Self Talk 

Psychology is weird, man

Arguably the most important video for people looking to get better/competitive at any game

i recently started frequently asking myself "what are the enemies doing?" and "what are my teammates doing?" during matches, trying to spot them visually/on the map/looking at the HUD and that helped me get less tilted and be way more aware of what is going on, leading to better plays. Highly reccomended

People, including myself, will often rationalize their negative self take as logic, reason, or people skills and that your assessment of yourself is sound and based in fact. It is not logical, reasonable, or tactful to judge people based on minor personality traits, failure to deliver arbitrary success, or actions they took at a different place in their lives.

as someone with borderline personality disorder, i often find myself doubting my abilities and getting mad at myself. this video helped a lot, and i think i’m going to try to work with the anger instead of getting angry that i’m angry. thank you 🖤

thank you for this video! it didn't just help me think about how i should go about the way i feel when i lose in Splatoon 3, but i've also noticed some events in my life that i could've done better if i wasn't emotionally backing up and dealing why i felt that way i really appreciate you and this channel and i hope you know that you're doing great work!

Even self-deprecating humor can lead to a lowering of self-image - our brains still hears that negative opinion associated with us, and gets us Really Upset Even knowing this, hearing Gem first mention how negative self-talk (and to some degree even trashing your opponent even if they’ll never hear you) can impact your game performance Drastically As soon as I pivoted away from both of those, I noticed my playing improve! Rather than beating myself for getting splatted, I thought about what I was doing wrong, and how I can learn from it to try & avoid that situation, if I can Instead of getting mad about being outplayed, I compliment the opponent for a good shot or play It helped immensely, and if beyond that, if I still get tilted? Time to put the controller & go do something else for a bit, this is meant to be fun, not pissing me off I played Splatoon 2 until only Lv20 or so, in Turf War only, because of a lot those bad habits of self-talk & getting mad at other the team. I got Splatoon 3 on release day, and have played it an insane amount since then - I’ve 4 starred both Wipers and a couple other weapons, and I’m finally working on learning ranked & anarchy modes, and really branching out in my weapon pool - I used to be a hardcore aerospray “focus on paint only” turf warrior That little change in how I react to “bad” things in game made me love this game so much more than I ever thought I would

Wonderful video. This is always a never-ending cycle for me-I make a mistake and get mad at myself for making a mistake. THEN I get mad at myself for being mad at myself because I’m a grown woman hating myself over a video game. But of course, none of that is helpful and I love the approach of trying to disconnect from those negative emotions instead of trying to analyze them all in the moment. That can come later.

My go to self talk when I lose last second is, “it’s ok that that happened, cause I love when I’m on the other side of that outcome”

This is the exact video I need. Been having this problem with very active PvP games, but it's gotten real bad with Splatoon. I noticed I get tilted faster and I go into Ranked and even Turf with the expectation I'll tilt/get frustrated. Even when my only goal for the day is to unlock abilities on gear (esp. before Splatfest) or to try a new weapon. It was at it's absolute worst during a 15+ game losing streak in Zones some months back, up until 1am trying to get a single win so I could end the session. I've made it a point to make the goal each session of Turf to enjoy the game, but that might be self-defeating. So I 100% agree with it being the words/thoughts we feed ourselves. I'm still working on this point and figured that of all games, Splatoon might be the one to finally help me overcome this long standing weakness of mine.

This video is incredibly helpful, more than I can express. I find myself getting upset often with the game, but helping to manage even the slightest bit to improve gameplay is substantial. Upset and reset us alone one of the biggest reasons I appreciate this video, Gem! Amazing as always!

Man this is some great advice, I wonder if it could be applied to anything else

My strategy is this: why get upsetti spaghetti when playing the funny cephalopod game? You're playing the funny cephalopod game. It's goofy. Be goofy. Throw squidbag parties in between matches, booyah for good luck and keep doing it to create a call and response when others respond to the first one. Wear the dumbest looking outfit for the lolz. I literally play my best when I don't take splatoon seriously

Forget getting upset at losing at the last second. I get upset when I suck for the whole game and get dominated lol. Seriously, my negative emotions ruined Splatoon 1 and 2 for me. So far I'm doing pretty well at enjoying 3 and staying grounded.

the 15 minutes to nothing is WILD TO ME as someone with ADHD (I keep forgetting "no thoughts, head empty" is real and possible)

Oh God, Gem became a Freud school(psychoanalysis) follower at the beginning of the video

What a good video. Definitely bookmarking this. Thank you for your work.

funny enough I think playing league has made me take losses wayyy more personally than I should. I looked through some of my old videos and screenshots of 2 and I would play Kensa Luna with special power up and run speed up. Which is weird because I don't remember ever getting upset when losing turf, or even losing ranked games. The most I would get would be a bit anxious on the third crack and would put off ranked for a week before playing again, and I got to S+whatever, at that point I would play gloogas and have a decent build. after playing games like league and siege (I like playing funny smoke guy,,,) and I've just been conditioned to think that not only the enemies are probably trash talking/targeting me for one reason or another, but my own teammates probably think I'm complete garbage when I die when I don't even care if a teammate dies most of the time, I'm more worried about setting up jumps in the case of a wipe. it's a tough habit to break since the sentiment has permeated through most competitive games at this point, where it's not reinforced your brain creates scenarios that feeds into it.

Peace. As a psychologist, I approve this message. Top marks, Gem.

6:57 this also provides unnecessary presser on you to play well and making it easier for you to make a mistake

Thanks for this Gem. I always feel bad and I start thinking negatively whenever I lose a lot of games. I'm trying to think of different ways to handle the situation when I get splatted, such as thinking about what I could've done differently to not die. This helps even more and gives me insight about them and what I could do further to make sure I stay calm. So thanks :)

You might not realise it but you are my therapist atm

Good timing Jesus, I've been getting so mad at myself recently and I've needed the helpppp

I have been struggling with so many sets of emotions these past few months, from sadness and depression to anger and fustration. Small inconveniences had made me change my emotions drastically. I'm glad I can enjoy the game because I play it more casually compared to other people, so at least thats some joy that can make my day a little better. I will just say it is a lot better to talk to someone you trust about your emotions when you (and that other person) have time and energy to do so. It bad to be carrying bad emotions for many days, without adressing any of that; it will not only affect your playing performance, but also your many irl activities. For gaming frustrations, it is ok to I guess "save it for later and hide that fustration", as competitive people always focus on winning and focus is important to win a match. I know it is not that related to the subject of the video, but I think I accidentally did an "save it for later and hide that fustration", but instead of a simple frustration, it was a strong emotional distress I had irl (it still affecting me months after). At that time I thought "Nobody cares about what I feel. I need to not show up any sadness to anyone; I have to be strong, for everyone."; that evolved to "I shouldn't be feeling like what I feel. Other people have it worse so I should just not think about me"; THEN that evolved into overthinking and paranoia; it was like "Are people taking advantage of me? why nobody understand what its happening to me? Why people asks me way too much from me? Am I only a tool to them? Am I to be discarted because what I feel isn't a consideration? what I am isn't a consideration?". That lead me to discharge my fustration and anger to many people here and there, many that were friends. Because I didn't explained my situation, nobody understood why all the sudden change of emotions from my part. At that time I didn't understood myself clearly enough, so it was very unfair to ask other people to understand me at that moment. After noticing all the mess I did, I took some time off to try to figure it out. What helped me is to be more open to how I was feeling, by talking to people I could trust. It was a long process that took me a couple of months to be on an acceptable shape that I am right now. I still regret the friendships I lost along the way, but this will have to be the learned experience for me. All of that happened without me knowing to a concious level that I was just hiding and postponing my feelings by so much time, weeks, months. It is important to self talk to see what things are bothering you. You will discover many day to day mundane fustrations that then you either fix, or don't let them affect you that much as you notice those aren't that important. However, I will say there is always this danger of not knowing if something you feel is very important if you underestimate how much that is really affecting you. For those last deceiving ones, I will recommend talking to someone you trust or talking to someone more experience; others people perspective are really helpful in making you see more clearly about the situation. There are many times in life, that we really just overthink the situation way too much, when in reality things are more simple that it seems.

Currently what's working for me is playing a weapon so bad that I expect to lose. I got a double kill in rainmaker with undercover

3:28 when 2 or 3 seasons they "fixed" Stamp, they did it by making the hitbox enormous. It goes over wall… hits you when you are on a wall far below it… goes far above than it should… It annoys me. In any case, I really like your videos and have helped me a bit with anger control issues. It isn't like I'm angry and harmful to other people in person, but I get angry a lot when I'm alone and by watching your videos I tent to think about those situations and be more calm. Thanks!

Another banger video from squid school. I always suspected you to be a meditator considering all the mindfulness concepts you sneak into your lessons. Great work!

Then there's me: feeling selfish if I start to feel mad at the enemy team spawn camping base for the entirety of a match on Brine Water *dear god, if I could kill a virtual environment I would* but I just assume it's all my fault because I'm a carbon roller, so I need to attack more and I'm just not doing it well enough, so them I move to explosher and then I get rushed snd become entirely defenseless and I'm just like "I just pick terrible weapons so it's my fault" Sorry, C+ tower control is hell for some reason

I've been playing a lot of Street Fighter 6 and man, the moment I let negativity in because I dropped a combo that would've killed, or did the wrong thing and got hit by Zangief Level 3, my overall gameplay starts tanking. I've been doing my best to reset in the middle of a game, and reflect on what went wrong afterwards and correct it, but it can definitely be hard sometimes. I know it's not helpful to attach feelings of self-worth to your rank in a game, and I really try not to, but my desire to improve in it winds up getting subconsciously tied to it to the point where playing ranked in that game can get my arms and legs all tingly and my heart rate up. I'll definitely be trying to apply what you talk about in this video to my playing more often

Gotta admit that this video is pretty timely for me because I've been struggling my self-esteem concerning my skill at this silly squid game and getting tilted as a result for a while now. Also, this is a good reminder that I need to start making meditation a regular part of my life instead of that thing I did one time 5 years ago.

After watching this video I got paired with a dynamo player who stayed in spawn all game for three games in a row and I lost my series. I tried to leave the group but I kept getting matched back with them. So much for trying to enjoy the game today

ive never been good at regulating my emotions (internally) and i have admittedly ridiculously high standards for myself in everything i do for no valid reason so... this one is going to be a problem for me... if i actually try to get into competitive splatoon like i want to...

Im dead serious my biggest strength as a competitive player is my anime protagonist mindset

my mindset is horrible, honestly horrible, because whenever i watch any game and someone kills the person im watching, i get tilted all the time. you saying how i could fix not being tilted made me tilted. so uh i might just quit for now until i find a solution

i’ve come to the conclusion that it’s so much harder to play splatoon during my period for this exact reason. i get so fucking tilted

beautifully stated video!! I saved some of this information for myself.

Pretty epic video. It transcends the topic. You are a helluva teacher.

I want Squid School to collab with HealthyGamerGG. I don't know what they'd do together but I just want it to happen. I mainly say this because I want more Squid School viewers to know about HealthyGamer. This isn't the first time I've noticed a bit of overlap between these 2 channels, and I think that with both of them in hand, you'd be able to gain an even better understanding of yourself, and feel less lost.

and then theres my dreams, which occasionally just tell the future.

thank you for clarifying that wasn’t Jerma because that is Exactly who I thought it was

Why the shell is your advice so univershoal

I sent this to my mom, she’s a life coach and constantly talks to me about my habit of blaming myself while driving, or while playing games with friends how I think every team fight lost was my fault. Good on you for making yhis

The thumbnail I’m crying 😭

Wow jerma looks a little different

I was an S rank at the start of the new season (peak S+0/X 1700 last season), and I’ve felt like I reached a plateau in my skill progression. This season I decided to do an experiment/project to improve my mindset and awareness, so I reset my rank to B+. I also decided to exclusively play splatlings in series since I usually play short-range shooters and I want to really shake up my perspective and how I think about the game. I’ve definitely noticed myself tilting during series this season because “my team mates keep dying and I can’t carry B rankers as a heavy” or “my team has 3 anchors and an aerospray so we have no chance” and other negative self talk. I can’t control my team mates or the enemy team or even my previous mistakes in the match, but what I can control is my mindset and the next choices I make in the match. Sometimes, despite your best effort, it will be impossible to win the match, but that’s ok. Being mindful during the match and playing smart and fluidly with your team is what’s important. Practicing good self talk and mindfulness, even when you lose, is beneficial and will help you improve at the game.

This is one of those things that I don’t need right now, but know it will help me in the future.

damn this splatoon shit serious

The book "mental game of poker" would disagree that every little nervousness is actually unwanted. You just don't want your emotions to cross a certain threshold, after that it does it indeed shut off your brain. But to a certain degree, your emotions are a stimulus that can enhance your thinking if they don't cross the threshold. If you don't have any emotional attachment to winning in games it's like when you're tired, you're not mentally active enough.

I tweeted this then deleted it because I thought it was stupid 😭 thank you for answering I really appreciate it

OOF this video felt like it was directed specifically at me. Trying to get better at high-level Splatoon has been really hard because I always compare myself to the pros, even though that makes no sense, since I’m simply not at their level. It’s always frustrating to feel like you’re not getting better at something, but I think I’m someone who’s especially susceptible to that. The amount of times I’ve called myself a failure just because I lost an X battle series is kinda crazy 💀

Gem have you considered becoming a therapist because I would sign up for that immediately tbh

Squid school: dating advice, brain science, and occasional splatoon

Wow. I came here to watch a video on game mindset, but it ended up helping my overall mindset too. Thank you for making this video Gem, this was something I've needed to hear for a while.

Squid school slowly turning into a self improvement channel

"the subconscious mind influences the conscious mind" GEM FREUDIAN CONFIRMED?????

On the off chance you read comments this far back or someone scrolls by who can answer I'd like to ask this. About seven or so minutes in you say something along the lines of "What occupies your thoughts near the end of a match?" And then list why thoughts like "We're so close to winning" and "Just hold out a little longer" can be detremental to not only your gameplay but mental health as well. I'm asking about my personal thoughts which are a little more like self affirmations? "Just need to make sure no one pushes a clam ball through this area I'm holding", they're more directly tied to gameplay than the suggestions you've provided yet still harbor the same general idea of "Wait and we'll win" that you discussed.

Its saul goodman

you know, this actually hits pretty personally for me, as a child, i would tend to dwell on punishments when i got in trouble and tried to give myself an excuse to be mad instead of actually collecting myself. of course ive grown and matured since, although im still a minor, its still kind of stuck with me, ive gotten better at dealing with it but its still there. anyway, this was a great video, and was quite insightful for me.

Not sure why, but Splatoon is the game I get the most annoyed at. It's what I play the most competitively, and I end up critiquing my gameplay too much. These kinds of videos are very helpful!

Thank you for this video so much. I struggle with this negative self talk both in and out of this game, and it may be the reason I can't get myself out of S and even into S+ Ive lately fallen into the habbit of blaming my teamates. And sure, if you look at my game stats, I'm usually top of the team. I'm good at knowing my role and identifying what my teammates AREN'T doing that they SHOULD be doing, and I get into this "oh if only I had friends to play this game with and could communicate better" mindset. Ive practically fully convinced myself that you could slap me in with a profreshional team and I'd mesh right in and begin to excell. (I do think this may be true I have a great understanding of this game thanks to people like you, prochara, and my own experience, and Im really not bad at the gam despite what I tend to tell myself) But Anarchy Series is a solo que thing, so I couldnt have friends to help me if I had them, and Im at a place in my life (Im a teenager lol) where Im not allowed access to things like discord that would allow me to make friends. My big question remains of "how do I get good enough", but maybe I'm asking the wrong question Thanks for this clarifying insight, this has been a wakeup call of things I already knew just clicking. Maybe now I can finally break out of S rank

Hey Gem, Im 25, a grown adult, but I find myself really into competitive splatoon. I feel as though I've "missed the boat" so to speak, on getting into competitive splatoon. I feel as though I can barely find anyone near my age who is willing to take the game as seriously as I might. Do you have any advice on finding other players for an older splatoon nerd?

Jerma from Teams era is over, now Gem is Ryu from Streets channeling the power of Nothingness

I've talked to some of my friends about this before because they sometimes ask how I stay focused and positive through things. Basically just everything you said in the video, and it's hard and takes a lot of practice, maturity, and a desire to better oneself, but is 100% worth it even just as a life lesson.

Unrelated to the topic, but I caught you "stamp hitbox has gone too far" in the background clip. That (and the turning radius it got in the same buff patch) are exactly why I think Nintendo has backed themselves into a corner now. You can't make it invincible from the front when it has those attributes or it's a broken special, but it has limited utility as an "entry special" since an opponent that can see you from a distance will just kill you. On topic, I absolutely play my best when I'm just focused on playing and I'm actually analyzing the game when I play, but I do hold myself back mentally. I am aware enough to know when it happens but not always able to make a correction in real time. I've gotten better at not getting angry but sometimes it's hard to avoid just feeling defeated before a match is over and not trying as hard.

The thumbnail has done irreparable damage to the part of my brain that tells me that Gem and Jerma don't look shockingly alike

I've picked up this terrible habit of self-fulfilling prophecies that just lead me to frustration. I analyze the state of the game, say "They're gonna get check here", and tbh probably play worse/try less, and they do get check. But like, did predicting that make me feel better now? No, of course not. So I try to focus on productive callouts, so that my mind is in the moment and has no downtime to drift to realistic pessimism. Even when I'm just playing by myself and my teammates can't hear me.

I unfortunately don't remember the story in as much vivid detail as I'd like to for describing it here, but I've heard about a moment when famous soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo took aside his teammate, who was about to take on a crucially important set piece, and told him "listen, fuck it. if we score, we score. if we don't, we don't." if memory serves me right, the guy proceeded to shoot straight into the goal off the foul (which, for the non-soccer-knowers, means that he completely nailed it). there's a lot to be said in criticism of Cristiano Ronaldo both as a soccer player and as a human being, but one thing he'll ever be remembered for is his skill as a captain, and this is an example of it that we can often apply to our lives. remember, the guy who got that piece of advice was being paid to play soccer good. chances are solid that you are not being paid to play splatoon good. so, fuck it. if you win, you win. if you don't, you don't. (also, when I lose at the last second, I think back to the times when I won at the last second. I'm not the only one who gets to do that, am I?)

Sometimes to know how to win, you have to know how to lose. After all, there was so much [Splatoon 3 for the Nintendo Switch] left to play.

Looking forward to the follow up video for people like me who play worse after winning easy games and being ruled by merriment and irreverent, illogical game plans. Please help me and all the other giggly squids.

I am so impressed by the advice you give that can’t just be applied while playing splatoon but also just in my daily life

is there a weapon/mode mismatch in the footage it feels like the protagonist cant get stuff done from holding specific angles or trying to clear mid with everyone buzzing around like worker bees in every direction for clams randomly

at the end my lizard brain psyched itself into expecting gem to drop "this is also dating advice"

Why is a silly squid shooter game RU-vid channel becoming one of the best life advice outlets that can be easily accessed?

Gem is actually my therapist lol, thank you so much for actually making my life better! :)

Break the cycle that blinds u for plays that u should be proud of, not focus on the results of what happened throughout the whole battle

Gem is the psychologist father figure I never had.

You're doing great. Thank you!

Thanks, Gem, I really needed this advice. Your RU-vid channel is probably one of the best ones on RU-vid, not just for Splatoon, but in general.

To answer the question, I love the game and I just want to be good at it.

Gem out here helping squids approach nirvanna.

This made me realize why my games were going downhill. This video was a game changer!

this came just as i was concidering quiting comp, thank you

I will alwayys go into every splatfest giving up and saying my team will lose aka shiver will always win. Frye and Big Man will always lose

just now realizing how much u look like jerma

This is also, and I cannot stress this enough, good dating advice

This is extremely helpful advice, not just for gaming but for life in general

This is a really good insight into the psychology of our brain and the mind and helpful for when doing just about anything thanks Gem!! also side note the part of the video talking about thinking about nothing and then feeling calm gave me sanitised octarian vibes 0.0

This is such an informative, wonderfully described video. This can easily be applied to the real world. If you're a young adult, pay close attention, bc I fr wish I learned this so much sooner. I also feel like having a deep self process the video describes can easily translate into the way you physically play. I hope this video changes people.

Fantastic video! Thank you!

This totally feels like it was made for me- like a few days ago I lost a game at the last second after doing really well the entire time- but now that I think about it, it was because of negative self-talk. I had been splatted twice in a row and I was thinking something like “oh come on, we were destroying them the entire game. how are we losing now” and I made a bad decision to just run at the rainmaker carrier and try to splat them to avoid overtime- unfortunately I wasn’t able to and we lost So yeah, negative self-talk definitely is real and can impact you!

By design, it's harder to make a big comeback in Ranked than in Turf anyway.

This video came out as soon as I got tilted every session, and started looking into meditating. It's a sign from the woomy gods

i really have to thank you for this video, as i've been tending to get rather upset at splatoon lately. hopefully this will help next time.

Thanks for this!!

Keeping this in my back pocket

Yes, this is also dating advice.

Finally a video for me

You, jerma, and Patrick Bateman are all the same person

unrelated, but was the 1:31 "This way!" a subconsious "Ouch..." ping because you thought you were dead, only to realize that you barely survived? thought i was looking at my gameplay for a sec there

Hi man I just wanted to say it's: "No, it's not a picture of Jerma, *nor I*." I might be wrong tho kthxbai.