me.
"I say someone in another time will remember us" - Sappho. I've listened to this poem so many times for so many years and it just hit me. You're a genius, Rhiannon
This is the one slam poem that can really get to me no matter how many times I hear it. "I can't draw a straight line anymore but that's okay, her hair is naturally curly."
Damn if only this girl knew. She truly loved and love till it hurt. I personally don’t believe when people say they love me or are in love with me but if they ever wrote me something like this I would cry and believe it. I envie the girl she wrote this for ❤️
I absolutely adore this poem. I love how she's so nervous at the beginning, it really feels like she's in love with whoever this poem is about. Even if her nervousness is really just stage fright, I think she's behaving exactly like I do when I'm in love and I really like her performance. Thanks Rhiannon
I always thought poetry was for people who thought deeply into things and could right amazing poems I cannot write poems at all (not that I know of) Listening to her and the others like in "Somewhere in America" I actually started to cry and realized my love for poetry I listened to others and I cannot satisfy my thirst for true poetry at its finest The amount of thought that must go into every word is amazing I'd love to be able to write such a powerful poem that it brings people to tears
I didn't think I'd find anyone who understood so well, but here it is, spoken in colors that I see every day, a feeling of connection as I cry while I listen to your voice tip towards tears.
this poem finds me every couple years. its one of the ones i remember the most. how i have changed so much, yet her words stay the same. but the meaning and how they hit me change. i hope she has found beautiful love.
This was wonderfully raw, and I know exactly what that's like, Rhiannon, because that all happened to me, too. I know I'm not alone, but it's always nice to have a reminder. Thank you. It means a lot. :)
I feel this and relate to this on an emotion level I can not even imagine. She is a marvelous poet and this had to be my favorite as I'm an artist and having the same experience (except in Highschool )
everytime i need to ground myself, i take myself back here. seeing rhiannon's passion and emotion run free and watching her stand her ground just inspires me to be just as free and passionate in my craft one day. not only that but never before has something so accurately captured that immense overwhelming realisation as a young gay person finding their way in life that your heart knows others more than your brain knows itself
So beautiful! I always get chills (I've watched this video and read the transcript so many times that I just have lost count). I love it as a whole, but some specific lines gave me an idea for a little shortfilm. I wish I could have permission to develop it further than just the idea of it.
It's been two years since the first time I watched this, but I cry almost every time I see this again. This poem has touched me so much, given me so much hope and love. Rhiannon McGavin, thank you for this poem. Its words and themes are so beautiful.
I can’t tell you how hard this hits home. Falling in love with girl friends who will never love you, but constantly drawing portrait after portrait because she’s so beautiful.
everytime im drunk at home i end up coming back to this poem. Makes me feel like sandra cisneros said, like I'm still 16 somewhere within the current version of myself - what a special work
Favorite line I practice hours of shading trying to recreate the light in your eyes I see 2 meanings 1. The girl she’s shading for is depressed and she want to put light back in them 2 the girl has such beautiful light in her eyes and Ann knows she can’t try and make it herself
