I know, like I have to live with one foot in the fifties and another in the 2020s while you get to park your behind all in the modern era, both asscheeks and everything.
@@MatthewJarvis-zw2sz "He wants all the benefits" reminds me a french expression : "he wants the butter, the butter's money and the butt of the butter's lady (the lady who makes the butter) " 😅 Basically : he wants everything without doing any effort to get it.
It's so annoying when they constantly talk about how men are career fields a lot more, and build infrastructure its like.... for thousands of years you said that's mens work. Now you're shaming women because there's not many of them in those fields. Wtf do you want.
And yet it is the dominant structure in modern American life :( Even women who are the primary or sole source of income do more housework on average! It’s a barrier to gender equality just as large as the wage gap, but so much more difficult to address- how would domestic labor laws be enforced?
@legrandfromage9682 Sorry not all of us want to eat off moldy dishes and sit in shit on the toilet seat lmao. Most women are just asking for the bare minimum, like load the dishwasher, help fold communal laundry, clean up after yourself.
@@legrandfromage9682 I promise you if women were less 'neurotic' about housework (most) men live in absolute filth and think it's completely fine, which it's not.
Don't forget the "So you expect me to work and pay all the bills while you get to sit at home all day?? What are you, a golddigger?” as if that's not exactly what they wanted their "trad wives" to do in the first place. Must be fun to pretend the house becomes spotless and dinner gets magically cooked on its own!
@@Jamesxx15 that’s kind of the point of the video. As soon as this type of guy is faced with trad husband responsibilities (like working to support the family on only their income), they backtrack on wanting trad wives/households
People that demanding other to fit in their view, but never want to fit in other view. It remind me to people who always moaning about "we need more of this kind person in the world" but never try to be one themself. I definitely not talking about my coworker.@@dancingpixies93
@@dancingpixies93My wife makes more than me. I'm scared of her losing her income, lol. Some dishes and a couple hours with the baby (what a terrible curse, to spend time with our own child! lol) is but a small, small price to pay. Apparently, people have interpreted this comment as meaning that I'm scared of my wife leaving. I joked about her making more than me, that doesn't mean I think she'll leave. Maybe I should have clarified that better?
@@tiagodecastro2929 spending time with your own child? What are you, a babysitter?! (obv joking lol, you two clearly have a very practical marriage and make decisions based on common sense)
Reminds me of when my college boyfriend asked me why I never did the dishes. I told him I did, he just wasn't usually home when I did them, which was true. Then I asked him why he never cleaned the bathroom, and he said "Because that's your area." I had an 'area.' He didn't.
@@DeathnoteBB Why the object permanence issues? My last ex claimed he couldn't find me if I took a phone call in the bedroom of our very tiny apartment. I'm like dude, how do you completely lose a full grown woman because the door closes? The only reason I was going in there to talk in the first place was because he hated the noise of the conversation taking place in the same room as him. Like, you asked for this, how can this be a surprise? Suddenly you have no idea where I went? BS. I'd worry about his intelligence, but he's someone else's problem now.
When my parents got married in the 80's my dad went into it having these kind of expectations of my mom. One day she grabbed a piece of paper and started writing. He asked what she was doing and she said "I'm writing up my resignation since you want me to work full time at home." That one fixed that!
I'm so glad, in retrospect, that I grew up in a household with a father who also helped around the house and with childcare since my mother worked as well. That's probably why they're still happily married after 47 years.
@@AngryReptileKeeperSame, my grandparents were baby boomers and they split housework and taking of the kids (and later me) equally. They had the happiest marriage I've ever witnessed, and I didn't realise how rare that was until I got older
Sooo many men want a bangmaid who also works full time so she can pay half the bills. It's always the laziest dudes in the world that behave like this, too. Ugh.
Same type of guy where if he made enough to actually have a wife who stays home taking care of the house for him, he’d be complaining how she’s a lazy leech with no job.
I once dated a girl who came from a relatively (for our area) wealthy circle. She was cool, her parents were pretty cool, but her parents' friends were unbearable. One of the women never worked a day in her life and constantly complained about lazy people who just want a free meal ticket. She contracted almost everything out to maids, child care, etc. Her days were spent "working" on her passions, like painting ugly dog portraits or playing socialite.
@@andrewhooper7603 lol I love how it’s so often either people who have never worked a day in their lives or only have had privileged, well-connected cushy jobs who say this. Especially when they had to marry their way into wealth and didn’t come from much themselves. Like ma’am, you are just as much of a grifter/ social climber as these people you’re insulting 😂
Honestly if I could support me and a partner with my job and she would literally handle all the house (except maybe cooking because I like to do that...and things that are more strenuous for someone weaker like carrying heavy things) duties, ESPECIALLY cleaning then I'd be more than happy to just come home from work and chill out. I can't stand work that I perceive as being preparation. Even when cooking, prepping everything suuuuucks I just wanna DO.
Yeah, it doesn't stop with this either. When my husband retired(I retired before him so I did much of the housework) I told him he would be splitting the housework now. He told me he wanted to enjoy his retirement! and not do any work! I asked him when I was going to be able to retire?? His brain practically melted, but he managed to see my point.
What's sad is that you even had to point this out. The older I get and the more I see, the more I think that men in general have been too spoiled for too long.
@@AngryReptileKeeper I wish I hadn't either. but he saw the light when pointed out. We're Boomers. My generation is better than those before, at least a bit. My mom didn't even try to convince her husband to do housework. His share was to take out the trash.
When my dad told my SAH mom he was going to retire from the military at 55, mom replied she was going to retire too. Dads reply of ‘retire from what?’ was not the correct retort. After this conversation I was shocked to see him making breakfast for the two of them EVERY morning and cleaning up everything after dinner (mom was a very messy cook - seemed to dirty every dish and pot they owned that was never put away!). And they had a housekeeper in every week. Didn’t hurt him a bit. He turned 99 last week!
@@jtl-en4yx Women suffer financially more than men post-divorce; judges can be sexist, too. The primary earner has to pay alimony (in rulings with fair judges) bc the labor at home went unpaid. This prevents secondary earners (usually women) from living in even more poverty than they statistically do already.
"I don't want to get into all the ways I'm just now realizing my argument is full of holes, so let's just move on under the assumption that I'm right."
Dog these kinds of people could be making six figures and they'll still just be emotionally stunted manchildren. If it isn't their wife's income triggering their insecurity, it will be something else.
@@umani9983yeah, that's the core issue. Their mother treated them way too well and they search for someone that is like that but fail to realize that their mother literally sacrificed herself for them, which is an unhealthy relationship. Not only for a normal relationship but also for a parent. There always need to be some borders so the other person realizes you're a human and not just an extension of their needs
My own father did the dishes when he came home AND took the time to play with us kids individually. He was a wonderful husband to my mother and a great father. We fought tooth and nail for him to live peacefully with us after being diagnosed with ALS
@@WisdomAndWar133 I'm sure people don't regularly get diagnosed with ALS. Randomly saying "Bad stuff happens to everyone" does not work here. It's an understatement. 😶
If he were living alone, he'd have 1 income & have to cook, shop, clean, organize, plan etc. all for himself. These are *adulting* skills, not gendered ones. With 2 incomes, 2 adults, the household labor needs to be split equally. Add a kid in the mix and suddenly there's 24/7 childcare that needs splitting, too.
They want the wife to be both traditional and non traditional, only when it benefits him. And so he does nothing Ladies, time to take a solo vacation and see how he handles everything. Then pack up and leave if he’s still not contributing
If my boyfriend ever pulled a stunt like this (which he wouldn't, thankfully), I'd take off and visit my parents across the country for a solid month. Since I'm on disability, I'm in a position where I can just drop everything and f*ck off while maintaining an income. Then he could go to work for 13 hours a day, come home and take care of the (large) garden, the yard, the 13 chickens, the 4 cats, the cooking, the cleaning, the laundry and the errands by himself. Meanwhile, I'd be chilling at my parents' place doing a fat load of nothing. And I'd better not come home to a disaster and a garden full of dead plants.
Also, some people don't understand that an 8h workday is not the same as 24h/7days a week housework and kids. So even when a husband works, and the wife doesn't and stays home, he still should help with some chores.
Exactly! Plus you always should be a real dad when you have kids. Not only to support your wife but mostly for your kids. Kids need a dad who is truly involved.
Yess!! I'm a student and end up staying at home during breaks from school, including summer. I got a really great husband who takes our son on his days off and in the morning so I can get a break. Obviously I give him time to himself as well, it's give and take. But the biggest thing is that he gets a change of pace. I don't. And I hate being a stay-at-home. He loves his job. So we talked and decided it was important for him to help me out. Because there was a time it was all me 24/7, no breaks, no days off, and I actually became extremely mentally ill to a very concerning point. People don't get that stay-at-home moms almost never get time to themselves. Every day at all hours we are taking care of and living for others. That is hard!
@@anonomous8649 It sounds very hard to keep it together when "on call" constantly, especially with nobody but kids to talk to. I think anyone would suffer like that. I'm glad your husband stepped up like they all should and hope your schooling is going well!
@@anonomous8649 I think more people need to be aware of the "on-call" expectations of motherhood. You never fully get to relax, and when you look at labor laws ~ they address that interrupted breaks need to be paid accordingly, and with additional time off in certain cases. It is not responsible to have a single person on call 24/7 for ANYTHING, let alone caring for a small helpless human(s).
@@kinseylise8595 Yes, it can be very mentally draining to be with the "brain damaged" little ones day in and day out with very little time with other adults. Then add in another demanding to be served adult to the mix. It's no wonder why one partner is upset enough not to want to be "close" to the other. Having "relations" with someone you are mad at is emotionally unhealthy.
Yeah my mom and all of her sisters had this kind of husband too, my mom like most woman worked and took care of us and the house it was depressing to see growing up because i am a girl too and i tought i had to have that future of a slave but i decided i will forever be single to rather do everything for a guy
@bettybunbun9664 If she works full time you know damn well her money is "their " money and his money is "his " money...video games, golf, boys' weekends, whatever. I've seen a lot of divorces because of that shit.
I never dated anyone like this, but i had a roommate who treated his gf like this (he groomed her btw). And then he tried to pull it with me (he told my bf he needed to control his woman, referring to me), mind you I’m usually not confrontational, I used to be timid and he _tried_ to take advantage of that. Acting passive aggressive and bossy (wanting me to clean dishes not of my making) and what not. I told my boyfriend not to interfere because it was my business to deal with and one day I just snapped and blew up on him, calling him all sorts of things. He never did it again to me and he moved out shortly after. All it took was standing up for myself a single time. I am not a straight woman who just settles for any fragile man who sometimes treats me like a person, and I certainly would never be in a relationship with a lazy weasel, and I will definitely never be a mouse again towards men like that. And am no longer afraid of (metaphorically) whacking a mole back into place
Love how it isn't even like she stays home 100% of the time (more reasonable for him to say this), but she works. Sorry, but when you both work, household chores should be the responsibility of both. If you wanna have the luxury of relaxing after work, you'll have to afford enough to make your wife be able to stay at home.
Exactly. My wife and I don’t have kids and both work so we just split all our chores. We both like working so we like this arrangement. Not to say there is anything wrong with the trad wife dynamic, if it makes you both happy then that’s awesome. But I see these guys on the internet who want to have their cake and eat it too. If she pays half the mortgage, you better be doing a couple dishes
@@theslappablejerkYou seem like a great husband and a good man, your wife is lucky to have you. I personally would prefer the "trad" dynamic when I get married to my boyfriend simply because I would love to be closer to our future kids and I also believe he is a hardworking man who does a lot for me and it'd be a way of me showing appreciation towards him. HOWEVER, I am getting a college degree right now and we'll only have this dynamic when kids come along, therefore, I will work for a few years, then do this. It isn't a good idea to jump into this without some sort of experience or education. By the way, I am very honored to get a reply from you!
@@theslappablejerkyeah I prefer it. I paid for the rent and bills with my previous girlfriend and she paid for groceries. She wasn’t lazy and would go out in the day and get new foods and picked out the fresh ones and good products. And she would cook most of the time, do cleaning washing etc but I still helped with washing clothes taking out bins and 9/10 was the one who did the dishes after she cooked so she could rest after cooking dinner. It worked well for us.
@@cherryhazard8002 Make sure to have a secret account to use in case bro goes crazy or switches shit up, a prenup, and make sure he puts money away for you.
@@cherryhazard8002 Okay, but be careful and make sure you have some kind of financial back-up plan in case things go south. Obviously it would be wonderful if your relationship works for the rest of time, but there's also no guarantee that it will, and the last thing you want to happen is for your partner to divorce you, and you suddenly find yourself without any kind of financial safety net to support your kids and yourself.
My wife is probably as close to trad wife as you can get but when she did work, we split things pretty evenly. If anything I probably did more. She had the physical labor job and I had the desk job. When she worked, Some people we knew would criticize her for not helping out more at home. When she became a stay at home wife then mom, people criticized her for not working. Just can’t win
Wild that people can think this way. Like at least in the past women were not expected to work so it wasn’t work and house chores at the same time. Now people are more used to and accepting of the idea of women working but because traditional gender expectations have not completely vanished, it becomes this thing where one person is expected to do the jobs two people did in the past…
This is how it’s supposed to be; splitting the work depending on the situations! I’ve been with my soon-to-be-wife for over 16 years and we’ve switched roles several times depending on the situation. When I was working on my Masters degree and she had a day job we split housework evenly. When covid hit I dropped my degree to work because she was at risk and so she took on 85-90% of the housework while I took on anything that required me to be outside/near people. Now she’s working full time but my mental health has been getting bad so even though I’m at home all day we split housework 60-40 (her doing 40%) while I work on getting better.
Yeah working at Best Buy totally counts as manual labor 🤣🤣🤣 Imagine he works for the geek squad and is complaining about his wife being on the computer
Exactly, like surely he can’t be bad at all forms of housework. Gotta find the thing he is at least half decent at. And if he does genuinely struggle with all types of housework even with teachings of how to do them properly (cooking, cleaning, laundry), then there should be discussions of reasonable accommodations, like splitting up the housework to smaller steps so everyone contributes to everything (like him chopping up the vegetables while she puts them on the pan, or her tying up the trash bag and he drags it out front). And if *that* doesn’t work out, then they should discuss hiring a housekeeper
I honestly do feel slightly bad about that because I know how much mine were looking forward to being grandparents, but I'm obviously not going to bring a human life into the world out of a sense of obligation lol. And no fucking way would I ever get married or have kids willingly, I find the idea horrifying at the best of times, in this day and age frankly I'd rather cover myself in honey and get jiggy with a beehive...
Man here, I feel the same way! my last long-term relationship was so terrible, and the women I have tried to work with have been so toxic that I do not even want a relationship with a woman anymore. I would like to have sex as much as any other man, but women have for the most part rejected me, and the though of paying someone for sex is repulsive to me. I'm just gonna stay mgtow from here on out.
@@ElyR-rt4sw Literally anything you say a wo man if you are not handsome or tall is pestering to them, so no a do not have any unnecessary contact with them. They on the other hand can treat us like absolute trash, and never have any consequences!
This is so common nowadays, so glad you're calling these good-for-nothings out (though those who need this are basically all too dense to realize it applies to them )
They’re not too dense; it’s a game. Men are smarter than they appear. They pretend they don’t understand why you don’t want to do 12 hour days and weekends while they do 8. It works sometimes for awhile but the woman grow to have little respect for them. Been there done that.
I married the right man 😂 my husband literally saw all his laundry was folded (just felt like helping) and said “love, you didn’t have to do that but thank you I really appreciate it” and I was like “well I’m your wife so it’s normal if I help” His response: “but it’s not your job so don’t feel like you have to” We’ve been together for 14 years 🥰 we do tons of cleaning together and I do stuff that I can do when he’s at work and I’m off and vice versa. Teamwork guys.
My husband busts his azz 70 hours a week at work and I do everything at home (though some is delegated to our children simply because they need to learn how to do these things...not because I can't or don't want to do them myself) as well as homeschool our children because *that's my job.* To each their own. As long as what you're doing works and everyone is happy, who gives a fig. I'm glad you found what works for you. May your marriage be forever blessed ❤
Mine too. Team work wins!! Who ever goes home early starts the dinner and the other one does the dishes. Same with our kids routine , we always alternate so that it doesn’t get too much for a single person
@@katie7748”As long as what you’re doing works and everyone is happy” 100% this. No shame if people do want to lean a more traditional or non traditional route; it’s their lives after all and they shouldn’t be told to do y instead if x is already good for them and they’re not being taken advantage of (or taking advantage of their spouse)
I was a sahm and I did EVERYTHING! I paid the bills/tax returns, I eliminated rats, birds, mice, fleas ans head lice. I did all the shopping, cooking from scratch, I ran it on a very low budget, I took out the trash, took the kids to school, appointments, sports, planned the holidays. I always gave bjs regularly (it was not reciprocated) i did the laundry and bought the clothes, repaired the clothes. The only I didn’t do was cut the grass. My husband called me lazy.
@@shmataboro8634A good mom makes you do that, because she's actually teaching you life skills and not doing all of that for you and stunting your growth. Guys that SlappableJerk are portraying want women like their own moms; maids, seeing how they seemed to be brought up that way.
As a trad wife who went back to work PART TIME for 6 months, i do not understand how some people expect this. When i was working and my husband was away for school, i was struggling horribly. Im back to staying home and my husband provides for us and our toddler. Im happy to do the majority of housework and meals knowing that i DONT have to worry about working. Insane how any woman working is expected to keep house.
The sad truth is that in the US, the average working wife does 90% of the housework. And since most women work, it's the reality for most of us 🫠 I hope that someday things get better
@@lauraanderson8785 We don't have to just hope! We can teach women to keep some savings on the side and to have an escape route in case he gets violent no matter how wonderful he is right now (Even if he's perfect what if he gets a head injury and becomes violent? That's totally possible even for the best man so why not be prepared?). Then they'll be in the position to put their feet down when men do this. If a boyfriend does this and doesn't want to change, just leave him. If a husband does this then there's a fight ahead, but we can support women through it! I also hope the status quo improves but I think we can inspire independent spirits and self-respect in women, especially young women, to combat this. Even just recognizing chores as work is a huge mindset shift. Then there's the further shift of realizing men avoid chores because they think drugery belongs to women and that work should be the only unfun thing they have to endure. But even just teaching financial safety is so huge.
But you ARE working dear. Domestic work and child care is work. And yes it's insane to expect anyone to work and then do majority of the child care and house work it's exploiting. I personally belive domestically working mom's should be protected by the law more and compensated more including by the government. This thing of disregard the value and necessity of domestic work and child care is disgusting and disrespect. Respect to you for being a SAHM.
My family has this rule too! My mom and I tend to do most if not all of the cooking. Unfortunately my siblings haven’t been following the rule lately so I also do most of the dishes.
After decades of doing it all myself while holding a full-time job, I told my husband that either he pitches in or he can move out and clean up after himself, and I won’t have to clean up after an extra person. He shaped up right away and is now helping cooking and cleaning with a smile. I’m old. I’m tired I’m done. I need help and if you can’t help me then you can go help yourself. You must remember that you bring a value that they rely on. They know they’re getting a benefit and they’re taking advantage of you. It’s time to remove that benefit and it needs to be an equal household situation. You can’t have a relationship where one person gives and the other receives. It must be balanced. Where both people give, and both people receive.
My dad set such a high standard for me. He worked while my mom stayed home with us kids AND did his share of the housework. He cooked, he cleaned, he got my siblings and I out of the house when my mom needed to rest, and he emphasized that we couldn't just leave all the housework to mom.
I work in a factory. Manuel labor for 3 years, now I’ve been helping in the office for the last few months. Two different kinds of exhausting, but exhausting none the less
I work in a library. It’s mostly desk work, yes, but tomorrow I’m going to spend the day moving boxes up and down a ladder. But he’d tell me it wasn’t manual labor, right?
When you ask your "trad" husband to fix a leaky shower and he says he'll call a plumber. He doesn't do blue collar jobs, they aren't intellectually stimulating.
@@cee-emm see, there is a risk of making an error that could lead to a costly mistake. my deal is, if i have the money, ill let qualified people who do this for a living do it, and then i have their guarantee on the work. not having to make a big home insurance claim because i pinched a gasket and now my bathroom floor has water damage. i could probably learn it, but why risk it when i could have qualified workers and a guarantee. the first comment was kind of denigrating workers, my deal is i know people have their specializations and people should play to their strengths.
@@ryanweible9090 Not really; general plumbing is very straight forward. If it's not septic or well or water softener all you need is a an auger and some caulk maybe pvc and pipe tape pretty much. The auger for clogged pipes is an investment (like 300 bucks) but even if you only ever use it one time you just saved 400 bucks on a plumber. Subfloor in a bathroom is just plywood and maybe a polymer lining- why would you make an insurance claim for a wet subfloor in the smallest room in the house? I am doing this myself in my kids' bathroom and I bought all the materials for cheap (it is quite a small bathroom even for a bathroom though so I am taking a crack at it). You make an error you just fix it (also have a shopvac lol). Turning the water off before plumbing is not too difficult to remember. I think we are far more capable than the experts who bank on our ignorance would lead us to believe. Being handy is awesome. We felt like idiots in our first year of owning a house but we pretty much fear nothing now. I am even halfway done replacing all of the electrical outlets. I never thought I was capable of doing any of this before. Most of it is so easy - faucets are easy; toilets are easy etc. The issue (in my opinion) is not having the time to do these things, not the incapability.
I swear there aren’t enough oil rigs and construction sites in the world to employ all the men who claim they’re working a 14 hour shift while their wives eat bon bons all day.
I literally met a guy like this. He was insisting his girlfriend wanted to be a “freeloader” by staying home when they get married and have kids, but he was also raving about how he wanted her to be a “tradwife.” Long story short, that relationship didn’t work out and that guy is not my friend.
I was married to it for 14 years. The only time he would do minimal housework without throwing a fit is when I had 2 jobs and he didn’t have any. He refused to apply for any job that he felt wasn’t good enough for him, even though my morning job was cleaning houses and my afternoon/evening job was retail. So then I’d come home, he would have done minimal housework, and want emotional support for how bad he felt being unemployed.
If she's working and doing cooking, cleaning, everything, then what is he bringing to the relationship that she needs? Its certainly not his personality. This guy and the boomer would be great together. See who gets mad first.
Either worse than nothing, or the illusion of companionship, or her job doesn’t pay enough for her to afford an apartment alone and this is unfortunately the best option she had for cohabitation
@@lusciouslocks8790 never the best option for a single woman. The best option would be to find a female roommate/s were they can split rent, not play wife to some loser who clearly doesn’t respect nor love her.
Then afterwards he'll go into the Internet and say his wife is "so demanding and ungrateful, not wanting to be feminine", without any context. File for divorce, claim that he is getting "divorce r*ped" even though it's been going well for him, go to a southeast asian country, get a wife from there because she is so "traditional", be the happiest man alive and compare her to his ex all the time without realising that this woman is only with him because he is her ticket to a better life.
I see a lot of people being affected negatively by this phenomenon, western women mostly. I think the part that hurts the most for you guys is when they get the young, new south-east asian wife. I understand that it can be hurtful to feel like you are being "replaced", but if you didn't want to be with the man anymore then it's better to just let go of the past and not let the future of what these guys do affect you. I would say not to judge the asian women too harshly, as everyone wants a better life. Even a western woman getting married in the west is hoping for a better life and I think most western women don't truly understand how asian women think. This is coming from someone who has lived mostly in South-East Asia. I think working on yourself and your own relationships rather than focussing on others (especially those who you dislike) is much better for your mental wellbeing. Anyways thanks for reading and I hope you have a good day!
You're missing the part where he complains about his new wife wanting him to pay for everything and then some, and if she has a side gig she will not be sharing ("a woman's money" it's common thinking way)
@@d.padm3582 Every woman does the things you just described, so for you to insinuate that it's just South East Asian women really shows your ignorance and that being prejudiced is completely fine when it benefits your point of view and hides your hypocrisy. In fact I would say the "side gig" thing is even more prevalent in countries where women work for a living. They see your money as the family money, and their money as their hard-earned spendings. At the end of the day though, men in the West just don't get the respect you'd expect in a normal relationship, so they are leaving (and the stats are quite clear). It's not necessarily about money or anything else like that, it's just that when a man gets treated a certain way he realises that the person he's with doesn't care, which is fine, but don't expect that man to care about you. The fact that this makes you so mad should be a wake--up call to you LOL, but I guess entitlement blinds you to anything but your own desires. Before you go judging other people, maybe you need to actually experience these situations and get a wider view of how the world operates and how these people you vilify really think, instead of making up BS and just going with it.
In reality, he wouldn't file for divorce himself. He'd mistreat his wife until she files, and _then_ he'd claim he's getting divorce-r@ped. And then his mail-order wife would stay married to him just long enough to gain citizenship, and then she'd divorce his ass, too.
Ha, my husband wanted me to be a trad wife and work. I said, "How about this? When you can make enough money for me to stay at home and take care of the kids, laundry, dishes, pets, food etc then I will be happy to be a stay at home wife and do all those things." Then if course he says that I have to work because in this economy one income isn't enough. All I said to him after that was, then don't expect me to work and be a trad wife if you can't even be a trad husband.
As a teen, I dated a man in his 30's, both of us worked full-time jobs, and I would deep clean the house every weekend, but he had the audacity to complain about a day's worth of dishes left in the sink and talked shit about me to coworkers for not getting his clothes out of the dryer fast enough to prevent wrinkles. Ungrateful shit. Now with a man who splits the chores and does his own damn laundry.
These types of men specifically go after younger women so they can control and abuse them. It makes them feel powerful because they’re mentally damaged and week
@@kausha7135 wow I’m 20 and if a 30 year old took interest in me, he’s getting called a pdf. no thanks. also it will never cease to amaze me that grown men are so happy and proud to announce they can’t or won’t do basic chores. they’re literally a part of being a modern human. now if he was paying you to be a housemaid, different story. but he wasn’t. when you (and his future partners, if any) leave the relationship, those chores aren’t ever getting done. that’s embarrassing quite frankly. I don’t know how needing a mommy well into a guy’s 30s and up became so manly and masculine and alpha male. that’s goo goo ga ga.
@@LiterallyAllNamesAreTaken good mentality to have! And seek stories from us older women. We've seen and been through it all. Learn lessons the easy way. And do great things, no man required!!
Bonus points if they think their wives' money should be spent on bills and groceries and the like, but the money they earn themselves should only be spent on fun things for themselves.
I watched this happen personally in slow-motion to a couple that I was roommates with several years ago. At first, when I met them, they presented themselves as reasonable, generally chill folks in their mid-20s (also around my age at the time). We liked to hang out and watch movies and play video games, and we always had good times. I started noticing lots of alt-right content playing on RU-vid in the living room, and then the QAnon conspiracy theories were almost all they ever wanted to talk about. They had never been politically involved or shown interest in human or social issues, and I remember feeling confused -- this was around 2016, and I wasn't privy to the red flags yet, so I re-signed with them for another year. Not much long afterwards, they fully embraced the "Trad" lifestyle, largely based off of ultra-conservative movement, and unfortunately, a streak of White nationalism (racism). While I don't want to disparage anyone's personal relationship choices, I witnessed and intervened in several instances of emotional and physical abuse from the boyfriend. It was such a difficult situation because the girlfriend, who had been brainwashed into the lifestyle at that point, defended the abuser (which many abuse victims do), but this particular flavor of "trad" was especially difficult to dismantle. Unfortunately, it ended with him pulling a gun on a friend of his at Thanksgiving dinner (while extremely drunk) over a political conversation. He stated that the gun was not loaded, and pulled the trigger. The gun was in fact not loaded, but I don't need to tell you how incredibly dangerous and reckless that situation was. I moved out immediately and we never contacted them again. I sincerely hope that their lifestyle and hateful views changed for the better. I cannot overstate how incredibly wild it was to watch reasonable, well-adjusted people fall down this rabbit hole in the short span of two years.
Even if she didn’t work, if he’s at work 9-5 and she’s taking care of the house and kids 9-5, bro, you’re helping around the house. I ain’t looking after another child. As a woman who has a 4 month son, you better believe my husband and I are raising him to be a decent human being. Men, do better; women… choose better
I told my husband this. If he expects me to do all the work at home then I expect him to get a 2nd job to maintain the lifestyle to which I have become accustomed. He don't get both.
I'm tired of these modern "women" not understanding that I can't share my 10% employee discount if I'm tired from putting dishes into the dishwasher. 🙄
I would prefer to have an arrangement where my wife is stay-at-home, but only for the benefit of our children. I understand that I have to probably work 50+ hrs a week and still will need to change diapers too. So it annoys me when guys like this dumb their way in a relationship expecting "trad husbanding" to be cake.
My mom did all housework, cooking, cleaning, plus being by far most present when it came to raising 3 children, while also working full time. When I asked her as a kid why the house work wasn't more equally split between her and dad she said "Idk, never really thought about that". My partner and I now try to split everything equally, while helping each other when one of us is extra tired or something. Because I really thought a lot about this
Always love when these types talk about finding a trad wife, and when the woman plays into it saying things like "oh id love to stay home all day and not have to work" suddenly they complain about it being gold digging. Lol
This is WAY too accurate and on point, you have to decide between having a job and having a job at home, if you have a job, you are "modern woman" and are "putting the man down" but if you dont, you are "goldigger" who "only wants money". These are always told by men who aren't trad husbands themselves, and expect the wife to do everything, because they have never even interacted with a woman, let alone dated one
@@boopdoop2251 but then again they have a list of things that should not be eaten (shellfish, animal blood, and non-hoofed animals) yet most christians even hardliners are lax on dietary stuff
Christ loved the church? What a strange way to say this. There was no church back there. He loved humans, everyone of them. No matter if they followed him or not. Which church tells you something like this? I am generously curious because my church never puts the church in a special place. They say Jesus died for mankind.
@@C-Farsene_5it would be very outdated to follow every rule of the Bible to be fair. There are so many passages of how and what to sacrifice. Imagine the amount of dove blood poured on the altar in a big city with many thousands Christians.
the worst part is the energy itd take for this type of dude to just do the dishes would be way less than to do this every time something needs to be cleaned up...
Sometimes, they eventually break the will of the partner to argue. It’s kind of like Amazon selling at a loss to bankrupt competitors. He’s spending way more energy now, but if he can be so assinine that she ends up doing everything without him needing to ask, we will have gotten what he wanted in the long term…
Tradwife guy here. Girlfriend also works but does digital marketing and WFH irrelevant but i digress. I work at Lowe’s as an MSM (relatively administrative with some labour). I make more money and work longer hours. I love to cook though so i cook most meals and im very clean as i go so the dishes are very few at the end. I also normally end up just bussing them and rinsing them real fast because im very task oriented. But for the tradwife part my gf does trust me entirely with our finances and to make the decisions. To watch our investments and credit. To find us a home in budget. To provide for our animals. To protect her. To make a safe life. In return. She provides a lot of the emotional needs and peace that most men need but struggle to find. I think i lot if guys view tradwife as basically servitude. Its not. Its more submission to agreed upon roles.
This is so well done. If the husband not seeing a problem with making a comparison to his parents didn't make the point clear enough, him saying "we're living in different times" really spelled it out. You're good at _your_ job, that's for sure Jack
