The history of marriage - Alex Gendler 

So Jane Austen's novels with their stories of marrying for love and happiness were cutting edge.

Ghost Marriage... Hopefully no Ghost divorce.

I can't be the only one who loves the idea of having just one partner for the rest of his life...

... has anyone ever married themselves?

History was gayer than you thought

Marraige be like: I love you so much lets get the goverment involve

So, ...what exactly are conservatives trying to conserve about marriage?

A lot of Indigenous cultures' marriages were based around love and, and were part of the entire community. The Abenaki are a great example of this.

"Marriage has always been shaped by society" Always the greatest control on things has been in hands of society

This shoots down the 'traditional marriage' adherents.

Maybe I can marry a ghost. But she has to be really cute.

You didn't mention wacky modern examples of marriage, such as men marrying dogs, electronics, or other non-human objects.

You are telling me that it's normal in some cultures for one to marry a ghost but not a living person because he's of same gender😂 society's messed up!

"Tis my wife." "I can't see her." "Because anything essential is invisible to the eye."

I know some evangelicals that are definitely not going to like this.

When conservatives talk about "preserving the institution of marriage", what are they really talking about?

"As, a society's structure, values and goals change over time, the definition of marriage shall change along with it." Brilliantly summarised.

Think of this when you’re insecure or feel bad about yourself- *your present face is the face that you fell in love with, in your past life* it’s a Japanese legend...I think it’s beautiful

Me, an aromantic asexual who has no interest in marrying platonically watching this video: ｅｄｕｃａｓｈｕｎ

I've watched loads of ted ed, and I just want to say.. Alex Gendler is a genius.

The Video is very misleading. Adelfopoiesis or 'brother-making' was not a marriage and wasn't even done for homosexuals. Married and heterosexual people could do it without any problem. The reason why existed is because the concept of brotherhood was more broader than today and a lot of alliances and friendships involved in some cultures a ceremony of Brother-making, in some cases having something to do with sharing each others blood. Adelfopoiesis was the way of christianizing this practices which dissappeared over time as the Adelfopoiesis did. Althrough there are some Churches in the East who still perfom this kind of ceremonies. The ritual specifically assures that the ones doing it are doing so because of their love-as-friendship and not because of some kind of sexual love. That doesn't assure that all people who did it did't have sexual relations between them, we won't never know that. What we now is that the purpouse of the ceremony was not to do a 'homosexual marriage'. All of this comes from Boswell's misiterpretations of the ceremony by judging ancient doings by modern standards and concepts. Back then there didn't even exist 'homosexuals' as we understand today. Being 'homosexual' wasn't an identity. No one really cared if you had attraction to people of the same sex unless you had sexual relations with them. P.D: The Spanish Gay-Marriage cited in the video was not a marriage but an Adelfopoiesis.

Oh Ghost husband, you’re such a great listener 😁

I'm not a history EXPERT, but even I know that things like the Adelphopoiesis aren't "same sex marriage." It's something more akin to a holy oath of brotherhood and friendship. Adelphopoiesis is by use, intention, and meaning not meant to be a "same sex marriage/union" we know of now.

I like to tell people that when it comes to marriage, form meets function. If your marriage is primarily romantic and emotional in purpose, any arrangement will do. Marry whoever or whatever you love. If you have something higher in mind (hopefully in addition to romance), then certain prerequisites must be met. I'm pretty happy to live in a nation that is free enough, and prosperous enough to have this debate; even if I don't agree with every opinion placed on the table.

And there are cultures that do NOT have marriage concept :)

Am I the only one that wouldn't mind getting married, but definitely don't want children?

Marriage is a 3 ring circus. First there's the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then suffering.

The first guy to get married in the modern world must've thought: I love you so much that I'm gonna get the government invovled so that you can never leave me

Why is married life unhappy? It's common in for one person to feel like they're missing out on because they're “tied down” to someone or feel like they were rushed and pressured into before they were ready. ... If this sounds like you, tell your partner how you're feeling and do what you need to in order to feel happy.

When conservatives say we need to defend traditional marriage send them this

Comments section on this video are a riot. But learned some stuff. I like learning stuff.

The thing is that marriage doesn't serve a practical purpose in today's society. People can live together without being officially married, so the marriage itself means nothing. The only reason people still cling to the idea is because of a romanticized idea of weddings, which have for some ridiculous reason become integrated into our tax return forms.

Ghost Marriage sounds awesome but probably isn't

Imagine being so in love that you get the law involved, this is SCARY!!

Marriage should be about love and companionship not your sexual orientation! Same sex marriages should not be an issue! They have just as much right to marry for love as anyone else!

to me marriage is an recognition of the bond shared between the interaction of two people (or more) bestowed with legal and social entitlements. "A partnership". Marriage as an mean to accomplish lineage and status "family duties" is an mean to an end

"To marry means to halve one's rights and double one's duties" Arthur Schopenhauer

Bang goes traditional marriage.

In France we have a very funny show called "Kaamelott". One of the many characters once said: "As me you are married, so You know that monstrosity can take very diverse forms." That sounds Perfect.

I heard a lot. SOmeone marrying a Love + 3DS, and even married their body pillow. But ghost marriages, for some reason, surprised me a bit.

haha, in your face christians! i keep telling you marriage does not belong to any religion

I’ve been craving for marriage and having my own children for years. The more I want it, the more hurtful will be

This video has many good points. Marriage means different things to different people and cultures. There seems to be a few common themes, mostly bonding, land, inheriting, procreation, commitment, and probably some others. I always thought marriage was a mix of true love and the prospect of a family if possible. If two people love each other in a special way, why not seal the deal? True love is there for a reason after all. Procreation and bringing new humans into this world is very important; I'd argue that if two people want to start a family and contribute to the next generation of future humans, they should truly love each other and want to commit to the massive project that is raising a child... it is very hard but still possible for a single parent to raise a child by themselves so two people would be ideal. The two people should support each other and be loyal no matter what comes at them. Unfortunately, this does not happen all the time... there is a reason why cheating with someone else is bad in most western world societies, but ideally the partners in marriage should truly love being married and love each other. Marriage is usually a beautiful thing, though sometimes two people aren't meant for eachother. It seems like throughout cultures, marriage is for procreation and or to make the love between two people official. Of course not everyone who gets married wants to or is able to start a family, but maybe that's a good thing at this point considering how big the population of the world is right now. Either way I'd argue that the true point of marriage is for true love and happiness.

I think if you want to marry whatever gender it's fine by me as long as it makes you happy

I would add something to love and marriage relation. Muslims and many other religions and cultures acknowledged love as a part of marriage more than a thousand of years ago. Just it wasn't necessary for marriage and it was supposed to develop in marriage or during courting. It is not like all men hated their wives back a thousand years ago.

2017: Men can now marry anime characters via VR

AFAIK - marriage as an institution was created to solve 2 major problems or sources of conflict. 1 - inheritance, as this was often fought over, such as inheriting the throne or dukedom. 2 - social unity, as to secure alliance or to avoid conflict between two clans. obviously the days of these society needs have changed and the meaning of marriage changes with it. but nonetheless the institution of marriage had always served some practical purpose. and love was usually not among it. not because our ancestors are incapable of emotions, but simply put, there are more urgent matters that require solving. and this should be something to keep in mind.

I've also heard of marriage I believe normally only in Asian culture where some men marry in to the brides family and take her name becoming the family's male heir and taking on the duties of the family as if he were born in the family. I've also heard that it's still done today but for some different reasons and that it's normally only the first daughter who does this. There are also couples who start there own family by changing there last names to a completely new one, such as if Gina White married Eric Grayson but both became Mr and Mrs. Reddington. This is normally the couple either wanting to get away from their family's due to problem's or they both think it's fun and a fresh start.

Great vid, clearly explained and very good animation too. Well done!!

0:13 the ones who wishes for stability in life

When I was a kid a teacher of mine says you dont choose who you marry your family do that was in early 2000 , and sometimes you hear old people saying they were 14 or even younger when they get 1st pregnant from their husband and have many children and I became a bit curious and made a little research that choosing someone you love to marry seems only became popular in the mid to late 19th century. and its weird that almost all parts of the world have the same tradition before.

*_Love is a single soul inhabiting two bodies._* -Aristotle. We have come a long long way but we still have a little further to go. The next step for mankind is to learn the truth of life which includes acknowledging our true past. For the first time in mankind's history we can Know the truth as it relates to conscious life and it can and will transform mankind and the world when enough people see it. Search *_Truth Contest_* and read the top entry called the Present.

This book is actually transformative if you bother to spend the effort reading learning and understanding the institution of marriage.

I think God intended for marriage to be between 2 people realistically speaking because anything else breeds jealousy like crazy...

Absolutely fantastic video. I will be showing this to anyone who insists that marriage has always been between one man and one woman.

Was it just me, or did the animations in this video go by really fast? I had to keep pausing it to actually see what the pictures were.

Amazing video, really open the mind to the reality that marriage was never a constant.

I am not getting married ever... and I love being single :)

My perspective about marriage is unless n until both are happy n in love with each other they last... And if both are not... Separation is best option then sufferings.. Being happy matters..

I wish I could marry a whole family of brothers.

I live in the Himalayas but no where have I seen a woman marrying multiple brothers to keep the land within one family.... Maybe this practice was there before my time..

love is simple but not marriage .......

Wonder why youtube algorithm will sende me this on my engagement Anniversary😳😳

Literally humanity's oldest tradition.

Marriage as a social institution makes a lot of sense.

What we fail to see is marriage is an alliance , of two people and their families . Today where females are seen as equals , the bonds of needing a man is not needed , so the alliance is the only part needed .

The authors know nothing of adelphopoesis. Brothers in such unions were united spiritually. You, on the other hand, try to push the idea of a resemblance to a consumed marriage.

4:29 平绮版版白绮配墨 does not mean anything, as far as I can tell, it's just plain gibberish... Either I'm wrong, or they are just not being serious of the contents they created.

that's palestine not israel though

Marriage was originally to decide who should inherit the parents land and property after their death. Nothing more.

In countries that don't have divorce, marriage is more thoroughly thought of as a serious decision, their basis for getting married is not just because they love the person. They also think long term like, how many kids they are going to have, where to live, heck the couple must have the 100% percent blessing of their parents just to get married. That's why i think divorce is something that destroys the family. It makes marriage seem like it is not a big decision and that it is enough reason that you love someone and not see the entire picture. (Of course i totally agree that if you have an abusive partner then you should definitely divorce them or annul them)

I bet some regressives' heads just exploded. :P

Brother making was retroactively described as same-sex marriages in recent scholarship only, and controversially at that. Contemporary sources on the other hand described it only as a ceremony that recognized the strength of two person's friendship. This is an interesting and informative video, but I think the statement of something as fact that's so ungrounded in history reflects poorly on TED's otherwise great reputation. But otherwise, keep up the great work TED-Ed!

I can’t imagine the Honey-do list I’d have with more then one wife.

Marriage is Love between two souls. Not the vessels we inhabit. It’s just that simple. Our bodies are only a driver for our being

You could've included the tidbits from Indian culture where the history of marriage stretches to 1500 BC. How so biased, TED-Ed?

I understand what this presentation is saying, but ultimately, the only true point of marriage from an evolutionary standpoint was to ensure that men and women stayed to together to raise their young. Everything else was tacked on later. I don't get what the point of a legally binding contract would be outside of that.

Well it has been suggested by many experts that marriages are one of the way state can control individuals because they frame the laws for union, inheritance, divorce, asset sharing etc. How a particular State has a view on these topics shapes up the institution of marriage in different countries.

Brother-making, learn something new every day!

someone marries me against my will if I was dead, message in the steam of the bathroom mirror would read: I WANT A DIVORCE

A the enlightenment. Such an interesting era that changed so much, marriage included. Awesome video!

"平綺版版白綺記墨"is not Chinese version of marriage. the correct one is 婚姻。

Why did you say Israel when it wasn't here 70 years ago?

1:45 How come U mention the so called Israel as an ancient civilization they were established 1940, It's palastine & It will always be

Well, since all the other RU-vidrs are expressing their views on marriage instead of talking about the video, I will too: Marriage should be abolished, blah blah... Seriously, it's a cultural thing. There is no need for the government to get into it anymore. No need for tax benefits or anything else. Of course, if the government finally declares that they are no longer handing out those official papers to be signed, the corporations that prosper off of marriage will eventually decline.

Best channel TED-ED

4.29, Chinese speaker be like " what does “平绮版版白绮记墨" got to do with marriage?" lol.

Well the only thing not mentioned is how young the girls were when they were married

This is a very subjective representation of marriage. For instance, it may be very possible that in some part of the world in a remote villages a man married to a donkey, local religious and civil authorities have validated and recorded the union. Should we call that union marriage? No matter how much marriage evolves there is a union that must be distinguished from all types of unions, sociobiological bond between male and female for the purposes of reproduction, one of the pillars of humanity and civilization !

thanks for telling us the history of marriage

And people still think that LGBT community is a new trend.

I think those were just supposed to be brother hood things I support same sex marriage though

m a sociology student this makes it easy to understand the society and the cocept of marriage it being a social institution😊

I love healthy marriages

Brilliant video!

Thanks for the colors at the end tedx. Doth you not know we are all watching this at 1am on a work/school night :/

1:46 that’s the land of Palestinian . let her see it guys

0:40 Pair bonding and raising children is OLDER than humanity itself

Well ted-ed should be the highest rated channel in the world 💫❣️

If I can marry a ghost, I can also date one. Finally a remedy for my single life.