Riverdale: The Show That Went Completely Insane 

Hello Friends. Well it’s another weird video. You might notice I like to make these a lot, I don’t really enjoy sticking to one specific area, as much as I do just talk about whatever interests me at the time, and the reason im able to do that is cause I don’t need to worry about youtube algorithm nonsense (or copyright, this video was hit with three different content ids before it even went live) and thats thanks to the support I get from my patrons. So if you want to help ensure I can just.. I guess keep this channel weird, you can do so here: www.patreon.com/Supereyepatchwolf Also if Patreon isn’t your thing, I also have a Ko Fi now: ko-fi.com/supereyepatchwolf#achievementUnlockedModal But hey. Either way, really appreciate you watching the video and just following me in general, have a good one.

This show's plot is so bizarre I'm surprised that Archie and Jughead haven't crossed the Egyptian desert to fight a british vampire and his time-stopping punch ghost in downtown Cairo.

Riverdale is what happens when a fanfic writer gets control of his favorite show and can now see his darkest, silliest fantasies brought to life. That is literally what has happened.

Betty becoming an fbi officer after like 90% of her close male relatives turned out to be serial killers and her mother married the head of an organ-harvesting cult seems to be the most sensible thing that happened towards the end there.

I’m sorry but _“if there’s no wedding reception it means the gargoyle king has won.”_ is one of the greatest slices of dialog I’ve ever heard in my life. Holy shit.

The best description of Riverdale I ever heard was from a friend of mine. "Watching an episode of Riverdale makes you feel like you must have missed an episode of Riverdale."

It would be hilarious if it turns out Riverdale was just a very long revenge plan made by the director because his gay Archie stageplay got shot down.

This feels like an improv skit but nobody ever stops any crazy ideas from passing forward.

Riverdale feels like youre watching a Highschool musical marathon but someone sits on the remote and it switches to supernatural at increasing intervals

Fun fact in interviews, the cast revealed Jughead was actually supposed to be there at the S3 cliffhanger where they burn their clothes, but it was a really cold night and Cole refused to leave his trailer half naked to film the scene. The entire implication of Jughead's death and what became the driving plot of season 4, ONLY EXISTS BECAUSE COLE REFUSED TO LEAVE HIS TRAILER.

This is a totally biased review against Riverdale, because Eyepatchwolf hasnt known the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of high school football.

I watched season one when it first aired and didn't bother with the rest until years later. When I picked back up with season two, I remember being unsure whether or not Reggie had been recast so I went to the wiki to find out. I was greeted with "Status: Deceased (dragged to Hell)" I caught all the way up in the next two weeks

Hey, just point out that the shut down of "the gay Archie play" didn't happen because Archie was being depicted as gay, rather because the character that was his love interesting in the play wasn't a fiction character, he was a real murder, Nathan Leopold

Idk why, but the line “We have to burn all our clothes, including Jughead’s beanie” fucking killed me

The fact that this show was based off a goofy, lighthearted 60s comic series fucking baffles me

This will get ignored as it's 1 year too late, but my friend worked on this set as background and a wrangler of background extras, and he said the entire acting crew (who he met, talked to and hungout with between takes) hated working on this show. They would continually go to overtime hours because the writes (based out of LA) would send the revised scripts at 4pm with new lines and new plot points that the actors would have to memorize and then perform. Many long hours, frustrating moments and just general shit treatment of the crew. Vancouver produces almost every CW show and they are notorious in the film industry for being the absolute worst. CW writers and execs simply are bad at their jobs and in a field that operates tens or even hundreds of crew members daily (makeup, set design, costume design, extras, film crew, lighting crew, directors, script sueprvisor and the actors and director), paying even one day of overtime accounts for thousands or tens of thousands of extra pay. So the crew were compensated, but fuck, they really were treated like shit. Just look up any interview with the cast and crew regarding the show and you can see their dislike for the show, but they're young actors working on a popular show and getting paid well so why quit? It just sucks for all involved that the CW cannot seem to make good shows or even treat their crew well.

Don't forget the part where Hiram Lodge put a bomb in Archie's bed, and blew him up so hard that it created an alternate universe where riverdale has a slightly different name and magic is real

A lot of these writing decisions feel like they come from a place of "we're definitely getting cancelled this season, so lets just come up with whatever we feel like and roll with it."

God, I love how this show really went "well, the high school drama didn't work out. Time for 'Tommy wiseau's Twin peaks'"

I asked my mum what riverdale was like since she watched some seasons of it, she described it perfectly “every episode from riverdale you watch makes you feel like you’re watching a new show every time”

The fact that he didnt even mention the episode where an escaped convict tries to kill veronica and its never mentioned again is astounding lol

If Riverdale doesn't end with Archie waking up from a coma after being shot during the robbery at the dinner, I riot.

Riverdale: a show written by people who are determined to see what they can get away with.

As of February 2023, Wikipedia describes Riverdale as a “supernatural horror crime drama television series”. I don’t think I’ve heard anything be described like that before!

As far as I can tell, what happened here is that the showwriters discovered that they could only make so many reasonable things happen in a teenage drama show, so after like 10 episodes they just said "screw it" and made it go insane instead, so that way it'd be interesting. At least now they've hit "so-bad-it's-good" territory, that's a plus.

"If there's no wedding reception, it means the gargoyle king has won." hwhut

I swear to God, your ability to take something as innocuous as Riverdales shitty writting and lack of direction and somehow tie it back to wrestling is wild.

"Rather than something succeed in mediocrity, I'd rather see it fail, spectactularly". What a line

"Oh Archie, you haven't even been mauled by a bear yet" is my favorite line ever 😂

At this point I'm convinced the CW is using Riverdale as a way to launder money.

In all fairness, the evil billionaire escaping from the law in his personal spaceship is probably the most plausible twist nowadays.

I once read a fanfiction that was written by a group of writers, where each writer would read the section immediately before theirs and write their own section based only on that. Despite it being a relatively short, one-chapter fanfiction, it still managed to lose the entire basis of the plot halfway through, and was constantly dropping plot threads and creating new ones, resulting in an extremely confusing (if well-written, no shade to the authors) mess of a story. A character who was freezing to death at one point had a stomach wound instead a few paragraphs later, and a character who was initially missing (the injured character was searching for him) suddenly showed up to the rescue with no explanation or fanfare. I have to imagine that the writing process for Riverdale is somewhat similar to that fanfiction

Also I actually love the first season of Riverdale because the stage fright plot is played at the exact same level of drama as the LITERAL MURDER and that tickles me. The overdramatic EVERYTHING is what I lived for in that season. Plus the murder mystery is actually quite well written and fun. I sort of consider season 1 to be basically a different show from the rest, and I love both for different reasons.

"For I am Cheryl Blossom, QUEEN OF THE BEES!" with the show slowly ascending into madness on the graph finally broke me. I have tears in my eyes, holy shit.

The comedic timing of the second teacher, jumping out the same window, is absolutely immaculate.

this is like if the SCP foundation only did like 3/4ths of their job

The funniest part is that there is no reason for this show to be based on characters from Archie Comics.

My roommate worked on the earlier seasons of Riverdale; he was in the makeup department. Can confirm the writers didn't know what they were doing. As an MUA you get the script so you can plan and/or understand the makeup in context to do it right, depending on your job. My roommate said that he'd get a script, and by the day of the shooting it was completely changed. They'd change things day-of, rushed to write or edit things, and almost everyone behind the scenes were confused and thought it was stupid lol. He said it was fun to work on, because it was ridiculous, but nearly everyone was very aware that it was ridiculous.

11:50 honestly props to cole sprouse because by some miracle of sheer acting prowess his line delivery in this scene makes it kind of bearable actually

Recently started watching this for the first time with my roommates. One of them has seen it before, the other refuses to watch every episode and will skip sometimes 7 whole episodes at a time. The three of us are all getting roughly the same experience. We have all agreed that this show was written by an AI.

Hal's actor said he didn't know or even suspect he was the Black Hood until the day they filmed his reveal. They had Z E R O plans and I love it so much.

"I'm sorry jughead, I can't help you" *dives through window* I don't think I'm meant to laugh at it but it's the funniest shit I've ever seen

All the "but OH NO" moments in your narration in this video was hilarious

As of the writing of this comment, Riverdale is now concluded. I hereby formally submit a request for a followup video.

Imagine trying to deliver this line with a straight face: “If there’s no wedding reception, it means the Gargoyle King has won”

At this point, the only believable way they could end this series would be by breaking the fourth wall, and having the cast realise they're characters in a tv show.

The funniest part of the scene where Edgar evernever is introduced is how, moments before, it's this serious moment where the the gang is singing "can't we be Seventeen" and they get really into it, and the parents all give each other concerned looks as if to say to each other "wow these are just kids and they're getting so fucked up and we're causing a lot of their trauma, shit" and it feels like maybe the story is trying to point out the toll on the characters that all this crazy crap is taking, and acknowledge like, yeah these kids HAVE been acting crazy, this is not the ideal and they need to address it. And then a beat passes and then evel kneival Manson steps up to totally derail that and just throw the characters and show into further insanity without ever looking back. That said, I am so grateful to Chad michael Murray for his shenanigans and being the cause of the line "he didn't buy a rocket. He built one"

Lili Reinhart, bless her soul, has said in an interview that the flash forward scene in Season 4 (?) of the three of them naked and covered in Jughead's blood was completely made up without any idea of what the context was. It was originally supposed to be the 4 of them, but Cole Sprouse didn't want to do it bc it was cold or something so it was just the 3 of them. So basically they had to write a whole season plot around the fact that Cole didn't want to stand outside in the cold.

I reckon Archie's dad did die in a normal robbery and then everything from that point onwards is just Archie going insane and hallucinating

I have never seen Riverdale but going based off this video it's feel like a never ending "yes and-" scene and I love that. Just complete chaos

My mom is a big fan of the Archie comics ever since they first came out and knows the characters like the back of her hand. She understands that the show is supposed to be a different take on the story and characters she loves. But when she finally watched the show even she was confused and lost about what was going on

"how is the gargoyle king 4 different people?" their stacked on top of each other and take turns being on top. thats why hes so tall.

In a high school class, I took a creative writing class. One of the exercises was that someone had to write a story for a few minutes, then pass it to the next person, and so on. It was fun, but it created entire stories that were messy. Stories were set up, big moments were created because people were randomly making stuff up under the pressure, often with little set up. I can only assume Riverdale is written in the same way

Luke Perry was in the show but unfortunately passed. His son Jack is now a wrestler in AEW. Luke used to go to all of Jack's matches and Jack was going to be doing a show by me but 2 weeks before the show happened, Luke passed. I was certain I would meet Luke since he would regularly sit in the crowd. I have met Jack but Luke was a legend. 8 seconds is such an underrated movie.

Be gone from my temple, or I will smite thee, for I AM CHERYL BLOSSOM, QUEEEN OF THE BEEEEES 🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝

The fact that Jughead actually ran after the second teacher like 'Not this shit again!' is what got me, oh my god

"we have to burn all our clothes, including jughead's beanie" i like that she felt the need to clarify that this does, in fact, include jughead's beanie. in case it wasn't clear otherwise.

You can't talk about the Archie comics without mentioning the Archie x Punisher crossover! Yes, this is a real thing that really happened. We are in the best timeline

0:02 - "One attendee of Riverdale High is discovered to be a grown woman pretending to be a high school student." Erm... Isn't that the entire show?

Archie 100% got shot in the robbery and the rest of the show is his brain dreaming while he's recovering in a medically induced coma while he recovers. I hope the show ends with him waking up, but something equally bat shit happens right before credits roll

I never thought I’d hear the sentence “There is a second cult simultaneously taking over the town” outside Welcome to Night Vale.

Thank God someone who understands that you can enjoy a piece of media without it making sense or being "good". Sometimes I just like to be entertained!!

I watched maybe four or five seasons because my young son was into it (I hated it the entire time but I love my son and spending time with him) and can we just also acknowledge that the prison is named SHANKSHAW. SHANK SHAW! 🙄🙄🙄 I was going to say thank goodness that my son lost interest after they did the huge time jump when they graduated, but I overheard that SATAN shows up?! I might have to go back and watch what I missed. 😂😂

i have a theory that the only thing holding this show together is the art direction. the aesthetic is everything, its a tumblr masterpiece

"im a weirdo, i dont fit in" That was the must cringe phase I've ever seen in anything ever. This guy is somewhat good looking, popular, besties with all the most popular kids and we haven't in any way seen anything out of the ordinary from him besides his black clothes, and yet we are supposed to believe he is a goth emo or some such just because he said so?

A friend and I once spent an hour long drive with me reading out they kind of stuff happened in this show and laughing. Lots of fun.

The Black Hood thing reminded me of when Pretty Little Liars started to fall off too, the moment you realize the writers didn't actually know who A was and all the clues were not actually clues at all, they were making it up as they went along, using shocking moments that didn't actually lead anywhere to get people to watch over and over. Riverdale had that same thing, just felt like the writers came up with random chaos episode to episode after a while. It was never a great show but it fully turned into a fever dream of nonsense. It worked for PLL, the show is garbage but I loved it, Riverdale was a little too much for me, nut I kinda agree, it's almost so bad and insane that it's good.

The town of Riverdale has enough lore to fill it's own SCP entry.

I made it most of this video without laughing out loud at the twists but the visual reveal of the guy in his 1960s stuntman costume standing next to his rocket got me

The “Queen of the bees” moment, with him echoing her lines and the show moving up the graph absolutely kills me every time 😂

This video taught me about the insanity of Riverdale AND the origin of the "It's me Austin" meme. Thank you for such educational content

It baffles me that despite watching so many videos criticizing and making fun of Riverdale, I had never heard about 85% of the crazy plot points revealed in this video. This is WILD. This is the first take on the series to actually make me understand why it still exists if everyone knows it sucks: it's just too unhinged to look away.

It’s so weird that a wholesome comic series about teenagers getting shakes turned into this.

I wrote a proper bonkers ending for Season 4. Why? Why _not?_ The spooky prep school kids are chasing Archie and Veronica after murdering Jughead when the cartoon-mask Archie and Veronica from the murder-VHS tapes show up, and the prep kids are distracted fighting them. The murder-cartoon people fight and kill the prep school kids... then take their masks off to reveal that they _are_ Archie and Veronica. But OH NO they're actually _evil_ Archie and Veronica from an _evil_ universe where they and Veronica _did_ murder and eat Jughead! And now they're traveling dimensions to murder and eat _all_ the Jugheads ever, _and_ cannibalize their alternate-universe selves, and Betty runs into _her_ alternate-universe-cannibal self too! But TWIST alternate!Betty is from a _different_ universe, and she already killed murder-cannibal Betty, and she teams up with Normal Betty to save Archie and Veronica! And the leader of the spooky prep school kids is _her_ universe's Jughead, and they're actually a secret organization dedicated to stopping the interdimensional cannibals, and _this_ Betty and Jughead are in love! So the normal-universe Archie, Veronica, and Betty team up with alternate Betty and Jughead to stop the murder-cannibals, but OH NO alternate-Betty betrays them, because she was _actually_ murder-cannibal Betty this whole time, and _she_ killed the _good_ version of herself and lied about it! BUT EXTRA TWIST normal Jughead has been working with his alternate self THIS WHOLE TIME and was only _pretending_ to be dead, and the bit where the prep school kids murder him was all planned to make the evil cannibals _think_ he was out of the picture! Anyways, in the finale it's revealed that alternate spooky Jughead was lying about being from another dimension (but all the other alternate selves believed it for real), and they're _actually_ from a secret cloning lab in the woods near Riverdale that's been making clones of Archie, Betty, Veronica, and Jughead for secret experiments, and the big reveal is that the people running the lab are _also_ Archie, Betty, Veronica, and Jughead, and they claim to be the originals, but they're actually clones too and they killed the scientists who were running the place originally. Then Spooky Jughead leads his spooky prep school kids into a revolution against the evil clones in charge, and Spooky Jughead sacrifices himself to blow up the lab with all the clones in it so that this tragedy will never repeat itself and also because he's mourning the loss of his version of Betty, who I will remind you he was dating, and he can't bear to live in a world without her. It's very sad, Archie has to drag Jughead out to stop him trying to save his clone. Big kaboom, end of season, don't forget a quick cliffhanger where Veronica makes a phone call to someone and tells them the lab was destroyed because SHE KNEW SOMETHING! What _did_ she know? We'll figure it out in season 5!

"but at least shes got her dear old daaa- *OH NOOOOO*

The "including Jughead's beanie" is so oddly hilarious.

And to think, he wrote this BEFORE the season where everyone gets superpowers, and WELL before the TIME TRAVEL season. Riverdale is like if you gave an aspiring writer a monkey's paw wish that they would get to write a TV show about whatever they wanted, but it was the only show they would ever work on, so they just decided to put every single story idea they'd ever had into it. All at once. One right after the other. Regardless of how much (or how little) sense it makes.

im sorry hold on i need to get past the "beautiful boy jail"....

Turning your theory behind the final scene of season 1 into an Ace Attorney bit is an immaculate creative choice ngl

Fun fact: The only reason they did that “Jughead is dead” cliffhanger for season 4 was because Cole Sprouse was cold and didn’t want to shoot that scene because he would have to wear no clothes, so they re-wrote it to make it seem like he was dead.

I imagine Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa telling the other writers that they could do anything they wanted as long as it didn't interfere with his erotic fanfiction.

You somehow got me wanting to watch the whole damn series of a show I never even think about in the first 5 seconds of this. That’s like some kind of video sorcery. And you compared it to freakin wrestling. I’m in. I gotta watch this show.

Coming back to this now that riverdale had its final episode last night. Godspeed, you funky little acid trip of a tv show

Fun fact: the scene were they tease Junkhead "death" was total improvisation because Junkhead's actor didn't want to film the scene because it was too cold to be Half Naked at night in the middle of nowhere. So they made up the fact that he was dead as an excuse as to why he wasn't there and the rolled with it for the next season, if that's not genius I don't know what that is.

Riverdale, the show went from trying to be the cool, hip, dark and edgy adaptation of a comic you’d get from the supermarket, to being a contest by the writers to see how they can outdo themselves with every insane plot thread they can come up with for every season. It’s gotten to the point where they’re just embracing how stupid this show is.

my favorite thing to do at parties is convince people to pick a random episode of Riverdale and watch it through. the first time I did it, I got nervous, what if somehow we picked a boring episode? …after season 1, there are no boring episodes. it’s all bonkers from yonkers.

AS AN ASEXUAL PERSON I AM. SO MAD THERY ERASED THAT. LIKE HE COULD STILL HAVE A RELATIONSHIP (im ace and im dating someone) BUT DONT MAKE HIM ALLO.

Hearing the show explained like this makes it feel like they were playing and-then improv

When trying to tackle modern teenage social issues it's probably best not to have your teenage characters portrayed by incredibly athletic people in their mid 20s

42:22 The way you say "and" is so hypnotizing that it keeps me coming back to this video even a year after its creation

the wildest part is this doesnt even mention the superpowers

This makes me realize that Riverdale might’ve worked really well as a Twilight Zone-style, psychological horror series from the beginning. It could’ve been a cool way to deconstruct teen drama shows by having the series start out intentionally cliche, but get increasingly creepy and unsettling as the show goes on. The plot’s constant shark jumping would make more sense if it were the work of some unknown Lovecraftian monster.

There’s a lot of “royalty” in this show. -Gargoyle king -Rat king -Queen of the bees

All they needed to do for the Black Hood was to imply that Betty's father purposefully put in contacts to avoid being identified through the only manner that bystanders would've had at identifying him- since his eyes are the only visible feature he sports. The future explanation for why his eyes were green at that dinner table could've simply been that he'd gotten so used to the contacts that he'd just forgotten to take them out.

Why do I feel like I’m sitting through a math lecture? I can’t keep up lol

I just love jughead's "weird hat" monologue. It's such a pure cringe that makes me laugh hard every single time.

This is the kind of content I live for: 40+ minutes of dissecting shows I've never watched (and will likely never watch).

There's something so hilarious about the revelation that Cheryl keeps her brother's body and talks to it and that whole thing is just treated like something you'd resolve in a sitcom episode. 'oh that quirky Cheryl!'

This video cuts off after the 5th season, it's worth reading random sentences from the "List of Riverdale Episodes" wikipedia page article. "She awakens in 1944, and is met by the angel Raphael, in the form of Jughead, who reveals to her she can time travel. She helps a black family and prevents Riverdale from becoming a sundown town, despite opposition from Percival, and is sent to the day of MLK's assassination in 1968. Raphael in the form of Toni tells her she can't save him, but can protect the black community from Percival. " "Veronica is revealed to have been exiled to Riverdale by her parents after having a role in James Dean's accident. " "Following the murder of Emmett Till, Jughead attempts to connect with Tabitha, who eventually leaves to tour the country with Till's family. " "Heather coaches Cheryl in the arcane arts after revealing to Cheryl that she is a witch."

I can't believe they killed off Jason, atleast that early in the show. The twins always played a big role in the comics. Hell they even had their own comics. One where one of them was the anti-christ