The Crew Meet Kryten - Red Dwarf - BBC 

When Lister drops the "My mate Ace here is incredibly-credibly brave", I swear I almost broke a lung from howling with laughter.

they're dead, they're all dead, everybody's dead, Kryten!

"My god.... I was only away 2 minutes" XD

What's ironic about Rimmer and Kryten's Esperanto conversation is that the Esperanto word for yes isn't 'si', 'jawohl' or 'oui' - it's pronounced the same way as 'yes' in English. In a desperate wild stab in the dark to answer correctly in Esperanto by using all the other languages he knows, Rimmer misses it completely when he could've answered in English and got it right!

That last line spoken by Kryten, "What am I going to to do" "What's to become of me" was taken from George Bernard Shaw play Pygmalion. The line was spoken by the character Eliza Doolittle to professor Henry Higgins as she realises she can never return to the streets as a cockney flower girl with her new upper class manners and speech. David Ross in this scene embodied a lost flower girl with no world to call his own. It was bitter sweet with Howard Goodall choice of soprano saxophone sealed the moment in the hearts of a million viewers for a generation.

A chipper automaton attending to a couple of skeletons for hundreds of years. This is like something you would find in Fallout.

Rimmer's enthusiastic shoulder throw when asking any living ladies to throw up a hand gets me every time.

I know pretty much every line in every episode, but I still laugh every single time. Comedic gold

"my mate Ace here is incredibly incredibly brave" gets me every time

I've love it when Lister's accent really comes out.

I love it how the table scene really brings out Lister's Scouse accent.

That last line Kryten said is actually fairly sad. I felt genuinely sorry for Kryten, he couldn't grasp the idea that humans have a limited life span, and continued to serve dead bodies. Writers were actually geniuses to adapt humour and comedy and a bittersweet tragedy into one scene. It's such an obvious thing that after that much time the original crew wouldn't be alive, but then you see it and that's the time reality kicks in and you feel depressed. Kryten was so innocent in this episode.

Rimmer actually says "They've got less meat on them than a Chicken McNugget.". They muted out 'Mc' in 'McNugget' here, but was restored in the remastered edition of "Kryten" that was released in 1997. On Red Dwarf The Bodysnatcher Collection DVD, Doug Naylor and director Ed Bye explain in the audio commentary for the remastered "Kryten" why it was removed from the original and then later restored in the remastered.

"I think the first thing we should do is bury them." "You're *that* sure they're dead?" "Yes!" "What about this one?"

Rimmer's reaction at 1:03 is priceless.

Great R.D scene.Never forgot it even 30 years after first seeing it.

One of my all time favorite lines from the show was when Kryten said he had only been away 2 minutes. When I first saw that years ago on PBS, I was younger obviously but I still understood it enough to bust out laughing for a good 5 minutes. I missed like 2 scenes after this one because I was laughing. I'm not exaggerating.

One of the best scenes from a show that was full of good scenes.

Getting Robert Llewellyn to be Kryten later was a very smart choice. This guy was ok, but he's no Llewellyn.

I really like the Kryten that Robert plays, but I would've loved to have seen more of this Kryten.

"All right girls. Hands up those of you who are alive." None of them raised their hands. That's also a funny line. "Smeg off dog food face" was also funny when Rimmer said it to Lister. :D

Somehow, I think the original line "They've got less meat on them than a Chicken McNugget" is a lot funnier...

One of my favourite scenes in Red Dwarf 😂

"There's a simple test... Ok girls, hands up those of you who are alive!" lol

This episode of RD has to be without a doubt my all-time favorite. Too many hysterical moments to list. In my humble opinion, Krytie was a welcomed addition to the cast. Lots of magic in those early episodes, eh? Ta.

In the novel *Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers* by Rob Grant, it's revealed that the Nova V crashed shortly after Kryten had cleaned the navacom.

Its actually quite clever of Red Dwarf to make this so funny when, if you give it a bit of thought, this could be really dark. Three women, assuming they survived the crash, slowly ageing as they are waited on hand and foot by a single android, dying, unable to escape (or possibly unable to leave the table due to injuries) and then, after centuries, their decayed bodies still being served by the same android who has now succumbed to computer senility to such a degree that it has lost touch with reality to the point it doesnt even know its charges havent needed him for a long, long time. To walk in on that after youve been drifting in space for so long...

‘I think the blonde one’s giving you the eye’ 😂

Robert Llewellyn really is the superior Kryten

Smee... Smeeeeee... Smeeeeeeeeee...

I so forgot about this show!!! I use to watch it all the time!! Love it!!!

"They have less meat on them than a Chicken Nugget..." Classic :)

It makes me wonder if they all died in the crash as bruised meatbags and then rotted away over time. It's extra heartbreaking when you realise Kryten was clearly never programmed to understand the concept of death or decay.

Kryten: "Anything... the matter?" Rimmer "Anything the matter!? Their dead" Kryten: "Who's Dead?" Rimmer: "They are dead, Their all dead." Kryten: "My god.... I was only away 2 minutes"

oh man, so did i xD rimmer's expression when he looks up and actually sees them used to send me into fits.

Obviously Llewellyn was the best Kryten but this guy did a great job as well. I can't imagine Llewellyn's Kryten could pull off the "I was only away two minutes" line.

love red dwarf :D

Lister's sarcasm xD

Our first contact in 3 million and 2 years and it'd the android equivalent of Norman Bates

I love how he says "incredibly, credibly brave" hehe!

My mate Ace here is incredibly-credibly brave

I love how Kryten has no concept of death, did he not notice they havent said or done much for a long time?

1:55 "Smeg off, dog-food face!" X''D

The Android version of Norman Bates LMAO. Lister trying to tear The Cat away from his own reflection, so funny.

My Favourite Episode

2:36 THEY’VE BEEN DEAD FOR CENTURIES.

“Look girls I don’t know if this is the time and place to tell you this but my friend ace is incrediblycredibly brave” “Smeg off dog food face!” “And he’s got just tons and tons of girlfriends” 🤣😅😂😝😃😄😁😀 absolutely hysterical!?!

Good acting by David Ross at 3:18.

Have you noticed they censored "mcnugget"?

David Ross played Kryten in this episode. Kryten wasn't intended to become a main Red Dwarf member. Ross wasn't able to continue the role (when the character was brought back in season 3) due to scheduling issues so Robert Llewellyn took over.

They are dead there all dead my god I was only away 2 minutes 😂

When I post this it is May 2022. And it is still funny decades later.

Chris Barrie looks like he is about cracking up when try to convince Kryten the girls are dead.

I think the series takes off when Kryten joins.

but I was only away two minutes - best line ever!

After Kryten finally realises the girls are dead, I wanted him to say "I always wondered why they never touched their tea".

David Ross, who played Kryten, also did the voice of Talkie Toaster in Season 4 and reprised it again later on in the series. Is it me, or does Kryten's voice sound a lot higher-pitched than Talkie Toaster's?

Lol the way you can see Rimmer saying McNugget but they muted the Mc (Ronald McDonald must've gone to their house and threatened them)

Notice the little blip when Chris said "Chicken McNugget" at 2:48 - Doug Naylor said this was put in by the BBC who were not allowed to say commercially available food products on air, of course McDonalds owned the McNugget brand, and so the little blip was placed in.

"...But what am I going to DO?" Poor Kryten

You can tell with the look on listers face what they are going to do

Lister: "I think the first thing we should do is bury them!" Kryten: "You're that sure they're dead?" Rimmer: "Yes!"

"Alright Girls, hands up those of you who're alive!"

I do prefer Robert Llewellyn as Kryten over David Ross, but: 1.) David Ross never really got a chance to get going in the role, he may have found his feet in time had he returned (we'll never know now); and 2.) its a bit of unfair comparison anyway as Kryten was originally not intended to become a regular character, so Ross could only make the best of what he was given in one episode (whereas as Robert Llewellyn effectively played Kryten as a completely different character with the same name and got plenty of airtime to flesh the character out more), and I did like Ross' performance as a standalone; and 3.) I REALLY liked David Ross when he returned as Talkee Toaster in Series 4 - I think they should have done more episodes with David Ross in that role personally

I heard in the books the ship crashed because kryten decided the navigation computer could use a good scrubbing

Be strong big man !!! xD

I like red dwarf its a fantastic series. Robert Llewellyn played the kryten character very well. Kryten is a brilliant and funny character. He should of been in all the episodes in series 1. And series 2.

_They're dead, Kryten._

this was hilarious

If you have watched the full version of this Episode, you would have also been introduced to "Ace" Rimmer. He was just and idea at the time, but would later become a reoccuring character.

"I think the blonde one's giving you the eye" ROFL

Upload the scene where Rimmer tries to learn Esperanto.

It was the best resolution possible in 2007

My heart broke a little bit at that part

The original line is"" There is m,ore meat on a chicken MC nugget. The BBC blanked a little of the dialogue to avoid the wrath of Macy Dees in repeats..

i think the blonde 1's givin u the eye...that was so funny i laughed so hard

The original actor to play Kryten was David Ross, he later did the voice of the talkee toaster in white hole

And then Kryten became one of the Best Friends, They ever Had!

Classic Kryton

Somehow the skeletons are still intact despite all the tissue that hold the bones together have rotted away. A bit unusual how in Red Dwarf, Kryten didnt realise something was wrong when serving them consisted of gluing their bones together

Why is the line "I was only away two minutes" so funny? Context? I haven't seen the entire episode.

Back when Lister was still a Scouse

"are you a doctor??"

"I don't know if this is the time or the place girls, but my friend 'Ace' here is incredibly, incredibly brave...?"

1:02, classic!!! =D

this scene in the Novel is even better -

Yeah, I remember someone telling me he was the toaster in that episode. The series is amazing overall. I remember a friend telling me about it in the 90s, but I was never into British sitcoms. I happened to stumble upon one of the marathons that a local tv station was airing to raise money to keep the show airing, and I was hooked! I recently watched all first 8 seasons on dvd again, and it's still just as hilarious as ever. I've made it a rule that my future gal or wife has to be a fan. LOL!

smeg off dog food face tottally smegging epic

Poor old prototype Kryten, he tries so very hard to do well.😢

David ross actually returns to do the voice of talkie toaster in "white hole"

I was always fond of this Kryten....he was such a sad character

"damn you're a work of art baby"

KRYTEN!

My favourite scene, all the fellas are in the zone and each line cracks me up. Cat still macking on the skeletons reminds me of my bro 😂 and did the ladies die just sitting there? Or did kkryten shift them around?

Red Dwarf was honestly one of the greatest shows ever made, and its in part thanks to Kryton getting a second chance cos i have to admit this debut episode for him wasn't great.

glad they got a new actor in for this part

oooh chris barrie in that military uniform. *drools*

The blonde one is giving you the eye

"charmetta!!" looks up "D:"

Char-meet-tah!