00:05 Transition from disciplined lifestyle to the chaotic world of Bollywood 02:43 Seema Sajdeh grew up in South Bombay, in a nuclear family as the oldest sibling. 07:47 The impact of social media comments on mental health 10:16 Seema talks about her upbringing and family connections to Bollywood. 15:25 The societal conditioning of women to constantly compromise and prioritize others. 18:03 Overcoming fear and finding strength in speaking one's truth. 23:09 Transition from struggling with motherhood to self-discovery 25:47 Prioritizing herself led to clarity and happiness. 30:55 Challenges of societal expectations and pressure on women regarding marriage and children. 33:32 The decision to get married and have kids should not be rushed 38:49 Finding happiness and purpose within oneself is essential for true fulfillment. 41:19 Seema Sajdeh discusses her journey towards becoming more confident and the role of her female friendships in this transformation 46:39 Seema felt nervous about filming 'Bollywood Wives' while separated. 49:19 Seema shares about the challenges of being open on the show 54:19 Finding time to disconnect and regroup is important 57:12 Personal growth is about learning from our own mistakes and finding happiness
My parents conditioned me to have a career, be independent, travel the world, buy my own place..marriage was the last thing on the list. We are from a small town in Assam. Thanks, mom and dad. By the way, I have been married for 17 years now… married on my own terms, had my daughter when I was ready.
Same here. People who are “single-shaming” others are usually the ones who are the most insecure and unhappy in their own relationships. It’s much better to stay single than be in a toxic unhappy relationship!
That’s lovely, my parents are same. But I have gone through hell life medically. So they want me to settle and then plan the life. May I know the age when you had your daughter?? Because all are talking about that I need 3 years before I have a child, and hence I should marry sooner. I have sidle lined my career, i have no choice. But I am making my own choice, by applying for jobs again. But my gal years are affecting eating everything Even my gynaecology says that I should marry, settle and focus on kids 😢 See, I want kids in life, I was raised progressive but my inner calling is towards being a mother. That is something I want for myself, not for my fiancé, not for my in laws. But I want a more stable career and explore the world before I get anchored.
Omg!! I feel her..I have just moved out of my inlaws house with my husband because the pressure of responsibility on me for being a pefect bahu was making me chronically depressed ..i can resonate her so well..Every body is struggling in some or the other way ..i was so sick of living and tending other peoples needs and happines but not mine and i was struggling to have kids due to stress..finally i mustered the courage to say i couldnt do it anymore..i prioritized my mental health and left the house..i still get anxiety and have triggers about how i was treated but im happy my husband supported me..
Right but wat to do but my mom is not less than any grandmother she never understand me i'm also suffering this but in my own house? Wat to do feeling to get married but the marriage is not the solution here coz i live in a very small place with 7 people around me whu disturb me a lot i'm 32 but not get married coz of my acting career but wat is the need of getting aged , remain without husband if u r not getting peace nd mental helath here nd not focusing on career
@demijo9792 So true why why women are tied down after marriage .... Why the hell a women is one tied up to responsibilities of doing dishes of whole family and cooking food for all
I've been married for 16 years and chosen not to have children... and instead got myself two degrees.. and pursing other goals, this podcast has been therapy and absolute gold ❤
We decided the same, pursue our spiritual goals and live comfortable. Children are a blessing but everyone doesn't need to claim that blessing and some should refrain from it as they are not suitable for parenthood because of their own issues.
Very few have been this honest, straight-forward... yet not bitter about their experience. More power to you... and thanks for opening up. The manner in which u explained you were looking for happiness in the wrong places, touched me. Loads of love and best wishes ❤️
Very difficult interview for Seema clearly. She is not fake like the other Bollywood wives/ex wives. Being a straight forward person it was difficult for her to hide the real reasons and names while going through this podcast. Hope she does well from here on.
Seema is very natural and candid in saying what she says . I admire her confession and it’s helping me so much to understand myself . I am glad she came out of such big mess and confusion box . She looks relaxed and prettier than before because she is free from huge unwanted emotional burden
Seema came out of her shell and comfort zone to speak her mind and heart is not at all easy actually. Kudos to her ❤👍 such a beautiful charming smart intelligent intellectual poised lady🫶 thoroughly enjoyed this podcast. Accidentally came through and found Shivani one of the best interviewers ❤
One can totally relate to Seema and her thoughts. Unless a man is worthy enough to be a good companion for a woman in every sense of the word, the partnership turns toxic.
Honestly...we have these conversations amongst our girl groups. The mental load of women have to deal with is insane, and we have to lose ourselves to make others happy. Glad to see this conversation!
It took a bit...but I only started feeling comfortable with being single as an older person later in life. I'm embracing this and I am living my life to the fullest. If a guy comes great if not also great. My Instagram social media life truly is authentic and it truly does reflect me because I don't have to hide behind social norms and expectations.
Such a nice podcast, I can also relate to Seema, I got married at 22, it was just like listening to my own story, lots of guts to get a divorce after 25 years, where lots of women are just compromising , not able to break the rules of our indian socity
Indian men really need to upgrade themselves. One does not marry a woman to produce kids for chrissake. You marry a girl because ur life appears meaningless without her in it..And woman also should marry a guy who understands her...otherwise best to stay single..Most woman desire security at 22 hence marry the first guy who flashes wealth/status etc..Its so imp to be financially independent before getting into marriage in case wealth/status is important to u. Wealth etc can be self earned these days.
Great interview!! I love Seema’s honesty, rawness and advice. What a wonderful breathe of fresh air to hear about her journey and her perspective. 😇 Thank you Seema. 🙏🏽 I hope you broadcast your voice even further. Asian women need to hear more of you. 💕
She was the funniest on bollywood wives compared to other ladies. It was only because of her i watched both the seasons. She was real, caring and sentimental.
I absolutely relate with Seema! I'm sailing on a similar boat and long for freedom, to bring to life, the woman-child in me. Hope to make the right decision to be free from all constrictions before I lose every inch of myself.
From the moment I saw Seema on Bollywood wives, I could see she was just such an inspirational person. Whenever I see her interviews I always have to watch! I hope she realises she’s amazing
Absolutely loved and agreed & resonated with what Seema said. Love how you let all your guests speak and guide the conversation gently without interrupting
She looks more beautiful and happier now. Individual choice … choose things that makes u happy. Life is worth living not sulking ❤❤ I wanna c her in bollywood movies too … may b side heroine or some fun character she’s so charming n real
Shivani at 30 talking like she knows everything is what's wrong here! Seema has been through so much more and she can't compare and try to connect her dating life to Seema's 🤦♀️
Whenever i came across young students esp girls..my advice them to focus on education..skills, Carrer,house,car..maid, independent etc.everything should be under your name ..NO JOINT ACCOUNTS.. Never gave up your freedom.. Ur choices, hobbies Go for it,my dear sisters... Aim high🙏
Women finally has a Voice greatly said, as a Society we are Evolving, upgrading and Learning. Although there is no reason to break existing Relationship and fight battles on your own. Take efforts to Save a Relationship than finding excuse to break relationship.
I think society in general is changing as the average Indian age is drifting from 20s to 30s and it brings a lot of change in thought process in the society. It will gradually change more as we age
Shivani the moment you said why is everyone in the 'urge & rush' for marriage, I sooo felt it. Being single in our society is constant struggle of controlling ourselves from getting angry sad n annoyed because people out there have got only one topic to discuss, either body shaming or marriage, literally always. And for the same reason I've stopped attending family events and I avoid meeting relatives. This feels like a constant pressure of finding the right guy n get married, I mean how, u can go out n bump on the right guys come on its real life not a movie. No one ever ask a woman how is she, never, it's always get marriage, if married, have babies, if a parent, still have more babies. Let a woman breathe .
I m single and 33 yrs old. Whenever u face these questions make them sit and force them to listen to the entire conversation about why are you not doing that. What is the scenario. Give some examples.
I think society in general is changing as the average Indian age is drifting from 20s to 30s and it brings a lot of change in thought process in the society. It will gradually change more as we age
@@ShivaniPauPodcast your doing a great job. I really treasure your episodes. It's from your heart, unfiltered and realitable. Genuine. God bless you girl.
I left my house at 22, went to get an MBA. Worked for 2 years after. The best 4 years .. married at 26! There are highs and lows.. and obviously life is not fair, has never been! But that is life. I urge very girl listening, to please seek financial independence before anything. Study hard, get a job & dream. Your freedom begins and ends with 💸💸💰
A HUGE thank you to Seema for being so raw and transparent in this episode 🙏🏽 If you enjoyed this conversation could you do us a favour and HIT that LIKE & SUBSCRIBE button on the video! Helps us a lot ❤
Shivani as a suggestion for improvement I would like to say , it is better that you reduce planting your personal point of view too strong in a podcast. Whereas you should bring public point of views , different experiences to the table to discuss.
So I just needed to listen to this podcast today. I have been separated for 6 years n decided today that it's okay for me to divorce. I have been feeling stuck personally n professionally. I am sure I will come out stronger like Seema. I have also been raised in a similar way and been timid but that is slowly changing. Something is changing inside me as I have started to believe in myself and look for happiness within myself. I wish I could meet her and spend time with her :). lot of love to both of you ! May you have His grace always!
She speaks well , relatable and seems like a sensible woman , sad that she was probably over powered by her husband and his family . I m happy she is in a better place now and wish her good luck with her career
ln this interview it was not just seema sajdeh speaking .it was every married girl who got married at early stage and went through all this indian mentality including me. its very difficult for any girl to leave thier own comforting house and keep on adjusting for everyone around them.but no one adjust for that one girl who leaves her entire family and adjusts with them.and that adjusting is never an ending .
Amazing podcast, thoughts only someone so brave can voice. Also clearly so many unsaid traumas Seema didn’t even speak of, we all have bouts of anxiety and we know why. Its the mindset, the society, the patriarchy and sadly our own partners are an unfortunate accumulation of everything women have to cope with!!! Women give back and never back down!!!
I came across this podcast quite by accident and was unaware of who both woman are hence googled but more importantly what a wonderful refreshing and much needed conversation. Bravo ladies., bravo.
🎉Financial independence is key.With today's kids it is too much too soon.The mind is not ready to accept certain things.There is a time & a place for everything.Women have a never ending role in this part of the world.
Just finished watching the whole interview and I didn't think I ll manage to watch it till the end. Seema is quite sensitive and serious which I never expected from her.
Excellent podcast between 2 lovely ladies! Yes break the stereotype of a woman. I served in the Army and both of chose to have one kid and it’s a lovely daughter who completes our family. She turned 28 recently and is busy in her career and marriage nowhere close! We are fine…..just the grandparents are in a rush and ask us! Second kid was never discussed in our busy lives! Women are the bravest in society. High time guys and Seema aunty comes to terms with that! We have equal rights including inheritance! Use those rights to empower yourself and stand equal!
Growing up, I thought I was above all the things people say. I really didn’t believe that marriage is the center of my existence. I always wanted to get married but not desperate for it. It will happen when it’s meant to happen. But this year, I hit rock bottom in my career, my friends were married and I was suddenly alone. Those comments were ringing in my mind. “You’re worthless without a man. You’re gonna be alone forever.” I questioned myself so much that maybe I was wrong to focus on my career. Maybe they were right. I kept hearing those voices in my head. I realized that somewhere somehow I absorbed all those shit people would say. There’s really multiple layers to conditioning and it’s a lot of work. It takes massive strength.
Sometimes, i feel the same but was never interested in any relationship. I liked being alone but as i am aging, i always wonder whether i took wrong decision..
Even I feel the same. Growing up I was very sincere, hardworking.I have topped in schools& colleges and had a decent corporate job by the age I was 20. I am very well settled now in my 30s. But my so called friends who have not achieved even half of what I have done always show me down because I am single and not even had any boyfriend. Now everyone makes me feel guilty as if I am not good enough to attract a man and not desirable 😢 and worthless. What kind of society we live in where there is no respect for even highly intelligent strong women if they are single?
@@Soulfulmind-hj1tdthe problem Is only you thing you are a highly intelligent and strong women because you have a career. Men are women are different, so they serve different purposes on earth thus people have different expectations from them and rightfully so that the natural order of things.
So nice Seema I feel like she is talking about me we all woman go through this phase make ourself happy first Indian woman loose themselves in husband kids family etf imagine woman like seems who people assume have no pressure in marriage good seema that you finally prioritised yourself first happy for you , don’t worry about haters or people who judge you go girl ❤
Amazing interview ❤ refreshing hearing strong beautiful intelligent women from our eastern culture being so honest. Makes me not feel alone in my own thoughts and feelings. We conditioned at a young age in what will happen to women and what is expected of us. It’s never ending making others happy. Not realizing until a later age that our happiness matters as well. We can be strong, loving and caring at the same time.
I absolutely loved the conversation and the engagement chat by Seema and the host Shivani -- really nice and honest discussion about so many life lessons and conversations. Thank you for this!
I feel bad and at the same time sad for her. I am a mother of two beautiful boys one is a toddler and the other is a baby. Watching another human grow and making sure to contribute for the betterment of society is so beautiful. It's true sometimes it gets hard but at the same time motherhood is so beautiful and beyond any work that I would want to do. 💓
That’s your feelings and journey not hers What a shame that you are so judgemental even having watched the podcast. Evidently you learnt nothing from it.
Parenthood not just "motherhood" is a huge responsibility and u agree with the comment below, everyone's experience is different. Also perinatal mood difficulties is very real. I work as a mental health professional in this field and not enjoying every moment of motherhood is just as valid...Also no disrespect but the real test is when those children don't need you anymore...also unfortunately you can't ensure how those humans will contribute to the world...we can make no such assumptions...you can only do your best...I also know women go over and above and still feel they've failed as a parent... bottom line...let's have more empathy for people... much rather that than parents who think they're brilliant until adolescence arrives and their beautiful children push their buttons like no tomorrow... it's great to enjoy parenthood but you have a long way to go still... 😊
Marriage needs to be looked at more seriously. I think there should be an institute training young men and women about their roles in marriage. That will remove the self questioning "what about me "? In marriage.
Break ups marages no ones hands its destiny good bad ugly ok death is permanent every thing temporaey zindagi milana doobara nise na meried not mariwd children no children come aline gone aline 😅😅😅😅😅❤😂😂❤❤
Roles in marriage is subjective and keeps on changing. There's no defined role a person fulfills throughout the married life, there are Ups,downs,challenges and shifts which we all have to adjust to. Marriage is being taken seriously since forever and still is. Just because people are voicing their needs and wants doesn't mean they are "not serious" about the marriage. I am sure men face fare share of challenges in marriage but when it comes to women, it's endless. For centuries, women only were limited to care givers and that's not the only purpose of them, it's high time the society also realise that and men too, so that they can accommodate to the challenges and changes. When women see no space for them, they tend to leave and there's nothing wrong with that. There's no point watering the dead tree for life. Everyone got one life and it's okay to live it your own way
Shivani this n malvikas interview r 2 interviews wch i saw but the quality of conversation is top notch without crossing the line n yet getting the message across
Shivani can u please do somekind of podcast of women who have decided to not get married or not have children......their thought process,there courage,how did they make the choice n what r pros n cons
Yes please do videos on these topics. I a 31 year old married woman, very content and happy with just being me and husband and have no kids. We both have so much to do in life, having kids is a decision I am still on fence. I too need to know from people who have taken these decisions.
I guess 'Bollywood wives' does make sense coz it does contradict the "wives" narrative & actually shows these women everything & anything more than just 'Wives' In my opinion😅
This was such a great interview! It has resonated with me so much as I am in a similar situation to you Shivani and to hear such in depth conversation about experiences that we as Indian women go through is such so enlightening and comforting. Thank you!
It seemed like my future self was speaking and believe you me, irrespective of the age difference, Seema has provided life clarity. Cathartic..., I loved the chat. Loved the ladies and atmospherics too
well, i have not yet started the video but for the FIRST TIME i am seeing a sensible ad preceding the show. Thanks to people like Malleshwar for spreading this very important message of ' SAVE FOOD SAVE LIFE'. salutes to MILAAP👋👋👌👌🙏🙏
Shivani your depth of thought and perspective is truly admirable. ♥️ Also loved Seema's vulnerability and I am sure it will resonate w majority of women today.
Hii. Really an eye opening. Like I literally had to pause the video and comment. I never really comment , cause there is so much of insight going on here. I had to do it. Love the perspective when you moved out cause it is the only time you have for yourse. i have been single all the time and always use to complain but the amount i have grown into. cause its real men are gonna see for themselves. but i am growing into this powerful and strong lady. somehow wounded but i will get over it. love seema too.loved in bollywood wives. somehow found her genuine and loved her courage and felt her pain.
This was so unfiltered. So different than the regular boring bollywood interviews. Well, we can’t complain about the Bollywood interviews also because they need to maintain a repute.
Hi Shivani thanks for your podcast interview with Seema bringing in for a Millennial mind. Seema great to know you as well and needed to inform you in todays World we need to be equally responsible for everything and respect for each other with good mutual trust and understanding too. We need to be shoulder to shoulder compromise and adjust in life and keep moving forward with a smiley face always..... 😊🤗❤❤❤
Hey chanting really helps and you are really on the right path you were so honest and you are really so intelligent to understand where knowing yourself is so important
Im in my 20s and just loved whatever Seema explained so naturally❤I agree to every single word she said. It's so funny that inspite of understanding all this we still fall under traditional lifestyle & then fall prey to future consequences like divorce. Im sure from today my only & only 1st priority is going to be ME.....whether I have a man to love me or not but im 100% I need to be there for me❤
When you marry young you grow along with your partner, discover things together, and you adjust much quicker and d bond is much stronger between couples, whereas this brainwashed era of these paid feminist encourage women to marry late which makes it much difficult to adust as you have lived almost half of your life living independently. I am not saying marry for the sake of it but if you find a good person who loves you and brings you comfort and peace and can provide for u thn do get married evn if your r in your 20s(23-28)..The Bond will be like a tied knot(Inseparable and strong) between couples..Trust me 👍👍👍
I found Seema more intelligent and strong out of all the 4 in the show. There were soo many times Maheep showed she is dependent on Sanjay's carrier and same with Bhavna. Seema looked like she wants to give the world to her children. She is very driven when it comes to her work.
@@ashitamalkani3845 yeah...however when they went to Dubai and Seema set the meeting up with that designer, she new how to form connections as a business women.
I am new generation woman here ..i don't know why I felt this very illogical. She married that guy with her own decision..love marriage. Btw.. vobhi literally if anyone knows their marriage story..pyaar fir shadi fir bachchey...then khudke bareme sochna..ummm something is really odd here. She didn't may be decided to get separated because of her own life or happiness.. there is more the inside story I can sense. If you are so truthful then just reveal the truth what caused you to unlove a guy with whom she was in love with and married. I am not criticizing but just telling if a woman wants to really really be happy she should just stop faking...just tell all the ladies your true story how and what made you to unlove the man in the years and years of marriage. It's not self love dear.. you are just trying to coverup the facts with that self love ideology
Yeah...maybe it was regret for being so innocent and immediately marrying Sohail and even if you have a secure life, BOREDOM chimes in. Is that your life till death? Just a babymaker?
Marriage is not a warranty.. people changes with time..is there any warranty Ur husband won't leave u.. Share same bed,but minds are on the other side...u got it..stop g Judging about others,focus on your life...u bet your childrens life will be better then her.... Mdm HYPOCRITE
Seema doesn't talk about her husband's many infidelities but perhaps she signed an NDA? That said, why is it not possible for a woman to decide that she should finally quit an unhappy marriage? She put up with a lot for years and they were temporarily separated but as she says social pressures force men and women to stick it out in an unfulfilling marriage. Better late than never. And love marriage is no guarantee that love lasts!
I am a mom of 4 boys ( 24, 23, 13, 11) I was born in Venezuela, but we all are Germans... Inam is also divorced and has a great relationship with my ex! I completely agree with being “ selfish “You need to take care of yourself in order to take care of others! I so identify with Seema, I just got into the series on Netflix and so identified with her! Thank you for this great interview 🙏🏽😘💕
That's great I MUST ADMIT that when I first saw the bollywood wife's I didn't like any of them. but I liked seema because I found her truthful and vulnerable at the same time. Who is still figuring out what will work for her I can relate to her I also got married at 22 the first man who simply liked me showed me a little bit of affection after 21 years of marriage nothing is there I hv always been deprived of physically, emotinally and from last 4 years financially too. 8 YRS back I mustered the courage and asked him why u r not emotionally and physically attached to me he said I don't like sex much.he logically cuts me out In outer world no one can say him bad but I know he is cruel to me throughout out marriage. and I was emotional fool giving my debit card to him and taking proud That he pays my bills though I am extremely low maintenance women. So cut short I still want him and his affection coz I still crave for normal family. I WOULD LIKE TO ASK Seema can she share the journey of unloving, deta hment process of Suhail. Because I need it badly I am 41 and thank God I hv normal job I am from middle class family.
She just brought Seema and started knowing her viewpoint. She should have brought Sohail khan too. His viewpoint is also important. Program must maintain balance and should put forth opposite party too
Loved this podcast… Seema u seem to be such an intelligent brave n sorted woman!! U look amazing n have carried urself with a certain aura!! Genuinely a honest podcast❤❤❤
