No video :(

Romantic Attraction: How A Straight Guy Can Crush on a Gay Guy

Подписаться 1,4 тыс.

Просмотров 41 тыс.

50% 1

Can a straight guy catch feelings, crush on, or fall in love with another guy? What is romantic attraction, and does it exist alongside sexual attraction? Are they completely unrelated? I answer those questions and more.
Part of the #BPD fam? Follow me on Twitter! / borderlineleo

Опубликовано:

6 сен 2024

Ссылка:

Скачать:

Готовим ссылку...

Добавить в:

Мой плейлист

Посмотреть позже

Комментарии : 215

@Cocopander 4 года назад

I am one hundred percent with you. Romantic attraction is the lead and sexual attraction follows. In the gay community, I’ve always felt like I’m on the outside because I’m not a hookup person. I’m happy to find someone else who understands. I feel like gay culture doesn’t accept these aspects of people and we can only participate in hookups with relationships to follow. 😐

@mervyngreene6687 3 года назад

I agree. I think sexual attraction alone or at first is dangerous. I know a lot of people who are attracted to the wrong person. I have rarely heard of someone having future problems with someone who they were initially romantically attracted to.

@6iaZkMagW7EFs 4 месяца назад

Yeah I wanted to explore my bi-sexuality because I noticed I had feelings for my close friends only to go on Grindr and be disappointed when it turned out to be all old guys, dick pics, and drug use.

@heckyeah8292 2 года назад

I think I get what you mean, I've been in love with a supposedly straight colleague of mine, I don't wanna fantasize having sex with him, I just wanna take care of him, make him happy and be by his side when he needs me. And I just wanna be a better person to get on his league. Although I really wanna give him a huge hug

@jlbcon День назад

That's not "romance". It's just real friendship.It's sad that this isn't common. But I have straight guy friends that I really do care about like this that actually can return the sentiment.

@DriDriezy03 4 года назад

Honestly, I think dude's comment of, "If I was gay, I would date you" was him giving you the go-ahead. He just didn't want to say it.

@benjaminmutch1670 3 года назад

I'm cautious about it being manipulation. I've had that phrase used to keep me hooked.

@joeyshrum2218 Год назад

No I think a your wrong about that.

@HandsomeBoyGarion Год назад

I’m never being gay never ever

@kingsleychinonso2662 8 месяцев назад

It’s manipulation

@pmwkiy6879 7 месяцев назад

I agree. He's letting you know that he's that way inclined.

@Ronald-ks2iy Год назад

I’ve always been a “friends first” type of person. I will kiss but having sex is taking a huge step for me because the act of making love to me is us expressing our romantic emotions to each other this why it’s called “making love.” Needless to say being a gay man my concept(s) of romantic love has left me celibate but in a good way. I just have not met that man that gets me because I can only be with someone that does, to understand me is to respect me. I don’t just talk the talk, I walk the walk too and it’s why being friends first is so essential. Our life experiences, good and bad are embedded in our psyches, we are layered like onions and it takes time for us to reveal ourselves to others that are vying for out time & affections. As the layers peel back we either become more intrigued, more attracted or not. In the event you discover you’re not as attracted to that person as you thought you were initially at least your departure wouldn’t be as awkward because you did not give them a piece of your soul when you laid with them.

@Iamlightning333 Месяц назад

Well said! I am very much in the same vibe. I’ve never experienced someone articulating these nuances, thank you!

@figureheadaaron 4 года назад

You're an empath. Please keep your boundaries strong with your love-attachment style. Straight narcissistic men can exploit and use this against you - you don't want to end up with painful unrequited love of that sort.

@Clintsessentials 4 года назад

True

@ImaginaryMdA 4 года назад

I think you are making a lot of assumptions about someone through the lens of youtube videos.

@julianbluefeather8491 3 года назад

Lol been stuck in that for 3 years

2 года назад

This is actually happening to me right now.

@CorridorOfMirrorsRemixes 2 года назад

THANK YOU. SOMEONE WITH A F**KING BRAIN AND COMMON SENSE.

@Metrosplash 2 года назад

You just illuminated something for I’ve pondered my adult life. A number of guys I’ve worked with in my twenties and thirties, when drunk of course, would be like “Mark, I, I, I’m in love with you.” But not sexually, and always result in a passionate make out. Then I’d be like “ We can still be friends. You’re not gay but wanted to express your intense affectionate feelings. Are we good now? Let’s get back to being friends”

@billj4525 6 месяцев назад

They are gay on some level, almost definitely if they made out with you. If they were straight then they would just say you're a really really good friend instead of saying i'm in love with you, and definitely wouldn't make out. Nothing wrong with it obviously. Probably good that you're back to being friends instead though, since you don't want it to mess up your friendship.

@GameTime-yj6qv 3 месяца назад

Alcohol let's go of inhibitions. If a guy makes out when another guy while drunk, it's likely he holds some same sex attractions.

@malinagruen7523 3 месяца назад

This makes so much sense! I always feel romantically attracted to people first before I develop a sexual attraction.

@kylewambot2664 4 месяца назад

Leo if you still get this notifications I just want to tell you that I love love loved this msg, especially towards the end where you spoke about taking care of the person you find you're attracted to. 😊❤

@yomama9114 6 месяцев назад

My friends and I have a running joke that at every party we’re at, some straight boy “will go gay” for me or that I “turn them out”. It sucks because I want a boyfriend or I’d even settle for sex, and these straight men are just curious but not too curious. They always either just wanna talk about me and my experiences being gay, or they’d go as far as kissing me, holding my hand, cuddling, etc. And I hate that I attract these types of men because I end up developing crushes on straight men who are bi when they’re drunk

@kmarie7051 23 дня назад

They have the expression "beer googles" for a reason. I've known straight guys to get lovey with other straight guys when drunk, straight women with other straight women or lesbians and even straight women and gay men. It'n not that they are genuinely sexually attracted to the other person, it's just the drink. Some people can get mega h*rny when drunk and can sleep with anything. That's why many straight men can be turned out when drunk and women sleep with some of the ugliest men they end up regretting sleeping with the next day. Many straight men know women are easier to sleep with when drunk and some take advantage because their inhibition is down. So for gay men who make a hobby out of trying to turn out straight men when drunk might get s*x out of it, but it's very unlikely they will get a relationship out of it unless he turns out to be bisexual or a closet gay. Even if they are a closet gay or bisexual though, unless they are willing to come out and date you openly then you should set boundaries around that if that's not what you are looking for. There's plenty of gay men out the closet and living life openly gay for you to waste time on those who aren't willing to do the same. If a man say's he's straight and you are expecting a full blown relationship with him then you only have yourself to blame for building a false fantasy in your own mind, especially when the same thing keeps happening over and over and you have still not learned your lesson. No point in developing full blown crushes on straight men and wishing it could be different because it's not going to change reality. I'm sure gay men would give the same advice to any woman who was crushing on a gay man hoping he's going to just wake up straight one day.

@kbgregoire1 8 месяцев назад

I have always been romantically attracted to men, be it bi or straight. It's never been sexually attracted to someone, always romantically attracted to them. I know the difference, I've always separated the two. However, I am very careful and have never tried to convert nor force anyone to be with me as a gay man, although they know that I am, however, they feel comfortable with me, knowing that I'm gay (sometimes too comfortable which can be confusing) But I NEVER push the envelope. I always leave it to them and not make and advance towards them. But they know and feel how I feel about them without telling them. They always tell me they are straight and likes women, but I see something different with their interactions with me, but never ever pushes the envelope. I just keep our friendship and say whatever happens happens. If it has to happen, we will cross that bridge together. I leave it up to them to decide, so I don't mess up our friendship. From a 53 single year old from a Caribbean Island called Dominica 🇩🇲

@juanquintana6070 4 месяца назад

Thank you. You give me the strength to continue my relationship with a straight guy and his family. I liked him all the way, but friendship is above all.

@Bochanable 3 месяца назад

I have a history of “bromances”. Straight guy friends who find themselves having feelings for me and our friendship that they cannot explain. I’m a coward though so many times the opportunity for intimacy would appear. BUT I’m clear that I wouldn’t want to risk a negative reaction. Sooooo if I opened up someone’s mind and heart…..then it’s a good thing.

@Iamlightning333 Месяц назад

Yes!! The risk of a negative outcome from these dynamics frightens me too.

@innocentzero4277 3 года назад

I agree with you and I'm in the same boat with you as well. I get strong romantic attractions, and all I want to do is take care of them, you are not alone in this feeling.

@lukexumusic 3 года назад

I can totally relate to this. I've also been thinking about the possibility of it for a while. About a year ago there was this straight guy who was quite close to me. We were in the same school club and we sat and chat with each other most of the time. Since he was straight, I didn't even thought about "liking" him or anything like that. However, one day when I was zoning out, he secretly kissed me on the back. My initial and only reaction was like: "What are you doing?" And he simply replied: "I don't know." (in a serious way, not joking or pranking) I tried to pretend nothing happened later on and also quickly put this memory away in a short amount of time. I just never really paid much attention to it. (unintentionally) It wasn't until recently that I start to hang out with him again and made me think back to this incident again. I start to really enjoy his company and the way we care for each other. But now he is just as STRAIGHT as he could be, and we never really talked about that kiss. (of course I wouldn't) But I'm just really wondering if there's someday that he'll realize that maybe he WAS once romantically interested in me...or maybe IS...

@renealexander2703 2 года назад

The man who kissed you was bisexual.

@timothyxosullivan Год назад

You need to talk with him about this...

@lukexumusic Год назад

@@renealexander2703 totally 🤣🤣

@lukexumusic Год назад

@@timothyxosullivan i will! Someday...

@timothyxosullivan Год назад

@@lukexumusic relationships are very precious and to be treasured. Don't let this opportunity slip through your fingers. At the end of the day, the measure of a life is how much we have loved and been loved.

@arielllagunoablao7876 3 года назад

I saw this guy at the church he's so cute, quiet, shy and introvert and I really want him (not in a sexual way) but i really want that guy.

@xdtijnntssyu3314 3 года назад

what 😂

@kingsleychinonso2662 8 месяцев назад

Tf is wrong with gay people

@TreDay6793 2 месяца назад

Yasss the introvert men are just something else 😍 so mysterious sexy and you just want more and more LOL

@thefilipinojoe 4 года назад

I think a lot of people are too scared to experiment with their unfamiliar or socially taboo attractions. If we can get past our limiting fears and just take these romantic relationships to the bedroom, we might just discover a whole new world and reality waiting for our awakening. I give MUCH MORE weight to romantic attraction than sexual. I would much rather be in a relationship that is 100% romantic attraction versus 100% sexual. That's because sex is a very small part of a relationship, especially after the relationship is established, making the romantic attraction much more valuable. In fact, without the romantic attraction, one can expect the relationship to eventually fade - as attraction fades or a new attraction begins for someone else.

@nichill7474 5 месяцев назад

You sound like a demisexual empath. That’s me too. Not focused on lust or sex necessarily, but the quality of the relationship.The timing of this video was spot on for me. I have been romantically drawn to my best friend for years but didn’t know how to understand the seeming conflict. We both tell each other “Love you” and have great hugs and times spent together. I have been confused about this until recently when i realized i have romantic feelings for him but i don’t want to have sex with him. Thanks for sharing this. I want both of us to feel more comfortable in this “bromance” thing we got going on. I too am more romantic than lustful. Not that lust is bad but isn’t appropriated for most relationships that matter.

@iris1817 3 года назад

I’m on the autism spectrum and i do relate to you alot i’ve been misdiagnosed with bpd for a while so i used to watch your videos before-still do from time to time- I don’t like jumping into any relationship that started with sexual attraction unless i get to know them really well I barely have any sexual feelings for anyone unless there’s some strong bond

@brad10014 3 года назад

Yup. I’m the same way. I’ve avoided one night stands because I emotionally/romantically connect first. I’ve also experienced a straight guy falling in love with me and me with him causing some serious akwardness that we eventually worked out. I still love him and he me, but we realize we can’t be what we need to be for the other so it’s just close friendship now.

@renealexander2703 2 года назад

Straight guys do not fall for other men.

@MarciaSantos-ox1fk 8 месяцев назад

@@renealexander2703Wrong.

@bharatseth1394 6 месяцев назад

@@renealexander2703All guys whome you consider to be straights are not 100% straight.this is a thing which most people believe to be a case.

@peacefulbeast8386 Месяц назад

What are you? The gay police? 😂

@braggarmybrat 2 месяца назад

Really good point! I was an Army chaplain and counselor and had a number of times with a soldier in my office who met someone at a pick up place and then wanted to get married. Sometimes it was just a matter of days! Korea was the worst.

@LiquidReality90 Год назад

As an ace person who's primary attraction is romantic, I love love LOVE this video. You got a difficult topic across in a way that makes sense. Me and my partner (we just made it official yesterday

@GameTime-yj6qv 3 месяца назад

While romantic and sexual attraction can be mutually exclusive, sexual orientation involves either of those components. For example, a guy can be a virgin yet know he is straight be cause he feels romantic attractions. So if a guy crushes on another guy, the guy is either gay or bi.

@benwest2112 5 месяцев назад

I think about that all the time. I’m a very nurturing kind of person, even though I am a man and if I find a man attractive I’m also more inclined to think about taking care of them than having sex with them. I want to help them be their best self and have a positive outlook and mindset in life.

@FiratCanK 7 месяцев назад

I am going through this situation for the last 2 years. It has been devastating for me. Now things are even more complicated. Lost in all this sexual and romantic mess. Some of the things you said, I have really experienced it. Wish I would have someone I could get advice or opinion on such matters. It is all confusing.

@themanwiththecrystaleyes464 2 года назад

Romantic attraction is pretty common for heterosexual people. S straight man might find slender blondes sexually attractive but ends up falling in love with a female friend who’s a chubby brunette. He didn’t find her sexually attractive but they at some point connected emotionally. I’m an asexual man and the only attraction I’ve experienced is emotional. I’ve been in love with my straight male friend for 4 years. I don’t have a little crush on him I am very much in love and no matter how much I tried I’m unable to fall out of love. Telling him how I felt hurt our friendship: :/

@borderlineleo8119 5 лет назад

I bought a 4K camcorder and attachable mic hoping the video quality would be better than my phone, but I think the video and audio are both worse! This is what I get for buying a cheap one.

@adamesyiem 3 года назад

3:55... isn't sexual and physical attraction the same? 😅

@edshane3324 Год назад

Honestly with me, there has to be at least one thing that I am physically attracted to but I go based upon what I feel as an Empath. If I feel upon first meeting that I want to take care of them, I've found that those have been my most successful relationships I've had so far. By the way dude ... You're an Empath. That's why you feel like you do.

@bawaaly2683 Год назад

I feel I like to take care of him. I love him in person. But he don't answer to it. We use to be friends from a year and I started devolving feeling for him. I told him that I love him. He stopped talking to me. I'm so confused I just can't stop thinking about him. For the very first time I'm feeling in this way. He don't even look at me.

@kingsleychinonso2662 8 месяцев назад

He’s straight get over it

@RecoveryMum 5 лет назад

Love ur cat! 😍

@borderlineleo8119 5 лет назад

Thanks! He watches your videos with me 😁

@wesleywaddell4659 3 года назад

I totally understand what you are talking about and wondered if anyone else understood that. I'm amazed why most people don't seem to get that.

@bwill8426 3 года назад

I agreed with you so much. This is how I feel about this maintenance guy and over time we made small talk and got sublimitable messages from him and he straight too it was definitely the romantic attraction first I would say;)

@TreDay6793 2 месяца назад

Wtf are you living my life 😂 I have a maintenance guy too same situation at least my brain and heart think so! This video gave me clarity on my crush

@joeyshrum2218 Год назад

You are not alone. If I find people attractive I crave them on a level that does not have anything to do with my genitals.. I too have BPD.

@Banyita-shema Месяц назад

Hey, I am bisexual but I am unable to develop attractions to men. I have been stuck dating women while hiding my sexuality. I want to date men and become gay since then I wouldn’t need to “come out” all the time. So how do I get into guys?

@sashamellon822 Год назад

I think you’re mixing up platonic brotherly love leading to potential sexual attraction. Put it this way, ask any gay man if they want to have sex with any women they admire? Unless they are curious nothing will happen. It’s just why they are gay. So don’t waste your time.

@shadown5757 Год назад

The cat appearing and disappearing was hilarious 🤣

@renealexander2703 2 года назад

No. Any man that falls for another man is not straight. He is gay or bisexual.

@juanquintana6070 2 года назад

Well, that's the problem. Labels against persons. I feel atraction for men, but not all the men, just some. But in the past, I met a girl and I had a relationship. We were living together happily, but deep inside my liking for men was too strong, so we decided to split, but in general, anything can happen if a person is open.

@renealexander2703 2 года назад

@@juanquintana6070 , if a person is "open," they are not straight. They are bisexual or pansexual.

@juanquintana6070 2 года назад

@@renealexander2703 I am more into the Kinsey scale. You have a main atraction, but have a degree of tolerance with the other sex. I don't believe 100% in straight or bisexual. But is only my opinion.

@renealexander2703 2 года назад

@@juanquintana6070 , but that's dismissing people who are 100% straight or gay. I am 100% straight and so are many other people. And some people are 100% gay.

@juanquintana6070 2 года назад

@@renealexander2703 No. In the Kinsey scale if you are in point 1 for instance you are 100% straight, and if you are in point 10 you are 100% gay or else. In between start the tolerance towards one gender or another. There are times, especially when you are young that you are exploring or finding your way. Some people takes more or less time to get it.

@andyroth84 Год назад

This is very helpful! I've only recently become aware of the difference between Romantic and Sexual attraction. I know now that I'm Bi-romantic. I've always been shy sexually and generally want to get to know someone a little before being too intimate, though I have had a few casual encounters. My few sexual experiences growing up were with friends. I have difficulty getting initiating sex and always seem to end up in the friend zone.. Women would think I'm gay because I don't move fast enough or perhaps seemed to want a deeper relationship than they were prepared for. Gay men seem to think I'm straight, and I'm shyer about men sexually. I've had a few of sexual relationships where the other person (man or woman) didn't want the romantic attachment and rejected me. I also tend to get crushes on people. I'm currently married to a woman, who I'm very bonded with, but wanting a relationship with a man. I have a friend I'm close to and feel that romantic attraction for and he seems to feel something back. I know he likes women, and hasn't said anything about male attractions but it seems likely. Thanks for the clarification, I was ready to hear this! Also helps me adapt to Polyamory, I can be romantic with people and not worry about the sexual part of things.

@lukethorsell8699 5 лет назад

I see a cute guy and think, “why don’t I look like that” lol

@borderlineleo8119 5 лет назад

But I've had the exact same thought looking at you😊

@lukethorsell8699 5 лет назад

Borderline Leo 🙈🙈🙈

@shaungerald23 2 года назад

I feel the same. I can't be sexual with anyone until I've developed an emotional or romantic attraction first. I can do it but I get nothing out of it. And I can't do hook ups. Just not for me.

@johns7868 4 месяца назад

I am gay and have str8 friends I find myself drawn to and it's definitely not a sexual thing. I don't say a thing because I want nothing misinterpreted. We have have things in common and enjoy each other company when having lunch or something like that.

@DeafSeattleGuy36 2 года назад

Great video! I think I'm either most likely to be homo-romantic bisexual (meaning that I'm attracted to men emotionally and sexually (as in their looks). I'm a man, but I don't really enjoy sex with men. I enjoy sex with women, but I'm not emotionally attracted to women. I can appreciate the beauty of women, but the beauty of men are completely on another level. On some other days, my sexuality is very fluid. I feel very straight, other days, very gay. It's interesting.

@zoeymckeown3194 Год назад

what's your finger ratio? I guess the ring finger on your right hand is longer than the index finger?

@DeafSeattleGuy36 Год назад

@@zoeymckeown3194 no, my ring finger on my right hand is shorter than my index finger on my right hand. What does that mean?

@TreDay6793 2 месяца назад

Dude i really feel you!! And to the comment above me my ring finger and index finger are the same size on my right hand, lol what does that mean?!

@kmarie7051 23 дня назад

@@TreDay6793 The ring finger size doesn't apply to men, only to some lesbians. That's because not all homosexual people become homosexual for the same reason, especially different sexes. There's differences in gay men's brain relating to sexual orientation compared to heterosexual men that lesbians don't have as well like the third interstitial nucleus of the anterior hypothalamus (INAH3). Same difference found in homosexual male sheep( called the ovine sexually dimorphic nucleus (oSDN) in sheep) and in hormonal lab treated animals like rats called the sexually dimorphic nucleus in the preoptic area (SDN-POA) in rats. it's believed that gay men, during some point in fetal life, were exposed to unusually low levels of androgens, which allowed their hypothalamic circuits to develop in a female-typical direction. It's believed genes help set these levels but it's still unsure which genes these are. In general, few major genes have been identified in the field of behavioral genetics; most heritable psychological traits seem to be influenced by multiple genes, each of modest effect. This could well be true for sexual orientation too. If so, different individuals might carry different complements of “gay genes” and thus exhibit different kinds of homosexuality for example some more gender non conforming than others. And single genes might be decisive in some families but play no role in others. Genes are involved one way or another in the pathway by which sex hormones influence their target tissues. A study found that a minority of straight people share a predisposing factor with gay people of the same sex. It's lkely this predisposing factor is one that predicts gender nonconformity in childhood and/or in adulthood. It has been hypothesized that homosexuality results from inhereting a set of several feminizing genes. If this hypothesis is correct, the straight men who share a predisposing factor with gay men might be those who have inherited some of these feminizing genes, but not enough to make them gay. Male homosexuality is package of gender variant traits, If a man inherits a few of these genes, he will have some feminine characteristics, which might include increased empathy and kindness, decreased aggressivness and the like, These genes increase his attractivness to women, permitting him more sexual access and thus offering him the likelihood of having more offspring. If a man inherits all of these genes, however, he will be feminized to the point of homosexuality, and his reproductive success will drop markedly. Because each feminizing gene is present in many more straight men than gay men it only has to raise each straight man's reproductive success by a small amount to compensate for the lowered reproductive success of gay men. If testosterone levels during a critical prenatal period are high , the brain is organized in such a way that the person is predisposed to become typically masculine in a variety of gendered traits, including sexual attraction to females. If testosterone levels are low during that same time period, the brain is organized in such a way that the person is predisposed to become typically feminine in gendered traits, including sexual attraction to males. The association between sexual orientation and other gendered traits arises because all these traits differentiate under the influence of a common biological process-the sexual differentiation of the brain under the influence of sex hormones. Whether a person ends up gay or straight depends in large part on how this process of biological differentiation goes forward, with the lead actors being genes, sex hormones and the brain systems that are influenced by them. The organisational effects of hormones on the brain prior to birth have permanent effects.

@sithabelamandlawenkosiwodu6298 2 года назад

5:10 that's me. Thought it had to do with my cancer placements.

@U.T.P. 3 года назад

Not possible

@kwokleongawyong1064 Месяц назад

My married business partner had a crush on me for 4 years. Even wife and his parents knew. But I was attached. Is definitely romantic and allowed to go beyond that. He even want me to adopt his children.

@johnbovay8353 6 дней назад

Most insightful. Thank you, Leo.

@benjaminmutch1670 3 года назад

Thank you! This gave me some needed clarity about a past relationship I've been struggling with.

@wesleywaddell4659 2 года назад

Omg! I'm so glad I came across this video. Just randomly. Thank you! I don't feel so alone now myself. I'm like you for the most part I experience romantic attraction not sexual attraction.

@marcvincentvillapa6463 Год назад

Indeed, I'm so much relating to this topic. For once, if there's someone new I talked, specifically male ones, and find out that I see myself, my values but also their brilliant differences, I can't help but get attached and fall in love... It's hard for me to keep a relationship out of dating apps, and long distance relationships as I haven't really connected in deep emotional level, and when sexual matters occur, unless I'm desperate, I can't really do it, I feel frozen.

@Xelda_Queen 2 года назад

I totally get your needing an emotional connection first. I don't ever see myself just hooking up because I too need that emotional connection and the desire to know I can trust that person before being sexually intimate

@khanscombe619 3 года назад

I agree. I see cute or quality attributes & I wanna be close to them, friends & see what happens next.

@emersonaleman7454 5 лет назад

I had to stop the video at 5.15 . This is how I’ve always felt with all my crushes

@borderlineleo8119 5 лет назад

It suckkkkkks! Because if we jump at those feelings and rush into our new sudden attachment, we're usually seen as clingy or obsessive and push them away. I have a possible solution for this that I'll talk about in another video :)

@grahamparks1645 3 года назад

It sounds like you are sapiosexual or romantic/emotionally attracted first

@chihuahuas4086 2 года назад

Hey, what am I gay, pan, bi cause I am sexually attracted to men but I'm Hella romantic atracted to females!

@billj4525 6 месяцев назад

Bi at least, but I don't know all the other terms like pan etc...

@JJ_TheGreat 5 дней назад

5:00 Sounds like you are on the asexual spectrum. Have you ever heard of something called demisexual? It means that you need to develop romantic attraction to someone before you feel sexually attracted to them. I have recently discovered that I am on the asexual spectrum - and I feel that it explains a lot, for my situation. When I was in high school and my friends were talking about girls, I just never “got it”. I did feel that some people were cute - and had aesthetic crushes on people, but no energy was behind it., in the same way as them. It was more the fact that I felt a longing to want to spend time with the person - and be close to them.

@Tornado557-c1h 4 дня назад

I feel the romantic attraction thing fs

@gordonpi8674 Год назад

There is a clear difference between those 2 attractions, it’s very rare they are bot applying.

@hewhodefies4148 8 месяцев назад

Thank you so much for sharing, I learned something brand new today❤

@robinbroad8760 Год назад

Good to have this discussion

@orellanalesther 4 года назад

I agree with your statement! I wanna take care of the person

@WilliamDunBroch 3 года назад

OMFG this marks before and after in my life

@jonathanserra2587 3 года назад

Thanks for this video this perfectly explained my situation with my bff and showing him this video made him better understand our situation. I agree 100 percent

@embreis2257 11 месяцев назад

it's a cultural thing and the problems are in our way of bringing up kids. aside from many cultures/countries discriminating against queer people for all sorts of [absurd] reasons, the point you discuss here is not necessarily linked to it. there are very conservative cultures hellbent on making life insufferable for queer people which nevertheless allow much more physical contact between same-sex relations than the US and other western societies. two boys holding hands in public and other signs of being comfortable with one another can be witnessed in surprising places known for all sorts of oppression. we should teach our kids to be comfortable with each other too and express their feelings freely without fear of getting ostracised.

@coupecruiser 7 месяцев назад

I totally relate. I’m Going through this right now.

@andyknott8148 3 года назад

Found this recently and could not agree more.

@LenHealsU 3 года назад

Well stated! I am impressed! What you say is so right on!

@10GOLDENWOOD20 2 месяца назад

You did a damn good job! How I can relate!!

@soniyaroy9634 3 года назад

Thanku for making this video ❤️

@jamieb9168 Год назад

I work with a guy who is married with 3 kids that I suspect is at least bi-curious. He did something similar to what you said about "If I was gay...." He went to a fair with me and my partner and there was an indoor reptile exhibit. One of the guys showing the animals was Black with blue eyes and I could tell he was gay by his mannerisms and voice. That's the guy this co-worker said "would be my type if I were gay." But he stares at me sometimes and has told me some pretty private things. He even said that his wife thinks he's "one of those 6% of men" but he didn't elaborate on what statistic she was referring to. But I highly suspect he meant that she was saying he's a married man that seems to be attracted to men too. He even told me something one day at the end of our shift and started out by saying.... "This might be a little inappropriate but......." Then he told me about going to a "sex shop." I didn't hear him at first so he repeated it and I was like "Oh, like an adult store?" He said "Ya." Then he told me his wife was too embarrassed to go in the store. And then he proceeded to tell me that at one point he was looking at dildos and the lady working there approached him. He told me that she said they have up to 15 inch dildos. But he said he told her he doesn't need anything that big. Maybe something around 8 inches. Oh! And at the beginning of the conversation he did ask if I've ever been to a sex shop. I told him yes but it was before I met my partner. Me and my partner both work at the same factory with this guy I suspect is at least bi-curious. Then one day he came in the bathroom when I was in there. I was at a urinal and didn't know who it was until he said "There's Jamie!" So he wanted me to know it was him in there. Like all the other men at my work, they go into the stall if a guy is already at one of the two urinals. That's because they're kinda close in a confined area. So this guy went into the stall too. Then when I was done I was washing my hands and I heard hime say "Hi-di ho neighbor!" (like Wilson on that tv show Home Improvement). I turned around and he was looking out the top of the stall door with the lower half of his face hidden (like Wilson does on the tv show) and we both laughed. I probably should have asked him something or hinted at my suspicion but I didn't. Instead I just started walking away and said "That's from that tv show Home Improvement" and he said "That's right!" Then I just walked out and back to my work station. But I don't think a fully straight guy would call my attention to him while inside a bathroom stall. What do you think? Do all these things I've said sound like he's bi or at least bi-curious? When me and my partner first started to get to know him, he said "We should get together for drinks sometime." And he also asked if we smoked weed. My partner said we don't drink that often and don't smoke weed. So he said "Oh, so you guys are straight shooters then, eh?" And since then it's been like he hasn't seemed as interested in hanging out. But then he did go to that fair with us after that. He brought his two younger kids too. His wife was out of town at the time at a concert in Montreal. We live down in southwestern Ontario. I think this guy is good looking.... He's like 6' 5" tall and has dirty blond hair and blue eyes. He even grew a beard a few months back like me and my partner had. And he did compliment me on my beard a couple times and was asking for grooming tips. I may just have to ask him one of these days if we're having another private conversation. I was pretty shocked when he shared that information about going to the sex shop! I think those are strong hints he's bi-curious at least and wants to play.

@caveredecorator5310 4 месяца назад

then what happened

@jamieb9168 4 месяца назад

@@caveredecorator5310 Hey wasn't gay or bi-curious. He actually came and lived in our basement for a few weeks after spending a night in jail after getting into a scuffle with his wife. Turns out he's an alcoholic and he thought 6 days in rehab would help. But after living with us for a few weeks he started staying with a woman he met on a dating app. I tried telling him she was just a rebound girl but he didn't listen. She was older and desperate (ugly and heavy set). She knew she would never find a guy like him again so was letting him live with her for free and use her car. After he came and got his things I blocked him on Facebook and blocked his phone number. He's a loser and hope I never see him again. I feel sorry for the 3 young kids he left behind with his now ex-wife.

@6iaZkMagW7EFs 4 месяца назад

Hey i thought I was this straight guy but at this point I figure I'm at least mildly bisexual. Either way I love bonding with people deep friendships and cuddling. I'm sooo lonely

@ryanalexi4446 Год назад

I'm straight but I had a man crush on my best mate in school... Thank u for clearing that up x

@kingsleychinonso2662 8 месяцев назад

No you’re gay

@kingsleychinonso2662 8 месяцев назад

No you’re gay

@gramps2matt 9 месяцев назад

As a real BI guy this explains me perfectly Leo. The personality part is my Pan side coming to the fore. The OMG that guy/gal is HOT and I'd do him/her right now, is my BI side. But mostly it's the personality that draws me to them first.

@aniketsonawane1443 2 месяца назад

I second this!!!❤

@yasssgawwwd5643 Год назад

Met a guy assuming he was Hetero until I found he was gay for pay and not ever had a relationship with a guy but a transgender girl yes. So now I feel I’m crushing on him and it’s more romantic than sexual but I want to satisfy him I just never told him how I feel until just now. I had to text it to him because I needed him to know I’m kinda hurting inside and why and I’m scared he might’ve been leading me on slightly. I jus wanna curl up in a ball n die.

@yasssgawwwd5643 Год назад

I met him and he told me he’s an addict to drugs and I did help him as much as possible including stopping him from being arrested! I wanted to care for him because he’s been hurt physically and I know I’m an attractive guy but this whole thing has me feeling bad about myself because I think if I was trans then maybe he would like me more and it’s a bad thought. I can’t stop crying.

@yasssgawwwd5643 Год назад

We had an argument where I screamed at him and he did it bak. Then after I felt bad for asking him to get out my truck and he messaged me the next morning apologizing and when I saw him he embraced me and I am wanted to say something then but I was scared to maybe be hurt because he hasn’t said anything about feelings for me. I’m really attached to him and I hate it. I hope that since I told him now how I feel bout him that atleast he knows and the ball is in his court if he is interested but I’m not getting any of my hopes up.

@shadown5757 Год назад

Excellent distinction between romantic and sexual attraction 😎👍

@LibranKing 2 года назад

I know what you're talking about. Im in love with a straight guy right now and we get along so well...but im afraid to tell him i like him in that way..even though im pretty sure he knows. I'll never tell..did that once with a best friend and I lost him forever.

@renealexander2703 2 года назад

Chappel Ayers, why tell him? Why not respect that straight men are not into other men? This is why straight men only want straight male friends.

@LibranKing 2 года назад

@@renealexander2703 I'm not going to. I cant help i find him attractive though.

@renealexander2703 2 года назад

@@LibranKing , nothing wrong with finding straight men attractive. You can't help who you like. I think it's a compliment.

@phillipdavis722 2 года назад

If action speaks louder then words just let it be what it is.

@kingsleychinonso2662 8 месяцев назад

Why can’t you gay people accept that someone is straight If a guy told me he likes me I’ll feel weird The feelings will never be reciprocated Accept it Meet someone who you know is gay

@IdBertParks 2 года назад

With all respect, I think more deep thinking and research need to be done. My personal belief is that romantic attraction is nothing more than a great friendship.

@carlosscuyugan2575 2 года назад

It is. He's just calling it romantic attraction. It's a deep connection with someone who happens to be of the same gender.

@k.vn.k 3 месяца назад

Agree 💯

@taraastube 5 месяцев назад

I’m sure you can be sexually attracted to someone’s personality though. You can for example find their humor attractive but not feel a deep romantic connection.

@JJDK485 29 дней назад

It's just brotherly love, not attraction, not even emotional attraction. 😅😅😅

@ALEZANDAR 10 месяцев назад

You are a beautiful soul!

@wesleywaddell4659 3 года назад

Thanks for making this video! Can we talk?

@burkardhanis 11 месяцев назад

I'm with you

@mervyngreene6687 3 года назад

I think that your friend was just trying to do two things. He wanted to let you know that he is not sexually interested in you He also wanted to let you know that he thought you were a great person.

@selfcontrolmeditations9542 Год назад

Is it possible for a straigh man fall in love with a man?

@billj4525 6 месяцев назад

I don't believe so. I'm straight and have a hard time understanding that. Being a great friend sure, but not falling in love or thinking about them romantically. Your mind just never goes there with another man if you're straight.

@Mcfreddo Год назад

So just cuddles then? Cuddles are healthy at any rate.

@Anthony_Gx 4 года назад

I was exciting for the video but the unneeded long intro almost made me skip it

@aarambheknayishuruat6344 3 года назад

He is right

@rickyco27 2 года назад

I am with you. 100%

@finalbossoftheinternet6002 3 года назад

Dude I’m just like you and I’m mindblown

@emerlasting 3 года назад

Thank you.

@shannonlynchtravers3635 Год назад

Makes SENSE

@ulascastillo Год назад

Wow. Thanks ❤

@TommyJohnson-we3nn 2 месяца назад

If you have a crush on another dude, you're not straight

@blancamendoza2714 Год назад

Thank you

@seanFreeman-el9dg 9 месяцев назад

I FELT SAME TO

@grahamparks1645 3 года назад

Also demisexual can be related to some of this

@lindakencana2181 4 года назад

You’re very attractive Leo!

@JoseFerreira-cd6bs 3 года назад

Boa noite

@chihuahuas4086 2 года назад

Hey are you an infj?

@galaxymediaworldwide4214 3 месяца назад

So a Straight Guy Can Have a Crush on a Gay Guy? like How??

@ambarpal70pal2 3 месяца назад

It can happen in some rare cases but yeah it's true, as he said in rare cases, you(straight guy)get drawn towards his(gay guy's) personality, charisma etc to the point that you feel you two are on the same page yet have many different views representing antagonistic seasons still you accept and vibe with those as well. And yeah it takes time to develop and overtime with romantic interest sexual attraction follows automatically.