Sleeping At Last - "Nine" (Official Lyric Video) 

"How do I forgive myself for losing so much time?" THAT HIT HARD

the line “I have been sleepwalking since I was 14” hits hard. I’ve been suicidal for the entirety of my teenage years, and now that I’m about to graduate and move onto the next big thing, I realize that I never actually planned on making it this far. But no matter what, I’ve got to keep going, after all, how else am I going to fall in love “again and again and again?”

"To know and love ourselves and others well is the most difficult and meaningful work we'll ever do."

the nines, broken dreamers, hopeless beautiful and strong people, we can do this, i´m proud of you all, hugs

To all my fellow 9s going through a tough time just know, "there's so much worth fighting for. You'll see"

I've never felt like a nine until i heard this song. the part about losing time really hits hard. I'm so afraid of growing up and losing opportunities, but i'm I'm also too afraid to do anything about it.

This made me cry, as a nine, I’ve never actually felt like myself. Most of my life is just me trying to prove others that I’m worthy and pleasing them. I don’t really know who I even am.

My good friend, who is a 2, had me take an enneagram test and listen to the song that corresponded immediately. We were in a rather public place and I started to cry halfway through this song. She was on her phone and I didn't want to draw any attention to myself or bother her so I just stayed silent until she looked over at me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. I don't think anything better describes a 2 and 9 relationship quite like that and I'll forever be grateful for her

I think the most meaningful part for me was "I've been less than half myself for more than half my life." My depression makes it difficult for me to really be there in the moment. I'm just existing, not really feeling. But recently.... I'm getting better. Very slowly, but better. And I'm falling in love again and again and again. I'm relearning to love the blue sky, the colorful flowers, and even myself. I feel like the black and white is fading away, revealing a million colors I've never known.

I swear these nine songs have the best comment sections of all time. People realising they are being felt and understood and not alone by themselves ❤ so wholesome and beautiful :')

"Wake up. Roll up your sleeves. Stand up. Fall in love again. Wage war on gravity. There's so much worth fighting for." I cling and hold on to these words. Your songs just break me down to my core.

“Another Domino falls either way...” I love that line. I’m learning about myself and figuring out what that means. I’ve found myself saying “life will go on no matter what I do, so I might as well take a chance”, and I feel like that line is so profoundly simple. We can fight to know and love ourselves and those around us, or we can stay asleep. Life goes on either way. Why not try?

the number nine was the first tattoo i got. this song helped me stop being suicidal. I made it a whole nine months without cutting when I got it. Ten months going strong. :) Edit: thank you so much for the love and support. Now 19 months going strong :)

To my nines out there... we’ll be okay ♥️

“it’s uncomfortable but right” Sometimes it’s hard for me to realize that I grow the most when I’m out of my comfort zone - taking action towards finding myself and feeling like “me”, whatever that is. As a nine, I didn’t fully relate until that lyric came up.

I don’t know who I am. Sometimes, I feel like I’m just trying so hard to make others happy. Yes, it succeeded. Almost everyone likes me, my personality, my emotions. And until that one time, one of my childhood friend asks me,” Have you forgot who you were already?” Right. Who am I? After primary school I changed a lot. I stopped to be selfish, but selfless. I’ve learnt to smile every time. I’ve learnt to make myself more outgoing even I’m just a fucking introvert. I got friends. A lot of friends. From my own class to social network, and it turns out I’m lost in the abyss. Who am I? Am I just another clown? Probably. I’ve lost my feelings, I can’t feel much pain or sadness or even happiness. I know to survive, I must stay positive and happy and always laugh. But the original side of mine had lost. I’ve forgot who I am. The only thing I remember is my dream of being a doctor. It’s fucking hard. I procrastinate I’m lazy and I’m trying so hard to change. My mother always said I used to be so hardworking, and now I’m just stuck. I listened to motivational songs or TED talks but I just can’t find my booster. I guess I’ll just keep on going. With a soulless mind and a fragile dream. It was hard for me to stay focus on something for more than 3hrs, but I guess I’ll have to keep on going and become a doctor just to find myself back. Wish me luck.

To the person who's reading this, You are loved, You are worthy... And greater things await you. I am rooting for you. You will overcome. I love you. Talk. Communicate. Reach out. You are not alone. We are with you.

It was so hard coming to the realization that I'm a nine. Every time I took the test I would keep getting different answers because I didn't know which choice to choose. It just felt like every side of the decision was valid, and I think that is one thing that characterizes a nine. I think nines have trouble seeing the choice that reflects them and instead look through others to make decisions about themselves. Hope other nines had a similar experience.

The best part is from 00:00 to 05:21

This has made me realize again that... I don't have a strong identity. I don't have strong opinions. I feel like a blurry picture of a person rather than a true one right now and it scares me but I don't know what to do. How do I make real connections with people? How do I strengthen friendships? How do I speak out or speak up? Why don't I have any plans for the future, other than a vague idea of a job. Getting stronger in my faith has helped a bit, but I have a hard time strengthening that too. I'm struggling more than I like to think about and it terrifies me

“wage war on gravity” felt like a reference to pluto, “the heaviness in my heart belongs to gravity,” which fits because it’s the ninth planet.

They always make me cry. Especially with "It looks like empathy to understand all sides, I'm just trying to find myself through someone else's eyes" I remember when this song first came out, I stayed up so late to listen to it when it was released. I'm a 945.

I literally got goosebumps at the "i realize i've been less than half myself for more than half my life". I always try to be nice, be kind and be friendly to others because I have a big fear is that I may hurt someone because of my words and actions. It works somehow. People like me for being nice all the time. But I'm just so "human", I judge, I hate, I'm very mean inside. My true self is far from being that nice. And because all of my energy is used for pretending, I'm drained out and empty at the end of the day. How bitter it is, while trying to be the girl that everyone would love, I've turned into a person I really hate. A short message for Sleeping at last: There are some artists that I'm really thankful for their existence, and you are one of them. I love your songs not just because of the words, the melody, but also because your music could heal. Please keep up your good work, I wish you all the best.

The "it looks like empathy[...] But I'm just trying to find myself through someone else's eyes" Hits hard

A very good friend of mine is a 9 (Im a 2). He has had problems with identity and knowing who he is for a long time. So, imma say what I said to him: Stop trying to be me. stop trying to be someone else. you're you, and that's beautiful. i don't care how many times you tripped, i care about how you tripped, not someone else. you're you, and that is so amazing and powerful. you're the best you you can be. and dont ever forget who you are. whoever is reading this, i pray that you are safe and in good health.

I’m a 2 but most of the people I love most in this world are 9s. If you are a 9, know that you matter. Your voice and thoughts are valued and you are so precious just as you are. Thank you for being a safe place for us to land, but don’t do it at the expense of who you are. The world is better because you are in it ❤

Lyrics: who am i to say what any of this means- i have been sleepwalking since i was fourteen. now as i write my song, i retrace my steps. honestly, it’s easier to let myself forget. still, i check my vital signs. choked up, i realize i’ve been less than half myself for more than half my life. wake up. fall in love again, wage war on gravity. there’s so much worth fighting for. you’ll see. another domino falls either way. it looks like empathy, to understand all sides, but i’m just trying to find myself through someone else’s eyes. so please show me what to do to restart this heart of mine. how do i forgive myself for losing so much time? wake up. roll up your sleeves. there’s a chain reaction in your heart, muscle memory remembering who you are. stand up. fall in love again and again and again. wage war on gravity. there’s so much worth fighting for, you’ll see. another domino falls and another domino falls a little at a time, i feel more alive. i let the scale tip and feel all of it, it’s uncomfortable but right. we were born to try, to see each other through. to know and love ourselves and others well is the most difficult and meaningful work we’ll ever do. I hope everyone finds their comfort today, even just for a little while. You are beautiful and loved exactly as you are.

i was just washing the dishes while this song was blasting in the background and have come into realization that the line, *now as i write my song* *i retrace my steps* *honestly its easier* *to let myself forget* was referring to himself, because apparently Ryan O'Neal is a nine!

I'm also trying to find myself through someone else's eyes

I've never had an aim, a purpose, all I did was was go where I was told to go, do what I've been told to do. I've always reassured myself with the fact that life wasn't long, that I didn't need to strive for anything because I wasn't going to be here for long. But as I'm about to complete uni, with a course that I realized I liked too late, with low grades because I didn't feel the need to achieve anything, I'm ashamed of how asleep I've been. But all that matters is that I'm still here, I'm waking up, im finally feeling that urge in my heart and in my bones to achieve something,even if that is to get my grades as high as I can before I complete and I'm going to do it.Im going to try my best to be something even if I have no idea what that is right now, even if my anxious thoughts tell me I dont have enough time

Anyone else notice the deep breath at 5:15? It's like an "alright, here we go, let's do this..." type of moment that perfectly capstones the end of the song... Love it!

I feel like the personality trait nine is the most misunderstood and know that they are the second choice and has just accepted that now

I feel like I'm always observing myself and molding me to make people happy. But suddenly I realized "I've been less than half myself for more than half my life". I have a problem in expressing my thoughts cuz it just seems like I'm going to bother. But in the middle of it all I feel like I'm not awake, I'm just inside of myself trying to find a way to get out of here. Am I ever going to be me? update (September): So, I started going to therapy and it's been very helpful to me, I'm getting better at expressing myself and not feeling so insecure anymore. Of course there's still days I get anxious and feel all of it again, but not every day, and this is really good! Thank you guys for answering, hope y'all are doing fine.

My fiance and I did the test to figure out our numbers. Im a 2, he is a 9. He almost never shows emotion, and yet this song almost made him cry. His passion died in his 20s. Being medically discharged from the armed forces, then seeing that he wasnt as good at math and science in college as he thought, it was so hard for him... This song has pushed him to try and find a passion again. He said this felt like a motivstional speech that he needed to hear.

I never really believed I was a nine. I took the test and just shrugged it off. Then I hear this. I burst out in tears out of nowhere. I remember being fourteen, walking home from school with an empty mind. Every single day until I am eighteen. And everyday, in every situation and confrontation- even those against me- I just...understand. So my heart breaks twice, for me and for those I am supposed to hate. I always believed my empathy a blessing when owned by someone whole-hearted. But I own half of everything, even my heart, so this gift is a curse instead.

I find it quite fitting that I’m the last type on the enneagram, number 9. Because I always feel like I’m the last choice to everyone else

“It looks like empathy To understand all sides But I'm just trying to find myself Through someone else's eyes” Wow. I just found out what the enneagram was about a month ago and through that I feel like I found a part of me that I didn’t really know was there or I didn’t know how to describe. But this line hits me. I always felt like I was a good person because I was empathetic. I could understand what other feel but now I know that yes I can understand it but subconsciously I have also been trying to figure out my own beliefs and who I am. This song really hit me. I’ve listened to pretty much all of your other songs but this one made me feel understood. I can understand others but I never know if they understand me but you do I guess and thank you.

This song hits me so hard. I'm not a Nine, but this song perfectly encapsulates the numbness I have struggled with throughout my Mom's battle with cancer and since her death

Recently decided to find out which enneagram type I am, purely out of curiosity. Never did I expect to feel both *SO* called out, while simultaneously get so much clarity on things I've always struggled with understanding my whole life. "Still, I check my vital signs. Choked up, I realize I’ve been less than half myself for more than half my life." "It looks like empathy, To understand all sides, But I’m just trying to find myself Through someone else’s eyes." These two hit home. This man, found the words to explain what I've been feeling from a very young age. I spent so much of my younger years molding myself to make others happy, or to fit in to someone else' expectations, that I didn't know who I was. For a long time. Finally, at 21 I decided that I had to give up on "who I was supposed to be" originally, and start anew. Because, so much damage had been done to my self awareness of my identity, that I had no idea where to even begin. I'm 24 now. Doing better, I'm at least aware of my "habits" so I know when I'm doing them and how to try and unlearn them (if possible). I send my best to anyone who reads this ❤

I cried the first time i heard this song. I thought I was over it, but you just made tear up again. There are so many lines that hit really hard. I’ve been sleepwalking since i was fourteen too, just living life on autopilot, letting others make decisions for me. I don’t know how to regain the enthusiasm and energy that I had in childhood, but I know that I want to try. Wake up, stand up, wage war on gravity. Fight for causes I believe in. Change the world for the better, even if it’s just a little. Thank you for all your albums, but this song especially. 💖

Being a 9 and being friend with a toxic friend is really the hardest thing a nine could live since we forgive that person way to much we understand both sides (but the problem is that the toxic friend won't even think about your side so your literally erased when around that person). It was really a hard time for me but I'm out of it now it is still haunting me but I'll make it ill wake up and fall in love again. I hope it never happens to you my friends. Please listen to your feelings 2, not only pleasing others. And you deserve true love

It's hard for me to admit that this song resonates with me most at my deepest core of self. I was in denial after listening to it for the first few times because i believed myself to be a different number, trying to justify being a perceived rarer or cooler number based on my life experiences and choices. Who am i kidding. I procrastinate like crazy, wasting so many years and always feeling like i've not realize my truest potential as a 9. Maybe because i've yet to learn and believe in the power of 9. Anyone on a similar path?

"I'vee been less than half myself for more than half my life" "How do I forgive myself for losing so much time" I haven't realised until recently, how much of my life I've gone through with doubt on my mind. I feel like I've lost a sense of my own individuality trying to please everyone. I'd rather be someone else for others than to be judged for showing who I truly am. I'm so scared of driving everyone away, especially my family and friends who have stuck by my side for all these years. there's always going to be that lingering feeling of doubt in me and I hate how it took me my whole life to figure this out

Thought I was a 4 for a good while. Kept aggressively avoiding reading about 9s because that 'wasn't me'. Thanks for saving me some time.

"I have been sleepwalking since i was 14" and "how do i forgive myself for losing so much time " hit me hard everytime this is how i feel i've been drifting through live with no deatination or meaning . I don't know me anymore .....

"I've been less than half myself for more than half my life" This song has touched my soul deeper than any other has before. This has been my story for years. The lyrics make me feel like it's always worth it to get up again and keep trying

So pretty... Anyone else think that Dodie and SAH should collab? I know they already did on “Four” but that didn’t include Dodie’s vocals. Both of them have a softness and thoughtfulness to their voices. And both of them are under-appreciated artists!

The most underrated singer ever, everyone. Nothing is as harmonious as Sleeping at Last, my favourite singer.

First off, I got to give credit to Kyra Hinton for this art, 'cause it's gorgeous. And to Ryan for this song. It's truly special. I will be 26 this summer and I'm still trying to figure out who I am. I'm a very introspective person and I always felt like I knew myself--my likes, my dislikes, my beliefs, my opinions--but it like there's something I'm missing. Maybe my purpose. I dunno, but I've wasted so much time looking for something--who knows what--and in the process I've lost touch with my heart. This song just speaks to me in ways I don't like to admit... But it's true, I'm always trying to find myself through someone else's eyes. Really, I know I should be trying to see myself through God's eyes.

as a 9 I was already crying half way through it but "a little at a time, i feel more alive. i let the scale tip and feel all of it. it's uncomfortable, but right" really made me sob I'm almost graduating and since I was a child I haven't been able to feel much at all. I hid my emotions from everyone not wanting to cause worry, never voiced it when I felt hurt because it would cause conflict, I dulled myself on purpose so I would be so broken. As of now I'm rarely genuinely happy, although I laugh and joke a lot, I never feel angry because it feels like I'm being a horrible person if I do, and sadness makes me more apathetic than anything. I dont let myself feel, it's scary, complicated, it involves opening up to other people and that terrifies me, so being a shell of a person sounds easier. Everytime I tried to tell that to someone they wouldnt understand (mainly because of my poor communication and expression skills), so hearing it being so clearly put into words really hit different I'm very thankful for this song, it's comforting, healing and encouraging at the same time. I hope all 9s out there have the courage to face life, I do believe we're gonna see that somethings are worth fighting for, including ourselves

The struggle we 9s face every moment.. trying to comprehend our own thought but probably ignore them anyway to follow or be someone else. Why can't it be simple

I have the bad (?) habit of listening to music when I procastinate. I sort of came back full circle today, or maybe I'm just emotional and stressed lol. I discovered the enneagram thanks to these songs, I remember waiting for this song to release and just, not resonating with it as much as the others had done for me. I took, and re-took the online tests, then tried again for good measure, then thought "hm, maybe it'll be better if I learn everything on my own and not let a test decide for me". 9, 7 and 2 were always numbers that got the top scores, and are also the types I relate to the most. What amuses me the most is how much of a 9 I am. So much that I am still a little in denial about it. I've listened to this song, expecting to feel what other people feel when they finally find themselves in their own songs. But I always thought "This isn't me", or precisely: "I don't want this to be me". Thoughts like "There's nothing remarkable in being a 9" "Sevens are pretty similar, maybe I'm just a seven" "2 also fits a lot, but it doesnt click just yet" So yeah, as I write all this, I'm still a little angry at myself for being a 9, we experience a lot of frustration, after all. And being told by websites your type has a tendency to be lazy and disconnected from life hurts a little. But after sobbing my heart out today after listening to this song again I think I finally understand type 9. You still have more than enough time. All these years were not wasted. The big painting that is your life is not finished yet, and you're its artist, so don't drop the paintbrush just yet. You want to do good like 1, you want to love and be loved like 2, achieve and be validated like 3, find yourself like 4, understand the world like 5, be secure and ready for any outcome like 6, seek happiness like 7, be strong and invulnerable like 8. Well, you are a 9. Apparently its common to see a little bit of ourselves in every type. We want peace. I think the definition of said peace is very broad, so I'll leave it up to you to choose what that means for you. But I hope we all find it, especially the one within ourselves. I hope we finally accept the fact that 9 is just as important and unique and special as every other type. And be fully awake to feel it all happen in its entirety. - P.s: I'm still not sure what came over me when writting this. Part of me just wants to keep this all to myself. But I have a soft spot for old stories found in youtube comments. I wonder if I will find this comment years into the future, being a whole different person, but still the same somehow. If you're reading this, I hope you have a fulfilling life

What are even the odds. I was literally listening through the whole set for the first time and then the last uploads?

For those who dont get what the numbers are for, here's the list for each numbers info: One means the reformer Two means the helper Three means the achiever Four means the individualist Five means the investigator Six means the loyalist Seven means the enthusiast Eight means the challenger Nine means the peacemaker

“I’m just trying to find myself through someone else’s eyes” t- that’s me🥺

"I'm just trying to find myself in someone else's eyes" hOLY SHIT, I'VE BEEN CAUGHT

“Remember who you are before the world told you who you should be.”

its the “stand up and fall in love again” “its easier to forget” FOR MEEEE AGH

“i’ve been less than half myself for more than half my life” 🥺 reminds me so much of my grandmother. most selfless woman on earth. so busy taking care of everyone else since she got married 50 years ago that she’s never had the time to ever stop and think “myself, too.” i wish i could give her back all her time.

Your words are killing me. "So show me what to do to restart this heart of mine. How do I forgive myself for losing so much time." My 10 year old son died on January 2nd of this year. He took his last breath while I held him in my arms and told him that I love him. I constantly think could've, would've, should've. I feel guilty that I didn't take him to the doctor soon enough, that he didn't get enough medical attention, that I didn't ask enough questions. Wondering if there was something more I could've done. He was the love of my life. I love and loved him with every fiber of my being. It's hard to love yourself when your heart is in heaven with your son. I will never love myself. Sorry for rambling.

When he broke my heart, I promised myself to never fall in love again, now I know that I have to fall in love again and again and again. Life is too short to stop loving.

Dude, these lyrics! "I've been half myself for more than half my life" "I'm trying to find myself through someone else's eyes"

I just heard of the Enneagram test from Jenn Im like 3 days ago and today I had the "Two" song in my suggested videos. (Thank you youtube for the great suggestions). I liked that song, looking at the comments I was confused "as a two I relate to this so much", I forgot about the Enneagram and was confused what "two" meant. But I found out, and decided to look up the song related to my results. It is this one...This made me cry so hard...I am still tearing up writing this comment. This song really describes how I've been feeling lately... "who am I?", "I have been sleepwalking", "wake up", "How do I forgive myself for losing so much time?". Reading the other comments make me feel even sadder, they describe me exactly...Though they offer some sort of reassurance that I am not alone. I was alright having others tell me what to do and thus having defined goals: school, then somehow I chose a college (though until the last moment I had no idea what I wanted to pursue), master's (choice based on someone else) and it's almost over and I have no idea who I am, what I want to achieve. It's so scary... I keep feeling like I wasted so much time, feeling like I am in a dream from which I just want to wake up. It's so sad that I think no one would understand this feeling if I would try to reach out to my friends/family, so I don't even try to talk about it...I try to be happy, I try to help others to make myself feel fulfilled. It just hits so bad sometimes...I don't wanna give up the fight though, I will keep moving forward. Thank you anyone who shared their story in the comments and made me feel less alone. Anyone feel free to share yours. I hope you have a good day.

This song, this is what made me realize what being a nine actually meant for me. Thank you so much, Ryan! Like I thought I was a five. For a long, long time. When the full album was released I went straight to five. The lyrics were great, and I thought, yeah I can sorta see that, but it didn’t really hit. Felt like just a big 5 stereotype almost. Which almost all five stuff did felt that way to me at the time. Then I just kinda left the album. Cut to about 6 months later. 5 just isn’t sitting right. I decide to look into 9. Everything lights up and makes sense. I finally listen to the album and two lines in… I’m in immediate emotional turmoil. “Who am I to say what any of this means? I have been sleepwalking since I was 14.” Replace 14 with 17 and you’ve captured my life story on two sentences. Utterly incredible. Once again. Thank you for this song of both understanding and hope!

I have found these to be so incredibly relaxing to listen to-for going to sleep, meditating, traveling, reading, doing homework, whatever. I'm a newer fan and can say with confidence that "Sleeping At Last" is one of the most influential bands I've ever come across and that its songs are truly art. It is soul put into music. And right now during quarantine it has been such a blessing to be able to listen to it. It helps take your mind off of all the bad happening, if only for a little while.

Background changing means something beyond ups and downs beyond light and darkness i think it’s how nines (i am one btw) could differ could change could even be mess like that messy tidal wave (i see it that way) like a huge wave of emotions that could turn you upside down but it also mess you again i think that’s my interpretation of “another domino falls “

I've spent over 1200 days in the hospital. 70 surgeries, 23 broken bones, above knee amputation and 4 months in traction in the Burn Unit. I've had to learn over and over. I helped so many throughout my days. I want to be fully loved and love myself. "This song like everyone of Sleeping At Last is a MIRACLE"

I'm a Nine, and this broke me. I listened to it for the first time on the bus ride home from school and just burst into tears. I can't think of the last verse without crying. I feel like something in this song touched something at my core, a part of myself I feel like most people don't ever see. But oh, how I want them to see it. Thank you for giving part of my soul a voice.

“I’ve been less than half myself for than half my life” “There’s so much worth fighting for- you’ll see” “How do I forgive myself for losing so much time?” These words resonate within my being. Thank you for putting into words what I feel so deeply.

God has truly blessed you with the gift of being able to convey, *truly convey*, what I think are some of the deepest, difficult to explain/express emotions within humanity... I've never heard music that does this.. That causes my heart to molt and come out renewed, better, afterwards. Your music is amazing. Thank you.

i’ve been waiting for this. as a nine, i initially couldn’t connect to it well, but since starting to understand and come to terms with myself it’s been hitting deeper and deeper every time i listen. thank you, ryan, for your beautiful music.

I listened to this song for months before I even realized I even was a 9w1. I used it for writing inspiration for a character of mine (which just so happens to be an 8w9 on closer inspection now), but after listening to the podcast episode on Nine, and hearing what type Nines are like and what they often do... it clicked. the conflict avoidance, the hyper sympathy/empathy, the loss of self as the Nine absorbs into others: Every single thing Ryan said clicked with me. I had realized I had done all of it all of the time; and probably since I was 14 as the song says, funnily enough; which equally means I've been "less half myself for more than half my life", given I'm 21. It was honestly a lot to take in; with each Type Nine trait and behaviour described, I saw myself in it more and more. it was almost overwhelming; I felt like I was going to cry, only for it to tell me that the fact I didn't actually cry was a Type Nine behaviour in itself: because Type Nines aren't often in touch with their own emotions since they're always so focused in other's emotions so that they stay out of conflict. It honestly broke me open, and really made me really... find myself, in a way. at the same time though, I'm still showing the more negative behaviours, in retrospect. I can't seem to 'wake up [to myself]' and 'fall in love [with myself] again' as the song says to. to put it one way... Rather than sleepwalking, like the song mentions, it's more like I'm lucid dreaming; aware that I'm asleep, but not actually awake. ... and I don't know how to wake up. I barely even remember what it means to be awake, per the analogy. The dominos are still falling, anyways; and being 'lucid' is probably better than being fully asleep. I'm certainly optimistic about life; I've always been, but even with the map of self-redemption the song outlines, I wouldn't quite call myself the best at navigating it.

A lovely song to shake you awake from lost hope and passivity. Remember, we were all carefree and happy kids once. The sad reality is that as we grow, we tend to lose grip on the things that genuinely made us happy and let societal pressures shape us into something totally indistinguishable from what we truly were. Hence, we start to live "less than half" ourselves "for more than half" our lives, thus falling into all sorts of emotional states that's often misperceived as 'weak'. It's okay to struggle, people. It's human to feel downtrodden on rainy days. Just keep trying, there's nobility and courage in giving your all even if it seems fruitless. It will all add up. You are doing great just by being here.

"oh hey sleeping at last has a song for all of the enneagram types, lets listen to mine- oh cool now i'm crying"

I'm not a 9, but my sweetheart is. We've been together for over 5 years now. I'm a 4w5. I didn't cry when I listened to 4 and 5 songs, but I did when I listen to this one. I thought about him and how I want to hug him so much. I am honored to be only love and how he still shows his appreciation and devotion, over and over again. It seems he's in a good place right now. It's the most beautiful thing, to see a 9 coming alive.

"How do I forgive myself for losing so much time." I don't know how to put myself first in any situation. It could be life or death and I would throw myself under the bus before anyone else because I physically can't. I don't know how. I just sit with the heaviness in my chest and wish things could be different. I don't know how to be authentically myself without losing everyone I love. I don't know how to let myself be who I need to be for me. I've accepted that I will live my life as the person people need me to be, but that doesn't stop it from hurting every time I hear someone call my name. I hope you all find peace with yourselves my fellow 9's Keep waging war on gravity.

I only recently found out the whole type thing from a twitch streamer called wilbursoot and I learnt I was a 9 so I sat a listen to all of the songs and as I got to this one, my one, I've never connected to a song so much. the line "to know and love ourselves and other well, is the most difficult and meaningful work we'll ever do" hit me hard

This song is so achingly beautiful.... It hurts, yet it heals at the same time.

It has taken a lot of time and work, and sometimes I still just want to stay under my covers and cry over myself, but I've finally learned that it's okay to love myself as much as I love others. I matter! We 9s are fantastic in so many ways and I pray that the path you're on is leading you to the same realisation; 9s are equally good as any other number and you're presence on this planet matters as much as anyone elses.

This song makes me cry every time l listen . As a nine this reminder that am find things to fight for taking the time to decide on things small and big and being proud that am doing it and leaning to show grace to my past self that part of lost time working on forgiving myself ooh hurts still

I'M A NINE AND I'M SO SCARED THAT I FOUND MYSELF IN THE WHOLE ASS SONG I'M-

Oh my, the tears are real... You make such amazing song. So much heart and meaning in each one. They truly are masterpieces ❤. I'm grateful the Universe has put such an amazing soul on this planet. Your music will always be held close to my heart. Thank you so much for your music.

I’ve always struggled with what enneagram I am. 9 seems to be a good one for me. I’ve always never really felt like myself, worried about what everyone else thinks and putting their opinions higher than my own, even though I know I shouldn’t. Constantly in a worry If Im actually a good person and what my friends really think about me. Beautiful song. God bless.

I cry every time. I really feel that we are old souls. As type 9, we are practically the "Pisceans" of the enneagram. I really do see every other type within myself and mistyped myself countless times. This quote hit me hard : "to know and love ourselves and others well is the most difficult and meaningful work we'll ever do" ❤I love you all❤

Everyone, feeling lonely, I'm hoping we can make it through this hateful and challenging time. Many human connections are lost because of COVID, and I believe we are more powerful as individuals than we know. We forget how important physical and emotional human ties are.

"It looks like empathy to understand all sides, but I'm just trying to find myself through someone else's eyes." Yes. I have never felt more understood than by this statement. I have tried for so long to meet the needs and desires of everyone around me, almost always before my own. I guess in my mind I thought if I tried hard enough I could be seen as loving enough, kind enough, smart enough, hard working enough--to be loved myself. It's a terrible feeling, to feel you mean less to the people who mean the world to you. And no matter how hard you try, it will never be enough. But then, "waking up", I "realize" (in trying to be someone else for everyone else) "that I've been less than half myself for more than half my life." It's time to learn "my presence matters" in every room I'm in. God made me in his image and that means I am enough.

I LOVE A GOOD CALLOUT EVEN THOUGH IM A WHOLEASS 7

I swear, every time I listen to this song a different part hits me. Like I'll be perfectly fine, then all of a sudden a certain line will just absolutely wreck me and bring me to tears. Last time I listened to this it was, "It looks like empathy, to understand all sides, but I'm just trying to find myself through someone else's eyes." The hardest question I've ever been asked - to which I still haven't found a satisfactory answer - was, "Who are you?" Such a simple question, but my answer in that moment was, "What do you mean?" (Translation: "How do you want me to answer, so I can answer the way you want me to?") This time around I was fine at that part, but I started bawling immediately after: "So please show me what to do, to restart this heart of mine. How do i forgive myself for losing so much time?" For a long time lately, I've been feeling... just numb, for lack of a better word. Like I've been longing desperately to "restart this heart of mine," but that's incredibly difficult to do when I just feel so disconnected from myself like this. I've got ADHD as well, so not only is there the emotional disconnect, there's also the executive dysfunction that makes that resting inertia even harder to break out of. It legitimately feels like a war against gravity sometimes just to even take that first step. An update 8 months later: this time listening it was two lines in particular. The first one was, "There's a chain reaction in your heart, muscle memory, remembering who you are." More and more recently, I've been growing and finding my identity and learning to "fall in love again and again and again." I'm finally starting to feel like I have an answer to that question I mentioned above. Who am I? I'm a child of God. Even just typing that now is tough, but it makes me realize how far I've come and how amazing God's grace has been and continues to be in my life. The second line that got me this time around was, "To love ourselves and others well is the most difficult and meaningful work we'll ever do." Along with finding my identity more and more, I've also been finding what I want to do with my life, something I've struggled with beyond a vague desire to go into ministry in some form. Through various things that have happened in my life I've increasingly found that I've been given a gift of longsuffering and grace under fire, and I've felt myself being led in the direction of biblical counseling as a career. This line speaks directly to that desire and calling.

"another domino falls, either way" honestly this line makes so much sense to me. It doesn't matter what you do because something will always happen, you are always making choices and decisions and it never stops. Even if you stop it doesn't mean others will. And time always passes no matter how much you want to slow down or stop time, time keeps going with or without you.

I'm a five and still I can relate to all of these songs T^T sleeping at last is the best name cuz i easily fall asleep to his songs

Honestly, I did not expect to cry listening to this beautiful song. Did an enneagram test this morning because I've been wondering about it recently, and only listened to this song now. I didn't think that I could relate to the lyrics so much :( Tears just started to fall without me realizing about it lol. I don't know why, but maybe I felt comforted, and it felt like the things that I really needed to hear at the moment. I am not great at expressing my emotions so I do not understand myself all that well haha. I feel like I have been living very passively since I was in high school. I don't have any goal, ambitions or things that I want to pursue and try to achieve. Yet, I keep waking up everyday, but I don't even know why. It felt like I'm looking forward to something, but I don't know what it is. There's that feeling of hope, yet I do know know what I am hoping for. Maybe there's a part of me that is feeling very optimistic. Also, I feel like I have only living for others, because they are important to me but sometimes, I do wonder why I am here. Who am I? What do I want to do? That kind of thing. Sometimes, I am surprised that I am not 17 anymore, but 25. It felt like I haven't been living since then. I feel like all I've been doing is just surviving. How do I get out of the woods?

I remember when Atlas 1 came out and I would wait for each one to come out to listen to it immediately . Ever since he finished the last one I felt complete

What a year to be a Nine, huh? My heart is with all of us, we will make it through. We may be battered and beaten on the other side, but *we will make it* . I love you all, and I promise you things will get better. On a more personal note, this song just... it's always hit home, but now more than ever. I've been dealing with a lot of things coming to a head this year, and man if "how do I forgive myself from losing so much time" doesn't just make me start crying now. I'm currently in the process of dropping out of college, in my 4th year (but still my Junior) no less. I just... can't handle academia right now. I have problems I need official diagnoses and treatment for before I can actually earn a degree. I'm so close, but it's never been further away. I hope I'm not lying to myself when I say that I will be going back to school after I get myself back to what I need to be. ~ a 947(5)

"it looks like empathy to understand all sides, but i'm just trying to find myself in someone else's eyes." this hit hard

I wish I could "wake up".. You know, it hits really hard when you wake up realizing what everyone else has decided for you has fallen apart, and they left you to figure out how to survive it. I don't even know who I am, they decided that for me..

I NEEDED THIS TODAY.

"I've been sleepwalking since I was 14." Oof, I felt that... I love this song so much...I'm a four but out of all the enneagram songs, this one resonates with me the most. It's a beautiful work of art ❤️

"WE WERE BORN TO TRY"... BEAUTIFULL

As someone who just learned of this personality thing.. And took a mini test.. Its opened up so much to me. To understand why I always putnothers before me, never picking true sides in fights and instead I see both sides and see the full story before picking. Why I always had trouble saying my issues to others.. Then I heard this song right now for the first time.. And I've realised.. No joke. I feel this way. I've always written songs since I was 13, lose to the fourteen age, and relate to that one bit.. Sleep walking to me, is a metaphoric phrase saying "I can't go on yet my life says I must" thing. I've never had depression as far as am aware.. But I've always struggled to see a reason I am here other than as a side character in anothers story.. Perhaps this way, I can be the main in my own as I try to learn about what is making me.. Me.. a real person

i feel the most beautiful part of this song starts at 3:18. The voices in the background, the musical composition, the emotion in Ryan's voice....so moving. These songs are one of the very few things that are getting many through these trying times. Thank you, Ryan.