The 20 Year Old Man-Child Epidemic 

can you do a video on men having the mindset that's it not a big deal if they get caught cheating. but if they get cheated on its of course the end of the world. cheating wrong period, dosent matter if your male or female. I've noticed that therapists and coaches have been doing a " it's takes two" kind of approach to this topic. basically coddling the cheater and sending the message to the one who was cheated on that it's also their fault, and they need to figure out what part they played in their partner being unfaithful. I think it's been contributing alot to people having an excuse for lacking integrity. cheating is selfish, entitled, and completly disrespectful to the partner. the damage it causes to all parties involved is being minimized, and blame is being shifted on the ones that are damaged the most. I'd like to hear your opponion on this topic, and any experiences you have or that you have witnessed, and if you have any advice on how to handle situations like this not just for the betrayed partner ( make or female) but for the one who does the betraying by bringing sone awareness to the damage it causes and how it erodes a person's integrity in more places than just a romantic relationship. love your content, your influence on younger generations is desperately needed in this messed up society we have created for ourselves. thank you.

This is a f*cking masterpiece. Thanks Cole

No faith, no identity, no purpose. Compounded by inflated human value/population density stress/"behavioral sink." Technological revolutions also played a role. The agricultural revolution spawned extended families. Industrial revolution, nuclear families. Information/internet revolution, single-parent households. Now we are going through a sort of remote work/gig economy revolution with VR and doordash, everything from schooling to therapy is being done remotely, wars are being fought by drones, etc. Children really have no place in this economic arrangement. The good news is that the arrangement is an unsustainable ponzi scheme. The bad news is that we are pretty much all totally unprepared for the hard work of surviving its collapse and building a new (or perhaps not so new) order afterwards.

You’re a stupid f boy. Nothing significant? How about you try thinking about the over 500k sub RU-vid channel your about to upload a vid too. Your dimshit ass be a disease

Thank you for uploading this. I needed to know if anyone could relate. Did you have any relatives or friends who pushed you down or held you back? 😦

Yes sir.... like one man crew ship sailing the ocean. You can embark with family, friends, or no one at all

Depends on the relationship...people forget that a lot of relationships are simply going through the motions or worse abusive

Either interpretation can be true, and it really comes down to how you frame your mindset and how you choose to view the situation in front of you.

Hell

Taking control, learning how, is the trick. ​@@vrgvhteyghfb3400

Always go back to childhood in this case. I always wanted to be a doctor, politician and musician. Now, I've got my first medical textbook, a violin (a massive childhood dream), and a few books reccommended to me about philosophy and politics (such as Meditations by Marcus Aurelius). Nothing finds that spark of purpose like striving to fulfill your inner child's dreams. Reason finds resolve. Excuses find exits.

I think we're living in pretty hard times (for young adults in particular.) We're presented with the illusion, that anything is possible, we're comparing ourselves to others more due to "social" media. The possibilities seem limitless. The pace of life is too high for us to adapt. Rents are too high, "surviving" is expensive. It has become more difficult to decide on what we really want to do with our lifes. It hardly ever feels good enough. There's always a better choice. You're not weak for feeling how you feel. I feel you, just as so many others.

@@audreydoyle5268 What if you can't remember those Dreams?

Do a business, then get psychotherapist, and with him find what you really want, and with the money you get from the business start doing what you want. Easy as f. All we have to do is do something instead of overthinking and overcomplicating

Do what makes u happy I know it's hard and you don't know right now I don't either but we all in this together I feel you. Sometimes it's better to let the answers come while you focus on day by day

Health and fitness helps anything that gets in the way of that really isn’t worth your time

Here’s something to calm the many directions dilemma, those people are probably not completely sure of what they want. Sure they “seem” to have everything together but you really never know the truth behind anything

Everyone’s too dramatic. Go make money with something practical you enjoy and have hobbies. Done. Military will put you to work if you can’t decide. Easier to be a cop or firefighter after. Nobody with clean running water and internet is “suffering.” Don’t be a sissy.

look up the Paradox of Choice

@@JayBhro I’ve seen that video, interesting perspective for sure. Recently getting out a very structured environment I.e. the military has created this sudden onslaught of possibilities. Making me feel all the more pressure due to the fact that I’m mid 20’s attempting to reboot my life. Thanks for the advice btw.

Oh absolutely man lol

Yes sir truth

Not gonna lie, really feels like it.

Mein Leben

I grew up really poor, and had being living on my own since 17. I'm playing on super mega nightmare mode

Love it,that is a great way to put it. Short,sweet,and to the point

Your children will be slaves sheep 🐑 🤣 wake up

That’s great. I’m guessing that’s why u chose to be a watermelon slice 🍉

it gets easier when you get social security. im 43. once i hit 62. NO MORE!! you think WORKING is bad? FINDING A JOB AND SENDING OUT APPLICATIONS IS EVEN WORSE!!! I DONT WANT TO DO THAT SHIT !!! so either im gonna make big money with crypto or end up living through life until retirement and just kick it till i die. either way, i dgaf

SMH 🤦 stop being a beta simple as that

Welcome to Capitalism in the 21st century

What was different when you were 24? What jumpstarted that run and kept you going back then?

I wasn’t married for a start. My relationship was going well. Career going well. Got married at 28. We broke up at 35. She used me like a workhorse and atm card. I had a miserable marriage towards the end with two kids involved. She didn’t want to be a mum. She didn’t have a job and I was putting in 80 hours a week. we began to fight a lot about the kids and home. so she up and left me with two kids. That pretty much left me in the situation I am now in. Two kids. Work and provide for them and raise them. Ever since then I’ve had to cut back on my hours in order to be more available for my kids. They’re my only purpose now. It’s rewarding but a real struggle. You have zero time for yourself. I love them don’t get me wrong. I’m very bitter towards their impulsive selfish mother who just left to live her own life without any responsibilities. So I am lost and without purpose for myself other than raising my kids on my own. I didn’t want this situation. Did everything society told me to do. Study hard. Get good grades. Get a good job. Raise a family. Now all I do is work and raise them. No time for anything else. It feels like a prison sentence at times. No breaks. No days off. No time to relax just go go go. But my kids are thriving in school and have extracurriculars. It’s not all bad. I love them dearly. Just wish I didn’t have to do it on my own.

I have many things I want to do, just not the motivation to do them... I feel stuck and have no idea how to fix it.

40yr here. It was a good decade plus and then 5yrs of struggle. Things are starting to look up again but it’s like a different chapter now

It's hard to make a living nowdays and the system is rigged 😶

you'd be surpised how many that age are living that way

Can confirm it’s a thing at 41.

Even with everything working against you, it’s not too late to become a new identity. Keep fighting, brother

I am soon to be 33. Time goes by. I lose time thinking instead of taking action. I also feel insecure. This hinders me to change.

I'm in a similar situation as you. I did work a job and I drive. It never really got me anywhere. I'm unemployed now and extremely depressed. I never had any of my social needs met because of autism. You're not alone. I hope you are happy and find success!

It's great that you've given your life meaning outside of other peoples opinions

I'm in a very similar situation. I'm a 20-year-old man who's an aspiring artist, animator, and content creator. Well, I used to have strong aspirations, but I stopped making videos 2 years ago. I just haven't had the motivation for it. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome and ADD when I was 3 years old. I had a pretty decent social life in elementary school, probably because I was attending ESE classes at the time. Once I graduated from elementary, however, I lost contact with my friends, and people started to pick on me for being the _"weird kid"._ That's when I started getting into art, and I used it as an escape. My grades didn't suffer, but I became extremely depressed and separated from reality. I met one close friend in high school who was also autistic, and we bonded because of our similar interests and struggles. She's the one that inspired me to really improve on my art. Then when I was in 11th grade, the pandemic started, and we slowly drifted away from each other. The past 4 years felt like a blur... I can legally drive, but I only recently accrued enough credits to graduate from high school. The system promised me a diploma in the mail, but I'm still waiting on it. My parents won't help me get a job until I receive the diploma, so for the moment I'm just kinda stuck. Once I get my diploma, my plan is to get a basic job and save up money to move out of my parent's house, but the world's looking really bleak right now, so I'm not sure how far I'll get. I'm in a very confusing situation right now. Someday I hope to be fully independent. I'm glad you didn't let the world stomp out your dreams and you went as far with them as you did. You have a very strong will. Just wanna let you know that you're not alone in your struggles. :)

i believe everyone has a unique path, there’s no right path or wrong one just your very own!

Ya same.. I have great life until Jan 29 hit and I got schizophrenia. It all turn downhill.. I gain weight and unemployment.

Excellent realisation and me too bro. Also, he said contentment. Contempt changes the meaning of the whole thing.

Yeah, I said contentment. But detachment is powerful. Truthfully, I’ve given up on the idea of giving up desires and detaching fully. I know desire is the cause of my suffering, but I choose to desire anyway. I like having things to work toward. Though the things you said one should detach from are really good

@@ColeHastingsHanging out with friends will get rid of your desires. As long ad you don’t drink

@@ColeHastings I like this. I think it's always about balance between desire and detachment. If we always desire, we will never be satisfied. If we are always detached, we will also never be satisfied, because we'd just be programmed to do things without imagination or wonder. Desire is like the fire that sparks us to wonder, take action and gives us direction, while detachment from the outcome will help us be more present and focus on the process. This will help us decide if our desires are fulfilling or not.

@@diamondminerx000 very well said!

It's always time for jazz, whether it's over or not

jazz :)

What's Jazz? :/

"You like jazz? "

yall gotta step up and be a man you genuinely have your whole life ahead of you saying it’s over 🤦🏽‍♂️😭

Soyciety

It also largely depends on connections and luck. My life was much the same as yours, busting my ass only to get fucked by the companies because some lazy fuckhole co-worker had better connections and was liked by my boss. I now have a pretty nice job I like, but I won't bust my back for anyone anymore.

It's all about who daddy knows or owns

I too felt this way until I found the power of budgeting and discipline. If you can learn to practice delayed satisfaction and minimalisms then you can build a foundation that will build a much more free life

I wonder why more people don't have the mindset of "Anything that keeps me down, I will bring it down."

@derekgriffin8151What a great way to look at things man! ❤

I'm 59 in a few days but have always felt 25 mentally

Simp smh 🤦

@@keithparker1346that’s good, stay young as long as possible, have fun

I wish I had this knowledge during My 20's

@@ogvelociraptor205 Don't stress it bro, im 31 lol

its all fun and games till you hit 40. but that is 15 years away for you. in 15 years AI will be in every facet of society. you might be unemployed forever. who knows. will see.

Top 3 best games of all time

@@ColeHastings Minesweeper and GTA3.

Hey there! That is okay, you know what will help? Slowly detach. Step by step. Start a new job, earn your own money. Work out a little bit, start once a week. And if you can, start reading once a week. And slowly level that up. Thats the obly thing that really helps, no nees to turn around 180 degrees all at once! Youll get there eventually man :)

⁠@@G73Serveryeah get a job and work all your life away just trying to afford basic needs like food and water.

@@LIVEMETRIX187 bruh im an anti capitalist who are you telling this, but just being at home earning no money is worse than jobbing a bit

@@G73Serveralso I would say that one should restrict oneself to a traditional job if it’s not one’s thing, today is much more flexible than in living memory

@@MysteriousFuture wdym traditional job and why?

Ur so young man I promise u got so much time

Finding a job at 18 is a great start, I didn't find a job till I was around 20 cause I was depressed and didn't want to do anything. Its led to me not knowing a lot of adult things when I should, but I'm learning, it gets easier even from a late start. You're doing it at the proper time so don't stress about it.

@@NoahWoodard-dn3kv starting at 20 isn’t late lol

@@Tony99_xx_ I literally didn't do anything for like 3 years or even attempt to, so yes I was still young, but was late on actually doing anything

Makes me so happy to hear that. That’s always the goal. Thank you for watching

Real

I agree that it's like a rigged game and easier for certain people, but we don't have to blindly accept it. We can fight against it and try to rewrite the rules.

@@aurora_skye Also real. I actually have alot of hope in future generations when they get into positions of power

⁠@@ColeHastingsAgreed.

Yes, after 7 years hard work and self improvement, fittness, diet, hard work, investment, earn a lot money, got fit, lost the dicipline and motivation. I back again now. I more and more bieleve in free will

Thank you

If your in college your cooked buddy

How so? If you dare chastise me, I will find you! @@andypope9222

@@andypope9222keep you negativity to yourself buddy

@@morpheus_circuit university’s are scams

Not a hickey

I read the spectrum of gayness 😭😭✨

I think people are piggybacking on others genius, but in reality they forget to be authentic and hence can't make genius thoughts on a regular basis hence if u see Einstein he was very alone and focused all on physics, if u live what u wanna be the rules come to you naturaly . People lack the wisdom to be genius all the time hence being a God like buddha is the fittest way to live, we all believe that nature is genius hence it will live and take out the fact that a astriod can wipe it out no matter thc genius of nature hence buddha transended all of that by detaching and acceptting all that is this moment because if u are alive you have a chance to be a God alive = god if people understand this we all can start producing our own authentic life it is not hinging on genius systems like social media, people have understood this but they don't practice it because they think they don't have time but without this what are they doing they don't realise this, if everyone realise this everyone will behave more concerned about their own genius life, it takes time to be genius hence start with the only state of achieving it by being a God

Find something worth desiring

oooooh,that's the most interesting part about the problem

Who's asking?

Why do you want to improve in the first place. It is good to be free from desire as desire is the cause of suffering though you say I do not have desire though you do in the natural survival sense which is all u need

U only need to desire in the moment. You hungry u eat, u tired u sleep. Life is simple, people's egos make it complicated.

He just have lost at least one, the overthinking and overcomplication in his attitude is just depressing for me personally.

Find a woman you can tolerate and establish dominance early. I'm a single 40 year old man child and my father is a pushover for my mom. Learn. Adapt. Overcome.

Glad it resonated!

Which trade do you recommend, and is this video unhealthy

@imgonakickurass72 26

first time I've ever seen someone say that lol

_Everyone has talent at twenty-five. The difficulty is to have it at fifty._ ― Edgar Degas.

I don't. I was kind of an idiot 10 years ago lol.

i wish i was 18 again

I now regret taking a hiatus from completing my tertiary studies, I could've dodged most of the mess right now that got kick started by a certain virus, but at that time I was so tired and burnt out from high school and college that I couldn't keep pushing on. Things just don't work out for weak people like me, no loving partner, struggling at my studies and can't even get an internship let alone an actual job.

I looked at my audience demographics 🫣

@ColeHastings funny, esp considering youtube is horrible when it comes to recommending me content im interested in

Same lol

It's not you man, it's the gals. They're overwhelmingly materialistic, they choose jerks over loyal men, and get laid every Sunday. It's not about "how do I attract the good girls?", it's "how can I avoid the bad ones?" I don't even bother trying to spark a conversation with the opposite sex, cause I'm 90% sure I'll get ghosted for some Tik-tok hotshot who will leave her for the next-best body. And even if I run into a girl that isn't promiscuous, she'll be typing away on her phone while we're at a restaurant. I'm not even 30, but I feel like a boomer at this point.

Trust me around half those relationships are NOT happy and more likely running on empty with no one leaving because they are scared to find someone else

Yah bro they are not happy they just show the happy side on the net 💀

Don’t feel bad dude.. I gave up when i realized my reality was catheterizing myself everyday emptying out bags of urine night & day living on social security disability so it’s like how can i get myself out of the situation that I’m in realistically? I barely get sleep because of my medical condition & when i do get sleep, they’re mostly nightmares dealing with cptsd as well. There’s billions of us living on this planet… never feel alone in this.

@@keithparker1346You can’t certainly know. You can only assume.

Real recognize real

really appreciate that cause i really enjoyed making it

Thank you

That is bluepiller logic.