Tara Brach on Anger: Responding, Not Reacting

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Tara Brach on Anger: Responding, Not Reacting (10/25/2017)
Anger is natural, intelligent and necessary for surviving and flourishing. Yet when we are hooked by anger, it causes great personal and collective suffering. This talk explores how to transform patterns of reactivity by bringing a mindful and compassionate attention to the unmet needs that underlie angry reactivity. When we learn how to pause and connect honestly with our inner experience, we are then able to respond to others from our full intelligence and heart.
“Getting angry with another person is like throwing hot coals with bare hands: both people get burned.” Buddha
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With thanks and love, Tara

Опубликовано:

7 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 99

@lslsyt 3 года назад

Just Tara's voice alone, is therapy....

@joannaedwards6325 Год назад

Funny. I have to try and get past her voice and just get the lesson. Not soothing to me. Annoying.

@comunicacionplena5833 2 года назад

Thanks for this lecture. It is a source of healing and inner clarity.

@muireannin09 4 года назад

One of Tara. Brach’s best lectures. Great tools to use “in the moment”! Thank you Tara - once again. 🧘‍♀️🧘‍♀️❤️

@purpleFluke 2 года назад

I couldn't find it Please is there a link?

@Mia-fx4lk 2 года назад

this has made me more calm anger is a human emotion , we will always react but it will not be on purpose if ur happy with ur own self u will be more likely to respond.

@victoriaelledge9837 4 года назад

Thank you. Thank you for your teachings. Your gentle tone of voice us so soothing and soothes my soul.

@davidk3009 5 лет назад

So special to learn from ms Brach! 🙏🏻

@Patricia-ok1cd 6 лет назад

i am so stuck in my trance and cant enjoy anything , depressed ,sad, angry, frustrated, lost to name a few , im afraid so afraid that I will not move away from this .

@elvastaudinger4991 6 лет назад

feel exactly the same.

@nellynel3027 5 лет назад

Listen to her audiobook Radical acceptance. Also look up Veronica Krestow on RU-vid. She’s amazing at helping you tap into your inner world so you can feel joy again. It’s a practice, won’t happen overnight but this has really helped me and my anxiety or feeling like I’m depressed. Hope this helps you too love ❤️

@judys6758 2 года назад

Wonderful to come across this subject matter. Thank you, Tara!

@yogablossom100 3 года назад

Thank you for your generosity and guidance! 💗

@mauraheery8735 2 года назад

Thank you for your soothing words on Responding not Reacting. Special for me .Namaste 🙏

@jacquelinem.2948 3 года назад

People who make promises that they can't keep continuously becomes very tiring... and you do not have to take it.. I had to change my shift in thinking for certain people. It is ok to recognize your feelings (of anger and resentment). How do we work with it is a constant skill.

@menandi5795 Год назад

What specific things helped you make it a skill?

@kslucki 4 года назад

This was a blessing to hear. Thank you. Namaste.

@kristinamorgan9804 6 лет назад

I think this talk was totally meant for me

@olivierntk 6 лет назад

Idiot compassion: "The third near enemy of compassion is idiot compassion. This is when we avoid conflict and protect our good image by being kind when we should definitely say “no.” Compassion doesn’t only imply trying to be good. When we find ourselves in an aggressive relationship, we need to set clear boundaries. The kindest thing we can do for everyone concerned is to know when to say “enough.” Many people use Buddhist ideals to justify self-debasement. In the name of not shutting our heart we let people walk all over us. It is said that in order not to break our vow of compassion we have to learn when to stop aggression and draw the line. There are times when the only way to bring down barriers is to set boundaries."

@blackrocktile5855 6 лет назад

It's not about letting people walk all over us.......if it's an unsafe place one needs to get away if they can from that.....

@kit93 6 лет назад

olivier nguyen I completely agree. Compassion cannot become a weakness whereby others abuse us.

@davidk3009 5 лет назад

👌🏻 this is very helpful!

@hoaha8903 4 года назад

Mindfulness is the key helping us to respond in a harmoniously without hurting self and others. Understanding, forgiving, forgetting of our inner powers including: compassion; tolerance; wisdom and letting go from training the mind will transform anger to loving kindness, happiness and peace. Thank you all friends for your inspiration and wonderful inputs🙏🌼💐🌼🙏

@jettiarts 4 года назад

Acting in compassion protects the practitioner from future rage.

@MrCanigou 6 лет назад

I wish I could retain some if not most of the subtleties weaved in this talk Or let me meet their confirmations with other ways through my life

@SKY-wt2pp 3 года назад

Sometimes I feel so hollow and angry inside....I want to crawl away and hide. It's funny I used to feel whole...now it feels like I am losing my soul. Loss of life ....time fading away. Why do I feel this everyday? Maybe I'll never know..... In this game of life, I must grow.

@b.michaelzimmermann4993 4 года назад

The famous porcupine fable is by Schopenhauer, by the way.

@bluejay2931 3 года назад

Wonderful way to live in meaningful life ,

@michaelmuir5293 2 года назад

...a great survival story...and making wise choices...

@ElaineSimplyEL 4 года назад

Thank you! Bless!

@FaulknerLeanne 4 года назад

Beautiful human being x

@Dagmar3Yoga 4 года назад

Beautiful - your are not your thought, stay in love - my new mantra

@dadyankatayoun1347 4 года назад

Sitting in silence I reconnect scattered pieces... profoundly beautiful

@Sana2024foru 4 года назад

Broken heart makes it even harder. But you have to remember that you're not alone ...🇬🇧

@MeMomWife 3 года назад

This was amazing thank you

@privateuno8897 4 года назад

Yes..... last time I implemented the sacred ''gift'' of righteous anger, I did get my point across and I did get my needs met. Not all anger is bad. Maybe we need more righteous anger and a better understanding of the difference kinds of anger?

@kalosevillinas 3 года назад

Very well said...Alot of these teachings? Well not even the famous gurus could do....

@2000bobita 3 года назад

Thank you, learned so much 🙏😌

@melodyst.claire5389 4 года назад

Your amazing Thank you Namaste 🙏❣

@gayathriganesan67 6 лет назад

Thank you Tara. The quote idiot compassion struck a chord. As always, I feel blessed by your talk.

@rickbarber6211 2 года назад

Wonderful Awarenesses!

@Prija1234 2 года назад

This is so helpful....thanks 🙏🙏🙏

@debbonham9491 Год назад

Thanks Tara! Helpful.

@michaelmuir5293 2 года назад

...pearls, abalone shells, & gold nuggets.. of wisdom...thank you...

@pawelsawicki7003 2 года назад

Amazing ideas

@leopemberton5439 8 месяцев назад

If all else fails count to 3 before reacting unconsiesley this takes practice 💚🙏✌️

@FaulknerLeanne 4 года назад

Loved the John O’donoghue poem at the end ; magic x

@andestropico1305 6 лет назад

ES Bueno conocer alternativas para responder con serenidad, pensando lo que se debe responder.

@leopemberton5439 8 месяцев назад

Taking responsibility for my feelings n life has led to inner freedom compassion n love Let negative feelings ALERT you to your unconsiesse thoughts/habits that are creating the negative feelings and you are no longer a victim or blamer .The truth will set you free n give you peace love n joy Takes practice until it becomes natural n effortless You can go a long way with WILLINGNESS to look within backed up with action /reflection.💚🙏✌️💚

@nellekemeeldijk1766 2 года назад

Thank you

@HolliwoodIsForever 4 года назад

This was a just what I was meant to hear today. Thank you

@susandanielson2119 6 лет назад

Helpful

@carolineoreardon2229 4 года назад

Such sage advice. I got to put into practice today. A game changing experience. Thank you!

@dmichael2697 2 года назад

🙏❤️🙏 ty Tara namaste

@davevillaflor3267 4 года назад

Thank you Tara. Hahaha, always love your jokes 🤗♥️

@angelgirldebbiejo 4 года назад

I used to be the most positive person then menopause happened and so much anger.

@AvitalShtap 3 года назад

Aw, it sounds difficult. I hope that the change was temporary and has stabilized since :) regardless, I hope that you handle anger well in all your moments.

@janicemcgill7082 2 года назад

Me too

@joannaedwards6325 Год назад

There are helpful supplements and vitamins. Ask at your local GNC or Whole Foods. Also eating salmon ev day damps down the anger. Of course meditation. I kind of miss my anger...it was habitual..like a bad friend.

@janicemcgill7082 2 года назад

My oldest daughter thinks she can run our life’s. My husband and I are retired she stop talking to me for two years because we had a falling out all she ever does is point our your faults and we need help yet she doesn’t think she has a problem and this is why I’m watching you because she’s coming next week and she is my trigger

@ButtersCCookie 8 месяцев назад

I hope everything worked out for you. I hate my Dad. It's only because he's a loser. He can't even do prison well. He's a fraud in every sense of the word and remorseless about what he did to his kids. Often kids are angered by parents not being the person they want their kids to be. But that's the point. Real parents want you to be better. Generational rage it seems is because Boomers and after have made the World worse in every facet. There's that underneath, no matter what. I can't help but wonder where and why raise children who are resentful? If they cared and loved you more than peers or fads? How does this happen?

@faithnorks 5 месяцев назад

I understand trust me. I haveca 26 year too old to live in the house, feels entitled. She is a terrible person and my biggest trigger.

@Patricia-ok1cd 6 лет назад

the Tv is on im lost in aguish, someone talks to em im lost in trance, pain, sadness. thoughts over n over in my head. it feels like im insane .

@daniellemullon165 4 года назад

What do you do if someone you love does this to you?

@janicemcgill7082 2 года назад

I do suffer from depression and she did call earlier this week and I spoke on the phone with her and then her father said she was coming out and I freaked because I was so afraid of what was gonna happen when she was going to say what she was going to do and so I’m trying to deal with the anger I feel when she is around. She’s 38 years old I am 69 and my husband is 67 so I’m really happy that my friend sent you this video because I have had high anxiety all week

@deserthighways4095 5 лет назад

If we can keep in mind - that is, to know this in our bones - that life is an illusion, then no reason to fly off the handle. On another note, the philosopher John Paul Sartre insisted that "hell is other people."

@danielm.4346 3 года назад

At ×1.5 speed to 6:57 ... so how soon are some solutions spoken of?

@kalosevillinas 3 года назад

This sounds great..but what do when the other person wont even listen at all? I am responsible for my anger and will sit with ir...But that person wh0 has hirt me so many times..Wont even want to hear anything...What aby do unto others as u wld have done unto u...if that person wont even listen..well i disassociate...

@Patricia-ok1cd 6 лет назад

im a control freak. i listen but how do I take it all in and make it a part of my daily life ???????????

@muireannin09 4 года назад

Patricia Chalmers take the PAUSE every time.

@brendarollins6017 4 года назад

MaryAnne P was

@millstreetteut7835 3 года назад

If you are angry just be angry. Pretty sure there is a reason for it.

@Patricia-ok1cd 6 лет назад

i want my life to be different than as it is !!. people tell me im the only one who can change it !!! thats not what i need to hear.

@margaretbarry4689 4 года назад

It is what you need to hear but certainly not what you WANT to hear

@theressdavanzo2938 4 года назад

Posted teach this in grade school I'm sorry I learned it this late in life

@barbiekalev6188 4 года назад

Who else could change it but you?

@aliciaaskenase4030 3 года назад

In that case we often need a helper, a couselor, a therapist, someone smart, and trained, neutral. I've been in therapy all my life. Now I am learning that there are ways I can cope with my pain, my dissatisfactions, disappointments, etc.. Sometimes it just means getting up and having tea and reading, already I"m not in my head. If I sit still, I will keep thinking, if I just do almost anything, my mind changes. Good luck

@yogablossom100 3 года назад

I wonder then, what would it be helpful in this case?

@Patricia-ok1cd 6 лет назад

I'm angry, I'm stuck, I've lost interest in everything, art, life, no joy, no conversation, gee i am in trouble .....no involvement in life, im existing not living,

@cinmac3 4 года назад

Accepting is very hard, I in that place.

@hoaha8903 4 года назад

You can listen to “Enriching Your Life” taught by Ajahn Brahm (Meditation And Life)💐 Laugh Out Loud And Letting Off From Your Mind, Soul, Body All Kind Of Sufferings💐 Your Best Friend, DAILY PEACE, AUSTRALIA 🌸🌾🌹🎭🇦🇺🎭🌹🌾🌸

@danashannon8234 4 года назад

Me too

@stevecampbell1305 4 года назад

Wow...me too...I think on this every day...which don't help! Tara helps...but still....stuck... no clue

@stevecampbell1305 4 года назад

as Thom Yorke sings..." I'm not living, I'm just killing time..." Sadness

@jeanneelliott7243 2 года назад

🖖❤✌⚘

@sestables 9 месяцев назад

Interestingly enough, the best way for the porcupines to gather closely for warmth, but safely- would be to join in a circle, facing the center. Which means they would have to look eachother in the face, especially when someone gets jostled and wounded and needs a little extra space and validation. The best practice means facing eachother, speaking with authenticity about our needs, and recognizing that others needs are valid too.

@eileendeerdock5820 6 месяцев назад

Dec 22, 2023 - The definition of a PARABLE is a usually short fictitious story that illustrates a moral attitude or a religious principle;😉

@supe7177 4 года назад

Too many manipulative people who are just waiting for a kind heart to come along to step on it.If you forgive once,they will do it again.Too many emotionaly unhealthy people.For example,narcusists can never learn or change.

@barbaraannesmith6896 4 года назад

Either handle the situation or leave. They never change.

@charlenenorman3644 4 года назад

barbara anne smith Unless they want to! I can only hope!

@charlenenorman3644 4 года назад

I can only hope they can and want to! It’s so hard to care about a person that is a narcissist! Guy it hurts! I like what she has to say! Pause, and reflect on my actions. And name it, why I feel so hurt! Rage is horrible! And unhealthy! Right

@coolhluke8089 3 года назад

You talk, I get sleepy.....

@coolhluke8089 3 года назад

Works though. Hard to be angry when your sleeping. ;)

@michaelmuir5293 2 года назад

@@coolhluke8089 ...sounds like my dad..snoring on the sofa...time to retire...

@candaceyoung1759 3 года назад

I am response for the experience I have. I am. I give myself space to feel my feelings and listen to music to feel better. I create boundaries now. I am being harmed. This is hurting. It's the inner weather it is here and feel and move through it. I have a need to feel safe and cared about. Create boundaries. I won't be around you raise your voice. Not have anger take over, but something needs attention inside me. Create space. At my workplace care aids passive aggressive withhold communication from me. The cook is passive aggressive withhold communication for me. Residence's lash out in anger to me a lot. The operator ignores my presence. I leave. I go to a space to feel my feelings hurt, pain and I listen to music to feel good again. It's is such a shame to act like this.