Should My Wife Go To Work Instead Of Staying At Home? 

Can all of the MRA ignoramuses that usually comment here please read this? Thanks.

What great team work!

What an amazing relationship!!

Until he leaves and she has to reenter the workforce. I will never recommend a woman to be a SAHM.

You only need a GED to homeschool. I'm all in favor of mom's being housewives if that's the best way to go but it means we should not be sending girls to college, it's a waste of money. Get them through with grade and a GED, get a matchmaker and marry them off at 16 while they still have their virtue, which few brides do nowadays

This! 💯💯💯

Yup. No family planning or financial planning. Just the wedding and thinking below the waistline. Bubbles popping just like in the movie “Idiocracy”

I did that in my marriage, we had agreed. But then hubby changed his mind…..the marriage didn’t survive.

People change their mind when they get it to it

You mean losing your job?

But you can also work from home

@@leisurelysam5412 indeed, but this is relatively new, and it was not available when i had children at home.

@@maryreddell6529 but working from home is the best and also profitable for the family

@@leisurelysam5412 i do agree .. but homeschooling, cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping and such are also work of the at home person. Working from home could make homeschooling far more difficult. It takes time and patience because children need constant supervision. We found it would have cost more in childcare, tho i did work part time occasionally to help out. He would work days and i would work nights. That is not recipe for happy marriage.

@@leisurelysam5412 You HAVE to be a male. Males think, being home, means it is NOT WORK. It is a lot of work, we just don't get PAID for that work. lol.

Thats us

Same here. Most of the neighborhood was like this when I was growing up. Wonderful times.

That was me. My siblings and I were better off for it. My dad moved us from Queens to Long Island on one job and overtime. My mother was there when we got home and we had no opportunity to get in trouble. When we were all in a bit older my mom helped him by opening an group daycare in the home. Her business became very profitable and allowed him to not to work as much.

That's us too.

good point. You don't have to have a big house, two cars, and lots of things. as long as you have a roof over your head, food to eat and a good family values. you can survive. Honestly you don't need cell phones or all the latest electronics. Make your kids life what you want it to be.

This couple will have a wake up call when they see the current cost of child care.

@@tamiamyourfavoritedragon8890 Add another wife, to take care of the children. " You will always be First Wife"

And not just dollar for dollar. Factor in gas/transportation costs, TIME, plus all the other things a mom at home provides. It becomes almost a given for her to stay home if they have another kid

@@dtcmommy Especially, if he's capable of bringing in another 12-18000/year by working overtime. I would presume he's enabled to do that partly by the fact that he doesn't necessarily have to take care of the kid much. So the extra job for wifey might have to clear that opportunity cost too.

@@tamiamyourfavoritedragon8890 And, we tried that. Our 2 kids got sick all the time, with so many different kids in child care. So, paying for child care, days off for sick child and doctor payment, medicine. NO WHERE AHEAD! Working outside the home, was great. 2 , 15 minute breaks, lunch in quiet, got adult conversations, and a little paycheck. lol. Staying home was MORE WORK!

This is what im working towards . Good job bro🙌🏻

My Husband does this to but damnnnn😮80 hours

Good information, Dave didn't mention this aspect.

Yeah this is something that drives me crazy. Most people don’t want to pay for daycare once they find out how much it costs, but then it’s so much to juggle an at home job and a kid.

To be fair. Most guys, like myself, put off stuff around the house until we get around to it. She probably doesn’t want to live in a mess but I know many guys that don’t mind lol

But you can also work from home

@TheRain yeah but it depends on the type of work

Do you even know you can also work on the weekends or pick up 1-2 night shifts while he's off from work?

If child care is 1700 and she makes 4k a month then it’s worth it

@@inthebooks3947 A lot of Ifs here, we don't know.

Amen!

I.e. the new car

Get a JOB

@@marktheshark2569😂😂😂😂

But women need to be strong and independent feminists! Raising your own children is outdated, the TV works just fine.

@@baddog6003 this is sarcasm, correct?

that just makes me wanna cry :/children these days aren’t raised by their parents, they are raised by random childcare workers that are not paying attention to them

Yes cuz more moms staying home drinking a box of wine a day popping Xanax ignoring the child completely is what we need more of.

@@jacksonbilly9979 I think you are mixing with the wrong type of women to be mother of your child.

I stayed home until the kids were in school, then I worked part time so I would be home when they were.

@@marycarricaburu3683 bingo

Maybe you could work park time

Lots of people don't add the cost of daycare, gas, clothes, food, etc. Most women like this are working for a couple dollars an hour

Maybe you can start a business from home?

I agree. If both people are working full time everyone is tired.. if one person stays home then the meals are prepped, houses is clean and laundry done etc etc… if both people arrive home at 6:00 it really makes life stressful. Evenings then can consist of simply hanging out etc.. otherwise it’s make supper, do laundry, etc.. it’s all about values in life.

Nice to hear from a man who doesn’t want to see his wife slaving away and coming home tired and stressed. And also is not resentful of being a provider. In other words, a real man ! Good for you Sir.

Amen !!! We need more men with this mentality.

I absolutely love this comment.

Wait, what? I truly get that it's important for both parents in your family to work outside the home. But your mental gymnastics are something else altogether. Sounds like your mom provides good care (like many providers), but that is not you or your partner at home.

Yup. Easy to do nowadays. The homeschooling parents here understands and master this well. All it takes is planning.

You're so lucky that your mom took care of your kids. Now.. remember to take care of your mom when she needs you.

@@lzkrishmom 🙃of course 👍🏻

Studies show that there is absolutely zero difference in children’s academic and social outcomes for those with stay at home moms vs working moms. There is of course a GIANT difference in the children’s student loan debt between those two groups.

Don't let the net fool ya. This is a primary reason there are so many childless women in their 30s and 40s right now. (Usa).

exactly he needs to ask himself if they can afford the baby sitter, the cook, and the maid if his wife goes back to work.

@@mariad5275 why hire a cool and maid, just split the responsibilities equally

Cook

I bet you’re shoving words in his mouth

that is your negative assumption

hey mate , atleast they have a job and they got married before they made a kid. Thats already above half of thr population in terms of responsible attitude against life ;)

@@murderouskitten2577 Actually having the kid after marriage is worse when you think about it. They didn’t even communicate before or after marriage.

@@murderouskitten2577 that's true

This! I’ve told every man I’ve dated that I will be staying home until the kid is in Kindergarten. Early childhood is so important. I don’t want to trust that responsibility to a stranger.

@@blackworldtraveler3711 nobody is perfect .

Why was he so disrespectful? Did he ever apologize for acting that way? 🤔

He was probably really feeling the pain of caring for the family. Happy it all worked out in the end.

I was in the same boat. My husband was a jerk until I got my degree and a job.

Well said! 👏🏾

@@jasminejoseph8307 👍

My wife and I are retired Pensioners. Neither of us work. We raise small children Work 20 years, get a pension, then raise children.

Stay home man it’s not a man. I’ll never ever even if my wife was millionaire I would stay home.

@@diegodesouza9697 Well, there are times when a man may be disabled enough not to be able to hold down a job, but could stay home to help take care of the kids while the wife works. That wouldn't always be the case, but I'm sure in some instances it may be.

Yes, a woman should do something to contribute to family , i have heard a lot of cases like yours!👀

She was a user. You should have never allowed her to do nothing. I am stay at home mom. I don’t go to bed till 3 am. I exclusively pump breast milk, feed the baby milk, solid food, change, clean, cook, do laundry. It a a lot of work. Sometimes I wish I could work but daycare is way more expensive.

I forgot to mention I do dishes 24/7 by hand, broken dishwasher. Can’t replace it yet because our baby needed cranial helmet, nearly 5k.

I hope you took her to court for child support, but then again she sounds like the type that it would be like wringing blood from a stone.

That’s not a stay at home wife, that’s an overgrown child.

If possible, what was the cause(s) of the divorce?

I became stare crazy too and went back to work. I then quit my job because it just added to my work and I was just doing more work for little pay. Now I’m back home and my husband works two jobs. He also makes way more than I did at my job.

@@likethecolorgreen lol

But you can also work from home

A lot of these people making comments probably don't even have a girlfriend, so don't read too much into them

Whoa! I see 1950 has come for a visit!

@@tmusa2002 any husband that can’t be bothered to do that for his wife doesn’t deserve to be married. And aside from the high taxes, the 1950s were a much better time. We didn’t have a bunch of grown adults crying for a safe space to protect them from free speech and husbands and fathers actually did their jobs.

@@johnmartin4641 Your job as a mother is also to provide for your children. What happens when your husband hits the bucket?

@@kyloren8133 that rarely happens. Also, someone’s got to take care of the kids. It’s so much easier and better for it to be their mother instead of some stranger from daycare, and in some cases, it may actually be cheaper. If the husband dies, then the mother can go back to work then.

😂😂😂 enjoy being broke ur whole life with a single income

Tell me you don’t have kids without telling me. Like being a stay at home mom ISN’T a full time job. Bye

@@kaylaa2466 Are you talking to me? I have four children, but what has that to do with my question. Her husband's letter was implying that he thinks his wife just does not want to work, so my question to him would be is that correct ie did she work before baby? or is work not the problem but rather she doesn't want to leave her baby? Yay him if he has no problem going to work and leaving his baby but maybe she does. Two parents one baby they need to figure it out but for him to imply that she just does not want to work, I think ( quite possibility) is off the mark. FYI

But you can also work from home

Yup and it is a sacrifice many people don't see it like that.

Don't forget she is equal and independent. She needs to help pay expenses.

She’s not a man. When the roles are reversed Dave will lay into the fact the mans needs to work. When it’s the opposite it’s the mans fault for writing/calling in and not discussing it with his wife first.

This is what happens when you don’t plan for things like personal finance,marriage,babies,family,etc.. “Things happen” is also beforehand and not just realized after the fact when trouble starts. All about choices.

@@khanhcao3123 yes! Especially the student loans which for a psychology degree could easily be $80K. No reason for him to be the only person bearing the burden of income when she decided to pursue a degree and then change her mind once having a kid. It’s on he to be responsible for her choices and not expect him to bail her out

He didn't say that. He said that IF he worked overtime he could bring in extra, but he didn't say they're not making ends meet unless he does. The thing is, these questions need to be answered and agreed upon before anyone gets married and has a child.

He shouldn't have to work two jobs, but parents working split shifts is exhausting and sometimes dangerous. I was a parent who did that. Now I realize our family could've gotten by easily on one income in those days.

@@a.c.7069 The person staying home needs to find a job that they can do at home, even if it is take care of two other kids my sister did that when we was younger,, her husband worked fixing cars they had two kids she took care of two kids from people who worked at the shop where her husband worked at help a lot of people,, I raised kids, grandkids, and nieces and nephews of all ages, Do not want to do it again but that is one job that is in high demand

@@altha-rf1et Good idea. The parent at home could babysit or do some other part-time work from home. Also, that parent can look for ways to save $$ by budgeting carefully, cooking meals from scratch, etc. The caller said he makes $30/hour. That's a good income.

exactly, wife works nights as a nurse, we manage and we both make great money. she just has a useless degree and no prospects

When I was young it was almost impossible to get evening and night jobs as a telephone operator because they gals with more seniority took them so they didn't have to hire babysitters.

😂 why? Normal question to have

sounds like Divorce

sounds like Divorce

Your husband is an A hole…. Your not living the easy life

Exactly!!

Amen!

She can go work on the oil rig while I'll be the husband putting DVDs in the player wearing my pajamas.

What. U still have about 16 hours in a day with them

It’s next to impossible to work when you have a newborn or very young child. You would pretty much have to neglect them to get anything done.

There were lots of options available to discuss before marriage and having kids. Apparently they didn’t want to. Now easily avoidable things happen and things get complicated.

@@Carolina_Berean Good point!

@@Carolina_Berean I do it. I run my own online Poshmark reselling business and do contract work for my prior FT company. I do it all from home and I watch my baby like a hawk. Plus, babies sleep a lot lol

@@CLCxProductions Some of them.

Just living within means is enough. If they have to live below their means they had a kid they could not afford. I guess this is part of that “sacrifice for my kids” thing I hear about. It’s all about choices though.

And if they don't?

That's what you think...

My husband gives me the choice too, but I like working. I would have been miserable staying home. I did try for a little while and hated it. I do think this should be discussed before marriage but I know people change their minds. They both need to get true feelings out and come up with a compromise. Maybe she can work from home part time to increase income. I personally wouldn’t want my husband working constant overtime and our kids missing him just to misty have me. Hopefully they can discuss options and compromise. If not, there will be no winners.

What would you have liked her to do more of around the house?

Same boat as you , except for me I have a son lol

@@ashleyjones5396 I agree

Daycares don't pay much at all around me only $12 an hour and they only give you a discount not free child care if you work there.

Amen! Best comment out in this charged string! Everybody needs to live and let live.

My wife and I are stay at home Parents. We have your own resources.

Forcing someone to support you is wrong

@@joyaustin6581 My State will pursue you across State lines and drag you back in chains for abandoning a spouse. God help you, if there are children involved. It is a crime not to support a spouse, when you can.

Someone’s got to take care of the kids.

@@joyaustin6581 a husband and father’s job is to support his wife and kids.

I agree. Why indeed. Maybe more couples need to have a "nuts & bolts" discussion before getting pregnant as to whether they can make it work. If they are both willing to make the necessary sacrifices. It they're not on the same page then maybe it's just not the best idea to have a baby.

This whole video is disengenuous because Dave said its unreasonable for him to expect her to work despite the numbers. If she's his equal, she needs to work.

@@andrew8168 Yes, and she is working. She has already put a huge work into the pregnancy, labor, and constantly working to keep the baby alive.

@@kellyje11y Unfortunately too many don't realize how much work all of that actually is, but want to downgrade it to being nothing important compared to bringing home that paycheck. Money is more important to many than their own children's upbringing. Maybe they can't buy as many toys for themselves if the wife doesn't work. (That's IF they can actually afford for her to stay home).

Your husband sounds very lucky

That’s total Bull and you know it. Put on a movie and give them an iPad and they’re totally immersed

So true!!!!....They should hire Alice as she can live in a little room off the kitchen and have some life balance.

who said there is something wrong ? And even if people say it's wrong so what ? It's a free country, you can do whatever you want.

I can’t speak for the workforce but look at the younger generation. Raised by daycare and TV. Then we wonder why the world is in the state it’s in.

Nothing wrong with staying home. Problem is not planning to afford to stay home before marriage and having kids. Now there are issues. All about choices.

@@Carolina_Berean yup that's the thing look at all the youths getting into crime. That's the result of being raised by TV and daycare. Stay at home moms get looked down upon today . It isn't right. God did not design a women to spend 8hrs of day around a man That's not her husband. Since women have gone into workforce there has been an increase in divorce and adultery .

@@Carolina_Berean Now it’s the next generation. More expensive daycare now. Ipad and cellphones replace the tv.

This 👏👏👏👏👏💯

I don't think you understand how much work taking care of a child is, as evidenced by your opinion that she "should be helping out".

@@jeannedarc5351 Exactly!

She married him and got knocked up so he can pay off her student loans.

Motherhood and fatherhood are not roles or jobs that can be reversed

Who said she’s cooking and cleaning?

Yup he should cook, clean, change diapers, run errands, work out and still have energy for s*x at the end of the day and see how he feel? 😉

LOL! I was watching Brady Bunch after school and couldn’t care less that my mom wouldn’t be home until 5:00. It was a peaceful time. 😊

That's a fact.. but you cannot say that...

@@NaNa-lt1po Boiiii I just did~

Imagine if Dave had a calculation to determine if the wife should get a job. That would settle a lot, although some people just don’t want a job on top of parenting. It’s not for the weak, that’s for sure. 💪

Staying home lol

It’s Making sure the house is cleaned up and having the food ready

Simple: What this woman is already doing. Staying at home with the baby and taking care of the household.

Birthing a child and taking proper care of it by being the primary caregiver. If all things are favorable (child is doing well and is able to adjust, house is well organized), then going to work.

I suppose I am “stupid” because I stayed home with our children. I have a Master’s Degree in Education. I used my degree to nurture our children. I used my degree to teach them to love reading, math, and science before they started kindergarten. I used my time wisely with them to teach them about Jesus. I used my intellect and education as a volunteer at their school. I used my God given talent and degrees to teach at our church: children, youth, and women’s Bible Studies. I also help write curriculum for our middle schoolers. As you so eloquently stated, it’s that “wasted degree” being put to use there because I was EDUCATED how to teach. I use my degree as a ways and means to volunteer in under privileged schools. Teachers rely on me to come in and give their students a little extra help. I was fortunate that my parents and scholarships paid for every penny of my education. My children are now grown. One is a teacher of special needs children. The other just graduated from University and is going to use her business degree in the mission field. In the economic world, my life has probably been completely wasted because I only earned an income for seven years. I’m so grateful to have a husband who has lifted me up and reminded me of the greater purpose when I start to believe the myth you perpetuate. My treasure is in heaven, not in worldly gains.

And give up her current job of taking care of the kid?

@@johnSmith-uz8nl she can do both

@@blackbutterfly233ify SURE and the husband can also get a second job. WHY DON'T YOU SAY THAT?

@@johnSmith-uz8nl troll

@@BAD_GRIM And that is your response... nice and stupid. My opinion will not change and it is not trolling.

What stuff can she sell online?

And hire a baby sister so she has time for this. NICE.

@@subjecttochrist crafts, items in the home they don't need, browse garage sales locally, so many options.

@@gregoryking4796 that’s interesting! I thought you were gonna say, Amazon reseller

@@gregoryking4796 You know that’s not going to happen.

Yes.