THE REAL SLIM SHADY | Medieval Bardcore Version | Eminem vs Beedle the Bardcore 

The best rappers of the medieval ages were Slender Shadow, Alchemist Dre, 50 Shillings, and Snoop Hound

The pope doesn’t have to cuss in his ballads to sell records, well I do, so have at him and have at thee too

"Will the real slim shady please stand up?" - Sir Marshall Mathers Bruce III, 1073

“Sir William Smith doesn’t has't to sayeth degrading remarks in his sonnets to selleth his poems. Well, i doth so disregard that gent and disregard thee too!”

“Thou act as if thou hast never seen an Anglo-Saxon before”

“... just ask Alchemist Dre, he’s confined to my larder.”

Two harlots wander outside! Wander outside! Wander outside!

"And thine physician Dre said thus: Absolutely nothing, ye fools! Yon physician Dre is slain, for he hath been locked in mine cellar!"

If something like this actually dropped during that time, people would have lost their shit.

"And Charlemagne said... nothing, you idiots! Charlemagne is dead, he's locked in my basement!" The bishop of Aachen

May I have gods attention please? May I have divine intervention please? Will the REAL Slim Lady Please Rise up? I repeat, will the REAL Slim Lady Please Rise up? we are gonna be having a problem here... y'all act like y'all never seen a white knight before. Arms all on the floor just like vikings bust in your door and started looting your cart worse than before when you were ignored, and was, throwing you over furniture. Its the Return of the ... Ah wait... no Say, you're grinning, He didn't just Lay withwhom I think he did, did he? and Pastor Dre Said... Nothing you Heretics, He locked up in my En-Crypt-ment. Lepardists Love Licking Ham. [Chicken,chicken,chicken] Slim Ladies, Im sick of em Look at em, walking around grabbing their you know what Flipping to you know who yea but they're so cute though yea probably got couple of nails in my helm loose But no worse than whats going on in your Sacred Ballrooms Sometimes i wanna get on stage and just let lead our goose, but cant but its cool for Sir John to ride a Dead Moose. My dump is in your cliffs, my dump is in your cliffs, and if ur lucky... i might drop in a little fish... and that's the message our fine gods gift and expect them not to know what a missionaris is. ofcourse theyre gonna know what a chorus is by the time they hit fourth year they got community charity don't they? We have nothing but handles, well, some of us in shackles, who cut other peoples hands off for stealing chickens [OOPS!] but if we can ride mules and antelopes, then there is no reason why a bat and cat can't be rode. [EWWW] But if you feel like I feel, I got the poison antidote Wizards wake your cauld-e-rons, light that fire high and it goes, (Chorus) Cuz Im the white wizard, yes Im the white wizard, all you other wizzas just imitatin, So wont the real strong Wizz please rise up, please rise up? (Chorus) White knight doesn't have to cuss to get records, well... I do, So shag them and shag you too. You think I give a Damn about an army? Half you Orcs cant even stomach me, let alone smell me... But Wiz what if you win? wouldn't It be weird? Why? So you guys could just lie to bait me here? So I can sit in jail and fight some bears? Paladin better switch me chairs So I can sit next to King Arthur and Altair. And hear them argue over who's slain the dragon first. Little Itch, Put me in a Bath in Bently "Yeah hes a brute but I think hes married to Gwenn" "Hihi" I should downgrade her horseshave and show the whole empire how she gave me an Evil Dead twin. I'm sick of your little barbarian tricks, All you do is annoy me. So I have written orders to DESTROY YOU. And there is a Million of us, Just like me, Who fight like me, who chop limbs just like me, who dress like me, Walk talk and drink like me, they just might be the next best thing, but not quite christianity.

This actually sounds like a legit medieval song

“My hindquarters are situated upon thou lips, and if my timing is fortuitous then perhaps thou will give it a kiss.”

Jokes aside, imagine how cool this music would be for the medieval people

If your still listining 4000 years later, your a legend

Honestly the people’s clapping sound make it so much more intense I can picture them dancing around and clapping so intensely

"i am lord Slim of the Shady clan, the authentic Slim of the Shady clan, all others who claim to be this man are fraudulent; will the true heir to the Shady dynasty standeth up? standeth up? standeth up?"

It took me two minutes to realise there weren't gonna be any lyrics.

i remember the huge radioplay this song got back in 1208-1210 A.D. This song was everywhere.

Usually these sound MAD different but It’s mad funny how close this one actually sounds to the original

Will the Real Slim Shady please arise!

I bid thee, wouldst the legitimate heir to the Shady dynasty do this court the honour of rising to thine feet? I repeat, would the legitimate heir to the Shady dynasty do this court the honour of rising to thine feet? We wilst has a difficulty here. Thee all act as though thou hast never seen a claimant with Papal support before, thine jaws all on the floor like mine knights all just breach'd thine fort, 'nd started sacking the town like its never been sack'd before, The pope refused him divorce, so he threw the whole church out, Twas the return of the, mine god; he surely didn't utter what I could sweareth he did did he? And Da Vinci said, nothing, thine imbeciles, Da Vinci's dead, just ask the pope, Ecclesiastics love lord eminem, Pray, pray, pray, lord Slim of Shady, I beeth sick of him, Crusading around, swinging his you know what, conquering you know who over in you know where, Waving thine banner, thine telleth truth but he beeth so pious tho, Yeah I probably gotteth a couple of nails of the true cross loose, But it beeth not a bit worse than what's goin on in the Byzantine emperor's bedroom, When mine humors be unbalanced I just wanna get in the town square and leteth loose, But cannot, though it be holy for the king of Spain to marry his own sis, Pope's hindquarters be on thine face, hindquarters on thine face, And if you're fortunate he might sell you an indulgence, Thus this beeth the message we preach to little squires, And expect them to not know what adam and eve do'eth,

I need a historical drama series like The Borgias where Eminem plays a character, so each time he enters the scene, this plays in the background.

"Willard Smythe needeth not use profanity in his rhymes to entertain His Majesty!" Well, I do! So fye upon him and fye upon thee, too!

Friend: what type of music do you listen to? Me: It's complicated

When the King’s bard gets accused of witchcraft for spitting pure flames

The flute part is INCREDIBLE !!

Just imagine emperor Justinian marching with this song.

Did I need this? No Did I search for this ? No Did it listen to the whole thing!?...yes

I have a feeling if Eminem were around in medieval times, he'd be a court jester

I love the flute in this. The whole song is very well composed, it sounds like an authentic medieval song but is also easily recognizable.

"Willst the Real Slimmest Shady Please Rise?" "Thoust act as thou hast not seen a Saxon before! Jaws on the quarry, first and before the Lord, like Henry came through the door and began to flog the peasents to the floor." "Thou has Returnst of the, wait, pray, did thoust speakst what thine said?" "Spinsters adore M of the M, prattle prattle prattle Slim Shady look at his character, speakst horridly, he accosts his member, but, pray tell, thoust believes he is admirable?"

Marshall Mathers really does sound like a Medieval Squire's name

Imagine if eminem rapped in medieval times. Lords throughout the land: This outrageous rhyming and audacity will lead to beheading

I just imagine a huge army marching down a hill with a band of horns bumping this to war lmao ⚔️

"Will the real slim shady please come forth and stand?"

Just imagine going back in time and translating modern music hits into ye olden style and becoming THE most renowned musician in the medieval era

" I am Sir Slim of the House of Shady Verily I hath proof of my lineage If a knave claimeth to be of the House of Shady He beeth an impostor If thou beest the true Sir Shady Wouldst thou rise? Wouldst thou rise? Wouldst thou rise?"

Imagine a jester just starts playing this for his king, and the king is so impressed that the jester is made the new heir to the throne.

Americans, Chinese= "Build the Wall, Ye' shall fortify for trade war" Indian-Europeans= "Build the SILK-Road, Thy shall trade again"

everybody gangsta till the Bard's start spits some rhymes.

The flute sections went hard

"May the true Slender Shadow Please Come Forth? I say, may the true Slender Shadow please Come Forth? Ay, we have a predicament here."

The flute solo is lit as hell!

Imagine this was played back then in every castles at the kings birthday

"Sire what would thou liketh to listen to?" "That magical hymn from wonderful kingdom of Detroit. "

i imagine them playing this is the whole church shaking and vibrating, that picture honestly makes it even better

Ah yes, the greates compositors of the dark ages. Gracili Umbra, Alchemist Dre, L Denarios, Snoop Canis, Famosus M.A.G.N.U.M, Glacies Cubus, Methodo Vir and Prodigium. Absolute legends.

That was epic. I could see this played in a rowdy, seedy tavern

"You can't just make a medieval style cover of modern rap" Beedle The Bardcore: "Holdeth mine mead"

Composed by poet Marshalithlus Mattherton, better known as Shady The Malnourished, circa 1400.

When you are the only white European traveling on the silk road

Ya'll act like you never seen a peasant before, spilled barley all over the floor

Imagine a crowd of medivial people headbanging to this.

im sure if shady saw this he'd come up with lyrics of that time era to suit this

The flute solo is GODLY

Thou shouldest make thyself a Spotify playlist for thy bangers, my brother.

we're gonna need a full track with a medieval rap translation and a videoclip

'tis a bopeth of utmost extravagance as the slim is bestowed upon with the absence of light, of which is shade. fare morrow, fair lads and lassies as I shall be enveloped in the sheer beauty and grace of this global justice thy Beedle hath crafted with the hands of a bard.

This reminds me of my childhood when we were dancing to this, people plaguing in the streets, dying of starvation and rat bites but we didn’t care. I forgot to milk the goat so I wasn’t allowed to go outside until I’d milk them. So I’d milk them fast to go meet up with my first live Bartholomew higglesbender

When someone asks who’s the heir to the iron throne and like five other people stand up with you

This song hit me harder than black death..

Napoleon was definitely bumping while crossing the Alps

This shit pops even years later, shady made a tune that just works

If Dr. Dre was born in the Middle Ages.

Hear yee. Hear yee, Wont he whose is known as Slim, son of Shady please arise amongst us?

Lord Marshall, Son of Matters

When they send in the jester in attempts to amuse the king

'Sir William Smith needeth not swere in his speech to earn shillings, butan i have to, fike him and fike thou too'

Clarence the Bard: "Is this boss music to which I harken?"

I play your music in the background while giving D&D session recaps to my party. It elevates the adventure immeasurably

this is just an alarm ringtone for a civilian living in a medieval valley

Sounds like something you would hear in a kids halloween movie, Nostalgic.

Kinghts of the round table: **nothing** King arthur walks in: Edit: what when did I get that many likes?

Ah yes, "the search for the real Sir Shady the Thin" one of my favorite medieval tunes

Wow! This shows that with music anything is possible, no matter what kind it is, thank you Beedle for this beautiful art.

What plague doctor Andre said?! Nothing you Jobbernowl! He's incarcerated in my dungeon!

This has to be the best medieval cover I've ever heard. 10/10 needs to be longer

"Hear ye, hear ye. I summon the worthiest of Slims from the house of shady. I do say, I summon the worthiest of Slims from the house of shady... If none are worthy, I do forewarn a ramification." ⚔️💂🏻‍♀️🛡

I think this is the best medieval interpretation I’ve heard; the instruments fit so perfectly-though all the songs are amazing indeed! 💯🙏🏽🎵

“Y’all act like you never seen a piss bucket before...”

I can imagine this being the most played piece of music in the medieval taverns

"Saint Nestor did not hath to curse to sell chronicles; well *I* do, so fie on him, and fie on thee too"

Why does this go so fucking hard?!?! 💜👌🙌 We need a super deep, misty mountains slim rap to insert here

Thou art acting as if never beheld a fair skinned countryman before.

This sounds like it would go with a scene in a movie where someone is up to mischievous things

Everyone gangsta till Bard Slim of Shady begins to play

These videos have some of the best comment sections on the internet, I swear.

Will the legitimate Slimeth of Shadington please arise from his seat?

Lyrics by Dorian Winston: I bid thee, wouldst the legitimate heir to the Shady dynasty do this court the honour of rising to thine feet? I repeat, would the legitimate heir to the Shady dynasty do this court the honour of rising to thine feet? We wilst has a difficulty here. Thee all act as though thou hast never seen a claimant with Papal support before, thine jaws all on the floor like mine knights all just breach'd thine fort, 'nd started sacking the town like its never been sack'd before, The pope refused him divorce, so he threw the whole church out, Twas the return of the, mine god; he surely didn't utter what I could sweareth he did did he? And Da Vinci said, nothing, thine imbeciles, Da Vinci's dead, just ask the pope, Ecclesiastics love lord eminem, Pray, pray, pray, lord Slim of Shady, I beeth sick of him, Crusading around, swinging his you know what, conquering you know who over in you know where, Waving thine banner, thine telleth truth but he beeth so pious tho, Yeah I probably gotteth a couple of nails of the true cross loose, But it beeth not a bit worse than what's goin on in the Byzantine emperor's bedroom, When mine humors be unbalanced I just wanna get in the town square and leteth loose, But cannot, though it be holy for the king of Spain to marry his own sis, Pope's hindquarters be on thine face, hindquarters on thine face, And if you're fortunate he might sell you an indulgence, Thus this beeth the message we preach to little squires, And expect them to not know what adam and eve do'eth, I beeth lord Shady, yay, the real Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So I bid the legitimate lord Shady, please rise up, I bid thee, rise up! Yay, I beeth lord Shady, the legitimate lord Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So i bid rhe legitimate lord Shady, please rise up, I bid the, rise up! Lord Smith finds no need to curseth to gain applause and appraise, I counter, I do, so devil sodomize him, and you too, Thee assume I countenance royal praise? Fully one half of you monarchs can't stomach me, let alone knight me, "Milord if you win wouldn't it be the most queer occurance?" Why, so thee could'st just deceive me to gain mine presence? So I could be seated in the hall next to lady Spears of Brittany, I say, Christina of Aquitaine best be willing to switcheth thine chairs, So I can be instead seated next to Blackadder and Percy, And listen to them argue over whose phallus was pleasured firstly, Little harlot denounced me to the pope himself, "Yay he be pious but he also revoked my cousin's title, hee hee" I ought to transcribe her utterances to parchment, Showeth the whole of christendom what a harlot she be, I beeth plagued by the existence of thine bard groups comprised of whelps and bitches, All thine do is frustrate me, thus the lord hast senteth me to destroy thee, I have a million soldiers just like me, Who march, slay and crusade like me, Who give nayeth a fuck like me, They beeth the next best to me, but they still be not quite me. Yay, I beeth lord Shady, yay, I'm the real Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So I bid the legitimate lord Shady please rise up, I bid thee, rise up! Yay, I beeth lord Shady, yay, I'm the real Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So I bid the legitimate lord Shady please rise up, I bid thee, rise up! I beeth disconcerting to listen to, for I maketh the jests, Thee only maketh with thine trusted vassals in thine private rooms, Difference being, I get out in the feast hall and sayeth it in front of the royals, Furthermore, I be not false or smother mine words with honey, I just stand up and preacheth it, Regardless of if thee wilst admiteth it, I spit it, Better than nine out of ten of the bards out there, Then you wonder "why beeth our squres be on thine opium?" At the current rate I'll be the only one on crusade rapin', Pillaging towns like we beeth fighting for Odin, And I'm fighting, but this whole town of harlots isn't working, But I tell thee, every knight is but a lord shady in wait, He could be on the town watch, lettin' raiders through your border spots, Or roaming the eastern steppes, raiding, screaming "for the Tengri" With his camp down and his crossbow up, So willeth the legitimate lord Shady please rise up, And put one sword in each hand up, And be proud to beeth out on crusade and pillaging, I bid thee, once more into the chorus, how does it goeth? Yay, I beeth lord Shady, yay, I'm the real Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So I bid the legitimate lord Shady please rise up, I bid thee, rise up! Yay, I beeth lord Shady, yay, I'm the real Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So I bid the legitimate lord Shady please rise up, I bid thee, rise up! Yay, I beeth lord Shady, yay, I'm the real Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So I bid the legitimate lord Shady please rise up, I bid thee, rise up! Yay, I beeth lord Shady, yay, I'm the real Shady, all thine impostor lord Shadys are just usurpin, So I bid the legitimate lord Shady please rise up, I bid thee, rise up! Ha ha, I guess there be a lord shady in all of us. Except lollard heretics. Sodomize the peasants, let's stand up!

This sounds like entering a new peaceful but shady town in a classic rpg

Love how you add just a little bit of something to every verse. The song just keeps growing.

A bit boring without the lyrics... This song needs some gregorian chanting...

The song our grandparents listen to when they were young

Bro medieval got some next tier bass💀💀

Oh, this is so good!

They say Alchemist Dre made that troubadour famous all over the realm.

I feel click baited that there was no old english rapping in this.

This is the video I discovered this channel on. I'm subscribed and saved most of them to a playlist. I LOVE this channel.

This is so good. I’m sitting here asking myself how did I not discover this sooner….I simply did not know. Shame on you RU-vid algorithm