I ran five miles this morning, went on a Bumble coffee date (she didn't like me), ate two Whataburger Breakfast sandwiches, and now Timothy drops an episode. Life In The Big City.
That's the kind of optimism society needs. You're assuming humanity doesn't obliterate itself or destroy the atmosphere to the point the planet is uninhabitable. You're doin good, kid.
Getting married today and I specifically saved this pod for when we're all getting ready My entire family thinks I'm insane except the ones from Long Island. To them "he sounds kinda like Vivian's son from down by the train station. You know, the big boy with the drugs problem that works for a hedge fund." This is going to be the best day of my life.
“Taylor Swift is the new President!” Exclaimed Tim Dillon as I drank my warm gin cocktail while eating Cheetos and watching the new season of love on the spectrum shortly before the incoming barrage of nuclear missiles obliterated me.
"Icarus and Daedalus, a father and son imprisoned on the island of Crete, invented wings coated with wax to escape. .....what kind of Florida meth head inventor was Daedalus?? Waxed wings. " Etc. you can imagine it
As a North African I appreciate Tim warning me about the state of the US. As a result I've decided to migrate to the safer and saner country of Ecuador.
Yikes. At first I thought it was a joke and was thinking (no joke) I wonder when tim will talk about taylor swift on this one? Took literally one second after intro 😅
I actually have thought about this a lot and even daydream about a Tim Dillon and Ralph Lauren photoshoot. Tim should be serious and look distinguished like a rich NY businessman. Honestly Tim could clean up very nicely for a photoshoot and I 100% think he would knock it out of the park!
I was feeling pretty down today but I remembered King Pig uploads soon. Filling up my Burger King cup with cheap wine, and continuing on the good fight. 💪🏻
Holy shit I’m from Kansas City and one time in High School my class went to Topeka Kansas to visit the capitol. I was genuinely befuddled by how absolutely depressing that shithole ghosttown fat festival was. The funniest thing was there actually was one last Pizza Hut I went to that was completely barren😂 fuck that place
Tim: Welcome to America. Do you want to work at a spa? Migrant: Yes, yes we’ll go to spa. Tim: Good good… get in the car. We’re going right to the spa. 😅😂
The "Trauma" rant at 24:25 or so, Tim almost says the part where Israel has weaponized the word "trauma" but quickly backs out of it and moves on after remembering he is still in the business of trying to sell scripts.
I laughed so hard with “I wouldn’t even try the case, I would just play the song ‘silly silly, cia runs out cities…’”. I almost choked from laughing 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Tim Dillon instead of pointing blame on the boarder like everyone in congress and administration, is being a true patriot and solving the really tough problems of America
Just watched his hilarious special 'A Real Hero' and felt compelled to stand up for Little Caesars after hearing his, admittedly funny, bit about them. They work with local food banks and each store donates all leftovers every single night to those in need. They have one of the lowest food waste percentages of any fast food chain. It's a pretty well kept secret cuz they're just trying to do a good deed behind the scenes without seeking any recognition. Altruism at its best. Just wanted to throw that out into the interwebs. Thank you for reading this.
