A quote I heard from Iyanla Van Zandt that changed my thinking, “ I forgive myself for believing I should have done better when I didn’t know how”. For you Damona.
I really felt this episode! Black parents be wrong af but lack accountability and will make you suppress your feeling when they hurt you smh. They make you feel like your feelings and opinions don’t matter. They lack empathy too, they can’t do no wrong
Broke up with my child's father, found out I was pregnant, and STILL stayed away. My pregnancy was so peaceful and had no issues. It's true to stay AWAY from narcissistic men idc what your situation is. Best decision God is good.
I applaud you ! I knew I didn’t want to have a baby by my bd , but I stuck beside him . My pregnancy was hell ! My baby came out so tiny bc he couldn’t grow properly from the stress . My son is almost 2 now and my bd still brings negativity to my & my kids life . I just now started to keep my son away from him & keep him and his evil ass away from us .
@@SimplySadeWorld 🥺 this makes me sad to even think about what you went through. Now is the time to let go completely. These men do not care or even put thought into what happens to you or your kid. Cut off all contacts. Your peace is important
This information is SO important. We are not taught to identify these behaviors. I was with a narcissist for 10yrs from 16-26 & only now at 31 did I just begin to unravel what actually happened to me! If young girls can see this & learn this earlier in life it will literally save people from so much abuse & trauma!
Me too! I was married to one for 10 years and it was a living hell. He was physically, financially, & emotionally abusive. I did not educate myself on what he was until the 8th year, once that sunk in, I left and not looking back. Narcs are easily capable of killing you!
2 года назад
Chile!!! Yes, I have the same story! I'm 34 now. 9 year relationship. Started dating at 22 and until ALMOST 31! I was focused on my career. I was to focused to really notice until I got around 28 and started wondering.... Chile, I'm off in my own story now. LOL! Thank you for sharing this! Needed to see it!
What she said about discernment was so true once you learn to identify these behaviors you cannot unlearn it. You start seeing it in different people and you know just how to move around them.
This is the realest video on the internet. IDC. I don't comment on videos, but I needed to hear this from Black women (because too often our abuse is swept under the rug FROM PEOPLE WHO LOOK JUST LIKE US or we are told to move on/get over it with no reflection, no empathy...and hurt people do end up hurting people--everybody needs to be heard/seen and these narcissistic/sociopathic people need to be exposed--thank you). When she says LEAVE, LEAVE YALL. Don't ever let him come back. Don't ask him to come back before he asks to come back (because they always do)... LEAVE. RUN. You will end up MESSED UP if you don't. I wasn't even in a real relationship with mine and the toxicity has opened my eyes (for better and worse) to so many ugly truths in the world. I am now desperately trying to find beauty in humanity and life--I don't even talk to people anymore. Also, share videos like these if someone reaches out to you for help. A woman who was dealing with the same "man" actually put me on to the whistle blower and I am thankful as ever!! Everything she said has been true in my situation--from him being on the down low, to his mommy issues/hate/weird relationship, etc. He could give a d**n about any of his children and it is SICKENING. 0 stars, would not recommend, RUN... and whatever made you enmesh with the foolishness, GET TO KNOW IT...make peace with it ...and then kill it.
I have a BS in Psychology and this was absolutely validating of the horror show experience I had with my ex and his mother. I literally was being bullied by a frown as woman until I refused to talk to be in the same space as her. She was toxic and had a unhealthy relationship with her sons. I’m so thankful more women are talking about this because that Jezebel spirit runs deep in a lot of families.
I started my spiritual journey after getting out a relationship with a narcissist. I did my shadow work and realized I was an empath. It has been a hell of a journey. And I still have a lot healing to do.
The way Mona explained her misunderstanding about exactly what a narcissist is and how we use words we don’t really understand only because we hear them a lot……that gave me chills because she articulated my own thoughts better than I ever could. She’s lowkey a modern day philosopher as much as she’s a comedian.
My fiancé actively protects me from his mother and female family Members. He’s traumatized by them, keeps his distance and advised me early on to do the same
I was advised the same at 19 and he ended up having his mask on very well as if he was different and No, he wasn't.. That was a huge red flag I felt could have helped me go in a different direction if it didn't go over my head
This episode here has showed me how much I have grown and how I am not wrong for the changes I have made in my life! I previously dated a Narcissist and It was a crazy experience but I'm so proud of myself that I got out fast!!! I worked on me and I am very happy with where I am today!!!
My mother is a huge narcissist and has alienated me from her side of the family. This is a great episode cause we do get so much shit for cutting parents off but they deserve it
wow..that's what happened to me too, though my mom has transitioned-I have absolutely zero communication with her side of the family. I haven't talked to any of them in years...YEARS!
I know how you feel! I've have no contact with my mom at all! People will try to guilt trip you into thinking that cutting your parents off is wrong, but it's not! Toxic is TOXIC!!!!
she hit hard with a lot of her statements. literally as i’m watching i’m just like 😳. and so many people i know coming across my mind as she speaks ….just crazy
Wow this was so insightful ! Specially the part where you mentioned “ toxic loyalty “ . I struggle with this deeply with my mother for many many years . Although she loves me , it’s very evident she seeks pleasure in my pain ( words right out of her mouth ) . Thank you Mona for this 🙏🏽❤️.
I'm glad the whistle blower is healing and her therapy is helping people understand what's happening. I think she has a good heart and very genuine. An Empathic Gangster that's treading on these demonic entities. One Love♥️
My son was born without a leg, the disability is called PFFD, it happens from trauma or infection between 4-6 weeks gestation, I was abused really bad during my my first trimester and a part of my second, but the date I will always remember (April 12th 2019) was when I was about 5 weeks pregnant, my babyfather punched me in my stomach and caused me head trauma by repeatedly punching me in my face, I took a picture of the puddle of blood and sent it to his mother and she told me basically it didn’t happen, I didn’t allow him to see the baby so he took me to court, I proved that it wasn’t from my genetics (micro aray test) or my health, now my son is 2 and is displaying autistic symptoms. The judge didn’t believe me at first because I’m a black woman and this man is white and his mother works for the government. Luckily I kept everything that was in writing and pictures of bruises. To be honest, my social media is stalked by him so I shouldn’t even be typing this. I always wanted to start a platform to speak out and relate with other women but I don’t want the drama or disrespect that comes from him.
Sorry you went through that. It is true that abuse will affect a mother and the development of baby in the uterus. Hope you and your baby are doing well now!
@@prosperousk5477 he is doing good other than his disability but he has an appointment soon with a specialist about his developmental delays and the first question asked was if I was abused during my pregnancy, hopefully I can get a doctor to put it in writing that his father is the issue of this
I have my BS in psychology and masters in social work, considering pursuing my doctorate in psychology and just want to say that this was the BEST episode yet. Please have her come back and allow guests to ask her questions.
I agree with having her back on. Keep going for that doctorate! We may need YOU one day, to come back so we can ask YOU questions! Keep pushing, Catie Q
@@damikajones6446 Aw thank you. I work in psychiatry in Baltimore and sometimes get really discouraged from the population that I serve (severe mental illness clients). I needed those words today.
Be cautious about which area you get into for your doctorate in psychology. Make sure YOU are fulfilled in that specialty and it won't bring your mental health down AND it is profitable/employable where you live. I got my PhD in psychology and it has not afforded me much more than what a masters would. Not discouraging your progress, but be wise about it. Weigh the pros and cons for what your goals are and if the economy is setup for that. Having more knowledge is useful but often times, experience does that better and is free, in comparison to getting a degree.
@@ChristinaQueenHeart I appreciate your words of wisdom and advice. My husband is supportive of my goals but only wants me to get my doctorate if we don’t have to take out a huge loan, and I honestly can’t blame him.
I didn’t know I needed this until I got it!! Being raised by a narcissistic mother and coming from a narcissistic family it made me realize I didn’t stand a chance when it comes to the toxic loyalty I have for my mom and battle that I was dealing with! Even recognizing my own narcissistic traits that I have this episode was definitely self reflection for me. Thank you for this💖💖💖💖
Omg. I've been in tears watching this. I've dealt with 2 narcissists... both my baby daddies in different ways. They absolutely abandon the children when you don't want them anymore. I thought i was wrong; thought I was crazy 💪🏽 I needed this. Thank you 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
I think I can speak for myself and other women (and some men) when I say this episode was VERY VERY MUCH NEEDED!!!!!! It came at the PERFECT TIME!!!! So thank you Mona for bringing this beautiful black woman on here to put us all on to game 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
I strongly feel as though spirit brought me to the episode.. i use to skip over it cause im like wtf is a whistleblower But my higher self was always intrigued by the spiritual portion. I just cut off my narc ass ex boyfriend. Any time i expressed my feelings on how he made me feel he would always flip it on me, Always accusing me of cheating but you know how that goes, he was feeling GUILTY Bc thats most likely what he was doing. I had mentally left about a year ago But it feels SO DAMN GOOD to finally allow mysef to be free & physically leave!!!! Everything She said in this video is exactly what he does. Im in my healing process & i know that since i finally closed this karmic cycle that bigger & better blessings are Otw. BRING HER BACK!!!!!! Love you Mona💖💖💖💖
toxicity loyalty/Trauma bond is for sure REAL !!!!!!!! Especially in our community ... it's so sad respectfully! I'm glad ya having this convo because people be acting oblivious to the sht that they be doing to people like yk what you are doing and acting !!! And when ya talk about toxicity in black parents especially the moms!!
Watching this episode really made realize that my ex was a narcissistic man ,and it's mind blowing because I watched this to look out for the signs only to realize I already been through it. So crazy and mind blowing
Wow neeeeeeded this podcast !!! Especially those mothers /sisters who be their cheerleaders instead of telling him when he’s wrong ! Sickening , hold your male relatives accountable.
I’ve dealt w/ a narcissist. Love bombed me & got me into him heavy just to go back & forth between me & his BM. I knew he was a narcissist when I was crying my eyes out & his eyes looked happy. No empathy for me hurting & crying. Get the fuck outta there once you realize it’s a narcissist. They will have you up & down just b/c they wanna see you cry. And your heart will be broken but it’s just a game to them. I pray for his daughter still from time to time & it’s been 4 yrs since I stopped dealing w/ him.
I have a narcissistic mother grandmother and baby dad. I have cut my mother and baby dad off completely! My grandmother I keep at a distance cuz she’s older. But I realized the ppl they were very early on cuz I realized the treatment I received from these ppl wasn’t right. I do believe in generational karma as well. And w me having a daughter now. I refuse to let my daughter receive their karma like I did. Ion let my daughter around them anymore cuz she’s only three months and I have to nip it in the bud now before I get older. My mom played my siblings against me I was the oldest. I be damned if she tries w my own child. Thank you for this!
Same situation. I had to cut grandma off tho because she played me and my sister against each other all of our lives. She is my dad's mother. He's one too. Never was there for us and abusive. Has kids all over the place, one died never even got to meet him. My grandmother would still push a narrative for us to take care of him and be there for him. She's so condescending when she talks to me. You'd think because she's older that she would be different, no She's evil. My spirit cannot take it I want to cuss her out all the time I'd just rather not bother.
I absolutely love this convo! I'm going through this with my mom, sometimes you have to love from afar. Respect she's your mom but you have a right to be happy and not to be held hostage by their insecurities.
This interview was SO INFORMATIVE!! Ladies, pay attention for real! I’m a survivor of a narcissist & it took YEARS to heal from that. And as the SWB said, your discernment go way up & gets stuck and you DO look at folks with spiritual lenses. It’s crazy at first, but I’m so grateful for that gift! ♥️♥️♥️♥️ Mona, I love you & thank you for another great episode! 🥰🥰🥰🥰
Thank you so much for this episode, my partner’s parents are Narcissists and abuse him on a daily, today I sent him this video and this prevented him from committing suicide. Thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️
Hearing these woman talk I appreciate my mother so much really she always tried her best to treat us equal and she worked her as off… like I really seen my mom breaking generational curses in my family like she really raised us different and I really see that shit everyday the more I’m around my family.
This episode spoke to me! My husband's mother (he has no contact with is father) and my father ( my mother died when I was a teen) are both narcissist and have in different ways really tried to hurt out relationship. But we are pulling through and going strong. Keep talking the truth and trying to help women!
@SWB OMG!!!! I am screaming on the inside!!! FYI - I finally picked up the book I was afraid to buy! I have made it to the first page! 🤣 Bless you! I am so proud of you for staying on this! It was a blessing seeing you in Atlanta and I feel like, I can endure!
Been following her for a while!! Found her on RU-vid. She goes off in the way that it’s needed. Nice to see her on this podcast! The point she made about the mothers is spot on!!
This was so insightful. I learned more about narcissists through Chanel's definitive breakdown. Thanks Damona for continually bringing us fire content and laughs!
Can’t believe how bad I needed every part of this episode. Especially the toxic mother portion bc that never is discussed in our community, making ppl going through it feel like outcasts and wrong in some way. Thank you for this!!
I cried and chanted for 35mins prior to watching this episode bc I'm watching my son be an absolutely abusive narcissist. 😔 breaks my heart to watch and as an empath I feel completely responsible for his behavior.
A lot of this was so needed. Having multiple child's mothers or fathers doesn't, by itself, make you a narcissist but I get the point about not caring about having them in order to trap the woman/man and then moving on and doing it again. (and don't come at me, I don't have no baby daddies. I just know it's circumstantial) I pray everyone is loving and healing though.
Mannnn, I needed to hear this. I am truly going through this right now. This makes my heart hurt, but the truth hurts.
2 года назад
Come through set upgrades!!! Hair sitting, Set visually pleasing, Makeup, Outfit, and Nails are right!!! Love you for spreading this message to your platform. Move us ALL into a better headspace. Keep doing what you're doing my love!!!!
I absolutely loved this episode!!! This was very much needed confirmation. Plus how you read Derek for filth when he asked that question, I screamed. Cause yes, the man is the one that wants you and initiates everything in the first place.
Damn this video made me cry 😢 I love her! I really needed to hear 👂🏾 this! I’m going through that right now with family. I am from Sudan 🇸🇸 and all the Africans Parents I know are the worse! You are taught to look the other way and don’t fix anything. Ms. Chanel Jasmin Clark I love you! You are the BEST!! Please bring her BACK!!
WHAT AN AMAZING SHOW! Thank you so much for having such an Amazing Guest! She broke the Narcissist down so freaking well! I Love Love Love your show! Please keep bringing it!
Congratulations 🎈 Mona , this was by far the best guest episode (besides Ari the Don) ever. Not only the guest was great but your interaction with her was fabulous. Your growth is outstanding.
This episode was everythinnnnnng!!!! I LOVE THESE WOMEN!!! The whistle blower was so on point with soooo much. She address things I've been saying and unfortunately I learned my dating a dangerous, full blown narcissist. She even pointed out that the man was down low, something I thought I was the only one who knew. She is definitely in her purpose. God bless this woman and protect her at ALL COSTS!!!
My grandma wanted me to have toxic loyalty to her when she got sick. I did all I could do to help, but decided to stand up for myself and moved out of her house while I was in college. Best thing I could have done for myself.
You guys are touching on good stuff! With the coddling and extra attention aka “SPOILING”.. This is a NEGATIVE word. Anything spoiled means something is harmful, unfit, unsafe to you so as a community and guardians we have to understand the difference of love, affirmation, protection and overcompensating and spoiling
I dated a narcissist and had to learn all about narcissism, I quickly realized my parents are narcissist. Once I realized my parents are narcissist it was a relief, I no longer had to ask myself wtf is wrong with them? I kicked my Mother out of my home after 49 torture filled years of dealing with her insanity. 11 years of her staying in my home. Every day was an argument and a religious rant from her it was utter foolishness. She triangulated my children against each other and she is the sole cause of my anxiety. I kicked her ass out and I don’t care if she lives or die because I’m at peace. Do not feel compelled to deal with your parents 💩 go no contact and live your best life.
I’ve been catching up with Mona’s podcast and I just wanna say this is her gift cause this comes to her naturally. Not once did I see her look at a cue card or anything she just asked what everyone wanted to know ❤️❤️
That totally happened to me. I was invited/univited to the party they threw for him. While she's "inviting" me, he was standing behind me as I sat on the couch signaling for her to stop. I said yes knowing what he was doing to see how it would play out and oh boy did it. They kept pushing me back until the party was over and then he took me for a walk. I knew every step and game he was playing. I let him, them, and her think they played me then flexed out the game. Oh, and she thought she was trying me by reading part of her book to me where she was reading that he was cheating and that she knew. Hallelujah thank you Lord for the gift of discernment. He discarded, I said okay thank you, and ran for my life. I literally moved🤗💞💐
@@SpiritualWhistleblower His mother popped up years later on Facebook to wish me a happy and he even sent me a Facebook friend request that he shares with his new girlfriend. I declined that request. I used to keep in contact with his mother from time to time because her and I used to spend time together when he was in prison. I would take her to dinner and the movies while she battled bone cancer and even cleaned her in the hospital. Last year she invited me over for Christmas Eve and to spend the night but I declined. I guess she thought because I lost my sister I would cave in. Realizing now what I was to them and what I never really was either, I've moved on and blocked her. I always had a little respect for her but I now know. He's now on Instagram showing off his money, lifestyle, and relationship. He's taking shots at me and calling me a roach. I'm just so happy I found you and now understand what I was going through and the terminology to it. This man came into my life while I was 19 and doing my own thing turned it upsidedown and when I stood up for myself he and his whole family set me up to hurt me. I this was long however, I thank you for your time and everything you #spiritualwhistleblower you are amazing. May the peace and protection of the Lord continue to be with you 💞💐
You're like Ghostbusters 🤣🤣🤣 I loved this episode...so real and honest. Keep talking about the hard to speak on topics with no filter Monaaaa!! Great content as usual. But let me say this, this made me LOVE MY MAN EVEN MORE because I was blessed with a good one. I had to say that because we have to celebrate the good ones even tho alot of this resonates on different levels. 💯
Whew… I had to pause this episode and wipe a tear bc of the straight facts being said !! So glad we can hear conversations such as this. I’m in my healing and I def wanna manifest what god has in store for me too !! Love this episode ‘ !
I felt this on a very deep and personal level. I had experienced the toxic mother-in-law, I’ve experienced being love bombed but didn’t realize it until the love stopped. I feel so validated. I’m not sure about the multiple baby daddy thing making a woman a narcissist because, i was in a very abusive marriage where I had to flee for my life with my kids, years later I met someone else and had a child with that man but I am not a narcissist. I can admit when I’m wrong, sincerely apologize and change any hurtful behavior because as someone who has experienced so much pain in life, have no desire to hurt another human being. Other than that part I enjoyed the show and I will definitely be buying her books.